wireless magazine - april/may - wales

FALL OUT BOY

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THE KINGS OF THE SCENE ARE BACK TO RECLAIM THEIR CROWN.

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Spank me silly and call me a Jessie, it’s nearly hometime. Yep, we’re into the final furlong of a year in uni already. We’re not just tooting our own horn (Prince-style, Google it), but this really is a kick-arse issue. We’ve taken a trip back in time to hang out with emo legends Fall Out Boy, stopped by number one alley with Bastille, had tea and crumpets with indie hero Gaz Coombes, and then hit the trailer parks with the awesome Seasick Steve. Not to mention a chat with the brilliant Deap Vally, and a live performance from our favourite three ladies in the world (behind Stooshe, obv) Stealing Sheep, through Layar. AND it’s our festival special too! Bleedin nora, we’re good to you...

In this issue....

This publication is aimed at people over the age of 18, due to the nature

of its content. If you are under 18, we suggest you put this magazine down and pick up a copy of Kerrang or Seventeen or something. Sorry about that, our lawyers told us to tell you.

Whilst every care has been taken to ensure that the data in this publication is accurate, neither the publisher nor its editorial contributors can accept any liability to any party or loss or damage caused by errors or omissions resulting from negligence, accident or any other cause.

Also in this

issue....

PUBLISHED BY UK STUDENT MEDIA LTDTelephone 0151 345 3803

Advertising: [email protected]

Editorial: [email protected]

Editor: Andy Scott Sub-editor: Joseph SmithContributors: Clare Barry, Gazz Wood, Steve Jordan, Ian Pemberton, Nathan Simm, Rachel Horner, Michael Glynn, Oliver Catherall, Dave Lightfoot, Tom Johnson, Phil Millar, Chris Welsh, Joe Lanigan SmithDesign: Andy Scott, Rob Armstrong, Chris LawPhotos: Oliver Catherall, Matt @ Manic Photography, Chuff Media

April/May 2013 Edition

This issue was largely influenced by a three hour candlelight vigil dedicated to the memory of Britain’s 4 biggest icons, JLS. Oh & Brooklyn beer, loads of that too.

Big thanks to: Gordon & Paul at Zeitgeist, all the lovely people at Chuff Media, Seb at DigiDJ, Kara at SJM, Bex Hawley, Rob at Sonic PR, Ella at Full Fat, Katherine at Warner, Nick at Cool Delta, Claire at Atlantic, Hayley at Little Press, Hettie at Halfords, Bob Newton, sorry to anyone we forgot – we love you all.

NEWS - GAZ COOMBES - GAMES REVIEWCHEAP DAY OUT - LATEST FILMSFESTIVAL ESSENTIALS - COMPETITIONSWHAT’S ON GUIDE - MUCH MORE...

This Month, We Will Be... 06

Fall Out Boy Interview 11-13

Seasick Steve Interview16-17

The F**k It List...18-19

Bastille Interview21-23

Stealing Sheep Interview 24

Festivals:Best Of The Rest 32-33

Festivals: The Big Ones28-31

Get The Look: Festivals36-39

Deap Vally Interview 50-51

The Mass Debate: Anecdotes 42-43

Wireless Magazine (Wales) ISSN 2051-023303

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04

NEWS

A Swedish court has ordered indie rock band the Hives to repay £1.8 million that they acquired from the profits of 90s girl group The Cardigans. The band received the amount from Tambourine Studios, which managed both of the bands finances. However, The Hives were under the impression that they made the money themselves and are expected to appeal the decision.

The Hives to Repay£1.8M ‘Loan’ FromThe Cardigans

Meditation Could Help Student Test Scores

Stalker Throws Pube Razor at Hugh Jackman

App to Prevent Incest in Iceland

The meditation journal Mindfulness has published a study which seems to show that students who practice Zen get higher grades. In experiments conducted with students from California, it was found that students who meditated before class were able to concentrate

and focus for longer. The results evenenabled the researchers to predict which students would pass & fail a quiz.

A Hugh Jackman fan has reportedly thrown a used razor full of pubic hair at the actor while he was at the gym. The stalker a p p a r e n t l y m a n a g e d

to sneak past the gym’s receptionist before declaring her love for the actor and throwing the razor which she concealed in her waistband. A 47-year-old woman was later arrested by police and charged with stalking.

A new Icelandic smart phone App has been designed to help users make sure their date isn’t a family member. The Islendingabok has

data on 720,000 people in the country and can tell how closely two people are related by just bumping their phones together. Unfortunately the program

came too late for one user who recalled an unfortunate incident with his aunt on the app’s website. Not good.

All Star GreatGatsby Soundtrack Released on May 6thThe star-laden soundtrack to the forthcoming Great Gatsby movie is to be released in May, and snippets of each track are now available on Youtube. The list of artists appearing on the album includes Will.i.am, Florence and the Machine, Lana Del Ray, Jay Z, Jack White, Bryan Ferry, Emeli Sande, Gotye and The xx. The soundtrack is also going to feature Beyonce and Andre 3000 collaborating on what they promise to be a very different take on Amy Winehouse’s ‘Back to Black’. The Great Gatsby is expected to be released in May.

05

This month, we will be mostly...

Droves – You’re My LungsReleased 3rd May

The North West’s finest

punk quintet have been gigging relentlessly for the last few years, and it’s no surprise that their latest EP is something of a masterclass in writing quality guitar anthems that make you want to both sing along and punch passers-by in equal measure. Tracks like Burn It Up and Lets Go could easily sit alongside the likes of NOFX or Wilhelm Scream on any noisy sun-induced playlist...

Loveable Rogues – What A NightReleased 22nd April

Well this is just a catchy bastard of a

song that the cool kid in you really doesn’t want to like, but unfortunately the part of you that enjoys dancing around like a bellend absolutely loves. And with the chorus mantra “We wanna drink and party, make love, make money“, it’s hard to disagree...

Frank Turner – Tape Deck Heartreleased 22nd April

We love Frank here at Wireless HQ. And what’s

not to like? Lyrically unrivalled and musically able to get even the most unenthusiastic, boring sod tapping their toes, it’s quality folk rock delivered

minus the pretension of your Mumfords and Lumineers. Excellent lead single Recovery just scratches the surface of what could easily be the soundtrack to many a summer.

The Coral – The Coral

The best thing to come out of Merseyside since John Parrott, The Coral’s self titled debut still sounds as fresh today as it did when it first came out. With a distinctive skiffle sound that was adopted by many of their contemporaries they created their own scene in the early 00’s which helped spawn the likes of The Zutons to fame. Stand out tracks include Skeleton Key,

Dreaming Of You & Simon Diamond.

21 and Over in cinemas 3rd May

If you like your movie

characters daft, drunken and with their arses out, then this is almost certainly the film for you. Written by the same guys who brought you The Hangover, it tells the story of Jeff Chang, a junior doctor who really really likes to party, celebrating his birthday in style. No it probably won’t win any Oscars, but it’ll have you laughing and cringing in your seat for a good 93 minutes.

Far Cry 3 : Blood Dragon Out 1st May

Remember how great Far Cry 3 was a few months ago? Remember how awesome

80s action movies are? Are you thinking how amazing it would be if those two were mixed together? Keep on thinkin, because that’s what this is! You are cyborg super soldier Sergeant Rex Power Colt in a neon 80s VHS kill-fest!

ArrestedDevelopmentout 26th May(on Netflix)

We, like many many of you, are incredibly

excited about this one. The Bluth family have entertained us with three awesome non-faltering series’ of comedy genius and terrible chicken impressions, and after what feels like years (7 years, in fact) they are back to our screens. Well actually, they are back to our computer screens, as this is being launched exclusively on TV streaming site Netflix. It’ll almost certainly be worth the six quid (or free trial) though.

Of Exams

Yes, we all know they are for the greater good and they’ll all be over soon. But who needs this kind of stress eh? This uni lark isn’t like it is on Van Wilder: Party Liason is it? Where’s Ryan Reynolds when you need him?

...listening to

...and a classic

...going to see

...watching

...Sick & Tired

...playing

06

A QUICK WORD WITH:GAZ COOMBES

Gaz is on tour now. For dates visit www.gazcoombes.comThe debut album “Here Come The Bombs” is out 21ST MAY

Since 2010 you’ve been doing your own thing and playing solo. In what sense do you think that your music changed since you went solo?

It’s a kind of different with my voice; you get this kind of combined singular voice with a great band behind you. It’s just a really kind of new thing, it’s very special and it’s really raw and I really enjoy doing it.

Are you looking forward to getting out on the road in April?

I’ve been in the studio since Christmas and so I’m desperate to get out of the studio for a bit. Feed some new songs into the set for the crowd to check out and some old favorites. We might even play some Supergrass songs, it’ll be a great set.

Was the desire to perform to crowds still there after Supergrass split up?

You know it’s hard it’s something that you want. It goes beyond reason, I’m really passionate about performing and I always love it. I write everyday and its part of my life and it keeps my soul happy! It’s what I love doing and I love being close to the fans, so yeah it was.

What have you got planned for the rest of 2013?

There are some festivals and obviously the tour as well; I’m playing at Hop Farm which I’m really excited about and last time I played there I met Neil Young. That was obviously massive for me! I was really star struck!

WORDS BY JOE LANIGAN SMITH

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07

Out: May 17 On: PS3, Xbox 360, PC

In the underground ruins of post-apocalyptic Moscow’s Metro system, mankind struggles to survive in the darkness. Artyom fights other survivors and disturbing mutants to control a powerful weapon. Sequel to criminally underrated Metro 2033, this game will completely immerse you in its creepy world with a massive amount of detail and control, get ready to experience life in the Metro.

Metro:Last Light

Out: May 1st On: PS3, Xbox 360, PC

Remember how great Far Cry 3 was a few months ago? Remember how awesome 80s action movies are? Are you thinking how amazing it would be if those two were mixed together? Then Think no more, ever, because thats what this is! You are cyborg super soldier Sergeant Rex Power Colt in a neon 80s VHS kill-fest!Check out the game’s deliciously retro cartoon-style trailer on youtube now. It looks Ace!

Far Cry 3:Blood Dragon

Review

Lego CityLego City: Undercover is a Wii U exclusive! What’s the Wii U you ask? It’s the latest console from Nintendo of course!

Set in...you guessed it, Lego City, you play as police officer Chase McCain as he goes undercover on the hunt for notorious villain, Rex Fury. What follows is a surprisingly funny story that mashes up pop culture & cop show clichés.

The game itself plays out like a Lego version of Grand Theft Auto, producing all the joys of open-world sandbox exploration, like running over people & smashing through the wide array of destructible scenery. Dotted around the city are mind-boggling amounts of collectables like different character skins & vehicles. The characters have their own skill classes like the criminal class can break locks & then get into safes whilst the farmer can use a chicken to hold onto & glide from buildings. Kind of like real life, then?

Like other Lego games, there are also the usual platforming levels where you collect bolts and complete objectives. All in all, it isn’t very challenging and the gameplay is very simplistic, but this is to be expected considering the target audience. The Wii U controller is used to good effect though as a communicator and a scanner through the wonders of motion sensors. You can use it to find criminals, take photographs of crime and it doubles up as a handy map of the city.

Lego City: Undercover is a good old-fashioned game where simplicity, accessibility & fun are the order of the day. Yes, the graphics are a bit dated. Yes, it’s a bit easy and you can’t go around cutting people up and killing hookers, but you won’t be able to turn it off once you start exploring. A must have for Wii U owners.

Out: NOW Platform: Wii U

Words: Ian Pemberton & Phil Millar

08

HHHHDAILY STAR SUNDAY

HHHH

HHHHHHHHSUGARSCAPE MORE!

ZOO

FROM THE WRITERS OF‘THE HANGOVER’

IN CINEMAS MAY 3

15 CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE, SEX REFERENCES, NUDITY AND SOFT DRUG USE

TICKETS

Scan the QR code to find dates, times & venues or visitwww.wirelessmag.co.uk/tickets for full listings...

Derren Brown: Infamous

Tom Odell

Russell Howard: Wonderbox

Jason Manford: Work In Progress

Muse

Stereophonics

CHVRCHES

Savages

Robbie Williams

Sigur Ros

Derren Brown returns to London’s West End with a brand new live show. Touring April – August 2013

Various venues across the country. Touring May – October 2013

Various venues across the country. Touring February – April 2014

Various venues across the country. Touring June – August 2013

Various venues across the country. Touring April & May 2013

Various venues across the country. Touring June & July 2013

Liverpool Sound City & various venues across the country. Touring May 2013

Various festivals & venues across the country. Touring August – November 2013

Various festivals & venues across the country. Touring May – November 2013

Nottingham, Brighton, London. Touring November 2013

TICKET SHOP

10

Interv

iew

Words: Clare Barry

When you hear the name “Fall

Out Boy” it’s far too easy to experience a miniature time warp back to 2005. Back when the band had seemingly brainwashed half of the teenagers on the planet with their melodic take on “pop-punk” and (at the time) boundary pushing use of hair straighteners and eye-liner. In 2013, after having been on hiatus for four years with no hint of returning any time soon, their sudden and surprising return felt like a throw-back to their cult-like response eight years earlier. With no warning, a chain reaction of hysteria from thousands of die-hard fans erupted on the Twittersphere mere minutes after their come-back single “Light ‘Em Up” was surreptitiously uploaded to Youtube, leaving the rest of the country saying: “Wait, what?”

We managed to catch the bands most notable member, bassist and lyricist Pete Wentz, who couldn’t help but laugh about the come-back response thus far: “We’ve had some crazy reactions - especially in Japan - but I still think that

the strangest reactions we get are when we meet people and they just stand back, go pale and say: ‘Shut up. Shut up. No way!’ And then they just look at you a bunch- say ‘Shut up’ a whole bunch more and you have no idea how to respond to them. It’s kind of like they’re looking at a ghost or something, just complete disbelief. It’s totally weird.”

Having infamously mocked themselves and their band image in their own music videos in the past (“What the hell happened to rock and roll? Eye-liner, energy drinks and no guitar solos? I’ve taken shits with bigger rock stars than them”) fans did not know what to expect

upon finding out their album was confidently called “Save Rock and Roll”. Pete notes that they are definitely poking fun at themselves, but admits there is a reason: “Does anybody know what Rock and Roll is these days? I think that is the point of it. We’ve always been ironic and not taken ourselves too seriously. We’re aware that the comeback could have been taken differently by critics - you know, like “What do these guys think they are going to do? Come back and save rock and roll?” However from our perspective rock and roll is meant to be different and surprising. That’s why this time round was so fun for us - because we did it in secret, nobody had any expectations and that meant we could get back to making music for the sake of music.”

Critics did, however, respond coldly to the comeback in

This time round was so fun for us - because we did it in secret, nobody had any expectations"

11

contrast to the legion of hysterical fans, most claiming the reunion was inevitable after the feeble response the members had to their individual music projects. When asked how they felt about comments like that, Wentz laughed: “It’s just people’s opinions - they’re critics, they criticize art and we’re musicians, we make art. It’s kind of like asking a tree if it cares about a shark. That being said I have to stress there is no reason or urge to come back other than creating new music. We had several offers to come back that got turned down. If we were doing this band because of money or critical acclaim this is not how we would do it. If you come to the shows, the kids that are there are the reason we are out there playing music. There is more to this stuff than impressing critics and I think every artist knows that.”

The overwhelming response actually encouraged the band to move their album release date forward by a month. Then the band completely disregarded the release date and surprised everybody by streaming the entire album online for free - again, without warning. The band’s increase in popularity was almost parallel to the rise in use of social networking

sites like MySpace (RIP) and Facebook. Wentz himself had many encounters with the viral nature of social networking - including getting into trouble

over things he had shared online and notoriously having nude pictures of himself leaked and shared across the world in fifteen minutes flat. Being a band that had risen to fame during the initial wave of social media’s effect on the music industry, Wentz notes the influx of technology both helped and hindered their career: “I think, without a doubt, before social media - peer to peer downloading helped our band. Our band was born in dorm rooms and people sneaking music round the internet. As far as social networking goes, it’s fun to be at the forefront. Used correctly, the sites are great - but I think a lot of people only

know how to misuse them. I really think it’s great how it levels the playing field for accessing information, but the poor side of it is how fast people can broadcast the wrong information and easily mislead people.” On a personal note he adds: “It is easy to end up in a social media echo chamber when you’re in the public eye, where you just talk about yourself. Then people start reporting about you talking on yourself and you start talking about how you wish people wouldn’t talk about you and you want your privacy. Then they report on you wanting your privacy. It creates an endless loop of depression and problems. To

To me, listening to people who are in successful bands or who are actors complain about their privacy is just boring. Their life isn't that hard, you know?"

Picture: Pamela Littky

12

me, listening to people who are in successful bands or who are actors complain about their privacy is just boring. It’s like listening to people complain that sandpaper is too rough. Their life isn’t that hard, you know? I’ve definitely been a part of that before and thankfully my friends helped me get out of it.”

According to the band, they did a lot of growing up away from the public eye -which helped them deal with the pressures of fame. This, they claim, has been a positive influence both for them and the music: “When you’re young you can tend to throw perspective out the

window, having a megaphone to broadcast your emotions without considering the magnifying glass the lyrics and whatnot are going to be under. Time has given us that. The songs are definitely informed by that journey - the focus on ‘burning it to the ground’ is great. I think that everybody should do that once in a while, it’s healthy.”

When discussing the album Wentz claimed to “feel like fainting” when he found out Elton John would collaborate for the song on the album he describes as the “flagship” track: Save Rock and Roll: “I just... I didn’t know what to do. It fit perfectly, because Elton John - he’s kind of the king of the sentiment we were trying to express. The nature of our band has been a constant adaption. It’s not

necessarily adapting for the sake of adapting, but that’s what keeps it interesting for you as an artist. Once you’ve made the perfect album, then you just stop... You don’t franchise it and turn it into McDonalds - but no one could make the perfect album. For us, it’s constantly changing and constantly evolving and we’re inspired by different things in different ways. That skews all the songs in different directions, and finding a medium between all of our tastes inevitably creates something new and exciting, every time. Also it’s like ‘why play it safe?’ - according to us ambition is probably the best strength there is out there.”

Wentz finishes on a modest note: “When we came back we honestly didn’t think that anybody would even care. We have tried to take what was good about Fall Out Boy in the past, but come back as if we were 18 again and we were a brand new band. Every show we have played we’re just unbelievably grateful and surprised every time that people turn up. We’re doing this for fun, now - we just hope people enjoy it.”

“Save Rock and Roll” is available now to listen, buy & download, and fans eagerly anticipate the band’s appearances at Reading and Leeds Festival in August.

Every show we have played we're just unbelievably grateful and surprised every time that people turn up."

13

Students & Teacher

Learning the BasicsTaking a Tumble

Getting the Hang of it! Cracked it!!!

cheap DAY OUTWe sent Rachel Horner, Michael Glynn and Oliver Catherall, to Central Skatepark

(Manchester) for some expert skateboarding tuition from instructor Eddie Belvedere, courtesy of the Black Sheep Skate Shop. (Find out more atwww.blacksheepstore.co.uk )

Here’s how they got on...

14

“I never particularly wanted to play by myself, because it’s so boring.”

It’s been over six years since the artist known as Sea Sick Steve appeared on Jools Holland’s New Years Eve show, and the country was captivated by the figure of one scruffy old dude

playing the house down with little more than 3 guitar strings. Equally captivating was Steve’s hobo back story, which was perhaps played up a bit by the media who chose to ignore his successful 20 year career as a producer and sound engineer.

By 2008 Steve could afford to hire his old friend Dan Magnusson to play drums and since then Sea Sick Steve has been a travelling band. The new album ‘Hubcap Music’ perhaps has the biggest sound to date, which isn’t surprising considering that it features Jack White and John Paul Jones.

“Basically every song is just me, Dan hitting the drums and John playing the bass.

“I haven’t played by myself in about five years. I’ve been playing with Dan

and ninety percent of the gigs we’ve done have been with a band.

WORDS: Joseph S

mith

I N T E R V I E W

John started playing with us a couple of years ago.”

Hub Cap Music, named after a bizarre instrument consisting of car parts, features the Led Zepplin bassist on practically every song. In the past John has been part of the Sea Sick live band so it looks likely that you’ll be able to see more of him at Steve’s upcoming shows (“He said he’s gonna come! I don’t know what he’s doing right now, I heard he’s making an opera”). The other big name on the album features much more briefly but no less notably:

“My son said right away he can tell when it’s Jack playing. Jack’s like one of the only people out there who interests me, he’s so... on the edge of his own thing. He keeps putting himself out there. I

was so happy for him when he made that Blunderbuss album, it was such an amazing record.

“He came in and played something... strange. He came with all kinds of different pedals and magic and made the most amazing sounds.”

As well as a love for hardcore blues, Steve seems to share Jack White’s love for old school recording techniques. In a press release which was charmingly handwritten and scanned by the man himself, Sea Sick is keen to point out that the record was recorded and mixed on tape and printed straight to vinyl with no computers involved at all. Those unfamiliar with Steve’s

sound engineering background may be surprised to find that he has produced all of his records to date. His past work saw him brushing shoulders with Kurt Cobain in the 80s and he produced several early releases for Modest Mouse. Don’t let the beat up guitars fool you, this guy knows his way around a studio.

One of the most striking tracks on Hub Cap Music is Purple Shadows, a sweet country duet featuring singer Elizabeth Cook, a massive country star who is decidedly less well-known in the UK. Steve was delighted to hear it was our favourite:

“You know what, that’s my favourite song too! And you know I first met her [Elizabeth] up in Scotland. We were playing this big theatre

in Perth. She’s kind of really famous over here. She has her own radio show.”

In drastic contrast to the souped-up delta blues of the

rest of the record, the song which will surprise fans most is unquestionably Coast Is Clear:

“Ha! A lot of people probably ain’t gonna like that one. It’s funny. I made that song on my three string guitar, and I don’t make pretty songs, nothing pretty comes out of that piece of shit. I wrote it for my wife and she wasn’t that impressed so I just kind of forgot about it. But when it came time to make the record, it came back to my brain again, and I thought about that song ‘Whiter Shade of Pale’ and it sounds nothing like that song but I wanted that old 60s kind of organ. And then suddenly it was like ‘oh... now I can see it’. I was really surprised but I’m real happy with it. I didn’t even know I could make music like that!”

The excellent album finisher features huge organ sounds and epic gospel choir backing, taking it to a place which borders on soul. To say the least, it’s a far cry from that three string Jools Holland performance which triggered his breakthrough.

Hubcap Music will be released on Fiction Records on 29th April.

I never particularly wanted to play by myself, because it's so boring."

"

17

A friend of mine is just a couple of weeks away from expatriating himself from this fair isle and moving to another, very similar one below the equator.

He managed to get into New Zealand on a cheeky commonwealth visa exchange deal, so he’s off to work a terrible office job among the Kiwis and hobbits and so forth.

Knowing that you’re about to leave the country is a bit like handing in your notice at work.

You just sort of check out, because no matter how shit at your job you are now it doesn’t matter. They’re not gonna sack you, so you just get left alone to wallow and run out the clock.

I suspect it’s that very feeling which entered my friend’s head the other night in the pub. It’s our local, which we’ve been drinking in steadily for

more than ten years. Another of our group is the pub quiz master, one of the lads used to work there. We’ve got ties, is what I’m saying.

We were sat in our usual corner drinking our usual drinks, when we became just that perfect level of drunk to feel like a bit of a sing song might not be out of the question.

Except it was, because moments into a rendition of the theme from Saved by the Bell: The College Years, we’re told in no uncertain terms by a barmaid that we were to shut up. There were still people eating in the food bit of the pub (despite it being half eleven on a Saturday night) and obviously they’d not been informed they were in a pub.

They must’ve assumed, when they rang to make their booking, that The Red Lion was a Russian bistro of some sort.Either that or they’d never been in a pub before and so were unprepared for the fact that there might be drunk people there.

We were annoyed by this, and several other things that had been mounting which I won’t go into, but we complained and muttered and carried on drinking our drinks.

Then my mate sang the first line of Bohemian Rhapsody. “Mama...” he crooned at around normal speaking volume. That was the last straw for the barmaid, and then the landlord. Despite our years of long service and the literal thousands we’ve poured into the pub, we were given no benefit of the doubt and no mercy.

“Shut Up! People have complained!” came the cry from the red-faced publican.

If people had complained, they’d done it very sneakily because you’d have had to walk right by me to get to the bar. Being told to shut up by someone who could have built an extra floor onto his house thanks to the money he’s raked in off you must’ve been the final straw for my friend,

THEF**K

ITLIST

Words - Gazz Wood

18

because he got this glint in his eye. This sort of spark went off, and from there on everything went a bit “Falling Down.”

He stood up and put his coat on. Was he going to walk out? Not quite. He was going to be thrown out.

Holding his arms out to his sides like Jesus on the cross, my mate sang the final bar of Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of his fucking lungs. “Nothing really matters...” His brother got between him and the landlord so he couldn’t be physically accosted. “...anyone can see!” People were certainly going to complain now, and the barmaid from earlier was utterly disgusted that her words had not been heeded to.

That’s what happens when you give someone young a position of power. They go mad with it.

“Nothing really matters... nothing really matters... to me!”

TISH!

Then we were gone. My friend and his brother were removed, and I removed myself in a show of solidarity, as did a blameless school friend who hadn’t been singing at all, but felt that what had happened was wrong!

We walked out of the pub with our heads held high, and my friend had scratched an item off his Fuck It List.

By the time he returns from New Zealand that landlord will be gone, and probably so too will be the barmaid.

Till then we’ll all start drinking somewhere else, down the road, where loyal custom is more valued...

Here’s some ideas posted on our Facebook page - facebook.com/wireless magazine...“Post a shit into a letter box.”

“If I was leaving my job (and didn’t need a reference) I would go in with a deckchair, cocktail, Hawaiian shirt and sit until removed.”

“Poo in some shoes.”

“When I worked in McDonalds an obese woman asked a colleague “Could I have Two large big tasty meals with a milkshake” and he said “well... no. I think you probably shouldn’t” then walked out never to return. I can’t remember his name but I just call him “Captain Awesome”.

Tweet @wirelessuk #fuckitlist and tell us what’s on YOUR list!

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19

InterviewWORDS: CLARE BARRY

M eeting Bastille mere hours before their debut show in a nationally sold out tour - one would think they had

just walked into the someone’s livingroom, rather than the dressing room of a band that had only just fallen short for the UK’s No.1 single (narrowly losing out to Justin Timberlake). In a few days, the release of their debut album would propel them to pole position in the British Album Charts. Lounging on sofas, eating crisps and bopping around to ridiculously cheesy garage tracks from various girl groups of the 90’s (“This is DEFINITELY going in the mix-tape, mate, definitely.”)- the front man, founder and song writer Dan Smith urgently jumped up to shake my hand, before speaking to us with the eccentrically witty bassist of the group, Will Farquarson.

“It’s bizarre” says Dan, who started Bastille alone by recording demos including “Flaws” and “Laura Palmer” in his bedroom in London, 2010. “I think we’re just as surprised as you are. It’s totally ridiculous. “It’s mental to think that it’s gone from there to this. I mean the chart thing is just a bit stupid. We never, ever would have imagined this situation”

“Even a week ago,” cuts in Farquarson, and they both laugh: “It was surreal. We were in the middle of doing other things yesterday. When I got home it suddenly, sort of sunk in.”

“It’s bizarre. We never, ever

would have imagined this

situation”

21

Smith notes that there really was no time to celebrate: “We had this mad day, where we found out in the morning - and then we were off doing this shoot with David Bailey (really famous photographer) which, in itself, was quite surreal.”

“I phoned my Dad when I got in,” chimes Farquarson, amused. “He didn’t even seem that impressed. He was like “Yeah, cool.” He actually seemed more impressed about the photo shoot. Dad’s from the sixties. David Bailey was the guy back then.”

The band’s chemistry is blindingly apparent the second you step into a room with them. Now the four members - Smith, Farquarson, Chris “Woody” Woodson and the notorious Kyle Simmons - have to get to grips travelling with an entire crew for the first time. Dan seems particularly excited about it: “It’s our first ever tour in a proper tour bus, which we are sleeping in - so there are twelve of us sleeping in this two story coach together.“When you first meet someone,

or people you don’t know that well, sitting on their lap for three hours is a good ‘getting-to-know-you’ exercise.”

They remained particularly tight-lipped on their up-coming festival appearances - and rightly so. Before the interview, they expressed concern that they “might not

be invited to Glastonbury this year”. Cautiously apologising to the camera and noting that everybody in the band “has DEFINITELY bought a ticket this year”, Smith explains their concern: “A couple of years ago we got offered two very small slots at Glastonbury but it was very last minute. I had a ticket and I was going anyway- but we couldn’t get Kyle a ticket - so he had to be broken into Glastonbury.” His voice drops: “In the back of a sofa, which was in the back of a Lorry.”

Farquarson, however, laughs: “And then they snipped off the ends of the tags of everyone else’s wrist bands- sewed them together to

make a fake wrist band and Kyle then put a little bit of mud where the plastic thing would be. Genius.”

Smith again, pulls a concerned face: “Just to clarify, it wasn’t us that broke him in and it wasn’t us that faked his wrist band. I bought a ticket to Glastonbury that year. And I have this year as well. And then Kyle got kicked out so it all ended really well.”

They claim that the twenty tracks on the extended version of their album “Bad Blood” is,

Kyle Simmons

“When you first meet someone,

or people you don’t know

that well, sitting on their lap fo

r three hours is a good

‘getting-to-know-you’ exercise

.”

“We couldn’t get Kyle a ticket, so he had to be broken into Glastonbury. In the back of a sofa, which was in the back of a Lorry”

22

more or less, the band’s entire body of work: “Trying to pick what songs are going on the album is a weird experience and a difficult one as well because you have to play up to people who already know and like your stuff - and appeal to people who are maybe going to come on board as well.” Fans however can also find more Bastille material by downloading the two-part free mixtape: “Other People’s Heartache”

“The mixtapes were a process - there were things I wanted to be on there. There was a “hit list” of things that we wanted. All of it is a bit of a joke, though - for example; the quotes from “Psycho” in “No Scrubs” meant to position Norman Bates as - a bit of a “scrub”. Pop music is very simple, which makes many songs interchangeable. The same four chords work over most songs. A lot of the songs we covered are potentially light pop songs that we tried to make really depressing or heavy. While, you know, not going too much up our own arses.”

It would be hard to imagine Bastille as “up their own arses” though, when every answer is laced with modesty and an undeniable sense of humour. With a noticeable lack of guitar in most of their songs, the band had to find a new way to present their songs acoustically, and openly devote part of their musical success to someone you might not expect:

“We’re quite hard on ourselves,” says Dan. “The production and all the other elements are really important but I hope we never let any song get to a point where the core of the song alone isn’t good enough. We don’t have any guitars on the album and we can’t use a piano or a keyboard in the middle of nowhere. Replicating the beats in clicks and claps and the vocals coming from just us was a really fun challenge. There were definite moments of A) This sounds awful and B) What the hell are we doing?” He shakes his head. “When we first did it - there was a copy of Jordan’s autobiography left in the rehearsal room”

“Which is a BRILLIANT read” interrupts Farquarson, “It really is.”

“it became a fundamental part of it. Woody would sit with it on his lap and use it as part of the drum beat.”

Farquarson remains straight faced: “Jordan has helped me in every aspect of my life.

I, Will Farquarson, would like to announce to the world - that Jordan, also known as Katie Price, has enriched my life and my experience in this world.”

“Bad Blood” is now available to buy and download and you can catch Bastille (legally, this time!) at: The Great Escape, Evolution Festival, Sea Sessions, Blissfi elds, Wakestock, T in the Park, Benicassism, The Secret Garden Party, Redfest, Summer Sonic, Reading & Leeds Festival.

Will: Pla

ying

Bass, ob

viously.

Insulted that we want you to read when you have a shiny new smartphone that can go on the internet and stuff? We hear yah. Scan the image in the TV using the layar app, and look what happens.....internet magic! Interactive stuff!!!

Chris “Woody” Woods

23

Words: Joseph SmithStealing SheepInterview

Liverpool is a city which can gladly talk your ear off when it comes to the subject of its own musical significance. However, with a few notable exceptions (here’s looking at you Bunnymen) Merseyside’s post-Beatles exports have usually fit the well-worn stereotype of hairy guitar-wielding scallies playing jangly indie-pop tunes. Leaving that mould well and truly burning in their wake are Stealing Sheep, a three-piece ensemble with a penchant for harmonies who are blurring the lines between folk, psychedelia and synth-pop. We caught up with Becky, Emily and Lucy for coffee and a chat. We were also treated to an exclusive acoustic performance which was all the more impressive when you consider that half the band were dying of colds.

Lucy: “We did a Steve Lamacq session in Maida Vale and we got up at three or four in the morning.”

Becky: “It was a three o’clock starter.”

Lucy: “And we had a twenty hour day.”

Emily: “The day before we’d started getting ill so that was all conducive to it.”

Stealing Sheep rocketed into the public consciousness last year in part thanks to a Hollyoaks advert featuring their single Shut Eye, a tune so devilishly catchy that it’s bound to have been stuck in your head at some point even if you think you’ve never heard it. The band are far from an overnight success however; each member could

be said to be a veteran of the Liverpool music scene in their own right.

Becky: “I think we’ve always, from day one, tried to gig out of the city as much as possible. Not because we want to leave Liverpool but because we want to have our music heard by different people.

“You definitely see different styles of music scene in different places, like in Bristol or Manchester it’s all really different and there are so many different styles of music and things. It gives you a kind of excitement because there’s a lot of competition and stuff that’s going to challenge your music. That’s quite interesting.”

Exclusive AcousticPerformance...

Interactive StuffScan the image with the Layar App, and enjoy an exclusive performance

24

Disclaimer: I love THE EVIL DEAD. All three of the films. And the comics (the best of which is MARVEL ZOMBIES vs ARMY OF DARKNESS). I even have three Evil Dead tattoos because I’m a fucking goth. You might expect someone like me to be furious about this remake, but oddly, I’m not. I sort of was, until I saw the gruesome trailer that had gore in all the right places. Now I’m excited and so should you be. Go in expecting gore, ropey effects and at least one flying eyeball.

IN CINEMAS 19/04/13

The consensus is that OLYMPUS HAS FALLEN is a much better DIE HARD film than any of the recent DIE HARD films. For an action movie full of explosions and beefy men, that’s one hell of a compliment. One of the beefy men is Gerard Butler, of 300, GAMER and, er, THE BOUNTY HUNTER fame. The story is that the White House (the big one in America...not just any white house) has been taken over by terrorists and blah blah Gerard Butler and fighting and explosions! Daring rescues! More explosions! Should be good.

IN CINEMAS 19/04/13

Even though it’s directed by Gus Van Sant and stars Matt Damon (Maaaatt Daaaamooooonnn), both of whom are known for doing great work, I can’t help but think PROMISED LAND looks a bit...bleahh. A bit boring and earnest. It’s about a natural gas salesman and an environmental activist and I can’t for the life of me imagine anything interesting happening. However, if you like poignant, thought-provoking drama (If you’re one of ‘those people’) then you might find something to like.

Choice line from the trailer: “We’re not fighting for land, Steve! We’re fighting for people!”

“Steve.”

IN CINEMAS 19/04/13

EVIL DEAD OLYMPUSHAS FALLEN

PROMISEDLAND

the best bitsat the pictures

this month

On TheBig Scree

nWhether you’re a film fanatic or a casual cinema goer, everyone loves a good movie. Here are our top picks for the month. Don’t hate us if we’re wrong though (read our Die Hard 5 review, sorry again), we’re only trying to help...

Watch the trailers using

Words by CHRIS WELSH

25

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It’s that most wonderful time of the year. Your tent has been in storage for ages, you’ve managed to get the last of the mud off your trainers and you’ve finally got that bonfire smell out of your hoody and BAM just like that – the line ups are announced, and you’re planning it all again. Yeah festivals are dirty, grimy, smelly places to be – but good lord they are a laugh. Where else can you get all your favourite bands together in one place, get drunk in the sunshine and wear a ridiculous outfit*?! Wireless Magazine is bringing you this really rather comprehensive guide to what is happening both here in the UK, and abroad – so read on and get your arse along to one of them!

*This is entirely optional, you will almost certainly look like a bellend in that leopard print onesie and welly combination. But then it is a talking point…*This is entirely optional, you will almost certainly look like a bellend in that leopard print onesie and welly combination. But then it is a talking point…

www.wirelessmag.co.uk/ticke

ts

Don’t forget, if you want to buy tickets for any of the festivals featured in the guide simply scan the QR code next to the preview, or head over to

in association with

You can buy the featured items using the Layar app wherever you see this logo...

27

WORDS: Joseph Smith

THE BIG ONESA quick look at the biggest lineups and the

muddiest fields this year...

What to ExpectIt’s promoted as ‘the best festival’ and with Glastonbury out of the picture in 2012 it inarguably was. Featuring the best line-ups, boutique camping and a hell of a lot of weird things to do, you can’t go wrong with this one.

HighlightsSome of the big names confirmed so far include Elton John, Snoop Dogg, MIA, Franz Ferdinand, The Flaming Lips and Wu Tang Clan. As for DJ sets and emerging talent, we could be here all day listing them to you so check it out online.

When and how Much?5th-8th September. A weekend ticket will set you back £190 and you can save a tenner with a valid NUS card.

What to ExpectThis notoriously muddy pair of weekends usually boasts the best the best rock and indie line-ups. If there’s an interesting guitar band touring this year you can bet that they’ll make a stop here.

HighlightsMusos of a certain age will be falling over themselves to see Deftones and Eminem. Foals, Alt-J and Jake Bugg have the indie bases covered while System of a Down, Biffy Clyro and Fall Out Boy will more than appease hard rock fans.

When and how Much?23rd-25th August. Price £210.50 for a weekend ticket.

What to ExpectDownload serves as a kind of unofficial Mecca for metal-heads and it’s the pick of the crop if you like your music heavy, loud and swathed in leather.

HighlightsThe mighty big three headliners this year comprise of Slipknot, Iron Maiden and Rammstein. One band you’re not going to miss is Queens of the Stoneage who have recently reunited with Dave Grohl for the latest album.

When and how Much?14th-16th June. A five day camping ticket is £205.

£190WEEKEND TICKE

T

Bestival DownloadReading + Leeds

£205FIVE DAYS CAMPING£210

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Don’t forget, if you want to buy tickets for any of the festivals featured in the guide simply scan the QR code next to the preview, or head over to www.wirelessmag.co.uk/tickets .

BUY NOW BUY NOW

28

What to ExpectIn part because of the London Olympics, Glastonbury was notably missing in 2012. As Britain’s most famous musical gathering you can bet that its return this year is going to be something a bit special.

HighlightsIn one of the biggest coups in Glastonbury history, the Rolling Stones have finally confirmed that they will be playing this year’s event. The line-up is bursting with amazing acts but to give you just a few examples, you should see Portishead, Smashing Pumpkins, Arctic Monkeys, Tyler the Creator and Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds.

When and how much?26th-30th June. Tickets have long sold out although there will be a limited resale of cancelled tickets.

What to ExpectEstablished in 2006, Latitude is a relatively young festival but that doesn’t mean it can’t hold its own with the big dogs when it comes to the line-up. It was recently announced that giants of intelligent guitar rock Bloc Party and Foals will both have headline slots alongside a ‘3D show’ from Kraftwerk.

HighlightsTicket shouldn’t miss highly anticipated live returns from Yeah Yeah Yeahs and Hot Chip. The list of unmissables occupying the smaller stages include Alt J, Modest Mouse and Everything Everything.

When and how much?18th-21st July. Weekend standard tickets retail at £183.

What to ExpectNot to be overshadowed by the island’s other big festival, Isle of Wight is a great event for huge names and already established acts. This year it features some great pop acts and classic names, so it’s a great one to bring your family along to.

HighlightsAfter their comeback last year, there are going to be few at the festival who won’t turn up to The Stone Roses’ set. Everybody’s favourite guilty pleasure Bon Jovi are headlining the Sunday; it will be great but you won’t want to admit it.

When and how much?13th-16th June. A weekend camping ticket is £185.

WEEKEND CAMPING£185

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29

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What to ExpectWith no big corporate sponsors and an eco-friendly, family friendly atmosphere, the award winning Green Man festival is just the ticket for getting back to nature and enjoying great music as well as a great camping experience.

HighlightsSeattle rockers Band of Horses are serving as the headliner here, complimented by massive sets from Ben Howard, Midlake and The Horrors.

When and how much?15th-18th August. Weekend camping tickets are £152 or £131 at a student discount.

Green Man

WEEKEND CAMPING£152

What to ExpectProving that festivals aren’t just for hipsters and metal heads, V Festival brings you the best in pop and chart acts. It’s a great one to bring your younger siblings to; there’ll even be something that your little sister’s into!

HighlightsUndisputed queen of R ‘n’ B Beyonce has become something of an unlikely festival veteran in recent years. Kings of Leon are playing and so are Calvin Harris and Liam Gallagher’s Beady Eye.

When and how much?17th & 18th August. Weekend ticket is £185 + booking fee.

What to ExpectNo, sadly we’re not putting on our own festival this year (although that wouldn’t be a bad idea). Our namesakes over at Wireless Fest put on an excellent yearly line-up that, like V Festival, leans towards the chart side of things. This year there’s an excellent turn out of urban artists.

HighlightsOne of the most exciting sets of the season will be Jay Z and Justin Timberlake’s co-headliner on the Sunday. Other massive performances to look out for come from Snoop Dogg, John Legend and Rita Ora.

When and how much?12th-14th July. Weekend tickets are £210.

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31

Boomtown 8th - 12th AugustTaking place on Winchester’s Matterly Estate, Boomtown is a grimy, raggedy mess of reggae, dub and hip hop. The festival has grown in popularity year after year, and blessed by sunny weather, 2012 saw it blossom into a sprawling dystopian mass. Over ten stages, hidden areas, and street parties contribute to a feel of non-stop energy.

Park Life 8th & 9th JuneManchester’s Park Life Weekender was forced to relocate to Heaton Park this year because it’s getting so damn big, and thankfully that expanse has been reflected in the line-up which is one its best to date. Lovers of post punk and moody psychedelia shouldn’t miss The Horrors and Savages. Heading up the Hip Hop side of things are Jurassic 5, Joey Bada$$ and Wretch 32.

Slam Dunk 24th – 29th MayA series of awesome festivals featuring more great alternative talent then you could shake a really long stick at. All Time Low and Deaf Havana a line up that also includes Kids In Glass Houses and Cancer Bats. Four Year Strong are head lining events in Scotland and Ireland so there’s great rock to be had wherever you are.

Pili Pala 17th & 18th MayWelsh for “butterfly”, Pili Pala is also a two day showcase of the best in Welsh art & music set across various venues in Swansea. There’ll be an array of great new bands, workshops and literature events, and it’s all in aid of the charity West Glamorgan Council on Drugs & Alcohol Abuse. Come along & experience the healing power of art while helping out those who are affected by addiction and substance misuse.

Edinburgh Festival Fringe 2nd – 26th AugustFestivals don’t all have to be about mud, rock bands and greebos. This legendary Scottish event is like Mecca for comedians, apart from the Islamic ones to whom Mecca is presumably more Mecca-like. Nevertheless, you can expect jokes of a far higher calibre than the one in the last sentence.

BEST RESTBEST RESTOFTHE

A FEW MORE OF THE COOLEST FESTIVALS AROUND!

32

Field Day 25th MayThis no-nonsense shindig set in London’s Victoria Park only features the best and coolest of the country’s emerging talent. To name but a few great acts playing, there’s Animal Collective, Bat For Lashes, Connan Mockasin, Egyptian Hip Hop, King Krule, Everything Everything, Kurt Vile, SPLASHH and Savages.

Standon Calling 2nd-4th AugustIn this life you don’t get many chances to see De La Soul wearing wellies in the Hertfordshire countryside, so what better reason to come along to Standon Calling? I mean apart from sets by Band of Skulls, Digitalism, Bastille, Toy and The Joy Formidable.

T in the Park 12th-14th JulyScotland’s greatest excuse to get shit-faced in a field turns twenty this year and to celebrate they’ve billed one of the most exciting and eclectic festival line-ups you’re likely to come across this year. For a start they have a headline slot for Rihanna, and then you have sets by Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Foals, Kraftwerk, Alt-J, Tyler the Creator and Jake Bugg. There’s something for everyone!

Beach Break 20th-24th JuneTaking place on the sandy beaches of Cornwall and Newquay, Beach Break is a festival which coincides with the end of the Uni year and is designed to give you students the awesome party you’ve been working so hard for. Look out for performances from Jake Bugg, Devlin and Alunageorge.

Veg Fest 24th-26th May (Bristol)This is Europe’s biggest event for vegetarians, vegans and anybody feeling a twinge of guilt about eating all that horse earlier this year. With 120 food stalls, cookery classes, talks and film screenings, it’s not all about the music, although with the Happy Mondays headlining there are going to be few complaints on that front.



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33

which type of

festival areyou ??

goerLoad up the 4x4, it's festival time, and you've spent hundreds of pounds of your loan

or your parents money on a ticket to a long weekend of music and mud and trying to have

sex in a tent while a drunk Scottish lad pisses up one side of it. Aren't you lucky?

It might be worth reading up on the types of folk you're likely to meet there on the

campsite and the in the main festival area. Most are quite nice and won't put a finger

in your mouth when you yawn. Plus it's important to know which one you are, so you can

seek out others of your kind!

This is possibly most of you. You've never been to a festival before. You've got a tent and a ground sheet and some suntan lotion, but are you ready to unzip your tent at 7am to be met with the sight of a stranger cheerfully masturbating at the entrance? No, you are not. Still, take it all in because your first festival is almost always the best. You meet new people from new places, make friends you'll only see at this festival once a year and marvel at how they can dare charge that much for a tray of chips.

THE WIDE EYED INNOCENT

This unhappy lot were here last year, and it was loads better then. They will do anything they can to achieve the high they felt last time, so beware. “Oh, you remind me of Northern Stu! Northern Stu 2! That's you now!” They live in the past and are doomed to be perpetually disappointed no matter how hard they try.

THE NOSTALGIA CRITIC

The Headcase has OD'd on fun! He isn't wearing a shirt and doesn't know where his friends are, but he couldn't care less. He probably arrived as a Wide Eyed Innocent, but has since crossed over and can now be found moshing enthusiastically to literally any song by any band. He tried to start a circle pit during Mumford & Sons, but it didn't take. He may attach himself to your group, but don't be afraid. He'll run off soon. Just enjoy him while he's there and don't give him your number.

Lying face down and alone, the Sleeping Policeman can be found on a towel somewhere in the main festival area, abandoned by their friends and avoided by everyone else. You might be tempted to check on them, to make sure they're alive, but don't! You touch them, they become your responsibility and suddenly you're sitting in the First Aid tent holding their hair back, all the while missing the band you came here to see.

THE HEADCASE

THE SLEEPING POLICEMAN

??Words: Gazz Wood

34

DOUBLE YOURCHANCES TO

For an even better chance of winning, simply visit our Facebook page, “like” us, and leave a comment with the competition number and your answer, and we’ll put your name in the hat twice! Easy!

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To win return travel for you and a mate, just answer the following question and tell uswhich festival you would like travel for!

Q. Who is headlining the first night at the brilliantly named Wireless Festival this year?

WIN TRAVEL TO TOP UK FESTIVALS WITH BIG GREEN COACH

Set at the easily accessible Cheltenham race course, Wychwood is a family friendly festival offering a good mix of contemporary and your Dad’s favourite bands. Highlights include The Wedding Present, The Beat and Bill Bailey. Also keep an eye out for Kate Nash who has returned to festival form. If you’re 18 years old Kate Nash was the one who was on the radio while everyone still had jobs and your pocket money went up according to the bank of England base rate.

Already booked your festival tickets but no idea how you're going to get there? We've teamed up with Big Green Coach to offer one lucky winner and a mate return travel from pick-up points all over the UK to one of the following festivals; Creamfields, Download, V Festival and Wireless – so all you have to worry about is packing your wellies. Big Green Coach, the Uk’s largest events travel company, offers cheap, easy and ecofriendly travel to most of the biggest festivals and music events. . Find out more at www.biggreencoach.co.uk

WIN TICKETS TO THE LOVELIESTFESTIVAL IN BRITAIN. WYCHWOOD.

To win a pair of tickets, just tell us:True or False: Kate Nash was originally part of the country rock trio

Crosby, Stills and Nash, alongside colleagues Bing and Tesco...

Sun, sea, surfing and probably loads of beautiful people on the pull. What more could you want? Set on the idyllic Newquay coast this is like spring break but with awesome bands and less high fiving Americans. Highlights include Jake Bugg, AlunaGeorge and the hotly tipped story of the festival season Lucy Rose. This year you can get Golden Tickets, which allow you access to exclusive gigs, VIP areas and free transfers around the area while you’re there.

BEACH BREAK - WILLY WONKA STYLE!

To win a pair of Golden Tickets, just tell us:True or False: Jake Bugg was actually discovered on the set of I’m A

Celebrity after he was almost ingested by Kerry Katona.

3 WORDS: CROATIAN. BEACH. PARTY. Soundwave Festival is one of the biggest and best festivals to come out of Europe in years. With a tasty mixture of dance, dub and reggae including DJ Shadow, you’re bound to have an awesome time. Enjoy!

To win a pair of tickets, just tell us: True or False: Croatia is ananagram of Taco Air, which is also a lovely way of describing the

gaseous release made after a large Mexican meal.

3rd June

35

Motel Black Leather Shorts £30.00www.resurrection-online.com

Leopard Print Tee£16www.stokedclothing.co.uk

CUN† Ring $39.99www.iheardtheyeatcigarettes.com

Blue and White Shirt £18www.deepvintageclothing.co.uk

Royal Stuart Bow Tie £22www.mrsbowtie.com

Snapback £14.99 www.breezeclothinglondon.com

Denim Dungarees£30www.resurrection-online.com

Grey & Black Stripe Tee £12www.resurrection-online.com

GETTHELOOK

Festival season is almost upon us, you’ve paid for the tickets; know how you’re getting there & you’ve got the tent. Now would be a good time to think about what to take...

Wireless has teamed up with the UK’s newest, freshest & brightest independent apparel brands to bring you the best threads to see you through any festival. All pieces are easy to pack, interchangeable and

most are unisex (guys, I would advise staying away from the leather hot pants).For the guys, keep it light with 2 pairs of shorts & a few tee’s. Girls, a pair of dungarees is a good way to work a few looks.

FROM LEFT TO RIGHT:Vanderlism Stag Tee £17www.paradiceclothing.bigcartel.com

Urban Print Sweat £25www.realclothinguk.bigcartel.com

Alpha Beanie £10www.drpopcorn.com

College Print Racer Back Vest(under vintage shirt) £16www.deepvintageclothing.co.uk

Earl Tee £25www.drpopcorn.com

Zealot Tee £15www.trustnooneclothing.bigcartel.com

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FROM LEFT TO RIGHT:Vanderlism Stag Tee £17www.paradiceclothing.bigcartel.com

Urban Print Sweat £25www.realclothinguk.bigcartel.com

Alpha Beanie £10www.drpopcorn.com

College Print Racer Back Vest(under vintage shirt) £16www.deepvintageclothing.co.uk

Earl Tee £25www.drpopcorn.com

Zealot Tee £15www.trustnooneclothing.bigcartel.com

37

FROM LEFT TO RIGHT:

Lava Effect Tee£12.99www.faded-apparel.co.uk

Necklaces(model’s own)

iPad/MacBook Bag as Clutch£45www.smugbags.com

College Drop Out Tee£9.99www.blurbclothing.co.uk

Denim Gilet£35Topman Vintage

Aviator Rucksack£50 (use “wireless10” for exclusive discount)

www.mygreenbag.co.uk

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Dorian Grey Tee £29.90www.the-affair.com

Breeze Traditional Tee(behind)£14.99www.breezeclothinglondon.com

Myself Movement Music Tee£9.99www.blurbclothing.co.uk

Raglan Sleeve Denim Dress (behind)£22www.deepvintageclothing.co.uk

Printed Cotton ScoopNeck Fitted Tee £14.99www.marketplace.asos.com/boutique/runfell/

Styles & Words: Steve JordanAssistant: Clare BarryPhotography:Matt @ Manic PhotographyModels: Majestic Models

39

Wireless Magazine does not in any way advocate the sneaking in of alcohol to a festival. We particularly do not endorse the idea of

carrying up to 750ml (about a bottle of wine) strapped to your body like some sort of boozy self destruction device with a handy spout. Do not buy this whatever you do.

Festival EssentialsLive like a king, festival style...

So at first you might be thinking, £179 for a tent? Have you gone bonkers Wireless? Well no, we haven't. See this is tent is a very worthwhile investment for those of you who might be travelling to a festival en-masse. It takes about 60 seconds to put up, and comfortably sleeps 4 people and their stuff – therefore eliminating the need to trek around finding a space big enough for 4 tents! It's just common sense really. Plus

it hardly weighs anything, and unlike your average pop up tent, it's actually possible to take it down

again without bursting into tears and calling your Dad. Awesome.

Coleman 4 Man Touring Tent £179 - Halfords

So it's 4 in the morning, you've finally got to sleep and then ding dong, nature calls. That last beer was a bad idea. But you're cosy in your tent, it's cold outside and there are drunken zombies waiting to talk to you. Sod that. This is actually a brilliant, albeit

slightly gross sounding invention which basically

means you can relieve yourself into a bag, without any mess, and it'll turn to gel and seal itself shut. Then just throw it away the next morning. Job done.

Travel John Portable Urinal 3 for £10 - www.onestopfestival.com

Go Travel Folding Festival Kart Trolley £11.99 - Halfords

There are two importnat facts about going to a festival that you will learn quickly. One, is that it is perfectly sociably acceptable to drink a beer before 9am if you still haven’t been to bed yet. The other is that everything, including the aforementioned beer, weighs an absolute ton when you’ve been walking for (what feels like) miles with it strapped to your back. This lightweight trolley will be the best thing you could possibly take with you, with the exception of a tent anyway...

Vango Self Inflating Travel Mat£18 - completeoutdoors.co.uk

Compact Chair with drink holder£16.99 each or 2 for £20 - completeoutdoors.co.uk

The only thing worse than walking for ages with a massive bag and a crate of lager, is if you finally get to where

you’ll be sleeping for the next few nights and it turns out that the ground is essentially made of thistles, rocks and what feels like a

collection of hammers. Avoid waking up feeling like you’ve been kidney punched by a giant with this stroke of genius underneath you. Plus it’s self inflating. Which is nice.

Sitting down. Potentially the world’s most underrated activity behind breathing and discretely scratching. We almost all spend our say sat on our arses either in a lecture or playing FIFA, so when you have this divine right taken and replaced with squatting on some damp grass, you really do notice it. And this chair comes with a cup holder! Can I get a hallelujah? No? How about a beer...?

WIN EVERYTHING IN THIS SECTION PLUS LOADS MORE (INCLUDINGA PAIR OF LEEDS/READING TICKETS!) CHECK THE ULTIMATE

FESTIVAL KIT COMPETITION ON P48.

This is a much needed device for anyone who prefers the idea of not waiting for 2 hours in a massive queue in the sun, just to get a few hours of battery life on your phone. This is a compact, incredibly handy charger and will happily rejuvenate any iPhone/smartphone twice before it runs out.

Black Rock 2200 Juice Pack £14.99 - www.onestopfestival.com

Kitsound Mini Buddy SpeakerBee / Football

£9.99 - Halfords

Booze Belly£8.50 - www.red-freddies.co.uk

These cute lil fellas are small enough to fit on your keyring, but they produce a surprising amount of volume - making them an ideal accompaniment to any festival. Just attach the jack into an MP3 player/phone and you can annoy your tent dwelling neighbours all day and night. You can even join two together for extra volume, so every reveller will hear and enjoy your awesome playlist for miles (metres) around.


40

Wireless Magazine does not in any way advocate the sneaking in of alcohol to a festival. We particularly do not endorse the idea of

carrying up to 750ml (about a bottle of wine) strapped to your body like some sort of boozy self destruction device with a handy spout. Do not buy this whatever you do.

So it's 4 in the morning, you've finally got to sleep and then ding dong, nature calls. That last beer was a bad idea. But you're cosy in your tent, it's cold outside and there are drunken zombies waiting to talk to you. Sod that. This is actually a brilliant, albeit

slightly gross sounding invention which basically

means you can relieve yourself into a bag, without any mess, and it'll turn to gel and seal itself shut. Then just throw it away the next morning. Job done.

Travel John Portable Urinal 3 for £10 - www.onestopfestival.com

This is a much needed device for anyone who prefers the idea of not waiting for 2 hours in a massive queue in the sun, just to get a few hours of battery life on your phone. This is a compact, incredibly handy charger and will happily rejuvenate any iPhone/smartphone twice before it runs out.

Black Rock 2200 Juice Pack £14.99 - www.onestopfestival.com

Kitsound Mini Buddy SpeakerBee / Football

£9.99 - Halfords

Booze Belly£8.50 - www.red-freddies.co.uk

These cute lil fellas are small enough to fit on your keyring, but they produce a surprising amount of volume - making them an ideal accompaniment to any festival. Just attach the jack into an MP3 player/phone and you can annoy your tent dwelling neighbours all day and night. You can even join two together for extra volume, so every reveller will hear and enjoy your awesome playlist for miles (metres) around.

CUSTOMSHOP

VISITwww.marshallcustomshop.com

NOW!

Marshall Amplifi cation plc Denbigh Road, Bletchley, Milton Keynes MK1 1DQWebsite: www.marshallamps.com

41

Kier Kemp, Fearless Vampire Killers: Probably when me and Laurence were 17, mashed on local cider at Latitude Fest! We stumbled into the main arena and shed a few tears over Damien Rice... beautiful moment.’

Gaz Coombes: I’m playing at Hop Farm which I’m really excited about and last time I played there I met Neil Young. That was obviously massive for me! I was really star struck!

Hadouken: Being in a band we have the opportunity to catch a lot of other bands that we love. We were lucky enough to be side of stage for bands like Foo Fighters, The Prodigy, and Arctic Monkeys which is great. As a band when we play to huge crowds it’s wicked, we played to 20,000 people in Japan which was a great buzz.

Stealing Sheep: Pohoda Festival, Slovakia 2012

Becky: Slovakia was really cool. When we went there it was really sunny and we went swimming in lakes. We went to a castle.Emily: We saw a massive storm as well with forks of lightning coming down.Lucy: We had to go in a sort of staff room and be kept away from the storm, because we could sue them for letting us out into the outside. Elbow nearly got cancelled. We got to see Bat For Lashes and Warpaint as well.

Splashh: Rhythm and Vines Festival, NYE 2010, Gisborne NZ. Jacob and Sasha’s Justice Trip.

Flying Lotus was on soon so we made our way through the crowd to the stage and caught the end of Gaslamp Killer. I had no clue what to expect from Flying Lotus but as he started dishing the beats we started receiving them, in a big way. Out of nowhere a bass player and a drummer emerge either side and these dudes start LAYING the shit down. For real! The whole thing became this aural robot organism orgasm and Sasha and I completely lost our shit...

A MASS DEBATE SPECIAL What is your mostmemorable festival experience?


42

Pete Reilly & Kyle Falconer, The View:Pete: Oasis at T in The Park 2002 - we were still at school and Kyle and I were right at the front for Oasis and we both ended up on the highlights on TV! Kyle: The same as Pete and seeing Mo’s Mum on his Dad’s shoulders watching us at T in the Park

Sea Sick Steve: We played the anniversary of Glastonbury a couple of years ago and I think there were something like eighty thousand people out there. I’d played there before and I’m playing there this year, but that time, to see so many people screaming, it humbled me right down to my boots.

Nathan, Sound Of Guns: For me it was Leeds, my second ever festival back in 2004. That night I took mushrooms for the first time (they were still legal). I had to return to my tent where I started to turn into my nan. I was talking to myself as if I was her and answering myself. After me and my nan had a chat, Jimi Hendrix visited me in the form of my rucksack.

Kate Nash: It has to be when I broke into a theme park after a show somewhere in Europe. We played in a spiegal tent and I was pretty mad about something so I got super drunk and me and my guitarist Jay decided we were going to the nearby theme park. I definitely wouldn’t recommend doing it as it was stupid and dangerous, but that’s my most memorable festival experience for sure.

“Kate Nash performs at Boutique and Family Festival, Wychwood, 31st May - 2nd June at Cheltenham Race Course alongside Bill Bailey, The Human League, Lucy Rose and much more. Info and tickets available from wychwoodfestival.com. Kate’s third album ‘Girl Talk’ is out now.”

Charlie Fink, Noah And The Whale: We played Latitude three or four years ago and that was a really beautiful show. It was ‘The First Days of Spring’ album campaign and that was a really tough record and took a while for people to come around to it. But that was the show that I felt the audience was really there to hear the record. Oh yeah and seeing Neil at Glastonbury two years ago was amazing.

43

Festival EssentialsKeep on looking awesome, you sexy thing.

Deluxe Festival Poncho£14.99 - onestopfestivalshop.com

We all know that feeling when you’ve spent ages trying not to look as if you’ve been partying since 9am the day before. You’ve finally got that dry shampoo on the go, you’ve finally got a pleasant aroma going and you have at long last managed to wipe the ketchup off your face from last night’s burger. You feel awesome. Then all of a sudden, mother nature hitches up her skirt and decides its time for a shower too. Yep, you look like a drowned rat once again. Should’ve bought a poncho...

FunzeeFrom £20.95 - funzee.co.uk

Are you on the pull? Buy a Funzee. Are you looking to pitch a tent? Buy a Funzee. Have you dropped your phone somewhere in the crowd? Doesn’t matter, buy a Funzee. See, they truly are the most versatile item of clothing you’ll own - because you’ll look both ridiculous and brilliant regardless of the situation.

Use our code

Funzee4Less and

get

a 10% discount!

Berocca£14.99 - funzee.co.uk

To keep things simple, Berocca is like all the vitamins and minerals you’ll ever need, in one handy dispersible tablet. You’ll feel, and probably look, much better! Plus it comes with a surprise that we won’t tell you now.

Nivea Pocket Range

Don’t let your lovely skin dry out in the sun and let you turn into a walking cornflake. Nivea have a great range of pocket sized products from high factor suncream, sun protection lipbalm and cleansing wipes. Make sure you invest in some sun protection, nothing is worse than spending your weekend in pain while your mates all have fun...

Festival Survival Pack

The geniuses over at One Stop Festival have come up with this handy bag of treats that will help you survive even the grubbiest of fields! With everything from an eye mask to hand sanitizer to waterless body wash, you would be silly not to invest in one of these packs! They come in

various sizes from basic to super deluxe, depending on how gross you intend to get. Love you really.

£15.99 - onestopfestival.com

Batiste Dry Shampoo£3 - Boots/Superdrug etc

Have you ever had a shower at a festival? Well we’ve done it, and trust us when we say that even the most delightfully clean people you know, suddenly lose any ability to use a shower (or toilet) the minute they get to a festival. Instead of wading through bodily excretions and cans, just use this stuff and your hair will look as good as always.

BUY ME

BUY ME

BUY ME

From £3 - Boots/Superdrug etc


44

www.greenstewards.com

Come and enjoy festivals!

Sign up now to secure your festival tickets!

GlastonburySecret Garden Party

ShambalaBeautiful Days

Bearded theory

Galtres Sunrise: Another WorldNotting HillSt Pauls Carnivalplus more...

We have places at:

No it is not a joke and no it is not a scam. There IS a way to get to your favourite festivals for free (well most of them anyway).

Almost all festivals use volunteers in some way. Anything from litter picking to being a Production Runner, those jobs are out there. Normally if you search around on a festival website, you will find a list of opportunities to work in return for a ticket.

You would normally be expected to work a set number of hours in return for a free ticket, crew wristband and some free food. If you have ever bought food at a festival you will understand how attractive free food is!

There are several roles that are normally filled with volunteers. The biggest group on site is normally volunteer stewards and bar staff, followed by the litter crew. Litter crew is not everyone’s cup of tea, but the advantage is that most of the work will happen after the event so you are free to party for most of the festival. Stewarding obviously happens during the event but if you are smart, you will arrive early and get the pick of the shifts...

Almost every volunteer position requires a deposit. It is normally at least the value of the normal adult ticket. As long as you do your shifts, this will be returned to you after the event, how long depends on the organisation you volunteered with.

So what are you waiting for? Summer of free festivals? Piece of cake.

FREE Festival Tickets Anyone?FREE Festival Tickets Anyone?

VENUE: YOU CHOOSE

PRICE: FREE

FOOD: FREE

ACCESS: ALL AREAS

45

Primavera Sound Spain,

22nd – 26th May

Another Spanish

festival in ano

ther

devastatingly s

unny location, t

his

time on a beac

h. Benicassim

is

renowned for att

racting the bes

t

line-ups in Eur

ope and this yea

r

it features a

great mix of n

ew

and classic acts

. You have Queen

s of

the Stone Age, P

rimal Scream, Di

zzee

Rascal, Palma Vi

olets, Splashh,

Swim

Deep, Temples an

d Arctic Monkeys

.

Benicassim Spa

in,

18th – 21st Jul

y

Everybody’s favourite pan-European specialist metal festival is taking place across four countries this year so here are the details: the French leg will take place on 8th & 9th June, the show will hit Italy on 8th June and Spain on 31st May and 1st June. All of the shows will feature Iron Maiden and Megadeth but you’ll have to check the listings of each event to make sure you see the bands you came for.

Sonisphere

Bask in the Portugue

se sunshine to

the soothing sound

s of headliners

Green Day, Depeche Mode and

Kings of Leon. Or if that

doesn’t tickle your

fancy you

can check out Phoe

nix, Alt-J,

Jake Bugg, Japandriods, Crystal

Castles, Jurassic 5

or Death From

Above 1979. There’s

something for

everyone!

Optimus Alive Port

ugal,

12th – 14th July Outlook

Croatia,

29th August – 2n

d September

Bored of the UK? Fancy a break from the weather? Or a pint for slightly less than the price of a reasonably sized bungalow? You might want to check out some of the awesome festivals happening abroad. Just don’t get drunk and lose your passport...

INTERNATIONAL

FESTIVALGUIDE

Why risk getting trench foot

back in blighty when you can

enjoy some of the world’s best

bands with guaranteed good

weather. A few choice acts

playing this year are Animal

Collective, Nick Cave and the

Bad Seeds, Wu-Tang Clan, Tame

Impala, Blur and The Jesus and

Mary Chain.

What better way

to round off th

e

festival seaso

n than attendin

g

Europe’s large

st Bass music

festival?

Celebrating

the best underground club

music the worl

d has to offer,

Outlook Festiv

al will have yo

ur

ears ringing u

ntil next summ

er.

46

If you fancy a change of scene from the stereotypical English festival than you can’t do much better than a dance,

electronic and urban gathering in the middle of Croatia. Doom is

playing as well as DJ Shadow, DJ Yoda and Ghostpoet.

Soundwave Croatia,18th – 22nd July

Poland has go

t a lot going

for it apart

from cheap booze.

Best buddies Alex

Turner and Josh Homme

are set to

share a stag

e in a billi

ng that

includes, Queens

of the Stone

Age, Arctic

Monkeys, Animal

Collective,

Nick Cave,

Blur,

Alt-J, Tame I

mpala, Modest

Mouse and

Skunk Anansie

. What’s not to l

ove?

Open’er Pola

nd,

3rd – 6th Jul

y

If you fancy going Dutch this festival

season then Pink Pop offers a great

eclectic mix of pop and hard

rock acts. Confirmed so far

are Ben Howard, Die Antwoord,

Fun., Green Day, Jimmy Eat World,

Queens of the Stone Age, Lianne La

Havas, Paramore and Phoenix.

Pink Pop Netherlands, 14th – 16th June

Nobody knows how to rock like the Germans and this legendary event at Nurburgring Racetrack has played host to some of the best contemporary rock acts in living memory. The line up this year includes The Prodigy, Korn and Limp Bizkit.

Rock Am Ring Germany, 7th – 9th June

Belgium

can be

a pretty

weird

place; t

hey noto

riously

drown

their ch

ips in m

ayonnais

e and

now they

’re thro

wing Neil

Young an

d Eminem

on the

same

stage al

ongside

Nine Inc

h Nails

and The

Prodigy.

It’s so

crazy i

t

just mig

ht work.

Pukkelpo

p Belgiu

m,

15th – 1

7th Augu

st

We’ve teamed up with Planet Festival – the festival travel experts – to offer one

lucky winner and a mate free travel from pick-up points around the UK to one of the following European festivals; Outlook (Croatia), Dimensions (Croatia), Tomorrowland (Belgium) or M’era Luna (Germany).

The one-stop shop where you can buy your return travel, transfer, festival tickets and accommodation in one go, Planet Festival is the perfect solution for anyone wanting some European festival fun. Worried about stretching that student loan? Planet Festival’s packages are not only easy to organise, but very easy on the budget. For more information, see www.planetfestival.co.uk

To win return travel for you and a mate, just answer the following question and tell us which festival you would like travel for!Q. In which country do Outlook and Dimensions Festival take place?

T&Cs Closing date is 31 May 2013This competition is open to UK residents aged 18 and over. One winner will be selected. Their nominated guest must be over 18. The prize includes and is limited to; Travel for two people to either Outlook, Dimensions, Tomorrowland or M’era Luna from selected pick-up point. Pick-up points are:Outlook / Dimensions – Manchester, Birmingham, Dover, Lakeside Shopping Centre (Essex), LondonTomorrowland – Manchester, Birmingham, London, Dover, Newcastle, Leeds, Sheffi eld, Nottingham Mera Luna – Birmingham, London, Dover, Manchester There are no other pick-up point options Prize does not include: Any expense or costs incurred by winner during the trip / festival. Cost for travelling to/from selected pick up point. It is the responsibility of the winner and their nominated guest to ensure they have, at time of travel; A valid passport. Correct travel insurance. Winner and guest are responsible for getting themselves to pick up point for scheduled time, otherwise prize is void. Prize is non-transferable and no cash alternative is available. All elements of prize are subject to change

WIN TRAVEL TO TOP EUROPEAN FESTIVALS WITH PLANET FESTIVAL!


47

Yes, yes indeed. We’ve teamed up with some lovely companies to bring you this absolute belter of a prize. Not one, but two huge giveaways worth over £700 each! We all know that going to a festival can be a bit of a nightmare to organise, so we’re going to take some of the headache away for you - by providing you with all the camping gear and festival essentials you’ll need, as well as a pair of tickets for either Leeds or Reading festival! We’ve put together one kit aimed at girls, and one aimed at lads - so either way, it’s a cracking prize...

The Lads Kit includes:Coleman 4 man tent (worth £259) • North Face rucksack • Topman vouchers • Bottle of Fireball Whisky • Crate of Rekorderlig Cider • £50 Vesty food vouchers • Vango Self Inflating Mat • Onestopfestival pack • Speakers • Festival Trolley • Sleeping Bag • Chair • Nivea Suncream • Portable Urinal • T Shirts • Deluxe Poncho • Funzee • Berocca • Shitbox • A Camera• Some bog roll • Loads more too!

The Girls Kit includes:As above, but also with Batiste Dry Shampoo • Topshop vouchers • Nivea Skincare & Lip Balm • T Shirt (as featured in the festival fashion section) • Some other random bits...

AND WE’LL EVEN CHUCK IN 50 QUID SPENDING MONEY EACH TOO.

PLUS A PAIR OF TICKETS TO EITHERREADING OR LEEDS FESTIVAL!

Three runners up will also get a b o t t l e o f Fireball whisky, a tasty crate of R e k o r d e r l i g cider and a few other goodies too. Good lord we’re good to you aren’t we??

How to enter:To enter, simply log on to facebook.com/wirelessmagazineand tell us what you’d call your Ultimate Festival, and who would be the headliner! If you haven’t got Facebook, you can also text plus your answer to but COMPS FEST 07786 202 430 don’t forget to tell us your name/location.

For decades it’s been the biggest event in the rock calendar, with legendary performances from the likes of Nirvana, The Chilis and Beastie Boys having gone down in history, amongst many many others. Yes, Reading and Leeds are back this year with one of the strongest line ups to date! Featuring the likes of Biffy Clyro, Green Day, Eminem, Nine Inch Nails, Fall Out Boy, Frank Turner, Foals, Skrillex, Jake Bugg, Alt J and loads more across three absolutely epic days to remember - this is one year you certainly don’t want to miss. There are still a whole heap more acts to be announced for this, including the comedy stage where previously unknown acts like a certain Michael McIntyre made his debut a few years a g o .

Along with the festival kits above, the organisers have given us a pair of tickets for each of the winners, at the site of your choice!

WIN THE ULTIMATEFESTIVAL KIT!

48

Gwyl Pili Pala Festival Friday 17 & Saturday 18 May

Swansea 2 days • 7 venues • 50 + bands and writers

MUSIC

••• Masters in France••• • Cut Ribbons • Denuo • Peasant’s King •

• The Gentle Good • The People The Poet • • Violas • We’re No Heroes •

+ See Monkey Do Monkey Stage featuring • The Keys • Fist of the First Man • Houdini Dax •

+ MORE

LITERATURE •••Revelator Orchestra•••

• Alan Kellerman • Annie Bell-Davies • Horatio Clare • • Rachel Trezise • Rebbecca Ray • Tyler Keevil •

TICKETS

All Venues Pass: £15-£20 • 14+/Dry Venues Only: £10-£15 www.WeGotTickets.com • www.SeeTickets.com

In support of the West Glamorgan Council

On Alcohol and Drug Abuse

www.PiliPala.org Facebook.com/PiliPalaFest

Twitter @PiliPalaFest

49

Movie pitch: It’s 2013 in a country known only as ‘Broken Britain’ and everybody’s feeling the squeeze. A triple dip recession has destroyed social welfare, tuition subsidies and perhaps most devastatingly of all, guitar music.

The unwavering costs of rehearsal rooms and drum kits have seen a surge in the popularity of Ed Sheeran and a scourge of privately-funded nu-folk bands from the Home Counties.

Indeed, rock ‘n’ roll would be all but lost if it wasn’t for

a duo of Californians jetting in to save the day in a scene reminiscent of some bloody Hollywood war flick.

“It’s all lies in the music industry. Everything’s a lie. There are lies on the radio, live shows are a lie. Like people think the Black Keys are a two piece but if you listen to their production, it sounds great but it’s not a two piece. And when you see them live it’s not a two piece. Yet still people believe this weird lie

that they’re a two piece. It’s like cheating to us. It’s like taking steroids.”

Lindsey and Julie of Deap Vally don’t

seem to take much seriously but get them

talking about the music industry and all their vitriol comes bubbling to the surface.

We caught up with the pair as they were eating houmous backstage ahead of their first Liverpool gig (“We like to think of ourselves as the female Beatles so we love it here”). Their dry-wit double-

DEAP VALLYDEAP VALLYA Backstage Chat With

Words: Joseph Smith

“It’s all lies in the music

industry. Everything’s a lie.”

“It’s all lies in the music

industry. Everything’s a lie.”

50

act hardly lets up and if they weren’t a band they’d surely be stars of their own sit-com.

“We’re constantly fighting for what we want to do, but when you’re dealing with British people it’s never really fighting, you just get some passive aggressive emails back and forth,” the band’s drummer Julie added a knowing smile before getting carried away with herself, “then we get aggressive so people call us stroppy.”

In a musical landscape dominated by electro and folk Deap Vally are hard-rock dinosaurs. Their music is rich in loud stomping Zeppelin-esque blues riffs and Lindsey’s screaming vocals are in stark contrast to the twee whispering singer song-writer vocals that are so prevalent in today’s scene.

Julie: “I think what we’re doing now is sixties and seventies meets nineties, which I regard as the golden-eras of rock. We’re finally at a point where we can look back and put the three together.”

Lindsey: “In a lot of ways we’re a vintage band and we’re drawing on the most athletic aspects of rock. Some instruments don’t figure into it because they don’t ask anything of you physically. Like when you watch Zeppelin on stage they’re all busting their asses.”

Being both a two piece and a girl band, Deap Vally are battling on two fronts when it comes to lazy comparisons by half-arsed music blogs. The truth is that despite only having two members the group’s

sound is far from minimal.

Lindsey: “I don’t get it with some bands. There might be five of them and you can’t figure out why. It doesn’t add up. You can’t tell what noise is coming from where. What’s the point of it? Why are there five of you on stage? I mean, what jobs are they all doing? It’s like the welfare state.

“We’ve never just been a garage band at all. I think ‘Gonna Make My Own Money’ is very garagey but ‘End of the World’ isn’t garagey at all. So we’re garagey less often than not. We’re like heavy classic rock.”

Despite the obvious onstage limitations of having very few members, the Vally girls have fiercely refused to take advantage of some technological shortcuts. Julie makes sure to lean into the Dictaphone when making this point:

“One thing we will never do, never, ever, EVER... is to play to tracks. That’s so lame.

“All this new technology in music - when the Killers came around it became the hipster thing to have electronic things in your music, and the backlash to that was the

acoustic movement. And I think maybe we’re the backlash to that.

“I think about it a lot and I had a really deep thought when I was high the other night. I think modern rock was ruined by emo and screamo.

It made rock this really weird niche thing and

totally wiped it out of the mainstream.”

So how does the band account for the re-emergence of bland folk bands?

Lindsey: “Everything goes in waves I guess.”

Julie: “It’s all the soy in their diet.”

Lindsey: “Maybe there are just a lot of complacent people. I feel like we’ve got something to say, that’s a big part of it. We’re really passionate about what we do and how we do it. Maybe people aren’t saying stuff that they believe and maybe that’s why they whisper it.”

“One thing we will never do,

never, ever, EVER... is to play

to tracks. That’s so lame.

“One thing we will never do,

never, ever, EVER... is to play

to tracks. That’s so lame.

51

Cheap Night In!Cheap Night In!

Hors D’oeuvres is actually French for ‘horse on a cocktail stick’ but these days you can get away with stabbing a splinter through anything and calling it an appetizer. The weirder the better! Popular ingredients that you can pass as Heston Blumenthal recipes include marshmallows, pickled onions, chocolate sauce, liquid nitrogen and bacon. Have a woodlouse infestation? Why not skewer up a few of the buggers and serve them to the early arrivals? It’s a delicacy in Turkmenistan don’t-cha-know?

The Wireless guide to having a cracking party on a shoestring budget ...

Crazy Glasses

Everybody knows that the difference

between a socialite and an alcoholic is that

the former only drinks from a suitably wacky glass. Hopefully you might have a few of these lying around from those shitty drinks gift sets you get for Christmas but otherwise you might be able to pick something up in your local Poundland. Failing that you can always get creative. Any ridiculous receptacle will do as long as the name of the drink justifies it. For example, the ‘Jammy Dodger’ could be served in a jam jar, ‘Sex on the Beach’ in a hollowed out pineapple, and the ‘Dog’s Asshole’ in a man’s shoe.

Hors D’oeuvres

TWEET US YOUR

COCKTAIL IDEAS

@WIRELESSUK

52

Ok so here’s the important pa

rt - the cocktails. Below we’ve given you

a couple of classic

recipes using Funkin cockt

ail mixers, which are a gr

eat way of getting tasty drinks

without

having to splash out in a cl

ub. Oh and one last thing, s

tock up on as much ice as yo

u can get your

hands on because you’re goin

g to need it –

It’s a well-known fact that rich people

only listen

to classical music, which is funn

y because it’s the

one genre that Poundland is more than adequately

stocked with. You’ll probably get

away with buying

one CD and throwing it on repeat because all

classical music sounds the same and is woefully

light on drum solos. One

artist notable enough t

o

have a Wikipedia page is a dude c

alled Mozart who

apparently started his c

areer at the age of five,

which kind of makes him th

e Justin Bieber of the

18th century.

Music

The best way of doing James Bond

on a budget is to go for a cheap

polyester suit from Primark

which you can get for around

£20 these days. Some of them

even come with bow-ties but if

you’re missing that accessory

you can always go for the

catch-all Art Attack method of

cutting one out of a cereal box

and covering it in poster paint.

Girls can make tasteful low cut dresses by

wearing normal ones backwards or going at

them with a pair of scissors. Any off-cuts

can be used to make matching outfits for your

pets. Trust us, it will be ultra-classy.

Suitable Attire

Are you going

to tell him it’s

black tie only?

Mojito –Ingredients:

1 Part White Rum, 1 Part Funkin PureP

our Lime,

¼ Part Funkin Sugar Syrup,

Mint Leaves or Funkin Pure

e of

your choice (optional). Pur

ists will want to crush up some

mint leaves, brown sugar and l

ime juice with ice before

pouring in the rum, but with the Funkin

mixers you can just

pour everything over some

ice and serve. To mix it u

p a

little you can leave out the

mint and choose from a rang

e of

purees. Raspberry or Straw

berry Mojito anyone?

Peach Bellini –

Ingredients: 2 Parts sparkl

ing wine, ½ Part Funkin Peach Pur

ee.

So you get a glass and put t

he ingredients in. What? Nobody sa

id it was going to be complicated.

Wolfgang Bieber

And remember please drink responsibly!

Cocktail Recipes

53

HIGHLIGHTS &LOW POINTS

WORDS: Joseph Smith

APRIL/MAY

WalesThe Fall

22nd May @ The Globe, Cardiff The Vaccines 6th May @ Venue Cymru, Llandu

dno

John Power31st May @ Central Station

Wrexham

DJ Yoda27th April @ The Globe, Cardiff

Wolf Alice1st June @ Buffalo Bar, Cardiff

Mick Hucknall21st April @ Saint David’s Hall, Cardiff

Meat Loaf21st April @ Cardiff Motor Point Ar

ena

Leona Lewis12th May @ Cardiff Motorpoint Arena

Suggs11th May @ Grand Theatre

Swansea

Chas & Dave15th May @ Grande Theatre

Swansea

Old time cockney sing-a-longs aren’t your usual student night out, or

maybe they are. Maybe your’re working part time as a chimney sweep. What the hell do I know?

This is Suggs’ ‘Life Story’ tour which is presumably a spoken word gig where he quietly skips over working as a roadie for nazi band Skrewdriver and gets right to the part where he played at the Olympics.

Leona Lewis’ biggest hit ‘Bleeding In Love’ was in fact written by former boy band member Jesse McCartney but her rendition did wonders for raising awareness of the condition of male periods.

Love him or hate him, you’ve

got to admit; Meat Loaf is

pretty damn impressive.

I mean how can someone so

monstrously fat ingest so

much cocaine for such a long period of

time without their heart letting out?

Well this is the ‘Last Bat’ tour so we

won’t speak to soon.

Mick Hucknall is to soul music what Jive Bunny is to dance. Here are some further reasons to hate Mick courtesy of his wikipedia page: He is a Manchester United Fan. He once described himself as a sex addict. He owns a restaurant with Johnny Depp. Makes you sick doesn’t it?

Wolf Alice seems to

straddle a metaphorical

line between folk, grunge

and electro that before we

didn’t quite know

existed, but by

jove it’s good.

More of this

please.

The ‘cartoony’ copy and

paste stylings of this

highly acclaimed hip hop

producer have b e e n

a regular staple

of Radio 1. The

makings of a

decent night out.

The legendary song writing force who played in The La’s

and Cast. There are rumours he’ll play John Lennon in a forthcoming musical and we can’t think of anyone better for the job.

The boys from the Vaccines

round off their UK tour this

year with a quick stop in

Llandudno before setting off to

South America. Their latest record saw

a marked maturing of their sound and

included more than a few great tunes.

Definitely not one you’re going to

want miss.

The chaotic post-punk legends are truly on top form with music’s most disagreeable front man Mark E. Smith stil delivering characteristically unpredictable and self-sabotaging live performances. They even sacked a guitarist the other week. Long live The Fall.

It’s EASY!!!Got an iPhone? Then just

scan the QR code: or search for

“Wireless Magazine”on the app store or

Google play

NOW TRY THE APP!!!NOW TRY THE APP!!!

WEEKLY EDITION

That’s right folks, from the 8th March we are introducing a weekly app-only edition to keep you up to date with the latest goings on - check it out!

We understand this is a traumatic time for you. You've reached the end of this month’s fantastic magazine and are now faced with the prospect of waiting a whole month (or longer) for your fill of Wireless goodness. WRONG SUCKA! Because, after what amounts to literally hours of development, our head boffin Rob has cobbled together some leftover code and some great articles we couldn’t cram into the printed mag, to create: Wireless Magazine Weekly Edition.

We'll drip feed this to you, through your smartphone, every Friday (if we remember) to prevent you slipping into a Wireless withdrawal coma.

And it's totally FREE! Ain’t we nice? Not got a smartphone?-- You're so yesterday!!

FREEThe content, not the phone!

54

It’s EASY!!!Got an iPhone? Then just

scan the QR code: or search for

“Wireless Magazine”on the app store or

Google play

NOW TRY THE APP!!!NOW TRY THE APP!!!

WEEKLY EDITION

That’s right folks, from the 8th March we are introducing a weekly app-only edition to keep you up to date with the latest goings on - check it out!

We understand this is a traumatic time for you. You've reached the end of this month’s fantastic magazine and are now faced with the prospect of waiting a whole month (or longer) for your fill of Wireless goodness. WRONG SUCKA! Because, after what amounts to literally hours of development, our head boffin Rob has cobbled together some leftover code and some great articles we couldn’t cram into the printed mag, to create: Wireless Magazine Weekly Edition.

We'll drip feed this to you, through your smartphone, every Friday (if we remember) to prevent you slipping into a Wireless withdrawal coma.

And it's totally FREE! Ain’t we nice? Not got a smartphone?-- You're so yesterday!!

FREEThe content, not the phone!

job TiTle: sTar TrekPUBLICATION: wIreLess mAgAzINeCOLOUrs: 4CTrIm sIze: w 185mm x H 270mm

IN CINEMAS MAY 9 - BOOK NOWStarTrekTheMovie.co.uk#IntoDarkness

wireless magazine - april/may - wales

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