More of the best quotes ever!...

Julianne Redinger

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

-Anonomous

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

- Anonomous

Never fear shadows. They simply mean there's a light shining somewhere nearby.- Anonmous

"What lies beyond us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." - Emerson

Homer Simpson

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

Operator! Give me the number for 911!

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.

“If you’re bored with life — or you don’t get up every morningwith a burning desire to do things — you don’t have enoughgoals.”  -Lou Holtz

No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.

- Anonomous