Building a Childs Self-Concept

Tony Chestnut (Song #2)Tony chestnut knows I Love You!(toe knee) (chest head) (nose) (eye) (cross arms) (point)Tony KnowsTony KnowsTony Chestnut knows I Love You!Thats what Tony knows

Building a Childs Self-ConceptBuilding yours, too.

Write your name on the blank side of the index card, NOT THE LINED SIDE

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Resiliency = the capacity to bounce back after disappointment or tragedy.Self-Concept = The total picture of who we are.Our looks and traits, how we feel, what we think, who we see when we look in the mirrorA childs self-concept is in place by age 5.

STAND UP FROM THE INSIDE!4

This important for them to have!

Do you still have the 100% you were born with?Imagine what you could do if you did!Children are born with 100% Self-Concept*Blow up a balloon and tie it off to represent this. When they fall down they get back up and dont give up. When asked who is the best at an activity they all say I am even if they dont know what it is. When told they look pretty or did well they say I know. They dont compare diapers or clothes or strollers with other babies. Blow up a balloon to represent their SC, but dont tie it their SC tie has come undone and watch what happens when something happens to you (let go and watch it fly). The balloon lays there until it gets picked up and brushed off again by you or someone else. You could do so much more!5

High and Low self-concept (SG #2)

High: smiles, looks you in the eye, walks with head up, laughs, has lots of friends, positive attitude, not afraid to try new thingsLow: ???

Child Self-Concept vs. Your Self-ConceptWHAT INFLUENCES THIS?Discuss high and low appearances of SC.

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1. SELF - PERCEPTIONCelebrate yourself.8Do You Celebrate Yourself like Jessica does?

Abbys nephew or the other clip92. Verbal and Non-verbal Communication Communication We hear, say, or See.We believe it and may even become it.4 positive words for every negative word or action can alter the affects of the negative.

whiteSay white 4x- getting louder each time. Quickly ask what cows drink? NOT MILK. You just programmed your brain to believe what you said.10

3. Positive and Negative InteractionsWhy do we continue to hang around with or do that which brings us or others down?

11Self Concept CircleThe person I think I am.The person others think I am.The person others think I think I am.

My ActionsOthers Reactions To MeAs Others See (think about) MeAs I See (think about) Myself12Self-Fulfilling ProphecyA Child Becomes what the Person sees or thinks the child is!Children remember 3% of what we say to them and 97% of what we do with them.Our Perception becomes our realityI wont see it until I believe it.

Mrs. SmithParent says brat child becomes a brat (the best brat the parent ever saw). Parent says amazing child becomes that. Even if parent doesnt quite see it, if they say it then the child will believe it.Brecon was in 2nd grade with Mrs. Smith. Up until this point all we had heard from other teachers was that Brecon is awesome, happy, friendly, entertaining, kindbut talks a lot, plays around, inattentive, touches stuff, moves around in seat Mrs. Smith said all of this, but had an idea. When saw brecon doing these actions, she quietly gave him a bean instead of drawing attention to it out loud. When she noticed brecon doing what he was asked, she said something out loud, gave him sticky notes, patted his back Even if Brecon only did the action for 1 sec or minute a very short time, she acknowledged it. She believed what he really could be, saw it, and he became it! No more phone calls, notes, missing out on stickers13

Keys to Developing a Childs Self-Concept

Snake/Search around the roomWHAT WERE KEYS THAT YOU WROTE DOWN?What does it mean to you / to a kid? 14I got two As, the small boy said, his voice was filled with glee.His father bluntly asked, Why didnt you get three?Mom, Ive got the dishes done, the girl called from the door.Her mother very calmly said, Did you sweep the floor?I mowed the grass, the tall boy said, and put the mower away.His father asked him with a shrug, "Did you clean off the clay?The children in the house next door seemed happy and content.The same things happened over there, but this is how it went.15Ive got two As, the small boy said. His voice was filled with glee.His father proudly said, "That's great, Im glad that you belong to me.Mom, Ive got the dishes done, the girl called from the door.Her mother smiled and softly said, Each day I love you more.Ive mowed the grass, the tall boy said, and put the mower away.His father answered with much joy, Youve made my happy day.Children deserve a little praise for tasks theyre asked to do. If theyre to lead a happy life, so much depends on you.Study guide scenarios16

Keys to Developing a Childs Self-Concept17Provide more successes than failures for the child.Give the freedom to fail with acceptance.Plan successesPoint out successesHelp the child perceive him/herself as successfulProvide practice to improve skillsIf they have more failures than successes, back up to where success is achieved, and then move ahead gradually

As long as there are more successes than failures, children learn to not let a few failures get them down.A child who is over-protected and not allowed to fail will learn to try only if success is guaranteed.

18Give lots of encouragement.Give unconditional love.Recognize the effort and improvement, not just the final accomplishment.Support as they do new things.I know you can do itYou handled that really wellYou will make it next timeShow appreciation. Thanks, you were a big help

Let child know that even if you do not approve of their behavior, you still love them.Accept children as they are, not as they could be.Respect your child.Show them how much you care about them.

19Allow independence.Eliminate the negative.Let them do things for themselves.Let them work through a problem.Give them choices as early as possible.

Tell children what they can do, not what they cannot do.Catch them doing something good more often than what they are doing wrong.

20Do not set standards unreasonably high.Avoid ridicule.They dont have to be 100% all the time.Know their abilities and work within those abilities.Children are not miniature adults.Do not over-estimate their maturity.Development if child

Be careful of nicknames.Do not make fun of them, especially in front of others.

21Allow exploration and encourage questions.Set limits.Let them explore their environment.Give them a chance to see cause and effect, such as what happens when a rock is dropped in water. . .Play, get messy, touch

Set limits (boundaries and rules)It helps them to feel security, protected, valued, and loved.

22Help your child develop their talents.Take their ideas, emotions and feelings seriously.Every child needs to feel that they are good at something. Give them encouragement and opportunities to try new things.Encourage their talents, not the ones you wish they had.

Do not belittle themThat is nothing to cry over, or Youll get over it.Ask them for their advice and opinions.Listen to them and act on their thoughts.

23Be a good role model.Give your children responsibility.Improve your own self-image. Let your children see that you value yourself.Let your children see you make mistakes, learn from them, and try again.

Give them chores that are appropriate for their age.Give them family jobs so that they feel valued and important to the family.

24Be available.Let children know when their behavior is appropriateGive them support when they need it.Spend time together. Work, talk, and share activities together.

Point out when they are meeting your expectations and requests.25

Celebrate the AWESOME name on that 3x5 cardDecorate the Name Child ActivityThings to work on:

Haiku Poem on back of your name card

Assignment # 5 (page 7) Study guide scenarios Do Reflection #5 What ice cream flavor describes your self-concept explain? __________________________________________Your Name___________________________________________2 adjectives describing you__________________________________________3 Verbs that relate to you___________________________________________A 4 word phrase about you___________________________________________1 word that explains who you are.26