Zane Meta

Zane constantly looks out windows with this pensive look on his face. This, in a nutshell, describes Zane: he’s always waiting for the other shoe to drop. He’s so anxious that he can see what’s going on outside, even though the window is far above his head.

Zane is probably going to be the longest Meta because I’ve thought the most about him and his character development. Firstly, because he’s a constant character, and will be until the end of the legacy, so by default he would get more “on air” time than anyone else from my story even if I wouldn’t have done side projects with him. Another thing, I can sometimes relate a little bit to him.

I was very happy to find these after an hour of searching. Someone mentioned that I didn’t show nearly enough of Zane being a toddler and when I took these pictures I was nowhere near as organized with my photos as I am now.

Back in 1995, I met Anne Rice at a book signing and we learned that “Interview With a Vampire” was written after a tragic death in her family; her daughter I am led to believe. She wrote all of her demons and sadness in the form of Louis. If any of you have read the series, you might have noticed that book had a different tone than the rest of them; her sadness was the reason why. When she had finished the novel, she hated Louis and was glad that he wasn’t the main voice of the story anymore; she much preferred Lestat who was much more like her real self. Hell, even Brad Pitt hated Louis after filming the movie because he was so depressing and whiny.

This is not to say that I think that my legacy story in any way, shape, or form can be compared to a well thought out novel or that my characters are even that well written. But, I do try to get into their heads and walk a mile in their shoes so I can write for them better to make them more realistic. Well, as realistic as Sims can get when Alien Abductions, Zombies, Werewolves and Aladdin Lamps are run of the mill, “don’t even bat an eye“, everyday occurrences.

Anyway, Zane I can relate to on some level. When I’m in a good mood, it’s hard to write for him because he’s depressing; even his BC is turning out depressing and it seems like he’s bound and determined to be miserable. But, when I’m in a bad mood, or I’m feeling wounded, Zane is the perfect person to think about. The best part about him is that even though he’s sad and trying very hard not to sink into depression, he truly believes that tomorrow will be a better day.

Zane: The sun’ll come out tomorrow! Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there’ll be sun.

However, there is kind of a problem with him: My Zane is depressed because of the awful things he’s had to go through. I kind of imagine that his entire outlook and even some essential parts of his personality that makes him Zane would be absent were he in another world; that‘s because in most cases where he‘s been downloaded, he‘s had the merciful adopted kid memory wipe. Oh, sure, that eagerness to please would still hang around him because he is far too nice, but his melancholy attitude wouldn’t be there, unless something bad were to happen to him. Honestly though, that’s probably a good thing.

Of course, I couldn’t imagine him being happy-go-lucky because he was born with only 4 Playful points, and Lillian repressed him even further down to 3, so he’s a rather serious individual. I do imagine him smiling and even outright laughing a lot more somewhere other than his home dimension though.

Miles: OW!Zane: *poke* *poke* *poke*Miles: Zane, don’t be offended, but um, I’m allergic to your tickles. Yeah…

“I always picture Zane as having some nervous mannerisms. Maybe this comes from Lytton and my interpretation of his Nice Point CreepySmile: it's a futile attempt to get the other person to smile and be nice back.”

God yes, though not originally intended. Unfortunately, I always caught pictures of him either coming off of a hand steeple, a “Yay, I love talking to you!“ clap, or the “This conversation is boring,” hand gaze and finger pick.

This exact picture is the one that started it. I fell in love with the wistful look on his face while he idly played with his hands. Until this point, Zane had very few lines or appearances, so I was trying to get a feel for him. This picture spoke volumes.

Don’t mind the fact that Miles and Cecil just barged into Zane’s tiny home like they owned the joint. One should be more concerned that they squatted there like vagrants for three days even though their own houses are much nicer.

Because of those pictures, I had to work it into his character and I found out it worked for him. Stat wise, because he has a lot of 5’s in there, he’ll also rub his neck or run his hand through his hair when he’s walking somewhere, which just added to the development of nervous mannerisms.

Zane is subconsciously a nervous character, though if someone were to point it out to him, he would be genuinely surprised and probably embarrassed.

The person he was most exposed to, growing up, was his mother. She constantly told him that no one would love him or want him as much as she did…

…and look at how that turned out.

He loves his mother very much still, and it pained him greatly when she admitted that she never loved him. Deep down, he believes that there is a major character flaw within himself that makes him unlovable. “What kind of person am I if my own mother couldn’t bring herself to love me?” This is one of the many self doubting thoughts that crosses through his mind.

Because of all of that, no matter how much he’s tried to move on, he’ll fidget with his hands in uncomfortable situations, such as dealing with Tina or even when he was becoming reacquainted with the main family and the Lewis family.

These are all people that he likes, or even loves, and he’s afraid that he’ll say or do something that will make them not like, or love, him back. This, obviously, makes him terribly nervous and eager to please and so he essentially wrings his hands. I imagine that even his own Creepy Smile is more of the nervous sort.

“I must be nice. I must be happy. I want them to think well of me. I don’t want them to be mean to me. I won‘t get hurt if I‘m nice.” These are all thoughts that go through his head when dealing with most people, even Thaddeus.

Zane: I’m much too nice to say anything bad about Thaddeus, but I’m sure that if you were to say something of the negative sort, Sandy, rest assured, I won’t think poorly of you.

“Anyway, I'd like to know the physicality of Zane a bit more. If you're Dead, does it mean that you can't get headaches or acid stomach anymore?”

Yes and no. On the Dead Realm, his needs (as well as the Hula Girls') don’t drop and he (they) doesn’t get sick. The same thing applies when Zane and his entourage go onto the Mortal Realm wearing their “Robes of Office.” They are impervious to mortal afflictions. They don’t even have to breathe, and I try to be consistent about making sure that Zane does not sigh when writing the narrative. Of course, he does an awful lot in the BC, but it’s in his head and even though he doesn’t physically sigh, he mentally does quite often.

Fun Fact: The Dead are apparently very susceptible to sunburns.

However, when Zane et al go onto the Mortal Realm wearing street clothes, they will have to take care of their baser needs. They still won’t get sick but they can get hurt. Despite the possibility of getting hurt though, Zane much prefers to visit the Mortal Realm in his Non-Grim form because it makes him feel more human.

In Piers Anthony’s “On a Pale Horse,” Grim’s Outfit made him invulnerable to all things (bullets, drowning, fire, etc.) but he was warned that if he didn’t put the gear on correctly, or he went without, he was vulnerable. In fact Zane, in OaPH, had shot his predecessor in the face because the old Grim hadn’t pulled the cowl all the way over his head; he had grown careless and carelessness was how Grim Reapers died. Obviously my Zane very rarely shows any sort of violence, and the two times that he did, it was on someone else’s behalf; he would never fight for himself.

One would think that he would be relieved by the fact that he’s almost immune to most things, but it actually bothers him very much. Zane, first and foremost, wants to be normal. He desperately wishes that he could go back in time and somehow change his entire childhood so he could go to school, make friends, go to college, and live that perfect, simple life; complete with a wife, two or three or ten kids, a dog, a cat, and a white picket fence.

He can’t have a normal life, but by golly his plants are in excellent condition. He figures if the mortals can waltz on by his house on the Dead Realm and steal his newspapers without dying, then the Garden Club can pay him a visit.

It bothers him that he’s different. It bothers him that he can’t live and die naturally. It bothers him that he can’t have non-clone kids and he refuses to give away his Reaper DNA because it would horrify him to watch his own progeny outlive him; especially when he would be the one who would collect that child when their time came. In essence, Zane thinks that he's a monster.

He never wanted or asked for much. He didn’t really like the fact that his mother was planning a Legacy takeover and that he would have inherited it after her, if she would have succeeded; he didn’t want a high profile life. He just wanted a simple, happy, uncomplicated one.

Marriage, babies, grandbabies, and someone to share life’s journey with them is what makes a Family Sim tick, and Zane, quite simply, is a Family Sim above all else.

I think that even in a world where he was given a clean slate, it would flit through his mind occasionally that something about him was different. Especially in worlds where Sims run rampant with memories of their other lives. He’s bright, so he would figure out that obviously his old life had to be awfully terrible for him to go through a new life with no memory of his previous one. He would wonder about the unknown (Knowledge Secondary!). He’s a Family Sim, and a nice one to boot, though. He would not be able to fathom being mean to anyone, let alone his own offspring. Fortunately, he wouldn’t turn it upon himself like he would in my Pleasantview, where my version of Zane is very well aware of what happened to him and what type of mother he had. My Zane is far more self-destructive than a Zane who has no bad memories or experiences.

Gilbert almost looks like he's Zane's biological father, doesn't he?

Fortunately, I imagine that Adopted Zane (if he were a real person and Legacy stories show highlights of their lives, not all the mundane, everyday stuff) is preoccupied with school work, extra curricular activities, perhaps a part time job, socializing with his friends, and most importantly of all, spending time with a *GIRLFRIEND* (that will always be in all caps in his head). Because his mind would be directed elsewhere, he wouldn’t have time, or the want, to think much about the “whys” let alone brood about it like he would in my Pleasantview where he has nothing really to do other than think while he watches the world die around him.

Zane: I’m very glad you went to all the trouble of coming to my Realm, stealing my newspaper, barging into my house and eating the food that we actually have to eat off camera, Mr. Goodytwoshoes. Uninvited, I am reluctant to add, but it ought to be mentioned.Cecil: Do not concern yourself about my supposed trouble, for it was hardly an inconvenience at all.Zane: I must further add that I am aware of the fact that on your home dimension, you felt the strong desire to leave your Mysterious Journey so you could be present to witness my First Kiss with the lovely Lenore.Cecil: A young lady should not be left unchaperoned while on an outing with a young gentleman. Adult supervision, especially by one such as myself, is necessary at all times.Zane: Speaking of adult supervision, and I assure you that I hesitate to ask, but isn’t Cecilia a child in this dimension?Cecil: Please pay attention, Mr. Devereaux, for I expect you to be capable of returning this ball to me by the appropriate means rather than letting it fall to the floor in the ungraceful manner you seem to insist upon.Zane: *mental sigh* Shall I assume that you are going to be here for another three days then?Cecil: That would not be an unreasonable assumption. You would not perchance happen to have a Garden Gnome, would you? No? Ah. Regretful.Zane: You are very confident in the fact that I am never going to meet you in a “professional manner,” aren’t you?Cecil: Mmm. Quite.

“Is he genuinely naïve, or self-censoring?”

He is genuinely naïve, no questions asked. Zane’s childhood was rather brief as Lillian had fed him “growing pills” until he reached child age. Yes, in other words, I cheated his aging up as he’s the child of a spare, so I am allowed to.

Child-age Zane was the longest age he had ever been and even then, the only people he had ever really socialized with on a regular basis were Remington and Lillian. Even when everyone had to move to Pleasantview, he was kept inside under Lillian’s thumb not to be corrupted by outside influences. He was kept a secret.

All of that changed when Lillian tried to take over the legacy the first time, showing up when Sebastian was going through his mourning phase over the death of Tristen. Lillian had been very confident that she would be able to reclaim the title of heir just because she had a child and Sebastian didn’t. Lillian had told Zane that everyone would be happy to have him there. It was really quite simple to convince him of that:

She promised him.

Zane puts a lot of stock in someone promising, and even as an adult he’ll ask, “You promise?”

Zane is emotionally still a child. Lillian murdered him after he had been a teenager for just over a day, and while granted, it was an eventful day, it was still only a day none-the-less. In other words, Zane was killed before he had the chance to grow emotionally. He was only just beginning to learn about love, sex, and that people are all shades of gray, not just clear cut black and white, good and bad. But, before he could scratch the surface of human nature, or even digest what had happened the first day he was a teenager, he was dead and made into an instant adult when he became the Grim Reaper.

He had skipped an entire phase of development, and so he’s having to play “catch up” while he also struggles with his new lot in life.

This was harder to pose than it looked as Zane and Thaddeus were in the same house at this point. Twenty animation boxes, and not one of them had a simple handshake gesture that I could find. I had to summon other Sims to the lot and have Zane and Thaddeus say goodbye to them.

Of course, now I’m making him sound like Forrest Gump which he absolutely isn’t. But, he still had a rather innocent outlook on life.

He truly believed that a promise made is a promise kept.

He truly believed that, without question, parents automatically loved their children and it was silly to think otherwise.

He truly believed that doing good deeds was its own reward and that no thanks was necessary.

He truly believed that selfishness was a rarity and that people would think before they acted too drastically.

And most important of all, he truly believed that if he “got the girl” he would have lived “happily ever after.”

If you think about it, having such an innocent outlook on life is almost refreshing. And Zane, most certainly, is an innocent.

Unfortunately, he's beginning to learn, too late, that hardly anything is ever that simple and it's slowly beginning to wear him down. All of his beliefs have proven to be faulty over and over, and though he is trying very hard to fight against it, he's spiraling downward into full-blown depression. This is not to say that he doesn't still have those beliefs, or that he doesn't believe that tomorrow might be better, it's just getting harder for him and as a result, he becomes more and more anxious; he smiles less and he fidgets more.

A new belief is beginning to arise within him: if one more personal tragedy happens, he truly believes that he's not strong enough to handle it and he's in danger of completely shutting down.

Fortunately Zane is Perma-Plat, so the Sim itself isn't prone to Aspirational nervous breakdowns like his mother, who had something along the lines of four before she hit Perma-Plat.

“Is he really hopeful, or does he believe deep down that he won't get the love he wants?”

This question really threw me through a loop—to the point where I completely stopped writing this while I thought about an answer. Every time, over the next couple of weeks, that I opened this document, this question was staring me in the eye.

The only answer I could come up with is that he's both.

This isn't in the legacy neighborhood, folks. On the plus side, it's also not Tina that he's proposing to here.

“I'm loveable...right? Do you think I am? You do? Oh good! I'm so glad! Do I think I'm loveable? Uh, well...”

I know that this may come as a total surprise, but he really has some major self-confidence issues. Shocking to believe, isn't it? He, deep down, believes that there is something wrong with him seeing as his mother outright admitted that he was only a pawn and not someone that she loved. That statement went against his very nature and despite the fact that he told Lillian that she was the one who was flawed, not him, he in essence was lying.

He wants love, he craves it, and he's very hopeful that somebody will love him. But, there is his near crippling self-doubt that gets in the way. I wouldn't necessarily go as far as saying that he feels that he doesn't deserve love, but a deep down part of him actually wonders. After all, in his mind, he's an undying monster, an unnatural abomination.

An unnatural abomination who unfortunately wears his heart on his sleeve.

I really like this picture, but I hit Print Screen too soon, so I got stuck with the faded picture in the background. I might still use this in a future update, as this is the real Zane in the Legacy 'hood.

Sex is also a big deal for him. Because he craves to be close to someone, the entire thing has gotten jumbled in his head, mixed up with love. Because his love for Tina isn't reciprocated as of yet, he's obviously associated both the act of love and being in love as something that he can't have...but would very much like to.

I realize, of course, that the two are mutually exclusive. Zane hasn't though, because again, he's emotionally young. I can understand where he's coming from a little bit, though. He feels set apart from everyone else because of his unique status, the only girl he's ever really known is pretty much shunning him, and his mother was not a physically affectionate person (on camera, that is. Lillian is a Family Sim after all, so off camera she loved Zane very much).

In essence, he really wants a nice long hug. Intimacy wouldn't hurt, either. He hopes that someday he'll receive it, whether or not he feels that he deserves it.

No Zane. I know that she's not flagged as your mother here and I know that you really crave love and approval from her. I ALSO know that she's a Gemini, a birth sign that's highly compatible with yours, as well as a Family Sim. But..ick. Just...ick.

“Does he pick selfish women by accident, out of habit, out of masochism, or because he hasn't met anyone else?”

I laughed when I realized that I had the perfect picture as a response to this question (see above). Unfortunately, the picture doesn't quite display the appropriate answer. To be honest, I would have to say that his love choices are purely accidental...

I think this picture best illustrates Zane and Tina's relationship at this point.

...except for Tina. She was planned. Well, planned in as far as having her appear for Zane's little story arc when they were all teenagers. I had no intention of having her appear again until I revamped Zane's storyline.

It is interesting to note that Tina is also a Gemini, which means she's highly compatible with Zane's Pisces birth sign. Any of the other girls that I've paired him up with across multiple neighborhoods also happen to be Gemini (and I must once again add that seeing Un-flagged Lillian come up on the crystal ball makes me throw up in my mouth a little. Oedipus Complex much?).

Of course, who are we to argue with high chemistry for our Sims?

Especially when they make cute children?

Shame on you, Zane! She's standing right there, just off camera! Not to mention that Lytton is a relative of hers! And shame on you, Lytton, for not getting angry at Zane for gossiping!

So, because of this, I cannot be held responsible for whatever he does when people download him. More importantly, I can't be held responsible for who he falls in love with based off of his chemistry and aspiration compatibility.

You have been warned.

I do have Sims from other legacies in my game, honest I do! It's just that the Squeaky Clean characters are always the ones who demand more face time by wandering by. I think they all attend some sort of seminar run by Cecil.

Joking aside, I would also have to say that his love choices are also based off of the fact that he really hasn't been exposed to anyone else. He meets someone, almost immediately likes them, falls in love with them, and then gets hurt when they don't feel the same way about him. Because of his high Nice points, he has the possibility to get himself into a lot of trouble because he (as well as most Nice Sims) has a tendency to push hard for high social interactions sooner than a lot of other Sims would like.

I'm completely serious when I say that I've bred Zane like a stud horse across multiple neighborhoods. In fact, one neighborhood has eight generations of his descendants; all of which will be extracted and made into Townies for a future project.

In essence, not only does he love being in love, but he's also in love with the idea of being in love. He's not a Romancer and he's never the type to play the field. Pretty much as soon as he sets his sights on someone, he pines after them.

Wow, that brings the “Creepy Nice Smile” into a whole different perspective, doesn't it? That is totally not my intent.

What's her name? I honestly can't remember. More importantly, why was I attempting to do an Apoc when if I do one, it would be after I'm done with the legacy? I don't know that, either. The neighborhood has been since deleted before Zane even graduated college.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that while he's not a romancer, he would be the ultimate romantic. Poetry? Check. Flowers and candy? Check. Remembering his girlfriend/wife's birthday without being reminded? Double check. He's not the perfect guy by far, but he's certainly a pretty good candidate...if he were real and all that is.

I suppose I could go on to say that his romantic choices are based off the fact that he really wants the love, attention, and approval from his mother so he chooses girls who are similar to her. But, honestly, that really isn't the case. Sure, he would like those things from Lillian, and he's messed up in the head a bit, but he's not that messed up!

So, that's pretty much it. Zane has come an awful long way from his original character concept, which was to be Lillian's evil minion who was going to take over the legacy. Instead, he had those blasted 9 Nice points which forced me to create a rather sweet, albeit messed up, character that has won a lot of people's hearts.

Would you believe me when I say that I'm surprised that it was Zane everyone liked? I really thought Lillian would have been my breakout character. Then again, I've personally been partial to the villains of a story, so maybe it's just me.

I hope you liked reading this and that it didn't come off as too rambling and incoherent. I also hope that you liked seeing the excess and mostly original footage of Zane across his multiple lives. Needless to say, most of this won't appear in any future chapter because in all neighborhoods but the legacy one, he's a very happy Sim.

Will he ever be happy in Legacy! Pleasantview? Time will tell.

Thanks for reading!

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