positive discipline

DISCIPLINE

NOT PUNISHMENT

An Introduction to Corporal

Punishment and Positive Punishment and Positive

Discipline

Discipline and Punishment

____________________________

Is there a difference?

DISCIPLINE DISCIPLINE

Discere - to learn

Discipere - to comprehend

PUNISHMENTPUNISHMENT

Punire - to inflict a penalty on, or cause pain for some comprehend

Discipere - to teach

pain for some offense

DisciplineDiscipline aims to teach,

mentor, guide, help learn…

Role of the “teacher” or “mentor” is to explain well and demonstrate/ model good behaviorbehavior

Discipline is part of child rearing and is not limited to situations when there is a mistake or offence

Punishment

Penalty for doing something wrong

Controlling or “correcting mistakes through the use of painof pain

Teaching a (painful) “lesson” so that the mistake will not be repeated

Rosselle Arenas, 14

San Pedro, Laguna

What is Corporal Punishment?What is Corporal Punishment?

Punishment or penalty for an offence – imagined or real.

It involves the use of force, power, authority or intimidation to inflict some pain or discomfort on the child for purposes of training or control. the child for purposes of training or control.

It is usually administered by an adult who has the authority or responsibility for looking after or caring for the child.

It has two forms – physical and emotional/ humiliating or degrading punishment.

What is Corporal Punishment?What is Corporal Punishment?

Hitting children with the hand or with an implement

Kicking, shaking or throwing Kicking, shaking or throwing objects at children, scratching, pinching, burning, scalding or forcing them to ingest substances

What is Corporal Punishment?What is Corporal Punishment?

Using power, authority or threats to force children to perform physically painful or damaging acts, e.g. holding weights for e.g. holding weights for an extended period, kneeling on pebbles, squatting, asking them to stand under the heat of the sun, etc.

What is Corporal Punishment?What is Corporal Punishment?

ThreatsShamingCursingVerbal assault

Emotional or humiliating Emotional or humiliating punishment: degrades, belittles, humiliates, denigrates, threatens, scares or ridicules the child.

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

Of the many forms of

violence that a majority of children experience, corporal punishment is the:

Most common, Most common,

Most pervasive and yet

Least reported and

Least recognised as a form of violence. Jan Christian Chu, 7

Mandaluyong City

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

It is widespread - cutting across cultures, geography and social class…

80-98% of the world’s children experience physical punishment in their homes, with a physical punishment in their homes, with a third more experiencing severe physical punishment with the use of implements. (World

Report on Violence against Children 2006)

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

85% of Filipino children said they are punished in the home

82% said they were hit on different parts of their body; of this number, 65% body; of this number, 65% reported that spanking is the most common form of punishment they experienced. (Save the Children Sweden 2005)

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

It is hurting children.

In the short term, corporal punishment “…kills thousands of children each year and injures and handicaps many more.”

“In the longer term…it [is] a significant factor “In the longer term…it [is] a significant factor in the development of violent behavior, and it is associated with other problems in childhood and later life.” (WHO’s World Report on Violence and Health

2002)

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

Children want it to stop.

Children all over the world say they do not want to be hurt, and that they wish there are other ways of disciplining them.

Filipino children say they will learn better if their parents and teachers: (1) Talk to them in a calm and parents and teachers: (1) Talk to them in a calm and understanding way; (2) Explain to them what they have done wrong or how they should do things the right way; and (3) Make them feel that they are still loved and accepted.

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

It has harmful effects on children.

It can cause serious physical and psychological harm to children.

Injury, disability, even death

Fear, anger, anxiety

Low self-esteemLow self-esteem

Displaced anger and aggression

Rebelliousness and resentment

Depression or intense loneliness

Weak decision-making skills and self-control

Why End Corporal Punishment?Why End Corporal Punishment?

It has harmful effects on families and cultures.

It damages a child’s relationship with his/her parents/adults.

It perpetuates a culture of violence.

Why End Corporal Why End Corporal Punishment?Punishment?

It violates children’s rights.

States have the obligation to fulfill the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child (UNCRC). Child (UNCRC).

Say NO to corporal punishment

Positive DisciplinePositive Discipline

DISCIPLINE = TEACHINGDISCIPLINE = TEACHINGPositive discipline is part of an education process, a way of thinking and an approach to teaching that:

Helps children develop appropriate thinking and behavior in the short and long-term.short and long-term.

Helps children develop self-discipline and confidence.

Guides children to be in harmonywith self and others.

Positive discipline is not…Positive discipline is not…

Permissive parenting

An absence of rules,

limits or expectations

Short-term reactions or

alternative punishments

to slapping or hitting

Positive Discipline and Children’s RightsPositive Discipline and Children’s Rights

Respect for the human dignity and physical integrity of children

Recognition of children’s capacities and their right to capacities and their right to participate

Ensuring children’s best interests at all times

Positive Discipline PrinciplesPositive Discipline Principles

Positive & healthyrelationship

Supportive learning environment

Problem-Solving

Long-term goals

relationship(Warmth)

environment(Structure)

Understanding how children think and feel

Planning

• Long-term goals

What kind of people do we want our What kind of people do we want our

children to become?children to become?

Respectful & has

empathy for others

Can make wise

decisions

Disciplined &

responsible

Goal-directeddecisions

Able to form healthy

relationships

Confident & has a

solid self-esteem

Analytical

Life-long learner

Honest

Has faith

What can we do?What can we do?

Reflect on the values and life skills we want to

teach children

Make day-to-day problem situations an occasion

for teaching these values and life skillsfor teaching these values and life skills

Model these values and life skills (respect, taking

responsibility, wisdom, handling conflict,

empathy) to children

Knowledge

• Long-term goalsLong-term goals

• Long-term goalsLong-term goals

• Long-term goalsLong-term goals

Long-term goals

Understanding how children think and feel

Understanding How Children

Think and Feel

Children at different ages

need different kinds of

support and information.

Children’s developmental Children’s developmental

stage and other extenal

factors affect how they

think, feel and behave.

Tools for Understanding How Children

Think and Feel

Typical development

Empathy

Observation

ListeningListening

Specific context or

situation

Typical Development

Pre-adolescent period

Start of physical and hormonal changes at

puberty

Establishing independenceEstablishing independence

Forming opinions about parents/authority

figures and about what is going on around them

Pre-adolescent period

• Continue building trust by listening to the child’s stories

• Letting the child express his/her emotions and teaching him/her how to manage these

The Role of the Adult

teaching him/her how to manage these

• Show that you accept the child even if he/she has made a mistake

• Continue to help the child see the consequences of his/her negative action

Typical Development

Adolescence

Establishing identity

Setting long-term goals for oneself

Challenging authorityChallenging authority

Establishing intimate relationships

The Role of the Adult

Adolescence

Respectful monitoring of activities

Engaging the adolescent in discussions about

identity, intimate relationships and risky

behaviours

Listening to and respecting the child’s opinion

Be firm and consistent about non-negotiables

Understanding TemperamentUnderstanding Temperament

Temperament – child’s specific way of interacting/reacting to the environment

Dimensions – activity level, regularity, response to new situations, adaptability, distractability, persistence, intensitypersistence, intensity

Important for parents to recognise similarities and differences between one’s own and the child’s temperament to be able to identify the child’s specific needs and the appropriate responses.

Specific context: living on the street

Lack of adult support and structure

The child becomes street smart

Experience of violence in the streets

Need to build trust

Gently reintroduce structureGently reintroduce structure

Teach non-violence in conflict resolution

Redirect behaviour toward positive goals

Specific context: child abuse

Low of self-esteem

Difficulty in making friends; shyness

Aggression

Need to rebuild trust

Consistency in providing structure

Specific context: the working child

Need for support to manage the demands of work and school that creates pressure on the child

Need for protection: check conditions of work

Listen to the child’s stories/observe physical and Listen to the child’s stories/observe physical and emotional changes

Respect: giving the child his/her share of income

Specific context:

the child in conflict with the law

Rebuild trust by listening to the child’s opinions

Rebuild respect by challenging negative notions

but also recognising good ideas

Help the child understand the long-term Help the child understand the long-term

consequences of his/her actions on self and

others

Understanding How Children Think and Feel

ToolsTools

Positive & healthyrelationship

(Warmth)

Supportive learning environment(Structure)

Long-term goals

Understanding how children think and feel

A Positive and Healthy Relationship with A Positive and Healthy Relationship with

ChildrenChildren

Children learn best

when they feel

respected, understood,

trusted, safe and trusted, safe and

loved.

We can demonstrate respect and empathy by…We can demonstrate respect and empathy by…

Showing children that they are still respected and accepted even when they do something wrong or when they commit mistakes

Listening to them

Looking at their situation from their point of view

Laughing with them

Supporting them when they are facing challenges

Encouraging them when they have to do something difficult

Telling them that they believe in them

Recognizing their efforts and successes

Showing them that they trust them

Creating a Supportive Creating a Supportive Learning EnvironmentLearning Environment

A supportive

environment provides

children with

appropriate

information and information and

guidance to facilitate

learning, decision-

making and problem

solving.

We can build a supportive learning We can build a supportive learning

environment by…environment by…

Explaining the reasons for rules

Helping them find ways to fix their mistakes in a

way that helps them learn

Teaching them about the effects of their actions Teaching them about the effects of their actions

on other people

Being fair and consistent

Controlling anger; manage frustration and anger

in a healthy way

SkillsSkills

Positive & healthyrelationship

(Warmth)

Supportive learning environment(Structure)

Problem-Solving

Long-term goals

(Warmth) (Structure)

Understanding how children think and feel

ProblemProblem--SolvingSolvingRemember your long-term goals

Think before you act. Transform the challenging

situation into a constructive learning event for both the

child and the teacher. Most actions that adults

oftentimes label as “misbehaviors” are but a natural

part of children’s development and should not be seen

as threats to adults’ authority. It is therefore helpful to

think ahead, anticipate problems that may arise, and

plan a response.

Positive discipline…Positive discipline…

Is about finding long-term solutions to everyday parenting challenges that will develop a child’s self-discipline

Involves building mutually respectful relationships with children, clearly communicating expectations, rules and limits; and increasing children’s competence and limits; and increasing children’s competence and confidence to handle challenging situations

Is all about teaching life-long skills among children and at the same time respecting their rights as human beings.

Positive discipline…Positive discipline…

Is about finding long-term solutions to everyday parenting challenges that will develop a child’s self-disciplineInvolves building mutually respectful

relationships with children, clearly communicating expectations, rules and limits; and increasing children’s competence and and increasing children’s competence and confidence to handle challenging situationsIs all about teaching life-long skills among

children and at the same time respecting their rights as human beings.

Using positive discipline is Using positive discipline is a process. a process. a process. a process.

It will take time and needs It will take time and needs family support.family support.

Let us support Anti-Corporal

Punishment Bill!

Let us END Corporal

Punishment on Children

Now!