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Tuning in and Embracing

the Challenging Toddler

November 7, 2016

Holly Hatton-Bowers, PhD

hattonb@unl.edu

Practice using the chat area

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Please send to ALL Participants

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During the webinar, we will engage in Quick WritesQuick Write:In the text chat area please write your questions, feedback, and comments.

Introductions

Holly Hatton-Bowers

Assistant Professor and Infant Toddler Specialist

Purpose of Today’s Webinar

• Describe challenging behaviors demonstrated by toddlers to help child care providers understand why these behaviors occur

• Explore reasons behind challenging behavior for toddlers

• Discuss specific strategies for supporting toddlers when they are experiencing challenges and ideas for preventing challenging behaviors

• Examine ways to discuss challenging behaviors with parents/caregivers

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What is challenging behavior?

The Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning’s definition of challenging behavior for children from birth to 5 years old is: • Any repeated pattern of behavior that interferes with learning

or engagement in prosocial interactions with peers and adults, and

• Behaviors that are not responsive to the use of developmentally appropriate guidance procedures.

• Embedded in the caregiver-child relationship and interactions (Smith & Fox, 2003)

Examining Acting Out andWithdrawing Behaviors

Acting Out Withdrawing • Looking sad• Not showing a

preference for a caregiver

• Rarely talking• Not making eye

contact• Overly avoidant or

compliant with caregiver

• Frequent or intense tantrums

• Pushing • Hitting• Biting • Persistent refusal

to participate• Harm to self and

others• Inconsolable crying

Poll

Are you comfortable helping toddlers with their challenging behaviors?• Yes

• No

• Somewhat

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Why focus on challenging behaviors in the toddler years? • Young children demonstrating challenging behaviors associated or predictive of:

• Peer rejection• Academic challenges• Delinquency• Later substance abuse• Punitive contacts with teachers

• Families are frustrated

• Classrooms are disrupted

What does behavior tell us? Unable to:• Form close and secure relationships that are

responsive and consistent• Feel safe to explore the environment and learn• Experience, regulate and express emotions

Behaviors you see

Reasons andUnmet Needs

Infant and Toddler Needs

Feeling safeConsistent, trusting, responsive relationship with one adult

Environment matches child temperament

Good nutrition

Good healthStructure and consistency

Adequate restStimulating and engaging environment

Opportunity to move A sense of belonging with family and culture

Sensory Integration

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Common Reasons for Toddlers Using Challenging Behavior to CommunicateChallenges or lack

of skills in communicating

Medical or health problems

Temperament Lack of Sleep

Sensory challengesDiscontinuity in the

home and child care settings

Challenges in the home environment

(i.e., material depression)

Developmental Surge

Combination of more than one of these

Digging Deeper: Vignette

What’s beneath the challenging behavior?

Recognize, Reflect, Respond

• Behavior has a purpose• Infants and toddlers’ behavior is not manipulation

Recognize: The child is having a difficult, challenging time, not trying to be difficult

Reflect: What is the intent of the child’s communication?

Respond (not react): Identify ways to fulfill the need of the child or helping the child learn other ways to communicate needs

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Reflect: What is the meaning of the behavior?

• Focus on the child’s experience (what is the purpose of the behavior?)

• Be intentional in your problem-solving

• Respond with empathy

Reflect: What is developmentally appropriate?

• Self-Control

• Caregiver-child interactions and the development of a secure attachment and secure relationships, provides the framework for child’s development of self-control

• Self-control is the adaptive and voluntary control over your thoughts, feelings, and actions

• Self-control is necessary to cooperate, follow directions, control impulses, and manage negative emotions.

Recent Survey of Parents: Expectation Gap

• Skill attained approximately 3-4 years

• In survey 29% of parents said 3 or older (28%=2 years, 23%=1 year, 20%=birth to 6 months)

Share and take turns with other children

• Skill attained approximately 3.5-4 years

• In survey 44% of parents said 3 or older (20%=2 years, 18%=1 year, 18%=birth to 6 months)

Resist desire to something forbidden

• Skill attained approximately 3.5-4 years

• In survey 58% of parents said 3 or older (18%=2 years, 24%=1 year or younger)

Control his/her emotions (e.g., tantrums when

frustrated)

Tuning In: Parents of Young Children Tell Us What They Think, Know and Need is a comprehensive research undertaking by ZERO TO THREE and the Bezos Family Foundation, 2016.

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Self-control: Infancy

Little emotional or behavioral control, rely almost

entirely on caregivers

Facial expression, non-verbal vocal expressions

(crying, screaming, laughing), physical movements

(stomping, kicking, hitting)

Physical comfort: touch, rocking, sucking,

holding

Developmental Expectations

Communication

Caregivers

Self-control: Toddlerhood

First year children are still mostly learning through physical interactions (non-verbal). They start to use more emotion language as they approach 2 years, which allows them to begin to verbalize their emotional states and needs.

Mostly non-verbal, but emerging language should be used to teach emotions. “You are stomping your feet. You

are mad.”

Still want physical comfort, physical reorienting

Developmental Expectations

Communication

Caregivers

MovieIn Brief: Early Childhood Mental Health

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L41k2p-YRCs

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Quick Write:

How does the information in the movie contribute to your thinking about challenging behaviors in toddlers?

Reflect:What is happening in the brain of the toddler?

Source: www.carriecontey.com

Parenting the Brain

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Challenging Behaviors:

Strategies to Prevent and Support Toddlers

Relationships as a Basis of Prevention• Foundation is having a relationship-based approach in child care settings (Fox &

Hemmeter, 2014)

- Nurturing and supportive relationships

- High quality supportive environments

- Culturally responsive practices

• Interventions focused on fostering sensitive and responsive teacher-child interactions for children who demonstrated challenging behaviors in child care associated improved activity in children’s stress response system (declines in cortisol) (Hatfield & Williford, 2016)

Strategy: Become Self-Aware and Gain PerspectiveWhat is the

child’s behavior bringing up for

me? What emotions am I feeling when this behavior happens?

Am I feeling this way because of my

own “stuff”?

Do I have reasonable expectations?

Do I always feel this way each day when

this behavior occurs?

Is there something about my family or culture that makes

me feel less tolerate?

Is my temperament

similar or different from

the child?

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Quick Write

• Write down behaviors children have demonstrated that cause you to feel frustrated? Angry? Exhausted?

“During the toddler years, our most reasonable expectation is the unreasonable. Expecting the madness makes it far easier to keep our cool.”

– Janet Landsbury, 2014

http://www.janetlansbury.com/2014/04/9-best-ways-to-stay-mostly-unruffled-with-toddlers/

Document and Observe to Learn

Daily Events Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday

• Drop off Mom drops off child Charlie takes the bus (stayed the night with this dad)

Mom drops off Mom drops off Charlie takes the bus (stayed the night with this dad)

• Breakfast Charlie eats oatmeal Charlie eats yogurt Charlie eats oatmeal Charlie eats cheerios Charlie eats eggs and cottage cheese

• Small group child led activities (e.g., puzzles)

Charlie goes to the quiet space looking at books.

Charlie chooses to play with Legos with Sam and Sara, Charlie bites Sara

Charlie plays with trains with Sam

Charlie plays with Legos with Sara

Charlie plays with cars with Sam and Sara. Charlie hits and bites Sara.

• Observation and documentation by more than one person- Completed at various times of the day on multiple days,

Example of a “Snap shot”: A Look at 2 year old Charlie’s Week. Mom and dad are recently separated.

• Identify when the behavior occurs• What happens before it occurs?• Who is in the environment? • When is it happening?

What does Charlie’s behavior tell us?

Biting

• Exploring cause and effect? • Need for autonomy?• Frustrated? • Anxious?• Tried?• Inability to express feelings

or needs verbally?• Not feeling safe on the bus?• Others?

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Strategy: Respond, Don’t React• Supportive child care provider and child relationships

• Shift toward responding rather than reacting

• Responses should be calm, direct, honest, non-punitive (Landsbury, 2012)

• If needed offer 2 or 3 choicesDo you want an apple, carrots, or string cheese for a snack?You may walk holding my hand or will carry you. What do you prefer?

Example: “I won’t let you hit. You are so upset that we have to leave the park and you want to play.”

Strategy: Connect and Redirect

Connect so that child feels “seen”-

accept and acknowledge

Then set boundary or problem-solve

Remain “unruffled”

Calm and consistent

Siegel, D.J. (2012) The Whole Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind.http://www.janetlansbury.com/2016/03/how-to-calm-an-angry-child/

Remain calm (not urgent or emotional), “You didn’t like that

you can’t throw toys at Elise. You feel like throwing things.

I’m here to stop you.”

Child Needs Time to Respond

• Provide enough time for children to respond

• Give the child 5 to 10 seconds to respond before you give an additional prompt or request.

• If the child is asked to respond verbally, he may need time to find the right words.

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Strategy: Create Child Care Environments that Prevent Challenging Behaviors

• Implementing classroom-wide practices can resolve many challenging behaviors (Dunlap et al., 2015)

• Environment supports engagement and minimizes disruption

• Transitions should be minimized and time spent in developmentally appropriate activities should be maximized- Plan a schedule with fewer times when children all transition at the same time

- Have more time spent in child-directed activities

Strategy: Create Child Care Environments that Prevent Challenging Behaviors

• Sufficient and uncluttered space for active play, a quite cozy spot for individual and quiet play

• Use mealtimes as an opportunity for discussion and interaction, an opportunity to foster responsive sensitive interactions and prevent challenging behaviors

“Daily routines are fundamental to high quality infant–toddler care and create abundant opportunity for teachers to engage in meaningful interactions that promote the learning and development of young children” (Hallam et al., 2016, pg. 52)

Research Says

• Balanced schedule of teacher & child led activities associated increased learning in preschool (Diamond et al.,

2013)

• Predictable, organized routines helps children regulate emotions (National Research Council, 2002)

Strategy: Mindfulness Practices• In my own work, emerging evidence of the benefits of integrating mindfulness practices in early childhood settings for toddlers

• Child care providers may also benefit, increasing their sensitivity, creativity, and identifying innovative ways to create their child care environments by using mindfulness practices (Capel, 2012)

Benefits of Mindfulness Practice for

Young Children

Improve focus and attention,

increase calmness

Improve self-regulation

(e.g., delay of gratification)

Improve motor/physical development

Increase ability to manage

social emotional behaviors

“There is an inherent challenge in describing what mindfulness is during the early years because young children are naturally mindful. Like adults, they may become distracted by the many demands for their attention in the environment. Even toddlers, who are known for their very short yet

developmentally appropriate attention spans, are genuinely focused on their immediate experience. Since young children – across all types of diversity – are naturally curious about their world in which they live, let us ponder how we can best support young children’s natural states of joy, wonder, and

engagement – or at the very least move out of the way so they can experience their world mindfully.” (Erwin & Robinson, 2016, pg. 287)

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Strategy: Using Picture Books to Label andExpress Emotions

• Teach children how to label and express emotions using picture books

• When children do not have the emotional vocabulary to communicate feelings picture books can be helpful (Lowe, 2009)

• Teachers use bilbilotherapy to promote positive attitudes when child is having challenges (Kramer & Smith, 2008)

Research Says

• Research finds that using picturebooks with three to five year olds in preschool and pre-k classrooms promotes social-emotional development (e.g., identify and label their own emotions) (Parmis, 2016)

Picture Books for Toddlers

Feelings

My Many Colored Days

- Dr. Suess

Lots of Feelings

- Shelly Rotner

Grumpy Bird

- Jeremy Tankard

Anger

Words Are Not for Hurting

– Elizabeth Verdickem

When I Feel Angry

- Cornelia Maude Spelman

Llama Mad at Mama

- Anna Dewdney

Self Control

Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus

- Mo Willems

Quiet Loud

- Linda Patricellei

No Yes

- Linda Patricellei

Source: https://www.zerotothree.org/resources/7-books-about-feelings-for-babies-and-toddlers

Strategy: Family Involvement• In a recent survey of parents of young children, 61% of moms and 50% of dads said

that, “figuring out the most effective way to discipline” is one of the biggest challenges and “managing my child when he/she misbehaves” is one of the top five challenges*

This is across economic and education segments

• Parents want support and strategies to parent challenging behaviorsRecent qualitative study found that parents of preschools prefer verbal communication that is accessible not during pick up or drop off, prefer workshops, practical, hands-on demonstrations, and want a support relationship with the teacher (Cummings, 2016).

• Engage full participation of parents in observation to ensure consistency across settings and meet the developmental expectations and goals (Knoche et al., 2012)

*

Katrina P. Cummings (2016): Supporting parent engagement in programme-wide behavioural intervention implementation, Early Child Development and Care, DOI:

10.1080/03004430.2016.1177042

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How to talk to parents/caregivers about the challenging behavior? Questions to Ask Parents

Do you have any ideas about why this behavior is happening?

When and where does your child’s challenging behavior happen, and what has typically happened before and after?

What is your infant’s or toddler’s challenging behavior like for you? How are you feeling about your child’s behavior?

Do you have any ideas about why this behavior is happening?

How do you think your child feels when he is engaging in this behavior?

How has the behavior affected your relationship with your child?

How have these changes affected your relationship with your child?

Have there been any changes at home that might help us understand how your child feels?

* Adapted from Watson & Hawley, 2010

Helpful Resources

Books and Articles

• Brazelton, T. B. (1992). Touchpoints: The essential reference. Reading, MA: Addison

• Landsbury, J. (2014). No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame.

• Landbury, J. (2014). Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting

• Liberman, A. (1993). Emotional life of the toddler. Washington, DC: Zero to Three.

• Sameroff, A. J., McDonough, S. C., & Rosenblum, K. L. (2003). Treating parent infant relationship problems: Strategies for intervention. Washington, DC: Zero to Three.

• Zeanah, C. H., (2000). Handbook of infant mental health (2nd ed.). Washington, DC: Zero to Three.

On the Web

• www.challengingbehavior.org Center for Evidence-Based Practice: Young Children with Challenging Behavior

• www.csefel.uiuc.edu Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning

• www.zerotothree.org Zero to Three

• www.ptic.org The Program for Infant Toddler Caregiver

• http://www.janetlansbury.com/ Janet Landsbury elevating child care

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Selected ReferencesCapel, C. (2012). Mindlessness/mindfulness, classroom practices and quality of early childhood education: An auto-ethnographic

and intrinsic case research. International Journal of Quality and Reliability Management, 29(6), 666–680.

Diamond, K. E., Justice, L. M., Siegler, R. S., & Snyder, P. A. (2013). Synthesis of IES research on early intervention and early childhood education (NCSER 2013-3001). U.S Department of Education. Retrieved from

http://ies.ed.gov/ncser/pubs/20133001/pdf/20133001.pdf

Erwin, E.J. & Robinson, K.A. (2016). The joy of being: making way for young children’s natural mindfulness. Early Child Development and Care, 186, 2, 268-286, DOI: 10.1080/03004430.2015.1029468.

Hallam, R. A., Fouts, H.N., Bargreen, K.N., & Perkins, K. (2016). Teacher-child interactions during mealtimes: Observations of toddlers in high subsidy child care settings. Early Childhood Education Journal, 44, 1, 51-59. doi:10.1007/s10643-014-0678-x

Knoche, L. L., Edwards, C. P., Sheridan, S. M., Kupzyk, K. A., Marvin, C. A., Cline, K. D., & Clarke, B. L. (2012). Getting Ready: Results of a randomized trial of a relationship-focused intervention on the parent-infant relationship in rural early head start. Infant Mental Health Journal, 33, 439–458.

Kramer, P. A., & Smith, G. G. (1998). Easing the pain of divorce through children's literature. Early Childhood Education Journal, 26, 2, 89-94.

Lowe, D. F. (2009). Helping children cope through literature. Forum on Public Policy Online, 1, 1-17.

Watson & Hawley (2010). Addressing Challenging Behaviors in Infants and Toddlers. Individualized Interventions Determining the Meaning of Behavior and Development Appropriate Responses. Retrieved from the web: http://www.cehd.umn.edu/ceed/publications/presentations/watson/Indiana_Session_2_41910CWVH.pdf.

Tuning In: Parents of Young Children Tell Us What They Think, Know and Need is a comprehensive research undertaking by ZERO TO THREE and the Bezos Family Foundation, 2016.