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Z Diary 6

By S. Lei Pyke

April:

Finally getting the chance to hang out within the undead culture has given me a

new perspective on my own life-after-life. Unfortunately, the knowledge that Wilkinson

is actually here frightens me more than anything. . .except maybe being holed in a crate

again.

I used to think that a Zombie apocalypse was not possible. I mean, theyve been

so easy to track and eradicate. Easy for us, at least. Now, it is not so simple.

Abe and Tony found a pack of them while out for a night with the Phobos pact.

They left me with Marys pact while they were out, and they didnt even tell me.

Actually, it is because of the wards on the safe house, but the point is that theyhave done their level best to keep us from communicating. Surprisingly, for creatures

that spend half their lives as inanimate corpses, they have succeeded. During the night,

the boys have gone out while I remained in the house. During the day, they lock our

doors. Not really necessary considering the fact that our continued safety depends on us

hiding and not being identified. I think mostly its because they are a little afraid of what

happens when we are together. Not that anything would, but you know vampires are

pretty vulnerable during the daylight hours. Not that we would do anything. Were not

ungrateful enough to go and do something like that. And were not stupid enough to go

out in the daylight, but for me in particular it is frustrating.

Gender doesnt really matter among the undead, but still, sometimes it totally

sucks to be the only one of my kind with a female body type.

We also learned something about vampire blood. Apparently, if we consume it,

we exhibit the traits of the pact we consume from the time that it is consumed until the

sun rises. After that, its nightey night, just as they do. We just get up a couple of hours

later and continue on as we always have been.

We ate of Cal too. That was an interesting experience. We wound up with an

insatiable hunger that resulted in us being locked up again while we were fed.

Apparently Cal feels like this all the time now. God I am glad that I am no ghoul.

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Damnit. I wanted some more permanent cool powers. Its not just that they go

away, but that I have to drink their blood to get it, and vampires taste bad. When I mean

badI mean like the living equivalent of eating green chicken with penicillin breading

topped with curdled milk gravy and served with a side of thousand year eggs and pickled

beets with caramel dressing for dessert. And a vomit soda to wash it down. Actually. .

.that green chicken does sound like a good meal right now. . .

Oh, they were insulted when I said that. Apparently, to them their blood tastes

foul across the different pacts, but delectable within their own. I think they believe I have

no palate. Hunh. At least I can eat solid food, bones and all. Apparently humans think

that vamp blood is pretty tasty as well. Yeah. . .right up until they realize just what the

blood does.

Oh yeah, I never want to see that again, by the way. A turning that is. Its. .

.disturbing. Its far, far from the glamorous little transformation the novelists talk about.

Most of those, I swear are P.R. rags for the case that being undead is just like being alive

with a few cosmetic caveats.

No. Just no.

And vamps never ever turn people who are dying. That means all that shit about

vamps turning some schmo who got shot senselessly or curing a terminal disease by

making them undead. . .Its disgusting, horrifying nonsense. A turning has to be entered

into from a pact between the vampire and a healthy, willing individual. Healthy

meaning in the prime of life with no obvious terminal illnesses or defects.

The reason is that there is a damn good chance that the pain of transformation will

kill a weak body before the vampirism takes hold. It kills the old and the young too. No

child vampires, and no crones. It is an exacting. . .condition.

There is an old saying that It is OK for you to love the dead. It is not OK to love

the dead. It is downright vile to make them love you back. On the back of that, vampires

are vile by nature; even more so than humans. No matter how sweet they are, no matter

how much they act like a good guy, they are still evil. For that matter, so am I, so dont

kid yourself. I think I am finally coming to terms with that, though Abe, Tony and I have

the only really good case for thinking otherwise, but even then its a stretch. But at least I

cannot pass on my condition.

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This turning happened because of love and addiction, as it always does. Vampires

cant help it, but their fangs secrete a chemical that speeds healing and acts as an anti-

coagulant. The problem is that it also prompts a human body to dump serotonin. Lots of

it. You can see where that goes, right? Who needs cocaine when good old vampire

venom does the trick?

Right well, so humans who have been snacked on get hyper addicted to it. Its

kind of like how cats have that parasite that makes rats addicted to cat feces. It usually

takes two or three times, but pretty soon, humans that regularly get fed on inevitably

wind up dead, insane, or turned. The first two are more likely, as withdrawal symptoms

mimic schizophrenia and depression. Obviously the venom is not stable unless it is direct

from the beasts mouth or wed have long ago known about it in the general public. For

that, I thank the almighty. The venom also opens a psychic channel to the vamp. For the

rest of that humans life, any vamp in the world will know that the human has been fed

on. The more often they are bit, the more susceptible they are to a vampires domination.

But the blood is the only way to really turn a human.

Turning is a really intimate process for them. Its not like in the mythology where

vamps pass it like hepatitis, or suck them, turn them and abandon them. No. A fledgling

vamp is dependant on its master for quite a while, so it as to be about trust initially. For a

master to just abandon its offspring is tantamount to throwing a newborn in a dumpster.

It happens from time to time, and though a vamp like that usually survives, it is usually

horrifically traumatized for eternity. Flights exist to care for fledglings, because as we all

know, sometimes a single parent just cant survive.

That is important for us three because Cal is starting to develop as a ghoul. The

combination of his living and dead years has passed the century mark, and for some

ghoulish reason, that fact alone seems to have prompted changes in his body. He cant

care for us as a master. He never really could. The government had been our caretakers,

but they really didnt do anything other than treat us like trained beasts.

Mary has this weird notion that we are still like fledglings. I keep telling her that

this is not the case, but she will not budge from that idea. We are not vampires. We are

not ghilan. We are not voodoo zombies. We are not anything but reanimated corpses

really.

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or animals proliferate at the beginning of the season it means devastation later? Yeah, its

kind of like that. Only with the undead. And humans are the source of their offspring

and their food. Still feeling good and secure about the continued superiority of

humankind?

Oh yeah, and a fledgling is helpless. No teeth, no eyes, very little muscle

coordination. Its just raw, unbelievable, senseless supernatural power and hunger. All

that shit like nocturnal eyes and super senses and strength comes in over the course of

about seven weeks. During that time, its holed up and the members of its flight feed it

their own blood until it can hunt for itself. You know those dungeon rooms I got put in?

Those are for fledglings first, and only prison cells as a secondary function.

So if you are considering joining the ranks of the undead, just dont unless you

think you can take that kind of pain and humiliation. A vampire is not like a baby human.

They never forget their days in darkness and pain. So not only do they die an

excruciatingly painful death, but they also get to remember being helpless andthey get an

eternity to replay the whole thing in their minds.

Thank god we dont have all that though. No, we just explode into the vampire

psychic network, pass out, and then about an hour later, wake up with a headacheI am

not kidding you here, actual painand all the power of a vampire short of being able to

make others. The headache sort of persists for the whole night too, so its not all blood

and roses. Pain is definitely not my thing, but I am at least glad that something can at

least cause it.

The night began with a hunt. We had to find the remnant of the horde that Abe

found. Mary drove us in one of her utility vans, right up to one of the access points.

They broke the locks quickly, and lifted the grate as if it was made of plastic.

Down in the sewers, we trudged slowly through the muck underneath Harlan,

inspecting everything for traps. With Wilkinson in town we cant risk being careless.

Abe and Tony learned the hard way. A few of the Phobos pact learned the harder way.

Thank god we didnt need lights to see. All this vamp blood we have been getting

lately has improved our night vision. Not having to breathe is also a bonus. Tonight we

were earning our upkeep.

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Sad fact: humans never check the sewers until its too late.

Yeah, they were already here. We could taste their stench in the air. We passed

the spot where the attack had occurred the other night and began sniffing around, nose to

the ground to determine which way they went. Stronger scents indicate more recent

activity. Believe me, I know. When it comes to WMDs I got a nose like a hound.

We followed the trail downslope, which was weird. I expected them to go up.

But no. We found them finally, walking into their horde wall like stepping through a

curtain of psychic jello.

And they were yucksucking on the algae and crunching the clusters of zebra

mussels around the mouth of the storm sewer. I mean, they were actually underwater,

and they were eating these things, shell and all. At the instant our minds joined with

theirs, we were filled with insatiable hunger. That was a feeling that we had to fight.

Following that feeling led to losing ourselves.

It is at times like this that we can actually communicate mind to mind. When it is

just us three, there is not enough of a pool of minds to facilitate that. Abe opened a huge

zipper bagyou know the ones you are supposed to use for storing closet items? Well,

they are good for hauling body parts too. We threw the piece of thigh to them. In an

instant they left off of their duty to the city infrastructure and dove after the meat.

We all looked at each other. None of us would evereat mussels and algae. They

looked up at us like a bunch of happy hounds. In our minds came the pressing need

moremoremoremoremore.

These things were attacking you? I asked in disbelief.

Yeah. I dont get it either. They really tore us apart last time. Abe tore his

katanas free from their scabbards. Yes f-ing katanas. Sharp as razorblades and lightning

fast. Its just perfect for killing zombies. . .as long as you are also undead. I wouldnt try

it while still breathing.

Are you sure that these are the ones?

Damn sure. I can smell it.

The closest WMD was at our heels looking up expectantly. That vacant look

ended as Abe steeled himself and sliced cleanly through its neck. All of the others looked

at the corpse stupidly, rising up. I could feel their need to attack, but they were confused.

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Yes, these were the ones alright. In the shattered collective of their minds, I could see

flashes of recognition, paired with the sights and scents of the phobos pact.

Capture one! Cal needs it! I said, and drew my own swords. There were not

many left of this horde, and it was not long before the last one cowered, confused and

slackjawed against the wall. It could not comprehend what was happening. It was easy

to herd it wherever we wished. It went into a huge dog crate.

As soon as we left the sewers, Mary met us in her black utility van. As soon as it

smelled the vampires, it frenzied, bucking against the side of the crate. It howled and

snapped at the bars of the door, destroying what remained of its teeth. Mary could not

even look at it. She could barely stand to look at us. We were coated in the sewer

contents and blood. Zach hefted the crate as we leaped in behind. Inside, the back of the

van was filled with the older bits of the meat that the house had been keeping. I sighed

and put one piece into the crate. It was one of the gristlier bits. That shut its mouth for a

while. Without teeth, it could do nothing but gum the thing, no matter how much it

wanted to swallow.

Back at the house, Cal was right at the back door. When we opened up the door

his face went blank. It was the same expression he had when he had put me in his van so

long ago.

This is Wilkinsons new work? He asked, looking in the crate. God, its

rotting! we looked at each other. We had not noticed. You vampires, get out of here.

We need to calm it down.

It took an hour to calm it. Not even Cal passed under its senses. Only after all the

vampires had fled the house, and Cal had stepped back into his room could we handle the

crate enough to haul it down into the basement. We released it into its room and it

launched at the wall, howling. In the room next to it, Dominic cackled insanely.

Drinking my blood had done him no good. He was Charon Pact, and the exchange had

sort of backfired. I am dead, after all, and death is what he craved. He was no longer

now, but he had begun to rot. Cal was treating him, but nobody knew when it would end.

Strangely, he was filled by his own decaying body. He was not mentally whole.

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Hey you gonorrheal whore! You bring in another one of your diseased kind in

here eh? Come back here and finish what you started! Come see, you cunt! Five

hundred years! Five Hundred! And see what it has come to!

Yeah, yeah, after I clean it! I shouted, disgusted. I still hated him for trying to

violate me. Abe brought down the garden hose and I turned it on the creature. It

screeched and leaped at me, but stopped inches from my face, confused. Startled. It

actually startled. I probed in its vacant mind for some glimmer of sentience, but found

nothing.

When it was clean, I could see what Cal was talking about. Once its filthy, blood

caked clothes were ripped from its body, it was farther gone than I expected. Its abdomen

was split vertically, and though it did not look hollow, it was. In fact, all of the meat I

gave it was now on the floor. The sick thing is that once it was out, the creature went to

it, trying to eat it again. I left in utter disgust and looked in on Dominic.

He was bad off. Just the smell alone made me hungry for him, from the smell of

rot that wafted out of the observation window. His eyes were twin coals in the darkness.

When he stepped forward, I shut the window again. I have seen rot. I have seen all sorts

of horrible things, but the sight of a vampire with skin hanging, and with all of his

dentition exposed was more than I could take. Vampires are not supposed to rot. They

are not supposed to reek. They are not supposed to be diseased, but Dominic was. . .Oh

god, just the thought of an undead getting ill at all. . .

He got more than he wished for in you, you know that. Cal grated as he came

down Its incompatible. Its like blood, right? Hes got Hemolytic disease. His blood

is killing him off.

A Vampire with blood disease?

Its sobering. Said Cal, wincing as the creature slammed against its cell. I

never thought a reanimate, especially a vampire, would have his own blood turn on him.

He put a hand on my shoulder. Id like to run tests on you too. My still heart sank.

Cal, I know youre excited, but theres a full scale invasion out there! Good

god, this things the last of a horde that was under the city. Suddenly, I felt as if I was

being wrung out. I actually felt excruciating pain wrack my body. I looked up at Cal,

and his eyes were blazing with authority.

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I command you to get into one of these cells andstay there. At once, all of my

limbs jerked into motion. I fought against it with all of my existence, but I could not

ignore it. The command came as if it was from God himself. What the Fuck?

Cal? Cal? Hey man, dont do this!

I am your master, dog; you will obey. My head snapped up. I snarled at him.

That wasnt Cal.

Demon! I cried, as my body walked itself in and closed the door. My howls

joined the chorus in the other two cells as I pounded on the door.

And then I realized that nobody who could help me was there.