PUBLISHED AND DISTRIBUTED WEEKLY BY PASSTIMES OF ARIZONA, LLC - PASSTIMESAZ@LIVE.COM - 480.983.9143

Vol. 18 Issue 21 All Rights Reserved © 2020

YOU LIVE IN CALIFORNIA IF You make over $250,000 and don’t own a suit or a tie.

You can't afford to buy a house

and you’re rich.

The fastest part of your com-

mute is going down your driveway.

You know how to eat an arti-

choke.

You feel strongly that

surfing could end global

warming.

Your bedtime prayer starts

with the word “Dude”.

YOU LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY IF Your first words were, “Hey, Taxi!”

You think Central Park IS 'nature,'

You've worn out your car horn.

You recognize eye contact as an act of aggression.

YOU LIVE IN THE

SOUTH IF You can rent a movie and

buy bait in the same store.

'y'all' is singular and 'all

y'all' is plural.

'He needed killin''' is a

valid defense.

Everyone has 2 first

names: Billy Bob , Mary

Sue, Betty Jean, etc.

http://www.thepasstimepaper.com/http://www.revhealthproducts.com/

ANYONE WITH MONEY TO BURN WILL ALWAYS FIND HIMSELF SURROUNDED BY PEOPLE WITH MATCHES

I'M ADDICTED TO PLACEBOS. I'D GIVE THEM UP, BUT IT WOULDN'T MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE

ARE YOU AFFLICTED? LOOK UNTO JESUS

http://www.coolidgechamber.org/http://www.3phasemech.com/http://www.queencreekchanber.com/http://www.santanvalleychamber.com/http://www.florenceazchamber.com/

I USED TO WORK IN A FIRE HYDRANT FACTORY. YOU COULDN'T PARK ANYWHERE NEAR THE PLACE

I AM ONE OF THOSE OLD-FASHIONED MINISTERS WHO BELIEVE THE WHOLE BIBLE AND EVERYTHING THAT IT CONTAINS - J.C. RYLE

http://www.daystarscreens.com/http://www.courageundercancerfoundation.org/

LOS ANGELES'S FULL NAME IS "EL PUEBLO DE NUESTRA SENORA LA REINA DE LOS ANGELES DE PORCIUNCULA."

LIFE OF THE PARTY On a fine Arizona afternoon a man was spotted driving along

the highway at a steady speed, when he

suddenly indicated right and pulled

off onto the shoulder. He quickly

jumped out of the car and opened

the trunk. From a large bag, he pro-

duced a party hat, streamers, a bottle

of lemonade, sandwiches and a cake.

After eating the food and drinking the lem-

onade, he launched into a little Irish jig.

The whole proceedings lasted about fifteen minutes, after

which he got back in his car and drove off.

Curious, the police followed him at a distance and half an

hour later, they saw him stop and repeat the whole procedure.

This was too much for the officers, so they decided to check

him out.

"Can we ask you the reason for all the stops and

the food, drink and Irish jigs?" one of the officers

asked.

"Well, sir," explained the man, "I'm on the

company's outin'."

"But you're the only one here," argued the

officer.

"Yeah, I know," replied the man. "I'm self-

employed!"

http://www.cleanyourgarage.net/

GODLY THOUGHTS ARE THE KEY TO GODLY ACTIONS - DR. CHARLES STANLEY

I'M NOT JUST A GARDENER, I'M A PLANT MANAGER

EXCEPTIONS PROVE THE RULE ... AND WRECK THE BUDGET

http://www.davethelockdoc.com/http://www.aceofshadesaz.com/http://www.thepasstimepaper.com/mailto:apachepeddlers@gmail.com

CALL TO ME AND I WILL ANSWER YOU AND TELL YOU GREAT AND UNSEARCHABLE THINGS YOU DO NOT KNOW. JEREMIAH 33:3

http://www.bitsnbytesstore.com/

WHEN WE TRUST JESUS AS OUR SAVIOR, OUR SINS ARE FORGIVEN FOREVER—CHARLES STANLEY

"DON'T GO AROUND SAYING THE WORLD OWES YOU A LIVING. THE WORLD OWES YOU NOTHING. IT WAS HERE FIRST" - MARK TWAIN

http://www.thepasstimepaper.com/http://www.sosptinc.org/http://www.thepasstimepaper.com/

HANG ON! YOU MAY BE NEXT IN LINE FOR A MIRACLE!

I JUST ASKED MY HUSBAND IF HE REMEMBERS WHAT TODAY IS... SCARING MEN IS SO EASY

* A swarm of 20,000 bees followed a

car for two days because their queen

was inside the vehicle. The insects

were removed by a beekeeper after the

car was parked, but were back the next

day, as the queen was still inside.

* Peter Ostrum, who portrayed Charlie Bucket in the original

"Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," declined the offer of a

three-picture deal and bought a horse with his movie earn-

ings. His resulting love for animals led him to pursue a career

not as an actor, but a veterinarian.

* During World War II, Coca-Cola wanted soldiers to have a

taste of home and opened bottling plants near Europe. How-

ever, the soda was synonymous with the States, making it

problematic for non-Americans to be seen drinking it, espe-

cially in the Soviet Union where it was viewed as a symbol of

American imperialism. Soviet Gen. Marshal Georgy Zhukov,

a fan who didn't want to be seen consuming it himself, ap-

pealed to the company to make a clear version. A chemist at

the Austrian bottling plant obliged by removing the drink's

coloring, after which "White Coke" was bottled in clear glass

with a white cap and red star.

* "Jeopardy" fan Cindy Stowell dreamed nearly her entire life

of being a contestant on the show. In 2016 she successfully

auditioned and became a six-time champion even while bat-

tling Stage 4 cancer during filming. Sadly, she didn't live to

see her episodes air, but her $103,000 in winnings was do-

nated to cancer organizations.

* "Alice in Wonderland" author Lewis Carroll wasn't the best

at personal finance. Sure, he paid his debts on time, but

would also often overdraft upwards of 7,500 pounds sterling -

- in spite of being a mathematics scholar at Ox-

ford!

* The Vatican Bank is the world's only

bank that allows ATM users to perform

transactions in Latin.

Thought for the Day: "Failure is a

bruise, not a tattoo." -- Jon Sinclair

(c) 2020 King Features Synd., Inc.

http://www.visitingangels.com/mesahttp://www.curves.com/http://www.billsawnings.com/