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Autumn Shanklin
Creative Writing, 4
Final Portfolio
December 19, 2012
Autumn Shanklin
PBJ
After a long night of drinking, Kean woke up lying on the bench seat by the kitchen table. With his stomach grumbling he stumbled to the empty cabinet. He grabbed the only thing in there, peanut butter, and tossed in on the dirty table. He grabbed the last two stale pieces of bread off the counter and slammed it by the peanut butter. He stumbled to the refrigerator and shuffled all the beer around to find the last bit of jelly he had. He opened the broken drawer only to find that there was no silver wear in there. Kean plunged his stained black hand into the murky dish water and grabbed a knife that hasn’t been clean in weeks. He wiped it off on his bright orange shirt and headed back to the tabled. He dug the knife into the peanut butter and spread it on a piece of bead. He licked the knife and stuck it into the jar of jelly. He took the last of the jelly and spread it on the last piece of bread. As he smashes the two pieces together his dog, no bigger than a football, walks to his empty food bowl and starts to whine. Kean tosses the dog the knife covered with jelly to lick along with the crust of the bread that was polka-dotted with mold. From the table he tosses the jelly jar to the over-flowing trash can and misses, shattering the jar. “Ah shit, I’ll get it when I’m done eating.” he mumbles to himself. He scarfs down the sandwich, barely chewing it and grabs a beer out of the fridge to wash it down. Already late for work, he storms out of the kitchen and rushes out the door.
PBJ Polished
After a long night of drinking, Kean woke up lying on the bench seat by the kitchen table. With his stomach grumbling, he stumbled to the empty cabinet. He grabbed the only thing in there, peanut butter, and tossed in on the dirty table. He grabbed the last two stale pieces of bread off the counter and slammed it by the peanut butter. He stumbled to the refrigerator and shuffled all the beer around to find the last bit of jelly he had. He opened the broken drawer only to find that there was no silverware in there. Kean plunged his stained black hand into the murky dish water and grabbed a knife that hasn’t been clean in weeks. He wiped it off on his bright orange shirt and headed back to the tabled. He dug the knife into the peanut butter and spread it on a piece of bead. He licked the knife and stuck it into the jar of jelly. He took the last of the jelly and spread it on the last piece of bread. As he smashes the two pieces together his dog, no bigger than a football, walks to his empty food bowl and starts to whine. Kean tosses the dog the knife covered with jelly to lick along with the crust of the bread that was polka-dotted with mold. From the table he tosses the jelly jar to the over-flowing trash can and misses, shattering the jar. “Ah s-, I’ll get it when I’m done eating.” he mumbles to himself. He scarfs down the sandwich, barely chewing it and grabs a beer out of the fridge to wash it down. Already late for work, he storms out of the kitchen and rushes out the door.
Non- Fiction Essay
Holy Shit! RUN!
Autumn Shanklin
It was a normal Friday night. Erin, Zack, Jimmy, Adam, Tyler, MC, and I were all crammed into Zack’s tiny basement kitchen. The room was stuffy and still which made the all the cigarette smoke linger in one spot. Jimmy broke the silence finally. “One time me and Jeff were cutting through the cemetery and I swear to god we saw a hobo sleeping on a head stone.” Instantly a light bulb popped above mine and Erin’s head. In perfect harmony, we both screamed “LETS GO HOBO HUNTING!” almost as if we planned it. They all looked at us like we have five heads and one eye. “Um I don’t really think I would feel right killing a hobo, I mean after all they are humans too” Jimmy sarcastically said. “No, lets go find the hobo!” Erin said as she rolled her eyes. After a minute of contemplating it we all piled into the car. We parked on a dead end street, jumped out of the car and started to cut through thick woods to get to the graveyard. Suddenly there was a loud scream, everyone whipped their heads around to see that I had slipped and fell straight on my butt. After several minutes of laughing, I got up and we continued into the woods. Once inside the cemetery we decided it would be more productive to separate into two groups. Erin, Zack, Adam, and I went to the left while the others went to the right. We started fooling around to act like we weren’t scared but in reality none of us had been more scared in our life. It was a foggy night and there was a cold breeze coming from the woods. The full moon let off a little glow every time the clouds allowed it to. We stood at the top of a steep hill working up the courage to go down it. It was a steep hill that was surrounded by trees which drowned out any moonlight. I gripped Adam’s hand tight just as Erin grabbed Zack’s and we pushed forward down the hill. Adam started throwing anything he could find at trash cans to make sure the hobo didn’t crawl into one of them for the night. He threw a big rock at the metal trash can and just as it made a clinking noise we heard the crunch of leaves. I turned around to see a dark figure standing in the grass, thinking it was the hobo I started to run and left my friends standing there. After sprinting about 50 yards I noticed my friend never came so I decided to go back and see why. Half way back I saw more people standing where I had left my friends, and laughter started to fill the air. I get back to see all my friends standing there, turns out the dark figure I had seen was just MC. Embarrassed, I said “ Well if you weren’t so black I’d be able to see you better! Maybe we should all stay together now, I feel a lot safer with MC and Tyler because the black people always die first.” After we all got a few more jokes in we decided to find our way back to the car. After an hour of walking someone finally said “Does anyone know where we are because I’m pretty sure we should have been back to the car by now…” Zack confidently said “I know how to get out, trust me!” We walked on for another 15 minutes when something stopped us all in our tracks. We were at the top of a hill looking down at what looked to be a person. No one moved, including the person at the bottom of the hill. After what seemed like years someone noticed that “person” has leaves growing out of every part of its body. At this point we were all letting our imagination get the best of us. Moments later something else stopped us dead in our tracks, this time it was moving and everyone took off running except Erin. “Why are you running? There is nothing there!” she screamed. Zack and I hesitantly walked back to point out what we saw. “I still don’t see anything! You guys are just fuc...” Before she could finish her sentence she saw the hobo move. We ran faster than we have ever run before. In no time we caught up to the others. With the hobo nowhere in sight we stopped to catch a breath. Almost as if it was magic, the hobo appeared right behind us. This is about the time “flight or fight” comes into play. Like they say, great minds think alike, so we all quickly decided flight would be the better option. As we were running something dark and apparently hard hit Zack in the eye but nothing could stop us from running. Suddenly MC turned around, picked up the dark object, and slipped in back onto his foot. AS he
Autumn Shanklin
looked back up to start running he was face-to-face with the hobo. Once he saw how big the hobo actually was he decided flight would be the better option again. As we were running the hobo kept appearing and disappearing as if he was playing a game with us, a game that we didn’t want to play anymore. Eventually we found our way back to the car. In a panic, we were all trying to open doors to feel the security of the car. All the doors were locked and Zack was frantically rummaging through his pockets. He turned every pocket inside out but the keys were nowhere to be found. “Guys… I think I lost my keys while we were running. We are gonna have to go back and find them or we aren’t going anywhere tonight.” Zack said with a crack in his voice. We all sighed and took a moment to catch our breath. Thinking about everything that just happened we were terrified to go back in there, the hobo could be anywhere waiting for us to come back. We walked slowly back into the woods looking around every which way. This time we all had our cell phones out for a little extra light. We were walking with our heads down which turned out to be very dangerous. Jimmy got clothes lined by a long branch. This lightened the mood a little and gave us all a chance to laugh. Luckily we found Zack’s keys not too far from the entrance of the cemetery. Excited to get home and away from any hobos, we jogged back to the car. This time the mood of the car was different, the crammed car made everyone feel a sense of security. Now that we were all safe and hobo-free we started laughing about the whole situation. “Dude, what if we woke up and we were all hobos?” Jimmy asked with a serious face. We all laughed and the jokes continued. I have never been happier in my life to be alive then I was at that moment. A few weeks later we were all once again in Zack’s basement kitchen. “So I brought some numb chucks, I thought we could go find the hobo again. I will protect us.” Erin said as she started to twirl her black numb chucks above her head. “Um Erin, those are foam and couldn’t hurt a fly. And you would be the last person I would trust to save my life.” Jimmy said laughing to himself. “Whatever douche bag!” Erin said as the numb chucks flew out of her hand and hit Jimmy in the mouth. Jimmy’s hand instantly flew over his mouth. “Oh sorry I thought they couldn’t harm a fly.” Jimmy was now the joke of the night. After about a half hour our stomachs started to growl. We filled the car and went to Schnucks to get some food for dinner, passing the cemetery on the way. There was flashing red and blue lights coming from the cemetery with yellow crime scene tap blocking off the main entrance. “I hope the hobo didn’t die!” Zack said. We went into Schnucks and got to big frozen pizzas. As we were on our way home we noticed a big white crime unit van pulling out of the cemetery. We rushed home, threw the pizzas in the oven and flipped the TV on to channel two. The news wasn’t on so we thought nothing serious had happened. The next day I woke up from a mass text message saying that police had ironically found a dead body in the cemetery. None of us have ever put one foot into that cemetery since then.
Non-Fiction Essay Polished
Holy Shit! RUN!
It was a normal Friday night. Erin, Zack, Jimmy, Adam, Tyler, MC, and I were all crammed into Zack’s tiny basement kitchen. The room was stuffy and still which made the all the cigarette smoke linger in one spot. Jimmy broke the silence finally. “One time me and Jeff were cutting through the cemetery and I swear to god we saw a hobo sleeping on a head stone.” Instantly a light bulb popped above mine and
Autumn Shanklin
Erin’s head. In perfect harmony, we both screamed “LETS GO HOBO HUNTING!” almost as if we planned it. They all looked at us like we have five heads and one eye. “Um I don’t really think I would feel right killing a hobo, I mean after all they are humans too” Jimmy sarcastically said. “No, lets go find the hobo!” Erin said as she rolled her eyes. After a minute of contemplating it we all piled into the car. We parked on a dead end street, jumped out of the car and started to cut through thick woods to get to the graveyard.
Suddenly there was a loud scream, everyone whipped their heads around to see that I had slipped and fell straight on my butt. After several minutes of laughing, I got up and we continued into the woods. Once inside the cemetery we decided it would be more productive to separate into two groups. Erin, Zack, Adam, and I went to the left while the others went to the right. We started fooling around to act like we weren’t scared but in reality none of us had been more scared in our life. It was a foggy night and there was a cold breeze coming from the woods. The full moon let off a little glow every time the clouds allowed it to. We stood at the top of a steep hill working up the courage to go down it. It was a steep hill that was surrounded by trees which drowned out any moonlight. I gripped Adam’s hand tight just as Erin grabbed Zack’s and we pushed forward down the hill. Adam started throwing anything he could find at trash cans to make sure the hobo didn’t crawl into one of them for the night. He threw a big rock at the metal trash can and just as it made a clinking noise we heard the crunch of leaves. I turned around to see a dark figure standing in the grass, thinking it was the hobo I started to run and left my friends standing there. After sprinting about 50 yards I noticed my friend never came so I decided to go back and see why. Half way back I saw more people standing where I had left my friends, and laughter started to fill the air. I get back to see all my friends standing there, turns out the dark figure I had seen was just MC. Embarrassed, I said “ Well if you weren’t so black I’d be able to see you better! Maybe we should all stay together now, I feel a lot safer with MC and Tyler because the black people always die first.” After we all got a few more jokes in we decided to find our way back to the car. After an hour of walking someone finally said “Does anyone know where we are because I’m pretty sure we should have been back to the car by now…” Zack confidently said “I know how to get out, trust me!” We walked on for another 15 minutes when something stopped us all in our tracks.
We were at the top of a hill looking down at what looked to be a person. No one moved, including the person at the bottom of the hill. After what seemed like years someone noticed that “person” has leaves growing out of every part of its body. At this point we were all letting our imagination get the best of us. Moments later something else stopped us dead in our tracks, this time it was moving and everyone took off running except Erin. “Why are you running? There is nothing there!” she screamed. Zack and I hesitantly walked back to point out what we saw. “I still don’t see anything! You guys are just fuc...” Before she could finish her sentence she saw the hobo move. We ran faster than we have ever run before. In no time we caught up to the others. With the hobo nowhere in sight we stopped to catch a breath. Almost as if it was magic, the hobo appeared right behind us. This is about the time “flight or fight” comes into play. Like they say, great minds think alike, so we all quickly decided flight would be the better option. As we were running something dark and apparently hard hit Zack in the eye but nothing could stop us from running. Suddenly MC turned around, picked up the dark object, and slipped in back onto his foot. AS he looked back up to start running he was face-to-face with the hobo. Once he
Autumn Shanklin
saw how big the hobo actually was he decided flight would be the better option again. As we were running the hobo kept appearing and disappearing as if he was playing a game with us, a game that we didn’t want to play anymore.
Eventually we found our way back to the car. In a panic, we were all trying to open doors to feel the security of the car. All the doors were locked and Zack was frantically rummaging through his pockets. He turned every pocket inside out but the keys were nowhere to be found. “Guys… I think I lost my keys while we were running. We are gonna have to go back and find them or we aren’t going anywhere tonight.” Zack said with a crack in his voice. We all sighed and took a moment to catch our breath. Thinking about everything that just happened we were terrified to go back in there, the hobo could be anywhere waiting for us to come back. We walked slowly back into the woods looking around every which way. This time we all had our cell phones out for a little extra light. We were walking with our heads down which turned out to be very dangerous. Jimmy got clothes lined by a long branch. This lightened the mood a little and gave us all a chance to laugh. Luckily we found Zack’s keys not too far from the entrance of the cemetery. Excited to get home and away from any hobos, we jogged back to the car. This time the mood of the car was different, the crammed car made everyone feel a sense of security. Now that we were all safe and hobo-free we started laughing about the whole situation. “Dude, what if we woke up and we were all hobos?” Jimmy asked with a serious face. We all laughed and the jokes continued. I have never been happier in my life to be alive then I was at that moment. A few weeks later we were all once again in Zack’s basement kitchen. “So I brought some numb chucks, I thought we could go find the hobo again. I will protect us.” Erin said as she started to twirl her black numb chucks above her head. “Um Erin, those are foam and couldn’t hurt a fly. And you would be the last person I would trust to save my life.” Jimmy said laughing to himself. “Whatever douche bag!” Erin said as the numb chucks flew out of her hand and hit Jimmy in the mouth. Jimmy’s hand instantly flew over his mouth. “Oh sorry I thought they couldn’t harm a fly.” Jimmy was now the joke of the night. After about a half hour our stomachs started to growl. We filled the car and went to Schnucks to get some food for dinner, passing the cemetery on the way. There was flashing red and blue lights coming from the cemetery with yellow crime scene tap blocking off the main entrance. “I hope the hobo didn’t die!” Zack said. We went into Schnucks and got to big frozen pizzas. As we were on our way home we noticed a big white crime unit van pulling out of the cemetery. We rushed home, threw the pizzas in the oven and flipped the TV on to channel two. The news wasn’t on so we thought nothing serious had happened. The next day I woke up from a mass text message saying that police had ironically found a dead body in the cemetery. None of us have ever put one foot into that cemetery since then.
Selected poem 1
Death
My eyes slowly close
My memory is fading
My heart stopped beating
Autumn Shanklin
Your picture is here
Your smell still lingers around
I want you back home
One bullet wasted
One extra hole in your head
Time to say goodbye
Selected poem 2
Life
A new shining light
Tears of joy fall to the ground
She is beautiful
The crying has begun
People start to surround me
Congratulations!
It’s a baby boy
Butterflies fill my stomach
I am excited
Selected Poem 3
Nature
Colors are changing
Autumn Shanklin
The ground crunches with each step
It is so perfect
The trees are naked
Frost starts to nibble my toes
Everything looks grey
New life is blooming
Animals come back to life
What a great season
Selected Poem 4
Goodbye
I miss you
Why did you leave?
I’m trying to make-do
I still grieve
I see you everywhere
I can still hear your voice
This isn’t fair
This wasn’t your choice
I can’t make it through the day
The days feel like years
Only you can make it okay
Autumn Shanklin
I’m drowning in tears
I wish you were here
So all this would disappear.
Selected Poem 5
Kevin Cody
Bright blue eyes,
It’s you I despise
For mastering perfection
Oh how I love your affection
You’re really funny
And taste like honey
You sweep me off my feet
And make my heart skip a beat
With you I never have to pay
You always brighten up my day
You make me really happy
This is getting to sappy
You’re my best friend and my boyfriend
It’s you I want here till the end
Short Story
Life or Death
Autumn Shanklin
“Peyton wake up! Wake up Peyton! It’s a snow day! Let’s go play in the snow!” Gabe
starts tugging on my blankets now.
“Gabe, let me sleep in for five more minutes please!” He storms out of my room and I try to fall
back asleep since this is the only day I get to sleep in. As soon as I start to doze back off I hear
the rumble of Jax’s pick-up truck pulling into my driveway.
“Peyton Jax is here!” My mom calls up from the stairway.
“Yeah I know send him up please!”
My dad opens the door for Jax, “How you doing Jax? Excited to have a day off school?”
“Oh you bet Mr. Stirckland! Is she still up in her room?”
“Yes she is you can go ahead up there.” My mom chimed in.
I hear him run up the stairs and open the door. His light brown, shaggy hair sneaks out from his
hat that reminds me a lot of a lumberjack. He’s wearing so many clothes it looks like he has
gained ten pounds since the last time I saw him.
“Hey baby, I thought I’d take you and Gabe sledding at the park today. How’s that
sound?” He kisses my forehead and sits on the foot of my bed.
“Yeah sounds good, let me get some warmer clothes on and I’ll be down in a minute.”
“Okay I’ll go down and make some moo-cha-cha for us.” Moo-cha-cha is something Jax’s
mom used to make for him when he was a child. All it really is is regular hot chocolate with a
hint of cinnamon. He walks out of my room and is greeted by Gabe.
Autumn Shanklin
“Did I hear the word sledding come out of your mouth Jax?!”
“You sure did buddy go get dressed and we will be on our way!”
“You’re the best!”
Gabe runs down the hall to change. I always admire how sweet Jax is, not just to me but to
Gabe and my parents. Gabe comes running down stairs jumping over the last two, “I’m ready!
Come on Peyton lets go!”
“Coming!” I shout back. Gabe can be such a pain sometimes but I really couldn’t ask for
a better little brother. Jax grabs the thermal of moo-cha-cha and we run out the door.
“Be careful, have fun and be home by two please we are going to see grandma and
grandpa! Love you guys!” Mom shouted after us.
“Yeah okay, we will. Love you too!”
And we were off! Jax’s truck plowed through the snow as a car does the rain. That’s one
of the reason i have always felt so safe and secure in his truck. As we were pulling up to the
park Gabe was getting so excited he was practically hyperventilating.
“Calm down lil man you’re gonna give yourself a heart attack”
“Sorry Jax, I’m just so excited! I love sledding!”
Gabe hopped out of the truck before Jax even had time to stop completely and put it in park.
We all grabbed some sleds out of the bed of the truck and sprinted to the top of the hill.
Autumn Shanklin
“Ready! Set! See ya!” Gabe shouted as he did a belly flop onto the sled and raced down
the hill.
“I’m coming for you!” I yelled after him.
We were having so much fun I didn’t realize it was already 2:30.
“Oh no! Jax we have to leave! My parents are going to kill me!” I look up and see my mom and
dad standing in the parking lot. “We gotta go Gabe come on!”
“Aw man I was having so much fun!”
“Oh stop whining, mom and dad are here.”
I turned to Jax, “Thanks baby, I had a great day. I love you. I’ll call you when I get home.”
“Anything for you guys, tell your grandparents I said hello. I love you sweetheart.”
I gave him a peck on the cheek and ran up the hill.
“I’m so sorry mom I had no idea it was so late.”
“Oh it’s fine honey your dad and I were cleaning up the house anyway.”
We piled into my dad’s little black Saturn, it’s not as secure feeling as Jax’s pick-up truck
but its defiantly cozier.
“So what type of music do we want to listen to today?” Dad asks this every time we get
in the car. He gets the same replies every time. I say country, Gabe says the Kidz Bop CD, mom
says classical and dad always wants rock-and-roll.
Autumn Shanklin
“We listened to Gabe’s CD last time, it’s my turn.”
“Fair enough, Country it is.”
I have always loved our little family trips especially out to my grandma and grandpas.
The highway is decorated with trees on both sides making it one of the prettiest places to drive
on. Today it looked especially pretty, snow covered the ground and icicles hung on the tree. I
was staring out the window, zoning everything out besides the music. There’s something about
music that makes everything seem more perfect. As I was staring out the window everything
started to spin. Suddenly there was more noise than just the music. Tires were screeching and
metal was crushing. Suddenly everything got silent. I sat there for a few moments trying to
gather my thoughts. I don’t know how any of this happened but I feel fine. I got up and was still
able to walk, I was on the side of the road but I wasn’t cold. I see a shoe and run towards it. It’s
a black penny loafer, size 10 and that’s when I realize it’s my dad’s.
“Dad?! Mom?! Gabe?! Where are you guys? Can you hear me?”
As I walk past where the shoe was I see drops of blood. This can’t be happening. As I walk
farther I can see a leg, hanging out from a ditch on the side of the road. It’s my dad. The virgin
snow is now stained red. At that point I know he is dead. I found my mom about 15 feet from
dad. Mom didn’t look bad; there was barely any blood around her but she’s not breathing.
“Mom? Wake up. You have to wake up mom. Please, I’m begging you, get up for me, get up for
Gabe.”
Autumn Shanklin
Now I’m starting to panic. Where is Gabe? I can’t find Gabe. I need to find Gabe! I walk back
toward the car and see a body on the other side of the road, the side that Gabe was sitting on.
“Gabe, I’m coming! Hang on buddy!”
I have to climb over several car parts to get to him. As soon as I get over there I see a pink scarf.
Gabe wasn’t wearing a pink scarf, I was. I stand over my own still body. How can this be? Am I
dead? I call Gabe’s name again and now I realize I can’t see my breath. This isn’t right. If I’m
dead how can I be standing here? All I know is that I’m not in my own body. Now the
ambulances are starting to arrive. The first ambulance pulled up and a short stubby paramedic
climbs out. He reaches my mom about the same time the second ambulance pulled up. The
short guy put a white tarp over my mom. The second guy jumped out of the ambulance and put
my dad in a bag.
“We got a live one over here!”
A few paramedics run over to my body. Did they just say I was alive? I don’t believe it, that’s not
possible they must have something wrong. They put my body on a stretcher and pushed it into
the ambulance. I climbed in after them and they shut the doors. I never did find Gabe I hope
he’s okay. I watch as they put a tube down my throat and attach a bubble to it.
“She’s in a stage eight coma. We need to get to the hospital now! Can you drive a little faster?”
“Getting into an accident ourselves won’t do her much good. I’ll get us there as fast as I can”
Autumn Shanklin
The ride is bumpy and I have no idea how they can possibly work on me under these conditions.
We reach the hospital and the doctors are there waiting for me. One paramedic climbsout and
greets the doctor.
“What’s the status?” the doctor asks.
“She’s in a stage eight coma.”
“And the other passengers?”
“Parents dead on the scene and a little boy about six or seven right behind us.”
That must be Gabe they are talking about. Oh thank god he must be alive. If he wasn’t alive he
wouldn’t be on his way to the hospital. They take me into a big room with about six doctors. A
really cute doctor grabs scissors and starts cutting my clothes off exposing my naked body. Now
I’m to embarrassed to watch. I turn around to try to leave. I know I can’t open the door but I
wonder if I can walk through it. I try and I hit the door. If I was in my body I’m sure it would
have hurt. I’m still not quite used to this whole ‘I’m not in my body’ situation. A nurse walks in
and I slip out through the door. I wonder if my grandparents know yet. How is Jax going to find
out? My mom and dad would have been the ones to call Jax if something would have happened
to me but they can’t. My grandparents don’t have his number. I walk through the halls hoping
to find someone like me, someone out of their body. Do I get the choice to live or die or is that
made up for me? There are so many questions I have to ask but no one to answer them. I see
my grandparents are in the waiting room now. I’ve never seen my grandpa cry before but he’s
Autumn Shanklin
crying like a new born baby. Something about seeing a grown man cry really changes things.
One of my doctors approaches my grandma.
“Hi, I’m Doctor Martin. I’m Peyton’s doctor. She is in a stage eight coma which means he
brain is swollen. We have her on a machine to breathe for her and an IV to keep her brain from
getting more swollen but unfortunately it will not make it any less swollen. We have done all
we can for her but the rest is up to her. There’s nothing more we can do for her. You can go see
whenever you would like. I think it helps the patient out a lot to hear from their loved ones.
And as far as Gabe goes he is suffering some internal bleeding and a collapsed lung. We took
him up to surgery and we will keep you updated.”
“Thank you doctor.”
My grandma and grandpa get up to come see me I assume. I follow behind them as they slowly
walk into my room. My grandpa looks at me and takes a step back toward the door.
“I can’t do this yet, I’ll give you some time alone with her” My grandpa says as he heads toward
the door.
My grandma sits down next to me and grabs my hand but I can’t feel it.
“Hey baby girl, its grandma. I’m so sorry you’re in this position. I wish I could take your
spot. You don’t deserve this. Gabe is in surgery, he might make it. Why do bad things happen to
good people? I love you but I’m not gonna ask you to stay. I want you to know that you can
leave if you want to, I wouldn’t blame you. But if you stay I promise I will help you with
anything I can.”
Autumn Shanklin
I wish I could talk to her. I wish I could squeeze her hand and tell her I love her too but I can’t. I
guess it really is my choice. Now I wish someone could make that choice for me. How can I live
without my parents? They mean the world to me. But I can’t just leave. I’m only 18, I have a
whole life ahead of me. And if Gabe makes it I can’t leave him alone. The door opens and Jax
walks in. He shakes my grandpa’s hand, gives my grandma a hug and asks for a second alone
with me. My grandma gets up and walks out of the room. Jax looks like a mess. For the year and
a half that we have been together I have never seen him like this. He sits down and pulls a small
box out of his coat pocket.
“I got this for you for Christmas, but under the circumstances I think you can have it a
little early.”
He opens the box to reveal beautiful diamond necklace. He wraps it around my neck and
sits back down.
“It looks just as beautiful as I thought it would.”
Then he lays a small pink bear under my arm. He takes a deep breath in as he tries to find the
words to say.
“Oh Peyton, I don’t know what I’d do without you. Please don’t leave me. I need you in my life.
You’re my everything. Remember our first date?”
I think back to how perfect our first date really was. Jax is the first guy I have ever really dated.
We met at school in second hour art class. He was new to the school sat in the corner by
himself. Usually I’m a really shy person but there was something about Jax that made me feel
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comfortable. When we got our first assignment he saw how bad I was at drawing and would
help me with my projects.
“So what are you doing this weekend?” he asked me one day.
“Just the usual, sit at home and relax.” I replied. I never really went out on the
weekends. I didn’t really have any friends; I kept to myself most of the time.
“Go out with me this Saturday.”
This caught me off guard. “Uh I’ll think about it”
“Okay so I’ll pick you up around seven. See you then!”
“Wait I never said y-“By the time I could finish he was already heading out the door. He
turned around and gave me a cute little smirk. He picked me up at seven on Saturday just as he
said he would. We went out to dinner at this small Italian restaurant. Then he took me to the
boardwalk and we rode some rides and played carnival games and that’s when he won me the
small pink bear. We took a walk on the beach of Lake Michigan. I know it’s cheesy and cliché
but it was the best night of my life. I never thought I would find someone like Jax.
“After that night I knew I would fall in love with you. I knew you were perfect.” I wish I
could feel him touching me, I wish I could feel his soft kiss one more time, and I wish I could tell
him that I’m right here, that I haven’t made my mind up but I’m still here and that I love him
but I can’t. This makes my decision so much harder. I know my parents would want me to stay
and live my life for them and make them proud but I don’t know how I can make it without
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them. But how can I possibly leave behind my grandma and grandpa and Jax. I wish I knew how
Gabe was doing. Just then my grandma walked back into the room.
“Gabe made it through surgery. He’s going to make it.”
Jax grabs my hand, “Did you hear that? Gabe is okay! You have to come back to us Peyton this
isn’t right he needs you, I need you, we all need you. Please don’t leave.”
I think about Gabe and how his life is going to be without us. I think he would like me to stay. I
wonder if Gabe had a choice. If Gabe can make his decision I think I can make mine. Suddenly I
can feel Jax’s hand on mine and I rub my thumb on the top of his hand. This is the first time
since the accident I can feel the pain of everything. My throat hurts, my head hurts, my back
hurts, everything hurts. Despite all the pain I think I made the right choice, at least I hope I did.
Short Story Polished
Life or Death
“Peyton wake up! Wake up Peyton! It’s a snow day! Let’s go play in the snow!” Gabe starts
tugging on my blankets now.
“Gabe, let me sleep in for five more minutes please!” He storms out of my room and I try to fall
back asleep since this is the only day I get to sleep in. As soon as I start to doze back off I hear
the rumble of Jax’s pick-up truck pulling into my driveway.
“Peyton Jax is here!” My mom calls up from the stairway.
“Yeah I know send him up please!”
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My dad opens the door for Jax, “How you doing Jax? Excited to have a day off school?”
“Oh you bet Mr. Stirckland! Is she still up in her room?”
“Yes she is you can go ahead up there.” My mom chimed in.
I hear him run up the stairs and open the door. His light brown, shaggy hair sneaks out from his
hat that reminds me a lot of a lumberjack. He’s wearing so many clothes it looks like he has
gained ten pounds since the last time I saw him.
“Hey baby, I thought I’d take you and Gabe sledding at the park today. How’s that sound?” He
kisses my forehead and sits on the foot of my bed.
“Yeah sounds good, let me get some warmer clothes on and I’ll be down in a minute.”
“Okay I’ll go down and make some moo-cha-cha for us.” Moo-cha-cha is something Jax’s mom
used to make for him when he was a child. All it really is is regular hot chocolate with a hint of
cinnamon. He walks out of my room and is greeted by Gabe.
“Did I hear the word sledding come out of your mouth Jax?!”
“You sure did buddy go get dressed and we will be on our way!”
“You’re the best!”
Gabe runs down the hall to change. I always admire how sweet Jax is, not just to me but to
Gabe and my parents. Gabe comes running down stairs jumping over the last two, “I’m ready!
Come on Peyton lets go!”
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“Coming!” I shout back. Gabe can be such a pain sometimes but I really couldn’t ask for a better
little brother. Jax grabs the thermal of moo-cha-cha and we run out the door.
“Be careful, have fun and be home by two please we are going to see grandma and grandpa!
Love you guys!” Mom shouted after us.
“Yeah okay, we will. Love you too!”
And we were off! Jax’s truck plowed through the snow as a car does the rain. That’s one of the
reason i have always felt so safe and secure in his truck. As we were pulling up to the park Gabe
was getting so excited he was practically hyperventilating.
“Calm down lil man you’re gonna give yourself a heart attack”
“Sorry Jax, I’m just so excited! I love sledding!”
Gabe hopped out of the truck before Jax even had time to stop completely and put it in park.
We all grabbed some sleds out of the bed of the truck and sprinted to the top of the hill.
“Ready! Set! See ya!” Gabe shouted as he did a belly flop onto the sled and raced down the hill.
“I’m coming for you!” I yelled after him.
We were having so much fun I didn’t realize it was already 2:30.
“Oh no! Jax we have to leave! My parents are going to kill me!” I look up and see my mom and
dad standing in the parking lot. “We gotta go Gabe come on!”
“Aw man I was having so much fun!”
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“Oh stop whining, mom and dad are here.”
I turned to Jax, “Thanks baby, I had a great day. I love you. I’ll call you when I get home.”
“Anything for you guys, tell your grandparents I said hello. I love you sweetheart.”
I gave him a peck on the cheek and ran up the hill.
“I’m so sorry mom I had no idea it was so late.”
“Oh it’s fine honey your dad and I were cleaning up the house anyway.”
We piled into my dad’s little black Saturn, it’s not as secure feeling as Jax’s pick-up truck
but its defiantly cozier.
“So what type of music do we want to listen to today?” Dad asks this every time we get in the
car. He gets the same replies every time. I say country, Gabe says the Kidz Bop CD, mom says
classical and dad always wants rock-and-roll.
“We listened to Gabe’s CD last time, it’s my turn.”
“Fair enough, Country it is.”
I have always loved our little family trips especially out to my grandma and grandpas. The
highway is decorated with trees on both sides making it one of the prettiest places to drive on.
Today it looked especially pretty, snow covered the ground and icicles hung on the tree. I was
staring out the window, zoning everything out besides the music. There’s something about
music that makes everything seem more perfect. As I was staring out the window everything
started to spin. Suddenly there was more noise than just the music. Tires were screeching and
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metal was crushing. Suddenly everything got silent. I sat there for a few moments trying to
gather my thoughts. I don’t know how any of this happened but I feel fine. I got up and was still
able to walk, I was on the side of the road but I wasn’t cold. I see a shoe and run towards it. It’s
a black penny loafer, size 10 and that’s when I realize it’s my dad’s.
“Dad?! Mom?! Gabe?! Where are you guys? Can you hear me?”
As I walk past where the shoe was I see drops of blood. This can’t be happening. As I walk
farther I can see a leg, hanging out from a ditch on the side of the road. It’s my dad. The virgin
snow is now stained red. At that point I know he is dead. I found my mom about 15 feet from
dad. Mom didn’t look bad; there was barely any blood around her but she’s not breathing.
“Mom? Wake up. You have to wake up mom. Please, I’m begging you, get up for me, get up for
Gabe.”
Now I’m starting to panic. Where is Gabe? I can’t find Gabe. I need to find Gabe! I walk back
toward the car and see a body on the other side of the road, the side that Gabe was sitting on.
“Gabe, I’m coming! Hang on buddy!”
I have to climb over several car parts to get to him. As soon as I get over there I see a pink scarf.
Gabe wasn’t wearing a pink scarf, I was. I stand over my own still body. How can this be? Am I
dead? I call Gabe’s name again and now I realize I can’t see my breath. This isn’t right. If I’m
dead how can I be standing here? All I know is that I’m not in my own body. Now the
ambulances are starting to arrive. The first ambulance pulled up and a short stubby paramedic
climbs out. He reaches my mom about the same time the second ambulance pulled up. The
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short guy put a white tarp over my mom. The second guy jumped out of the ambulance and put
my dad in a bag.
“We got a live one over here!”
A few paramedics run over to my body. Did they just say I was alive? I don’t believe it, that’s not
possible they must have something wrong. They put my body on a stretcher and pushed it into
the ambulance. I climbed in after them and they shut the doors. I never did find Gabe I hope
he’s okay. I watch as they put a tube down my throat and attach a bubble to it.
“She’s in a stage eight coma. We need to get to the hospital now! Can you drive a little faster?”
“Getting into an accident ourselves won’t do her much good. I’ll get us there as fast as I can”
The ride is bumpy and I have no idea how they can possibly work on me under these conditions.
We reach the hospital and the doctors are there waiting for me. One paramedic climbs out and
greets the doctor.
“What’s the status?” the doctor asks.
“She’s in a stage eight coma.”
“And the other passengers?”
“Parents dead on the scene and a little boy about six or seven right behind us.”
That must be Gabe they are talking about. Oh thank god he must be alive. If he wasn’t alive he
wouldn’t be on his way to the hospital. They take me into a big room with about six doctors. A
really cute doctor grabs scissors and starts cutting my clothes off exposing my naked body. Now
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I’m too embarrassed to watch. I turn around to try to leave. I know I can’t open the door but I
wonder if I can walk through it. I try and I hit the door. If I was in my body I’m sure it would
have hurt. I’m still not quite used to this whole ‘I’m not in my body’ situation. A nurse walks in
and I slip out through the door. I wonder if my grandparents know yet. How is Jax going to find
out? My mom and dad would have been the ones to call Jax if something would have happened
to me but they can’t. My grandparents don’t have his number. I walk through the halls hoping
to find someone like me, someone out of their body. Do I get the choice to live or die or is that
made up for me? There are so many questions I have to ask but no one to answer them. I see
my grandparents are in the waiting room now. I’ve never seen my grandpa cry before but he’s
crying like a new born baby. Something about seeing a grown man cry really changes things.
One of my doctors approaches my grandma.
“Hi, I’m Doctor Martin. I’m Peyton’s doctor. She is in a stage eight coma which means he brain
is swollen. We have her on a machine to breathe for her and an IV to keep her brain from
getting more swollen but unfortunately it will not make it any less swollen. We have done all
we can for her but the rest is up to her. There’s nothing more we can do for her. You can go see
whenever you would like. I think it helps the patient out a lot to hear from their loved ones.
And as far as Gabe goes he is suffering some internal bleeding and a collapsed lung. We took
him up to surgery and we will keep you updated.”
“Thank you doctor.”
My grandma and grandpa get up to come see me I assume. I follow behind them as they slowly
walk into my room. My grandpa looks at me and takes a step back toward the door.
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“I can’t do this yet, I’ll give you some time alone with her” My grandpa says as he heads toward
the door.
My grandma sits down next to me and grabs my hand but I can’t feel it.
“Hey baby girl, its grandma. I’m so sorry you’re in this position. I wish I could take your
spot. You don’t deserve this. Gabe is in surgery, he might make it. Why do bad things happen to
good people? I love you but I’m not gonna ask you to stay. I want you to know that you can
leave if you want to, I wouldn’t blame you. But if you stay I promise I will help you with
anything I can.”
I wish I could talk to her. I wish I could squeeze her hand and tell her I love her too but I can’t. I
wish I was able to talk to her this would make my decision a lot easier. She could help me and
weigh out the pros and cons with me like she used to do when I was little. I guess it really is my
choice. Now I wish someone could make that choice for me. How can I live without my parents?
They mean the world to me. Sure, I have Jax and my grandparents but they can’t and never will
compare to my parents. I know if I stay I will want my parents around all the time. I’ll have no
one to walk me down the aisle when I get married, my kids will never get to meet their
grandparents, who will I go to when I need advice, sure my grandma could give me advice but
it’s nothing like my moms. As much as it hurts to say I know my grandparents won’t be ehre
forever. They are getting old. Once they are gone I’ll be on my own, taking care of Gabe by
myself. But I can’t just leave. I’m only 18, I have a whole life ahead of me. And if Gabe makes it
I can’t leave him alone. The door opens and Jax walks in. He shakes my grandpa’s hand, gives
my grandma a hug and asks for a second alone with me. My grandma gets up and walks out of
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the room. Jax looks like a mess. For the year and a half that we have been together I have never
seen him like this. He sits down and pulls a small box out of his coat pocket.
“I got this for you for Christmas, but under the circumstances I think you can have it a
little early.”
He opens the box to reveal beautiful diamond necklace. He wraps it around my neck and
sits back down.
“It looks just as beautiful as I thought it would.”
Then he lays a small pink bear under my arm. He takes a deep breath in as he tries to find the
words to say.
“Oh Peyton, I don’t know what I’d do without you. Please don’t leave me. I need you in my life.
You’re my everything. Remember our first date?”
I think back to how perfect our first date really was. Jax is the first guy I have ever really dated.
We met at school in second hour art class. He was new to the school sat in the corner by
himself. Usually I’m a really shy person but there was something about Jax that made me feel
comfortable. When we got our first assignment he saw how bad I was at drawing and would
help me with my projects.
“So what are you doing this weekend?” he asked me one day.
“Just the usual, sit at home and relax.” I replied. I never really went out on the weekends. I
didn’t really have any friends; I kept to myself most of the time.
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“Go out with me this Saturday.”
This caught me off guard. “Uh I’ll think about it”
“Okay so I’ll pick you up around seven. See you then!”
“Wait I never said y-“By the time I could finish he was already heading out the door. He turned
around and gave me a cute little smirk. He picked me up at seven on Saturday just as he said he
would. We went out to dinner at this small Italian restaurant. Then he took me to the
boardwalk and we rode some rides and played carnival games and that’s when he won me the
small pink bear. We took a walk on the beach of Lake Michigan. I know it’s cheesy and cliché
but it was the best night of my life. I never thought I would find someone like Jax.
“After that night I knew I would fall in love with you. I knew you were perfect.” I wish I could
feel him touching me, I wish I could feel his soft kiss one more time, and I wish I could tell him
that I’m right here, that I haven’t made my mind up but I’m still here and that I love him but I
can’t. This makes my decision so much harder. I know my parents would want me to stay and
live my life for them and make them proud but I don’t know how I can make it without them.
But how can I possibly leave behind my grandma and grandpa and Jax. I wish I knew how Gabe
was doing. Just then my grandma walked back into the room.
“Gabe made it through surgery. He’s going to make it.”
Jax grabs my hand, “Did you hear that? Gabe is okay! You have to come back to us Peyton this
isn’t right he needs you, I need you, we all need you. Please don’t leave.”
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I think about Gabe and how his life is going to be without us. I think he would like me to stay. I
wonder if Gabe had a choice. If Gabe can make his decision I think I can make mine. Suddenly I
can feel Jax’s hand on mine and I rub my thumb on the top of his hand. This is the first time
since the accident I can feel the pain of everything. My throat hurts, my head hurts, my back
hurts, everything hurts. Despite all the pain I think I made the right choice, at least I hope I did.
Original Work
Dear Future Self,
I hope that within the six years that have passed, you have finished college and have
started to teach an English class at a local high school. I hope by this time you have a wonderful
husband, a nice house, a baby boy on the way, and a little tea cup pig named Bosco. You will
probably end up naming your son Jayden Scott or Lucas Scott (You’ve liked those names for a
long time now.) Erin Bouvatte is hopefully going to be the god mother like you guys used to talk
about all the time. I really wish that mom is still around to see the birth of her grandson. Right
now the old you is sitting in Mr.Kozak’s class working on your final project. Lydia McCurren is in
here too. Are you still friends with her? I sure hope so, she was always really nice. Well class is
almost over so I will be seeing you in six years. Good luck, I hope you accomplish everything you
want to.
Sincerely,
The 16 year old you.
Autumn Shanklin