blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of god. mt 5.9

Blessed are the

peacemakers,

for they will be called

children of God.

Mt 5.9

Taming the WolfTaming the WolfPeace through Faith

Taming the WolfTaming the WolfPeace through Faith

Resolving Conflicts Ruining Your Life

The Little Flowers The Little Flowers of St. Francis of St. Francis

The Little Flowers The Little Flowers of St. Francis of St. Francis

Mediation:Facilitated

Conversation

MEDIATIONMEDIATIONArt of Restoring Art of Restoring

Harmony by seeking Harmony by seeking Unity Unity

in the Presence in the Presence of the Holy Spirit. of the Holy Spirit.

MEDIATIONMEDIATIONArt of Restoring Art of Restoring

Harmony by seeking Harmony by seeking Unity Unity

in the Presence in the Presence of the Holy Spirit. of the Holy Spirit.

Taming the Wolf Institute

SpirituallyTransformative

Mediation

““The whole of human The whole of human

history has been history has been the story the story

of dour combatof dour combat with the with the

powers of evil...”powers of evil...”

— Gaudium et Spes — Gaudium et Spes

37 - 2 37 - 2

““The whole of human The whole of human

history has been history has been the story the story

of dour combatof dour combat with the with the

powers of evil...”powers of evil...”

— Gaudium et Spes — Gaudium et Spes

37 - 2 37 - 2

“...an essential responsibility of the Church, namely, a well-ordered love of neighbor.”

– Deus Caritas Est, Benedict XVI

“...an essential responsibility of the Church, namely, a well-ordered love of neighbor.”

– Deus Caritas Est, Benedict XVI

Conflict Created Conflict Created byby Opposing ForcesOpposing Forces

Conflict Created Conflict Created byby Opposing ForcesOpposing Forces

After the Fall

Align withWill of God

... increases in a communion of

thought and sentiment, and

thus our will and God’s will

increasingly coincide...”

— Deus Caritas Est, Pope Benedict

XVI

... increases in a communion of

thought and sentiment, and

thus our will and God’s will

increasingly coincide...”

— Deus Caritas Est, Pope Benedict

XVI

“The love-story between

God and man consists in

the very fact that this

communion of will ...

“The love-story between

God and man consists in

the very fact that this

communion of will ...

Power

Rights

Interests

Matthew 18:15 Interests

Matthew 18:16 Rights

Matthew 18:17 Power

Positions vs. Positions vs. InterestsInterests

Positions vs. Positions vs. InterestsInterests

PositionsPositionsPositionsPositions

InterestsInterestsInterestsInterests

Compete

Avoid

Compromise

Collaborate

Accommodate

Sati

sfy O

wn In

tere

sts

Satisfy Other’s Interests

Satisfy Other’s Interests

Accommodate

Avoid

Other

Self

Self

Compete

Compromise

Self

Other

Self

Other

Collaborate

Distributive vs. IntegrativeDistributive vs. IntegrativeBargainingBargaining

Distributive vs. IntegrativeDistributive vs. IntegrativeBargainingBargaining

Cut the Pie Expand the Pie

Sati

sfy O

wn In

tere

sts

Satisfy Other’s Interests

DivineCollaboration

Satisfy Will of God

Align withWill of God

Discerning the Will of God

Compete

Avoid

Compromise

AccommodateSati

sfy O

wn In

tere

sts

Satisfy Other’s Interests

DivineCollaboration

Skills to DevelopSkills to DevelopSkills to DevelopSkills to Develop

Recognize habitual responses.

Redirect toward collaboration.

Direct attention to Will of God.

Convening:Convening:Getting Getting to theto the

TableTable

Convening:Convening:Getting Getting to theto the

TableTable

Safety,Safety,Hope & Hope &

WillingnessWillingness

Safety,Safety,Hope & Hope &

WillingnessWillingness

Increase Increase security security and love.and love.

Increase Increase security security and love.and love.

Reduce fear.Reduce fear.

Be Not AfraidBe Not Afraid

Reduce fear.Reduce fear.

Be Not AfraidBe Not Afraid

AssessAssessBe, Do, HaveBe, Do, Have

AssessAssessBe, Do, HaveBe, Do, Have

What do you want to What do you want to BeBe that has been opposed?that has been opposed?What do you want to What do you want to BeBe that has been opposed?that has been opposed?

What do you want to What do you want to DoDo that has been opposed?that has been opposed?What do you want to What do you want to DoDo that has been opposed?that has been opposed?

What do you want to What do you want to HaveHave that has been opposed?that has been opposed?

What do you want to What do you want to HaveHave that has been opposed?that has been opposed?

AssessAssessBe, Do, HaveBe, Do, Have

AssessAssessBe, Do, HaveBe, Do, Have

Power Power

PrestigePrestige

PossessionsPossessions

PridePride

Power Power

PrestigePrestige

PossessionsPossessions

PridePride

Human Needs Human Needs & Spiritual Needs& Spiritual NeedsHuman Needs Human Needs & Spiritual Needs& Spiritual Needs

Human Human NeedsNeedsHuman Human NeedsNeeds

Spiritual Needs

God

Brother Brother

[ Trinity ]1

51

5

... love of neighbor is a path that leads to the encounter with God and ... closing our eyes to our neighbor also blinds us to God. — Deus Caritas Est, Pope Benedict XVI

... love of neighbor is a path that leads to the encounter with God and ... closing our eyes to our neighbor also blinds us to God. — Deus Caritas Est, Pope Benedict XVI

BrotherBrother

Mediator

Reconciliation

We can not love the God we can not see

unless we love the God we see within ourselves

and in others. – St. Bonaventure

We can not love the God we can not see

unless we love the God we see within ourselves

and in others. – St. Bonaventure

God

Brother

[ Trinity ]

15

Christ Christ the the

MediatorMediator

Christ Christ the the

MediatorMediatorPriest as Priest as mediatormediatorPriest as Priest as mediatormediator

If I have no contact whatsoever with God in my life, then I cannot see in the other anything more than the other, and I am incapable of seeing in him the image of God.

— Deus Caritas Est, Pope Benedict XVI

If I have no contact whatsoever with God in my life, then I cannot see in the other anything more than the other, and I am incapable of seeing in him the image of God.

— Deus Caritas Est, Pope Benedict XVI

See the Divine See the Divine in in the Otherthe Other

See the Divine See the Divine in in the Otherthe Other

God

Brother Brother

[ Trinity ]1

51

5

IMPASSEIMPASSEIMPASSEIMPASSE

Barriers to ConveningBarriers to ConveningBarriers to ConveningBarriers to Convening

ExpectationsExpectationsExpectationsExpectations

Need toNeed to Be RightBe Right

Being MadeBeing Made WrongWrong

Need toNeed to Be RightBe Right

Being MadeBeing Made WrongWrong

Emotions Color Emotions Color the the

Story & Story & PerceptionsPerceptions

Emotions Color Emotions Color the the

Story & Story & PerceptionsPerceptions

Destructive Destructive EmotionsEmotions

Destructive Destructive EmotionsEmotions

Faulty Faulty PerceptionsPerceptions

Faulty Faulty PerceptionsPerceptions

The situation was perceived

inaccurately

Prejudice or bias clouded perception

False attributions skewed perception

Perception Errors

The other party’s “inner story” is assumed

Emotional attachments color perception

Senses were impaired

WallsWallsWallsWalls

Desire for Desire for RevengeRevenge

Desire for Desire for RevengeRevenge

\

NarcissismNarcissismNarcissismNarcissism

Spiritual Spiritual

DirectionDirection

Spiritual Spiritual

DirectionDirection

FALSE SELFFALSE SELFvs.vs.

Divine SelfDivine Self

FALSE SELFFALSE SELFvs.vs.

Divine SelfDivine Self

Two False Selves FightTwo False Selves Fight

Settlement Settlement CriteriaCriteria

Settlement Settlement CriteriaCriteria

SatisfactionSatisfactionSatisfactionSatisfactionSubstantive

Procedural Psychological

Opposition to Will of God

Problem of Evil

Confronting EvilConfronting EvilConfronting EvilConfronting Evil

The The Hidden Hidden

InfluenceInfluence

The The Hidden Hidden

InfluenceInfluence

Destructive Third PartyDestructive Third PartyDestructive Third PartyDestructive Third Party

System Design System Design GoalsGoals

System Design System Design GoalsGoals