what to do when you fall back into your old, less productive ways
TRANSCRIPT
Busting Bad Behavior orHow to Stop That Habit from Kicking Your Ass
Have you ever tried to quit your bad behavior?
Was it smoking? Overeating? Being disorganized?
If you have, then you know that it isn’t as easy as it seems.
Busting that bad habit doesn’t happen in a linear way.
Elizabeth Grace Saunders: “New habits happen in a two steps forward, one step back pattern. It’s not just having the right system that matters, but grooving the habit so that you reflexively respond in the correct matter.”
What she means is that it isn’t a matter of having the right SYSTEM, but understanding the habit so you can react PROACTIVELY.
Habits are actually decisions that we once stopped making.
It could be the decision to keep smoking.Or the decision to eat another cookie.Or the decision to watch TV instead of doing homework.
Therefore, we have the power to once again make a decision or atleast, lead ourselves into conditions favorable to making the decision.
So how do you finally kick that bad habit’s ass?
1. Recognize Your Relapse Cue
It’s pointless to blame the system or blame yourself. Instead, see your lapses as an opportunity to create a better outcome in the future.
Tip: Identify the routine leading up to the habit. Did you smoke a cigarette because you were stressed? Did you eat the cake because you were bored?
“being known as a problem solver is a good thing. But when people start looking at you to put out their fires… that is different. They will keep coming back and you will soon be an expected service.
2. Develop a Reward System
Now that you’ve identified your RELAPSE CUE, it’s time for a NEW, EQUALLY PLEASURABLE, and MORE PRODUCTIVE behavior to take its place.
Tip: Craving nicotine at 3pm? Think about taking a stroll to your officemate’s desk for a quick chat instead? Wanting to have a second slice of cake? Maybe phone your children.
3. Celebrate Your Small Victories
Keeping a daily record of your small, but real, victories will help you feel great about yourself and motivated to continue.
Tip: Record your activities. Did you have an apple instead of a steak? Were you too weak to resist the cigarettes today? This record will help you pinpoint what triggers your lapses, and what allows you to stay on track
4. Don’t Sweat It
Excessive worry leads to paranoia and unproductive anxiety. Give yourself permission to fail but continue to focus on the “here” and “now.”
Tip: Letting go of your fear of failing actually lowers your perception of risk, allowing you a greater chance of finally kicking your habit.
The success of your future and your future endeavors depends on how resilient you are.
And anyone who’s ever tried to kick a bad habit knows that this scenario requires ALL THE RESILIENCE in the world.
So do you give up or do you give it another go?
Don’t let it kick your ass any longer.
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