Kicked out kids blog

As the music starts for tonight’s documentary – Kicked Out Kids – my heart begins to beat ten to the dozen. Please system, make them proud, look after these young people, make them feel loved, cared for and special.

Within seconds, my heart feels broken and I realise as Connor and Demornia was introduced, that I would need to watch this documentary in 15-minute bursts. It’s resonating with my story of being ejected and abandoned from the very system, which served to s ave me. I’ve learnt too much about the failure for these young people already. Ten minutes in.

My next fifteen-minute watch takes us through the triumphs of a teacher, Rob, who supported Demornia to find his place of belonging in boxing, and who knew that he was worth something – giving Demornia

the chance to find an attachment to a strong male role model. His brother, who didn't have this, is tragically in prison. He found his place in gangs. Not difficult to see the importance of this man in Demornia’s l ife is it? Why haven’t all young people got a Rob in their l ives?

Back to Connor – in a children’s home for 6 years. 6 years! Settled, happy. Distraught that in his words – “When I leave here, I’m not allowed to come back’. This is inhumane. Absolutely appalling. Heart sorry for him. Am I surprised? No. Would this happen in foster care too. Yes. Staying Put is a vital policy, allowing

kids in foster care to stay until 21. In reality, foster carers can rarely afford to take the cut in allowance. It wouldn't have helped Connor had the policy been in for resi care too. How many private providers off res care for the love of it. Not many.

I rewind to hear Edward Timpson MP again repeat his mantra – children in care deserve the very best. Tears fall. My 15 minutes are up. I can switch off. Lucky me. Jamie appears, a beautiful vivacious young person. ‘I’m moving in with my auntie who I’ve known for 3

weeks. Its family init.’ Out come the black sacks. You know the black sacks that kids in care don’t have any more? Yeah right.

Why wouldn't Jamie move in with an aunt not having known her before? Its what we are taught to accept in care. Move, move move. Don’t attach. Don’t trust. We are not your parents. We are your social workers. A cuddle? Ok then, don’t tel l my manager. Then you become an adult, and are expected to know how to build a stable l ife, full of wonderful attachments to l ife’s objects. It took me 20 years to ‘love’ my home. I

have walked away from houses lock stock and barrel without a care for the bricks and mortar nor the contents. Its what care teaches us. Jemma waits for someone, anyone to help her move, her final day in care. No one comes. There is no

celebration. No huge food shop, dashing to the shops for last minute bits, not even her lea ving care worker. Another worker turns up – looks tired and defeated. Another day in the office.

“I’ve had a few people who have loved me more than the job”. The unsung hero’s . Our Resi workers. Our staff. On loan. Demornier receives a call from his social worker – she won’t be supporting him to move out tomorrow,

she has another young person to see. Oh that's all right then. No matter. It’s not important is it? Jamie has walked out of her aunties after a row – I hear everyone shouting – I told you so. Jamie is

homeless within weeks of leaving care. Then she moves twice. So her journey starts. Demornier leaves the system – his loving supported lodgings lady sheds a tear. Demornier – “I guess that's it then”.

I find myself shouting at the screen, come on Demornier, you can do this – he’s in the ring – the fight that can prove that he’s a success – I scream in happiness as he win’s. Has he won the battle or the fight?

The credits come up – Jamie has recently been evicted from her flat. Seconds before she tells us of loving the thought of starting college. Who has failed Jamie? Who will feel shame and guilt? Not Calderdale Council. Shame on them.

3 young lovable, charming, captivating young people, with broken hearts. Tell me. Where has the ‘care’ in the care system gone?