ass of the world
TRANSCRIPT
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8/4/2019 ASS of the World
1/2
Wire from 'The Ministry of Squatting' to The PeopleIssue #1 August 2011
Betrayal!
ASS were shocked and appalled to
discover that a former member
started a property guardian
business, Dot Dot Dot Property.
Shit, insecure housing for 50
quid a week with 2 weeks
notice, CV, references,
credit checks and ID? NO
THANKS!! Bollocks to
all anti-squat scams.
DISCLAIMER: no phones were
harmed in the discovery of this
greedy, heart-breaking betrayal.
FREE!
M
AKING-SHIT-UP
SHOCKER!
Weve recently been
shocked and
appalled by the
attacks on
squatting in the
mainstream
gutterpress. The Daily
Mail has of course been at
the forefront of the attacks
claiming that ASS is a squatters
estate agent, that squatters
occupy peoples
homes, and
other lies.
e
ly Jail
t a spy to the
S office, a young
pretending to be
r and homeless. ASS
d to help her out,
n the paper went
wrote a load of
p about them. It
s upsetting. Her
me is Emma
nkin. Watch out
her!
The Daily
Telegraph and
ning Standard
e also been
king stuff up,
slagging off
atters. ASS sent
tter to the Standard
esponse, but nobody
ld be bothered to read it to
if it was printed.
ASS is
constantly
being
inundated by
the media asking
questions. Being
there to advise
homeless people
they rarely have
the time or energy
to respond. The
office is really
busy at the
moment and
they could
really do
with more
volunteers.
espionage
pestering
ndwagon
Squa
tting
:
a'p
robl
em'
the run up to the royal
ce/wedding the police got
gy and started looking forminals in the most unlikely
places. Ratstar, Offmarket
d Grow Heathrow were all
ded by the
ice. They
nt find their
archist
nspiracy, but
y did cause a
of trouble
d mess.
Squatted house in
London also fellvictim of a police
attack. The house
was evicted at
4am by an
estimated 70
TSGs. The 3
sleeping,
naked
people inside
were honoured by
the extravagance,
(as well as
shocked and
appalled).
e boys in
e are stillto their old
mes,
asionally
wing up
ing that
yll arrest squatters for criminal damage
d abstracting electricity unless they leave.
metimes theyre badly behaved enough to
rit a complaint, but the paperwork is too much
ollow up for both squatters and ASS.
LAW & OUT-OF-ORDER
DONT PANICSo everyone is talking about the Ban on
Squatting!!! When, how, what, WHEN?? Well,
dont panic just yet...heres a little summary
of whats going on at the moment: Right now
the law on squatting is still the same, but since
coming into power, the Tories have been
seriously talking about changing it. They do
this a lot. Last time, in 1992, the result was a
new court case, the dreaded IPO which
arrived in 1995. This time the government are
saying that they want to do something aboutsquatting by 2012.
LAP-DOGSThe main culprit is the Tory Housing Minister
Grant Shapps who has been crying wolf over
supposed cases of people's homes being
squatted. Smelling blood, the press-pack
hyenas rallied round in a sensationalist
feeding frenzy. Schnaps has also gone and
made a squat-repellent guide for homeowners.
It's full of crap, but has encouraged landlords
and their bloodsucking lawyers to go for IPOs.
TOILET PAPER
More recently the Ministry of Justice [sic]released its consultation paper, a long
document full of dodgy statistics and
misleading terms. It outlines five possible
options for dealing with squatting - making
squatting a criminal offense; extending PIO
& DROs to non-residential premises;
repealing or amending Section 6; increasing
enforcement of existing offenses (eg. criminal
damage); or doing nothing. The idea is for
people and organisations to express their
opinions about these options and their
possible effects. The end date for responses
is 5th October.
FIGHT-BACKSo what are we going to do about it? In
London theres been regular gatherings
under the name Squattastic to respond to
state and media attacks, and it looks like
SQUASH (Squatters Action for Secure
Homes) has been resurrected after 16
years. Brighton have another new network
going and theres plenty of activity out in
Bristol. ASS are planning to respond to the
consultation and call on any potentially
sympathetic organisations to do so as well.
SQUASH put together a guide for responding to
the consultation. You can read it at:
http://tinyurl.com/squashguide
Bean
ministarrr for years
why didnt nobody tell
me about this Ministry of
Squatting?! I'm shocked
and appalled.Grant Shapps
Housing Minister
xtra-curricular Yawn raid!
Routine
ocedure
GOVERNMENT RELEASESCONSULTATION PAPERS
A S
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8/4/2019 ASS of the World
2/2ASSNEEDSYOU!
Advisory Service for Squatters
Open: Mon-Fri 2-6pm
Tel: 020 3216 0099
Angel Alley
84b Whitechapel High St
London E1 7QX
http://www.squatter.org.uk
em
p
loym
entop
portunitie
s
OFFICE STAFF REQUIRED
ASS office is as busy as ever and we're looking for
more volunteers to speak to those coming in
and calling. It will land you:
Join the ASS
archiving team!
Were a small group
trying to digitalise
the old ASS files.
We are there most
Thursdays from 6pm.
Email to check on:[email protected]
LIKE TO KEEP SOME
ORDER WHILST
EVERYTHING AROUND IS
CRASHING
DOWN???
DON'T
WANT
ANOFF
ICEJOB?
!
!speaklang
uages?
like
filin
g?
No
need
tom
ove
dirt!
give us a shout or join
can
design
fl
y
ers?
put
on
bene
fit
gig
s?
think
theres
othe
r way
s you
can
help?
ASS would like to thank
their recent sponsors:
OKasional Cafe in Manchester
The Bristol Squatters
& all those making regular contributions
No need to be a legal eagle
we will train you.
To start, just drop by the office
and say hello.
+100% more confidencewhen THEY come to your front door
+20 new friends each month
+300 points squat cred
FINE-SSTHE YEAR IN FINANCE
The footsie went up and then major share
holder dividends went down or something. It
aused chaos. Gold was thrown out the
window and melted down to make a statue of
he king.
* * *
Another thing happened: Traders all over the
city were shocked and appalled, and
hopefully threw themselves from buildings to
escape the crisis. We've got no idea what's
going on" is a quote from one bulbous
banker, screamed as he sped past the
window. All the shares cost 20p whereas
yesterday it was 1. Bla bla bla boring
nonsense...
in realnews: ASS SPENDS
MORE MONEY THAN IT GETS
Last year the ASS spent 6156 and only
got 2730. They had enough to cover the
difference, but obviously cant go on like
his forever.
Rent's expensive, you know..."
They spent most on rent
!) so that people havean office to work in,
and on the phone bill.
They also had to buy
ome very expensive
egal books (mainly
he Housing Law
Encyclopaedia).
We need more cash!"
f you have ever wanted
o put on a benefit for them, now is the
ime. Maybe you were recently successful
n suing The Pigs? Maybe youve just got
bags of cash lying around? Donations will
be accepted with gratitude!
Upcoming training days
4th September 2nd Octoberwriting defenses homelessness law
SS of the World issue #1 page 2