workplace bullying and disruptive behavior: what everyone needs to know

7/29/2019 Workplace Bullying and Disruptive Behavior: What Everyone Needs to Know

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Workplace Bullying and DisruptiveBehavior: What Everyone Needs toKnow-Part 1Bullying behavior creates feelings of defenselessness and injustice in the target, andundermines an individual's right to dignity at ,'Vode

What is wOl-lqJlace bullying, and who is affected?Workplace bullying refers to repeated, unreasonable actions of individuals (or a group)directed tov,Tard an elnployee (or a group of elnployees), \vhich are intended tointilnidate, degrade, humiliate, or undernline, or "vhich create a risk to the health orsafety of, the employee(s).\'\7orkplace bullying often involves an abuse or misuse of pOV\Ter. Bullying behaviorcreates feelings of defenselessness and injustice in the target, and undermines anindividual's right to dignity at \.vork.Bullying is different frOln aggression. Whereas aggression may involve a single act,bullying involves repeated attacks against the target, creating an ongoing pattern ofbehavior. Tough or delnanding bosses are not necessarily bullies, as long as they arerespectful and fair, and their primary nlotivation is to obtain the best perfonnance bysetting high yet reasonable expectations for \,\forking' safely.Some bullying situations involve employees bullying their peers, rather than asupervisor bullying an employee. The tenn mobbing refers to a group of co\,\rorkerstargeting another "vorker. Supervisors should intervene immediately to address and stopInobbing behaviors.Examples of Bullying

Unv\Tarranted or invalid criticism Blanle ,-vithout factual justification Being treated differently than the rest of your 'Aloric group Being s,vorn at Exclusion or social isolation Being shouted at or being hUlniliated Excessive nl0nitoring or micromanagi,ng Being given ,,,Tarle ,vith unrealistic deadlines


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What is corporate o,r illstitutiollal bullyil'lg?Corporate or institutional bullying can Inanifest itself in different V\rays:

Placing unreasonable expectations on employees, ,,,,here failure to meet thoseexpectations Ineans lnaldng life unpleasant for (or dislnissing) anyone \,vhoobjects Dismissing elnplo)1ees suffering froin stress as '''Teak 'while cOlnpletely ighoring ordenying potential vyork related causes of the stress

o Encouraging elnployees to fabricate cOlnplaints about colleagues ,,,rith prolnisesof promotion or threats of discipline

Signs of corporate and institutional bullying include Failure to Ineet organizational goalso Increased frequencies of grievances, resignations, and requests for transfers Increased absence due to siclmess Increased disciplinary actions

Ifyou are a,,,rare of bullying in the ,vorkplace and do not take action, then you areaccepting a share of th e responsibility for any future abuses. This Ineans that vdtnessesofbullying beha"vior should be encouraged to report any such incidences. Individuals areless likely to engage in antisocial behavior ,,,,hen i t is understood that the organizationdoes not tolerate such behavior, and that the perpetrator is likely to be punished.Factors Tllat Increase tIle Risk for Bullying Bellavior

Significant organizat ional changes, such as major internal restructuring ortechnological change&I Worker characteristics, such as age, gender, parental status} or apprentice or

trainee status \t\Torkplace relationships, such as inadequate information flo,,\"T betweenorganizational levels and lack of elnployee participation in decisions Work SysteIllS, such as lack of policies about behavior, high rate and intensity of,,,,ark, staff shortages, interpersonal conflict, organizational constraints, rolealubiguity, and role conflict

Washington State Departlnellt of Labor & Industries. (April 2011), Workplace bullyingand disruptive behavior: What everyone needs to know', (Report # 87-2-2011),Retrieved Novelnber 19, 2012, frOln http://,,,,,vvv.lni.'\,va.gov


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Workplace Bullying and DisruptiveBehavior: What Everyone Needs toIU1 . 0W-Part 2Bullying behavior creates feelings of defenselessness and injustice in the target, andundernlines an individual's right to dignity at ,""ork.

How Bullying Affects PeopleVictims of bullying experience significant physical and mental health problems, such as:

High stress Posttraulnatic stress disorder (PTSD) Financial problems due to absence Reduced self-esteem Musculoskeletal problems Phobias Sleep and digestive disturbances Increased depression and self-blame Family tension and stress

Bullies do not run good organizations. Staff turnover and sick leave ,,,rill be high, "vhileInora1e and productivity ,,,rill be lo'\v. Stress, depression, and physical health problemsresult in tiIne 3\,\ray froln v{ork that is costly in tenns of ,,,rorkers' C0111pensation and lostproductivity.The health problems experienced by victhns of bUllying result in a sense of helplessnessand negative e1notional states. LO,,\'\T self-esteem and a negative organizational clhnatesuppress creativity and hamper elnployees ' abilities to respond to difficult situations orchallenging goals.The breakdo''\1Jl of trust in a bullying environment l11ay 1nean that elnployees will fail tocontribute their best "'Tork, do not give extra ideas for improvelnent} do not providefeedback on failures, and may be less honest about perfonnance.Bullying is different from harassment.HaraSSlnentis one type of illegal discrilnination. I t is defined as offensive andun\velcome conduct, serious enough to adversely affect the tenns and conditions of a


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person's employnlent, \vhich occurs because of the person's protectd class and can beimputed to the elnployer. Protected classes in employment are race or color; religion;national origin; sex; Inarital status; disability; IIIV, AIDS, or Hepatitis C status; sexualorientation or gender identity; and honorably discharged veteran and lnilitary status.An exalnple of harassment could be ,\1hen an employee tells racist jokes and refers to aparticular Co,,,rol'ker or group of co,vorkers by using racial slurs, and after a complaint,the employer dO,es nothing to stop the beha.vior. Another example of harassment couldbe a Inale lnanager ,vho luakes un,velcolne sexual suggestions to a female eluployee andtouches her inappropriately.Bullying also differs from retaliation, ,vhich occurs 'when a person makes a cOlnplaint ofillegal discrilnination and is then the subject of an adverse eluploYlnent action orsubjected to harassment because he or she made the cOlnplaint.Bullying is often directed at someone a bully feels threatened by. The target oftendoesn1t even realize \.\1he11 he or she is being bullied, because the behavior is covert, suchas trivial criticisins and isolating actions that occur behind closed doors. Whileharassment is illegal, bullying in the \i\lorkplace is not.What can be do-ne about bullying?Bullying in general is not illegal in the U.S. unless it involves harassment based on raceor color, religion, national origin, sex, age (40 or older), disability,or HIV, AIDS, orHepatitis C status. Ho,,,rever, there are things you can do about bullying.Employees, regain control by

o Recognizing that you are being bulliedo Realizing that you are not the source of the problelll Recognizing that buliying is about control, and therefore has nothing to do withyour perfol'lnance

Take action by Keeping a diary detailing the nature of the bullying with infonnation such asdates, tilnes, places, '''That vvas said or done, and "vho ,vas present Obtaining copies of harassing or bullying paper trails. Hold onto copies ofdocUlnents that contradict the bully's accusations against you, such as tiInesheets, audit reports, etc. ' Expect the bully to deny and perhaps Inisconstrue your accusations, and have a,vitness vvith you during any llleetings ,rVl.th the bullyIII Report the behavior to an appropriate person

Employers


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Create a zero tolerance antibullyil1g policy. This policy should be part of the ,,,ridercommitlnent to a safe and healthful '-\forking environment, and should have thefull support of top luanagement. v\Then bullying beha\rior is 'witnessed or reported, address it ilulnediately. If bullying is entrenched in the organization, take cOlnplaints seriously andinvestigate them promptly. Reassignment of the bully may be necessaly. Structure the ,,,Torle environlnent to incorporate a sense of autonomy, individualchallenge or mastery, and clarity of tasle expectations for employees. Includeelnployees in decision making processes. Hold a\'Vareness campaigns for everyone on \,vhat bullying is. Encouragereporting. Ensure that Inanagers have an active relationship "vith the staff they supervise,

rather than being far relnoved from them. Encourage open door policies. Investigate the extent and nature of the problelu. Conduct elnployee attitudesurveys. Ilnprove Inanagemenfs ability and sensitivity to\,vard dealing ,,,rith andresponding to conflicts. Establish an independent contact for employees, such as a Human Resourcescontact.

Washington State Departlnent of Labor & Industries. (April 2011). vVorkplace bullyingand disruptive behavior: What everyone needs to know. (Report # 87-2-2011).Retrieved Novelnber 19, 2012, frOll l http://,V\.llvv.lni.v\ra.gov


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Difficult EmployeesYou kno'l'" thein. You y\Torle \vith theIn. And inside, you get frustrated "rith theln. Theyare ..the difficult people. The hardest part of dealing vvith a difficult elnployee iscontrolling your ovn.l behavior.

BasicsYou kno,,,r theln. You ,\Tork \"rith theln. And inside, you get frustrated ,,,rith theln. Theyare .. the difficult people.Most of us, at one time or another, have dealt 'with cO,\\Torkers '''Those behavior annoys us.They are bullies, fence-sitters, kno'w-it-alls, "no" people (and lIyes" people), ,.yhiners,busybodies, bro,vn-nosers, energy-sappers, thne-suckers, complainers and otherInembers of this difficult tribe. EvelY Inanager has a pe t peeve about difficult people, butnot every Inanager can cope ,,,rith theln gracefully, and in a 'I,vay that lnatches the needsand goals of the organization.The hardest part of dealing ,,,rith a difficult employee is controlling your O'''TJl behavior.Three of the most common reactions to a frustrating employee are:

Reducing hiln to nothing by saying things like, "He's useless llo Telling others about you,r frustrations and enlisting them on your side Inventing motivations for the enlployee that make her look bad by saying thingslike, nShe "vonlt do her job because she's lazy"

Though you lnay feel frustrated, ifs best to respond to a difficult elnployee in a cahn andcollected vv-ay. Why? Because it sho\",s that you are:o Professional under pressure Interested in solving the probleln, not attacking the person Evenhanded in dealing ,,,rith all employees - even the difficult ones

By responding calmly, you leave the door open to talking franldy vvith the difficultelnployee and solving the problem.There are many strategies for dealing 'with different types of difficult employees, but inmost cases, discussing the probleln is a good starting point. Many managers have foundthat the follo\,ving phrases can spark such a conversation, according to Inanagelnentconsultant Art Bell:


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"Letls not play the blame game. Telllne ho'w you see the problem. t (This is usefulvvith 6lnployees \"rho blame others.) "I ,,,rant to kno'\vyour feelings about the situation and you think -\1e can getbC!-ck on track. f (This is useful 'with elnployees \,vho are quietly frustrated.)

urln not asking for an apology. I ,,,rant to understand where you\e cOIning fronl."(This is useful 'with employees ,,,rho explain by apologizing.) "In your vie",T, v{hat can I do to help resolve the probleln? What can you do?"(This is useful ,,,rith employees \vho think that situations are hopeless orunmanageable. )I{eyTipsI{eyTip 1Timeouts can help. When tempers flare, adrenaline fio,,,rs. Adrenaline increases heartand breathing rates) and launches our fight-or-flight response - in this case, theaggressive response. I t takes severallninutes for adrenaline. levels to recede, so tellingsomeone to go cool dO'wn for 20 minutes or so Inakes sense.ICeyTip 2You can' t change difficult employees. Their beha'vior 'whether it's ,,,rhining or sniping ortaking up too much ofyour time - is deeply rooted outside the office, and may have beengoing on for years. Instead, focus on ho'w their behavior is hurting their jobperformance.Key Tip 3Firing isn't the ansv,rer - neither is encouraging a difficult elnployee to quit. Both aretempting responses to frustrating behavior, but both can be expensive options. Look for,,,rays to use the annoying behavior productively. For exalnple, if there's a perpetualpessilnist on your staff, run new ideas by her to get a sense of objections that might beraised by others.ICeyTip 4I(eep the big picture in nlind. ''''hen you're dealing ,,,rith a difficult employee, your job isto solve a problem and advance the organization's goals - not to change the employee,lay blame or rnake the elnployee feel badly.SpecificsIt's best to deal ,vith frustrating people in the calmest, most collected "vay possible. Butbecause difficult employees' personalities valY so much, you have to choose the


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appropriate strategy for each type. Here are a fe,,\' of the personalities, and suggestions011 hov,r to keep theln froin dislupting your organization:

Profile: Often a perfectionist, this person is a professional at raining on evelyone1sparade. '''Tith her pessimislu and hopelessness, she makes everyone around he r feelnegative.Slogan: "That ,.yill never 'vork. IStrategy: Have cOlnpassion for her fear. Use her as a sounding board for ne'\v ideas, andconsider \vhether her objections have Inerit; her reactions lllay be indicators of-whato'ther people might say later.The Time ThiefProfile: Takes much lnore time than he should talking vdth you. Digressions, longexplanations and ''\Tardiness are frequent ''\Tants to keep you listening and talking.Slogan: "Just one more thing .. "Strategy: This person might no t really need your attention; but he feels as though hedoes. l\1ake it clear at the beginning of the conversation that you're happy to talk, butthat your thne is lilnited. Ask for the short version of the story.TIle Sarcastic SOl l l l d ..biterProfile: Makes sarcastic asides in public forUlns \,vhile others are talking. A heckler, averbal bully.Slogan: "Hey Frank, did that tie come 'Nith a free bowl of soup 711Strategy: If he interrupts your presentation, yot{. can ignore him or challenge hilU byasking a I1searchlight" question that luakes hhn defend the relevance of his COm111ents. Ifhe says something nasty about your tie ,,\rhile youIre in the Iniddle of a presentation, forexalnple, you can say, "''\That does nly tie have to do "vith this quarter's sales, Jiln?" It's abold maneuver, but ,.yith this comlnent you address the behavior and align yourself \'\rithth e organizationts goals.Caution: Don' t fight hiIn ,,,rith sarcasm, or you'll risk being lumped into the sanlecategory - difficult.TIle Gossip


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Profile: Suffers from grapevine-itis. Big ears. Bigger lllouth. Makes friends and allies bytalking behind co,vorkers' backs.Slogan: "Want to hear something juicy?"Strategy: Take the gossip aside and lnake hiln ' ' ' 7 a r e that you Imovl about his bad habit.Then explain ho," his lwhispering is danlaging the organization.The Angry Tiger

P r o f i l e ~ When frustrated, the angry tiger lashes out at those around her. Raises her voicefrequently, and uses aggressive body language.

Strategy: ,,\Then she confronts you, take control of the situation. Try to get her attention(repeatil).g her name might help), and slo\.y her dO''''ll. Let her kno'w' that you hear herfrustration by using elnpathetic statelnents such as, "That sounds frustrating!1 or "Iknnvv that you're '''10rldng hard on this. 1 When she begins to calm do-wn, ask her to takea break for a fevv minutes, and arrange a time to come back and talk about the probleln.Then, at a later, calmer time, talk to her about hovv her presentation of the problems ishurting her performance. Counseling lnay help solve this problenl, bu t don't suggest thison your-OV,1!1. Get advice froln your human resources director.Caution: Focus on ho\ anger is hurting the employee's performance. Don't makegeneralizations about any employee S character or alleged Inental problelns. YourhUlnan resources department can offer the employee an anger managelnent course orother services. But no one can force the elnployee to get help.FAQsAfter I tmish dealing ,,,,7jth frustrating employees, 1'111 the one ,,,,rho'sfrustrated. Ho,"" can I keep them from stressing me out so much?That's a tough question. Here are strategies that have proved effective for lnanymanagers:Do:

Breathe sI0,v1y through your nose Have phrases up your sleeve for dealing t \ ~ t h each difficult personality Listen to ,,,Th,at the elnployee is saying; there may be a ,vork-related basis for thegrIevance Ask the elnployee to generate a solution to the problem (but be ready ,vith one ofyour ovvn) IVIake the enlployee feel that she's been heard


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o Lay do\vn the lavv \vhen necessary, and be clear about 'vlhat is unacceptablebehavior Keep the big picture - the organization's success - illlnind

Take the behavior personally Accept all of the responsibility for ~ r e a t i n g a solution Bad-nlouth the eillployee Think of the employee in negative terms Invent Inotivations for the behaviorEmployees have been coming to me \vi.th complaints about Saln, \vho'sinfrunous for bialning other people for problems \vith his projects. Many ofhis cO\'\1orkers feel unfairly criticized and they are. ,\Vhat do I do?Although you have an opinion, don't take sides. Listen to the employees, but don't Inakeany explanations for Sam's behavior. It's okay to say something like, "I don't know \vhyhe's doing that." Then take Saln aside privately. Let him lulO,V that his behavior is aproblem, and ask him \'\1hy he feels that he's no t getting enough support (or \-vhatever hisconlplaints center on). Get hhn to explain the problem, rather than lay blaIne.ResourceBookBrinkman, Rick and Rick Kirschner, Dealing wi th People You Can't Stand: How toBring out the Best in People at Their Worst. l\1cGravv-Hill} 1994.

'Vorkplace Options. (Revie\ved 2012). Difficult employees. Raleigh, NC: Author.


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Keeping Conflicts ConstructiveAll too often, disagreements alnong group Inembers aren't resolved in a healthy manner.People Inay leave lneetings feeling hurt, misunderstood, or alienated. Conflicts linger,creating tension, and disrupting ,,,,orIe.

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Disagreements are inevitable)' a professional counselor tells how to make themb e n e f i c ~ a l .

If you've ever ,,,forked ,t\rith a team ofpeople, you Imo\v that conflict is inevitable. But youmay not know that conflict can be constructive.All too often, disagreements among group members aren 't resolved in a healthy manner.People may leave meetings feeling hurt, misunderstood, 01' alienated. Conflicts linger,creating tension, and disrupting 'vork.While ,ve can't stop disagreements froln happening, 'oVe can use conflicts as assets-tostrengthen relationships, Inake sounder group decisions; and motivate lnembers.Using conflict. constructively requires that all group lllembers practice basic groundrules of conflict Inanagement. \tVithout lnutual practice of these principles, conflict canbecolne destructive and dovvnright.ugly. Or just as dalnaging, controversial issues Inaybe sidestepped just to keep the peace. If your team has spiraled do\"r:tl tillS abyss in thepast, it may take some time and effort to correct the probleill.But these ideas \-\1).11 \'\1ork if the group is comIll tted to thein. To Inake conflictconstructive, each member should fo11o\-\T these guidelines:

Express disagreelnent. Be sensitive. Criticize the idea, not the person. Don't be defensive.

Express disagreement.Group melnbers must first decide they're going to be honest 'with one another. Thismeans that ,"hen they have differing vie'ws, they'll express those disagreelnents insteadof renlaining silent. (This isn't an invitation, ho,\veve1', to say,vhatever you 'want-'wellldiscuss that shortly,)


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But by not speaking up ,,,,hen you disagree, you deprive the group of potentially valuableinsight that Inight redirect ho,,\r problems are solved or important decisions are made.You could even say that by not spealdng up, you're decei'ving the group because yoursilence may be seen as agreement.Group leaders need to encourage open forums, ,vhere disagreelnent is freely expressed.If leaders seenl insecure about contrary ideas being expressed, they can't expect muchhonepty among members.In turn , group members are likely to COlne avvay f e e l i ~ g dissatisfied because their vie,vsaren't being heard. It also greatly reduces the effectiveness of decision Inaking vv-hen allideas aren't considered.Be sensitive.As you express disagreenlents, be a'w-are that the ,-vords you choose can affect listenerspositively or negatively,For instance, in a class on group cOlnmunication that I ,,,'as teaching, a ,,,roman madethis bold statement: "Men don't listen '''Tell in conversation." It lnay have been an honestexpression of her opinion, bu t it certainly V'lasn't sensitive to the men in the group.Instead she could have made a general statement such as, "I find it difficult '''Thensomeone rin talkiligto doesn't listen '''TelL'' This captures the essence ofV\That she ,,,rantsto say, but doesn't push emotional buttons for those in the gl;OUp. And pushingelnotional buttons ,vill inevitably derail you from the topic at hand and createunnecessary tens.ion among group members.Considering your vv-ords carefully is more than just being politically correct. I t'sextending consideration to those around you. Your disagreements have a greater chanceof being heard '''Then you phrase theln sensitively.Criticize the idea, not the person.Express your disagreements in a w'ay that doesn't devalue the person ,vith whom youdisagree. For an example of hOV\T this can be done ,veIl, here's an anecdote froin ameeting I attended recently:A man had just finished explaining a project proposal to a committee. A cOlnlnitteemember ,-vho ,vas opposed to the proposal responded, "0ne significant fla,,,r in yourproposal is that it excludes lo\-ver incollle families from participating in the prograln, dueto cost. ,'\That can be done to include them?"The mmnber "who raised the question may have \vanted to say something like; 1I,,\1\,7hO'8the bonehead 'who caIne up with this idea?" Instead, he addressed the issue and didn'tattack the person. As a result, the discussion moved forward productively.


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If your goal is to use conflict to build a more cohesive group, don't allovvpersonal attacksor nalne calling to infiltrate your relationships. That ,tVill only escalate conflicts andcause people to choose sides.If conflicts degenerate into personal attacks, you need to interrupt the conversations,make your point about such behavior being counterproductive, and ask the people torestate their disagreements by focusing on the issues. This ,ill set a precedent fordiscussions. Practice this as often as needed, and group lnembers ,ill learn to expresstheir disagi'eements openly because they'll feel safe from verbal attacks.Don't be defensive.\l\Then you're on the receiving end of disagreelnents, you can feel defensive even if thepeople aren't attacking you.But often, the people disagreeing simply aren' t grasping your point. So rather thanleaping to defend your positions, listen carefully to other people's relnarks. Ask theln tosummarize your main points. This gives you chances to pinpoint possibleInisunderstandings and clarify your positions.This is a difficult skill to Inaster. People don't like to be told they're 'wTong-includingme.At a '''Torkshop I ,vas conducting, a participant interrupted me and accused me of beingnarro'\v. 1\1y first thought ,,,ras to defend my point and move on ,,,rith lny Inateria1.Instead, I took a break froln my presentation and asked her some questions.""\Vhat is your main concern ,vith the idea rln presenting?" I asked. She responded ,,,rithseveral objections, and the Inore she talked, the more she seemed to distort what I said.So I asked, tlWhat did you hear 1ne say?" She paraphrased my comlnents in her o,,,rn'''Tords-to "vhich I replied, HI think you misunderstood \vhat I ,,,Tas trying to say."Then I restated my point concisely, asked her if this made sense and moved on. Idiffused the conflict by entering into it instead of trying to sidestep it.By asking questions of those "vho disagree ,tVith you, 11e,,,' ideas and suggestions getthro"vn into conversations. These may lead to creative solutions that hadnlt beenconsidered.And if your idea eventually falls flat-so ""hat? By in"viting discussions, you've Inoved theprocesses fonvard in positive "ways that defensive reactions could never haveaccomplished.You can Inake conflicts "vork for your tealn, but it takes a commitlnent from all groupmembers. Each person Inust agree to honestly state disagreements, in a sensitive


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manner that focuses on the ideas, not the people. Approached in this WHY, conflicts canbe one of your greatest assets. .

Gilles, G. (Review'ed 2012). Keeping conflicts constructive. Raleigh, NC: WorkplaceOptions. .


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WHAT'S YO.U R EEF?MANAGING CONFLICT"IN THE WORI(PLACE

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workplace bullying and disruptive behavior: what everyone needs to know

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