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La conciencia de la mestizo1/Towards a New ConsciousnessGLORIA ANZALDUA

When Gloria Anzaldua speaks of a "new consciousness," she's talking about creating a new self, about expe riencing the world in a different way. She envisions a cultural evolution bringing new understandings of race, gender, class , and nationality. And in writing of themes t iza consciousness and the mu ltiple cultures from w hich it arises, sheuses a new language a hybrid of English, Castilian Spanish, a NorthMexican dialect, Tex-Me x, and the Indian language Nahuatl. Anzalduais editor of H a c i e n d o C a r a s : M a k i n g F a c e / M a k i n g S o u l (1990) andcoeditor of Th is B ridg e C al l ed My B ack : W rit ing s b y Radica l W omen ofC o l o r (1983). This selection is from her book B o r d e r l a n d s = L a F r o n t -era : Th e N ew Mes t iza (1987). Although we've provided translations, wesuggest that you no t consult these in your first reading. Concentrateinstead on Anzaldua's main po ints and on her innovative blend ofargumen t and poetry, of myth and manifesto.

For la mujer de mi razahablard el espiritu.2J o s e V as cocel os , Mex ican p h i l os o p h er, env is ag ed una raza mestiza,una mezcla de razas afines, una raza de color la primera raza sintesisdel globo.3 He ca l l ed i t a cos mic race, la raza cdsmica, a fif th ra cee m b r a c i n g t h e fo u r m a j o r r a c e s o f t h e w o r l d .4 O p p os i te to th e th eory oft h e pu r e A r y a n ,5 a n d t o t h e p o l i c y o f r a c i a l p u r i t y t h a t w h i t e A m e r i cap ract i ces , h is th eory is o ne of incl us iv i ty . At th e conf l uence of tw o o r

more g enet ic s t reams , w ith ch romos omes cons tant l y " cros s ing ov er, "th is mix ture of races , ra th er th an res ul t ing in an inf er ior b e ing , p rov ides

'L a conciencia de la mestiza: mestiza consciousness; consciousness of the mestiza (awo ma n of mi x ed rac i a l h er i ta g e) .

2This i s my own "tak e off" on J os e Vas c onc el os ' i d ea. J os e Vas c onc el os , La RazaCdsmica: Mision dela Raza Ibero-Americana (M ex i co: Ag u i l ar S.A. de Edicio nes, 1961).[A uth or 's note] for la mujer de mi raza . . .: the spirit shall speak through the women ofm y r a c e .

3una raza mestiza . . .: a mul t i r ac i a l r ac e, a mi x ture of k i nd red rac es , a r ac e of c o l or ,the first synthetic race of the world.

4Vas c onc el os . [Au th or 's note]5the theory of the pure Aryan: th e my th espoused by Adolf Hitler and others of therac i a l s up er i or i ty of wh i te nor th ern Eu rop ea ns .

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h y b rid p rog eny , a mutab l e , more mal l eab l e s p ecies w ith a r ich g enep o o l . F r o m t h i s r a c i a l , i d e o l o g i c a l , c u l t u r a l , a n d b i o l o g i c a l c r o s s -p ol l in iza t io n, an " a l i en" cons cious ness is p res entl y in th e mak ing ane w mestiza cons cious nes s , una conciencia de mujer.6 I t is a cons cious nes s of th e B o rderl a nds .Una lucha defronteras /A S t r u g g l e o f B o r d e r s

Because I, a mestiza,continually walk ou t of one cultureand into another,because I am in all cultures at the same time,alma entre dos mundos, tres, cuatro,me zumba la cabeza con lo contradictorio.Estoy norteada portodas las voces que me hablansimultdneamente.7

Th e amb iv al ence f rom th e cl as h of v o ices res ul ts in menta l andemot ional s ta tes of p erp l ex i ty . I nternal s t r i f e res ul ts in ins ecur i ty andindecis iveness . Th e mes t iza 's dua l o r mu l t ip l e p ers o nal i ty is p l ag u ed b ypsychic restlessness.I n a c o n s t a n t s ta t e o f m e n ta l n e p a n t i l i s m , a n A z t ec w o r d m e a n i n gtorn b etw een w ay s , la mestiza i s a p rod uc t of th e t rans f er of th e cu l tura la n d s p i r i t u a l v a l u e s o f o n e g r o u p t o a n o t h e r . B e i n g t r i c u l t u r a l , m o n o l i n g u a l , b i l i n g u a l , o r m u l t i l i n g u a l , s p e a k i n g a p a t o i s , 8 a n d i n a s t a t e o fp e r pe t u a l t r a n s i t i o n , t h e mestiza f aces th e d i l emma of th e mix ed b reed:w h ich col l ect iv i ty does th e daug h ter of a dark s k inned moth er l is ten to?El choque de un alma aimpado entre el mundo del espiritu y elmun do de la tecnica a veces la deja entullad a.Q C r a d l e d i n o n e c u l t u r e ,s andw ich ed b etw een tw o cul tures , s t raddl ing a l l th ree cul tures and th e irvalue systems, la mestiza underg oes a s t rug g l e of f l es h , a s t rug g l e ofb orders , an in ner w ar. Lik e a l l p eop l e , w e p erce iv e th e v ersion of rea l i tyt h a t o u r c u l t u r e c o m m u n i c a t e s . L i k e o t h e r s h a v i n g o r l i v i n g i n m o r e

th an one cul ture , w e g et mul t ip l e , of ten op p os ing mes s ag es . Th e comingtog eth er of tw o s el f -cons is tent b ut h ab i tua l l y incomp at ib l e f rames ofreference 10 caus es un choque, a c u l t u r a l c o l l i si o n .euna conciencia de mujer: a female consciousness.1alma entre dos mundos . . ..- a soul c aug h t b etween two , th ree, four wo r l d s . M y

head ac h es wi th c ontrad i c t i o ns . I 'm led nor th b y a l l th e vo i c es th at s p eak to me s i mul taneously.

^patois: n o n s t a n d a r d d i a l e c t .9Z choque de una alma atrapado . . .: Th e s trug g l e of a soul t r a p p ed b etween th eworl d of th e s p i r i t an d th e wo r l d of tec hnol og y s o met i mes l eaves i t p a ral y zed .10Arthur Koestler termed th i s "b i s oc i a t i o n." Al b er t Roth enb erg , The Creative Pro

cess in Art, Science, and Other Fields ( C h i c a g o , IL : U ni vers i ty of Ch i c ag o Pres s , 19 79 ) ,12. [Au th or 's note]

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W i t h i n u s a n d w i t h i n la cultura chicana, 11 c o m m o n l y he l d be l ie fs o ft h e w h i t e c u l t u r e a t t a c k commonly he l d be l ie fs o f t he Me xic a n c u l t u re ,a n d b o t h a t t a c k c o m m o n l y h e l d b e l i e f s o f t h e i n d i g e n o u s c u l t u r e . S u b c o n sc io u sl y, we se e a n a t t a c k o n o u rse l ve s a n d o u r be l ie fs a s a t hre a t a n dw e a t t e m p t t o b l o c k w i t h a c o u n t e r s t a n c e .B u t i t i s n o t e n o u g h t o s t a n d o n t h e o p p o s i t e r i v e r b a n k , s h o u t i n gq u e s t i o n s , c h a l l e n g i n g p a t r i a r c h a l , w h i t e c o n v e n t i o n s . A counterstancel o c ks o n e in t o a d u e l o f o pp re sso r a n d o ppre sse d ; l o c ke d in m o rt a lc o m b a t , l i k e t h e c o p a n d t h e c r i m i n a l , b o t h a r e r e d u c e d t o a c o m m o nd e n o m i n a t o r o f v i o l e n c e . T h e c o u n t e r s t a n c e r e f u t e s t h e d o m i n a n t c u l t u re ' s v ie ws a n d be l ie fs , a n d , fo r t h is , i t i s pro u d l y d e f i a n t . A l l re a c t io nis l im i t e d by, a n d d e p e n d e n t o n , wha t i t i s re a c t i n g a ga in st . Be c a u se t hec o u n t e r s ta n c e s t e m s f r o m a p r o b l e m w i t h a u t h o r i t y o u t e r a s w e ll asi n n e r i t' s a st e p t o w a r d s l i b e r a t i o n f r o m c u l t u r a l d o m i n a t i o n . Bu t i t i sn o t a w a y o f l i f e . A t s o m e p o i n t , o n o u r w a y t o a n e w c o n s c i o u s n e s s, w ewil l ha ve t o l e a ve t he o ppo s i t e ba n k, t he spl i t be t we e n t he t wo m o rt a lc o m b a t a n t s s o m e h o w h e a l e d s o t h a t w e a r e o n b o t h s h o r e s a t o n c e a n d,a t o n c e , se e t hro u gh se rpe n t a n d e a gl e e ye s. 12 Or pe rha ps we wi l l d e c id et o d ise n ga ge fro m t h e d o m in a n t c u l t u re , wr i t e i t o ff a l t o ge t he r a s a lo stc a u s e , a n d c r o s s t h e b o r d e r i n t o a w h o l l y n e w a n d s e p a r a t e t e r r i t o r y . O rw e m i g h t g o a n o t h e r r o u t e . T h e p o s s i b i li t i es a r e n u m e r o u s o n c e w ed e c i de to a c t a n d n o t r e a c t .A T o l e r a n c e f o r A m b i g u i t y

T h e s e n u m e r o u s p o s s i b i l i t i e s l e a v e la mestiza f l o u n d e r i n g i n u n c h a r t e d s e a s . I n p e r c e i v i n g c o n f l i c t i n g i n f o r m a t i o n a n d p o i n t s o f v i e w ,she i s su b j e c t e d t o a swa m pi n g o f he r psyc ho l o gic a l b o rd e rs . S he ha sd isc o ve re d t ha t she c a n ' t ho l d c o n c e pt s o r id e a s in r ig id bo u n d a r ie s . T heb o r d e r s a n d w a l l s t h a t a r e s u p p o s e d t o k e e p t h e u n d e s i r a b l e i d e a s o u ta r e e n t r e n c h e d h a b i t s a n d p a t t e r n s o f b e h a v i o r ; t h e s e h a b i t s a n d p a t t e rn s a r e t h e e n e m y w i t h i n . R i g i d i t y m e a n s d e a t h . O n l y b y r e m a i n i n gfl exibl e i s she a b l e t o s t re t c h t he p syc he 13 h o r i z o n t a l l y a n d v e r t i c a ll y . Lamestiza c o n s t a n t l y h a s t o s hi f t o u t o f h a b i t u a l f o r m a t i o n s ; f r o m c o n v e r g e n t t h i n k i n g , a n a l y t i c a l r e a s o n i n g t h a t t e n d s t o u s e r a t i o n a l i t y t om o ve t o wa rd a s in gl e go a l (a W e st e rn m o d e ) , t o d ive rge n t t h in kin g, 14

^la cultura chicana: c h i c ana c ul ture, El s ewh ere i n Borderlands, Anzaldiia writes,"La Cultura chicana i d ent i f i es wi th th e moth er ( Ind i an) r a th er th an wi th th e fa th er(Sp ani s h ) . Our fa i th i s roo ted i n i nd i g eno us a t t r i b u tes , i mag es , sy mb ol s , mag i c , andm y t h " ( C h a p t e r 3 ) .

12see through serpent and eagle eyes: "Th e ea g l e sy mb ol i zes th e s p i r i t ( as th e s un, th efath er ) ; th e s erp ent s y mb ol i zes th e s oul (as th e ear th , th e moth er ) . Tog eth er , th ey s y mb ol i ze th e s trug g l e b etween th e spiritual/celestial/male a n d t h e u n d e r w o r l d / e a r t h / f e m i n i n e "(Borderlands, C h a p t e r 1 ) .

^ihe psyche: t h e so u l o r self.14In p ar t , I d er i ve my d ef i n i t i ons for "c onverg ent" and "d i verg ent" th i nk i ng f romR o t h e n b e r g , 1 2 - 1 3 . [ A u t h o r ' s n o t e ]

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c h a r a c t e r i z e d b y m o v e m e n t a w a y f r o m s e t p a t t e r n s a n d g o a l s a n dt o w a r d a m o r e w h o l e p e rs p e c ti v e , o n e t h a t i n c l u d e s r a t h e r t h a n e x c l u d e s.T h e n e w mestiza c o p e s b y d e v e l o p i n g a t o l e r a n c e f o r c o n t r a d i c t i o n s , a t o l e r a n c e f o r a m b i g u i t y . S h e l e a r n s t o b e a n I n d i a n i n M e x i c a nc u l t u r e , t o b e M e x i c a n f ro m a n A n g l o p o i n t o f v i e w . Sh e le a r n s t o j u g gl e c u l t u re s. S he ha s a pl u ra l pe rso n a l i t y, she o pe ra t e s in a pl u ra l i s t icm o d e n o t h i n g i s t h r u s t o u t , t h e g o o d t h e b a d a n d t h e u g l y, n o t h i n gr e j e c t e d , n o t h i n g a b a n d o n e d . N o t o n l y d o e s s h e s u s t a i n c o n t r a d i c t i o n s ,

she t u rn s t he a m biva l e n c e in to so m e t hin g e l se .S he c a n be j a r re d o u t o f a m biva l e n c e by a n in t e n se , a n d o f t e npa in fu l , e m o t io n a l e ve n t whic h in ve rt s o r re so l ve s t he a m biva l e n c e . I ' mn o t s u r e e x a c t l y h o w . T h e w o r k t a k e s p l a c e u n d e r g r o u n d s u b c o n sc i o u s l y. I t i s w o r k t h a t t h e s o u l p e r f o r m s . T h a t f o c a l p o i n t o rf u l c r u m , t h a t j u n c t u r e w h e r e t h e mestiza s t a n d s , i s w h e r e p h e n o m e n at e n d t o c o l l id e . I t i s whe re t he po ss ib i l i t y o f u n i t in g a l l t ha t i s se pa ra t eo c c u rs . T his a sse m bl y i s n o t o n e whe re se ve re d o r se pa ra t e d p ie c e sm e re l y c o m e t o ge t he r . No r i s i t a balancing o f o p p o s i n g p o w e r s . I na t t e m pt in g t o wo rk o u t a syn t he s is , t he se l f ha s a d d e d a t h i rd e l e m e n twhic h i s gre a t e r t ha n t he su m o f i t s se ve re d pa r t s . T ha t t h i rd e l e m e n t i sa n e w c o n sc io u sn e ss a mestiza c o n s c i o u s n e s s a n d t h o u g h i t i s aso u rc e o f in t e nse pa i n , i t s e n e rgy c o m e s fro m c o n t in u a l c re a t ive m o t io nt h a t k e e p s b r e a k i n g d o w n t h e u n i t a r y a s p e c t o f e a c h n ew p a r a d i g m .

En unas pocas centurias, iS t h e f u t u r e w i l l b e l o n g t o t h e mestiza. 10B e c a u s e t h e f u t u r e d e p e n d s o n t h e b r e a k i n g d o w n o f t h e p a r a d i g m s , i td e pe n d s o n t he s t ra d d l in g o f t wo o r m o re c u l t u re s. By c re a t in g a n e wmythos t ha t i s , a c ha n ge in t he wa y we pe rc e ive re a l i t y, t he wa y wese e o u rse l ve s, a n d t he wa ys we be ha ve la mestiza c re a t e s a n e wc o n sc io u sn e ss.T h e w o r k o f mestiza c o n sc io u sn e ss i s t o bre a k d o wn t he su bj e c t -o bj e c t d u a l i t y t ha t ke e ps he r a pr iso n e r a n d t o sho w in t he f l e sh a n dt h r o u g h t h e i m a g e s i n h e r w o r k h o w d u a l i t y i s t r a n s c e n d e d . T h e a n s w e r

t o t he pro bl e m be t we e n t he whi t e ra c e a n d t he c o l o re d , be t we e n m a l e sa n d fe m a l e s, l ie s in he a l in g t he spl i t t ha t o r ig in a t e s in t he ve ry f o u n d a t i o n o f o u r li v es , o u r c u l t u r e , o u r l a n g u a g e s , o u r t h o u g h t s . A m a s s i veu p r o o t i n g o f d u a l i s t i c t h i n k i n g i n t h e i n d i v i d u a l a n d c o l l e c t i v e c o n s ci o u s n es s i s t h e b e g i n n i n g o f a l o n g s t r u g g l e , b u t o n e t h a t c o u l d , i n o u rbe st ho pe s, br in g u s t o the e n d o f r a p e , o f v io l e n c e , o f wa r . . . .El camino de la mestizaT h e M e s ti z a W a y

C a u g h t b e t w e e n th e s u d d e n c o n t r a c t i o n , t h e b r e a t h s u c k e d i n a n d t h ee n d l e s s s p a c e , t h e b r o w n w o m a n s t a n d s s t i l l , l o o k s a t t h e s ky . S h e

^En unas pocas centurias: i n a few c entur i es .

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decides to go down, digging her way along the roots of trees. Siftingthrough the bones, she shakes them to see if there is any marrow inthem. Then, touching the dirt to her forehead, to her tongue, she takesa few bones, leaves the rest in their burial place.She goes through her backpack, keeps her journal and address book,throws away the muni-bart metromaps. 16 The coins are heavy andthey go next, then the greenbacks flutter through the air. She keeps herknife, can opener, and eyebrow pencil. She puts bones, pieces of bark,hierba.1, 11 eagle feather, snakeskin, tape recorder, the rattle and drumin her pack and she sets out to become the complete tolteca.

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H e r f i rs t s t e p i s t o t a ke in ve n t o ry. Despojando, desgranando, qui-tando paja.19 Ju st wha t d id she in he r i t f ro m he r a n c e st o rs? T his we ighto n h e r b a c k w h i c h i s t h e b a g g a g e f r o m t h e I n d i a n m o t h e r , w h i c h t h eb a g g a g e f ro m t h e S p a n i s h fa t h e r , w h i c h t h e b a g g a g e f ro m t h e A n g lo ?Pero es difiicil20 d iffe re n t i a t in g be t we e n lo heredado, lo ad quirido,lo impuesto.21 S he pu t s h is t o ry t hro u gh a s ie ve , win n o ws o u t t he l ie s ,l o o ks a t t he fo rc e s t ha t we a s a r a c e , a s wo m e n , ha ve be e n a pa r t o f .

Luego bota lo que no vale, los desmientos, los desencuentos, el embrut-ecimiento. Aguarda el juicio, Hondo y enraizado, de la gente antigua. 22T hi s s t e p is a c o n sc io u s ru pt u re wi t h a l l o ppre ss ive t ra d i t io n s o f a l lc u l t u r e s a n d r e l i g i o n s . S h e c o m m u n i c a t e s t h a t r u p t u r e , d o c u m e n t s th est ru ggl e . S he re in t e rpre t s h is t o ry a n d , u s in g n e w sym bo l s , she sha pe sn e w m yt hs. S he a d o pt s n e w pe rspe c t ive s t o wa rd t he d a rkskin n e d , wo m e n , a n d q u e e rs , S he s t re n gt he n s he r t o l e ra n c e (a n d in t o l e ra n c e ) fo ra m b i g u i t y . S h e i s w i l li n g t o s h a r e , t o m a k e herself vu l n e ra bl e t o fo re ignwa ys o f se e in g a n d t h i n kin g . S he su rre n d e rs a l l n o t io n s o f sa fe ty, o f t hef a m i l i a r . D e c o n s t r u c t , c o n s t r u c t . S he b e c o m e s a nahual,23 a b l e t o t r a n s fo rm he rse l f in t o a t re e , a c o yo t e , in t o a n o t he r pe rso n . S he l e a rn s tot r a n s f o r m t h e s m a l l " I " i n t o t h e t o t a l Self. Se hace moldeadora de sualma. Segrin laconcepcion que tiene de si misma, asiserd.2i

lsmuni-bart metromaps: map s of b us and ra i l t r ans p or tat i on i n th e San F ranc i s c oB a y a r e a .^hierbas: h erb s .18 Gina Val d es , Puentes y Fronteras: Coplas Chicanas (Los Ang el es , CA: Ca s t leL i t h o g r a p h , 1 9 8 2 ) , 2 . [A u t h o r ' s n o t e ] tolteca: th e Tol tec emp i re p red ates th e Aztec i nanc i ent M ex i c o. Anza l d i i a as s oc i a tes th e Tol tec s wi th mo re wo man -c entered c ul ture andrel i g i on th an th os e of th e wa r l i k e, p atr i a rc h a l Aztec s .^Despojando, desgranando, quitando paja: Str i p p i ng , removi ng th e g ra i n or th es traw.20Pero es dificil: B ut i t i s d i f f i c u l t .

2llo heredado, lo adquirido, lo impuesto: th e i nh er i ted , th e ac qu i red , th e imposed.22Luego hota lo que no vale . . .; Then she discards whatever is useless, falsehoods

a n d b r u t a l i t y . S h e w a i t s f o r t h e d e e p , p r o b i n g co m m o n sense of th e anc i ent p eop l e.^nahuals sorceress.24Se hace moldeadora . . . . Sh e i s ab l e to mol d h er s oul . Wh atever i mag e s h e h as of

herself, s o s h e wi l l b e.

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Que no se nos olvide los hombres 25"Tu no sirves pa'nada 26 you're good for nothing.Erespuravieja."21"Y o u ' re n o t hin g bu t a wo m a n " m e a n s yo u a re d e fe c t ive . I t s o ppo s i t eis t o be un macho. T h e m o d e r n m e a n i n g o f t h e w o r d " m a c h i s m o , " a swe ll a s t he c o n c e pt , i s a c t u a l l y a n A n gl o in ve n t io n . Fo r m e n l ike m yfa t he r , be in g "m a c ho " m e a n t be in g s t ro n g e n o u gh t o pro t e c t a n d su p

p o r t m y m o t h e r a n d u s , ye t b e i ng a b l e t o s h o w l o v e . T o d a y ' s m a c h o h a sd o u bt s a bo u t h is a b i l i t y t o fe e d a n d pro t e c t h is fa m i l y. H is "m a c hism o "is a n a d a p t a t io n t o o ppre ss io n a n d po ve rt y a n d l o w se l f- e ste e m . I t i s t her e su l t o f h i e r a r c h i ca l m a l e d o m i n a n c e . T h e A n g l o , f ee li n g i n a d e q u a t eand inferior and powerless, displaces or transfers these feel ings to theC h i c a n o b y s h a m i n g h i m . I n t h e G r i n g o 28 w o r l d , t h e Chicano suffersfrom excessive hu mi l ity a nd self-effacement, sha me of self and self-d e p r ec a t i o n . A r o u n d L a t i n o s h e s u f fe rs f r o m a s e ns e o f l a n g u a g e i n a d e q u a c y a n d i ts a c c o m p a n y i n g d i s co m f o r t ; w i t h N a t i ve A m e r i c a n s hes u ff er s fr o m a r a c i a l a m n e s i a w h i c h i g n o r e s o u r c o m m o n b l o o d , a n dfro m gu i l t be c a u se t he S pa n ish pa r t o f h im t o o k t he i r l a n d a n d o ppre sse d t he m . H e ha s a n e xc e ss ive c o m pe n sa t o ry hu br is 20 w h e n a r o u n dMe xic a n s f ro m t he o t he r s id e . I t o ve r l a ys a d e e p se n se o f r a c i a l sh a m e .T he l o ss o f a se n se o f d ign i t y a n d re spe c t in t he m a c ho bre e d s afa l se m a c hism o whic h l e a d s h im t o pu t d o wn wo m e n a n d e ve n t obru t a l iz e t he m . Co e xist in g wi t h h is se xist be ha vio r i s a l o ve fo r t hem o t he r whic h t a ke s pre c e d e n c e o ve r t ha t o f a l l o t he rs . De vo t e d so n ,m a c ho p ig. T o wa sh d o wn t he sha m e o f h is a c t s , o f h is ve ry be in g, a n dt o ha n d l e t he bru t e in t he m irro r , he t a ke s t o t he bo t t l e , t he sn o r t , t heneedle, and the fist.T h o u g h w e " u n d e r s t a n d " t h e r o o t c a u s e s o f m a l e h a t r e d a n d f e a r ,a n d t h e s u b s e q u e n t w o u n d i n g o f w o m e n , w e d o n o t e x c u s e , w e d o n o t

c o n d o n e , a n d we wi l l n o l o n ge r pu t u p wi t h i t . Fro m t he m e n o f o u rra c e , w e de m a n d t h e a d m i s s i o n / a c k n o w l e d g m e n t/ d i s c lo s u r e / te s t i m o n yt h a t t h e y w o u n d u s , v i o l a t e u s , a r e a f r a i d o f u s a n d o f o u r p o w e r . W en e e d t he m t o sa y t he y wi l l be gin t o e l im in a t e t he i r hu r t fu l pu t - d o wnw a y s . B u t m o r e t h a n t h e w o r d s , w e d e m a n d a c t s . W e s a y t o t h e m : W ewil l d e ve l o p e q u a l po we r wi t h yo u a n d t ho se who ha ve sha m e d u s .I t i s im pe ra t ive t ha t mestizos s u p p o r t e a c h o t h e r i n c h a n g i n g t h e25Que no se nos olvide los hombres: Let us not forg et men.26 T no sirves pa' nada: Y ou're g ood for noth i ng .27Eres pura vieja: Y o u ' r e n o t h i n g b u t a w o m a n .28 Gringe>: Anglo .2hubris: ex ag g erated p r i d e o r s el f-c onf i d ence.

15

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sexist elements in the Mexican-Indian c u l t u r e . A s l o n g a s w o m a n i s p u td o wn , t he In d ia n a n d t he Bl a c k in a l l o f u s i s pu t d o wn . T he s t ru ggl e o fth e mestiza i s a bo ve a l l a fe m in ist o n e . A s l o n g a s lo s hombres t h in k t he yha ve t o chingar mujeres30 a n d e a c h o t he r to be m e n , a s lo n g a s m e n a ret a u g h t t h a t t h e y a r e s u p e r i o r a n d t h e r e f o r e c u l t u r a l l y f a v o r e d o v e r lamujer,31 a s l o n g a s t o b e a vieja32 i s a t h in g o f d e r is io n , t he re c a n be n ore a l he a l in g o f o u r psyc he s. W e ' re ha l fwa y t he re we ha ve su c h l o ve o ft he Mo t he r, t he go o d m o t he r . T he f irs t s t e p i s t o u n l e a rn t he puta/virgen33 d i c h o t o m y a n d t o s e e Coatlapopeuh-Coatlicue in the Mother,Guadalupe.34T e n d e rn e ss, a s ign o f vu l n e ra bi l i t y, i s so fe a re d t h a t i t i s sho we re d o nw o m e n w i t h v e r b a l a b u s e a n d b l o w s . M e n , e v e n m o r e t h a n w o m e n , a r efe t t e re d t o ge n d e r ro l e s . W o m e n a t l e a st ha ve ha d t he gu t s t o bre a k o u to f bo n d a ge . On l y ga y m e n ha ve ha d t he c o u ra ge t o e xpo se t he m se l ve s t ot he wo m a n in s id e t he m a n d t o c ha l l e n ge t he c u rre n t m a sc u l in i t y. I ' vee n c o u n t e re d a fe w sc a t t e re d a n d iso l a t e d ge n t l e s t ra ight m e n , t he be gin n in gs o f a n e w bre e d , b u t t he y a re co n fu se d , a n d e n t a n g l e d wi t h sexistbe ha vio rs t ha t t he y ha ve n o t be e n a bl e t o e ra d ic a t e . W e n e e d a n e wm a s c u l i n i ty a n d t h e n e w m a n n e e d s a m o v e m e n t.

L u m p i n g t h e m a l e s w h o d e v i a t e f r o m t h e g e n e r a l n o r m w i t h m a n ,t he o ppre sso r , i s a gro ss in j u st ic e . Asombra pensar que nos hemosquedado en ese pozo oscuro donde el mundo encierra a las lesbianas.Asombra pensar que hemos, como jemenistas y lesbianas, cerradonuestros corazones a los hombres, a nuestros hermanos los jotos, de-sheredados y marginales como nosotros.35 Being the supreme crossers ofc u l t u re s, ho m o se xu a l s ha ve s t ro n g bo n d s wi t h t he q u e e r whi t e , Bl a c k,A s i a n, N a t i v e A m e r i c a n , L a t i n o , a n d w i t h t h e q u e e r i n I ta l y , A u s t ra l i a ,a n d t he rest o f t he pl a n e t . W e c o m e fro m a l l c o l o rs , a l l c la sse s, a l l r a c e s,a l l t im e pe r io d s. Ou r ro l e i s t o l in k pe o pl e wi t h e a c h o t he r t he Bl a c kswit h Je ws wi t h In d ia n s wi t h A s ia n s wi t h whi t e s wi t h e xt ra t e rre str i a l s .I t is t o t ra n sfe r id e a s a n d in fo rm a t i o n f ro m o n e c u l t u re to a n o t her .C o l o r e d h o m o s e x u a l s h a v e m o r e k n o w l e d g e o f o t h e r c u l t u r e s ; have

3(>chingar mujeres: fuck women.31Za mujer: th e woman.3\>ie/'a: o ld woman.33puta/virgen: whore/virgin.3iCoatlapopeuh-Coatlicue in the Mother, Guadalupe: a reference t o t h e dual iden

tity (Indian/pagan a nd Spanish/Christian) of t h e Virgin o f G u a d a l u p e . Anzaldua arguesthat "after the conquest, th e Spaniards a nd their Church . . . desexed G u a d a l u p e , takingCoatlalopeuh, th e serpent/sexuality, out of h e r" (Borderlands, Chapter 3) .

^Asombra pensar que nos hemos quedado, . . .: It 's astonishing to think that wehave stayed in that dark well where th e world locks up le s b i a n s . I t ' s astonishing to thinkthat as feminist le s b i a n s , w e have closed o u r hearts t o m e n , t o our g a y b rot h e rs , a sdisinherited a nd alienated a s w e a r e .

3 9 2 CREATED EQUAL

a l wa ys be e n a t t he fo refro n t (a l t ho u gh so m e t im e s i n t he c l o se t) o f a l ll ibe ra t io n s t ru ggl e s in t h is c o u n t ry; ha ve su ffe re d m o re in j u st ic e s a n dha ve su rv ive d t he m d e spi t e a l l o d d s. Chic a n o s n e e d t o a c kn o wl e d ge t hepo l i t ic a l a n d a r t i s t ic c o n t r ibu t io n s o f t he i r q u e e r . P e o pl e , l i s t e n t o wha ty o u r joteria36 i s sa yin g.T he m e st iz o a n d t he q u e e r e xis t a t t h is t im e a n d po in t o n t hee v o l u t i o n a r y c o n t i n u u m f o r a p u r p o s e . W e a r e a b l e n d i n g t h a t p r o v e st ha t a l l bl o o d i s in t r ic a t e l y wo ve n t o ge t he r , a n d t ha t we a re spa wn e d o u to f s im i l a r so u l s .

20

Somos un a g e n i e 3 7Ha y tantisimas jronterasque dividen a la gente,pew por cada fronteraexiste tambien un puente.^

G I N A V A L D E S 39Divided LoyaltiesM a n y w o m e n a n d m e n o f c o l o r d o n o t w a n t t o have a n y d e a l i n g swit h whi t e pe o pl e . I t t a ke s t o o m u c h t im e a n d e n e rgy t o e xpl a in t o t hed o wn wa rd l y m o bi l e , whi t e m id d l e - c l a ss wo m e n t ha t i t ' s o ka y fo r u s t ow a n t to o w n " p o s s e ss i o n s ," n e ve r h a v i n g h a d a n y n i c e f u r n i t u r e o n o u rd i r t f l o o rs o r " l u xu r ie s" l ike wa shin g m a c hin e s. Ma n y fe e l t ha t whi t e ssho u l d he l p t he i r o wn pe o pl e r id t he m se l ve s of r a c e h a t r e d a n d f e a rf i rs t . I , fo r o n e , c ho o se t o u se so m e o f m y e n e rgy t o se rve a s m e d ia t o r . It h in k w e ne e d to a l l o w w h i t es t o b e o u r a l l i e s . T h r o u g h o u r l i t e r a t u r e ,a r t , corridos,40 a n d fo l kta l e s we m u st sha re o u r h is t o ry wi t h t he m sowhe n t he y se t u p c o m m it t e e s t o he l p Big Mo u n t a in Na va j o s 41 o r t h eC h i c a n o f a r m w o r k e r s o r los Nicaraguenses42 t h e y w o n ' t t u r n p e o p l ea wa y be c a u se o f t he i r r a c i a l fe a rs a n d ign o ra n c e s. T he y wi l l c o m e t o se et ha t t he y a re n o t he l pin g u s bu t fo l l o win g o u r l e a d .

In d iv id u a l l y, bu t a l so a s a r a c i a l e n t i t y, we n e e d t o vo ic e o u r n e e d s.W e n e e d to sa y t o wh i t e so c ie t y: we n e e d yo u t o a c c e pt t he fa c t t ha tChic a n o s a re d i f fe re n t , t o a c kn o wl e d ge yo u r re j e c t io n a n d n e ga t io n o fus. W e n e e d y o u t o o w n t h e fa c t t h a t y o u l o o k e d u p o n u s a s le ss t h a n

36/oten'a; gayness.3''Somas una gente: We a re on e p e op le .3%Hay tantisimas jronteras . , .: There a re s o many borders / dividing people / b u t

through each border there / passes a b r i d g e .38Richard Wilhelm, The I Ching or Book of Changes, t r a n s . Cary F. Baynes (Pr i n c e

ton, NJ: Princeton University Press, 1950), 98. [Author's not e]40corridos- ballads o r narrative folk songs of Me x i c o.41Btg Mountain Navajoes: Big Mountain is an area i n N e w Mexico at the center o f a

Navaho a nd Hopi dispute over land rights a nd treaty c o n d i t i o n s .4Hos Nicaraguenses: T h e N i c a r a g u a n s .

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1h u m a n , t h a t y o u st o l e o u r l a n d s , o u r p e r s o n h o o d , o u r s e lf -r es p ec t. W en e e d y o u t o m a k e p u b l i c r e s ti t u t i o n : t o s a y t h a t , t o c o m p e n s a t e fo r y o u ro w n s e n s e o f d ef e c ti v e n e s s , y o u s t r i v e fo r p o w e r o v e r u s , y o u e r a s e o u rh i s t o r y a n d o u r e x p e r i e n c e b e c a u s e i t m a k e s y o u f e e l g u i l t y y o u ' dr a t h e r f o r g e t y o u r b r u t i s h a c t s . T o s a y y o u ' v e s p l i t y o u r s e lf f ro m m i n o r i t y g r o u p s , t h a t y o u d i s o w n u s , t h a t y o u r d u a l c o n s c i o u s n e s s s p l i ts o ffp a r t s o f yourself, t r a n s f e r r i n g t h e " n e g a t i v e " p a r t s o n t o u s . ( W h e r e t h e r ei s p e r s e c u t i o n o f m i n o r i t i e s , t h e r e i s s h a d o w p r o j e c t i o n . W h e r e t h e r e i sv i o l e n c e a n d w a r , t h e r e i s r e p r e s s i o n o f s h a d o w . ) T o sa y t h a t y o u a r ea f r a i d o f u s , th a t to p u t d i s t a n c e b e t w e e n u s , y o u w e a r t h e m a s k o fc o n t e m p t . A d m i t t h a t M e x i c o i s y o u r d o u b l e , t h a t sh e e x is ts i n t h es h a d o w o f th i s c o u n t r y , t h a t w e a r e i r re v o c a b l y ti e d to h er . G r i n g o ,a c c e p t t h e d o p p e l g a n g e r 4 3 i n y o u r p s y c h e . B y t a k i n g b a c k y o u r c o l l e c t i v e s h a d o w t h e i n t r a c u l t u r a l s p l i t w i l l h e a l . A n d f i na l l y, t e ll u s w h a ty o u n e e d f ro m u s .B y Y o u r T r u e F a c es W e W i l l K n o w Y o u

I a m v i s i b l e s e e t h i s I n d i a n f a c e y e t I a m i n v i s i b l e . I b o t hb l i n d t h e m w i t h m y b e a k n o s e a n d a m t h e i r b l i n d s p o t . B u t I e x i s t, w ee x i s t . T h e y ' d l i k e t o t h i n k I h a v e m e l t e d i n t h e p o t . B u t I h a v e n ' t , w eh a v e n ' t .

T h e d o m i n a n t w h i t e c u l t u r e is k i l l i n g u s s l o w l y w i t h i t s i g n o r a n c e .B y t a k i n g a w a y o u r s e lf - d e t e rm i n a t i o n , i t h a s m a d e u s w e a k a n d e m p ty .A s a p e o p l e w e h a v e r es i s t e d a n d w e h a v e t a k e n e x p e d i e n t p o s i t i o n s , b u tw e h a v e n e v e r b e e n a l l o w e d t o d e v e lo p u n e n c u m b e r e d w e h a v e n e ve rb e e n a l l o w e d t o b e fu l l y o u r s e l v e s . T h e w h i t e s i n p o w e r w a n t u s p e o p l eo f c o l o r t o b a r r i c a d e ourselves b e h i n d o u r s e p a r a t e t r i b a l w a l l s s o t h e yc a n p i c k u s o ff o n e a t a t i m e w i t h t h e i r h i d d e n w e a p o n s ; s o th e y c a nw h i t e w a s h a n d d i s t o r t h i s t o r y . I g n o r a n c e sp l i ts p e o p l e , c r e a t e s p re j u d i c e s . A m i s i n f o r m e d p e o p l e i s a s u b j u g a t e d p e o p l e .

B e fo r e t h e C h i c a n o a n d t h e u n d o c u m e n t e d w o r k e r a n d t h e M e xi c a nf r o m t h e o t h e r s i d e c a n c o m e t o g e t h e r , b e f o r e th e C h i c a n o c a n h a v eu n i t y w i t h N a t i v e A m e r i c a n s a n d o t h e r g r o u p s , w e n e e d t o k n o w t h eh i s t o r y o f t h e i r s t r u g g l e a n d t h e y n e e d t o k n o w o u r s . O u r m o t h e r s , o u rs i s t e r s a n d b r o t h e r s , t h e g u y s w h o h a n g o u t o n s t r e e t c o r n e r s , t h ec h i l d r e n i n t h e p l a y g r o u n d s , e a c h o f u s m u s t k n o w o u r I n d i a n l i n e a g e ,o u r airo-mestisaje,44 o u r h i s t o r y o f r e s i s t a n c e .

T o t h e i m m i g r a n t mexicano a n d t h e r e c e n t a r ri v a l s w e m u s t t e a c ho u r h i s to r y . T h e 8 0 m i l l i o n mexicanos a n d t h e L a t i n o s f ro m C e n t r a l a n dS o u t h A m e r i c a m u s t k n o w o f o u r s tr u g g l e s. E a c h o n e o f u s m u s t know

^doppelganger: a double .44afro-mestisaje: mixed-blood Latino people of African descent.

I

b a s i c f a c ts a b o u t N i c a r a g u a , C h i l e , a n d t h e re s t o f L a t i n A m e r i c a . T h eL a t i n o i s t m o v e m e n t ( C h i c a n o s , P u e r t o R i c a n s , C u b a n s , a n d o t h e rS p a n i s h - s p e a k i n g p e o p l e w o r k i n g t o g e t h e r t o c o m b a t r a c i a l d i s c r i m i n a t i o n in t h e m a r k e t p l a c e ) i s g o o d b u t i t i s n o t e n o u g h . O t h e r t h a n ac o m m o n c u l t u r e w e w i l l h a v e n o t h i n g t o h o l d u s t o g e t h e r . W e n e e d t om e et o n a b r o a d e r c o m m u n a l g r o u n d .

T h e s t r u g g l e is i n n e r : C h i c a n o , indio,45 A m e r i c a n In d i a n , mo -jado,46 mexicano, i m m i g r a n t L a t i n o , A n g l o i n p o w e r , w o r k i n g c la s sA n g l o , B l a c k , A s i a n o u r p s y ch e s r e s e m b l e t h e b o r d e r t o w n s a n d a r ep o p u l a t e d b y t h e s a m e p e o p l e . T h e s t r u g g l e ha s a l w a y s b e e n i n n e r , a n dis p l a y e d o u t i n t h e o u t e r te r r a i n s . A w a r e n e s s o f o u r s i t u a t i o n m u s t c o m eb e fo r e i n n e r c h a n g e s , w h i c h i n t u r n c o m e b e f o r e c h a n g e s i n s o c i et y .N o t h i n g h a p p e n s i n t h e " r e a l " w o r l d u n l e s s i t f i r s t h a p p e n s i n t h e i m a g e si n o u r h e a d s .

4^indio: Indian (of Mexico/Central Am erica).4mojado: w e t b a c k .

Engaging t he Text1. W h a t d o e s A n z a l d u a m e a n b y "mestizo c o n s c i o u s n e s s " ? W h y d o e s s h e t h i n ksuch a new conscio usness is necessary? W ha t r isks and rew ard s does she associate with a mestizo c o n s c i o u s n e s s ?2. T h e c o n c e p t o f t h e mestizo, l ike the myth o f the melt ing p ot , invo lves thec o m i n g t o g e t h e r o f t w o o r m o r e c u l t u r e s . H o w d o e s t h e i d e a o f mestizo c o n sciousness dif fer f rom the melt ing pot metaphor?3. H o w d o e s A n z a l d u a d e f i n e t h e co n c e p t o f machismo i n t h i s e s sa y ? H o w d o e sit connect to the idea of mestiza c o n s c io u s n e s s ? W h y , a c c o r d i n g t o A n z a l d u a ,a r e h o m o s e x u a l s i m p o r t a n t t o th i s n ew w a y o f t h i n k i n g ?4. I n p a r a g r a p h 7 , A n z a l d u a d i s t i n gu i s h e s b e t w e e n a w e s t e r n m o d e o f t h i n k i n g, w h i c h s he co n s i d e r s n a r r o w a n d i n a d e q u a t e , a n d a m o r e c o m p r e h e n s i v e" d i v e rg e n t" m o d e o f t h o u g h t . D o yo u t h i n k a p e r s o n t r a i n e d i n t r a d i t i o n a lw e st er n th o u g h t c a n o r s h o u l d l e a r n t o t h i n k d i f f e re n t ly ?5. Discuss the effects of A nzaldu a 's f requent use of Spani sh, her mix of pro sea n d p o e t r y , h e r r e f e re n c e s t o M e x i c a n / I n d i a n d e i t i e s a n d f o l k t a l e s, h e r m o v e m e nt b e t w e e n vi v i d i m a g e a n d b r o a d g e n e r a l i z a t i o n , a n d o t h e r d i s t i n c ti v eelements of her essay.

Explor ing Connect ions6 . W r i t e a d i a l o g u e b e t w e e n A n z a l d u a a n d V i r g i n i a R. H a r r i s a n d T r i n i t y A .Ordof ia (p. 359) on cross-rac ial host i l i ty. Does mestiza consciousness offer analternat ive to such host i l i t ies?

3 9 4 C R E A T E D EQUAL A N Z A L D U A LA CONCIENCIADE L A M E S T IZ A 3 9 5

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