non violent communication and agile: individuals and interactions over processes and tools

Flowers for my table over air for

my lungs

Non violentcommunication:

Renee Troughton

Individuals and interactions…

What I want in my life is compassion, a flow between myself and others based on a mutual giving from the heart.

“

“

Dr Marshall Rosenberg, Founder of

NVC

What Is Non Violent Communication (NVC)?

What Is Non Violent Communication (NVC)?

Jackals

He’s a good sonI’m late

because I got stuck in

traffic

If you eat all your dinner

than you can get dessert

Giraffes

A jackal is just a giraffe with a language

problem

Observation

Feeling

Need

Request

What is an observation ?

What is a feeling?

What is a feeling?AfraidApprehensiveFrightenedPanickedPetrifiedSuspiciousTerrifiedWaryWorried

AnnoyedExasperatedFrustratedImpatientIrritated

AngryFuriousIndignantOutragedResentful

AversionAppalledContemptDisgustedHateHorrifiedRepulsed

ConfusedAmbivalentHesitantLostPerplexedPuzzledTorn

DisconnectedApatheticBoredColdDetachedDistractedNumbUninterested

DisquietAgitatedAlarmedDiscombobulatedDisturbedRattledShockedSurprisedTroubledTurbulentUncomfortableUneasyUnnervedUnsettledUpset

EmbarrassedAshamedGuiltyMortifiedSelf-conscious

FatigueDepletedExhaustedLethargicSleepyweary

PainAgonyDevastatedGriefHeartbrokenHurtLonelyMiserableRemorseful

SadDepressedDespairDisappointedDiscouragedHopelessUnhappy

TenseAnxiousCrankyDistressedEdgyIrritableNervousOverwhelmed

VulnerableFragileHelplessInsecureSensitiveShaky

YearningJealousWistful

What is a need?AutonomyChoice of goalsChoice of planFreedomIndependenceIntegrityPresenceSpaceSpontaneity

CelebrationCreation of lifeDreams fulfilledLosses

IntegrityAuthenticityCreativityMeaningSelf-worth

InterdependenceAcceptanceAffection

InterdependenceAppreciationAwarenessBelongingClosenessCommunityCompanionshipCompassionConsiderationConnectionCooperationContributionEmotional safetyEmpathyEqualityHonestyInclusionLoveMutualityReassuranceRespectSupportTrustUnderstandingWarmth

MeaningAwarenessClarityCompetenceConsciousnessContributionCreativityEfficacyEffectivenessGrowthHopeLearningTo MatterMourningParticipationPurposeSelf ExpressionUnderstanding

Rest & PlayChallengeMasteryEaseEnjoymentFunJoyHumourLaughterLearningRelaxationSponteneityStimulation

Safety & HealthPhysical safetyEmotional safetySecurityStabilityPredictabilitySupport

SpiritualBeautyCommunionHarmonyInspirationOrderPeace

NurtureAirFoodExerciseNurturingProtectionRestSafetySexualShelterTouchWarmthWater

What is a request?

“Would you be willing to…”

What is a request?

What is a request?“Our conflicts arise not because we have

different needs but because we have different strategies for how to meet them.”

Expressing NVC

When I see* (observation),I’m (feeling)

Because I want (need).Would you be willing to (request)?

Receiving NVC

When you see* (observation),do you feel (feeling)

Because you are needing (need).Would you like (action)?

Want more?

Shari Ellefullyalive.com.au

Creating empathetic connections, Connecting with our self,

Appreciation/praise, protective force… and more

Questions?

unbounddna.com

theagilerevolution.com

agileforest.com

renee@unbounddna.com

@agilerenee

Renee Troughton

leanpub.com\AgileForest

Connecting with my

REQUEST

Connecting with my

NEED

Connecting with my

FEELING

Connecting with my

OBSERVATION

Listening to my

JACKAL

EXPRESSING

SENSING

RECEIVING