INTRODUCTION

Did you know that Mario has a whole different life that you

don’t know about? It’s his life in school!

Yes, Mario goes to school. And the best part is that Mario

always knows the right thing to do!!

You can learn from Mario. Come along with us and read

Mario’s Social Stories. As you read each story, think about what Mario says and does.

Think about how you can do what Mario does!

If you have questions about how Mario thinks and acts, you can ask

your teacher or helper. Soon, you’ll be just like Mario!!

HOME IS DIFFERENT FROM SCHOOL

Mario knows that when he’s home, he behaves differently than he does at

school.

When Mario says silly things at home, his parents might laugh. But if he

says those same silly things in school, he might get into trouble. That same thing

happens to me sometimes. I don’t understand why my teachers get angry with my silly

blurts, but my parents laugh.

Mario tells me that’s because the expectations at home are often different

from those at school. At school I need to “think about you” more than I do at home

because there are so many people to think about!! My silly comments could make

students feel uncomfortable. My silly comments could make my teachers feel

uncomfortable. And they could make the principal uncomfortable.

My parents know me very well. They love me, no matter what I do. But other

students and my teacher don’t know me that well. And, truthfully, they don’t love me

like my parents do! So I have to act differently at school and pay attention to my

expected behaviors. That will make other students and my teachers comfortable.

That’s what Mario does. And I will do that too.

COMING INTO SCHOOL

When I come into school each day, I have routines to follow. Mario knows how to

follow routines. I am learning that too. When Mario goes into his classroom, he

does the following:

Mario enters the classroom quietly. He unpacks his backpack, hangs it and

his coat up, puts his homework in the bin and places his books in his desk.

Mario immediately checks the board to look at the day’s schedule

Then Mario immediately begins his morning edit or other

classwork that is assigned.

Here’s what Mario DOESN’T do!

He does not immediately go to the teacher to tell him or her

what happened last night, or this morning or on the way to

school. He only goes to talk to the teacher if it’s an emergency!

He does not go to the teacher to show him or her an item that interests him

He does not wander around the room and talk with other students

He does not call out silly comments

I can learn to do what Mario does. I can enter my classroom quietly, unpack my

backpack, hang it and my coat up, put my homework in the bin and place my books

in my desk. I can check the schedule then start my morning edit. I can do these

because I can do what Mario does. This will make Mario happy, my teacher will

have comfortable thoughts about me, and I will feel happy.

EXPECTED BEHAVIORS

Mario knows the difference between expected and unexpected behaviors.

Mario also knows that expected and unexpected behaviors can change depending

where he is. For example, something that might be expected and okay to do at home,

might be unexpected, or not okay to do, at school!

Expected behaviors are things I do that make me feel good about myself and

other people happy. When other people are happy, they feel comfortable

when they are with me. They treat me nicely, say kind words to me and

want me to play with them! My teacher may tell me how pleased she or he

is. My expected behaviors give Mario comfortable feelings about me. That makes me

feel calm and good about myself.

Unexpected behaviors are things that I do that make other people

unhappy. When other people are unhappy, they have uncomfortable feelings

about me. When other people have uncomfortable feelings about me, they may

tell me to go away, say unkind things to me, or tell an adult about what I’ve done. My

teacher or the principal may scold me. Mario would be unhappy. That would make me

feel anxious, unhappy, or uncomfortable.

I want to do what’s expected of me. Mario wants me to do what is expected of

him. If I do what’s expected, like Mario does, I will be happy and everyone else will feel

comfortable around me.

GETTING STUCK

Getting stuck means to think about one thing and not let out of

your mind. Sometimes I get stuck when I think about Mario!

Sometimes I get stuck when I have a question that I can’t get answered!

Sometimes I get stuck when I want to tell someone something and that

person won’t listen. Sometimes I get stuck when I want to keep talking

about something and no one wants to listen!

Everyone gets stuck sometimes. But Mario knows how to get

“unstuck.” Mario has a pretend filing cabinet in his brain. When he gets “stuck” on a

thought, he opens the filing cabinet and puts the thought inside. Then he closes the

drawer. Once his thought is closed inside the filing cabinet, Mario can then think about

something else.

Sometimes Mario writes his thought down on paper. Then he takes his

paper and rips it up, or crumples it up and throws it away. When he throws the paper

away, the thought goes away with it and he gets “unstuck.”

Sometimes Mario thinks he can say five things about his topic

to himself. Then he counts the things on his fingers. When he’s said

it five times, poof, it’s over and he’s unstuck.

Sometimes Mario gets stuck on something that he has to tell someone. If it is

really important, and the teacher isn’t in the middle of a lesson, he raises his hand and

asks the teacher if he can tell her something, so he can get unstuck. If the teacher says

yes, he tells her just three short sentences about his thought. Then, poof, the thought

is gone.

Helping yourself get unstuck is an important skill. Mario knows how to get

unstuck, and now I do too.

BEING PART OF THE GROUP

When I am part of a group, I might think that no-one is paying attention to me. I

might feel “invisible.” But I’m not. Mario knows that people are always paying

attention to what we’re doing, even when we’re in a large group.

If I’m in a group and burp real loud, other people know it. They might not like

me if I burp real loud in a group. If I do that, I’m only thinking about myself. Instead of

thinking about the group, I think, “I have to burp.” So I burp.

But when I’m with other people I have to think about their feelings. If I burp real

loud, other people might think that I’m rude. They might not like to be around me.

When I’m with a group, I have to think about the people in the group. I have to

pay attention to others in the group. I have to talk about what they want to talk

about. I have to do the kinds of things they want to do.

When I’m part of the group, I show I’m part of the group by showing whole

body listening. If I’m part of a group and start talking about Mario when they’re talking

about the life cycle of a plant, my mouth isn’t part of the group. If the group is listening

to someone talk, and I start looking around the room, my eyes aren’t part of the group.

If they’re talking about the plant life cycles and I’m thinking about video games, my

brain isn’t part of the group. If they’re talking about plant life cycles and I’m listening to

the heater, my ears aren’t part of the group.

When I’m part of a group, I have to make sure that my eyes, ears, hands, feet,

brain are all part of the group. If I do, the other people in the group will be comfortable

with me.

STANDING IN LINE

Mario knows that teachers in school expect him to stand in line

sometimes. When he stands in line, he knows exactly what to do!

First, Mario lines up an arm’s distance away from the person in

front of him. He stands still, making sure he doesn’t fidget. He doesn’t talk unless

the teacher says it’s ok. If he does talk, he whispers. When it’s time to move, he

walks quietly with the group. When he walks, he stays an arm’s length away from the

person in front and behind him.

I am going to stand in line just like Mario does. I can do what’s expected of me

when I walk in line. If I do what’s expected, my teacher might praise me. What I do will

make her feel comfortable with me. That will make Mario happy. And that will make

me happy too.

PARTICIPATING IN CLASS

Mario knows how to participate in class and now I do too!

When he’s in class, Mario listens very hard to what others are saying

about the topic being discussed. When Mario makes comments he

makes sure they are on the same topic. When Mario asks questions, he

makes sure they are about the same topic.

When Mario makes comments, he makes sure he doesn’t talk too long. He

limits his comments to only three sentences!

Mario also uses his brain filter. If someone says something he doesn’t

agree with, he can keep his thoughts in his thought bubble. If he really

wants to make a comment, he can say the following:

I think your comment is interesting

But I disagree

I think…..

then he talks about his idea.

Mario does not say things like, “You’re wrong,” or “I have a better idea, “

because that might make others feel uncomfortable or sad. He talks only about the

topic everyone else is talking about, and he keeps his comments short – three sentences

only!

I can keep my comments on topic, say only three sentences, disagree in a kind

manner and participate in class so that everyone feels comfortable. That makes

Mario comfortable. And that makes me happy!

Unexpected Free Time in Class

When Mario has unexpected free time in class, he knows exactly what to do.

Mario listens to his teacher. She may give him choices of what to do. She may

tell him to take work from the free-time basket or read, or work on homework.

Here’s what Mario does not do: He doesn’t make sounds or fidget or walk

around the classroom. That distracts others and makes his teacher unhappy.

When it’s time for the next lesson, Mario puts his work away immediately and

listens to the teacher. He also follows his teacher’s directions. That makes his teacher

happy. When his teacher is happy, Mario feels calm and comfortable.

I can do what’s expected during unexpected free time. I can do that because I

like doing what Mario does.

BEING A SOCIAL DETECTIVE

Do you know what detectives do? Mario does. Detectives look

for clues to solve a mystery.

Sometimes people are a mystery. Sometimes I have trouble

figuring out what other people are thinking. Sometimes I have trouble

figuring out how other people are feeling. Sometimes I have trouble

figuring out that things I do can change the way other people feel.

Being a social detective means that I have to really watch other people and find

clues to figure out how they’re thinking, feeling, or what they’re planning to do.

For instance, if a person looks like this I can look for clues to

make a smart guess about what’s happening. The boy’s face is all

scrunched up, so I know he’s uncomfortable. His shoulders are also

shaking. My smart guess is that he’s scared. If I could hear him, he might be going

“ohh!” which would be another clue that he’s scared. If I could hear him and he was

saying “brrr,” then my smart guess would be that he’s cold.

Being a social detective is hard work. I have to look, listen and make smart

guesses about other people. Mario knows how to do that, and I’m learning how to do it

too.

THINKING ABOUT YOU, THINKING ABOUT ME

People think about themselves all the time. When they’re

eating, they may think about whether they’re enjoying their food.

When they’re reading, they may think that they’re enjoying the book.

When they watch television or play video games, they may think about

how much they like what they’re doing.

But when people are around others, they shouldn’t be thinking about

themselves! They should be thinking about the other people in the group.

The natural next question is, “Why?”

Well, Mario knows that when he thinks about others, they feel comfortable

around him. Thinking about others means you know that your behavior can change

how others feel. If Mario says something hurtful to someone (which he wouldn’t do,

would he?) he could make that person unhappy or uncomfortable. If that person is

uncomfortable with Mario’s words, he might not want to play with Mario any more.

If Mario is thinking of himself when he’s with others, that means he’s only

interested in what he wants to do, what he’s saying, or what he’s thinking. When he’s

thinking about others, he is interested in what they are doing, what they’re saying and

what they’re thinking.

If Mario is thinking about others, he will listen to what they’re saying and might

ask a couple questions to learn more. If he’s thinking about others, he might decide to

play a game they want to play. If he’s thinking about others, he knows that his words

can make them happy or sad, comfortable or uncomfortable.

Mario thinks about others when he’s in a group. It’s okay to “think about me,”

or think about yourself, when you’re all alone. But when you’re in a group, Mario knows

it’s important to “think about you,” or, think about others.

WHAT IS UNCOMFORTABLE?

I know that when I do something unexpected, that makes others

uncomfortable. But what is uncomfortable?

When I sit in a silly way on a chair, I can feel

uncomfortable.

If my clothes are too tight, that can be uncomfortable.

If it’s 90° out, I can be uncomfortable. Mario and I don’t like

feeling uncomfortable.

Sometimes, people can feel uncomfortable when they’re with other people.

If I tell someone I don’t like his or her shirt, that could make him or her

uncomfortable. If I tell someone his or her hair looks messy, that could make him or her

feel uncomfortable. If I call out during class and don’t give others a chance to talk,

that can make them feel uncomfortable. (It will probably make the teacher

uncomfortable too.) If I cry if I lose a game, I might make other people feel

uncomfortable. If I talk only about things I want to talk about, I might make others feel

uncomfortable. If I play only things I want to play, I might make other people feel

uncomfortable.

Uncomfortable is a weird feeling that people don’t like. Mario doesn’t like

feeling uncomfortable, and neither do I.

If I do things that make other people uncomfortable, they may not like me. They

may not ask me to play with them. They may not want me to be in their group. They

may tell me to be quiet or go away. My teacher may scold me.

I will do expected behaviors. When I do expected behaviors, other people feel

comfortable!!! That will make Mario happy, and it will make me happy too!

PERSONAL SPACE

When I’m with other people, I respect their personal space.

Mario respects personal space too. Personal space means that you

leave at least one arm’s length of space between you and the other

person. Not respecting personal space means that you are a “space

invader!” You are invading others’ personal space.

We all need personal space. If someone puts his or her face right up close to

mine, or to Mario’s, we get uncomfortable. And, I would make other people

uncomfortable if I put my face right up close to theirs.

When I’m walking with people, I leave at least one arm’s length of space

between us. If I bump into them when I walk with them, I’m being a space invader

and not respecting their personal space.

If my papers, binders and books get all over the student’s

desk next to me, I’m being a space invader and not respecting his or

her personal space. If I sit so close that I’m bumping the student

next to me in an assembly, I’m being a space invader and not

respecting his or her personal space.

Mario always respects others’ personal space. I can do that

to. Respecting personal space is expected behavior. I like doing

what’s expected. That makes Mario and others happy and that

makes me happy too.

WHOLE BODY LISTENING

When Mario is in his classroom, he knows exactly what to do! He shows whole body

listening! That means that he:

Listens with his eyes. That means he looks at who is speaking and watches

his or her face and body to make good guesses about what he or she is

thinking, or how he or she is reacting to me.

Listens with his mouth, which is closed and quiet. That means he’s not

talking, humming or making other sounds when others are talking. It also

means that when he talks, he makes comments only on the subject being

talked about by the group

Listens with his hands held quietly on his lap, on his desk, quietly taking

notes or down by his side

Listening with his feet standing still or feet quietly on the floor

Listening with his brain. He thinks about what the speaker is saying and

what others are doing that will help him make guesses about their thoughts

and actions

Listening with his heart, showing that he cares what the speaker is saying

Mario shows whole body listening. If Mario shows whole body listening, so can I.

If I show whole body listening, that will make Mario happy. My teacher may praise me,

and I will feel calm and comfortable with myself.

Working By Myself

Mario knows how to use expected behaviors when he works by himself in class.

I can learn the same things!!

When Mario is given work to do, he stays calm and does it, even if he doesn’t

like it. Sometimes he thinks it’s boring to do. But he does the work anyway, because he

knows that’s expected.

If Mario gets “stuck” in his work, he goes to another part of the assignment and

does that first. Then he comes back to the more difficult part. If he’s still “stuck” he

raises his hand and asks an adult for help.

When Mario is finished his work, he reads quietly, or does homework or other

activities that the teacher has told him to do.

I can learn how to work by myself and do what Mario does. That will make

Mario happy, my teacher happy and it will make me feel calm and comfortable.

WORKING IN A SMALL GROUP

Sometimes I am expected to do my work with a few other students. This is

called working with a small group. When I work with a small group, I do what Mario

does.

Mario participates by staying on topic and talking about what the group is

talking about. If I want to talk, I stay on topic and only say 3 sentences at a time. In

that way, I make sure others have a chance to speak too.

If I don’t like what others are saying, I keep my hurtful thoughts in my thought

bubble. If I have a different idea, I can tell it to others. But I can’t say their ideas

“stink” or that my idea is “better.” That would make others feel sad and

uncomfortable around me.

If I’m bored, I play the “social fake.” I keep my head up and look at the person

who is speaking. I make sure my body is part of the group. That will make all members

of the group comfortable with me.

I like following Mario’s rules for working with a small group. When my teacher

sees me using expected behaviors in a small group, she may praise me. That will make

me happy. And Mario will cheer me on, saying “hooray!”

SHOWING RESPECT

Respect is being careful and thinking about other’s feelings. Mario shows respect

by using kind words and actions. And I can too. Respect makes everyone feel welcome,

comfortable and safe.

Sometimes, I say and do things that I don’t realize can be hurtful. These hurtful

things do not show respect. If I tell someone his or her hair looks funny, or use their

name in silly ways, that does not show respect.

What is respect, then? Here are some examples that Mario uses:

Respect is using kind words and actions. It is saying “please” and “thank you.”

It is waiting for your turn to speak and not “bumping” words or “blurting.”

Respect is listening to other people. Even if I say “please” sometimes, people

don’t want to do what I ask. Respect is accepting that and walking away or

moving to another subject.

Respect mean to use a calm tone of voice. If I whine, or my voice sounds angry, that

is not respect.

Respect might be carefully helping another student. If someone drops something on

the floor, I might pick it up and give it back to the person, saying “I think you

dropped this.”

Respect is sharing

Respect is keeping your books and papers on your own desk and

not being a “space invader.”

Respect is giving others’ their “personal space.”

Respect is working quietly when others are trying to think

When Mario is in school, he always shows respect. Respect is being careful and

thoughtful with other people. Respect helps everyone feel welcome, comfortable and

safe. ** Taken from The New Social Story

Book, by Carol Gray©

Talking to the Teacher with Respect **

I can learn from Mario how to talk to my teacher with respect. When Mario is in

school, he talks to the teacher with respect. Mario always uses a calm voice and kind

words. Mario doesn’t interrupt her when she’s talking. Most of all, Mario doesn’t call

out silly words when she’s teaching.

I usually talk to my teacher with respect, just like Mario. But sometimes, I

feel frustrated or angry. These feelings are uncomfortable. When I feel that way, I

forget to talk to teachers with respect. Sometimes I’m feeling silly. When I do, I

forget to talk with teachers with respect.

Mario wouldn’t like that!

When I don’t talk to my teacher with respect, she gets angry or frustrated. She

might say angry words to me in front of my friends. That can

embarrass me and make me feel uncomfortable. But if I talk to my

teacher with respect, she might tell me how nice I am, and that will

make me feel happy.

Mario likes it when I talk to my teacher with respect.

I’m going to learn from Mario It’s important to talk to my teacher with respect

even when I have uncomfortable feelings or am feeling silly.

MY TEACHER IS NOT HERE!

My teacher’s name is _______. Most school days, _________ teaches my class.

Sometimes, _____ has to be somewhere else.

Mario knows that teachers get sick. ________ may be sick. ________may

need to stay home.

Mario also knows that teachers go to teacher workshops.

________ may be at a workshop, learning new things.

Many teachers have children and they get sick or have doctor’s

appointments. One of _______ children could be sick or have to go to the

doctor’s.

We have a substitute teacher when ________ is sick. That is okay.

When my regular teacher is not here, I can make good choices and show

expected behaviors, just like Mario. Mario and I know that _________ will return to

class as soon as ____can.

We Have a Substitute Teacher!

Today my class has a substitute teacher. This means my teacher is not here

today.

On a substitute teacher day, Mario would show his every-day expected

behaviors. He would stay in his seat, avoid making ‘blurts,’ raise his hand, use

kind words, keep his hands and feet to himself, work quietly and follow the

classroom rules.

Some students may act differently, however. They may think that because our

regular teacher isn’t here, they can do what’s “unexpected.” Some might

wander around the room, blurt out comments, act silly and disrupt the

lesson. These are not good choices.

When I have a substitute teacher, I can make good choices, just like Mario

does. I can do what’s expected even though my regular teacher

isn’t here. I can still earn my points! That will make both my

substitute and regular teacher happy. Mario would be happy too.

When they’re happy, I feel proud.

VISITING THE BATHROOM

When Mario has to go to the bathroom, he knows what to do.

First he raises his hand and waits for the teacher to call on him. Then he asks her if he

can use the bathroom.

When she says “yes,” he stands up, pushes in his chair and walks quietly to the

bathroom. He closes the bathroom door quietly once he’s entered.

After he uses the toilet, he washes his hands using soap and water. Then he

dries his hands with paper towels. Then he returns to his seat quietly. Those are

expected behaviors.

Mario also knows there are things that he should not do. He should not run to

the bathroom. He should not announce to others that he has to “wee,” or “pee.” He

should not make any comments to others about going to the bathroom. He should

not leave the bathroom door open. He should not wipe his hands on

his clothes. These are unexpected behaviors.

Mario knows exactly what to do when he has to go to the

bathroom. He uses expected behaviors.

These are the same things that I can do. I like doing expected

behaviors. My teacher may praise me, and that will make me happy.

EATING IN THE SCHOOL CAFETERIA

When Mario eats in the school cafeteria, he shows expected behaviors. I can do

the same thing.

I line up quietly and walk with others in my class to the cafeteria. I wait quietly

in line to get my food. Once I get my food, I walk quietly to my table. I sit an arm’s

length away from others at my table. When I find my place at my table, I sit with

others I know. I don’t sit with people who are mean to me. If someone tells me tell me

to do things that everyone else laughs at, he’s not being my friend and I don’t sit with

him.

When I eat my lunch, I chew with my mouth closed.

During lunch I talk with students sitting around me. I talk about things they

want to talk about. Sometimes I can talk about things I want to talk about. But I only

say three sentences at a time. Then I pause and let others continue the conversation.

If others don’t want to talk about my interest, I stop talking about it. These are

expected behaviors.

Here’s what I don’t do: I don’t push, fight, fidget or cut in line. I don’t run or act

silly. I don’t sit with people I don’t know. I don’t play with my food or drink. I don’t talk

only about my own interests. And I don’t tell others how they should behave. These are

unexpected behaviors.

Mario uses only expected behaviors in the cafeteria. I want to be like Mario. So

I’ll use expected behaviors too. That will make everyone happy!

PLAYING WITH OTHERS

Mario knows how important it is to be able to play with others. He knows that if

he plays nicely with others, they will want him to be part of their group. Here’s how

Mario plays with others:

He thinks about the people he wants to play with and chooses

people who are nice to him. When he finds them, he looks to make sure

the activity isn’t full and there’s room for him to participate. He looks at

their bodies and their faces. If they look back at him and smile, he makes

a guess that they’d like him to play with them.

Mario uses his eyes and body to show others he’d like to be part of their

group. He walks up to them, keeping his body one arm’s length away from them.

He turns his shoulders toward them and asks if he can play with them.

He watches what others in the group are doing, to decide what he should be

doing. He is flexible, asking questions about the rules if he doesn’t know how to play.

He uses positive, expected comments. He is a good sport, saying “good game” to

the winners. He doesn’t cry or get upset if his team loses the game. After all, it’s just a

game!

I can do what Mario does when he plays with others. He uses

expected behaviors and I will too.

RECESS

When I’m at recess, I’ll do what Mario does. Mario lines up quietly with his class

and walks to the playground. When he gets to the playground, he chooses the activity

he wants to do.

If he wants to play with others, he uses his eyes, brain and body to observe

what they’re doing. I then he asks if he can join in their activities. If they say yes,

he watches with his eyes, brain and body, to show them he’s thinking about them.

He doesn’t beg them to do what he wants to do.

Sometimes Mario’s friends don’t want to do what he wants to do. That’s ok. It

doesn’t mean they don’t like him. It just means they want to do something different!

If people want to do what Mario is doing, he talks kindly to them. He doesn’t

insist they follow his rules.

Mario never hits, kicks or screams at others. If he loses a game, he doesn’t cry.

Mario does what is expected on the playground.

I can do what’s expected on the playground too. I do exactly what Mario does

on the playground. That will make him feel happy, the recess aides happy and that will

make me happy.

TELLING THE TRUTH

Mario tells me I should always tell the truth. Telling the truth is

important. Telling the truth means to tell the facts, exactly as I know

them.

Sometimes it’s scary to tell the truth. If I do something

that makes others feel uncomfortable, they may tell my teacher or

the principal. If an adult then asks me if I did that, I might want to give a bold-

faced lie and say I didn’t. Or, I might change the “facts” because I think that I won’t get

into trouble.

It’s not good to give a bold-faced lie or change the facts so I don’t get into

trouble. Usually adults will learn the truth. Then they will be even angrier with me.

If I tell the truth as soon as I’m asked, my teacher, principal and other adults will

feel more comfortable about me. They still may scold me for making others feel

uncomfortable, but they will know that I tell the truth. That is a good thing.

Mario tells the truth. I can tell the truth too. When I tell the truth, it makes

Mario happy, and my teacher and principal happy. When they’re happy, I’m happy too.

THE SOCIAL FAKE

Everyone tells me I have to tell the truth. Mario says I have to

tell the truth. But sometimes, the truth hurts other people or makes

them feel uncomfortable. That’s where the “social fake” comes in. Mario uses the

“social fake” and so can I.

If I put my head down on my desk because I’m bored with what the teacher

is saying, that will make my teacher uncomfortable. She or he might tell me to put

my head up. That’s where the “social fake” comes in. If I’m bored, I should look at

the teacher, smile a little; maybe nod my head a little. In short, I’m pretending that

I’m paying attention. I can do that for a few minutes, then I have to go back and REALLY

pay attention! That’s what the “social fake” is all about. We’re pretending, so we don’t

make other people uncomfortable.

If someone asks me if I like his shirt, I might use the “social fake.” Instead

of saying “no” and making the person uncomfortable, I can use the “social fake”

and say, “it is a nice color of blue!” When we use the “social fake” we look for

something nice to say!

If someone asks me if I like his haircut, I might use the social fake and say,

“it’s really short!” or “it’s great for summer.”

I don’t always have to use the “social fake.” If someone wants me to play a

game and I don’t want to, I don’t have to say “sure.” But I do have to make sure I’m

polite. I can say, “no thank you. Maybe some other time.”

The “social fake” works when telling the truth will hurt other people’s feelings. It

should NEVER be used to cover up what I’m doing. The Social Fake is different from

lying! Mario knows when to use the “social fake,” and when not to. I am learning that

too.

WHITE LIES

I know it is best to tell the truth. The truth means describing the

facts exactly as I know them.

Sometimes I might state information that is not the total truth, but I can say it

because it might protect how other people feel. Walking up and telling someone I don’t

like the way they smell would be the truth. But that would also hurt their feelings. I

can keep that thought in my thought bubble. Or, if the person asks if I like her new

perfume, I can say something like, “it’s a different kind of smell,” or “I’ve never

smelled anything like it before!”

I should never change the facts of a situation to protect myself from getting

into trouble. If I do, that’s bold-faced lying. And bold-faced lying is unexpected

behavior.

Mario knows the difference between the truth and white lies. (White lies are

sometimes like the ‘social fake.’) Mario uses both of them to

keep from hurting other peoples’ feelings. But Mario always

describes the facts, as he knows them. I do too.

BOLD-FACED LIES

Mario always tells the truth. He knows that telling the truth means describing

what you believe to be the facts, exactly as you know them.

Bold-faced lies are wrong. Bold-faced lies occur when people state

information that they know is false. Usually people tell bold-faced lies in order to

protect themselves from others becoming angry or disappointed with them.

Sometimes bold-faced lies get other, innocent people into trouble. Sometimes people

tell bold-faced lies about themselves to make themselves look important, or because

they think other people will like them more.

Bold-faced lies are never acceptable or expected behaviors. Mario does not tell

bold-faced lies. I don’t want to tell bold-faced lies either.

I want the adults and students in my life to feel comfortable around me. If I

tell bold-faced lies, they won’t want to be near me. My teachers and the principal

won’t like it. Other kids might not want me to play with them, or be in their

group.

Bold-faced lies hurt people. If I tell a bold-faced lie about someone else, it

will hurt his or her feelings. If I deny that I did something – a bold-faced lie – I will

hurt myself because people won’t trust me. And if I tell bold-faced lies about myself –

telling someone that I did something exciting that I didn’t really do, people won’t trust

me.

Mario likes it when I tell the truth. So do I.

FIRE DRILLS

Sometimes fire drills scare Mario. He doesn’t like the noise of

the fire alarm. He doesn’t like the crowds of people. He doesn’t like

everyone moving together to one place. Fire drills scare him!

Sometimes I feel the same way.

Mario has learned what to do in fire drills. I can do the same

thing. He can be calm about fire drills, because he knows they are just practice. It’s

important to learn what we should do, so if there ever is a fire, we’ll be ready!

When the bell rings, I leave my seat, push in my chair and walk quietly to

the classroom door. If I have fire drill buddies, I line up behind one of them and in

front of the other. If the alarm hurts my ears, I can put my hands over my ears and

stand quietly, waiting for the line to move. I must stand quietly, because I have to

be able to hear my teachers’ directions. So I don’t hum loudly or scream “this hurts

my ears.”

When people in front of me start to walk out of the classroom, I stay in line and

walk quietly with the group. We walk to the special place outside that

is set aside just for my classroom. I know there are lots of people

crowding all around me and that makes me uncomfortable. But I can

tell myself “this won’t last long. I can walk with the group until I get to

my fire-drill line.” I stand in line quietly until my teacher tells me to return to my

classroom. If I have a question, I can raise my hand and wait for the teacher to come to

me. She may take a few minutes because teachers have to take attendance at fire drills

and give them to the people from the office.

I walk quietly back to my classroom. When I sit back down in my seat, I can talk

again if my teacher says it’s ok.

These are the expected behaviors that Mario follows. I can follow them too.

LATE ARRIVAL

Sometimes Mario’s school opens late. Usually this happens in

the winter, when there’s snow or ice on the roads. Mario knows what

is expected of him when school opens late. I can do the same thing

Mario does, because I like doing what’s expected.

When Mario has a late arrival, he enters the classroom quietly

and immediately unpacks his backpack. He hangs up his backpack and his coat and goes

to his seat. On regular days, Mario goes quietly to his desk. On late arrival

days, most of the other kids in Mario’s classroom are excited about the snow

or ice. They may tell other kids or their teacher about how the snow or ice

looked at their home. I can comment about that too. But I know that I still

have to do my morning work. So I will make only one or two comments, then get to

work!

When I’m ready to work, I sit down and look at the board. My teacher will have

written our new schedule on the board. If I have any questions about the schedule, I

raise my hand and ask the teacher. If, as the day continues, I forget about the change in

schedule, I might get confused. If I do, I can look at the board and see the new

schedule.

Mario and I both know that sometimes things happen to change our schedules.

We can stay calm about this by reminding ourselves that something is different, and by

asking questions when we’re confused.

EARLY DISMISSAL

Sometimes in winter, it starts to snow when we’re at school. Sometimes, it

snows so hard that adults decide to close school early. Sometimes school is closed early

for another reason: Maybe the electrical power goes off, or there’s a problem with the

heater. This is called an early dismissal.

Early dismissals don’t happen very often, but when they do, my teacher and

other adults are there to help me. They help Mario too.

When Mario’s school dismisses early, this is what happens:

There is an announcement that school will dismiss at a set time

The teacher tells students that the early dismissal will require some

changes in class assignments and possibly homework. She/he will explain

those changes

School will be dismissed when the buses arrive to take students home

Parents will be told that students will be home early

If students are supposed to go to a friend’s house, or to an after-school

program, those people will be told too

My school has the same rules in place for early dismissal!

Mario is excited when there’s an early dismissal. But he knows that often when

he feels it big on the inside, he has to express it smaller in public. So he doesn’t jump

out of his seat and scream, “Yea, time off!” or anything like that. I can be just like Mario

and make expected choices when my school announces an early dismissal!

WORDS ABOUT WORDS!!

When Mario talks with other people, that is called “communication.”

Communication has its own vocabulary. It’s called “Street Vocabulary.” I’m going to

learn about “street vocabulary.” By knowing this vocabulary, I’ll be able to communicate

better with other people!

I’m going to learn four communication street vocabulary words at a time. Here

are the first four:

Tunnel Vision: Talking without “thinking with your eyes.” Talking without looking

Overload Road: Talking without thinking how the listener is taking in the message.

Talking on and on about something the listener isn’t interested in.

Interruption Junction: Interrupting someone’s thoughts with my own thought

(Sometimes also called “bumping words.”) or with an inappropriate (unexpected) body

movement, like just walking away!

Dead-End Bend: Responding to someone else’s question by not giving any information

for someone to think about or respond to. That ends a conversation immediately!

Example: someone asks me what I did today and I respond “nothing.”

COMMUNICATION STREET VOCABULARY

Mario knows “street vocabulary” about communication. Here are four more

vocabulary words:

Missed the Turn: The conversation changed slightly onto another topic and I did not realize it changed. I kept talking about the same old topic!

Detour: A person changes the topic when it’s not appropriate. (Someone else is talking about the weather and I make a comment about trains.)

Cop Stop: Clearly inappropriate (unexpected) comments or actions, such as telling someone he/she is ugly, or doing something unexpected like walking away from the group while conversation is continuing

Crash Mash: My body language and tone of voice do not match what the words mean. (Yelling at someone when I simply mean to share an idea.)

Mario likes it when I learn new communication vocabulary. So do I!

COMMUNICATION STREET VOCABULARY III

Mario knows the following street vocabulary words:

Speeding Ticket: Talking too fast

Running a Stop Sign: Making a lot of negative comments in a conversation so that people just wish I would stop!

Broken Engine: Completely ignoring the conversation with my body and my words.

One Way Street: Talking only about my interests

Carpool Lane: Sharing the conversational topic/asking questions about others that is on topic.

Good Driving Award: Doing everything just right!

I want to be a good communicator. I will learn my communication street vocabulary and work for a Good Driving Award!