conscious parenting

Conscious parentingConscious parentingBy Formative AgeBy Formative Age

Introduction

• The first 2 yrs of life are very important for the development of the child>

• Learning the right answers may get a child through school but learning how to become a life long independent learner will take the child anywhere.

• So are we as parents going to entrust this important job to the school, teachers or are we going to partnership with them

Philosophy of “The Montessori Method”

• The Montessori Method was started by Dr. Maria Montessori.

• Dr. Montessori taught us to look at each child as a unique being.

• Each child is born with a predetermined pattern of unique potentials.

Philosophy cont.

• Children carry within themselves a key to their own development

• Hence education must march to the tune of their development.

• Environment helps this process.

Creating Just The Right Environment

• Engaging Cooperation• Encouraging Independence• Freedom Within limits• Rewards• Punishments• Praise• Role Modeling

Activity

Take a few mins to think about what it is that you insist your children do or don’t do during a typical day.

Commonly used methods to get children to cooperate

• Blaming and accusing.• Threats.• Commands.• Lecturing• Warning• Comparison• Sarcasm

5 Skills

Helps create a climate of respect in which the spirit of cooperation can begin to grow.

• Describe• Give information• Say it with a word• Talk about your feelings• Write a note

Describe

Picture from “How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk”

Give Information

Picture from “How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk”

Say it with a word

Picture from “How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk”

Talk about your feelings

Picture from “How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk”

Write a Note

Picture from “How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk”

Encouraging Independence

• To encourage Independence• Allow children to do things by

themselves• Let them wrestle with their own

problems.• Learn from their own mistakes.• Let them make their own choices

Independence cont.

• Show respect for a child’s struggle/efforts.

• Don’t rush to answer questions.• Don’t take away hope.• Don’t talk about a child in front of

him.• Encourage children to use sources

outside the home.

Freedom within limits

• For the child’s personality to unfold itself he has to be given the freedom within limits.

• Give the child an opportunity to choose the food he eats, the clothes he wears, etc.

• When there is a difference in opinion see it from the child’s perspective before you say no.There may be a point

Rewards

• Children are intrinsically motivated with a desire to become independent and competent beings.

• Rewards create a dependency on external motivation.

• Observation of Dr. Montessori.

Punishments

• Punishing deprives a child of the very important inner process of facing his own behavior.

• Mistakes are an opportunity for learning

Common Punishments Given• Spanking,scolding,depriving.

Alternatives to Punishment

• Help your child develop a friendly relationship with mistakes.

• Express strong disapproval without attacking character.

• State expectations.• Take action.• Allow the child to experience the

consequence of his misbehavior.

Praise and self esteem

• The nature of a child’s self evaluation has profound effect on his thinking process, emotions , desires values and goals.

• Self esteem is the single most significant key to his behavior.

• What can parents do to enhance self esteem?

• Story of Bruce and David

Being a Role model

• Children look up to parents as their role models.

• Do not get defensive when your child catches you misbehaving.

• Take responsibility for your misbehavior.

• Children learn by experiencing things in their surroundings.

How to Praise

• Describe what you see/ not blanket praise

• Describe what you feel• Sum up the child’s praise worthy

behavior with a word.

TO SUM UP

• We communicate volumes about how we feel about our children by the kind of home we make for them.

• By including children in our family and showing concerns for their feelings and respecting their interests, we tell them how much they really mean to us