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Modesty=Modesty=Modesty=Modesty=constraintconstraintconstraintconstraint

This topic can be a tad bit This topic can be a tad bit This topic can be a tad bit This topic can be a tad bit controversial. Our goal is not controversial. Our goal is not controversial. Our goal is not controversial. Our goal is not

to condemn but instead to condemn but instead to condemn but instead to condemn but instead to to to to

challenge each ofchallenge each ofchallenge each ofchallenge each of us to make us to make us to make us to make

the best choices possible. the best choices possible. the best choices possible. the best choices possible. WWWWantantantant

to know the right direction to to know the right direction to to know the right direction to to know the right direction to

pursue? Consult Scripture!pursue? Consult Scripture!pursue? Consult Scripture!pursue? Consult Scripture!

Proverbs 11:22

“Like a gold ring in a pig’s

snout is a beautiful

woman who shows no

discretion.”

Psalm 45:11

Proverbs 1:1-7

Proverbs 3:21

Proverbs 4:23

Proverbs 31:30

I Timothy 2:9-10

I Peter 3:3-4

““““What Not to Wear” What Not to Wear” What Not to Wear” What Not to Wear” (According to the Bible)(According to the Bible)(According to the Bible)(According to the Bible) 1 Timothy 2:9 New Living Translation (NLT) “And I want women to be modest in 1 Timothy 2:9 New Living Translation (NLT) “And I want women to be modest in 1 Timothy 2:9 New Living Translation (NLT) “And I want women to be modest in 1 Timothy 2:9 New Living Translation (NLT) “And I want women to be modest in

their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attentioattentioattentioattention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or n to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or n to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or n to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes.”expensive clothes.”expensive clothes.”expensive clothes.” Modesty should not be defined by the world around us but by Gods Word.Modesty should not be defined by the world around us but by Gods Word.Modesty should not be defined by the world around us but by Gods Word.Modesty should not be defined by the world around us but by Gods Word.

Okay – I’ll admit it. I have watched episodes of that TLC show. Usually with abject

fascination – a little bit shocked at the discussions but often agreeing that the “after” is better

than the “before.” (Mainly thankful that they would probably not scope out a heartland mom

because goodness knows I could qualify for my preference of comfort over style.) One interesting

note: that show often challenges women to stop revealing so much. This is in stark contrast to the

way most women dress on television.

Modesty is not an easy issue to address. When I was in college, I was a part of a singing

group that traveled around some week-ends to minister in churches, and we always stayed with

different host families. One Sunday, my friend and I were a bit shocked when the host family’s

college age son showed up to eat his breakfast in a towel. I thought at first he didn’t realize that

we were there, but when he sat like that the whole meal and his mom didn’t even say anything, I

decided to try to be gracious and act like this was normal. Not a lot of modesty going on there!

Our culture definitely seems to have a “flaunt” it philosophy. How do we respond as

Christian moms? How do we keep ourselves attractive but yet be appropriate? How do we teach

our children how to appreciate outer beauty yet focus on their inner qualities? I knew that I

needed to have assistance in tackling this tough issue. Mentor Sandy Schindler agreed to help, and

she found an excellent article by a pastor’s wife, Pam Hardy, entitled “Modesty Matters.” Sandy

graciously summarized/excerpted the article for us, and we wanted to share it with you today.

One reasonOne reasonOne reasonOne reason that this is such a difficult issue to tackle is because the popular

culture is so strongly opposed to the biblical standard. There is a scripture in Jeremiah

that talks about the children of Israel and it says, “They were not ashamed, and they did

not know how to blush” [Jeremiah 6:15, 8:12]. Well, ladies, today I think we live in a

culture that does not know how to blush.

Nancy Leigh DeMoss has written a great book called, The Look, and in this

book she contrasts what the world says about how we should dress and what the Bible

says, and as is often the case they are diametrically opposed to one another. For

instance, the world says beauty is external and physical.

The Bible tells us that beauty is internal and spiritual. The world says you should

dress for people to notice you. The Bible says we are to dress to please God and to

glorify Him. The world tells us that the purpose of clothing is to uncover and to reveal.

The Bible says the purpose of clothing is to cover and to conceal.

I. THE NEED FOR MODESTY

A. The Fall (Genesis 3). The first reason is because of the Fall that we find described in

Genesis 3. We need to understand that there is a theological foundation for modesty

that goes back to Adam & Eve. The very first thing after the Fall—what did Adam & Eve

do? They looked for fig leaves to cover themselves up. They immediately tried to cover

their nakedness. So the very first result of the guilt of sin was the recognition that they

were immodest. When you read the account of the Fall it becomes clear that clothing is

a direct result of the guilt of sin. Before the Fall, Adam & Eve had no fear that their

nakedness could ever be used for evil purposes. But when sin entered the world it

changed everything and the innocence of nakedness was lost forever. And you will find,

as you study the Bible, after Genesis, chapter 3, whenever nakedness is mentioned,

except in the context of marriage, it is always associated with shame. (Continued on p.3)

First Free MopsFirst Free MopsFirst Free MopsFirst Free Mops

Newsletter # Newsletter # Newsletter # Newsletter # 8888

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Dive into Five for Moms Five books to read Five books to read Five books to read Five books to read about about about about ModestyModestyModestyModesty

As you can imagine, finding proper books at the library

about this topic is almost possible. I found one: And

the Bride Wore White: Seven Secrets to Sexual Purity

by Dannah Gresh. (She and her husband wrote

another book about sexual integrity in the culture

that is also available). So my other book suggestions

are ones that would need to be purchased. Find a

friend who is also interested in this topic – each buy a

book, then swap! So, here are 5 more books.

Andreola, Karen Beautiful Girlhood

Courtney, Vicki Your Girl: Raising a Godly

Daughter in an Ungodly World

Gresh, Dannah Secret Keeper: The Delicate

Power of Modesty (Bonus: she also wrote Six

Ways to Keep the Little in Your Girl)

McDonald, Stacy Raising a Maiden of Virtue

Note: I did not preview ANY of these booNote: I did not preview ANY of these booNote: I did not preview ANY of these booNote: I did not preview ANY of these books ks ks ks –––– all all all all

but one must be purchased. Also, several of the but one must be purchased. Also, several of the but one must be purchased. Also, several of the but one must be purchased. Also, several of the

books are rather conservatibooks are rather conservatibooks are rather conservatibooks are rather conservative, so if you are not that ve, so if you are not that ve, so if you are not that ve, so if you are not that

way, you may want to read reviews before buying way, you may want to read reviews before buying way, you may want to read reviews before buying way, you may want to read reviews before buying

the titles. Please suggest further titles if you know the titles. Please suggest further titles if you know the titles. Please suggest further titles if you know the titles. Please suggest further titles if you know

any. We are glad to pass on good informaany. We are glad to pass on good informaany. We are glad to pass on good informaany. We are glad to pass on good information.tion.tion.tion.

Life Preserver (Time tested tips from other moms (Time tested tips from other moms (Time tested tips from other moms (Time tested tips from other moms for for for for

when you are up a creek without a paddle)when you are up a creek without a paddle)when you are up a creek without a paddle)when you are up a creek without a paddle)

I think all of us moms have a checklist (or at least a mental one) when we

need to leave the house the house. Maybe we need one for modesty as

well. I love these tips from one of our MOPs moms.

The one suggestion I have is the Mirror test. Bend over in front of mirror to see if your cleavage is too much. Many ladies don't think about how people can see straight down your top when you lean forward (or bend down to pick up a kid) with most shirts. Also, do a bend over view from the back. Make sure when you bend down.... no undies hanging out :) I asked a girlfriend once if my dress was too low-cut that I bought for a wedding. She said do the mirror test, then imagine you are sitting across from your pastor during the meal. If you would feel uncomfortable with the thought of your pastor seeing you like that, that probably means that the outfit is too revealing. For a more detailed modesty checklist, please visit: http://www.thepentecostalchurch.net/files/Documents/MDModestyChecklist.pdf

Here are some recommended resources from Pam Hardy (the Here are some recommended resources from Pam Hardy (the Here are some recommended resources from Pam Hardy (the Here are some recommended resources from Pam Hardy (the

author of author of author of author of today’s column entitledtoday’s column entitledtoday’s column entitledtoday’s column entitled “Modesty Matters “Modesty Matters “Modesty Matters “Modesty Matters....” )” )” )” )

Nancy Leigh Nancy Leigh Nancy Leigh Nancy Leigh DeMossDeMossDeMossDeMoss, , , , The LookThe LookThe LookThe Look.... [Buchanan, MI: Rev [Buchanan, MI: Rev [Buchanan, MI: Rev [Buchanan, MI: Revive Our ive Our ive Our ive Our

Hearts, 2003].Hearts, 2003].Hearts, 2003].Hearts, 2003].

Nancy Leigh Nancy Leigh Nancy Leigh Nancy Leigh DeMossDeMossDeMossDeMoss, , , , What Does Your Clothing What Does Your Clothing What Does Your Clothing What Does Your Clothing CommunicateCommunicateCommunicateCommunicate? ? ? ? [Gresham, OR: Eternal Perspective [Gresham, OR: Eternal Perspective [Gresham, OR: Eternal Perspective [Gresham, OR: Eternal Perspective

Ministries, 2004].Ministries, 2004].Ministries, 2004].Ministries, 2004].

Mary Mary Mary Mary MohlerMohlerMohlerMohler,,,, ModelingModelingModelingModeling Modesty Modesty Modesty Modesty.... Southern Seminary Southern Seminary Southern Seminary Southern Seminary

Magazine, Magazine, Magazine, Magazine, TheTheTheThe Beauty of Biblical Womanhood Beauty of Biblical Womanhood Beauty of Biblical Womanhood Beauty of Biblical Womanhood.... Winter, Winter, Winter, Winter,

2003.2003.2003.2003. ( ( ( (www.sbwww.sbwww.sbwww.sbts.edu/resources/ssmag.phpts.edu/resources/ssmag.phpts.edu/resources/ssmag.phpts.edu/resources/ssmag.php))))

Josh Harris, Josh Harris, Josh Harris, Josh Harris, Not Even A HintNot Even A HintNot Even A HintNot Even A Hint.... [Sisters, OR:[Sisters, OR:[Sisters, OR:[Sisters, OR: Multnomah Multnomah Multnomah Multnomah

Publishers, Inc., 2003].Publishers, Inc., 2003].Publishers, Inc., 2003].Publishers, Inc., 2003].

Melody Green, Melody Green, Melody Green, Melody Green, Uncovering the Truth Uncovering the Truth Uncovering the Truth Uncovering the Truth AboutAboutAboutAbout Modesty Modesty Modesty Modesty.... ((((www.lastdaysministries.org/articleswww.lastdaysministries.org/articleswww.lastdaysministries.org/articleswww.lastdaysministries.org/articles.).).).)

Website recommendations from Gretchen: Website recommendations from Gretchen: Website recommendations from Gretchen: Website recommendations from Gretchen:

http://www.robinjonesgifford.com/ (Our speaker’s blog)

http://www.secretkeepergirl.com/index.aspx

http://purefreedom.org/ and http://www.shaunti.com/

Taking the PlungeTaking the PlungeTaking the PlungeTaking the Plunge

15 minutes at the spa15 minutes at the spa15 minutes at the spa15 minutes at the spa (Feeling refreshed in a short amount of time) Shopping!Shopping!Shopping!Shopping! Maybe today’s talk will provide a good

excuse for you to update your wardrobe or that of

your children. A recommended “mom’s” store:

White House Black Market. Even though the

clothes are bit more pricey, one MOPs mom noted

that clothes bought from there stay in style even

several years later. Need places to shop for kids?

Finding clothes that fit kids without making them

look too grown up can be a challenge. According

to secretkeepergirl.com, some of the stores with

the most age- appropriate yet stylish clothing are

Gap Kids, Old Navy, Lands End (found at Sears)

and Children’s Place. One of our MOPs moms also

likes to shop at Gymboree for fun kids clothes. If

you have any other “modest” store suggestions,

please post them on our Facebook page.

Plunging into First Free MOPsPlunging into First Free MOPsPlunging into First Free MOPsPlunging into First Free MOPs

Today at MOPs

Speaker: Robin Gifford

“Modesty”

MOPs 2nd Semester money is due: $56 Please pay this amount ASAP either to Kendra or leave a check in the envelope on your table.

MoppetsMoppetsMoppetsMoppets This winter we will be learning more

about Jesus & His teachings. Today

we are looking at Jesus as a boy at

the temple.

verse: Luke 2:52Luke 2:52Luke 2:52Luke 2:52

And JesusJesusJesusJesus grewgrewgrewgrew inininin wisdomwisdomwisdomwisdom and

stature, and inininin favor with God and

men.

Questions:

• How old was Jesus in our

story?

• Where did He go with His

parents?

• What surprised the people

in the temple?

Next MOPs

(1/24) Friendship Group Day

MOPPETS PJ DAY

Please have your child

wear their modest PJs to

class that day. Moms can

feel free to join them.

Friendship Day is a great

day to be comfortable!

(Continued from page 1 – the rest of the article will be concluded on page 4) B. The Similarities between men and women (James 1:14-15; 1 John 2:16).

In James, chapter 1, it says this, “But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by

his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin;

and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.” In 1 John 2:16, it says this, “For all

that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of

life—is not of the Father but is of the world.” These scriptures tell us how men and

women are similar in their temptation to sin. These things affect both of us: “The

lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.” Both men and women

have to be on guard against those things.

C. The differences between men & women (Job 31:1; Proverbs 7:10;Romans 14:12-13).

And one of the main differences that is crucial here, is that God has designed men

to be more visual. Women tend to be more verbal—men tend to be more visual. In

Proverbs, chapter 7, verse 10, it says this, “And there a woman met him, with the

attire of a harlot, and a crafty heart.” Look at that phrase, “the attire of a harlot”—

the Bible specifically calls attention to the way an immoral woman dresses. Why? Why

does it do that? Because that is one of the main ways that men are tempted. Now

think about it, the Bible never talks about how an immoral man dresses—why not?

Because for most women sight is not a major avenue of temptation, but for men it is

a different story, because men are tempted by what they see. Remember what Job

said, in Job 31:1, he said, “I have made a covenant with my eyes; why then should I

look upon a young woman?” I think of King David. When did all his trouble start with

Bathsheba? What was he doing? Remember it tells us, he was walking on his roof one

evening and “he saw” Bathsheba. He saw her bathing and he was tempted through

what he saw. Nancy DeMoss, in her book, says this, “What a man’s touch is to a

woman, the sight of a woman is to a man.” That’s how important it is and how

powerful it is. My heart really just goes out to the men because they are surrounded

by temptations every day, and I think as Christian women we should take this very

seriously, that we are not to make men stumble with how we dress. When men come

to church they should be able to rest. They should have a little bit of a respite from

this constant temptation that they face out in the world.

Now, let me hasten to say this, immodesty is no excuse for lust. A man cannot

control what women wear, but he can control what he looks at. So yes, the bottom

line is this: it is still basically the man’s responsibility, but ladies they don’t need any

help sinning. Don’t be guilty of feeding those sinful thoughts by the way you dress.

Nancy DeMoss says this, “As Christian women, our clothing choices can either

help men succeed morally or can put temptation in their path that they may find

difficult to overcome. This means that both men and women are responsible for

moral purity. We should do everything in our power to help our brothers stand and

to be sure that our dress and our appearance brings glory to God.” I want to give

you a foundational principle to remember and this is it: if you dress in a way that

draws attention to a certain part of the body and makes a man take a second and a

third look—it is wrong. What kind of reactions are you trying to get?

A college pastor was preparing to teach on this subject & he asked his Bible Study

leaders to write down what the main temptations were to them in how a girl dresses.

And let me remind you, these are guys who love the Lord with all their hearts. They

are trying their best to live holy, godly lives. These are not men off the street. But

they were very honest about things that were temptations to them, and here were

the things they listed: 1. Low pants 2. Midriff showing 3. Bare shoulders 4. Cleavage 5.Low necklines 6.Thin tops 7.Tight form-fitted tops 8.Tight pants 9. High Skirt slits

January Birthdays

4 Paula Davis

13 Kristin Schulte

Kelly Watson

20 Tiffany Crounse

23 Amy Olson

25 Heather Hill

December Baby

Everett Benjamin to Rebecca

Reis on December 21st

Steering TeamSteering TeamSteering TeamSteering Team Members Members Members Members

Co-cordinators:

Sarah Opp and Christina Lovercheck

Creative Activities:

Anita Hains

Finance Coordinator:

Kendra Jantzen

Friendship Group Leaders Co- Coordinators:

Kelly Watson and Suzy Plettner

Fundraising: Tiffany Maly

Hospitality: Nicole Smith and Elisabeth

Woods

Mentors: Lorri Goode, Pam Larson, Danelle

Mills and Sandy Schindler

Moppets: Rhonda Otto

Publicity: Gretchen Garrison

To contact us:

firstfreemops@gmail.comfirstfreemops@gmail.comfirstfreemops@gmail.comfirstfreemops@gmail.com

First EvangelicFirst EvangelicFirst EvangelicFirst Evangelical Free Churchal Free Churchal Free Churchal Free Church

3300 S. 843300 S. 843300 S. 843300 S. 84thththth Lilncoln, NE 68506 Lilncoln, NE 68506 Lilncoln, NE 68506 Lilncoln, NE 68506

One last thing to consider here is modesty in the home. It is so

important to set a good example, be modest around your

children. Set a good example for them. My husband and I have

always been very careful around the house to be modest.

Cleavage is for your husband and nobody else—nobody else.

When you dress modestly, what are the results? You glorify God

and you please Him, and you will be an encouragement to both

men and women. You will not be tempting men and you will be

setting a good example for women.”

©2005 by Pam Hardy, All Rights Reserved To read the whole article visit: http://www.biblebb.com/files/ModestyMatters.htm

NotesNotesNotesNotes

Going for gold in the individual medley (celebrating our group!)Going for gold in the individual medley (celebrating our group!)Going for gold in the individual medley (celebrating our group!)Going for gold in the individual medley (celebrating our group!)