Nadia (Suhaila)

Darling, isn’t this the problem of the century, all of us have high ego, and we all want the other party to start, the discussion, but if we all kept our silence, do you think anyone would have had children, and do you think the world would have gone around?

I liked a story, check it out: http://richpersonality.blogspot.com/2012/04/how-they-saved-their-marriage.html

I think I will follow the mother’s idea with my kids. Also if we keep on fighting, what example are we giving our kids? Will they ever get married? And if they did so, will they ever be happy? or at least strive to be happy? will they not think that fighting is a fact of life instead of living in peace? Well, I know that we are all human, and we err, but how long do we keep rubbing things in?

Thanks for playing the role of both mom and dad but habibty is there any reason why he cannot make the call when he is the one who wronged me in a very mean way??? I have done it too often and I will not do so this time round whatever the outcome. Inshaallah Allah will direct us both towards the right path. He is still waiting for his visa and perhaps when he is here there will be opportunities to talk so we will wait and see. Have a great day today and everyday.

You know, the brother of the people we normally stay with is divorced from his wife since two years. It seems that they had reconciled now and are thinking of re marrying, imagine this! their kids are opposing to the idea of them remarrying? I couldn’t believe my ears when our friend told us this, apparently the kids were failing in school and were always stressed and unhappy, and once the divorce happened they had piece of mind, so they are all dreading that their short lived happiness is going to evaporate if their mum and dad live together again. So I saw the kids tonight, and I asked them, as they consider me as an aunt, I told them that no one on earth should interfere between a man and a woman, as there could be reasons for the fight that are not evident to anybody, they asked me, what for example? So I said sex, as a husband and wife can be dissatisfied with their sex life and the problems could occur, so only professionals are the ones to be consulted rather the normal joe blog, and they didn’t understand what I meant and were hung over the word sex, as if they never heard it in their lives. I told them that I am using this as an example, there are other things that no one will know, so maybe their mum and dad are now happy about whatever it was that was upsetting them, and they maybe fine, so they should not stand in the way of their happiness.

You see, I feel that kids and other adults always put conditions to how we should live our life, my kids included, they have always interfered and said things that later on I felt they should not have been said.

Of course on hindsight everything is clear, and if we were psychic we would avoid all mishaps, but we do not have the crystal ball, do we.

Don’t wait until its too late, call him and talk. Our tongues work in mysterious ways

Suad

Thanks for your prayers Susu, and for your understanding and patience. You are a great friend Suad and are very wise indeed. You don't need to change yourself at all. Very often in life taking risks is worth the adventure and makes life more exciting and enjoyable. That is what we have to do, live our lives and be happy. Sometimes when you are too cautious you can't move for fear of imaginary consequences that may never arise. My retreat has stimulated a lot of thoughts in my head and you have helped me tremendously to see things more clearly. Please don't judge me with all that I had said, at one stage I had too much in my mind and felt totally confused.Thank you my dear friend for all your support and good luck in all your endeavors. You deserve the best in all that you do. Marwa is almost through with her exams and the anxiety and stress is diminishing for both of us, alhamdulilah. Knowing how busy you are I don't expect a reply to this my dear, just focus o n your work and may Allah reward you with all his blessings.

Nadia

Sorry Nadia that I didn’t reply to your email till now, my laptop went for repairs, and then I went to Saudi, and just came back yesterday night, so today my mission was to reply to my 500 odd emails. I went for a day to do Omra and it was great, too hot for my liking, but I loved it, I intend to this as often as I can. I prayed for you.

I am glad that you found your key, and sorry that I said that you could be influenced by your sisters, I know that you are not, and I know that you always weigh things before you do them as you are that type of people, those that never do anything or step any step before thinking about it. I for example is exactly the opposite, I venture into the unknown without thinking of the consequences, and that is why I am in trouble, I prayed to god that he relieves me from all these troubles and swore that I will not do anything before asking and thinking first. So please pray for me to change. As I need all the prayers that I can get.

Work is good, and tomorrow we go to Oman for the one before the final exhibition on the 4th of May. And then I will focus on doing the magazine and rebuild the team at work so we get the maximum out of all the thirty exhibitions that we went to.

Bye for now, we have a long day tomorrow.

My dearest Suad,

I received this from my father today. I think I have found my key at last. Thanks for your advice and encouragement. I take my long walks and breath the fresh Canadian air and it makes me feel really good. I am determined to make every day a happy and rewarding day for myself. I think that is the most important thing and I am truly thankful for all the blessings that God has rewarded me with especially my family, my friends and my children who are my pride and joy. Believe me Suad I am not influenced by anybody, it is my experiences in life that have taught me a lot of things. There is a lot of meanness and selfishness in this world that people don't believe in the natural goodness of people anymore. Even here when you are genuinely good to people they believe you are after something else. You can accept this treatment from others but from the people you really care about it hurts and keeps on hurting nomatter how much you try to forget. &n bsp;Take care and keep on being good as genuinely good people can never change.

Have a great week-end and Juma'a mubarakah. 

Love always,

Nadia

How are you Nadia? Is all ok?

Just one thing I want you to put in your mind darling, do not let your sisters’ and mother’s situation affect you, and don’t be guilty that you are happy in your house and they are not, people are different, and we must be proud of the gifts that god gave us. You can show your solidarity but not on the account of sacrificing your own home.

I used to feel bad telling y sisters (who all have problems with their husbands) that I am happy and I am doing this and that with Munther, now I don’t care, I say what I like and if people have problem with that, then its their problem, we only have one life to live, and we must live it truly and fully.

From now on, you must say: no one will influence me, no one.

From: Nadia Husein Yahya [mailto:nadiayahya@hotmail.com] Sent: Sunday, April 08, 2012 2:44 AMTo: SuadSubject: RE: sorry

You are right Suad, I will start the breathing exercises immediately and try to relax more. I am so angry with myself for having had those negative thoughts but when he fails to communicate it agitates me a lot and my mind gets clouded with dark imaginings. Anyway we all have our ups and downs in relationships so let us close the subject. Inshaallah things will unfold for the better before the summer and we will meet in Doha to celebrate. Thanks for standing beside me on needing your support. You are a very special jewel. 

From: suad@ezone.aeTo: nadiayahya@hotmail.comSubject: sorryDate: Sat, 7 Apr 2012 20:40:41 +0400

Dear Nadia, I am glad I saw this email before the other email, as it horrified me utterly, I couldn’t believe the outrage, but happy to know that you calmed down and regained your balance and thinking clearly. You know this is what you need to practice, breathing, we do not breath ,and that is why we have a lot of carbon dioxide blocking our good thoughts.

Please nadia, I want you to go to meditation classes, or those energy classes, and while you are there, just think of the good stuff that you had with the man of your life. life is great, and we must appreciate everything that comes with it, as no high tide without pearls, and no diamonds without coal, I can go on and on. also no matter how I or anyone else tell you and try to convince you, we cannot change what’s inside your mind. So I will stop here, and I hope you will have a great weekend and Easter break

I will delete the emails

Have fun

From: Nadia Husein Yahya [mailto:nadiayahya@hotmail.com] Sent: Friday, April 06, 2012 8:49 PMTo: SuadSubject: FW: gulfnews : Global education prize nominations now open

 

Sorry Suad, I got mixed up with the dates because of the time difference. I realize now he did meet you on Thursday. Anyway just forget all this now and I feel really sorry to have involved you with all my problems when you have so much to attend to yourself on work as well as domestic issues. Maybe I have become too negative and have to change my attitude first. I begin to suspect that my sisters' experiences have had an impact on my suspicions and it is grossly unfair. I will work on my emotions and inshaallah it will bring about positive results. Please delete all our correspondence on the subject.  Good luck with your endevours and have a great day today and everyday.  

 

Much love,

 

Nadia

From: nadiayahya@hotmail.comTo: suad@ezone.aeSubject: RE: gulfnews : Global education prize nominations now openDate: Fri, 6 Apr 2012 14:51:48 + 0300

Thank you Suad but my key is hidden in a very complicated maze. Inshaallah I will find it someday. When we are married that does not mean we are bound for life only to our husbands but we also have ties and responsibilities towards our parents and our children and other family commitments in general. As our parents get older, at times we need to go and stand by them and the same applies to our children. Husbands and wives for that matter should be caring and understanding when their partners are confronted with these responsibilities and not find an escape for their own relaxation whilst the partner is away. Can you tell me what enjoyment there is for him to go on trips to Egypt and Hong Kong on his own instead of opting to go and see his aging mother in Abu Dhabi or son in Yemen? If he is really building the house in Yemen isn't that where he is supposed to be? He always screams about not having enough funds to cover our expenses and yet he is never short of them when it com es to his relaxation trips? To be honest with you Suad I still believe there is a distraction getting him to travel to remote places where no one can find out. By me

working I will just supplement to his pleasures. By the w ay he was supposed to meet you on Thursday, why did he switch it to Wednesday when he was still off on Thursday unless the week-end day had another appointment???.

 

Maybe I think and analyze too deeply and this is not doing me any good at all. I feel I am clinging to something so fragile that is destined to collapse any minute and the consequences scare me. That "Nadia and I" bit was just a show and maybe a cover-up for his guilt. Anyway Suad I am glad you have found your key and I pray both me and Maher find ours. I honestly don't believe he is planning to come here but we will wait and see. Today he sent Marwa my renewed airticket through her email as though he has an allergy in typing my email address. The way I see i t he is now obsesse d with guilt and shame for what he has done to me and is afraid even to approach me.

 

Wishing you all the very best always,

 

Nadia

 

 

 

From: suad@ezone.aeTo: nadiayahya@hotmail.comSubject: RE: gulfnews : Global education prize nominations now openDate: Fri, 6 Apr 2012 10:17:43 +0300

I Nadia, some time people make jokes but they turn out to be mean jokes. Don’t worry about what he tells his sister, all of us say things about our partners. I often say things about Munther, but deep in my heart, he is unchangeable, I love him and will never part from him, and I am sure you don’t mean half of what you said. Maybe he is upset abo ut you leaving that Qatar foundation job, as the subject kept on cropping up. I think he is genuine and he means well, sometimes all it takes is to laugh out the jokes and the comments. Also Nadia when we the women are in menopause age we become agitated to the smallest thing. I for example still don’t talk to Munther’s sister as she stood beside him and wronged me even though she knows that it was munther’s fault, I even didn’t send her any pi ctures of the wedding and any information about maryam’s engagement. This I would never had done before, but I want to teach her a lesson, but I am fine with munther. You can do that to his sister, but not to Maher. The in laws should learn to respect us, but we can only earn that respect if they see that their son is well looked after. And that of course not just by cooking and cleaning, as frankly that is not our work, its by the understanding, and making ourselves available to them. Of course the coin also has another side,

and they should do this to us too, I only found the key to get this now, after 30 years of misery. So keep looking there is a key.

< p class="ecxMsoNormal">From: Nadia Husein Yahya [mai lto:nadiayahya@hotmail.com] Sent: Thursday, April 05, 2012 4:32 PMTo: SuadSubject: RE: gulfnews : Global education prize nominations now open

Dearest Suad,

 

Thanks so much for all your help. I was not thinking of not coming back as I have no other option of going anywhere else but by being away I wanted him to realize that I have some values which he never acknowledges so I hoped my absence will probably make him realize that. Despite the fact of him knowing how much I was trying to find employment there I once caught him having a laugh with his sister that my job is cooking, eating and sleeping. I hated that and I will never forgive his sister for her meanness. You know with the way he has been treating me over the past two years I really lost all confidence in myself and I cannot be focused on anything. I used to be so alert before but now I feel pretty useless. I think yesterday he was just putting on a show to impress you knowing fully well that you are my friend and you woul d probably convey everything to me. He is probably also happy with the idea that if I will be working again I will no lo nger be dependent on him. I do not deny that he has a lot of good qualities and that is why I love him but when he chooses to be mean he gets really mean. Sometimes I fail to understand how somebody so good could switch to the extreme opposite with no explanation and later no apology. Anyway I have endured this throughout my marriage life so perhaps I can endure it for the remaining years of my life although it is tough and has its challenges. Anyway life is never a bed of roses for everyone so we have to reap the roses and swallow the thorns. 

 

Thanks again Suad for being such a great friend. You are the only person I can confide in freely knowing fully well that I will get an unbiased opinion and I love you for that. I treasure my marriage greatly and my children are my most valuable possession. I hope from the bottom of my heart that I will remain bound to this personal treasure to the end of my days. I wish you the same to you too my dearest. Have a safe trip home and hope you had a rewarding mission on the business front.

 

Love always,

 

Nadia

 

  

                        

From: suad@ezone.aeTo: nadiayahya@hotmail.comSubject: RE: gulfnews : Global education prize nominations now openDate: Thu, 5 Apr 2012 10:17:11 +0300

Hi Nadia, I went out with your dear husband, it was great, we had sheesha and then dinner, and we talked about business mainly, you are still in the same house. And he is getting cleaners every ten days to clean th e house, so that part is fine, he is sick of having take away food, and we remembered your mandazi and your food. He kept on talking about “Nadia and I” went here, and “Nadia and I” went there, and so on. he went to Egypt for four days, and he is thinking of going to Hong kong if he gets his passport back from the Canadian embassy soon. He said that he will stay for a month with you guys.

I couldn’t ask him if there was a problem, as it seemed to me that t here wasn’t, he said that nadia feels lonely, and should get a job, I told him there was one but they kept on calling her but her phone was switched off.

Come back Nadia, he needs you, if had another girl, then he will not offer to take me to the Islamic museum, or spend 3 hours with me last night. He loves you and its obvious, he is even thinking of finishin g the house in yemen as Marwan is there and he could get his help.

&nb sp;

Not sure what happened between you two, being a psychic I do not feel anything from him that sounds fishy, or that he doesn’t love you. And believe me, once the kids get married, its you and him only,

Come back

Actually my house is all packed up as three days before I was due to leave Mahir told me to pack my staff as he said he would move from there after I leave but I understand he has not moved yet. I think he just did it to stress me out before my trip thinking that I would not make it. I cleared everything , even the pictures on the walls, and just left him the kitchen utensils and crockery. I hate having to ask you this but I would really appreciate if you could do me a favour when you are there. Please if you have one evening to spare go and ring the bell pretending that you were calling me but could not reach me and you wanted to see me before you left. Of course you will pretend you don't know that I am here. I just want to know

what he is up to. Just to remind you it is the third block, first floor, flat 313. He is currently in Cairo for a vacation and for all I know it could be a honeymoon!!.  As much as I still love him but after his last treatment I don't know what to think of our relationship anymore especially after what happened to both Huda's and Nadhira's marriages. it is time we start evaluating things with our eyes and not with our hearts. Have a good trip to Qatar and inshaallah it will be a very rewarding mission. 

Have a great day

 The address is Al-Mirqab Suites, Block 3, Floor 1, flat 313. If you are coming from C Ring Road, you drive straight to BHS and take a u-turn at the traffic lights directly after. Take a left at Hardees and drive straight down past the traffic lights at Doha Clinic and several lines of shops until you get to another set of traffic lights. At these traffic lights you don't go straight but you filter to the right. A few yards after you turn our complex s on your left so you will have to take the u-turn and come round. It is very easy to get to it and most taxi drivers know it. Good luck and thanks for the offer. Please Suad this is only between us.

Love you,

Good luck on your double mission my dear and thanks in advance. I hate what I am doing but I need to have clarity. Since I came he has randomly called Marwa but has not even once asked about me, as though I don't exist. Anyway inshaallah my worst fears are wrong but I really need to know. Wish you all the best in all your endevours. Why did you take a flat? Are you planning to stay for a long time or are you going with your family? Good luck and have a pleasant stay.

Love,

Nadia

 Fatima (

By the way Suad I have a friend you often has a dream that she is in a bare, cemented room and she is struggling. Have you any clue what her dream means as you are an expert in interpreiting these things. Let me know your thoughts.

Hi Suad and thanks so much for your response. You are not only my friend but a friend of my friends too. You shocked me with your answer, you are really talented in these things. Actually she is an artist and a great one too. I am sure she will be really pleased with your response as she was rather troubled trying to reason out what her dreams meant. Well as for me I am here inshaallah until almost the end of July then time will tell. What do you see emerging from my life? Anything good to encourage me by????? Let me know. Hope your life is progressing well as Jihad's wedding plans are drawing nearer. Inshaallah all will go well. Take care and I wish you and your family all the very best. Marwa is fine alhamdulilah and sending her love too.

Tell your friend that she has to come out of her depression, she will be fine and she will start earning lots of good stuff, whether its money or wisdom. Tell her that even though the room she is in is bare, but at least it is sheltered. Ask her if the dream was in colour? If it is, then she is also artistic and needs to explore that side of her life. Her struggle is because she doesn’t know what she wants.

I love you Nadia, you keep on remembering me with these things. I sometimes believe that I know these things? But I don’t, I only see things at times.

Please Suad this will be my last request on these issues on behalf of my friend. Can you attempt to analyse this one?. I know you must be very busy so I promise there will be no more. Don't worry about me, life is full of ups and downs and whatever will be will be. I am here because for now my daughter needs me the most and I need her too. We should have a strong faith and strive for the best. Good luck with your life dear, you are strong willed and well focused and mashaallah I admire you for what you are. Thanks for being a great friend.

Much love,

 

 Love Fatema

Thank you my darling, you are a treasure I cannot afford to lose. May Allah always protect you and shower you with His blessings. 

As for you opologising, please don’t, I love you more than my sisters walla Nadia, God introduced us and we have been together on and off, but you and your sisters are always in my mind, and I like your friends too.

Thanks Susu for your advise and for being such a great friend. If my husband needs me he should at least show me that he does. With the signs  pointing in the opposite direction he indicated to me in every respect that he needs his space so I gave it to him. He knows whatever he does I am always there for him. At this stage of my life I don't think I can put up with this treatment any more. He has to love me as well as need me. Needing me with no sign of loving me is not enough. For me now love, understanding, compromising and respect are the most important components to a successful marriage. I need to be treated like an individual who has a right to believe in what she believes in and be respected. He needs to learn to share his thoughts and not impose and dictate and cross-check whatever I tell him with his sister or family showing me that he does not trust me or my family. If he can offer me these ingredients I am all there for him. Please don't copy this to Fatema a s she has enough problems of her own.

Love you,