a publication of st. philip’s episcopal...

ThePhilippianApublicationofSt.Philip’sEpiscopalChurch

St. Philip’s Episcopal Church * East Moore & Dry Streets * P.O. Box 10476 * Southport, NC 28461http://www.stphilipschurch.org * E-Mail: [email protected]

Phone: (910) 457-5643 * Fax: (910) 457-6991 *

Vol. 9, No. 9 September 2012

From the Rector

“Caring for the most important relationship in your life?”

Since I’m the one asking the question, you’ve probably already guessed what I’m going to say. And you would be right. For me, the most important relationship in life is the one God established with me at my baptism. And, I admit, I am unabashedly in love with Jesus Christ. I believe he is my Lord and Savior and the one I look to for guidance in how I live my life. Having said that, I must also confess that my fidelity to that relationship is less than perfect. I am a sinner, and I fall short of God’s expectations of me. But I also earnestly try to learn from my mistakes. I work hard at self‐reflection.

I begin this Philippian article with that statement in response to a survey summary I read recently. The survey, involving recently divorced men and women, asked them to identify the top five regrets/behaviors they believe contributed to the demise of their marriage relationship, and that they resolved to change if they were to marry again. The study group had a divorce rate of 46%, a rate in line with current Census data, and basically unchanged for generations.

I remind couples, during what we refer to as pre‐marital counseling, that there are a handful of basic factors that make for a successful marriage relationship. It really isn’t rocket science. And the survey results conducted by the University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research bear that out. I would argue that those factors are key components of any relationship we deem important. And they are especially important in helping us live out our baptismal vows.

St. Philip’s Episcopal Church September 2012

Here are a few of the study findings:

1. We need to give each other more positive affirmation and emotional support. Encourage one another. Show the other that you appreciate them, and do it regularly. Compliment their ideas and acknowledge their efforts.

2. When things don’t go the way they were intended, or you hoped they would, let it go. Hanging on to past irritations isn’t healthy for relationships. Clear the air and move on. People who hold on to real or perceived wrongs are less healthy physically and emotionally. If you have trouble letting go, take the advice of Abraham Lincoln, who was said to have advised his Secretary of War who had written an emotional letter to one of his generals. Lincoln said, “Put it in the stove. That’s what I do when I’ve written a letter when I’m angry.”

3. How we communicate with one another has a huge impact on the quality of our relationships. We need to find a way to speak to each other in a calm and caring voice. Learn to argue in ways that produce solutions, not more anger. Practice ‘active listening.’ Really listen to the other person, repeating what you have heard and asking if you have understood it correctly. And spend more time talking with each other about things that have nothing to do with the usual stress points in life ‐ work, family and finances.

My brothers and sisters, whether we’re talking about our relationship with God, our spouse, our family, friends, or just a casual acquaintance, the quality of that relationship is important. Take some advice from those who have suffered through the pain and grief of broken relationships. Be self‐reflective. Practice being affirming and supporting. Don’t hang on to hurts that won’t heal. Open up more and practice ‘active listening.’ Work hard at keeping God first, others second and self third. I guarantee you will be a better person for it.

God bless you and remember you are loved!

Fr. Barry+


FALL WORSHIP SCHEDULE BEGINS SEPTEMBER 16TH 8:00 AM - Holy Eucharist

(Alternating between Rite I & Rite II) - St. Philip's Church 9:15 AM - Sunday School

10:30 AM - Holy Eucharist Rite II - St. Philip's Church

WELCOME BACK BEACH WORSHIPERS AND

VACATIONERS! We'll celebrate the beginning of our Fall worship on Sunday, September 9th with a combined worship at 10:30 AM at St. Philip's. Following the service we will gather at the Southport Community Building for a covered dish luncheon. Please bring a dish to share!!

Sunday School classes resume September 9th at 9:15 for ages 3 years old through adults. Adults meet in the Parish Hall while all children and youth will gather in the Choir Room before going to their classes.


‘Christianity After Religion’

The End of Church and the Birth of a New Spiritual Awakening

Wednesday, September 5th at 10AM

One of the topics Diana Butler Bass reflects on in her newest book, Christianity After Religion, is Western culture’s shift away from beliefs toward experience.

Bass spends some time dissecting what historians call the Age of Faith, the Age of Belief and the Age of the Spirit. She says, “If the Age of Faith was a time of ‘faith in Jesus’ and the Age of Belief a period of ‘belief about Christ,’ the Age of the Spirit is best understood as a Christianity based on an ‘experience of Jesus.’”

What does experiencing Jesus mean to Christians today? Are the Creeds and dogma of the Church still relevant for the Christian faith? How has the authority of Scripture, tradition, reason and experience changed?

Join our Wednesday morning Bible class, beginning September 5th, as we engage in a study of this intriguing and challenging look on how Christianity is changing in the 21st century.

If you’d like to participate, and want us to provide you with a book, please call Natasha in the church office. We’ll be ordering the books the middle of August.

Remember, class starts on Wednesday, September 5th at 10AM in St. Philip’s Parish Hall. See you there.


Seekers moves on to “Saving Jesus”

The once‐a‐month Seekers invite your curiosity and questions as we begin a new program cycle about Jesus: “Kidnapped by the Christian Right. Discarded by the Secular Left. Jesus needs saving.”

Here is the place where you can ask any question at all about faith (or what feels like the lack of it), God, religion, today’s doubts and perplexities and whether there are today’s answers…or how to embrace faith without having answers. You’re talking Seekers, where doubt is expected, no question is heretical as long as it’s honest, and faith flourishes like a well‐watered rosebush.

Centered on ideas from some of today’s most thoughtful, sometimes controversial, Progressive Christian pastors and theologians, Seekers offers a lively, one‐morning‐a‐month conversation with people who want to explore religion and grow their faith in what may be new and surprising ways, looking forward as well as backward.

Join the DVD experts—including Diana Butler Bass, Marcus Borg, Rita Nakashima Brock, Walter Brueggemann, John Dominic Crossan, Hans Kung, Brian McLaren, Helen Prejean, Tex Sample, John Shelby Spong, and Winnie Varghese—along with whoever shows up in the parish hall as we explore the relevance of Jesus for the 21st century.

Seekers meet the second Monday morning of every month, 10:00 AM ‐ 12:00PM in the parish hall. You’ll be made welcome.

THE MEN ARE BACK IN THE KITCHEN!!! Join us for St. Philip's Parish Breakfast sponsored by our Men's Club on September 16th from 8:30 until 10AM in the Parish Hall. They are wonderful cooks!! Cost: $4.00 per adult, $2.00 per child


OUR DEACON IN TRAINING

As you are aware, Pam Hayes has begun a journey that we pray will lead to her being ordained as a Permanent Deacon in The Episcopal Church. She will be meeting with our diocesan Commission on Ministry in November seeking her final recommendation to the Bishop to begin her formal academic training. Pam has also begun the process of completing background checks and doing the psychological testing required of all aspirants to ordained ministry. It is estimated that when Pam has completed her training, and is finally ordained, she will have spent approximately $6,000.00 for testing, books, travel, and required courses. And the bills have already started coming in.

So here's my invitation to you, Pam's St. Philip's family. If you'd like to help Pam with some of those expenses simply write your check to St. Philip's and annotate it for Pam's Deacon training. The funds will only be used for that purpose.

We, and the whole Church, are blessed to have one of our own called to the ministry of Deacon. Your support for Pam, in both prayer and financial aid is appreciated.

Fr. Barry

BLOOD DRIVE

The American Red Cross Is coming to St. Philip's

On Sunday, September 23rd, 2012 Please plan to donate

Contact Tina Powers at 448-1972 for more information.


A WORD OF HEARTFELT THANKS

I have always known that St. Philip’s was a rare and wonderful church family, but your outpouring of support, encouragement and love towards me in the discernment process for the Diaconate humbles me. The Holy Spirit is indeed alive and well in our community, and all of you are living proof. Just to give you a progress report, I have completed the psychological examination, as well as my required physical. I’m pretty sure that I passed the physical. As for the psychological examination – well, nobody’s perfect. My next big step is the required meeting with the Commission on Ministry in November, which my husband, Bob will attend with me. Until then, I continue in reading, prayer, and meetings with Fr. Barry. Please know how much your good wishes mean to me! Many thanks, Pam Hayes Dear Friends,

I miss St. Philip's already and all of you good folks there. Thank you for the marvelous reception which you held jointly for the Vacirca family and for me. I think we all found it difficult to say goodbye. Thank you also for the pretty anchor and lighthouse bracelet and earrings. They will be a lovely memory of Southport and y'all. The gluten-free end of the table was a feast and much appreciated!

Getting me out of Southport was a major undertaking, with four heavy suitcases - the tail end of our move. I could not have done this without the willing and smiling help of the St. Philip's Odd Jobbers, who not only got me out of the house with the heavy stuff, but trudged up a flight of stairs to the apartment I stayed in for the past month, and then helped with two suitcases down again, plus the two that Barry was kind enough to store in his office for a whole month! All this effort was coordinated by Marv Adkins, and all involved deserve a big hurrah. I cannot commend them enough, they were all marvelous.

Blessings to all of you,

With our love, Lars and Fiona

Thank you, St. Philip’s


Senior Warden I know that we are all pleased to see that Pam Hayes is moving forward to become a Deacon in our Episcopal Church. We wish her all the best. As Father Barry mentioned, it is not only a very arduous but also an experience that does cost money. Anything we as parishioners can do to lighten her burden from a financial viewpoint would be much appreciated.

Work continues on maintaining our facilities especially the Carr-Jorgenson House. I would like to take this opportunity to thank our Men’s Club and our Junior Warden for all of the time spent working on this facility. As we (people and buildings both) age more work is required to keep things in top shape. If you have the time and the inclination more help is always needed. Please contact any of our Men’s Club members or any Vestry member to volunteer your services.

We are quickly approaching our start of the Christian Education year and Millie can always use more teachers. She tries to have four teachers per class so no one has to be there every week as well as meeting the Episcopal Church requirement that each class always have two teachers in attendance, please help if you can.

Speaking of Christian Education I am pleased to let you know that Matt Gould has agreed to fill out the Vestry term of Frank Vacirca and will be working with Millie in this ministry. If you have a chance, please thank Matt for his willingness to serve.

I would like to remind everyone that your Vestry meets, usually on the 3rd Thursday of the month; meetings are open if you would like to attend. Our meetings are held on the 2nd floor of the Parish Hall and we look forward to seeing you at your Vestry meeting.

In the meantime if there are any questions you may have or any subjects you would like to discuss please let me or any other member of the Vestry know.

Bill Bill Bittenbender [email protected] Home 910-253-9846 Cell 910-279-0511

mailto:[email protected]


Stewardship A Diocese Financial Audit for St Philips Year 2011 was conducted on July 11th and 12th at the Church by a Contracted Auditor. We are pleased to report that the audit went well and all financials were found to be in good order. We are in the process of planning our Stewardship Program for the fall and will kick this off with a Ministry Fair held during the last three Sundays in September. The purpose of this fair is to provide educational materials on all of our current ministries and recruit new volunteers to help support these programs. If you would be willing to assist in any manner for a few minutes after the 8:00 or 10:00 service by assisting at a table, please give Natasha, Peter del Sol or Mandy Tomz a call.

Peter dol Sol Mandy Tomz

Service The Service Commission wants to thank all who have helped us during this month with our many events. First, thank you to Sharon Sands and all of her helpers who had a beautiful and very special funeral reception for Jo Melcher’s funeral. Thank you to all who cooked, set up, and cleaned for this event. Also, thank you to all who helped with the reception for Fiona Bergstrom who moved to Australia and to the Vacirca Family who moved to Florida. Both events were lovely and were made even more so by the beautiful flowers arranged by Meezie Child and Julie Harrelson. Thank you especially to Julie Harrelson who set up for the going away reception.

The Commission has canceled the retreat to Trinity Center for lack of interest. We may consider looking into this again in the future.

Tommy Harrelson Ruth Smith


STEPHEN MINISTRY MINUTE

A STEPHEN MINISTRY PRAYER GUIDE

“...since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. (Colossians 1:9)

Each Sunday, in our “Prayers of the People”, we ask your prayers for our Stephen Ministers. What does that look like? How can you as parishioners pray for our Stephen Ministers? Below are some suggestions for ways in which you might offer prayer support for the various aspects of our Stephen Ministry program.

Pray for our Congregation:

That people be sensitive to caring needs around them at church, work, home, and elsewhere, responding with a caring, listening ear, and referring people to Stephen Ministry when appropriate.

That people be open to receiving care from others, recognizing that God intended us not only to love and care for others but also to be loved and cared for by others.

Pray for the Caregiving by Stephen Ministers:

That God will make them effective intercessors for the needs of their care receivers, giving insight into what Jesus is praying as He “always lives to intercede for them” (Hebrews 7:25)

That God will enable them to hear what the care receiver tells them and what the Holy Spirit is saying to them.

Pray for our Care Receivers:

That they will be blessed by the caregiving of their Stephen Ministers. That God will give them insight and comfort from scriptures that relate to their life situation. (There are, of course, many other ways in which you can pray for our Stephen Ministry program, but hopefully the above ideas will serve as a way to incorporate Stephen Ministry into your daily prayer life.

Gene & Martha Myers (842-5160), Stephen Leaders (Adapted from Stephen Ministries, St. Louis training materials)


Christian Formation Calendar

MONTH of SEPTEMBER 2012 Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

1

2 Last Sunday of Summer Schedule

3 Office Closed

4 510AM‐ Bible Study, Parish Hall

6 7Deadline: YouthReach registration

8

9 9:30AM – Sunday School starts

10 10AM – Seekers, Parish Hall


13 14 15

16 5:30PM – Youth Group (Middle/High School)

17 Deadline: Happening


20 216:30 PM – Movie Night, Choir Room

22YouthReach 6th – 12th grade, New Bern

23 24 25 2610AM‐ Bible Study, Parish Hall

27 28 29

30 Upcoming Dates to remember:

October 14th : Bishop’s Visitation

October 19th – 21st : Happening #61

December 2nd: Family Advent Wreaths

December 21st: Christmas Play/Party


To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the sun. A time to be born and a time to die;

a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill and a time to heal ... a time to weep and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn and a time to dance ... a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;

a time to lose and a time to seek; a time to rend and a time to sew;

a time to keep silent and a time to speak; a time to love and a time to hate;

a time for war and a time for peace. ecclesiastes 3:1-8

For those of us of a certain age and with musical leanings, we will always hear this scripture as sung by The Byrds, an American rock band from California. The song and the scripture embody for me an important element of music and life, rhythm. The liturgical calendar of the church embodies this “turning” described in Ecclesiastes, as does St. Philip’s. With the coming of September and the passing of Labor Day the church returns to services in our beautiful sanctuary, and welcomes back those who have been worshipping on Oak Island, traveling and hosting summer guests. The community as a whole settles into a more structured way of living with the start of the school year and the shortening of daylight.

Music incorporated in our liturgy changes with the return of the choir and their glorious voices joined as one. I am always moved when I hear the voices of the choir in procession, beginning and ending our worship with heartfelt praise and thanksgiving.

During the summer, music for anthems and communion is provided by vocal and instrumental soloists. Rehearsals for these musical offerings have occurred on a weekly and sometimes bi‐weekly basis. Often the soloists have had multiple sessions, in addition to working on selections on their own. I want to thank all who have ministered through their gift of music this past summer.

Debbie


Where Have All The Adults Gone?

When one works for a church congregation, there is always pressure (either direct or indirect) to increase numbers of participants. There have been many studies done and blogs written about why some churches grow while others fade. It is easy to find statistics on the churched and unchurched; why people choose to attend one church over another or just stay home all together. Many of these studies then go further into specific aspects of church life – why certain people participate in certain activities. Now I know that it is difficult to generalize when it comes to people’s behaviors but I want to share with you some interesting facts that keep immerging from these reports.

1. There isn’t denominational loyalty like there once was. People are less concerned about which denomination their congregation belongs to and more interested in other factors when selecting a church. This is only in small part due to the demise of the extended family – where generations of the same family attended the same church. This extended family participation helped to greatly increase the parish Family feeling in many congregations thus keeping people feeling connected to the parish.

2. Even people without children expect to see active programs for children and youth when visiting a parish. Those who still cling to the old adage that “Children are the future of the church” instead of accepting children as full members of the Church still want to see a congregation actively nurturing and developing young church members.

3. Children by the age of 10 are more influenced by non-parental adults and peers than they are by their parents. As a parent, this is most frustrating for me since as my youngest child approaches her 11th birthday I see her life becoming more about other people (as it should) and less about her mother. Children want to emulate adults and they are taking their lead from those who are not their parents.

4. Christian Formation programs are strongest when there is a strong adult learning community. Even in the academic world, students are more inclined to attain a post-graduate degree if they know somebody who has already attained a degree. The same holds true for Christian Education, if children do not see adults actively engaged in adult formation then they are less inclined to continue to participate as they get older.

For years now the preferred age of confirmation has been inching up. One reason for this change is because confirmation has long been seen as “graduation” from Sunday school. Next month we will confirm six young people. It is my hope that once confirmed, these young people will continue to see that there is a place for them at St. Philip’s and the Church as a whole. That’s where you come in….

For our children and youth programs to continue to grow, we need your support. We need people willing to step up and become involved. We need adults willing to set the example that confirmation is not the end of Christian Formation; we need adults who are intentional in their own Christian Formation programs. We need to be the example of the adults we wish for our children to grow into.

Millie


St. Philip’s Movie Night September 21, 2012

6:30 PM

Rated PG

Inspired by Ron and Judi Barrett's beloved children's book of the same name, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs follows inventor Flint

Lockwood and a brainy weathergirl as they attempt to discover why the rain in their small town has stopped, and food is falling in its place.

Meanwhile, lifelong bully Brent relishes in tormenting Flint like he did when they were kids, and Mayor Shelbourne schemes to use Flint's latest invention ‐‐ a device designed to improve everyone's lives ‐‐ for his own

personal gain. Popcorn and Drinks will be available


FOCUS ON OUR YOUTH

Brooke and Brie Munroe

Chatting with Brooke (16) and Brie (17) Munroe at their Southport home recently was AWESOME.

Would you believe they said Pride and Prejudice and Jane Eyre were some of their favorite stories? And while these classics are cool, so are the 2012 Olympic women’s gymnastic

teams, beach volley ball and swimming competitions.

The sisters lived as very young girls on Bald Head Island (Brooke still loving it and Brie not so – too isolated), but since then they’ve been on the Southport waterfront, where they could well have served “lemonade” by the movie set, they’re that close.

Brooke

Both are excellent students, taking advanced courses. Brooke was just elected to the National Honor Society. She enjoys science and is thinking about medical school, to which her sister added how once when fishing, Brooke popped the eyeballs out of a fish and loved seeing them bounce. Brie, on the other hand sees dissecting as a bit creepy. She’s more interested in writing and people work, including

- she really said it- possibly attending a clown school in Atlanta! Both love soccer, swimming and “hanging out with friends.” They believe the best friendships are based on trust, integrity and respect.

And while they both feel there is sometimes too much pressure on them to succeed, they roundly criticized the Nickelodeon and Disney channels for giving a poor message to young school kids with characters that say they don’t want to go to school.

Both have had meaningful experiences in the Episcopal Church. Brie loves being an acolyte and appreciates the relaxed and non judgmental nature of the church. She had experiences with another tradition so she can make that judgment. Brooke participated in an East Carolina youth diocese program where she witnessed poverty and prejudice as never before. Some of the activities took place in a Spanish-speaking church in Durham, NC, and sound like it was a bit of a life-altering experience.

Brie


On the lighter side one of the joys the sisters have together (and recommend highly) is watching Duck Dynasty on TV – apparently a bit of “redneck humor”. They say they’ve laughed till their stomachs hurt!

Sounds like a good idea to me! Thanks for the visit, Brooke and Brie.

Lyn Sutton

September Lectionaries

September 2nd ( Fourteenth Sunday after Pentecost )

September 23nd ( Seventeenth Sunday after Pentecost ) Song of Solomon 2:8-13 Proverbs 31:10-31 Psalm 45:1-2, 7-10 Psalm 1 James 1:17-27 James 3:12--4:3, 7-8a Mark 7:1-8, 14-15, 21-23 Mark 9:30-37

September 9th ( Fifteenth Sunday after Pentecost )

September 30th ( Eighteenth Sunday after Pentecost ) Proverbs 22:1-2, 8-9, 22-23 Esther 7:1-6, 9-10; 9:20-22 Psalm 125 Psalm 124 James 2:1-10 [11-13] 14-17 James 5:13-20 Mark 7:24-37 Mark 9:38-50

September 16th ( Sixteenth Sunday after Pentecost ) Proverbs: 1: 20-23 Psalm 19 James 3: 1-12 Mark 8: 27-38


SEPTEMBER BIRTHDAYS 1st William Engelhart Bill Bittenbender 2nd Margaret Hunter Ward Newcomb Mark Williams 3rd Garth Edwards Bryn MacKenzie 4th Roy Mitchell Evelyn Wharton Lu Wilson Terry Acker Barry Kubler Jo Anderson Bella Hofmann 7th Chuck Yartz Bailey Rickman 8th George Myers Linda Smith 9th Hope Marie Copeland 10th Bryan Wester Hailey Robinson 11th Carol Owens 12th Carol Moore Charles Audette 13th Bobbie Lewis

14th Evelyn King John Redington 15th Bob Youngblood Thomas Parnell 16th Ruth Carver Harold Bender Becky Funderburke 18th Paul Pittenger Pat Cremins Julia Baldiga 19th Joe Lofink Donald Reynolds, Sr. Sheila Yartz Hailey Esakov 20th Wanda Ratliffe 21st Priscilla Wheeler Wanda Luey Janet Dzuricky 22nd Bonnie Thomas 24th Martha Lai 25th Kaye Mann 26th Elizabeth Ziblut 27th Patricia Hill 28th Joan Forrester Rachel Teeters 29th Carol Beers


Interchurch Fellowship – Worship Services at Dosher The churches in the Interchurch Fellowship provide Sunday services at Dosher Nursing Home year round. St. Philip's is scheduled for the month of October.

We need at least three people for each Sunday in October including one of the three who can play the piano for singing. The time commitment is 10:00 to 10:30 AM. As rules have changed at Dosher we will no longer be responsible for helping to move residents to and from their rooms. If you would be willing to help in this worthy outreach mission please contact Pat Prather at 278‐7665 or at [email protected].

MARK YOUR CALENDARS FOR THE WOMEN'S GROUP FALL LUNCHEON to be held on September 8th, 11:30 a.m., at the home of Pat Bittenbender, 3482 Beaver Creek Dr., St. James. Please bring a salad to share. R.S.V.P. Pat Bittenbender, 253-9846; Holly Meiners, 253-9642; or Ida Parker, 278-6719.

SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHERS AND HELPERS

NEEDED FOR 2012-2013! It's easy to volunteer, and the rewards are immeasurable! Sunday school teachers are teamed four teachers per class so no one person has to be present every Sunday. We are required to have at least two adults per class every week. Teachers are provided an easy to follow curriculum, training/support and all the needed supplies for their class. In compliance with new Diocesan guidelines, all people interested in teaching Sunday school need to complete an application available from Millie in the parish office. All applications must be turned in before September 6th.

Church Organization

Bishop of the Diocese of East Carolina: The Rt. Rev. Clifton Daniel III Assisting Bishop: The Rt. Rev. Santosh Marray

Rector: The Rev. Barry P. Kubler Chancellor: Ray DiGuiseppe Parish Secretary: Natasha Tatum Sexton: George Ball Organist/Choirmaster: Debbie Skillman Communication Lyn Sutton Director of Christian Education: Millie Hart Episcopal Relief & Development Stephen Leaders: Martha & Gene Myers Representative - Jacob Pfohl

Vestry Senior Warden: Bill Bittenbender Clerk: Dana Richardson Junior Warden: Tom Trivett Finance Officer: Wayne John 2010-2012: Bill Bittenbender, Lorraine Richardson, Tina Powers, Tom Trivett 2011-2013: Debbie Evans, Thomas Harrelson, Jake Pfohl, Mandy Tomz 2012-2014: Peter del Sol, Bobbie Fuchs, Matt Gould, Ruth Smith

Philippian Mike & Kathy Burke

Email: [email protected]

St. Philip’s Episcopal ChurchEast Moore & Dry Streets PO Box 10476 Southport, NC 28461 Return Service Requested

Southport NC 28461

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