you professional !! are you a good parent?
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You Professional !! Are you a Good Parent?. Dr. SHAVINDRA R.DIAS MBBS,MD Psych.( colombo ) Dip in Psychol.,BA (Oxon UK) Senior Lecturer in Psychiatry Department of Psychiatry Faculty of Medicine University of Peradeniya Kandy, Sri Lanka. What kind of a parent are you???. - PowerPoint PPT PresentationTRANSCRIPT
You Professional !! Are you a Good Parent?...
Dr. SHAVINDRA R.DIASMBBS,MD Psych.(colombo)
Dip in Psychol.,BA(Oxon UK)Senior Lecturer in Psychiatry
Department of PsychiatryFaculty of Medicine
University of Peradeniya Kandy, Sri Lanka
What kind of a parent are you???
• Being a parent is a wonderful thing..
• However, it’s not always easy..
• We want our children to behave well, and to:
■ have respect for themselves and others; ■ be polite to others; ■ know how to behave in different situations; ■ be able to concentrate and pay attention; ■ share and to take turns; ■ know how to win and how to lose;
• But children often behave quite differently, and we may feel annoyed, frustrated and embarrassed.
• Parents of teenage children or children with a disability may face additional challenges and pressures.
Parenting Styles
Authoritarian Style
Parent
– Not involved or responsive, but set strict limits– Expect children to follow strict rules– Does not explain why rules should be obeyed– Punish children who disobey rules– Are controlling/power-oriented– Use verbal threats or spanking
Child
Children lack social competenceMental illness and abuseObedientProficient (Good at what they do)May view parent as enemyMay be confused about what is right/wrongHave levels happiness & self-esteem
Permissive Style
Parent
Child
– Very involved and responsive, but don’t set limits
– Has no firm rules, lenient – Accepts child as he/she is– Disciplines through love, praise and affection – Communicates and nurtures child– Acts more like a friend than parent
DependentIrresponsible / Lacks self-controlImmatureExperiences problems with
authorityExperiences problems in school
(i.e. completing projects)
Neglectful Style
Parent
Child
– Makes few demands– Low responsiveness to child– Detached from child, but fulfills his/her
basic needs– In extreme cases parents REJECT or
NEGLECT needs of child
Children not well adjusted; resentfulFeel neglected / abandoned, have self-esteemLack self-control
Authoritative Style
Parent
– Very involved and responsive, but set limits – Supportive of child’s decisions– Child centered; foster independence – Guides and shows by example– Willing to discuss choices they or their child
makes and the reasoning behind these choices– Disciplinary methods are nurturing & forgiving
Child
Well adjusted childrenGood decision makersIndependent, but seek help
when needed Happy Capable Successful
Parenting StylesDemandingness (control)
High
Low
Authoritative Permissive
NeglectfulAuthoritarian
High
Low
Resp
on
siv
en
ess (
involv
em
en
t)
You can be a good parent…
Tip 1: Talk and Listen
• Talking and listening to your child helps them to understand what’s going on.
• Do not expect the near impossible; be understanding.
Tip 2: Understand Changes As They Grow
• Exploring:• Independence:• Encouragement
• Consider the age of child. Use age-appropriate methods
Tip 3: Set Boundaries
• Set Reasonable limits; do not set them too high or too low
• Children need clear rules, boundaries and routine.
• Word the instructions positively.• Be consistent.• If you make promises keep them. Be true to
your word.
Tip 4: Reward and Notice Good Behaviour
• Rewards do not have to be material things.• Real praise and encouragement is the best
reward as it can boost a child and build self-esteem and confidence
Tip 5: Build Self Confidence
• Help them to try out new things, make friends and cope with the upsets and problems they meet as they grow up.
Tip 6: Have Realistic Expectations and Allow Consequences
• Children are children.• They will be messy, noisy and, at times,
disobedient.
• Give them the freedom to make mistakes.
• Encourage your child to think for themselves and take responsibility for their actions.
• Let the children know the consequences of their behaviour
Tip 7: When Things Are Getting Difficult
• Stay calm.
Porn films revealed!
• Think practically about the applicability of disciplinary actions, and let children know that you are serious.
• Flexibility is fine – life can be chaotic and having a flexible approach will help your children learn to do the same.
• Do not punish accidents.• Give a second chance. • Let bygones be bygones.
Remember
• All children are unique.
• The most important thing is that your child feels loved and happy even when sometimes things are difficult
THANK YOU…