life works, character counts and the friends of the blake library present teen talk speaker: susan...

Life Works, Character Countsand the Friends of the Blake Library Present

Teen Talk

Speaker: Susan Dockerill Founder of Life Works Parenting Tools

Teen TalkRelationship

Communication

New Direction

RELATIONSHIP

Nothing Works if the Relationship doesn’t work.

POWER

Power Over Blame Others Angry

Power Under Blame Self Guilt/Permissive

Personal Power Take 100% Responsibility

Empowered

In Control of Your Life

FEAR

FalseEvidenceAppearingReal

ACTA Way of behaving when things don’t

go your way.

3 to 5 years old

PAST Being right Attitude It’s not my fault Fighting Anger Out of Control

Blame No Responsibility Life’s Unfair Lying No trust I didn’t do it Fear Anxiety Depression Arguments Hurt I hate you!

Feeling Stoppers Moralize Lecture Humiliate Interrupt Calling names ignoring

Punishing Sarcasm Comparing to others Rescuing Assuming Making her feel guilty

If nothing changes the future will resemble the past.

Default Future

Past NOW Future

RELATIONSHIP Re-Establish The Relationship Focus on what you want to have happen in the

relationship. Clean up your part in why the relationship

doesn’t work What are you attached to? What are you committed to?

Feeling Encouragers

Listen Intently “What Else” Be Curious “Tell me some more” Then what

happened?” Validate Feelings “ I can see you are really

upset about this” Empathy “If I were you I’d feel the same way”

Communication How People Perform Correlates to how the

situation occurs to them. How a situation occurs includes your view of

the past (Why things are the way they are) and the future (where all this is going)

Our actions relate to how the world occurs to us, not to the way it actually is.

If nothing changes the future will resemble the past.

Default Future

Past NOW Future

RACKETS Complaint Act Pay Off Cost

Attatatchments Cell Phone IPOD Computer MY SPACE Being popular Not looking stupid Grades Computer

TV Sex Clothes Weight Sports Friends Skateboarding Drugs and Drinking

What will happen if nothing changes?

If nothing changes the future will resemble the past.

Default Future

Past NOW Future

Learn How To Live Powerfully and Love the Life You Live!

Redirecting Children/Teen Behavior

RCB BOOK and Workbook 5 Thursday Evenings 7:00 9:00pm May 21, 28 June 4,11,18

NOW

WORD

What if you could learn how to communicate in a way…

TouchMove Inspire

Attatatchments Cell Phone IPOD Computer MY SPACE Being popular Not looking stupid Grades Computer

TV Sex Clothes Weight Sports Friends Skateboarding Drugs and Drinking

Word +Action = New Possibilities

Invented Future

Past NOW Future

NOW

WORD

Commitment

Peace in your home

Love Forgiving Taking Care of Yourself Friendship Financial Freedom Mutual Respect

Happiness Listening Love Caring Keeping your word Living your dream Responsibility

RELATIONSHIP Re-Establish The Relationship Focus on what you want to have happen in the

relationship. Clean up your part in why the relationship

doesn’t work What are you attached to? What are you committed to?

TeensUniteUSA.COM New Possibility Website Connecting Teens to Careers Volunteer hours Peer Teen Coaching Teen Tutoring

NEW POSSIBILITES What is possible for you after tonight’s

seminar?

What are you committed to?

What action will you take to keep this going?