[type text] out of the shadows - tennessee …tspn.org/wp-content/uploads/oos-11.pdf[type text] out...

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OUT OF THE SHADOWS A NEWSLETTER FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE GRIEVING

FOR SOMEONE LOST TO SUICIDE

Issue 11 | March/April 2015

Table of Contents

It’s true that she’s always in the back of my mind.

But she’s not always on my mind.

When I think of her now, I remember her warmly.

I rarely cry anymore out of hurt or anger.

But there are times when something can throw me right back to that day.

And the depth of my feelings of loss and pain once again equal the depth

of my love for her.

And I cry. I hurt.

But it reminds me all the more that she will always be part of my life, and

she’s special enough to care about.

Time has healed me.

But time has not made me forget.

by Janis Keyser Heil

In memory of Jessica

Even Bikers Get the Blues 2

I’m Gonna Hold On 4

As Long As 4

Inside the Darkness 5

Remembrances 6

Grief Support and Survivor’s Meeting 7

Need Help Right Now? 7

TSPN Regional Meetings 8

At left: The “Love Never Dies” Memorial Quilt from 2012, unveiled during

that year’s Suicide Prevention Awareness Day event in Nashville. These

quilts are routinely displayed at TSPN suicide educational and awareness

events all over Tennessee.

This is an ongoing project, and TSPN is interested in receiving panels for

future quilts. Anyone is welcome to contribute a quilt square, no matter

how long ago you lost someone or how active you are in TSPN. Also, there

is no charge to memorialize anyone on the quilt.

More information about the "Love Never Dies" quilt project is available at

http://tspn.org/quilt. Any additional questions may be directed to

Karyl Chastain Beal, chair of our Quilt Committee, at

[email protected] or (931) 388-9289.

Thoughts on an Anniversary

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OUT OF THE SHADOWS Issue 11 | March/April 2015 2

The Tennessee Suicide Prevention Network is partnering with local

suicide prevention activist Chuck Lambert, his wife Dorothy, and Harley-

Davidson dealerships across Tennessee to stage V13ION (pronounced

“vision”), a motorcycle rally planned for Labor Day Weekend 2015.

For the last four years, Chuck has organized and hosted a ride at his

business, Breezin Metal Works, in the southeastern part of the state to

honor the memory of his son and raise awareness for suicide prevention.

Chad “Chubbs” Lambert was an accomplished tattoo artist, motocross

racer, and just starting to gain recognition for his paintings when he lost

his life to suicide in 2010. Past events have involved 400 participants and

raised funds that went directly to first responders for suicide prevention.

This year, Chuck, Dorothy, the Jason Foundation, Inc., TSPN, and Harley

-Davidson dealerships across Tennessee are joining forces to take our

V13ION statewide: no more lives lost, no more hearts torn by suicide.

The event will include a memorial ride for all Tennesseans that have lost

their lives to suicide, with check-in stations at local Harley-Davidson

dealerships—each one offering information and resources about mental

health and suicide prevention. Individual riders, as well as teams, will

collect pledges ahead of the event, with a custom-built reverse-flow

smoker with trailer awarded to the dealership that raises the most funds

for suicide awareness and prevention.

The following is Chuck’s account of how his grief over his son’s death led

to the establishment of this project.

On May 22, 2010, I got the news that no one ever wants to receive: my oldest son had committed suicide on his 36th birthday. Chad had

moved to Texas 16 years ago to follow his dreams and passion as a tattoo artist. He had become very successful in the tattoo business and

was also becoming recognized for his paintings and photography. Chad had fallen into depression; close friends brushed it off as something

that would pass and just part of dealing with the success and failures of life. We know now that Chad had not been himself for a long time;

his depression had not just come about, it had actually been coming on for years.

After his death I was totally overwhelmed with guilt, I blamed myself, I blamed others, I blamed Chad. I prayed more then I ever had in my

life, asking God for help. I didn’t know what to do; there was and still is an emptiness that I cannot explain but I knew I had to figure out

some way to survive myself. I began learning more than I thought possible about suicide and suicidal tendencies. I went on the Out of the

Darkness walks; I’m reading everything I can. I learned that suicide is an epidemic, it’s outpacing all types of other illnesses, I learned that

depression is a disease and not just a wimpy excuse like I had always thought. I decided I needed to get involved to help raise awareness and

to make a difference in Chad’s honor and to also give me a sense of purpose. Chad and I shared a strong passion for riding motorcycles so I

decided I’d have a memorial ride in his honor.

In 2011 I invited family and friends to spend the weekend with me riding motorcycles and celebrating Chad’s life. I set up camping facilities

for RV’s and tent campers at my shop, arranged discounts at area motels and worked with all the different police departments our

motorcycle ride would be traveling through. We had 60 motorcycles and around 125 people attended the first year.

We had such a great response I decided to do it again, only next time we’d try and raise money to donate to our cause. I built a 20-foot all-

aluminum motorcycle trailer for a raffle. I organized the first-ever motorcycle ride into the closed Brushy Mount Prison. We had 106

motorcycles and around 175 people attend.

(continued on page 3)

Even Bikers Get the Blues

This photo of Chad is from a gallery assembled by his friend Aaron “Reemer”

Remkus, a professional photographer based out of Arlington, Texas. More

photos of Chad are available on the website of Remkus’s studio 11Kphotos

(www.11kphotos.com/chad_lambert).

V13ION takes its name from the number 13, Chad’s motocross racing

number. It also draws attention to the fact that someone in the United States

dies by suicide every 13 minutes on average, according to the latest figures

from the American Association of Suicidology.

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OUT OF THE SHADOWS Issue 11 | March/April 2015

Even Bikers Get the Blues (continued)

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The third year we built a 10-foot reverse flow smoker and trailer for raffle, had 90 motorcycles, and around

200 people attend. The fourth year we built a smoker grill combo, had 125 motorcycles and 250 people

attend.

While organizing our 200-300 mile rides, working with all the rural police and sheriff’s departments, I learned

they all were underfunded for training their first responders in suicide, awareness, prevention, and PTSD. So I

decided that would be where we donated the monies raised.

After this year’s event I was totally exhausted; as much as I loved what I was doing I knew in my heart that I

could not continue. My business, my home, and most importantly my family and health were suffering

because I was 100% committed to the event. I told my wife and some very close friends that this was it, that I

wasn’t doing another. I still wanted to help, but I couldn’t continue on this scale; it had just gotten way bigger

then what I could do alone. I was very hesitant to announce it was over because in my heart I wanted to

continue. Then out of the blue I got an e-mail about some group called TSPN wanting to create a license tag

for suicide prevention. I called the number, got put on their distribution list,

and attended my first meeting in August 2014. I met some amazing people

that shared my passion for making a difference and for four years never

knew they existed.

I shared my story and what my original V13ION had been, but how

exhausted I had become over the past several years and how I didn’t want

to stop but I couldn’t carry on. Already feeling out of place in this meeting

since I was the only tattooed-biker-type amongst a room full of

professionals, I was totally taken aback by the warm loving reception I was

given.

For the first time in four years, I had finally found a group that

understood me and we shared the same V13ION. I had found my home.

Catch the V13ION

More information about V13ION is available on

the TSPN website (http://tspn.org/v13ion).

To register for the event itself, go to

http://v13ion.eventbrite.com.

Also check the dealership donation track

(https://sites.google.com/site/v13iontrack) to

check on how much money your favorite

dealership has raised.

Top left: Chuck and Dorothy Fults-Lambert at a previous

motorcycle rally on the site of the former Brushy Mountain

State Penitentiary. Other photos from previous rallies are

featured at left and bottom.

At right: Chuck Lambert (third from right), TSPN Executive

Director Scott Ridgway (second from right) and others pose

for a group photo at Boswell's Harley-Davidson in Nashville,

having visited the shop to promote V13ION.

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“Out of the Shadows” wants your articles,

poetry, prose, and artwork for the next issue and the ones to

come. We’ll also need suggestions and recommendations on

how we can make it better.

If there’s a piece you want to submit to the newsletter, send it

to [email protected] with the subject line “OOS Submission”.

Feedback and suggestions can also be sent to this address with

the subject line “OOS Feedback”.

I’m Gonna Hold On

Lyrics copyright 2010 Richard Carl Evans.

Listen to Richard perform the song at

http://youtu.be/wNwHBUaCcd8.

I know there are no promises for tomorrow.

All must meet their maker someday.

And now that you’re gone, I’ll be strong

I’ll hang on to the memories from yesterday.

Let me say here and now, I thank you

For what you gave and what you left behind.

Your kind words and helping hand

have made me understand

That those who give can never die.

I’m gonna hold on to your laughter,

I’m gonna hold on to your smile,

I’m gonna hold on to the good times we

shared together.

Together you and I, yes I’m gonna hold on.

And now that you’re gone, I’ll be strong.

I’ll hold on to the memories from yesterday.

I’m gonna hold on to your laughter,

I’m gonna hold on to your smile,

I’m gonna hold on to the good times we

shared together.

Together you and I, yes I’m gonna hold on.

As long as I can dream,

As long as I can think,

As long as I have memory ...

I will love you.

As long as I have eyes to see,

And ears to hear

And lips to speak ...

I will love you.

As long as I have a heart to feel,

A soul stirring within me,

An imagination to hold you ...

I will love you.

As long as there is time,

As long as there is love

As long as I have a breath to speak your name ...

I will love you.

Because I loved you more

than anything in all

the world.

by Daniel Haughton

As Long As

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Tuesday, May 12 - 6pm - 9pm

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Remembrances


If you would like to remember

your loved one in

“Out of the Shadows”,

please send your loved one’s name,

birth date, death date, your name,

and your email address to [email protected]

with the subject line

“Remembrance.”

Dustin Kyle Puckett

3/1/1968-12/9/2002

Steven H. Honeycutt

3/1/1975-1/18/2012

Jeffery Alan Burnett

3/1/1983-5/1/2007

Larry G. Roark

3/5/1943-9/4/2011

Michael Moore Beckwith

3/5/1952-1/4/2000

Timothy Gill

3/6/1961-5/7/2000

David Clifton Deveraux

3/6/1965-8/20/2006

Billy “Bill” Sherill Lowe

9/11/1938-3/6/2013

Daniel Owen Hepburn

3/9/1973-2/20/2010

Tiffany Ann Cantrell

3/9/1981-7/22/2006

Marla Irwin Byrd

3/11/1967-2/28/1991

Debbie Gulliot

3/12/1959-11/27/2004

Nicholas James Aanderud

2/21/1986-3/13/2011

Marianne Woodruff

8/18/1932-3/12/2014

Rebecca Annette Holt Johnson

4/30/1944-3/14/1999

Michael Lee Culbreath

3/15/1965-6/22/2004

Shep Case

5/27/1993-3/17/2009

David Christopher Cotton

12/5/1988-3/17/2010

Dylan James Pitman

3/18/1992-6/17/2013

Andrew McQueen Carroll

4/18/1976-8/14/2010

Brenda Chouinard Gagnon

6/2/1974-4/19/2013

Jennifer Shea Atnip

1/14/1975-4/21/2002

Joseph James "Joe" Costal

1/24/1981-4/23/2013

Kimberly Kerfien

4/24/1968-6/9/2007

Paul John Sanders

12/31/1974-4/24/2005

Susan Nye Woehr

4/25/1947-10/28/2007

Lowell Ratcliff

4/26/1924-5/18/2008

Jeffrey Adam Presnell

8/18/1989-4/27/2011

Sean McKitrick

11/28/1984-4/28/2004

Juanita Suzette Douglas

12/3/1949-4/28/2007

Terry Lynn Nelson

4/29/1957-12/25/2006

Flora Elizabeth Burridge

5/30/1963-4/29/2003

NOTE:

Flora and Marc Burridge are

husband and wife.

Kimberly Kerfien and Corey Onken are

mother and son.

Philip Woodrow Robertson

3/24/1969-7/18/1989

Matthew Lawrence Cook

3/25/1972-2/15/2012

Timothy Wallace Lehr

8/14/1965-3/25/2008

Marc Anthony Burridge

3/27/1967-6/30/2003

John Matthew “Matt” Brittingham

3/30/1977-7/5/2006

Scott Zingheim

8/20/1962-3/31/2011

John Steven Trewhella

2/1/1955-4/3/2014

Eric James Powell

4/4/1972-5/17/1999

Jarid Michael Henry

4/4/1988-6/8/2003

Roger Dale Smith, Jr.

11/15/1985-4/4/2010

Steven Ray Morris

10/15/1980-4/5/2001

Tyler Holcomb Dickson

9/5/1979-4/6/2003

Harley David Snider

4/7/1979-10/15/1994

Matthew Stephen Burson

4/8/1980-7/28/2011

Richard Allen LaBonte

12/24/1943-4/11/2007

Corey Onken

12/8/1988-4/13/2006

Hugh Martin Mitchell, Jr.

12/20/1955-4/14/1998

Early Lee White

2/20/1950-4/15/2007

Anne Greenfield Dyer

4/30/1955-4/16/2012

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West Tennessee

Memphis

Healing Hearts Suicide Grief Support Group

Kerry Mitchell

[email protected]

(901) 743-4701

Middle Tennessee

Centerville

Left Behind By Suicide

Rosa Newton

[email protected]

(931) 996-1225

Clarksville

Survivors of Suicide

Cindy Johnson

[email protected]

(931) 206-5653

Columbia

GRief After SuicideS (GRASS)

Karyl Chastain Beal

[email protected]

(931) 388-9289

1st Thursday of each month

grief-after-suicide.com

Cookeville

“Journey” grief support groups

(931) 525-2600

[email protected]

Franklin


[email protected]

(615) 244-7444

Murfreesboro


Karen Potratz

[email protected]

(615) 904-8623, extension 53


[email protected]

(615) 244-7444

Nashville


[email protected]

(615) 244-7444

Spring Hill

Left Behind By Suicide

Douglas Johnson

[email protected]

(615) 435-9621

East Tennessee

Chattanooga

SITE (Suicide Isn’t the End)

Gloria Hastings

[email protected]

(423) 544-7608 for meeting times

Jefferson City

ComPaSS

Cynthia Lynn

[email protected]

(865) 680-3256

Johnson City/Gray

Tri-Cities Survivors of Suicide

Linda Harold [email protected]

Harold Leonard [email protected]

Heather Barnett [email protected]

(423) 913-1255 or 245-5608

Knoxville

Suicide Grievers Support Group

Paula J. Alexander, LCSW, CGC

[email protected]

(865) 671-9631

Maryville

Blount County Survivors of Suicide

Barbara Lasater

[email protected]

(865) 984-4223

For more information on survivors’ groups and for

information on other survivors’ groups

outside Tennessee proper which have members

from Tennessee (in other words, far eastern

Tennessee and the Memphis area ), please visit

http://tspn.org/for-survivors-of-suicide.

Grief Support & Survivors’ Meetings

Need Help Right Now?

Losing a loved one to suicide is emotionally overwhelming. Survivors of

suicide are at risk for attempting suicide because of the emotional upheaval

they are experiencing. Feelings of hopelessness, feeling trapped, feeling

like a burden to others, increased alcohol or drug consumption, sleeping too

little or too much, and withdrawing or feeling isolated from others are signs

that you or a loved one may need help now.

If you or a loved one are feeling suicidal, please seek help immediately. Call

the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK or visit

www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

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TSPN works across the state to eliminate the stigma of suicide and educate communities about the warning signs

of suicide, with the ultimate goal of reducing suicide rates in the state of Tennessee. TSPN’s continued success is

due in large part to volunteers willing to donate their time and energy. If you would like to volunteer with TSPN,

please call (615) 297-1077 or e-mail [email protected].

TSPN Regional Meetings East Tennessee Region (monthly, 3rd Thursday, 12:15 PM)

Third Floor Conference Room, Cherokee Health Systems, 2018 Western Avenue, Knoxville, 37921

Memphis/Shelby County Region (monthly, 3rd Tuesday, 11:30 AM)

Memphis Crisis Centers Training Facility, 70 North Pauline, Memphis, 38105

Mid-Cumberland Region (monthly, 2nd Thursday, 9:30 AM)

Tennessee Voices for Children, 701 Bradford Avenue, 37204

Northeast Region (monthly, 4th Tuesday, 10:30 AM)

Boone’s Creek Christian Church, 305 Christian Church Road, Gray, 37615

Rural West (monthly, 3rd Wednesday, 10:30 AM)

Behavioral Health Initiatives, 36C Sandstone Circle, Jackson, 38305

South Central (monthly, 1st Wednesday, 11:00 AM)

Conference Room A, South Central Regional Health Office, 1216 Trotwood Avenue, Columbia, 38401

Southeast Region (monthly, 1st Thursday, 10:00 AM)

Mental Health Cooperative of Chattanooga, 801 North Holtzclaw Avenue, Suite 101, Chattanooga, 37404

Upper Cumberland Region (monthly, 4th Thursday, 9:00 AM)

Volunteer Behavioral Health, 1200 Willow Avenue, Cookeville, 38502

Blount County Mental Health Awareness and Suicide Prevention Alliance (monthly, 1st Friday, 12:00 PM)

Boys and Girls Club Meeting Room, Fort Craig Elementary School, 520 South Washington Street, Maryville, 37804

Giles County Suicide Prevention Task Force (quarterly, 3rd Monday, 1:30 PM)

Giles County Career Center, 125 South Cedar Lane, Pulaski, 38478

Hickman-Perry County Suicide Prevention Task Force (monthly, 4th Friday, 1:30 PM)

Senior Care Building, Hickman Community Hospital, 135 East Swan Street, Centerville, 37033

Montgomery-Houston-Humphreys-Stewart Suicide Prevention Task Force (bi-monthly, 1st Tuesday, 9 AM)

Youth Villages, 651 Stowe Court, Clarksville, 37040

Rutherford County Suicide Prevention Coalition (monthly, 1st Tuesday, 6 PM)

TrustPoint Hospital, 1009 North Thompson Lane, Murfreesboro, 37129

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