Thriving As a 'Working Mom': The ChildcareChallenge� |� Stephanie Hsu

A large part of my identity involves being a mother. That may sound obvious and a bit corny, but Iwasn't always sure that I wanted to have kids. My parents had a contentious divorce complete withbig lawyers' bills and arguments over money and child visitation. Having a child was the furthestthing from my mind for several years.

So here I am now, 20 years later, with a husband whom I met in business school and a preschoolerwho brings immense joy -- and occasional chaos -- into my life. I now have doctor and dentist visits toschedule and attend for my daughter, expectations for regular volunteering at her preschool andchildcare coordination, which seems never-ending.

To complicate matters, I am a business professional who works in the health care industry. This caninvolve some long hours when a client project is due, early conference calls when I have an eastcoast-based client and travel for important meetings. I enjoy the work; it keeps my brain sharp,utilizes the expertise I have built up over the past couple decades and pays preschool bills. And itmakes me appreciate the time I spend with my daughter all the more.

Yes, I am a "working mom." This morning, I dropped my daughter off at summer camp, and then Iwent to work at my office desk. I participated in client conference calls, worked on PowerPointslides, conducted research, sent out emails and began preparing a script for a client presentationlater this week. In between that, I coordinated a play date with a friend's mom, coordinated summercamp schedules with another mom, made dinner reservations for a date night with my husband nextweekend and researched Red Cross courses to refresh our CPR/First Aid skills. Every day isdifferent, mostly variations on the same theme.

If I had to pick the most important aspect of being able to be a "working mom," it is havingdependable childcare. If there are no other responsible, qualified adults who are available to takecare of my daughter, I am the default. If my daughter is sick and she cannot go to preschool, I amthe default. f her preschool has a vacation or teacher work day, I am the default. Work comes to agrinding halt. My clients and projects have to wait until there is a childcare resolution.

My husband helps when he can and does some morning drop-offs, but when he has to travel for workor prepare for a senior management presentation or attend an early morning meeting, I can't counton him. There are no family members who can cover for us. My parents, in-laws, and sister liveabout a six hour drive away from where I live in Los Angeles, not close enough to babysit in a pinchor come over and cook dinner. The good news is that it is still reachable with a short flight -- withsome planning, of course.

Many of my friends and peers are part of families where both parents have a corporate or office job,and they face similar challenges. They live more than a quick car ride away from their parents andrelatives. Others have family members that are far enough away that a flight is needed for a visit.This involves more planning and cost. Still others have one or both parents who have health issuesor have passed away, leaving the parents to find stand-ins for grandma and grandpa.

Because of my husband's and my long work days and travel schedules and the absence of local

family support, daycare is not a viable childcare option for us. Neither my husband nor I areconsistently done with our workday in time for a 5 or 6 p.m. daycare pickup. Daycare seems to beorganized assuming that one parent has a lot of flexibility, and that just doesn't seem realistic thesedays. So we have had to rely on nannies.

During the times when we were searching for a new childcare provider, I had to de-prioritize someof my work to make time for nanny interviews and trial periods. Since I am an independentconsultant, I lost wages since I couldn't bill the hours I was dedicating to the nanny search. Someparents working more traditional office jobs face different challenges with not having enoughflexibility for a thorough childcare giver search depending on their boss or company culture.

So why is it so frustrating for us and many other Americans to find high quality and affordable childcare? The U.S. infrastructure for childcare seems to be a few decades behind the times. It assumesthere are two parents, one of whom can devote their life to child-related activities. It assumes manyjobs end at 5 p.m.. And it assumes that parents can rely on extended family members to fill in thegap. These assumptions are outdated and just wrong for many families --including mine.

A month ago, a White House Summit on Working Families took place where panels discussed carechallenges and what companies can do to support their employees who are working parents. It'sabout time that all businesses, not just the occasional Fortune 500 company, find ways to supportemployees who rely on childcare. This support can come in many forms that could include:

- Consistent paid maternity leave

- Longer maternity leave

- Onsite daycare/preschool at your employer

- Subsidies for daycare/preschool

- Flexibility around working from infant care home/remotely

- Childcare service that comes to your home when your child is sick

There are many reasons a parent says no to a job offer, goes part-time or drops out of the workforcealtogether, and childcare challenges are probably near the top of the list. Let's start thinking morecreatively about how to fix this problem and build stronger families and communities in the process.