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Leaning in – to Make Peace Katherine ToddMicah 6:6-8 Forest Hill Presbyterian ChurchMatthew 18:10-20 September 6, 2017

In examining what this scripture verse does and does not say, I find this to be a very helpful

verse for life. Life is full of conflict, one with another. We do not all agree on things. I believe it

is ultimately a blessing that we each bring our own unique perspectives and experiences. Truly

when we come together and seek to understand the breadth of human experience and

perspective, we are far more equipped to unify people around real and lasting solutions for

many of our challenges. But this diversity of thought and experiences, of values and needs

most often presents as conflict between us. And what we learn from scriptures like these is

that how we respond in these situations matters.

Last week, Paul instructed us through Romans to “be at peace with all, insofar as it depends on

you.” But this is hard. Peace is not something passive that creeps up on us when we really still.

Peace is not gained by polite society or simply hiding your thoughts and feelings. It is not

something that’s gained simply by luck or even mere prayer. Peacemaking is an active process.

It is the fruition of many things coming together: of respect, of mercy, of compassion, of

justice… And scriptures like we read today give us a pattern for how to be at peace with

everyone, insofar as it depends on us.

And this pattern has some themes:

Respect – we are to show respect, even to the person who has wronged us. Their wrong does

not justify another wrong by us. Rather, we are to treat them with the respect and honor God

has shown us.

Being Direct – Respect is most profoundly shown in this command to be direct. Notice the

scripture does not say, “Go and talk about the matter with everyone except the offender.”

Neither does not say, “Ambush, publicly shame, ostracize, marginalize, and oppress the

offender.”

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No, we are instructed to be a people who show the respect of being direct.

I have found in life that there are times when I need to talk something through in order to get

my thoughts organized so that I can talk with the person directly. I think for folks who verbally

process their thoughts, this may be necessary, but if we need to first talk with someone else we

need to choose our confidants wisely, and we are to let this be simply a step in the process, not

the end goal. When we talk with the person, we are to do so directly, without public shaming

or condemnation. We are to approach the person alone first, giving them the chance to hear

and make a change, without publicly penalizing the person.

Only IF the person refuses to listen are we then to bring in two or three witnesses. Still keeping

the matter close, without public humiliation, we are to try addressing the matter with the

person in the presence of witnesses. Who knows, perhaps the voices of several will change a

heart and wake the person up to the issue.

But if the person will not listen even to the witnesses, then the matter is to be brought to the

church.

Now, I must say here, that this last step feels very public. But perhaps this step shows the

seriousness of the matter. Perhaps it acknowledges that the matter is not a small or irrelevant

thing. Our internal disputes within the church, affect the whole church. And instead of turning

a blind eye to the issue, letting it begin to rot us from the inside like a virus, or talking about it

with everyone except the person who hurt us, Christ is instructing us to continue being direct

with the person.

Then, if we still cannot be reconciled, we are to wipe our hands of the matter and let it go.

Indeed God still cares for that one, as for the lost sheep, but we allow the person the right to

disagree and live the consequences of unresolved sin.

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Thanks be to God for the ways we continue to learn from and build on the experiences of our

ancestors. Many have long learned to “suck it up.” We have old adages, “Life is hard. Deal

with it.” These instructions indeed hold a measure of wisdom and truth. Life is hard!

Sometimes we need to simply accept and deal with the problems as they present themselves.

But there is more we need. We also need to be about the work of doing justice. Scripture says,

“Do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with God.” We are not to simply love mercy or simply

do justice. We are commanded to do both. These opposites – of showing mercy and doing

justice are to be held in tension, in conversation. We are to do justice, while loving mercy.

So what does that look like here?

Perhaps we are to hold the offender accountable while letting the punishment be designed to

reconcile that person to right and just living. In the scripture just prior we read about God

seeking out the one lost sheep and how much joy God takes in that one – that one lost sheep.

In the face of injustice, God’s heart is for healing, wholeness, and reconciliation. God’s heart is

for each one, even and possibly especially the offenders. Whatever consequence or

punishment is done, it is to be done in order that the offending person might come to

repentance and make things right! Justice is not a code word for revenge. Justice in God’s

world is meant to bring reconciliation – between us and another, between us and the world,

and between us and God.

And for the victim of the wrong done, doing justice is the first step of healing. When we are

victimized, it is tragically easy to believe that the injustice was our fault. Many times we

internalize the trauma and reason backwards that we must have done something wrong in

order for this to happen to us. We may think there is something innately wrong with us. This is

tragically why so many victims of abuse will develop such low self-esteems, that then in turn

keeps us returning to those abusive relationships that seem to confirm the sub-standard view

we hold of ourselves. So the abused, continue to allow themselves to be abused, and may even

begin the cycle of victimizing themselves with negative and condemning self-talk.

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What a tragedy - the evil that can spin out of sin. When we sin, we separate ourselves from

God and one another. We dehumanize ourselves, doing violence to ourselves. And when we

are the victim of sin, we quite often further do violence to ourselves when we internalize the

trauma.

All around, sin needs to be addressed. Burying our heads in the sand, ignoring the issue, talking

with everyone but the offender, DOES NOT bring healing. Running from the issue, leaning away

from the trouble, does not bring peace. The perpetrator of sin is no more brought to

accountability and given the chance to make things right, and the victim is no more shown that

their life matters and that what happened was wrong, if we avoid the issue.

Rather Christ teaches us to lean in. To lean in to the discomfort. To lean in to the offense, and

to be direct in addressing the sin.

We are to called to lean in, to show respect, to be direct,….

So that what is wrong can be made right

So that what is out of joint can be made whole

So that what is diseased may be healed.

We do not heal a wound by covering it up and pretending it does not exist. We heal a wound

by facing it head on, first at home with our first aid kits, then perhaps with a friend or parent to

help us clean the wound, and if that’s not enough we may need to head to the Doctor. And if

that’s still not enough, we employ the help of a whole hospital…

Healing and reconciliation. Being at peace. It is all a product of leaning into the situation –

facing it head on.

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And let me draw your attention to another point. In this pattern of conflict resolution, we are

not told to do this whenever we believe someone has sinned but when someone has sinned

against us.

We have all known folks who think it their responsibility to correct others. Perhaps this has

been us, at different points of our lives, or in different roles we’ve had. But correcting others of

their sins never goes so well. Remember Christ’s words on this matter from earlier in Matthew

(chapter 7):

7 “Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. 2 For with the judgment you make you

will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. 3 Why do you see

the speck in your neighbor’s[a]eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? 4 Or how

can you say to your neighbor,[b] ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is

in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you

will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s[c]eye.

No, we are not in a position to judge or condemn. Christ says that when we mis-judge, we will

also be misjudged. Judging is not our business. We are not equipped to correct the sin in one

another’s lives, because each of us is so mired in our own sins. Our very vision is cloudy and

judgment skewed. We can try to correctly discern the will of God, but in the end, we are not

God. We will not fully see, until we are face to face with our Lord.

So in this meantime, it is not our job to correct everyone else. We are rather to be concerned

about our own sins. We lean into the darkness of our own selves and seek to make things right.

And where we are called to confront and lean in with others, following this pattern given to us

in scripture, is when someone has sinned “against us.” When there are now wedges between

us and others, when an injustice has occurred, when we have been wronged, we are to speak

up and give voice to wrong. We are to be direct, showing respect to the offender. We are to

do so quietly at first, allowing the person to change, without public scrutiny, and only if that

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does not work do we confront that one, first with 2 or 3 witnesses, and only if that does not

work then before the church.

Notice God’s heart. Notice God’s heart that each one will be saved. Notice God’s heart that we

live peaceably with one another. Notice God’s heart that we do justice, love mercy, and walk

humbly with God.

No one of us is perfect. None of us stand before God, but by Christ’s loving sacrifice.

We all are in need of justice and mercy.

May we become doers of justice

May we love mercy

And may we each remember that God is God, and we are not.

God, let your justice roll down like the mighty waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing

stream!