thread magazine issue #6

thread magazine | summer 2012 | threadvt.com

summer | 2012issue #6

pizzeria veritafinders keeperstj donovan

creemees btvhey. sweet bike

the spot10% of proceeds from this issue go to the intervale center

During the colonial era, hard cider was the most popular alcoholic beverage in america.

The average family in the late 1700’s had seven children.

Coincidence?



Coincidence?


96 Church St Burl ington VT 05401phone 802 864 2800 fax 802 864 3602Stella-Mae.com /StellaMaeVT @StellaMaeVT



Coincidence?



Coincidence?


Digger’s Mirth, Burlington

Photo by J.Silverman

City Market is dedicated to strengthening the local food system. We’re grateful for our local farmers who provide our Co-op’s members and

customers with nourishing food all year long!

82 S. Winooski Ave. Burlington, VT 05401Open 7 days a week, 7 a.m. - 11 p.m. (802) 861-9700 www.citymarket.coop

Together, Better Choices…like partnerships with local farmers.

“ Untitled.” by Nissa Kauppilanissakauppila.com

10. the scale of summerpatrick law

12. finders keepersjohn flanagan

18. the spotlettie stratton

22. hey. sweet bike.raychel severance

34. pizzeria veritaj.d. landry

38. tj donovanzach despart

42. dairy diaryjohn flanagan

thread magazine | summer 2012 | issue #6contents


publisher / editorben sarle

[email protected]

copy editorsdavid scherr

lorenne gavish

contributing writersjohn flanaganzach despart

j.d. landrypatrick law

lettie strattonmadeleine liebman

contributing artists / photographersraychel severance

hailey schofieldfrances cannon

nissa kaupilazelde grimm

design contributorsraychel severance

masthead

pen & ink illustration by Hailey Schofieldhaileyschofield.wordpress.com

on the cover:raychel severance

p. ben sarle

This is Thread Magazine issue #6. Read it outside.

Summer in Burlington.

Enjoy.

Ben Sarle, Editor & Publisher and

The Thread Magazine Syndicate

look: threadvt.com

like: facebook.com/threadvt

follow: @threadvt


“Puppet” Silkscreen PrintFrances C

annon | honeyhogart.posterous.com

of summerthe scale

gouache & silkscreen print by Hailey Schofield | haileyschofield.wordpress.com

by patrick law

10


In mid-June, the young saplings stand about two feet high. Stick your head be-tween their small, sturdy stems and no-tice the scale of the world you’ve just en-tered. Watch the insects scatter as you pull another weed from the chalky soil. Look at how the pencil-thin limbs reach for the sun and how the dirt cakes when your sweat drips like a leaky faucet.

If you look up, you may notice the wall of tall trees that stand sentry over the young saplings. The wind forces them to wave and bow like Broadway showmen. Each individual leaf is lost in the sway, just as the song of each individual bird is lost in the symphony of late afternoon sound. As the light changes, it causes colors to bleed. It’s the same soft summer light that captured the imagination of impres-

sionists like Manet, who said, “there are no lines in nature, only areas of color, one against each other.”

All of which is to say, if you want to expri-ence summer in Burlington, the Intervale is a pretty good place to begin. But while it’s easy to get lost in reverie, summer is more than green landscapes and natural communities, though an understanding of ecology is useful when observing the dif-ferent species that populate our city. Ecol-ogy is all about relationships; how organ-isms relate to each other and to the place in which they reside. Each time I ride my bike home from the Intervale in the sum-mer, I have the opportunity to witness the swirling dance of people and place. It begins in the next field over, where a West African woman is tilling the soil with hand tools. Two men chat near the edge of the field and one of them waves as I steer my bike into an empty lot. Still trac-tors slumber like lazy cows in the sun. As I roll past the gate, I think back to last year when this road was another braid of the Winooski River. But now the farmers are back, Irene be damned. When I reach the hardtop I can feel the sun bounce of the asphalt like heat from a cast iron pan. The traffic is thick, but it thins af-ter the intersection of North Winooski and Riverside Drive. At a little league game in Roosevelt Park, the kids play while their parent peck at smartphones, looking up long enough to see each pitch. The smell of charcoal hangs in the air, its origin inde-terminable. In backyards and down drive-ways people lounge with a beer in their hand, perhaps a horseshoe in the other. Porches become second living rooms and it’s easy to get pulled into a casual meal or an impromptu party that continues long after the last kabob. My bike weaves and wanders through the Old North End, past Rose Street and the Shopping Bag, where people live publicly, everything on display. At North Winooski, I take a right and then ride up through the College Ghetto. Pizza boxes and empty beer cans roll down the street like tumble-weeds. In June, when the students shuck their belongings, the sidewalk is scattered

with cheap plastic and faux wood. But it doesn’t take long before people swoop in to process the carrion of this overcon-sumption. Just as the student body dissipates, the tourists arrive. They amble down Church Street in white sneakers and khaki shorts, looking for ways to spend money. The Quebecois, in their designer jeans and sci-fi sneakers, bring a euro vibe that adds a cosmopolitan hue to our provincial out-post. When the sun begins to set, the tables on Church Street act like flowers, a source of nectar for those hoping to spread their pollen. Beers and cocktails condensate, while the possibility of sex lingers in the air. It billows like a loose skirt through bars and restaurants, and stops on the street corner where a couple deliberates, as if the night could lead anywhere but the one place they both want to go. In the win-ter, you find a partner and have practical sex to brace against the cold. But in the summer, sex is a way of celebrating the elements. You have it in the heat, with soil between your toes and sweaty skin that peels apart like wet leaves. Momentum carries me down Main Street and towards the setting sun. I needle my way onto the bike path, past pedestrians and cyclists. Fresh patches of black as-phalt cover the scars of last year’s floods. Through the chainlink fence that hedg-es the narrow path, I catch a glimpse of someone walking the train tracks, per-haps a transient hoping to enter the city unseen. Picking up speed, I wheel past couples capturing memories and loners pondering their loneliness. Passing the park in Lakeside, there are kids playing on the corner playground. I take a right onto Central Avenue, then a quick left down my driveway. With my bike in the garage, I settle onto the back stoop and feel a cool breeze coming from the West. A streak of late day sun reflects off the water as if someone took a dandelion and smeared it across the skin of Lake Champlain. The day is over, but there are more to come.

12

FINDERS KEEPERS:TAKING WAKING WINDOWS II


WORDS // JOHN FLANAGANPHOTOS // BEN SARLE

Last year, Angioplasty Media’s Waking Win-dows festival hung its hat at the Monkey House in Winooski for a marathon eleven days, from June 2nd-12th. Nick Mavodones and Paddy Reagan, the taste-making minds behind Angio, picked up the idea after Peter Negroponte’s Other Music Festival, an alternative to the Bur-lington Discover Jazz Fest.

“It was sort of a protest,” Reagan said of the OMF. “After one year I think Pete just wanted to move on.”

Reagan and Mavodones redubbed the OMF as Waking Windows when they adopted the festi-val. The name is based loosely off of a lyric in an In Tall Buildings song.

At WWI, Future Islands played to a bursting, sweat soaked room, Kath Bloom recovered expertly from an awkward moment where a musician she’d invited on stage yelled at Bill Mullins for walking in the door with a guitar, and amongst a titanic list of other incredible shows, Jason Cooley played a DJ Schoolbus set, Ryan Power warped minds, and modest guitar genie Glenn Jones summoned myriad spirits. Last year’s festival focused on giving different musicians specific nights to curate. NNA Tapes, Greg Davis, and DJ Disco Phantom were among some of the contributors.

“It kind of worked out,” says Reagan, “but it was exhausting as hell.” This year, the ado was expanded to new locales and corralled into three evenings and one day, May 10th-12th. Angio booked the entire event, though Matt Rogers of MSR Presents slotted the Blow and Mitten to finish off the festival on Sat-urday Night. An artist market and comedy show joined the previously all-musical line-up as well.

Venues for WWII included completely unheard of spaces, such as the Winooski Welcome Cen-ter and the StopLight Gallery, as well as local haunts not used to having High Life-buzzed hipsters crowding through their doors, such as the Block Gallery and the Methodist Epis-copal Church, on East and West Allen Streets respectively. The fourth floor of the Winooski parking garage was to host a Saturday daytime rock show, but due to scheduling conflicts and time restrictions, bands were moved indoors.

DAY ONE

Festivities began on Thursday in a rain-threat-ening twilight. Reagan and Lendway guitar-ist/Metal Monday promoter Matt Hagen were setting up the Welcome Center, while Way-lon Speed loaded into the Monkey across the street. A representative from Long Trail, a sponsor of the event, chatted up the Monkey bartender who was drinking Red Bulls in an-ticipation of a long night ahead. Despite the absence of a crowd, Reagan and Hagen, joined by Henry Webb, played a slow and improvised soundscape guitar set under the name Sir Round Sound. The trio drifted

into dark recesses that culminated with Ha-gen’s signature use of an amplified electric drill. Eight framed photographs hung behind them, illuminated by bright washes of blue lights, and a few scattered strands of hang-ing bulbs punctuated the mood. Jason “Liggy” Liggett, also a sponsor, designed and provided the lighting. As Sir Round Sound’s gentle noise gasped slowly into silence, the musicians sat contemplatively for a moment.

“That was a really good thing for me to do first thing,” Reagan said. Hagen elaborated: “Yeah, it got light, it got dark…”

“And I think I bit my lip,” Reagan finished. Reagan then switched modes to become soundman for Missy Bly, who kicked off her set with her wonderfully breathy “Songbird Road.”

Meanwhile, Brett Hughes began his set to a half-packed Monkey.

“Lowell, you want to come up?” he asked of the impressively mustachioed Lowell Thompson, about to enjoy his dinner. “I know you got your pizza n’ all.” Kelly Ravin, of Waylon Speed, mo-seyed up instead, joining Hughes for “Maybe I Will,” a staple at Hughes’ Honky Tonk Tuesdays at the Radio Bean in Burlington. Thompson came up next. As the flannel crowd ushered closer to the stage, it became clear that WWII was already prompting an unintentional cate-gorization of Burlington’s diverse scene. Those drawn more to the subtleties of tradition stood in reverence of the Telecaster barks and wails at the Monkey, while at the Welcome Center, those attracted to the think-piece noise of elec-tronic deconstruction stood still and watched SnakeFoot and Principal Dean wage a techy assault. Of course, there were plenty drawn to-wards both sides of the street; $25 earned this type the all-access chance to dawn a WWII pin

Below: Parmaga performing at the Winooski Welcome Center.Right: The Blow at the Monkey House. // Ben Sarle

“I think this is the longest I’ve ever been in Winooski.” Linc Holloran / Hello Shark


and dodge Winooski traffic in a venue-hopping, schizophrenic blur. After missing the Smittens accidentally, it was a pleasure to watch SnakeFoot (Ross Travis) and Principal Dean (Miles Dean Ewell) team up for a mostly slow, dreamy synth set that took ad-vantage of the spaces between their sound as much as it carved out somehow melodic, post-catchy riffs. It could have been rapped over, but it’s best it was not. The duo’s sound that night landed someplace between Hello Nasty and what the Well-Tempered Clavier might have sounded like had Bach smoked DMT. After a set of smoky harmonies from the very catchy, and very good, Shelly Shredder, Way-lon Speed closed out the evening over at the Monkey. The band was fresh from the road and from recording their latest disc of alt-country/metal tunes, Valance. Well past midnight, the Speed crew let loose in an atmosphere more congenial to their sound than the spartan blackness of the Higher Ground’s Showcase Lounge, where their sold-out CD release party was held a week earlier. One particular audi-ence member in a green hat screamed along to every word of their hit, “I Heard the Shot.” The night ran smoothly, though a resident liv-ing above the Welcome Center did ask Reagan to turn the music down before any of it started.

DAY TWO

“Friday was just awesome in general,” Reagan said in an interview after the festival was over. The evening did in fact offer some of the most revered names in town alongside unheard of talent from afar. The most impressive out-of-towner, perhaps, was North America. The duo was supposed to play last year, but broke down in White Hall and couldn’t make it. North America’s set at the StopLight began to a near-ly empty room, though a sizable crowd gath-ered as tweets and texts championed their not-to-miss, mad scientist instrumentals. Their simple guitar/drum instrumentation revealed complex extremes and spot-on orchestration.

“Yeah they reached out to me for a chance to play again,” Reagan said at the show. “I was like, ‘Hell yeah, mofos.’” Before North America played another notable band of outsiders, Jaw Gems. And though the StopLight certainly earned the “worst smelling room of the evening” award, it also offered the

most worthy alternatives to bands that play in town frequently. Jaw Gems, featuring mem-bers of Portland, Maine-based Brenda, punned on their city of origin by playing a spot-on cover of Washed Out’s “Feel It All Around,” better known as the theme song to IFC’s Portlandia. Locals in the StopLight that night included Spacemen Saturday Night, who fostered a somewhat awkward vibe, though the malad-justed mood was not altogether unwelcome – and perhaps even sought out. The band earned paltry snickers for off-target jokes about sell-ing out to Johnson & Johnson, a quip somehow tied to Time magazine’s then-popular breast-feeding fandango. The scattered, younger crowd – more of a gang, really – then head banged along to Gloaming, also from Burlington. Despite the band’s “I don’t give a fuck that my amp isn’t any bigger than a laser printer” approach, their sound was full, thoughtful, and very, very driving. They packed in tremolo picking, thick bass chugs, and a mid-set primal scream from their drum-mer, whose bass drum kept trying to escape her. All in all, it was good music to bury a body to. Flashing behind the band was a potpourri of video clips mashed together by the multi-talented Rebecca Kopyinski, AKA Nuda Veritas, who performed immediately after Gloaming. Next door, the picture frames were noticeably more crooked than they were the night before. On stage, Lendway was reminding the crowd

how good they are. Their set expanded upon Mike Clifford and Matt Hagen’s intricate gui-tar riffing found on their latest release, Giant Places.

“Anyone know a joke?” Clifford asked at one point as he tuned. One audience member missed the implied rhetorical delivery and told some long-winded groaner about a bear doing drugs at a bar, or something. The band pretended to kick him out and then teased Led Zeppelin’s “No Quarter.” Despite more unfamiliar bands elsewhere, I couldn’t justify missing Swale. Their cover of Guided By Voices’ “Smothered in Hugs” vin-dicated my decision. Singer and guitarist Eric Ford withdrew expertly extracted feedback to pile upon the bands dissonant drone. Crouched inches from his amplifier, he played berserk riffs reminiscent of Lennon’s work on “The End,” or Jeff Tweedy’s SG tempests on Kicking Television. I was so mesmerized that I showed up too late to see any of the comedians per-forming at the Block Gallery, and had to help rearrange furniture instead. The Monkey’s bands for the evening were equally outstanding. I’m sorry to have missed Teleport, but Vedora, a trio from Burlington clad in all-white garb, dished out the pure heavy. Surely their upcoming debut album, funded by their Kickstarter campaign, will find a welcoming crowd.

While PooLoop razzled and dazzled with their Keytar prowess, Monkey soundman Ben Mayock downed a 5-hour Energy drink.

“I think I’m going to need someone to drive me home tonight,” he said. Then he clapped his hands together and shook his head. Dino Bravo followed PooLoop with a heavy set of tunes that sported enough muscle and showmanship to vindicate the band’s WWF namesake. Following their set, hoards ambled over to catch Hello Shark at the Welcome Cen-ter.

“I think this is the longest I’ve ever been in Win-ooski,” said HS front man Linc Holloran to a mostly-seated crowd. The melancholy, yet el-egant, set toured through Holloran’s quivering, sardonic delivery of lyrics that sound like every band English majors especially love, and yet Hello Shark sounds like no other band at all:

“Hamlet, you’re an idiot / I can’t believe you fell for it.”The Shark folks ended with their Roy Ayers-inspired “My Life.” Back at the MoHo, DJ Disco Phantom played “Spirit In the Sky” and Hol-loran showed up to cut a rug.

DAY THREE

By Saturday morning, the sun was out and nobody had yet been hit by a car. Brunchers ambled the sidewalks of Winooski, a squadron of leather-clad bikers drove revving through


the rotary, and the Waking Windows Artist Market was being put-up. I knew it would be a day of pleasant incongruity when a woman handed me a bucket of bricks and a chain-saw. The bricks went to stabilize the artists’ tables; the chainsaw I hid. Jaw Gems returned to offer their mellow meters for shoppers and passersby. Among the artists were PooLoop’s James Belizia, also of Blue Button and Heloise & the Savior Faire, Frances Cannon, Genese Grill, and Amy Wild, AKA Where Clothing. Dre Idle helped organize the event.

The anticipated show of the day, for many, was Ben Mayock’s solo set at the Block Gallery. Mayock, an unbelievably talented and profes-sionally trained musician, currently has a re-cording project underway that will add to his already impressive arsenal of work – though his modesty leaves many who might be inter-ested out of the loop. In the meantime, a bombardment of bands on the heavier side drew moderate, though fanatic crowds at the StopLight. The originally slotted lineup had changed significantly due to drop-outs, which turned out for the best.

“The thing that helped us most was bands cancelling,” said Reagan, whose band, Paper Castles, canceled. “We have a better under-

standing of scope for next year,” he continued. “We now know what works, what doesn’t.” Rea-gan’s observation speaks to the sheer impos-sibility of catching so many good shows on Saturday that were happening all at once. The overwhelming deluge of decisions left many festivalgoers resigned to sitting restfully and drinking at the Monkey. Amongst this crowd was Trapper Keeper, whose brief show at the StopLight attracted a fervent group of young-sters perhaps to young to know what a Trapper Keeper is. They liked the music though. 10K Volt Ghost played the Stoplight as well, led by singer/guitarist Jeff Foran’s dynamic song-writing that refuses to be anything close to catchy. Spirit Animal, whom I’ve been a fan of for years, played their goddamn hearts out. By late afternoon, the block gallery was full and Mayock was ready to play. His wry lyrics sung sternly alongside his acoustic guitar playing quickly hushed the murmuring crowd, and like anything truly great, it was over far too soon. While I regret being unable to watch Death Ves-sel, Wren and Mary, Parmaga, and Best (now Great) Western, I was fortunate enough to catch Blue Button, who headlined at the Stop-Light. Alongside Jason Cooley’s frenetic tan-

trums was a special tribute to Adam Yauch via a “So What’cha Want” cover the fallen Beastie probably would have loved. As the hectic day wound into a hectic evening, the Monkey was brimming with a crowd ex-cited to see the Blow perform. The Blow, AKA Mikhaela Yvonne Maricich, used to feature Jona Bechtolt, now of the super famous elec-tro-cult band, Yacht. As a solo artist, Maricich combines experimental songwriting with dif-ficult performance art not easily accessible to most audiences…i.e. not everybody loved her set. A highlight of the show was when Mayock sang along to a boom box he found outside. As the wave of the festival swept back into the recessed beach of Sunday morning, Win-ooski felt not unlike the aftermath of exer-cise. Alongside the exhaustion was a sense of achievement, perhaps pride, brought about via our often-dispersed local bands’ collective flex. Angio and MSR’s healthy roster of upcoming shows signifies no risk of atrophy. Stay tuned for Hess is More and Jeffery Jerusalem at the Monkey on June 27th, Futurebirds on July 6th, also at the Monkey, and perhaps even a little Mount Eerie and Zamuto. No need to wait for these shows to hear cutting-edge music, how-ever. That you can get at just by sticking your head out the window.

Below: Spirit Animal at the StopLight.Left: One of DJ Disco Phantom’s many turntables.

4018

Above: Archie’s Italian herb-marinated portobello burger.Right: The famous salmon burger.

words // margo callaghanphotos // elliot dodge debruyn

the spot


Surfboards, palm trees, and tropical fish aren’t usually the first things that come to mind when you picture land-locked Vermont, but upon entering The Spot restaurant, I found myself transported into what could easily be a post-surf, beachside food-stop. It’s the kind of place you could walk into with your shoes leaving a trail of sand behind you and no one would say a thing. Hell, you might not even be wearing shoes in the first place.

In the 1950’s, 210 Shelburne Road served as a Phillips 66 gas station. In 2008 Russ Scully was given the opportunity to bring his passions for surfing and food to the site and reinvented the building as The Spot. Evidence of Scully’s Jersey shore surfing days hang all around the restaurant, as our Waitress, Laura, would later tell us “Many of the photos on the walls are of Russ and his friends surfing… They’re pretty extreme!”

The Spot has received its share of local press last year surrounding the addition of a wind turbine on its blue and white striped batwing roof, a move which city planners felt took away from the structure’s status as one of Burlington’s historic landmarks. The objections were really about the

“fins” attached to the turbine, which are there to help the turbine reach its maximum potential for energy-production…and make it look a bit like a space-exploring droid.

Turbine drama aside, The Spot presents a carefree, laid back atmosphere conducive to family dining or a casual night out. Thread Editor, Ben Sarle and I were seated at a table next to a garage-style door that let in just the right amount of evening light. I spotted several California license plates, a painting of two red parrots, and various tribal masks as I sat down. The ample outdoor patio seating would certainly be more of a draw if it weren’t overlooking the very un-beach-like traffic on Route 7.

There’s a lot to look at in The Spot. Near the bamboo-paneled checkout counter, a large surfboard draped with Hawaiian leis displays a chalk listing of the day’s specials. Blue waves painted along the lower portion of the walls snake their way around the entirety of the restaurant. I looked past the Encyclopedia of Surfing on a table in front of me and saw a small boy peering through the glass of The Spot’s 150-gallon saltwater fish tank, gazing keenly at its finned blue and yellow residents. I wondered

words // lettie strattonimages // ben sarle

Above: Chef Leu’s unbelievable pad thai.

briefly if those same fish were on the menu, and then thought better of it.

After emerging from the kitchen to tell us that the chef would like to bring us three dishes as long as we liked seafood (we did) and didn’t mind being full (we didn’t), Restaurant Manager Jacob Smith told us that The Spot’s location makes it easily accessible for people who live and work in the area. “Our core customer base is Shelburne’s local population,” he said. “Route 7 is not usually a hub for food, but we get a lot of lunch traffic. A lot of people in suits!” Smith

continued to explain that parking is a huge draw for The Spot’s customers as well. “It’s hard to get to a place like The Farmhouse and park on a busy night,” he said. “It’s all about convenience.”

While waiting for the food, I sat back and took in The Spot’s island-style décor. The interior is plastered floor to ceiling with surfing photos. Most of the once-bare surfaces are now covered with Dakine, Roxy, Gravis, and Quiksilver stickers, conjuring images of seaside gear shacks, wetsuit rentals, and sun-streaked hair. These furnishings, coupled with the ease and

breeze of a no-stress environment, made me feel as though I were on a mini tropical vacation.

Before I could get too lost in the tropics though, the Cloudbreak Salad arrived, served with house balsamic vinaigrette atop a bed of fresh greens. The combination of grilled chicken, hard-boiled egg, bleu cheese crumbles, diced tomato, bacon, and fanned avocado slices made for the perfect appetizer on a 90+ degree day.

Had we not been sharing, I would have immediately had plate envy when our server,

Above: The Cloudbreak Salad

Don’t miss The Spot at:210 Shelburne Rd. Burlington, VT 05401802.540.1778thespotvt.com


Archie’s Grill4109 Shelburne Rd

Shelburne, VT 05482802.985.4912

archiesgrill.com

Pistou Restaurant61 Main Street

Burlington, VT 05401802.540.1783pistou-vt.com

Chef Leu’s House5761 Shelburne Rd

Shelburne, VT 05482802.985.5258chefleu.com

Shanty on the Shore181 Battery Street

Burlington, VT 05401802.864.0238

shantyontheshore.com

plans for dinner tonight?

Laura, put the Front Loop dish down in front of Ben. The crab enchiladas were served with rice, refried beans, salsa, guacamole, and sour cream, and were especially good with a dab of The Spot’s homemade pineapple habanera hot sauce (once I got up the nerve to try it, that is).

Our final (and my favorite) dish was the Peahi—two fish tacos topped with mango salsa, lettuce, red cabbage and chipotle sauce. Ben and I agreed that they’re definitely the biggest fish tacos in town, and the mango salsa paired nicely with the more muted flavor of the fish.

The rest of The Spot’s cuisine is what you would expect—plenty more options (shrimp and snapper) for the seafood lover as well as choices for the more vegetable-inclined and those who enjoy the taste of a good landlubbing animal. The menu itself is printed over a quintessentially Hawaiian image, complete with bright pink hibiscus flowers and palm trees.

Many of the dishes are named after famous surf spots or tricks—did you know that “Cloudbreak” is the go-to location in Fiji? Or that the waves at “Peahi” can be so big, the location is also known as “Jaws”? You’d be well on your way to becoming a surf spot expert after doing a little research on the menu. There’s even the option

to order online and do a drive-through pickup. Get your fish tacos to go, en route to your favorite wave-riding location!

Russ Scully’s interest in and dedication to water sports has successfully transformed this formerly forgettable gas-stop to a seriously memorable, true to its name “Spot”. Scully and his staff have created this engaging environment

in which to enjoy a low-key, tasty meal.

After eagerly eating enough food to satisfy even the most famished of surfers, Ben and I had no room for dessert. As we left, I felt relaxed and even thought I might like to try surfing at some point in life. For now though, I think I’ll stick to one or two of The Spot’s delicious fish tacos and call it a night. Surf’s up!

4022

HEY. sweet bike.WORDS & PHOTOS: Raychel Severance.INTRO PHOTO: Ben Sarle.

Fooled you! Maybe you thought this was another magazine feature on folks with pimped out fixies and bikes that cost more than the

camera used to photograph them. But what about the rest of us? We can’t all afford aero spokes, Campagnolo wheel sets, or sometimes

even a decent derailleur that’s not on the verge of breaking into a billion pieces every time we ride to the corner store for a pouch of

rolling tobacco. What about those of us whose bikes aren’t beautiful because of cosmetics, but character? Some of the bikes I see around

town are so rich with personality that it doesn’t matter that this tall bike has welds that’ve been haphazardly fixed three times or that

cruiser has a seat that looks like it was eaten by a rabid dog when it fell over one night. No, your bike won’t sell for $1000 on Craigslist,

and is kind of a piece of shit, but it’s beautiful because you made it that way. We recognize our bikes as an extension of ourselves; our

connection to a lifestyle we live, and we wear it on our sleeves and in our spokes. This, folks, is a tribute and an homage to those bikes

and their riders who don’t apologize for the bumps and bruises their rides have acquired along the way, reminding us that what really

makes a good bike is one that is simply ridden.


BEN ALESHIREBreed of bike: A two-wheeler Bike Recycle bike.

Bike’s name: Nameless, like Clint Eastwood.If you read your bike a bedtime story, what would you read it?: The Goose That Laid the Golden Egg. Or Goldilocks.

SHANNON DARBYBreed of bike: 1930s Elgin Pope.Bike’s name: Buster.If your bike was a blues musician, what would its name be?: Sweet Crank Johnson.


BEN BUCKLEYBreed of bike: A Kludge McBike.

Bike’s name: The Protest WarriorOne word: Why?: Because I love seeing the look on tractor trailer drivers’ faces.

RICHARD SIDAYBreed of bike: 1970s Raleigh Capri.Bike’s name: The Black Rider.If your bike could speak, what would it tell you?: “Ching Ching!”


COLE VanZANDTBreed of bike: 1970s Viscount frame with Shimino parts.

Bike’s name: Stripes 2.0.What’s the most awesome thing about your bike?: Coaster brake and suicide brake.

EVAN MARCHMANBreed of bike: Alpha.Bike’s name: Light Infantry.Tell us something about your bike: *spits on my recorder.* Free on gas.


JEFF McEACHERNBreed of bike: Fuji Feather.

Bike’s name: Nameless, but I always refer to her as a female.If your bike was an action hero, which one would it be?: Spiderman; gets me up and around and from here to there real quick.

BEN SARLEBreed of bike: Peugeot Marseille converted fixie.Bike’s name: Doesn’t have one.When your bike goes to the bar, what does it order?: A shot of Maker’s and a PBR.


TRAV FRYERBreed of bike: Robin Hood Cruiser.

Bike’s name: Dilly.If your bike was reincarnated as an animal, what would it be?: A sea otter.

ren.Breed of bike: Dumpstered Raleigh.Bike’s name: Matilda.If you could add anything to your bike, what would you add?: A flame thrower.


PHINN SONINBreed of bike: Penny Farthing high wheel made by the wheel man in Chattanooga, Tennessee.

Bike’s name: The Ordinary or Junkman’s Brother!Who rode your bike in its previous life?: Henry David Thoreau.

34

words // J.D. Landryimages // Ben Sarle

PizzeriaVerita


Upon entering Pizzeria Verita, I was first greet-ed by John Rao, who along with his business partner, Leslie Wells, started the restaurant with the intention of bringing authentic Neo-politan pizza to Burlington. John could not conceal his excitement for his new project and jumped right into telling me that he has trav-eled all over Italy and the east coast of the United States sampling different pizzas and re-turning home to Vermont to test out newfound ideas in his backyard clay oven. I was then in-troduced to the mustache-wearing, and per-petually smiling general manager David Abdoo who wasted no time in making sure that I had a Magic Hat Pilsner in my hand immediately and offering me appetizers before I had even been seated.

Although the sign outside reads Pizzeria Verita, once you step inside you’ve been welcomed into John’s and Leslie’s and David’s dinner party. And they want you to have it all: the sweet with the savory, the rustic with the met-ropolitan, the service of a five star restaurant with the comfort of eating at your best friends’s house. And in the true fashion of a dinner party, the buzz about Pizzeria Verita has been spread by word of mouth and social media as opposed to traditional advertising.

Above: The Spitfire SourRight: David Abdoo serves up the Cherry Amore pie Below: Kat Clear’s custom designed firewood rack

One of the first things you will see upon en-tering the restaurant is a supply of firewood stacked neatly and held together by a rack cre-ated by Kat Clear, whose handiwork you may recognize as the city’s most crowded bike rack located outside of a local Bean slinger. If you raise your gaze just a bit, you’ll see the oven that was brought over from Italy where the fire-wood meets its end at 900 degrees Fahrenheit. And in between the oven and where you stand, you are bound to see a room full of laughing and chewing and smiling faces. Lots of them, especially considering it was a Tuesday night and it was pouring rain outside. The spacious main room has four pillars con-structed from wood that was taken from the Thurston Sugar Maple House in Charlotte and dates to circa 1802. Affixed to each of the four pillars is a sconce with perforated metal again crafted by Clear. Observant folk may notice where Clear’s inspiration for the shape and

design of the lights come from if they look carefully at the Pizzeria Verita emblem on the front of the menu. Other lights, notably those hanging above the tables by the windows at the North side of the restaurant, which cast a soft yellow glow above the diners, were designed by Conant Lights of Burlington. The interior was done by JDK Design, who used metal on many surface tops, but decided to keep with an over-all rustic feel using wooden floors and barrels to achieve this. One thing that struck me about the space was how open it seemed. This is amazing considering that the restaurant was full for most of the time I was there. The tables were very well placed; it seemed like the waitstaff had no trouble maneu-vering around them and no customer appeared to be lacking in personal space. The windows that had been dry-walled over by a previous own-er have been re-exposed and restored to let in more of the dusky Vermont summer sun.

After my dining partner and I were seated, Da-vid began our night with a salad comprised of a sunrise of yellow, pink and red beets, with avocado wedges surrounding a delicate bed of microgreens. He also arranged a cheese and meat plate featuring the house-made moz-zarella which perfectly offset the saltiness of speck and marinated olives. The bartender then brought over a drink called the “Spitfire Sour”, which perfectly combines the tart of cit-rus, the spice of red pepper and a creaminess provided by egg white. After hearing of our decision to order the Sal-siccia e Rapini pie, David insisted that we try one of the night’s specials and put in an ad-ditional order for a pizza called the “Cherry Amore”. Owner John Rao’s daughter Grace takes credit for this masterpiece’s inclusion on the menu; she had discovered this concoction on a trip to New York City where she and her father were looking for pizza inspiration. The Amore features dried cherries, arugula, and hot honey drizzle. Its sweetness acted as the perfect foil to the relative spiciness of the Sal-siccia pie. One of the nice features of Verita piz-zas is that they are cut into four large slices. When folded up, the “Cherry Amore” was more sandwich than pizza, with its generous portion of greens and meat. The owners of Pizzeria Verita try to source as many ingredients from Vermont as pos-sible. The creamy burrata cheese comes from Vermont Maplebrook farms; the mozzarella is house-made. In addition, the arugula and both the fennel and hot Italian sausages are Vermont-sourced. However, to stay true to the Neapolitan recipe, San Marzano tomatoes and Antimo Caputo flour are both imported from Italy. John Rao has spent years perfecting his recipe for pizza dough before opening Verita. He claims he’s been working on it for four years; his daughter Grace will tell you it’s been seven. John’s drive for the perfect dough has paid off. It tastes light and airy which allows the flavors of the toppings to be fully realized. The menu also features three gluten-free op-tions while at least half of the pizzas on the menu are vegetarian-friendly. The beer list is extensive, with a total of 18 beers to choose from, with nine on tap and nine in bottles. Both the house red and white wines are tapped from the barrel, and can be purchased by the glass,


half carafe or full carafe. The wine list also boasts of seven white wines, nine reds, one rose and one prosecco. While American Flatbread looks to push the boundaries of the traditional American pizza with their progressive pies, Pizzeria Verita wants to offer you a taste of country you may have never been to, or if you have, then to satis-fy a taste you have longed for since leaving Italy. Together with their neighbors Trattoria Delia, Burlington now offers a nice slice of Europe on St. Paul Street. David Abdoo jokes “It’s only a matter of time before they change the name of this street to San Paulo!”

When asked if he was worried that past restau-rants located at 156 St. Paul had had trouble, Abdoo says he is not concerned. “It’s what you do with a place,” he adds. If his logic is cor-

rect, then it is true that he has nothing to worry about. He and his colleagues have not only cre-ated a space that is as comfortable in Burling-ton as it is unique to it, but they have assembled a waitstaff who provide top-notch service and are more than eager to help you get the most out of your dining experience. Watching David and John bustle around the room all night an-swering questions, listening to feedback, shak-ing hands and making recommendations, it’s hard to imagine them ever falling out of touch with their clientele.

After our feast, we had little room left for des-sert, but Abdoo would hear none of it. “You’re here, you gotta taste!” he assured us after tell-ing one of his servers to put in an order for one of their specialties - the Pizza alla Nutel-la. Yes, it is a pizza shell, that is as crispy as fennel cake but a little more substantial, that

has been drizzled with chocolate sauce and caramelized sugar. And yes, it is even more delicious than it sounds. To cap off the night, I ordered the Green Mountain Mojito, which features rum, cinnamon, maple, lime, and of course, mint and makes for another terrific melange of spicy, sweet and tart.

A restaurant run by people with so much pas-sion for serving up delicious, healthy food and enthusiasm for constant refinement of their craft seems built to last. Pizzeria Verita is poised to carve out a niche in a city that up until now has never had anything like it. With its rev-erence for the culinary traditions of Italy, and its love and appreciation of Vermont’s agricul-ture, it looks as if Pizzeria Verita is well on its way to becoming a Burlington institution.

Above: Pizza alla Nutella

“It’s only a matter of time before they change the name of this street to San Paulo!”

DAVID ABDOO

Left: A salad comprised of a sunrise of yellow, pink and red beets, with avocado wedges surrounding a delicate bed of microgreens

tjdonovan

words // zach despartimage // ben sarle

On a rainy Saturday evening in Burling-ton’s South End, Chittenden County State’s Attorney TJ Donovan stands in a living room in front of about twenty friends, fam-ily, and supporters. Donovan is vying to be Vermont’s next attorney general — the top law enforcement officer in the state.

The event is informal and relaxed (Dono-van’s two-year-old son, Jack, strikes keys and random on the piano behind him until being scooped up by Donovan’s wife, Jess), but the candidate pays no mind. Despite the loose setting, Donovan’s tone is seri-ous. He speaks for about fifteen minutes. He sounds prepared — rehearsed but not stale; brief but cogent. After all, this isn’t his first foray into politics; he’s twice been elected to his current office.

His remarks are well-received, but these aren’t the folks he has to persuade — it’s Vermonters across the state who need convincing, many of whom have never heard of Donovan, much less know any-thing about him. In the only major poll of the race thus far, a sampling done in May by the Castleton Institute for WCAX-TV, 49 percent of respondents said they would vote for Sorrell in the Democratic Primary. Donovan polled at 23 percent, while a quarter of respondents were un-

decided. Rich Carlson, the polling director at the Castleton Institute, noted that many of those polled didn’t know who Donovan was.

Donovan, 38, faces an uphill battle in his bid to unseat seven-term incumbent Wil-liam Sorrell in the Democratic primary Aug. 28. Sorrell has served as attorney general since being appointed by Gov. Howard Dean in 1997.

While being separated in age by a quarter century, the two men have had curiously similar careers. Both are natives of Burl-ington born into political families. Both re-turned to the Queen City after law school and rose through the ranks of the Chit-tenden County State’s Attorney’s office to become its chief prosecutor.

While other statewide incumbents are facing only token opposition (Secretary of State Jim Condos is running unopposed), the AG’s contest is shaping up to be the must-watch race of the summer. If the last few weeks are any indication, neither candidate will emerge from the campaign unscathed. Shortly before this issue went to print, an anonymous source leaked to Seven Days that Donovan had been charged with aggravated assault twenty

years ago in connection with a drunken fight on Church Street. Donovan plead to a lesser charge and the incident was ex-punged from his record, Seven Days re-ported. Sorrell denied any involvement with the leak.

The candidates have refrained thus far from criticizing each other publicly, but it appears the gloves will come off as the race heads into the summer. There are less than 90 days until the primary.

Thread Magazine sat down with TJ Dono-van to talk politics, family, basketball and beer.

Why are you running for attorney general?

I think it’s time for a change. I think it’s time for a debate about the attorney gen-eral’s office; without debate there’s no democracy. Vermont is facing new chal-lenges and with that we need new energy. I

38


think there are a lot of good things we can do. This is going to be a tough race, and I’ll go anywhere and do anything it takes to win. I’m gonna work the shoe leather and knock on doors and talk to people. I drove down to Rutland at 5:30 this morning to speak at the Rotary Club so I could make it back to Burlington for work. That’s what it’s going to take.

What do you think of the WCAX poll that put you down 25 points to Bill Sorrell?

I think it’s significant that Bill Sorrell, the seven term incumbent, polled at less than 50 percent. That means this race is win-nable. There are a lot of undecided voters in this race.

Do you the results would be different if that poll were held today?

Absolutely. It’d be a lot closer if it were held today.

Could you talk about the significance of the endorsement by the Vermont Sher-iff’s Association?

It’s an honor to be endorsed by the Ver-mont sheriffs’ and troopers’ unions. They’re looking to build a strong relation-ship with the state’s top cop, and I’m proud to have their support.

I’ve also been endorsed by Dick Sears, the chair of the Senate Judiciary Committee, as well as the mayors of Rutland, Barre and Winooski and 160 attorneys across the state.

Do you think that Bill Sorrell has done a poor job fighting to close Vermont Yan-kee?

I’m not going to second-guess what Bill did. It’s a legal case and right now it’s on appeal. What I will say is that I will fight to protect the Vermont taxpayer. I’m no nu-

clear power expert, but the oldest nuclear power plant in the world is 44 years old. Vermont Yankee is 40. It’s not going to run for another 20 years. We have to look at the end game and protect Vermont’s se-curity. It’s important to ensure that Enter-gy Louisiana, the company that owns the plant, fully funds the decommissioning fund, which is only partially funded now.

How does your experience prepare you to be the attorney general?

As the head of the Chittenden County state’s attorney’s office, we’ve won every major case we’ve brought to trial — the conviction of Brian Rooney for the murder of Michelle Gardner-Quinn, Timothy Dowd for the DUI murder of Kaye Borneman, Mi-chael Lewis on two counts of manslaughter.

Could you talk about the rapid interven-tion community court program, which you helped implement?

We have to take a public health model — holding people accountable, but giv-ing them the opportunity to re-do. The recidivism rate is 40-50 percent, and a lot of these issues are drug-related. The program diverts non-violent offenders to mental health or substance abuse coun-seling, and eases the burden on the cor-rections system. We’ve had success with it here in Chittenden County, and Governor Shumlin wants to implement it statewide.

We need to identify people for screening; we need to create care and accountability. We’ve had success with the program — an 80 percent compliance rate in the first 18 months. It’s also an issue of fairness — unlike poverty, substance abuse and men-tal illness don’t discriminate. Crime and corrections reform were big issues in the 2010 gubernatorial race. Do you think they will be again this election? They’re important issues. This recession brings new challenges. We must change how we operate, and produce outcomes in a more efficient way. Do you think that’s a third rail issue? Crime? Absolutely. I give Governor Shum-lin tons of credit - most politicians are afraid of looking soft on crime. We have to build infrastructure on the front end. I want to be a partner to the governor on that issue.

It’s time to be tough on crime but also smart on crime — we can’t arrest our way out of the problem. We have to find the best practices for enforcement. We need to bring in the medical community, bring in social services, discuss treatment op-tions, open methadone clinics. It’s about intervention and prevention — we need to get to the root of the problem.

We have to reform the criminal justice system. We have 14 different counties with 14 different ways of approaching crime. That’s something I would address as at-torney general.

The last couple years with the economic recession I was in these meetings with

all these different state boards, county vs. county. Why is Bennington doing it one way? Why is Chittenden doing it one way? How do we develop a consistent approach? And we were spinning our tires. There’s only one person in this state that can uti-lize that statewide jurisdiction and build that consensus and implement the best practices, and that’s the attorney general.

And this was really a time when it was county vs. county. This is really about leadership. It’s about utilizing technol-ogy, it is about having those partnerships so we share resources. It is really about coming up with new ideas to address new challenges in the 21st century. When I was in these meetings it was clear to me

– the top cop/chief law enforcement officer needs to be involved and needs to be lead-ing on these issues. Do you think that the winner of this race will be determined in the Democratic pri-mary? Do you think any Republican can-didate would be inconsequential?

This primary is the race, for all intents and purposes. No Republican has filed to be a candidate yet.

(Editor’s note: since this interview was conducted, Republican Jack McMullen de-clared his candidacy.) Does that make the campaign tougher for you, since it effectively shortens the race by two months? That, coupled with lower turnout in the primary compared to the general? It definitely informs our strategy — you have to be skillful in getting out the vote. This is a changing world — I don’t think our generation will accept the way things have always been done. We struggle with who can afford a starter home, if that even ex-ists anymore, and how to pay to back stu-

dent loans. How do we attract new jobs to Vermont? This is about the future — safety, infra-structure. Public safety equals economic development. It’s as simple as that. We have to do more with less. The traditional method isn’t working. Safety keeps people in Vermont.

You’re 27 years younger than your oppo-nent. Do you think the young vote will be critical for you?

Obviously, we want a high turnout in the primary. I need young people to vote; it’s always important for young people to par-ticipate. A lot of our efforts will be getting out the vote.

Have you always seen yourself working in public service? You were in private practice and then you left to work in the state’s attorney’s office six years ago.

I love being a prosecutor. It’s a really re-warding job because you can help a lot of people. There’s a lot of interaction with people from all walks of life, policy issues, obviously legal issues. Some of the stories you deal with truly are stranger than fic-tion. There’s never been a dull moment — it’s been a great lesson in crisis manage-ment. Usually you have a crisis by 8:30 every day. You learn how to lead and you learn how to manage and delegate, and you learn how to get things done.

You learn to set priorities. When you talk about a vision, you gotta say “well, this is important.” We can do these ten things in a day, but what’s the one thing we have to be committed to over the course of the next six months to a year to really make a difference? That all goes back to the com-munity court thing. I’ve seen people in and out of the criminal justice system time and time again. Some of these people I grew

“You could be walking around lucky and not even know it.”

LET IT RIDE / 1989


up with here in Burlington. And the de-mographic was kind of poor, uneducated, lacking jobs. We need to work to address these issues, like substance abuse and mental illness.

I’ll be clear — I didn’t come up with these ideas myself. This was a lot of different people at the table talking and looking at what other national organizations and ju-risdictions do. But it’s being able to look to the future and say, “this is what we want it to look like.” Change is easy to talk about; implementation is damn hard.

Do you think that Bill Sorrell hasn’t done an adequate job setting priorities?

I can’t speak to what Bill has or hasn’t done. I’m running for the office, I’m not running against Bill.

Can you talk about your family and how they helped make the decision to run for attorney general?

My wife, Jess, works at the Howard Cen-ter. She’s a mental health counselor/ cli-nician. We have a son, Jack, and another child on the way. The challenge that a lot of young people in the state are facing, we’re facing too. I worry about my mort-gage, I worry about taxes, I worry about daycare costs and student loan payments. But I’m also committed to public service. And so there’s a tension there sometimes because nobody’s gonna get rich in this business.

Jess has been a great partner and was very supportive of my candidacy. And our values are the same and she believes in what I’m doing, and knows that I’m do-ing it for the right reasons. She’s been my greatest partner and my greatest ad-vocate. She’s been a tremendous help on the campaign and in my life. I wouldn’t be doing this without her.

Are you worried about not being able to have a full-time campaigning schedule with a young child and another on the way?

I’m middle class. I’ve gotta work. I mean, there’s just no other way around it. My family is always going to come first. It goes family, work, campaign.

Why did you want to be a lawyer? Did you

want to follow in your father’s footsteps?

My father was a lawyer, other family members were lawyers. I love history and have always been interested in politics. If I wasn’t a lawyer I’d be teaching high school history and coaching basketball. (Chuckling) I sometimes say to myself

“Why didn’t I do that?”

My father was a lawyer who represented regular folks. He represented people who didn’t have a lot of money but needed help. He never made a lot of money, but there was great honor in that work. I want to be the people’s lawyer. I want to represent the middle class and I want to represent the working class, and I want to help the poor in this state.

I was always drawn to the aspect of public service, of what you can do with a law de-gree. You can do a lot of good — I saw my father help a lot of people. And that really resonated with me. Plus, I was no good at math or science. So it was kind of a path of least resistance!

What does TJ Donovan do when he’s not in a suit somewhere downtown?

I spend time with my wife and son. I spend a lot of time at the park. If I do have a free minute I love to read history. I love to golf, but haven’t been in quite some time. I love to run — I’ve done two marathons.

Did you do the Vermont City Marathon last month?

Nope. No time to train. I’ll tell you, I’m re-ally kind of a boring person. I work, I go home and I spend time with my family. If I get a chance to golf or run or play basket-ball, I’ll do it. I love to walk to work — a great way to start and end the day. I wish I was more exciting!

What’s on your iPod?

Johnny Cash. Willy Nelson. What I’m into right now, been checking them out on Pan-dora… English band… “Little Lion Man.”

Mumford & Sons.

Yeah. And just to show my generation… Pearl Jam. Love Pearl Jam. Love Eddie [Vedder]. That documentary — Pearl Jam: 20. It’s unbelievable. Gets you fired up. I

mean, how old are you guys?

Ben Sarle: 28Zach Despart: 22

Jesus. So my time was in the early nineties – it was a great time for music. It was Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Alice In Chains. I still love that music.

What’s your favorite bar downtown? Do you go out a lot?

I’m getting too old. After work, we’ll either go to Finnegan’s or… what’s that wine bar? Drink.

Favorite Ben & Jerry’s flavor?

Coffee Heath Bar Crunch.

Beer?

Switchback.

Big basketball fan?

Huge. NBA and college. Go Celts. [Rajon] Rondo — best point guard in the league.

Which do you prefer to watch, college or NBA?

Regular season, definitely college. I like March Madness, but I love the NBA play-offs.

I can’t stand the NBA regular season.

Ugh. It’s unbearable.

What’s the last concert you’ve been to?

Avett Brothers, out in Essex Junction. I think it was last year.

Favorite movie?

One of the movies that I love, and you probably haven’t heard of it, is Let It Ride. Richard Dreyfuss. It’s about horse racing, and that’s why my dad loved it. We would go to Saratoga every year. There’s a re-ally famous line from that movie — “you can be walking around lucky and not even know it.”

Does that describe yourself?

(Laughs) We’ll find out August 28.

DAIRY DIARYA BURLINGTON CREEMEE TOUR

words // john flanaganphotos // ben sarle

Creemee, cree-mee, or creamee, soft serve it is not. Perhaps nothing gets the collective goat of some Vermont-ers as does misidentifying the beloved dairy snack (usually vanilla, unless they have maple) swirled from a stainless steel machine into a sugar cone and smattered with a mantle of sprinkles (usually rainbow).

“Isn’t that soft serve?” you ask in your foreign tongue.

“Nope,” says Vermont. “That’s a creemee.

Whatever it’s called, a dispute circles the creemee origin. Both Carvel and Dairy Queen claim to have invented the ice cream-lite formula. Per the former, founder Tom Carvel realized in 1945 that customers actually liked goopy ice cream, after his truck broke down in Hartsdale, New York. DQ claims founders J.F. McCullough and his son, Alex, sold 1,600 soft servings in the two hours after they invented “the queen of dairy products” for-mula in Moline, Illinois – four years after Carvel’s happy accident.

“Creemee,” the almost gross bumpkinism reminiscent of sim-pler times, is alleged to connote a product with higher butter-fat content, hence, a creamier swirl. Not so these days, howev-er. Those who grew up eating creemees in Vermont have most likely been eating the same formula as the kids who ate soft serve in Massachusetts. The generic recipe includes soft serve mix (usually Hood) refrigerated at -3 degrees Celsius (almost ten degrees lower than ice cream) and blasted with air before curling out from the machine (usually a Taylor).

“The creemee is like a weird, mythological concept,” said Vermont-born Johanna Parkers, who now lives in Denver with her husband, Travis – also from Vermont. “People in Denver don’t believe anyone would call it that.”

The Parkers, who rarely eat soft serve in Denver, added they enjoy a novelty creemee indulgence whenever they visit their parents back home. The Parkers stood outside Al’s French Frys’ ice cream stand on a recent rainy day.

Ice Cream Bob’s Snack Shack

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Al’s French Fries

Chubby Muffin

“The creemee is not really something we look forward to,” Mr. Parker said.

Al’s was stop five on Thread’s two-day taste test of Burling-ton’s most notorious creemees. From the three Taylor ma-chines sitting side-by-side behind the counter at Al’s, Thread chose the mint with chocolate sprinkles. The Al’s creemee is a creamier creemee than others. It’s our guess that a milk fat higher than the 5% norm has something to do with it, though a young, red-shirted and black-smocked ice cream purveyor there could not confirm our suspicions.

Thread’s creemee tour began with a classic chocolate and vanilla mix bedaubed with rainbow sprinkles from the Chubby Muffin, on 88 Oak Street. A girl named Tashina, who had been working the counter, called over a tired looking cook from the kitchen to execute a photo-worthy swirl.

“I usually just make ‘em huge,” Tashina said as she watched her indifferent coworker fill an Eat-It-All cone with careless perfection.

Benjy Adler, the Chubby Muffin’s owner, boasts his are some of the finest creemees in town. Adler cites his not-so-secret weapon as the local, all natural creemee mix he uses, pro-vided by the St. Albans Cooperative Creamery.

“Do you see the chocolate specks in there?” Adler asked of Thread’s first creemee. Thread saw them, and they were good.

“Most people just use Hood,” Adler continued, “and if it isn’t Hood, it’s even worse.”

Uniquely, the Chubby Muffin creemee-making process doesn’t involve a Taylor creemee machine, though the brand name of Adler’s machine is missing.

“Most creemee machines are between 25,000 and 30,000 dol-lars,” Adler said, “I got this one at a reasonable price from a guy in Massachusetts.”

“Doesn’t that make it a soft serve machine?” Thread asked.

“No,” Adler said.

Our next stop was Burlington Bay, whose maple “cree-mee” ma-chine was broken. Ericka, a BB staffer, recommended the black raspberry with chocolate sprinkles (“A very popular combina-tion”). Thread asked which flavor was most popular and Ericka fired off “maple” before the question was finished. She handed out our medium purchase, made from a Garelick Farms mixture, and snapped closed the window so as not to let in the rain.

“Did Burlington Bay tell you they use real Vermont maple syrup?” asked Gabby, who was selling “creamees” from Ice Cream Bob’s snack shack near the waterfront. Gabby, wear-ing an oversized Wild Life shirt, was more than happy to dish on her geographically closest competitor. Ice Cream Bob’s displays a gallon of all-natural maple syrup from Sheldon, VT on their trackside counter.

“People complain because our maple creemees don’t look like they have maple syrup in them,” Gabby said. “But that’s because

unlike some places, we don’t use dye.” Gabby said Bob’s recipe calls for 18 ounces of maple syrup mixed into a vanilla base.

“The hard part is affording the maple,” she said. “It’s like, sixty bucks a gallon. By the end of the summer they say it could be seventy five.”

Thread ordered the maple and Gabby offered samples of Bob’s raspberry, which is also made from local, all-natural ingre-dients. Both were good, though the rich maple left a stomach already busy digesting two creemees feeling less than stupen-dous. The too-sugary rainbow sprinkles were no help.

Tyler Van Liew, Bluebird Tavern Coffee Stop’s creemee expert, dished out the zenith of creemee holiness before the close of day one.

Any Venetian who prefers the traditional gelato spoonful beneath her short espresso may scoff at the Bluebird afogato (Italian for “drowned”), but the creemee substitute is fair enough. Van Liew, whose parents once ran a Ben & Jerry’s Scoop Shop, uses 10% milk fat for his signature creemees, which classifies them, technically, as ice cream. He doctors his Hood mix base by adding cream and chocolate flakes to the

chocolate, and by sprucing his vanilla bean with vanilla paste, “Just to up the ante and get a little of that sparkle in there.”

Van Liew handed Thread two cups of the pseudo-Italian dessert. “Voilà, Afogati!” he said, “That’s our plural.”

As we shoveled down the goods, Van Liew told us about a recent bike trip he took with some friends to Charlotte.

“We had some raw milk from a mother who had just had a cow two days prior. The milk still had the colostrum in it. It was yellow and custardy. I don’t do dairy, really, but I was being po-

...the zenith of creemee holiness...

Burlington Bay

lite. I drank a pint of it. Then I biked home in 80-degree weather and it turned into butter. It was wild.”

Thread called it a day after that and switched to Switchback, instead.

After Al’s, round two took us to Beansie’s Bus, known to any New North End resident as the slow canary yellow school bus you get stuck behind at quitting time, famous for their Michigans. Owner Jay LaShombe, who inherited the bus, said Beansie’s has been around since 1944, though they’ve served creemees for only thirteen or fourteen years.


Bluebird Kiosk

Beansie’s

The Beansie’s creemee is the most straightforward, gimmick-less creemee in town. Chocolate. Vanilla. No sprinkles.

“It’s not an issue that we don’t have sprinkles,” LaShombe said.

When asked about the popularity between chocolate and vanilla, LaShombe said it’s an easy win: “Vanilla, 5:1.”

Like Bluebird, Beansie’s bulks up the milk fat, though unlike Van Liew, LaShombe keeps his around eight or nine percent. To Thread, Beansie’s creemee tasted colder, though the torrential rain thundering beyond the bus’s canopy may have influenced our analysis.

Thread’s creemee safari ended with the locale considered a “must” for any worthy creemee tour.

Under QTEE’s blue awning, on N. Winooski, ice cream wiz Rachel, a Communications major at Stonehill College in

Massachusetts, dipped our final creemee into a vat of toasted coconut. The mixture beneath burst through the edible shellac and had to be eaten quickly. The cone, wrapped in American flag paper, was somewhat stale.

As the Parkers pointed out at Al’s, creemees exist more as a cherished quirk than as a product of quality. Like the greasy burgers, dogs, and fries they’re often served subsequent to, creemees represent an American diet held dear by some for its resistance to change, its obstinacy against – or ignorance of – good health. The creemee is the Marlboro man of the dairy kingdom. Unless evolved à la Benjy Adler’s all-natural approach, or whipped into style as in Bluebird’s way, judging a better creemee is like judging which McDonald’s franchise makes a better Big Mac. The psychological cravings outweigh the nutritional ones, and loving creemees means nothing in the realm of nuance. Our conclusion? Unless it’s drowned in espresso, a creemee is a cree-mee is a creamee.

The creemee is the Marlboro man of the dairy kingdom.QTee’s

91 College Street, Burlington, VT | 860.1003 | dunkielsaunders.com

At Dunkiel Saunders, we’re committed to helping Vermont’s creative economy

thrive. From startup to financing to protecting your brand, we provide the legal

services individuals, organizations, and companies need to succeed and grow.

We help new enterprises emerge, small businesses grow, and large companies stay strong.

Making a difference is our practice.

thread magazine | summer 2012 | threadvt.com42 91 College Street, Burlington, VT | 860.1003 | dunkielsaunders.com

At Dunkiel Saunders, we’re committed to helping Vermont’s creative economy

thrive. From startup to financing to protecting your brand, we provide the legal

services individuals, organizations, and companies need to succeed and grow.

We help new enterprises emerge, small businesses grow, and large companies stay strong.

Making a difference is our practice.

barista’s grind

coffee grindopen signring up rhymes morning timepeach sconesinging tonescounter zoneringing phoneegg and cheesemouths to feedsmile please moving feethurried voicesmany choicespizza slicespay in pricesmilk soyskim orwholeservice roledoughnut holebusiness planbiggest fanworkers banmenu grandorder takerpleasant fakersmoke breakbussin plateslatte make workin latemore to dosoup to stewcoffee brew make it thrutiredhungrymaking moneyfill the honeyweather sunnypaycheckfloor swepttoddler mess do my bestfind my flowworkers glowkiddos knowApril snowketchupclean uporder upring me upsoup to stewcoffee brewshift is thru!coffee brew!brew, brew, brew

Madeleine Liebman

illustration by zelde grimm


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