threesixfive

When I first embarked on my 365 day project, I had little idea of who I was and where it may take me , I was a little lost, my edges raw and my ideas undefined. 200 days in my mind is somewhat clearer and my individual style and aesthetic is beginning to dominate my photographic style. I am still very much experimental, and very much learning. I have begun to attract an audience, a mixed array of people who are inspired, and thsoe that are critical in my explora-tion of self. In the beginning I had no idea what I could create, and the special magic that can be created through the lens, the excite-ment I would feel when I new I had taken a ‘good shot’ the anticipation during the post production, the final piece of art. In the following pages unfolds the first 210 pages of my story, a visual diary, if you will of the past days. What I have seen, and what I have done. The happy days, the sad days. The rainy days, the stressful hair-tearing moments and the ethereal beautiful qualities of the opposite days. Perhaps when I have completed this pro-ject, when someone asks me ‘who are you’ I may have the correct answer, or perhaps I will still answer with either ‘I don’t know’ or just my name. Day one begins with a story of a tent being blown away in the Isle of Wight, a hotel filled with elderly couples and a beach that stole my heart. A quaint little village that inspired the start of my journey, a moment in time that will stay with me forever- for it was the moment I really began to chal-lenge myself, my skin, my being and my meaning. After that the story grows, and my daily photos bcome almost a sort of visual journal , for pictures can often be so much stronger than words.Some days are particularly poignant in my memory- like the day I found a dead squirrel in the middle of the road, his mouth soiled with blood. I hadn’t the heart to leave him there. I wanted to take him home- give him a real funeral but I’m not sure such a thing would qualify as a reasonable excuse for missing work. I instead lay him underneath the bushes, out of harms way. I will often flick through the photos so far and remember each individual day and just what inspired me that day, I remember the days where I tried to hard, the days were I didn’t invest enough time and the days when everything just fell into place perfectly.It always astounds me just how alive I feel when I have a camera in my hands - my camera in my hands, and how the world beyond the lens becomes something en-tirely new and magical.

- February 2013

threesixfivebySophieMayanne

DAY ONE - THROUGH THE GLASSDAY TWO- NOTHING CAN HOLD ME BACKDAY THREE- PONDERING LIFE IN A PUDDLE

DAY FOUR -FEAR OF LIFTS

DAY FIVE- BREATHLESSDAY SIX- A BODY, NO BODY, MY BODY

DAY SEVEN-PERHAPS THERE IS MORE THAN ONE

At this point- a week into my project I felt like I was at a really strong point. I was recieving positive feedback, and being spurred on. I was told by a pho-tographer who frequently inspires me that ‘I have talent and it should be shared with the world’ he later told me I need to dare more and more, to look into the camera and make people believe that I believe in what I am doing- looking back now, I see what he meant, there is not as strong a connection between myself and the camera in the first photos, something I overlooked perhaps, or something that was yet to develop. In someways I consider it as shyness, which I later cast aside when I challenged myself to post undedited photos- photos that were true and raw, in their simplest form. Day one began in the Isle of Wight, in a quaint little town called Sandydown- the beach was beautiful , the people busy with their daily lives.Day two was reminiscient of how I felt about beginning this project- how nothing was going to hold me back and I could complete this, no matter what was thrown my way, how busy I was- because there is always time for what you love the most- even if it means perching on the edge of your seat gazing into a glaring into a lamp in the early hours of the morning because it is the only time- and light source- that you have. Day three is a reflective portrait in a puddle- puddles always fascinate me, and I can sometimes stare into them for hours- particularly on Sundays, Sundays are perfect puddle- pondering days. Day four is quite literal- lifts are terri-fying, especially on your own. This was taken in an old, dowdy hotel- where the lift was creaky - and probably on it’s last legs.Day five was exactly how I felt at the moment I took the photo- breathless, tired, over stretched. I was juggling what felt like 101 different things, and just couldn’t quite catch my breah. Day six is a figurative of my detatchment to my body- my dislike - and quite often disregard for it. We are on better terms now, as at the end of the day, we can’t pick and chose who we are or mould our appearance to our personal references. Day seven is symbolic in how the person on the outside is entirely different from the one on the inside- we do not show the inside as perhaps the outside is the shell- the protective layer of skin we de-velop over time. The barrier that comes with practice. Day eight is a defragmentation of a pho-tograph, a use of mirrors and a portrayal of the idea of splitting in two- similarly to how I felt on day five- not much had changed, I was still juggling different things- too afraid to drop one thing in case I dropped everything. Day nine is a simpler portrait- the first where I showed my honest face- freckles included- although they were becoming difficult to hide as the sunnier it gets, the more and more appear.

- February 2013

DAY E

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T - I AM

SP

LITTING

IN TW

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AY NIN

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BR

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DAY TEN-LOST AT SEADAY ELEVEN- PLAYING IN THE SHADOWS

DAY TW

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AY THIR

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AU

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T IN TH

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DAY FO

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DAY FIFTEEN- THE SILENT WINGS OF A BUTTERFLYDAY SIXTEEN- I DON’T WANT THE WORLD TO SEE ME

DAY SEVENTEEN- TOMORROW IT MAY RAINDAY EIGHTEEN- TO BE A CHILD AGAINDAY NINETEEN - INSIDE MY FOGGY MINDDAY TWENTY- THE GIRL IN THE GLASS DOOR

DAY TWENTY ONE - PORCELAINDAY TWENTY TWO - FEAR AND LOATH

DAY SEVENTEENI DON’T WANT THE WORLD TO SEE ME

DAY TWENTY THREE- STRIKE A POSEDAY TWENTY FOUR- NUDITY IS JUST ANOTHER FORM OF CLOTHINGDAY TWENTY FIVE- MY EYES SMILE WHEN MY LIPS CAN NOTDAY TWENTY SIX- MY FAVOURITE PHOTOGRAPHDAY TWENTY SEVEN- HOW DOES IT FEEL TO FEEL PERFECTLY ALIVE

DAY TWENTY EIGHT- LIT BY A QUAINT CAFEDAY TWENTY NINE- THE STORY LIES IN THE EYES

DAY THIRTY- CHILD INDIFFERENCESDAY THIRTY ONE- IN A STATE OF DREAMING

DAY THIRTY TWO- LOTUS FLOWERDAY THIRTY THREE- ‘WHAT I DO I DO BECAUSE I CAN’

DAY TH

IRTY FO

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- NATU

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DAY TH

IRTY FIV

E- A W

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DAY THIRTY SIX- A SINGLE FLOWER, A WHOLE BOQUETDAY THIRTY SEVEN- WILD FLOWER

DAY FOURTY- SOMEONE IS ALWAYS WATCHING YOU

DAY FOURTY ONE- BEHIND MY MASKDAY FOURTY TWO- I THINK AND I THINK AND I OVERTHINK

DAY FOURTY THREE- SEEING DOUBLEDAY FOURTY FOUR- KEEPING A WATCHFUL EYE

DAY

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DAY FOURTY EIGHT- STONE COLDDAY FOURTY NINE- NANA’S HOUSE

DAY FIFTY- A HAZE OF VAGUENESSDAY FIFTY ONE- LAYERS ON LAYERS

DAY FIFTY TWO- IS IT STRANGE TO FREQUENTLY THINK THAT ONE SIDE OF MY FACE IS NICER THAN THE OTHER

DAY FIFTY THREE- JILTED

DAY FIFTY FOUR- DREAMS OF FALLINGDAY FIFTY FIVE- KALEIDAFLOWERDAY FIFTY SIX- TALKING ABOUT ONES SELF MAY BE A WAY OF HIDING ONES SELF

DAY FIFTY SEVEN- THE ASCENTDAY FIFTY EIGHT- STRETCHEDDAY FIFTY NINE- DISTORTION

DAY SIXTY- RED SILKDAY SIXTY ONE- NATURES ROSE

DAY SIXTY TWO- BLACK RIVER KILLERDAY SIXTY THREE- WOVEN INDAY SIXTY FOUR- LOST IN THE DARK

DAY SIXTY FIVE- YOU DIDN’T SEE, BUT I SAW

DAY SIXTY FIVE- A ZIP OF AN ECHO

DAY SIXTY SIX- STAGNANT WATER

DAY SIXTY SEVEN- A GLIMPSEDAY SIXTY EIGHT- FRAMED

DAY SIXTY NINE- THE JOURNEY HOME

DAY SEVENTY- BEHIND CLOSED DOORSDAY SEVENTY ONE- HEAD IN THE CLOUDS

DAY SEVENTY TWOUNRAVELLING

DAY SEVENTY THREEA GLINT

DAY SEVENTY FOUR - WANTING TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSEDAY SEVENTY FIVE- SILHOUETTED

DAY SEVENTY SIX- I CAN’T SHAKE THIS MOODDAY SEVENTY SEVEN- IN THE SPOTLIGHTDAY SEVENTY EIGHT- FRUSTRATION

DAY SEVENTY SIX- I CAN’T SHAKE THIS MOODDAY SEVENTY SEVEN- IN THE SPOTLIGHTDAY SEVENTY EIGHT- FRUSTRATION

DAY SEVENTY NINE- CINEMATIC

DAY

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DAY EIGHTY THREE- IF DESTINY STEMS FROM OUR NAME, THEN I WEEP FOR THE FLOWER NAMED WILT

DAY EIGHTY FOUR- A MOMENTS REST. DAY EIGHTY FIVE- THROUGH THE GLASS EYE

DAY EIGHTY FIVE- INSIDE MY OWN BUBBLE, FLOATING AND FLOATING

DAY EIGHTY SIX- YOU CAN NOT SEE ME BUT I AM ALWAYS HERE

DAY EIGHTY EIGHT- CONSCIENCE

DAY EIGHTY NINE - FREE AS A BIRDDAY NINETY- TUNNEL VISION

DAY NINETY ONE- SUFFOCATION

DAY NINETY TWO- ARCHITECTURAL STRUCTURE

DAY NINETY FOUR- A CIRCULAR HOLE IN MY MIND

DAY NINETY FIVE- SC ATTERED LIGHT

DAY NINETY SIX- CAMDEN TOWN

DAY NINETY SEVEN- AUTUMN MOOD FAIRY

DAY NINETY EIGHT- VINTAGE LACE, VINTAGE FACE

DAY NINETY NINE- I CAN NOT WAIT TO BE BACK INSIDE MY SKETCHBOOK

DAY 100- CLASPED HANDS

DAY 101- MY EYE IS ON THE ROAD AHEAD

DAY 102- PORTOBELLO ROAD DAY 103- TWO SIDES

DAY 103- UNDER THE STARRY SKY

DAY 104- GUSTLESSDAY 105- A TRIP TO SELFRIDGESDAY 106- SOMETHING ON MY SHOULDER

DAY 106- GRILLED

DAY 107- CITY RAIN

DAY 108- SHADOW PLAY

DAY 109 - POP POP POP

DAY 113- I SEE, EYE SEE

DAY 114- I H

AVE

AN

SLR

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LUE

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US

E IT

DAY 115- TO

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DAY 116- M

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S IN

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OTTLE

DAY 118 - SHOWTIMEDAY 119- LOOKING BEYOND YOUDAY 120- TRIPLED

DAY 121- VINTAGE SUNDANCER

DAY 122- 38 WOODSEER STREET

DAY 123- THE BLURRED LINE BETWEEN REALITY AND THE WORLD

DAY 124- ALL EYES

DAY 125- S

UN

NY S

IDE

UP

DAY 126- FA

BR

ICATIO

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AY 127- BE

NE

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DAY 128- S

UB

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RG

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DAY 129- IC

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OLD

DAY 129- BRIGHT WHITE INDIGO LIGHTSDAY 130- BLUE HUESDAY 131- DOTTEDDAY 132- MOTH

DAY 141/D

AY 142- SIM

PLIC

ITY

DAY 143- UP IN SMOKE

DAY 144- C

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DAY 145- B

LAC

K M

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IC

DAY 146- BLINKERED DAY 147- HEAVY EYELIDS

DAY 148- A DELICATE TOUCH DAY 149- CITY CHILLS

DAY 150- ONE EYE WILL ALWAYS SEE

And the story will end here for now, 210 days in, 155 to go. I think perhaps afterwards I will continue on, it would seem odd to not dedicate hours of my day to this project. To the highs, the lows , the break-throughs and the blows.210 is titled fear-less, because at this very moment in time it is precisely how I feel. 210 was a day I stepped outside of the box and instead of just photograpphing myself,I took the leap and started photograpphig others too. A continuation of my story, the story of others and life.

www.sophie-ma-yanne.blogspot.co.ukwww.flickr.com/sophiemayanneev-ans

threesixfivebySophieMayanne

DAY 211- FEARLESS