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Wedding Manual

A collection of resources pulled together by Michael Teulon, to help assist in your Ceremony planning.

General Information Page 2

Framework for a CeremonyPage 6

ExamplesIntroductions Page 7

Giving Away 7

Endorsements Page 18

Asking Page 19

Vows Page 21

Ring ceremonies Page 23

Alternative Inclusions Page 26

Poetry and Readings Page 29

Ph 0412 477 141 www.sydneymarriagecelebrant.info July 2010 Page 1

Ph 0412 477 141 www.sydneymarriagecelebrant.info July 2010

General Information

This manual has been put together to assist in creating your very own Wedding Ceremony.

The Framework and Examples are provided as only a guide. Obviously, you are more than welcome to include them (in part or full) but alternatively, they may also help to stimulate your own creativity, enabling you to write your own ceremony.

Examples are from various sources including; the internet, past clients, material I have written myself and material written by fellow celebrants. The material is intentionally varied to meet the requirements of a diverse range of couples, so I warn you “Read with Caution – some material may offend your taste”.

Creating your own CeremonyI suggest you begin by reading through examples of Full Ceremonies I have included in this folder. This should give you a better feel for the general flow and structure. Once you have done this, you may be in a better position to draft your very own ceremony, and choose specific examples.

Whether you write your own ceremony or personalise an existing one, the most important thing to remember is to “make it yours”. It should reflect you and your partner and what you share.

If you do get stuck I am more than happy to put together a simple ceremony for you, one that you can then personalise. A soft copy of this Manual is available at www.sydneymarriagecelebrant.info.

Structure of a Ceremony

Timing Generally the over all ceremony would be about 30 minutes, from the time the bride arrives through the spoken ceremony, the signing up to the point where people come up to congratulate you. The actual spoken ceremony in this case would last about 10 and 15 minutes. Much longer and you may find your guests losing focus. Remember too, that generally, your guests will be standing for the entire ceremony. Similarly, a ceremony shorter than 5 to 6 minutes may leave your guests wondering “if that was it ?”.

Including OthersYour wedding ceremony, is also a very important occasion for your friends and family, so you may like to include them as well. Traditionally you may like them to be part of the bridal party but you may also wish to include them in other ways. You may like to ask them to give a reading or a blessing. They may perform the role of a ring bearer or an usher. All the parents can be included in an


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Endorsement or the entire guest list can “give you away”. You may also like to ask someone to sing, play music or read a poem. Children can also be included. There is no limit to how you can involve others in your ceremony.

Alternative InclusionsYou may like to include an alternative ceremony as a substitute or in addition to the standard ceremony. Examples may include; a Rose Ceremony, a Ring Warming or a Candle Ceremony. Or maybe there is something a little different like a tree planting ceremony you may like to include.

RehearsalA rehearsal or more accurately a “walk through” serves an important purpose. It enables us to block through the entire ceremony from your arrival to your departure. We can consider and develop a plan to make the whole ceremony flow smoothly on the day and make sure you get exactly what you want. Generally we would hold the rehearsal on location if the venue and distance permitted.(we can discuss this). The rehearsal is generally held about 1 week out from the actual ceremony. The entire bridal party is welcome to attend but this is not necessary (although it can be a good excuse for a social get together and maybe a drink).

Wet Weather OptionAn out door wedding is a fantastic idea but it does leave you vulnerable to the elements. I know it is something that you may not wish to think about but it is important to have a contingency plan, just in case. The reception venue may be able to accommodate – so check with them first. NB Ironically, rain, traditionally is symbol of new life and new beginnings.

Ceremony TimeI would normally suggest that you invite your guest to arrive 10 -15 minutes prior to the time you expect your ceremony to begin. That way you will hopefully avoid your guests racing you “up the aisle”. People can be delayed for various reasons and it is important to remember that it may be the first time many of your guests have been to the particular venue.


Other Important Stuff

Please take this the right way, I definitely don’t want to offend, however I think it is important to ensure we all have the same expectations and thus hopefully avoid misunderstanding and so ensure the perfect ceremony.

Ceremony TimeYou will need to notify me of the ceremony start time when you make your booking. If you wish to change this you will need to confirm with me first in case I have since made additional engagements.

I never like to rush you, but I must reserve the right to leave if your ceremony is delayed by 30 minutes or more. If I can wait, I am happy to, but if I have another engagement I will have to depart and return later to perform the ceremony.

Props, Costumes and MaterialsI can provide you with a PA, signing table and Mont Blanc Pen. However, you are responsible for providing additional props, costumes and equipment if required. Examples: candles. I am always happy to offer advice on where you may be able to source such materials.

Additional ChargesMy price includes my full service however you are responsible for additional, out of pocket, expenses. These include;

Certificate of Marriage – Issued by Births, Deaths and Marriages- OptionalOn your wedding day I will provide you with a Certificate of Marriage from the Commonwealth Government. However, if you would like to receive a Certificate of Marriage from Births, Deaths and Marriages NSW, (required for Change of Name or other legal purposes) you can arrange that directly with B,D and M.

City Parking – Generally around $15-$30.Examples: Ceremonies at the Royal Botanical Gardens, Opera House, Wharfs other City Venues

Taxis and Water Taxis – If your ceremony is on a boat or island I would still arrive 30 minutes prior and would need to leave no longer than 20 minutes after the ceremony. Thus to achieve this I may require you to provide and pay for a Water Taxi.

Distance Travelled to Ceremony - I am happy to travel to venues both for the rehearsal and the actual ceremony which are considered to be within a reasonable distance from my base in


Balmain. Generally, I would consider this to be within a 30 minute radius of Balmain.

Obviously I am happy to travel further a field but I would then need to charge travel time and cost, please feel free to discuss


Payment To guarantee your booking a deposit is required. Until this deposit is received I am unable to confirm your booking. Full payment, including additional charges (parking, Distance, water taxis) must be made, at the latest at our last meeting prior to your wedding day.Note: All prices include GST.

The Resources Manual You are welcome to hang onto the manual up until we see each other at the rehearsal when you can return it in person or post it back to me. However, if you lose the manual or you would like to keep it there is a charge of $15 (replacement value) which will need to be paid in addition to and at the same time as the total fee.

Thank you for taking the time to read through the above, I hope I didn’t sound like I was “laying down the law”. Please feel free to discuss any of the above.

ConclusionStart work on your ceremony and book a rehearsal time and date (with me) as early as possible. That way you will avoid the last minute rush and be able to enjoy the whole process.

Please do not hesitate to call or email me if you have any question.

Good luck and enjoy the process!

Michael TeulonAuthorised Marriage Celebrant


Ceremony Framework and Work SheetYou may use this form to record your selection for your ceremony

StepNo.

Heading in Ceremony Outline

1 Introduction

I will present the Introduction on your behalf. Please enter segment reference for Opening and Body.

“My name is Michael Teulon and I am a Marriage Celebrant, duly authorised to solemnise this marriage, in accordance with the laws of Australia.”

2 Readings

This is generally given by a family member or friend.

Could you also include their name and their relationship to you.

3 Monitum for Marriage

This is the compulsory warning I must give

“Before you I can join you (Full Names) in marriage, in the presence of these witnesses and myself, I must remind you of the solemn and binding nature of the relationship into which you are about to enter. Marriage, according to the law of Australia is the voluntary and full commitment of a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest sense, to the exclusion of all others and entered into for life.”

4 The Giving Away

Could you please state the name of the person & their relationship to you & reference

5 The Asking

6 The Vows “I call upon the persons present to witness that from today

I, Full Name, take you, Full Name, as my husband/wife/ spouse”

7 The Ring Ceremony


8 Declaration of Marriage

Example: “Having now promised to share your lives together, in front of your witnesses and in accordance with your vow, I can now pronounce you, husband and wife. You may kiss the bride”

9 Signing of Register

Please provide Full names of Witnesses and Check witnesses are over 18. If possible, please make sure that a table & chair are available at the venue

10 Congratulations How would you like to be introduced following the signing. Eg. “Nicole and Kevin” or “Mr and Mrs Smith” or “Nicole and Kevin”


IntroductionThe Introduction sets the tone for the ceremony. It gives me (on your behalf) an opportunity to welcome your guests and let them know why they have been invited.

I have split the Introduction into Openings and Bodies to help simplify the process. Feel free to add, delete or mix examples to create your own Introduction – one that reflects you and what you want to say. Minimum Requirement

Legally I must introduce myself as a marriage celebrant and explain that I will be marrying you both. I general include the following somewhere in the opening.“My name is Michael Teulon and I am a Marriage Celebrant, duly authorised to solemnise the marriage here, this afternoon, in accordance with the laws of Australia.”

Introduction – Openings Introduction – Opening 1

To begin, On behalf of Bride and Groom, I would like to welcome you here today.We are all here today to celebrate with Bride and Groom a very important moment in their lives. They started out as friends and have over time learned to know and love each other and have now decided to spend the rest of their lives together, as husband and wife.

Introduction – Opening 2

Bride and Groom have chosen us to be with them on their special day. And I am sure that we are all here to offer our support for this marriage and to wish them every happiness for their lives together.

They are delighted that so many of you have travelled great distances to be with them and hope that this evening is one of happiness, celebration and above all fun.



We are all here today for a very special occasion – Bride and Groom’s wedding. Over the years they have learned to know and love each other and have now, finally decided to join their lives together, a life as husband and wife.


Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my very great pleasure to welcome you to this most joyous occasion – Bride and Groom’s wedding day. They are delighted that you all have been able to join them in this expression of their love for one another, especially those of you who have travelled from great distances to be with them today.


Bride and Groom are pleased that all of you are able to be here today to witness their public affirmation of their partnership as they commit to spend the rest of their lives together – a life as husband and wife. They also wish to make that commitment in the presence of the people who are most important to them – you, their much loved family and friends.


Bride and Groom welcome you here today to share with them their joining together as one. This is a joyous occasion for them as they have decided to seal their love with this marriage, and have invited us to share in their happiness.


Bride and Groom have invited us here to day to witness the commitment they have for each other. Having come together they have decided that they would like to recognise their love for one another in marriage and are delighted you, their friends and family, have made the effort to be here today and support them in their decision.


Bride and Groom welcome you here today to share with them their joining together as one. This is a joyous occasion for them as they have decided to seal their love with this marriage, and have invited us to share in their happiness.



We are here today to share a most important moment in Bride and Groom’s lives.They were lucky enough to find each other in the murky depths of cyber space and were stubborn enough to survive the perils of their first dates.

Now Bride and Groom have come to know and love each other and have decided to declare, in front of old and new friends, their intention to make a life together, a life that will be made with care and love to last a lifetime.


We are here today to share with Bride and Groom a most joyous occasion. They have decided to seal their love with this marriage and have invited us to share in their happiness. Family and friends are important to them, as are traditions, and marriage is one of the most important traditions we follow. From now on each partner will consider the other person's desires and needs are equal, if not more important, to their own.


They feel honoured and privileged that you, their close family and friends, are able to share this special rite of passage with them. For this they give their heartfelt thanks in spite of the honour they have bestowed upon us by asking us to bear witness to such a magical moment in their lives.Bride & Groom want you to know how important you are to them and would like to express their happiness at becoming part of such a loving and supportive family. They feel immensely proud and happy today.


On behalf of Bride and Groom, I would like to welcome you. We are here today on this very special occasion for us all - Bride and Groom’s wedding. They have chosen us to be with them on their special day as they prepare to exchange their marriage vows, as a statement of their caring for us and to


indicate their belief that all of you support them in their decision to be married. We are here to offer our support for this marriage and to wish them every happiness for their life together. They are delighted that many of you travelled from great distances to be with them and hope that the evening is one of joy for you all - as it is for them.


Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, it is my very great pleasure to welcome you to this most joyous occasion – Bride & Groom’s wedding day. They are delighted that you all have been able to join them in this expression of the love for one another, especially those of you who have travelled from great distances to be with them today.

Introduction Body Introduction – Body 1

In society today, marriage has become a less obvious choice for two people in love. "It's just a piece of paper" people say. And in a few minutes I will ask Bride and Groom to sign "a piece of paper" as evidence of their marriage here today. But by the time they sign “the piece of paper” in their hearts and in ours, they will already be married. Because it is not about the scribe on a piece of paper that seals their marriage. It is about the courage and commitment it takes to stand up in front of their friends and family, people they love and respect, and make a promise that will last the rest of your lives. It's a pretty big call.So, family and friends don't think you are here today as innocent bystanders, because you’re not. You are here, today, to participate. You are going to perform a role far more important than any piece of paper. You are here today as witnesses, as Bride and Groom make their promise of love, a potential that will take a life time to fulfil.


Introduction – Body 2

Bride and Groom, believe that marriage is the supreme sharing experience and an adventure in the most intimate of human relationships.

They have chosen to take this step after a short period of time as a statement of confidence in their love and commitment towards each other.

Their belief in the power of the family unit, their shared values and their commitment to maintain their individuality will carry them through the inevitable challenges that life will bring.

They envisage a strong, happy, adventuress and loving union. Through their marriage they hope to maintain above all mutual respect and support as each other’s best friend


Marriage is a commitment to life - to the best that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities, sharing and growth no other human relationship can equal. A physical and emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime.

Within the circle of love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener and critic.Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes love is unable to avoid. It encourages new experiences and new ways of expressing love through the seasons of life.


When two people pledge to love and care for each other in marriage, they create a spirit unique to themselves, which binds them closer than any spoken or written words.Marriage is a promise, a potential made in the hearts of two people in love, which takes a lifetime to fulfil.

Introduction - Body 4

Bride and Groom, were lucky enough to find each other in the murky depths of Newtown and were stubborn enough to survive the perils of courtship – not to mention lucky enough to survive a couple of years in Adelaide!

Vital to their success as a couple was realising very early on that the limelight wasn’t big enough for both of them, so they made the limelight bigger. With insights like this it was only a matter of time before one hot summer night, whilst sitting drunkenly in their underpants, they both came to the conclusion that marriage was a fabulous idea.


Marriage, is a big and serious undertaking. As Rainer Maria Rilke said: “More belongs to marriage than four legs in a bed. “and there is no sure-fire do-it-yourself kit. This ceremony celebrates the net of friendships within which Bride and Groom’s relationship began and affirms their belief in the necessity of friendships for their relationship to thrive. Bride and Groom need to have you all around.Above all, this is a joyful occasion. Bride and Groom choose to affirm and express their love by getting married. Their wedding ceremony is a special, spiritual place where their joy can be shared with you all and so increased and strengthened. (Explain about the rings) These wedding rings represent the never-ending cycles of giving and receiving, and the birth, death and rebirth of life and love. Please pass them around. Let your hands and heart hold them for a moment and let them come back to Bride and Groom full of your warmth.


Bride and Groom understand that there are no guarantees in marriage. Marriage is a work of love. It calls for two people to


remain individuals while building around themselves a world that they call their own. Real love is not being totally absorbed in each other. It is looking outward in the same direction, together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger so you can reach out and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone.

Together you will face the challenges life will inevitably throw at you. At these times; always speak the truth and listen attentively, inspire each other, say "I love you" often and laugh a lot too, even when you're angry, and remember you are each other's best friend.


Family and friends are important to Bride & Groom, as are rites of passage, and Marriage is one of the most important rites we follow. It is a sharing of goals and decision-making. A commitment from the heart and mind based on mutual love, trust, respect and the understanding that from now on, each partner will consider the other's desires and needs as equal to their own.

Real love between a man and a woman is unconditional and perhaps the highest experiences that is possible to humankind. Such love reduces selfishness, deepens personalities, promotes growth, but above all, gives life new purpose and meaning.

When we think about this union between Bride and Groom we take heart; this marriage encourages all of us, because when a man and a woman find this kind of joy and happiness in their lives, it says something to all mankind of the possibilities in life.


We have all been invited to assemble here on this happy day to witness the official union of these two lovers, and to join in the public celebration of their joy and delight in finding one another. Let us all be together in friendship and love, sharing this scene and these precious moments which join this couple. Bride and Groom let us consider the belief that you have in each other, and the fact that you are ready to proclaim publicly


to us, your love, in this special rite of passage, as you move from being single to the permanent status of a married couple.


In deciding upon a suitable introduction, Bride & Groom came to the only conclusion. Their love is so total that they consider it a precious gift. They will nurture it through all its stages of development. They know this will not be an easy commitment, but intend to honour the privilege of its blessing. Bride and Groom are thankful that they have found such happiness in each other, and even more thankful that you have joined in this beautiful and traditional sharing of its expression.


Bride and Groom are pleased that all of you are able to be here today to witness their public affirmation of their partnership as they commit to spend the rest of their lives together – a life as husband and wife. They also wish to make that commitment in the presence of the people who are most important to them – you, their much loved family and friends.

Bride and Groom have chosen to take this step of marriage to say to the world "We are together, we are a team and we have something very special we would like to acknowledge". Through their marriage Bride and Groom also have the opportunity to create something new and exciting together. They envisage a strong, joyful and happy union.

Their marriage will be based on values of acceptance, respect, sharing, openness and unconditional love given freely to each other. Through their marriage, they will be each other's best friend as well as lover.


Bride & Groom believe that a happy marriage will enable them to establish a home where there will be love and stability. A home where you, their family and their friends, will find


welcome, peace, love and support, strengthened today, by this ceremony.

Bride & Groom are ecstatic that their experiences have brought them to the place where they are ready to fulfil what is theirs to accomplish in this life, to join the forces of their individual spirits, capabilities, and backgrounds. Therefore, we celebrate with them their arrival at the portal of true conscious loving and are honoured to witness this joyous occasion in their lives.


Real love in marriage is something beyond the warmth and glow, the excitement and romance of being deeply in love. It is caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your marriage partner as about your own. But real love is not being totally absorbed in each other. It is looking outward in the same direction, together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger so you can reach out and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone.

The beautiful thing about love is that it’s an experience we share with the whole of mankind throughout the world. And yet, to everyone who falls in love, it is the most unique, precious thing in the world. A really happy marriage is founded on love and friendship. There is nothing in life that love cannot change. Love is, of its nature, unselfish, understanding and kind. True love, too, is a commitment of heart and mind. There can be no stronger bond to ensure a happy married life. There can be only one, it’s a kind of magic.


The wonderful thing about Bride and Grooms decision to marry is that they didn’t have to in this day and age, which makes the decision all the more special and meaningful. Marriage for


Bride and Groom does not mean a loss of individuality, rather it represents to them an expansion of support and resources, so that individually they can better realise their own goals and ambitions.

Though the opportunity was there for them to live together as a De facto couple, they have chosen to take this step of marriage so as to say to the world "We are together, we are a team and we have something very special we would like to acknowledge".

Through their marriage Bride and Groom also feel they will find strength through commitment that is borne of a true desire to face the world together and to feel secure in the knowledge that each has made a commitment to the other, and to enjoy the freedom which that decision brings.


Bride and Groom today you affirm your love for the other, the one you have laughed with and cried with, the one you have learned from and shared with, the one you have chosen to support encourage and give yourself to, through all the days given you to share. Today you affirm your lifelong commitment to each other.Every love story in its own way has certain greatness. There is often the untold history of physical and mental hardship, the fear and agony of difficult decision making, the shattering darkness of the great breaks in life's pattern, and then almost unbelievably, the light at the end of the tunnel. True love, traditions tell us, never runs smoothly, but there does come a time when the forces which have sought to destroy it, admit defeat and disintegrate, and love triumphs.


This is a happy occasion when Bride and Groom stand before us to declare and celebrate their love. Their path has not been easy, but they believe that what has emerged was worth the hardship they have endured.If we recognise that life at its deepest and most personal must be selfless and loving to bring human happiness, then so it must be in the wider community. It is to celebrate this marriage that we are now assembled and the happy memories will remain with Bride and Groom from this time on.


This is the time and place chosen by Bride and Groom to allow us, their family and friends to share the radiance of their love for one another. A love that is solely experienced by Bride and Groom, as they prepare to exchange their marriage vows.

These vows unite them in a relationship that is founded on love, trust, honesty and mutual respect. And they are more than mere words; these vows are the expression of an emotion that two individuals cherish between themselves. An emotion that unites them as only they can fully understand.

There are no guarantees in a marriage. Marriage is a work of love. It calls for two people to share their vision of life, with tolerance, patience, understanding and love. It calls for two people to remain individual while building around themselves a world that they call their own. A world which is full of their hopes, their dreams of love and their happiness, a beautiful world of peace and contentment in which they are equally strong as they support and love one another through the inevitable challenges that life will present them with.

Marriage is not an easy commitment, but we can all be sure that Bride and Groom have already built the foundations for such a wonderful relationship to continue to grow, and to blossom, as the years strengthen their love and life together. We, who are witnesses to this marriage between Bride and Groom, sincerely wish them all happiness and prosperity in their lives together.



We are gathered here, not to witness the beginning of what will be, but rather what already is! We do not create this marriage, because we cannot. We can and do, however, celebrate with Bride & Groom and their families, the wondrous and joyful occurrence that has already taken place in their lives. So let the celebration begin!


This marriage ceremony is a celebration of human destiny. It acknowledges that this union will have, as one of its major commitments, the willingness of each partner to search for, discover, and support one another as they commit to maintain their individuality through their journey together.


Always speak the truth and listen attentively, so that you may understand each other's thoughts and intentions. Inspire each other by sharing your accomplishments. Say "I love you" often to retain the warmth between you. Laugh a lot too, even when you're angry, and remember you are each other's best friend.

Stand together and for each other always, be content in mind and spirit and make each day a blessing and fulfilment of your dreams


Bride and Groom have chosen to marry today because they have something very special they would like to acknowledge. They are delighted that they have been so lucky to find that one person, in a world of many, that makes them whole. They have discovered that their soul mate, that person that they are going to spend the rest of their life together. They are ecstatic. They want to share this happiness with the people they care the most about, their close friends and family, so have asked us here so they can make public affirmation. .


This marriage ceremony is a celebration of human destiny. It acknowledges that this union will have, as one of its major commitments, the willingness of each partner to search for,


discover and support one another as they commit to maintain their individuality through their journey together.From now on each partner will consider the other person's desires and needs are equal, if not more important, to their own.


Giving AwayTraditionally the bride will be “Given Away by her Father” but this role may be performed by someone else if you wish. Example; Mother, Brother, Sister, Children

Feel free to add, delete or mix examples to create your own Giving Away Ceremony.

Minimum Requirement

Nil

Giving Away 1

When people discuss what really matters in life, they always conclude what they really value is human relationships, their relationship with friends and family. One of the longest and strongest relationships we have is that between a Father and his Daughter. However, it is only on rare occasions that this relationship is recognised and today is one of them.

Brides Father’s Name represents his family here today, but in a special gesture he symbolises his own personal love for his daughter, Bride. So mindful of these values I now ask him – Bride Father’s Name do you bring Bride to be married to Groom? Father: I do.

Giving Away 2

Who gives Bride to be married to Groom?Giver: I do.

Giving Away 3

Traditionally, it was the custom for a young woman to be under the authority and protection of the man of the house. When she married, the responsibility passed to her husband. This was the origin of the "Giving away" ceremony. Things have changed and so have women. But in keeping with tradition we still ask, but more as a symbol of respect for Brides Father rather than the exchange of a chattel. With this in mind, I now ask


Do you Bride’s Father give Bride to be married to Groom?

Bride’s Father: I do.Giving Away 4

Who brings Bride to be married to Groom?Bringer: I do.


EndorsementThe endorsement is an alternative to the Giving Away Ceremony or may be in addition.It offers the opportunity of more than one person being involved. It also avoids the idea of someone being given away like a possession.

Feel free to add, delete or mix examples to create your own Endorsement Ceremony.

Minimum Requirement

Nil

Endorsement 1

Parents

Bride & Groom are happy that their parents are here to witness this pledge of their commitment to one another. They ask that their parents endorse this marriage and that they help uphold the ideals Bride and Groom are expressing today. So I now ask of the parents: (Insert their Names here) Do you offer Bride and Groom your love and support for their future life together?

Parents: We Do

Endorsement 2

Group

Ladies and Gentlemen, Bride and Groom and requested that you all be included in their circle of love by becoming involved in their ceremony; they have requested that you give them to each other in marriage, that you all collectively give them away. So mindful of this I now ask of you, friends and families of Bride and Groom, please say “We do” if you bring Bride and Groom to be married to each other.

Guests “We Do”


THE ASKINGThis is probably the most recognisable part of a Wedding Ceremony, although it is not a compulsory component in Australia.

I have included traditional examples below but you may also like to give them your own flavour and add a smile. By personalising the Asking Ceremony it “pulls together” your guests, because they will recognise you in the ceremony.

Examples:

1. Bride and Groom, before you make your marriage vows, I must ask, do you each promise to continue your love … of cheap red wine, eighties music and spending the whole of Sunday in your Pyjamas?

Bride and Groom: We do.

2. Do you Bride promise that you will accept Groom’s obsession with his plasma TV also promise to share your doona with him during the Sunday night movie?Bride: I will

Do you Groom promise to wait patiently out side shoe shops while Bride tries on six pairs of new shoes, knowing that she has 2 pairs in the wardrobe, that she has never worn.Groom: I will You may include anything, but if it reflects you, particularly things about you that other people will recognise it can be a great way of pulling all your guests together and maybe even putting a smile on their face.

Minimum Requirement

Nil

Asking 1

Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your lawful wife/husband/spouse.Groom/Bride: I will


Asking 2

Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your lawful wife/husband, to share your life with her/him, and do you pledge that you will love, honour and care for her/him, with tenderness and affection, through all the varying experiences of your life?Groom/Bride: I will.

Asking 3

Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your life long partner. Do you promise that you will love, listen and learn from him/her every day so that you may share your dreams and your future together forever.Groom/Bride: I will.

Asking 4

Will you take Groom/Bride to be your wife/husband?, will you make the daily effort to relate to her/him and listen to her/him. Groom/Bride: I will.

Asking 5

Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your lawful wife/husband. Will you love her/him, comfort her/him, honour and cherish her/him in times of sickness and health and forsaking all others be true only to her/him as long as you both shall live?Groom/Bride: I will.

Asking 6

Groom and Bride, now that you are about to enter the magic and mysteries of marriage, do you choose still and happily, in our midst, to make these promises together?Groom & Bride: together We Do.

Asking 7

Groom/Bride, Will you take Groom/Bride to be your wife/husband and your lifelong partner. Will you constantly try to stay aware of your relationship with her/him, striving to communicate with her/him, be sensitive to her/his needs,


wanting her/his success and happiness through all the years ahead?Groom/Bride: I will.


THE VOWSYour Vows are the heart of your Ceremony. This is when you make your commitment to one another. You make a promise, in front of your witnesses, which will last a life time. (Don’t mean to scare you)

This section you must actually speak the words your self (it’s the law). So you can memorise your vows or you can repeat them after me, or a mix of bother.

Minimum Requirement

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, I Names, take you, Names to be my wife/husband/spouse

Vow 1

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, I Names, take you, Names to be my wife/husband/spouse

Vow 2

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, Their Name, I choose you to share my life as my wife/husband. I love you for yourself and will love you through good fortune and adversity, while we both shall live.

Vow 3

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, I Names, take you, Names to be my wife/husband/spouseI, Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband, my lover and my friend, the one I will live with, laugh and dream with. I promise to love you, cherish and respect you, throughout our lives together.

Vow 4

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward through good times as well as bad and I promise to be true to you as long as we both shall live.


Vow 5

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today Name I declare my love for you. I take you as my wife/husband. I invite you to share your life with me. I promise always to respect your needs and to accept you as you are. I will be honest with you in thought word and deed. I truly love you.

Vow 6

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today Name, I declare my love for you, I NAME take you, NAME as my Husband/Wife/Spouse. I invite you to share my life me. I promise to be kind, unselfish and trusting. I will work for a happy life for both of us. This is my solemn vow.

Vow 7I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you Name as my Wife/Husband/Spouse. I give myself to you,. and I promise to love and cherish you for all the days of my life.

Vow 8

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband/spouse. Today I pledge my love to you, to be given without restraint. I lay my life in your keeping and will do my utmost to protect yours. I'll care for you though illness and rejoice in your health. My wealth is yours to share, as are our burdens and our losses. Your every breath is sacred to me and should death ever separate us, I vow my love shall be undying.

Vow 9

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband, and I agree to be your loving wife/husband.

Vow 10

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for


poorer, in times of happiness as well as adversity, while we both shall live.

Vow 11

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name, take you Name as my wife/husband/spouse. I vow to love you no matter what happens to you or us. I will share all the possessions that I own with you. I will be supportive and loyal to you in every way possible; I will be faithful to you forsaking all others; and I will be your ever present friend, your constant lover and your lifelong spouse.

Vow 12

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband/spouse. All that I am I give to you and all that I have I share with you. Whatever the future holds I will love and stand by you throughout our lives together. This is my solemn vow.

Vow 13

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today Name, I now join my life with you as I take you as my Husband/Wife/Spouse. A life to be lived with love, honesty and trust, to communicate fully, to care for you and to share all I can, so that we may grow together and as individuals. This is my promise for our life together.

Vow 14

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today From this day I take you, my darling, Name to be my wife/husband/spouse, to live with you and laugh with you; to stand by your side and sleep in your arms; to be joy to your heart and food to your soul; to bring out the best in you always; and, for you, to be the most that I can. To laugh with you in the good times; to struggle with you in the bad; to console you when you are downhearted; to wipe your tears with my hands; to comfort you with my body; to mirror you with my soul; to share with you all my riches and honours until we grow old.

Vow 15


I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name take you Name to be by wife/husband/spouse, to love you and to cherish you. To help you and to honour you, to give you understanding and comfort, in whatever the future may bring, in confidence that together, we are responsible for our destiny.

Vow 16

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name take you Name to be my husband/wife/spouse. To be no other than yourself. Loving what I now of you, trusting what I do not yet know, with respect for your integrity and faith in your love for me, through all the years and in all that life may bring us, this is my pledge to you.

Vow 17

I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you, Name to be my wife/husband/spouse and life partner.To laugh with you in the good times; to struggle with you in the bad;to solace you when you are downhearted; to wipe your tears with my hands;to comfort you with my body; to mirror you with my soul;to share with you all my riches and honours; beyond when we both grow old.


RING CEREMONYThe exchange of rings may be prefaced by an introduction. It may simply be a connection between the Vow and the exchange of rings or explain more about the tradition or symbolism of rings.

Following the introduction, each the Bide and Groom, will make a statement as they exchange/ receive their ring.The classic example of this would be “With this ring I thee wed”

Minimum Requirement

Nil

Ring Introduction

Ring Introduction 1

Traditionally, the passage to the status of husband and wife is marked by the exchange of rings. These rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning and no end. Love freely given has no giver and no receiver – for each is the giver and each is the receiver of love. May these rings remind you always of the vows you have taken here today.

Ring Introduction 2

The perfect circle of a ring symbolizes eternity. As you give these rings to each other, our wish is that your love will be as eternal and everlasting as these rings. In the years to come, they will remind you of the overwhelming joy of this special occasion. May you always be as happy together as you are today.

Ring Introduction 3

As you exchange these rings today, they will become a practical reminder of your vows. So use them. When you are dealing with one of life’s challenges may the look or the touch


of these rings remind you of the joy, happiness and love you are sharing today.


Ring Exchange 1

Groom/Bride, wear this ring, and the world will know that I am yours and you are mine.

Ring Exchange 2

With this ring I thee wed and I make you a promise that from this day forward, you shall not walk alone. My heart will be your shelter and my arms will be your home.

Ring Exchange 3

Groom/Bride with this ring I give you my personal gift and my personal promise of love, trust and pride that you are my wife/husband

Ring Exchange 4

With this ring, I thee wed, wear it with love and as a symbol of all we share.

Ring Exchange 5

Groom/Bride I place this ring on your finger, with the dream of a never-ending love, just like the circle of this ring, wear it with love and faith as a reminder of my love for you.

Ring Exchange 6

With this ring, I give you my heart and my love, and my promise, of love, trust and pride that you are my husband/wife.

Ring Exchange 7 – One ring only

Bride/Groom: I place this ring on your finger, wear it as our symbol of eternal love and all we share

Bride/Groom, I thank you for this beautiful ring I accept it as a symbol that we are one with each other. This ring will remind me of you and I will wear it with love all my life

Ring Exchange 8

Bride/ Groom: With this ring, I give you my heart, my love and my credit card, and my promise, of love, trust and pride that you are my wife/ husband.


Bride/ Groom: With this ring, I give you my heart, my love and I accept your credit card, and my promise, of love, trust and pride that you are my wife/husband.

Poetry and ReadingsI Treasure Your Friendshipby Larry S. Chengges

There is no greater treasurethan an understanding friendwho's there in times of troubleand on whom we can depend.

A friend who knows our every moodand brightens cloudy days,one who's slow to criticise,but quick to offer praise.

One who shares our happy timesand gives them added worth,who adds a touch of heavento all our days on earth.

There is no greater treasurethan a friend who always cares,one who will always remember usevery day throughout the year.

FriendshipBy Judy Bielicki

It is often said that it is love that makes the world go round. However without doubt, it is friendship that keeps our spinning existence on an even keel.

True friendship provides so many of the essentials for a happy life - it is the strong foundation on which to build an enduring relationship, it is the mortar which bonds us together in harmony, and it is the calm, warm protection we sometimes need when the world outside seems cold and chaotic.

True friendship hold a mirror to our foibles and failings, without destroying our sense of worthiness.


True friendship nurtures our hopes, supports us in our disappointments, and encourages us to grow to our best potential.

(Name and Name) come together as friends. Today, they pledge to each other their love, but also the strength, warmth and, most importantly, the fun of true friendship.


To My very Good FriendBy Laura Medley

We have all had many friendsthroughout our lives,but only a few of those friendswe would call good friends,That's because being a good friendinvolves time and understanding and love, which can be difficult to share with another.When I think of my good friends,I always think about you,because that is what you have been to me.You have taken the timeto be there when I needed you,and you have listened to mewhen my life was changing.You have always cared enoughto try to understand my feelingsand help me to understand myself.And, most important,your consideration and honestyhave shown methat your friendship is true…symbolising a very special kind of lovethat only a few friendsever share with one another.Thank you for being sucha good friend to me,and for all the joys we have known together.

To Keep Your Marriage Brimming By Ogden Nash To keep your marriage brimmingwith love in the loving cup,Whenever you're wrong admit it;Whenever you're right shut up.


I CARRY YOUR HEART WITH ME(I carry it in my heart)By E.E.Cummings

I carry your heart with me(I carry it in my heart)I am never without it(anywhere I go you go, my dear;and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling I fear no fate, my sweet) I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

Everyone Needs SomeoneBy Helen Steiner Rice.

People need people and friends need friendsAnd all need love for a full life dependsNot on vast riches or great acclaimNot on success or on worldly fame,

But just in knowing that someone cares,And holds us close in their thoughts and prayers.For only the knowledge that we're understood,Makes everyday living feel wonderfully good,

And we rob ourselves of life's greatest needWhen we "lock up our hearts and fail to heed"The outstretched hand reaching to find,A kindred spirit whose heart and mind

Are lonely and longing to somehow shareOut joys and sorrows and to make us awareThat life's completeness and richness dependsOn the things we share with our loved ones and friends.3


Love By Rod Mckuen

LoveLove, puts the music in laughter,the beauty in song,the warmth in a shoulder,the gentle in strong.Love puts the magic in memories,the sunshine in skies,the gladness in giving,the starlight in eyes.Love puts the fun in together,the sad in apart,the hope in tomorrow,the joy in the heart.

Give YourselfBy Unknown

Give yourself to one another completely.Be generous in your giving and make no conditions for these gifts.Love one another constantly and fully.Be humble in your acceptance of your partner's love.Be honest with each other.Be thankful for each other's love and strive to develop its richness day by day.Respect each other in every way.Be patient with each other's weaknesses and accept each other for what you are, not what you wish one another to be.Communicate constantly with one another.Be calm, patient, tolerant and reasonable in your communication.Be capable of good listening.Share with one another misfortune and fortune alike.Be compassionate and express your love for one another constantly.Know your limitation and be honest with yourself as you are with one another.Fuse your souls into one another and be happy for the love you have been so fortunate to find in one another.


What is RealAn excerpt from the book “The Velveteen Rabbit”, by Margery Williams:

“What is ‘real’?” asked the rabbit one day, “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?”“’Real isn’t how you are made,” said the skin horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a person loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become real.”“Does it hurt?” asked the rabbit.“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are real you don’t mind being hurt.”“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”“It doesn’t happen all at once”, said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand

The Greatest Prize Already Won

Today is our day of celebration, As today we're off and running,Life is a journey; a fast-paced race,The corks are popped and the champagne bubbling.

Run with me along the grassy mile,I promise you a life of fun,Whatever we do we'll have the best of times,Until the race is won. Life with you is a sure-way bet,Unbridled, unfettered and free,We journey as each other's favourite,There is no other for me. Life races by at a frenetic pace,To the sound of a thundering roar,But the wonderful opportunities of lifeAre the tracks we are yet to explore. There are many barriers and hurdles,To jump along the way,But we'll face the challenges head-on together,And from our track we'll never stray. I promise you an exciting ride,A walk, a run; oft times a hop,Ever special, always fun,


As long as I'm on top! There'll be many moments to capture,Celebrations in the sun,Our happiness a photo finish,The greatest prize already won.

The Art of Marriage

A good marriage must be created.In the art of marriage the littlethings are the big things.It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue through all the years.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitudeof duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.

It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstratinggratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo

or the wife to have wings of an angel. It is not looking for perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and asense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere inwhich each can grow.

It is finding room for the things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good andthe beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual andthe obligation is reciprocal. It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.


The Matrimonial Stakes by A.B. "Banjo" Paterson

I wooed her with a steeplechase, I won her with a fall,I made her heartstrings quiver on the flatWhen the pony missed his take-off, and we crashed into the wall;Well, she simply had to have me after that!

It awoke a thrill of interest when they pulled me out for deadFrom beneath the shattered ruins of a horse;And although she looked indifferent when I landed -- on my head --In the water, it appealed to her, of course!

When I won the Flappers' Flatrace it was "all Sir Garneo",For she praised the way I made my final run.And she thought the riding won it -- for how could the poor girl knowThat a monkey could have ridden it and won!

Then they "weighed me in" a winner -- it's not often that occurs!So I didn't let my golden chances slip,For I showed her all the blood-marks where I jabbed him with the spurs,And the whip-strokes where I hit him with the whip.

Then I asked her if she loved me, and she seemed inclined to shirkFor a moment, so I took her by the head(So to speak) and rushed her at it; and she seemed to like the workWhen she kissed me, though she blushed a rosy red.

She's a mouth as soft as velvet, and she plenty has of heart,I could worship every little step she takes;And the saddle-bell is ringing, so we're going to the start,Certain winners for the Matrimonial Stakes!


‘The Nicest Feeling’by Barin Taylor

The Nicest Feeling I’ve Known Is Being In Love With You!For bringing me happinessas though it were a giftI could open every day….. I thank you.

For listening to the wordsI want to say….. I appreciate you.

For letting me share the mostpersonal parts of your world,and for welcoming me withyour eyes….. I am grateful to you.

For being the wonderful, kind,giving person you are….. I admire you.

For being the most beautifullight in my life….. I desire you.

For being everything you are to me,and for doing it so beautifully….. I love you.

The Secret of a Beautiful MarriageIf you can love each otherThrough the sunshine and the storm,And keep the flame of true devotionGlowing bright and warm;If you can give each other roomTo grow and change and learn,Yet still hold one another closeIn mutual concern;If you can be both loversAnd the very best of friends,And face together, hand in hand,The challenges life sends….If you can offer patience, comfort,And real understanding,Encourage one another’s efforts,Yet be undemanding;If you can show true love and faith


In everything you do,Then married love will surely holdMuch joy for both of you.

Union Garden by Christine Byrnes

Today this Two become as One,New life in a garden has begunGarden of Life – this union akinThe Union Garden shall begin All it took was just one small seed, Then friendship grew a further need.So love between these two it grewAnd now these words I give to you: A great garden needs effort & time,Tender it always, rain and sunshine.A new garden is fresh and bareThe earth is soft, so tread with care. Take pleasure in all the new growth,That’s comes within & before you both.Feed it with kindness, patience, and trustShower with praise, laughter and lust. Each living thing needs room to grow,So don’t overcrowd whenever you sow.For the oak grows - not in the shadeNeither the gum, willow, nor jade. The seasons they come, and they goGive each space: to blossom and grow.May your roots grow deep in the soil.Savour the fruits of all your toil With scent of jasmine and the roseThe lemon thyme between your toesBreath-in the sweet scent of the flowersLove intoxicates - with perfume powers. An untended garden may wither & dieSo give of your self - all that you try.Don’t be afraid to dig in the earthLet not the weeds take centre, nor girth. Be the evergreen - remain bold & trueSparkle and shine like the morning dew;This Union is the elixir of life,


Today the joining of man and wife.Take time to share, to have and to holdFrom this day forward, may it unfoldAnd so this Union is like a garden, May it be strong, majestic, and everlastingNo longer they’re the wind blown seed, Now, go and walk the grounds with thee.

The ProphetBy Kahlil Gibran

Love one another,But make not a bond of love,Let it rather be a moving seaBetween the Shores of your soulsFill each other’s cupBut drink not from the same cupSing and dance together and be joyous,But let each one of you be aloneThough they quiver with the same musicGive your hearts,But not into each other’s keepingFor only the hand of lifeCan contain your heartsAnd stand togetherYet not too near togetherFor the pillars of the temple stand apartAnd the oak tree and the cypressGrow not in each other’s shadow

I Love You – Means Forever"I love you,” means that I accept you for the person you are,and that I don't wish to change you into someone else.It means that I do not expect perfection from you,just as you don't expect it from me......

"I love you" means that I will love you and stand by youeven through the worst of times.It means loving you when you're in a bad moodor too tired to do the things I want to do.It means loving you when you're down,not just when you're fun to be with.

"I love you" means that I know your deepest secretsand do not judge you for them, asking in returnonly that you do not judge me for mine.It means that I care enough to fight for what we haveand that I love enough not to let go.


It means thinking of you, dreaming of you,wanting and needing you constantly,and hoping you feel the same way for me."I love you".....means forever.


The Thoughts of Nanushka

May your friendship and trust endure and strengthenthrough the winter of your lives -and may your love be renewed as surely as the blossomsadorn the trees each spring -may your understanding of each other grow with your loveuntil the wonder of each night and daybecomes a lifetime of happiness together –

I love you so many ways

In so many ways....I love you.You may never think aboutwhat a special person you are,or all the many ways you're loved,but I know how I feelwhen I think about you,when I look at you,and when I hold you.I always want you near me,with the happiness we find together in love.....


TodayAdapted from Bertrand Russell

Today you marry your best friendthe one you have laughed with and cried withthe one you have learned from and shared withthe one you have chosen to support, encourage and give yourself tothrough all the days given you to shareToday you marry the one you love

My Love

It means so much to have youas the source of my laughter and smiles,as the person with whom to sharemy little secrets and big dreams,my fondest memoriesand most important plans.Every day,remember that I love you.In my eyes, in my mind,and in my heart,you are like no other,and there will always bea special place in my life just for you.

To My WifeBy Brian Zouch

Upon this day I pledge my allto you and only youAnd never shall love’s blossom fallthrough any act I doMy love for you is pure and strongmy eye for you aloneI take your hand and guide you onin each our hearts a homeThis boundless love I have for youI give in charge this dayThat you shall know, all other too,‘tis not a game I playFrom this day on, we wedded livetwo lives to be as oneThis gift of love to you I giveTo never be undoneSo Journey on life’s road with meand say for all to knowOur love is deeper than the sea


and yet has much to grow


This Dayby Brian Zouch

This day you shall remember wellAs in your married love you dwellAnd cast your minds back to the timeYou made each other's hearts entwine.

In wedded love you choose to beEach binding each and yet each freeAs days and months and years go on Your love will hold you firm and strong

The marriage vow this day you sayA vow you'll build on day by dayAnd as you walk the path of life The world will know you're man and wife

You two who now are but one soulHave each to play a different roleFor in this life you each shall careThat all you do is all times fairYou pledge this day to be as oneIn all those wondrous years to come.

Evermore

Today as you make your marriage vowsand all your dreams come true.May the happiness that love endowsForever be with you.

If a problem arises, as well it mayLet patience be your guideWithin your hearts do not dismayAs love is true and tried.

Throughout the years that lie ahead as the wings of life unfold The loving words each have saidOn a scroll of gold are told.

For as you open love's hallowed doorand you join as man and wifeMay your love be strong for evermoreTo last throughout your life


Marriage

If two are caring, as they're sharing life's hopes and fearsIf the music of laughter outweighs sadness of tearsMarriage is togetherness.

If both derive pleasure from mere presence of each otherYet when parted no jealousies restrict, worry or smotherMarriage is freedom.

If achievements mean more when they benefit twoAnd consideration is shown with each point of viewMarriage is respect.

And if togetherness, freedom and respect are combinedWith a joy that words can never fully definethen Marriage is Love.

The Gift of Love.

The devotion a man and a woman may feel each for the otherIs the great and eternal mystery of this world of ours.

We see it always, know joy beyond measure in its findingFind fulfilment and happiness in its sharingWe need not understand only acknowledge and cherish its existence.

Life has the capacity to bring great sorrow as well as great happinessBut no matter what the adversity Its pain will yield to the acknowledgment of loveAnd the acceptance of life

So keep open your hearts, be true to your souls.You will remember always that the greatest gift of all is loveGiven and received without reservationWith humility and gratitude

It forms of itself a buttress, a haven,A strength that never wanes or weakens,but grows more wonderful, more unconquerableDay by DayAnd enables life to become An exciting and satisfying experience


Forever Friendship

Sometimes in life, you find a special person,Someone who changes your life by being a part of it.Someone who convinces you that there is an unlocked door, just waiting for you to open it.This is forever friendship.

When you're down, and the world seems dark and empty,Your forever friend lifts you up in spirit, and makes that dark and empty world - Suddenly seem bright and full.

Your forever friend gets you through the hard times,the sad times and the confused times.If you turn and walk away, your forever friend follows,If you lose your way, your forever friend guides you and cheers you on.

Your forever friend holds your hand and tells you that everything is going to be okay.And when you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete, because you need not worry.You have a forever friend for life, and Forever, has no end.

This is why I love you

For the kindness in your eyesand the warmth in your voice for the honesty of your wordsand the silence in your smilefor the ways in which we're similarand those in which we're worlds apart

I love youfor the openness of your understandingand the acceptance of your heartfor the tenderness of your touchand the strength of your commitment

for your sense of humourand your seriousness of purposefor a thousand small reasonsand one most important of all -simply because you are you.


I Promise

I promise to give you all my love for now and forever,to keep your love closeso that we will never grow apart.

I promise to confide in you if I feel insecure.I promise to look back on the good and bad times with a smile,to learn by each mistake and know that with every step of success,we will make it, if we just try.

I promise to offer you all the happinessI am capable of giving you,to see that the future is ours,to make the very best of.

I promise to set time aside to be best friends,to dream dreams and make them reality,and just to say...."I love you"....


Always

I will always accept the way you are, I fell in love with you for the qualities, abilities and the outlook on life that you have,and I won't try to reshape you in a different image.I will always respect you,as a person with your own interests,desires and needs, and to realise that those are sometimes different.......but no less important than my own.I will always share with you,my time, my close attention,and to bring joy and strength and imagination to our relationship.I will always pledge to keep myself open to you,to let you see through the window of my personal world,into my innermost fears and feelings,secrets and dreams.I will always promise to grow along with you,and to be willing to face changeas we both change in order to keep ourrelationship alive and exciting.I will always love you in good times and in bad,with all I feel inside..... in the only way I know how,completely and forever.

The Newly Wedded By Winthrop Mackworth Praed

Now the rite is duly done,Now the word is spoken,And the spell has made us oneand never can be broken:Rest we, dearest, in our home,Roam we over the heather,We shall rest, and we shall roam,Shall we not? together.

From this hour the summer roseSweeter breaths to charm us;From this hour the winter snowsLighter fall to harm us:Fair or foul -- on land or sea --Come the wind or weather,Best or worst, whatever they be,


We shall share together.


Apache Wedding Prayertranslator unknown

Now you will feel no rain,for each of you will be a shelter to the otherNow you will feel no cold,for each of you will be warmth to the other,Now there is no loneliness;For each will be companion to the other.

Now you are two persons,but there is only one life before you.and in your dwelling place,enter into your days together,

And may your days be good and long on the earth.

Destiny (From the American Wedding Album)

Let this be our destiny…to love, to live,to begin each new day together,to share our lives forever.

Benediction of the American IndiansNow you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other.Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.Now you will not be lonely for each of you will be companion to the other.

Now you are two persons, but there are three lives before you: his life, her life and your life together.Go now to your dwelling place, to enter into the days of your life together. May beauty surround you both in the journey aheadand through all the yearsMay happiness be your companionto the place where the river meets the sun,And may your days together be good and long upon this earth.


Our Relationship

Some people believe that with timerelationships become less interestingless exciting and less fun.But our relationship with timehas become more interestingmore exciting and more fun.

Some people believethat with time the best aspects of a relationship end.But with time our relationshiphas become better and betterand our love has become stronger and stronger....

Our relationship is the most importantpart of my life and I will always strive to keep it this way.I believe so much in you and in us andI love you very much.

LoveBy McKuenLove,Puts the music in laughterthe beauty in songthe warmth in a shoulderthe gentle in strongLove,Puts the magic in memoriesthe sunshine in skiesthe gladness in givingthe starlight in eyes

Love,Puts the fun in togetherthe sadness in apartthe hope in tommorrowthe joy in the heart


I Was Born to Speak Your NameBy Tom ClarkI knew the tuneIt was my songEven before you came alongYet only then did I perceive its meaning

This “you” wished forThis desired Other of whomI spoke so glowingly in poemsI never knew its name

When I lifted its arms upI noticed tiny wingsThat's all I knewThe rest was dreamlikeAnonymous this "you"

So I guess those poemsWere like phone calls to the futureI think I had your numberKnew what I was looking forEven before I found itIn the “face” directory

And luckiest of allYour human substanceWas life's loveliestFar as I could see

As if I'd placedBones and skinTogether in a dreamYou were put together that way

Look to This Day From Sanskrit

Look to this day!For it is life,The very life of life ...For yesterday is only a dream,And tomorrow is only a vision


But today, well lived,Makes every yesterday a dream of happiness,And every tomorrow a vision of hope!

The Greatest of These is LoveAdaptation of the first letter of Paul to the ‘Corinthians

Be ambitious for the higher gifts and I am going to show you a way that is better than any of them. If I have all the eloquence of men or of angels, but speak without love, I am simply a gong booming or a symbol clashing.If I have the gift of prophecy, understanding all the mysteries there are, knowing everything, but am without love, then I am nothing at all.If I give away all that I possess, piece by piece, and if I even let them take my body to burn it, but am without love, it will do me no good whatever. Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous; it is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offence and is not resentful.Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth;It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes.True love does not come to an end.

On Friendship by Roy Croft

I love you, not for what you are, but what I am, when I am with you.I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but what youare making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out.I love you for putting your hand into my heart and passingover all the weak things that you cannot help seeing there,and drawing out into the light all the beautiful and radiant thingsthat no one else has looked quite far enough to find.I love you for ignoring the possibilities of the fool in me, and for laying hold of the possibilities of good in me.I love you for closing your eyes to the discords in me, and addingto the music in me by worshipful listening...You have done it without a touch, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself.

"True Love"

True love is a sacred flamethat burns eternallyand none can dim its special glowor change its destinyTrue love speaks in tender tones


and hears with gentle earTrue love gives with open heartand true love conquers fearTrue love makes no harsh demandsit neither rules nor bindsand true love holds with gentle handsthe hearts that it entwines

adaption of Aristohenes’ speech to Plato at the Symposium.

Whenever a lover has the good fortune to encounter his own actual other half, affection, kinship and love combine together in them, an emotion which is quite overwhelming, and such a pair practically refuses ever to be separated, even for a moment. It is people like these who form lifelong partnerships, and it is more than mere physical enjoyment, which causes them to take such intense delight in the company of each other. If we are to praise the God who confers this benefit upon us, then it is to Love that our praises should be addressed. It is Love who is the author of our wellbeing in this life, by leading us towards what is akin to us. And it is love who gives us the sure hope that if we conduct ourselves well in the sight of heaven, we will hereafter be blessed and happy.

Happiness

Happiness is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created.In the art of marriage, the little things are the big things.It is: never being too old to hold hands;It is remembering to say, “I love you”, at least once a day.It is never going to sleep angry.It is at no time taking the other for granted but making the courtship continuethrough all the years.It is doing things for each other, not out of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.It is demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.It is not expecting the husband to wear the halo,or the wife to have the wings of an angel.It is not looking for perfection but cultivating flexibility, patience, understandingand a sense of humour.It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.That is the art of marriage.


Marriage is a Promise of Love

Marriage is a commitment to life...to the best that two people can find and bring out of each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth no other human relationship can equal, a physical and emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime. Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other’s best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener, and critic.

There may be times when one partner is heartbroken or ailing, and the love of the other may resemble the tender caring of a parent for a child.

Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller, memories are fresher, commitments are stronger, even is felt more strongly, and passes away more quickly. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing love through the seasons of life.

When two people pledge to love and care for each other in marriage, they create a spirit unique to themselves, which binds them closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise, a potential, made in the hearts of two people who love, which takes a lifetime to fulfil.

When You Love SomeoneBy Anne Murrow


When you love someone, you do not love them all the time in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. It is an impossibility and yet this is exactly what most of us demand.

Some people have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships. They leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, as though afraid it will never return. They insist on permanency, on duration, on continuity; when the only continuity possible, in life as in love, is in growth, in fluidity - in freedom, in the sense that the dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in the same pattern.

The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what was in nostalgia, nor forward to what it might be in dread or anticipation, but living in the present relationship and accepting it as it is now. Relationships must be like islands, one must accept them for what they are here and now, within their limits - islands surrounded and interrupted by the sea, and continually visited and abandoned by the tides.


QuotesAn adaption made up from quotes by Helen Keller and Joseph Addisson

A happy marriage has in it all the pleasures of friendshipAll the enjoyment’s of sense and reason and indeed,all the sweets of life, and the most important of all, Love.It’s like a beautiful flower, which I may not touchbut whose fragrance makes the gardena place of delight just the same.

A Blessing

Every day you both live, learn how to love.Take time with each other -Restore each other’s soul with loving words.Receive love with as much understanding as you give it.Find that which is within yourself.Then you can share it with each other.

Do not fear this love and do not fear this marriageBut keep open heart and sincere minds.Be sincerely interested in each other’s happiness.Be constant and consistent in your love.From this, as you know, comes security & strength

Untitled Poem by Michael Leunig, from You and Me, 1995

Once there was a damsel in distress.She had become a bit of a dragon and it was consuming her.

A knight in shining armour confronted the damsel,And seeing her reflection in his shiny breastplate,she realised what a dragon she had becomeand she didn’t like it.

In earnest she set about getting the dragon where it belonged and making sense of it.“You have saved me”, she cried“Take off your armour that I may kiss you in gratitude”.

“The removal of armour requires assistance”, responded the knight.So, together they removed the heavy armour and the damsel embraced him warmly.The knight had never been so warmly touched.

He felt immense relief. He felt lighter; less weary; more free.


“That’s how I feel too!” cried the damsel joyfully,and after some healthy, passionate kissesthey had some healthy, passionate children.

They kept the dragon and the armour, which were useful from time to time;and generally speaking, in their own funny way, they lived quite happily ever after.

The Prayer St. Francis of Assisi 1182-1226

Lord, make us instruments of your peace.Where there is hatred, let us sow love;Where there is injury, pardon;Where there is discord, union;Where there is doubt, faith;Where there is despair, hope;Where there is darkness, light;Where there is sadness, joy;O Divine Master, Grant that we may not so much seekTo be consoled as to console,To be understood as to understand,To be loved as to love.For it is in giving that we receive;It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.Amen

Blessing For A Marriage James Dillet Freeman

May you always need one another, not so much to fill the emptiness as to help each other know your fullness. May you want one another, but not out of lack. May you embrace one another, but not encircle one another. May you succeed in all important ways with each other, and not fail in the little graces. May you have happiness, and may you find it in making one another happy. If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back. May you have love, and may you find it in loving one another.

Marriage Advice Jane Wells 1886

Let your love be stronger than your hate or anger.Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is better to bend a little than to break.Believe the best rather than the worst.People have a way of living up or down to your opinion of them.


Remember that true friendship is the basis for any lasting relationship.The person you choose to marry is deserving of the courtesiesand kindnesses you bestow on your friends.Please hand this down to your children and your children's children.

Never Marry But For Love William Penn 1644-1718

Never marry but for love; but see that thou lovest what is lovely. He that minds a body and not a soul has not the better part of that relationship, and will consequently lack the noblest comfort of a married life.

Between a man and his wife nothing ought to rule but love. As love ought to bring them together, so it is the best way to keep them well together.

A husband and wife that love one another show their children that they should do so too. Others visibly lose their authority in their families by their contempt of one another, and teach their children to be unnatural by their own examples.

Let not enjoyment lessen, but augment, affection; it being the basest of passions to like when we have not, what we slight when we possess.

Here it is we ought to search out our pleasure, where the field is large and full of variety, and of an enduring nature; sickness, poverty or disgrace being not able to shake it because it is not under the moving influences of worldly contingencies.Nothing can be more entire and without reserve; nothing more zealous, affectionate and sincere; nothing more contented than such a couple, nor greater temporal felicity than to be one of them.

Marriage Is A Commitment To Life Source Unknown

Marriage is a commitment to life, the best that two people can find and bring out in each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other relationship can equal. It is a physical and an emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime. Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important


relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener, and critic. And there may come times when one partner is heartbroken or ailing, and the love of the other may resemble the tender caring of a parent for a child.

Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller, memories are fresher, commitment is stronger, even anger is felt more strongly, and passes away more quickly. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing a love that is deeper than life.

When two people pledge their love and care for each other in marriage, they create a spirit unique unto themselves which binds them closer than any spoken or written words. Marriage is a promise, a potential made in the hearts of two people who love each other and takes a lifetime to fulfil.


Fulfilment

I have opened unto you the gates of my being and, like a tide, you have flown into me.The innermost recesses of my spirit are full of you and all the channels of my soul are grown sweet with your presence.

For you have brought me peace.The peace of tranquil waters and the quiet of the summer sea.Your hands are filled with peace as the noon-tide is filled with light.About your head is bound the eternal quiet of the starsand in your heart dwells the calm miracle of twilight.

I am utterly content.In all my being is no ripple of unrestFor I have opened unto you the wide gates of my being.And like a tide you have flowed into me.

"Once in a Lifetime"

When I met you, I had no ideahow much my life was about to be changed ...but then, how could I have known?A love like ours happens once in a lifetime.You were a miracle to me,the one who was everything I had ever dreamed of,the one I thought existed only in my imagination.And when you came into my life,I realised that what I had always thought was happinesscouldn’t compare to the joy that loving you brought to me.You are a part of everything I think, do and feel,and with you by my side,I believe that anything is possible.Thank you for the miracle of you ...You are, and always will be,the love of my life.


On “LOVE”

Real love in marriage is something beyond the warmth and glow, the excitement and romance of being deeply in love. It is caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your marriage as about your own. But real love is not being totally absorbed in each other. It is looking outward in the same direction, together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger so you can reach out and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone.

The beautiful thing about love is that it’s an experience we share with the whole of mankind throughout the world. And yet, to everyone who falls in love, it is the most unique, precious thing in the world. A really happy marriage is founded on love.

Love works in ways that are wondrous and strange.There is nothing in life that love cannot change.Love is unselfish, understanding and kind;Love sees with the heart and not so much with the mind.There can be no stronger bond between husband and wifeTo ensure and secure a happy married life.

Harmonious wedded life is a precious gain to both man and woman, because, as we said before, joys are increased and sorrows diminished by being shared. Marriage increases the scope of responsibility, but it also adds the dimension of love to life, giving it new meaning and new purpose.


TOGETHERBy Peter F. Brown

Someday, when we're old and leathery,Perhaps when we're two hundred and five,Or more antique than that,We'll move to spirit worldAnd take up residence.There will be a white stone castleOn a seaside cliffThat rises from a moor.Facing toward the west,And each day's painting of the sun,It will beckon us to walk through roomsFilled with sunlight.We will live there, with our childrenAnd our children's loved ones,A clan that lives to love othersAnd bring them to our castleOf warmth and heart and love.Art and music and growing thingsWill fill the rooms,Expressing how much we valueThe chance to give and serve and love.Our castle is waiting for us,To live in its walls and dance with the world.It will never change.Its walls will never crumble.My love for you is stronger than our castle.If, on the way to the spirit world,You found that your home was to beA darkened hole of regretful muck,But mine (through a clerical error)Was still the castle,You need not worry.I would live with you in ooze,Cleaning our swamp together,Until our castle welcomed usAnd watched us dance with the world.


5 short Versicles:

1) Today I marry my friend;The one I have laughed with and cried with;The one I have learned from and shared with;The one I have chosen to support, encourage and give myself to,through all the days given us to share,Today I marry the one I love.

2) You are my friends - my familyand all the lovers I have known - You are my wisdom and my warmth, the ecstasy in every high my heart has ever flown - My pupil, my teacher, my eagle and my dove - You are the music and the words to every song my soul has heard -You are my love

3) Our love is strengthened by knowingthat each of us could surviveon our ownIf we wanted to ...but realising that more than anythingWe choose to be together

4) Only once in a lifetime love rushes inChanging you with the tideAnd dawn’s ribbon of light bursts through the darkAwakening you inside.I thought it was all untrueUntil there all at once I knew....When I saw you.

5) I want to love you without clutchingappreciate you without judgingjoin you without invadinginvite you without demanding

Leave you without guiltcriticise you without blamingand help you without insultingIf I can have the same from youthen we can truly meet and enrich each other.


By SIR HUGH WALPOLE

The most wonderful of all things in life is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a growing depth, beauty and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvellous thing; it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of divine accident, and the most wonderful of all things in life.

By TERRI MCPHERSON

Our life together had been built on mutual choices. We had chosen each other as partners, chosen to love, to trust, and to create joy together. The universe may very well have had a hand in bringing us together; what we did beyond that point was of our own choosing.That tiny flash of time left me forever changed. I realised that somewhere among the pages of our history, rich in passages of shared memories, we had chosen to become soul mates.

Kahlil Gibran on “Love and Desire”

Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself. But if you love, and must have desires, let these be your desires:

To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.To know the pain of too much tenderness.To be wounded by your own understanding of love - And to bleed willingly and joyfully.To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving.To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;To return home at eventide with gratitude.And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart & a song of praise upon your lips.


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