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Page 1: TUESDAY,M AY8, 2012 D5 Caregiving burdens sister-in-lawnyx.uky.edu/dips/xt7bk35m9w0k/data/70131_KY20120508D5NB.pdf · KY FEATURES | courier-journal.com/features THECOURIER-JOURNAL

THE COURIER-JOURNAL | TUESDAY, MAY 8, 2012 | D5FEATURES | courier-journal.com/featuresKY

GET MORE PUZZLES ONLINEYou’ll find more puzzles, comics, fun and

games at www.courier-journal.com/goofoff

WONDERWORD | David Ouellet

DAILY CROSSWORDAcross

1 Award sewnon a sash

6 Froth in a mug10 Frat party empties14 Assumed name15 Italian wine site16 Hacker’s cry of

success17 Comfortable

indoor setting20 Adjust for pitch21 Globetrotting

reporter Nellie22 Struggle23 Links “Heads up!”25 Out of __:

discordant26 “Wait, I’m not

done ...”33 Prepare for winter

takeoff34 Divisions of

history35 Actress Vardalos36 Serenade

accompaniment37 “Need __?”: “Hop

in!”39 Pablo Neruda

works40 Drive up the wall,

so to speak41 Rental car option42 Flavor enhancer43 Corporate

oversight group47 Sotto __: softly48 “Ah! Say no

more”

49 SpiritualistDeepak

52 Agt.’s cut53 Forest females57 Guesthouse where

one would enjoythe starts of thethree longestanswers

60 Persian Gulfprince

61 “House” actorEpps

62 Must, informally63 Ice Follies venue64 Virtual people, in

a popular gameseries

65 William Jennings__, three-timepresidentialcandidate

Down1 10-year-old

Simpson2 2000s Giants

manager Felipe3 Pop diva Celine4 Competitive

demeanor5 Approx. figure6 “Get thee to a

nunnery” speaker7 Catch a glimpse

of8 Broke bread9 Epithet never

actually used byCagney

10 Lowbrow trinkets

11 Aussiehatchlings

12 Young lady13 Dagger of yore18 Iberian river19 Family tree

members24 __-eyed jack25 Medieval tenant

farmer26 Wing it,

speechwise27 Surgical opening?28 “Iron Mike” of

football29 Crook’s caper30 Non-studio flick31 Family tree

member32 Neon and xenon,

for two37 Guacamole

makings

38 Biographicalspan

39 Selected41 Sew sequins on,

say42 Chicago-to-Miami

dir.44 KOA facility45 Kitchen cutters46 Netmen’s org.49 Trucker’s “good

buddy”50 Half: Pref.51 Norse god of war52 Bristol baby

buggy54 Like some

high-fiber cereal55 Señora’s “this”56 Jazzman Getz58 ASCAP

counterpart59 Cold War spy org.

YESTERDAY’S SOLUTION

Dear Annie: My sister-in-lawasked me to wipe her PC’s harddrive so she could donate it. Inthe process, I discovered an oldsuicide note she had written. Itdates back five years, which wasa time when I know she feltoverwhelmed caring for a dis-abled friend. In the note, it saysshe felt terribly burdened bythis unwanted responsibility.

My sister-in-law recentlymoved back home to take careof her father, who is aging but isotherwise in good health. I’mafraid she may get overwhelmedagain. What should I do?

— Help for My Brother’s WifeDear Wife: Any caregiver

can feel overwhelmed, and youwould not be breaking any confi-dences to offer assistance andsupport. Ask whether you couldshop for groceries or pick up aprescription. If Dad is healthyenough to be left alone, takeyour sister-in-law out for coffeeand conversation. If not, tell heryou’ll sit with Dad for an hour soshe can have a break. Talk to heroften. And make sure she hasthe contact information forresources such as the EldercareLocator (eldercare.gov) at 1-800-677-1116 and the National Family

Caregivers Association(nfcacares.org).

Dear Annie: Next monthwould have been my fourth anni-versary had I not moved out ofthe house I shared with my hus-band, who is 12 years my junior.

“John” and I have been in arelationship for almost 10 years,and I thought I knew him. Theproblem started soon after ourwedding, when I returned froman out-of-state trip and foundpictures he had taken of himself— naked, graphic and posingsuggestively with photos ofother men. John said he was justcurious about taking them anddenies ever posting the picturesonline. I thought we workedthrough it after many heartfeltdiscussions, but then six monthsago, I caught him surfing gayporn on my computer, as well aswatching it on TV.

He promised he would go to

counseling, and I gave him onelast chance, saying I would leavehim if he lied to me about itagain. In February, I ran a pro-file of the top five websites thathe visits — and they were allporn. I also discovered that hehas charged porn to his creditcard.

That was the last straw. Irented a house, and he finallyrealized that I was serious. Buthe doesn’t understand why Iwant out of the relationship. Hesays it’s “just porn” and refusescounseling.

Annie, I am a pretty, petite,youthful woman with a greatjob. I refuse to keep enablinghim. Should I stay with him eventhough I will never trust orrespect him again?

— Suicidal and AngryDear Angry: Trust and

respect are two importantaspects of a healthy marriage.If counseling does not help youregain those elements, we don’tsee a happy future for you.

ANNIE’SMAILBOX

Kathy MitchellMarcy Sugar

Caregiving burdens sister-in-law

SUDOKU

© Tribune Media Services

YESTERDAY’S SOLUTION How do I play?

The goal is towrite the numbersin the boxes tosatisfy only onecondition: eachrow, column and3 by 3 box mustcontain the digits1 through 9 exact-ly once. Whatcould be simpler?There is only onesolution.

The legendarycellist PabloCasals wasasked why hecontinued topractice at age90.

“Because Ithink I’m mak-ing progress,” hereplied.

Winning play-ers never stophoning theirtechnique. Theyknow they canlearn from everydeal. Today’sdeclarer ruffedthe third dia-mond and wasn’twilling to rely on

the spade finesse; he went after dummy’sclubs. To preserve a needed entry, Southled a club and ducked in dummy.

East won and led a spade, and South putup his king. He led a club to the ace, ruffeda club, led a trump to the king and ruffed aclub. South then drew trumps and went tothe ace of spades to pitch his spade loseron the good club.

South’s technique was good. If he drawstrumps or takes the ace of clubs too soon,or finesses with the jack of spades at TrickFive, his chances decline.

West had something to learn also. Therewas no rush for him to cash diamondtricks. West can give South a harder task ifhe leads a trump at the second or thirdtrick.

© Tribune Media Services

BRIDGE | Frank Stewart

Good techniqueJUMBLE

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar are long-time editors of the Ann Landers column.Email questions [email protected], or write to:Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190,Chicago, IL 60611.

© Creators Syndicate

9 a.m. (CBS) An-derson “The Truth BehindDeception.” (New)

9:00 (FOX) LIVE! WithKelly NFL broadcasterMichael Strahan co-hosts.(N)

11:00 (ABC) The ViewSinger and actor RickyMartin; musical perfor-mance by “Evita” cast. (N)

1 p.m. (MY) Maury “IsMy Fiance a Pimp andCheating on Me? TestHim!” (N)

2:00 (CBS) The Talk

Singers Courtney Love andLinda Perry; Carnie Wilsonco-hosts. (N)

3:00 (CBS) The NateBerkus Show “NateSurprises One of His De-serving Crew Members.”(N)

3:00 (NBC) The Dr. OzShow “The Biggest HealthMyths You Believe ... Ex-posed!” (N)

4:00 (NBC) The EllenDeGeneres Show ActorsJohnny Depp, MichellePfeiffer and Chloe Moretz;

actress Alison Sweeny;musical guest Flo Rida. (N)

6:00 (WKYI) TheWendy Williams ShowTV host Carrie Keagan;viewer gets the chance towin $5,000. (N)

11:00 (TBS) ConanJournalist Piers Morgan;actor Ben Falcone; musicartist Ed Sheeran performs.(N)

11:35 (CBS) Late ShowWith David LettermanActor Jim Parsons; musicalguest Macy Gray. (N)

11:35 (NBC) The To-night Show With Jay

Leno Former U.S. Sen. RickSantorum; actor TaylorKitsch; musical guests B.o.B.and O.A.R. (N)

12:30 a.m. (KET2)Tavis Smiley PsychologistJonathan Haidt; MicrosoftVice President AnthonySalcito.

12:37 (CBS) The LateLate Show With CraigFerguson TV judge StevenTyler. (N)

12:37 (NBC) LateNight With Jimmy FallonActress Cameron Diaz;Olympic swimmer MichaelPhelps. (N)

TODAY’S TV TALK

Gemini’sspecial day

Dear IncredibleInman: Years ago, I sawa very funny movieabout a young man. Helived in a middle-classEast Coast neighbor-hood, and he was ner-vous about coming outto his parents. Can youtell me the title and ifit’s on DVD? — F.D., viaemail

Dear F.D.: Soundslike the 1980 film “Hap-py Birthday, Gemini,”based on an off-Broad-

way play. The cast in-cludes Madeline Kahn,Rita Moreno, Alan Ro-senberg and David Mar-shall Grant.

It’s not on DVD — itwas on video, but is nowout of print.

Freelance writer DavidInman’s column appearsdaily. Email him at [email protected] include your home-town. Questions of generalinterest will be answered;personal replies are notpossible.

THE INCREDIBLE INMANDavid Inman

TV TONIGHT8 PM 8:30 9 PM 9:30 10 PM 10:30

BR

OA

DC

AST

ABC WHAS11 E$ Last Man Cougar Dancing Stars (N) Private Practice (N)

CBS WLKY32 E% NCIS (N) NCIS: Los Angeles Unforgettable (N)

CW WBKI34 E& 90210 (N) The L.A. Complex News (N) Inside (N)

FOX WDRB41 E( Glee (N) New Girl New Girl WDRB News Sports

ION WBNA21 E21 Criminal Minds Criminal Minds Flashpoint

KET1 WKPC15 E13 Jubilee “Wildfire” APPALACHIA Frontline

KET2 WKMJ68 E15 American Experience “Abraham & Mary” World Peace

MY WMYO58 E10 Cold Case “Hearts” Cold Case Office King

NBC WAVE03 E^ Fashion Star (N) The Voice “Live Finale” Winner crowned. (N)

WKYI Gunn (N) Gunn Frasier Frasier Cold Case Files

SPO

RT

S

ESPN E31 Sports NFL Live Baseball Tonight

ESPN2 E30 30 for 30 “The Two Escobars” NFL Live

FSN-OHIO E55 MLB Baseball: Cincinnati vs Milwaukee (Live)

FSNS E70 Playoffs: Boston vs Atlanta (Live) Hawks Live Game 365

GOLF E69 19th Hole PGA Tour Live from The PLAYERS

NE

WS CNBC E39 Human Trafficking 60 Minutes 60 Minutes (N)

CNN E34 Cooper 360° (N) Piers Tonight (N) Cooper 360°

FNC E44 The O’Reilly Factor Hannity (N) On the Record (N)

MSNBC E45 The Ed Show (N) Rachel Maddow (N) Last Word (N)

FAM

ILY

ANPL E60 Frozen Planet Frozen Planet Frozen Planet

DISC E38 Deadliest Catch Deadliest Catch (N) The Devils Ride (N)

DISN E29 Phineas Hannah Montana (‘09) (G) Video Jessie

FAM E40 Uptown A Walk to Remember (‘02) Shane West. (PG)

FOOD E46 Cupcake Wars Chopped Chopped (N)

HGTV E51 Home (N) Million White Room (N) Hunters Hunters

HIST E54 Pawn Stars Pawn Stars Swamp People United Stats of (N)

HUB Transform Goosebmp Sabrina Facts Life Mork Happy Days

NICK E42 ‘70s ‘70s Lopez Lopez Friends Friends

TLC E50 My Collection Strongest Toddler The Little The Little

TRAV E61 Mysteries Mysteries (N) Off Limits (N)

VA

RIE

TY

A&E E36 Storage Storage Storage Storage Storage Storage

BET E49 Let’s Stay Let’s Stay Game Game Game (N) Let’s Stay

BRAV E32 Housewife (N) Housewife (N) (:01)Housewife

CART E52 Level Up Adventure King King Dad Dad

CMT E66 Extreme (:27)aaaNationalLampoon’sVacation(‘83)(R)

COM E59 Workaholic South Prk Tosh.0 Tosh.0 Tosh.0 Tosh.0

E! E56 E! Spec. Khloe E! Ent. Special E! Ent. Special

FAITH E19 Mother Angelica Turning Turning 19 Presents

FX E28 Dear John Channing Tatum. (PG-13) aaDear John (‘10)

HALL E68 Prairie (TV G) Prairie (TV G) Frasier Frasier

LIFE E35 Dance Moms Miam Dance Moms Miam Dance Moms (N)

MTV E37 Ridiculous Ridiculous 16 and Pregnant 16 and Pregnant (N)

OXYG aa Sweet Home (‘02) Best Ink Best Ink (N)

SPIKE E41 1000 Ways 1000 Ways to Die 1000 Ways Repo Games Repo Games

SYFY E64 Paranormal Files Fact or Faked (N) Dream Machines (N)

TBS E27 Big Bang Big Bang Big Bang Big Bang Big Bang Big Bang

TNT E43 2012 NBA Playoffs (Live) 2012 NBA Playoffs (Live)

TRUTV E53 Pawn Pawn Pawn Pawn (N) Pawn Pawn

TVLD E65 Home Home Raymond Raymond Raymond Raymond

TVONE E24 Martin Martin Martin Martin Martin Martin

UNIV E67 (7:00)Unafamilia Abismo de pasión No amar

USA E33 SVU “Painless” Law & Order: SVU SVU “Silence”

VH1 E47 New Orleans New Orleans New Orleans

WGN E20 MLB Baseball: Atlanta Braves at Chicago Cubs (Live)

MO

VIE

AMC E26 Die Hard (‘88) Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman. A lone hero. (R)

ENC The Secret of My Success (PG-13) aaa Secretaria (‘10)

FMC aa Jump Presents aa Fantastic 4 II (‘07) (PG) Presents

TCM aaa The Roaring Twenties (‘39) (NR) AFI Master Class (N)

PR

EM

IUM

HBO E17aaOne Day (‘11) Anne Hathaway, Jim Sturgess.Relationship. (PG-13)

24/7 Veep“Catherine”

MAX Sucker Punch (‘11) Emily Browning, Abbie Cornish.Escaping asylum. (PG-13)

Terminator 2: JudgmentDay (R)

SHOW E16The Borgias “The Choice”Allegiance.

The Big CFaith.

Nurse Jackie The Borgias “The Choice”Allegiance.

STARZ Magic City “Atonement” (:55)MagicCity“SuicideBlonde”

Grown Ups Adam Sandler.(PG-13)

TMC aaa The Hours (‘02) Meryl Streep, Julianne Moore. Bookconnects lives. (PG-13)

The Lucky Ones TimRobbins. (R)

Movies

Time: 05-07-2012 17:47 User: mstockwell PubDate: 05-08-2012 Zone: KY Edition: 1 Page Name: D 5 Color: CyanMagentaYellowBlack