the vent magazine oct 2012 issue

3www.TheVentNation.com [email protected]

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It’s that time of year again Corpus Christinos, time to throw some paint on your face, and wander around aimlessly scaring the crap out of people. No, it’s not the annual black-face-a-thon over at the Harbor Playhouse… I am of course referring to the fact that it is undeniably- Zombie Time!

It’s time for Zombie walking… Zombie Prom-ing… Zombie trick-or-treating… and lets not forget the most important Zombie Voting.

That’s right Vent Nation, this month’s homework is to do your civic duty by voting on November 6th in full zombie makeup. Remember, pictures, or it didn’t really happen.

It is high time we show these politicians that Zombies used to be people too... and we expect them to court our vote the same way they do Latinos, or women, or any one of those other pre-zombie groups.

Zombies are not that different from the rest of you citizens. We want a lot of the same things everyone else wants… and if you want the Zombie vote, then here is a list of what we are looking for:

1. For starters, I think most of us can agree that Same-Zombie-Marriage is long over due. Those of you fighting this are stuck in an oppressive past.

2. For obvious reasons we’d like to see

less guns on the street.As for healthcare… well, it’s a little too late for that.

3. Zombies would also like to see a resurgence of the middle class. It’s virtually impossible to get into these gated communities to eat the upper class, and to be honest, lower class brains just aren’t what they used to be. They are down right disgusting these days. I blame the failing education system. In short, the Zombie population is growing by the bite, and we will no longer be ignored or overlooked. You all know that old Zombie protest

chant…join in if you support this very slow and unorganized movement.

What do we want? Brains! When do we want em? BRAAAAAINS!!!!

-formerly Will Vent

Wake Up & Die by William Henneberger

4twitter.com/theventnation facebook.com/TheVentNation

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Dear Will Vent, Don’t think I don’t see you every morning driving into the side parking lot to drop off your brat kid at school. THERE IS A SYSTEM IN PLACE! You have to wait in line like every other parent, and you can drop off your kid when I tell my 4th grade minions to let you into the driveway. I am the mother***ing king of this school zone, DO YOU GET THAT! How dare you even question my authority! Do not even look in my direction until you hear me blow my whistle, you inferior piece of crap. All of you “college graduates”, with your “office jobs” and your “expense accounts” and “double Windsors”… well from 7:45 until 8:15, you are all my b*tches. That’s right…GO…Now STOP! GO ON, what are you waiting for. STOP! Oh, hi Mrs. Ramirez. Good Morning. Of course you go right in… you fine a$$ mother I’d like t--- BEEEEEEP. WHAT THE FU… I know you didn’t honk at me from that ghetto POS. Looks like your kid is gonna be late today.

STOP,CCISD Janitor/ Crossing Guard Specialist

Dear Corpus Christi Clear Channel Radio Stations,I want you to be locked in a car stuck in crosstown traffic and forced to listen to your own ads. Then you can be the judge of what is more annoying: The Gen X Slacker Guy on the I Heart Radio commercials, the dude with the horrible Boston accent for DeeVeeeAwwwhhhrrr’s the Hawwwppuh, or the ads featuring people who sound like they barely know English claiming “I was on my way home when someone stepped on my leetle toe. Wang Wright got me two hundet tenthy five thousand pesos.” They’re all asinine, all based on stereotypes and the worst fucking ads I’ve ever heard in my life. You wanna know how fast I change over to The Shark when those ads are on? Faster than you can say easy target.

Signed,the only person in Corpus Christi to graduate high school and college without getting pregnant----ever.Or maybe just the only person in Corpus to graduate college. JJL

Dear Will Vent, I want to congratulate you on not making this entire issue about Sons of Anarchy. I know you finally watched it for the first time this month and now you’ve been glued to your computer watching the first 4 seasons non-stop. Let me also warn you, that you may start to feel like you have what it takes to join a Motorcycle Club… You do not.I know you think you are pretty bada$$ after putting a note on that car that took up two spots in the HEB parking lot, or when you were speaking at full volume in the library last week. I say, good for you man, but don’t mistake this bravado with the swagger needed to really be in an MC. I know you have been calling your friends “brother” for years know, and your wife, I mean old lady, hasn’t made you cry in over 4 months, but there is just more to it than that. I will say that I was impressed by how you drank that expired milk the other day just before tearing the label off of your mattress. That’s a good start, but just take it slow and let it happen naturally.

Best, Jackson T.

Letters to the Ed [email protected]


Police Rid Neighborhood of Meth Lab by William HennebergerCitizens in Flour Bluff can

rest easy, now that CCPD along with I.C.E. Agents have cleared an area trailer park of a very dangerous meth Lab. The meth Labrador, had been a problem for people in that neighborhood for just over a month, making it

unsafe for children to play outside, and causing general awkwardness for those who live in the vicinity. Policewerefirstcalledouta week ago, after an anonymous report that the animal was seen licking its genitals in plain sight of occupants of the trailer park.

A ticket was issued and while no arrests were made, police remained on high alert.

Then, early this morning CCPD received several calls reporting the meth Lab was tweaking near the empty trailer park pool. Over a dozen witnesses say the drug-addled beast was seen vomiting several times and then eating said vomit. Authorities moved in quickly and were able to subdue the animal with little effort after

using tranquilizer rifles, pepperspray and a series of beatings.

“We’s just glad it’s gone, you know,” said Bob Morris, a nearby resident, “this ain’t no place for something like that. It’s dangerous, is what it is, what with all the kids around.”

The meth Lab has been detained by Corpus Christi animal control, where if it is not adopted within half an hour, it will be put down. V


Guy who Killed Himself on Fox News: 1979 – 2012

Why? Whhhhyyyyy? Jodon Romero, you are dead to me! You killed yourself on Fox News and now I can’t stop watching the clip on Youtube. Not the whole clip, mind you, but just the 3 seconds between 1:34 and 1:37, where you off yourself. Over and over again. I went through my ‘Faces of Death’ phase years ago and I did not need to be pulled back into the morbid curiosity of my youth. You are dead to me- for causing me to analyze the resolve with which you took your own life, and for burning that image into my memory, desensitizing me almost to the point of madness, bringing me one step closer to carjacking some teenager and ending up just like you, thus completing the cycle of death you have put in place. V

Dead to Me Obituary

Congressman claims 47% of Democrats Ride the Short Bus by William Henneberger

Congressman Blake Farenthold is taking heat from his party after the release of a video in which he makes offensive remarks about American Democrats. The now widespread clip was recorded two years ago at a pajama

p a r t y fundraiser.

I n the clip Farenthold address an elite group of scantily c l a d w o m e n , s a y i n g , “It’s really no use t r y i n g

to convince democrats of anything, 47% of them are already riding the short bus.” He continues, “All we can really do is tell those little democrat fellas they’re doing the best they can and maybe hand them out a cookie or a juice box.”

This comes in the wake of several gaffes, by a number of different Texas republicans. Last week Senator John Cornyn was overheard saying that 47% of the new Ben Folds Five album is derivative bullsh*t. While earlier this month, Governer Rick Perry, commented to his barber that, “47% of Jews have, black people hair.”

So far, the blowback from these comments has caused a dip in support from voters in the decent human being community. While support among a**holes continues to increase. V


Halloween is shaping up to be more than just a night of terrifying ghouls, horror films, and toilet papering your neighbors dog. Yes, this year, it is shaping up to be an entire month of butthole-puckering, fear induced, possibilities. With the opening of Fright Night haunted house, running throughout October and early November, you can spend your weekend freaking out your kids, significant other, or even yourself (if you’re into that sort of thing). The best part? It’s the kind of fun that get’s you out of the house, without the likelihood of going to jail! Also, you might get some great makeup tips from it if you can keep your eyes open! We here at Vent Nation, sat down with, Brandon G. the BRAAAAIIIINNNNSSSS, behind the whole operation, to ask him some questions about what we can all look forward to.

How long has this bad boy been going on?

Fright Night haunted house was established in 1985 and over the years has evolved from the mind of its creator, Brandon Gonzalez, as one of the most recognized haunts in south Texas, with 3 all new haunts for the 2012 season and the all new coffin simulator ride. You cant miss it this year!!!

Tell us about your association with the Zombie Walk.

We are one of the main sponsors for the zombie walk, it was a no brainer, (Authors note: this was not intended as a pun, but we will accept it as so...), when the idea was bouncing around, that we should be the ending spot for the zombie walk . October 13th zombies will invade Corpus

Christi ending at the fright night haunted house and merging with the monsters and motorcycles party we are hosting with Harley Davidson. It wil be a great time!!!!

Give us two or three spoilers or facts about the house that maybe we didn’t know.

Many people think we start building in september for the season but we started building fright night in January. Also, we can use close to 50 gallons of blood per season, and working in a haunted house is fun, but one of the most demanding jobs you will ever have. Our actors train for a month before we start.

Can we expect to be manhandled at this event, or is it strip club rules? (No touching?)

Hmm!!! You wont be touched on purpose... It might happen though. It’s dark and monsters dont like rules (but they are working on it),

Have you ever had anyone pee pee their pants, or perhaps burst into tears?

Peeing your pants is common at fright night also anything else that can come out of a human when they are scared has come out. We have a crew that does nothing but clean up when this happens and they are busy all night!

Will there be a real chainsaw involved in the haunted house?You will have to wait and see...

On a scale of 1-10, how scary are we talkin’ here?

We are one of the scariest haunts in America, and have been featured on the travel channel and Americas Top Haunts.

Do you have any tips for people coming to the Fright Night?

Come out early to avoid lines, our peak times are 9pm-11pm, and on weekends.

Any advice for parents or kids in particular?

Parents love to scare the kids they often try to scare there kids in the haunt and do our job for us before they get in , we apprieciate the help but we can assure you we dont need it.

Is this event baby appropriate?

If you want to stay up with your children all night because they are to scared to sleep...

Will we get dirty?

They are 4d haunts so you will have to see. It just depends what paths you take and what you do.

If you had to compare this particular haunted house, to a horror film, which would it be and why?

Fright Night haunted house could be compared to tons of horror films. We take inspiration from horror films. Our new zombie outbreak is like walking into a hollywood film, and you might even feel like you’re in it. If you like horror, 6 Floors of Hell is a total nightmare most people wont make it through the first hall. Pitch Black is a must this year... a fan favorite, but I can’t give out details. You will just have to see it for yourself! For more details, visit us online at imnotgoinginthere.com or facebook.com/frightnighthauntedhouses.

See Ad on the next page for more details.

Corpus Christi’s Award Winning Haunt: Fright Night Interview by Kat McCloud

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Acoustic Monday -Collin Roche Free 10 Pm-House of Rock

Clarissa Serna Full Band -RevolutionOpen Mic Night W/ Rev Matt Martinez 8 Pm Free-House of RockMureau, Hanging A Horse Thief, Burn The Watchtower, Fed Of Me-Zeros

102.3 The Planet Dj Arod And Dj Et -RevolutionBeer Wednesday W/ Art Barrera 10pm Free-House of RockCountry Star Contest -Exec. Surf ClubSte’von, DJ Dus, Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

Latin Rock Los Tatuajes -RevolutionTexas Heat Wave Car Show -Amer. Bank Cntr.DeeJay Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s


Clarissa Serna Full Band -RevolutionOpen Mic Night W/ Rev Matt Martinez 8 Pm Free-House of Rock

102.3 The Planet Dj Arod And Dj Et -RevolutionBeer Wednesday With Gravy 10pm Free-House of RockCountry Star Contest -Exec. Surf ClubSte’von, DJ Dus, Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

King Conquer, Thick As Blood, Hardside, Delusions Leaders $12 Adv/ $14 Dos 6Pm-House of Rock Latin Rock Los Tatuajes -RevolutionRealms Con -Amer. Bank Cntr.DeeJay Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

Acoustic Monday -Collin Roche Free 10 Pm -House of Rock

Clarissa Serna Full Band -RevolutionNonpoint & Taproot w/ Black Oxygen-Brewster St.Open Mic Night W/ Rev Matt Martinez 8 Pm Free-House of Rock

102.3 The Planet Dj Arod And Dj Et -RevolutionCountry Star Contest -Exec. Surf ClubFor Today, Impending Doom, The Chariot, Texas In July 6 Pm $16 Adv/ $18 Dos-House of RockSte’von, DJ Dus, Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

Skeletonwitch, Havok, Mutilation Rites, Killamora-ZerosCorpus Christi Icerays Vs Amarillo Bulls -Amer. Bank Cntr.Latin Rock Los Tatuajes -RevolutionTeenage Bottlerocket, Smoke Or Fire, Masked Intruders, Spanish Reds 7 Pm $12-House of RockDeeJay Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s


Clarissa Serna Full Band -RevolutionOpen Mic Night W/ Rev Matt Martinez 8 Pm Free-House of RockTheory of a Deadman w/ Adelita’s Way & Charm City Devils-Brewster St.ALL GIRL PUNK ROCK BANDS! Vanilla Sugar Elect Trick City, Mrs. Howl-Zeros

102.3 The Planet Dj Arod And Dj Et -RevolutionAmerican Aquarium, Albert Simpson Beer School-House of RockCountry Star Contest -Exec. Surf ClubSte’von, DJ Dus, Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

Ballabajoomba Poetry Slam7 Pm Free-House of RockLatin Rock Los Tatuajes -RevolutionDeeJay Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

The Sword, Eagle Claw, Gyspyhawk $17 7 Pm-House of Rock

Attila, Make Me Famous, Ice Nine Kills, Aderstria 6 Pm $16-House of RockClarissa Serna Full Band -Revolution

102.3 The Planet Dj Arod And Dj Et -RevolutionCountry Star Contest -Exec. Surf ClubHobo & Free Hotdogs -House of RockSte’von, DJ Dus, Bobby Stump- Flanagan’s

Corpus Christi Icerays Vs Texas Tornado - Amer. Bank Cntr.Live DJ -Exec. Surf ClubReverend Horton Heat, The Supersuckers Not In The Face, Piñata Protest, Switchblade Jesus, Battle Of The Bands Winner Tba 7 Pm $20-House of RockTurnpike Troubadours w/ American Aquarium-Brewster St.Z-95 And Dj Chris w/ Latin Night -Revolution

JB and The Moonshine Band-Brewster St.Neal Edwards & Reckless Abandon -Exec. Surf ClubOn Blast Standup Showdown Comedy 9pm

$5-House of RockZ-95 And Dj Chris w/ Latin Night -Revolution

Deadstring Brothers 8 Pm $6-House of RockWade Bowen w/ Troubadour TX-Brewster St.Z-95 And Dj Chris w/ Latin Night -Revolution

Casey Donahew Band w/ Matt Stell-Brewster St.Flat Broke -Exec. Surf ClubThe Cult-Concrete St.Z-95 And Dj Chris w/ Latin Night -Revolution

Z-95 And Dj Chris w/ Latin Night –Revolution“Apocolyptic Takeover Tour” Sammus Theory, Cage9 -Zeros

Alex “Kool Aid” Ansel 9pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationArtwalk Music By D&S-House of RockCorpus Christi Icerays Vs Texas Tornado -Amer. Bank Cntr.Cruise Control -Exec. Surf ClubFresh Fridays w/ Dj Mike Mo -RevolutionThe Spazmatics-Brewster St.DJ ET - Flanagan’s

Buster Jiggs With Neal Edwards 9pm $6-House of Rock Icerays Vs Wichita Falls Wildcats -Amer. Bank Cntr.Fresh Fridays w/ Dj Mike Mo -RevolutionGarage Band Classic-Brewster St.Jekyll and Hyde-Harbor PlayhouseQueensryche, Dokken, Accept, The Michael Schenker Group-Concrete St.Realms Con -Amer. Bank Cntr.Sam Demaris 9pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationTrysum -Exec. Surf ClubMariachis Del Inferno, Klax, Sick Pshco Devilz, Spanish Reds -Zeros DJ ET - Flanagan’s

Fresh Fridays w/ Dj Mike Mo -Revolution Jekyll and Hyde-Harbor PlayhouseLyrical Bynge -Exec. Surf ClubShane Mauss 9pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationUnwritten Law, Reely Rotnz, The Johnny 5 7 Pm $14 Adv/ $16 Dos-House of RockStatic-X, Ill Nino, Shogun, 9 Electric, Killamora, Texas Hate Machine -ZerosLate Show-This Dying Dream, Awaiting Oblivion-Zeros DJ ET - Flanagan’s

After Dark Revue Burlesque-House of RockFresh Fridays w/ Dj Mike Mo -RevolutionLisa Landry 9pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationThe Groove -Exec. Surf ClubDesign The Skyline, Memories In Broken Glass-ZerosDJ ET - Flanagan’s

Alex Reymundo 9pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationFresh Fridays w/ Dj Mike Mo -RevolutionJekyll and Hyde-Harbor PlayhouseDJ ET - Flanagan’s

Alex “Kool Aid” Ansel 8 & 10pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationCasting Call- Scandalous- Stage Play -Amer. Bank Cntr.Elise –RevolutionLatin Talk -Exec. Surf ClubTexas Heat Wave Car Show -Amer. Bank Cntr.The Heroin, Surlee 8:30 Pm $6/ $8 Minors-House of RockCarry The Storm, An Eaters Curse, Bleed By Example, D.F.W.T., Revisions-Zeros

Adams B-DAY Bash! Poison Lemon-Aid-Zeros Ben Tapia -Exec. Surf Club Icerays Vs Wichita Falls Wildcats -Amer. Bank Cntr.Jekyll and Hyde-Harbor PlayhouseLate Show W/ Hudson Falcons Midnight-House of RockPublic Zoo Battle -RevolutionRealms Con -Amer. Bank Cntr.Sam Demaris 8 & 10pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationSecond Saturday Sing-Along Piano Show-Brewster St.The Toasters, Eskapetones, Avenue Rockers, Soviet Spies 8 Pm $12 Adv/ $13 Dos-House of RockZombie Walk Kick-Off 5:30 Costume Contest 6:30 Start Zombie Walk-House of Rock

Icerays Vs Amarillo Bulls -Amer. Bank Cntr.Dillofest-House of RockJekyll and Hyde-Harbor PlayhouseMetal Shop-Brewster St.Scarecrow People -Exec. Surf ClubShane Mauss 8 & 10pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationThe Extravaganza -RevolutionJokes On You-Zeros

Texas Death Metal Beats & BAR.B.Q. 12 BANDS! -ZerosDearly Departed -RevolutionJon Cortez Band -Exec. Surf ClubLisa Landry 8 & 10pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationZombie Prom-House of Rock

Alex Reymundo 8 & 10pm-Comics Live @ Railroad Seafood StationJekyll and Hyde-Harbor PlayhouseBlack Thorn Hollow, P.B.A., The Ruined Few, Defiled Creation, Day Before Tomorrow-Zeros


CC Zombie Walk Oct. 13th - Downtown

by Kat McCloudMany would say that the concept of a “Zombie”,

(the restless undead that walks the earth craving brains), was best defined and constructed by cinema genius George A. Romero, in his 1968 film Night of the Living Dead, and carried on by future enthusiasts like Sam Raimi. Others argue that the Zombie-pocalypse began as early as 1932, with Victor Halperin’s White Zombie, featuring the infamous Bela Lugosi. Regardless of how long ago they invaded our imaginations, Zombie’s have clearly been “peaking” in pop culture this past decade. From Thriller flash mobs, to Zombie-themed pub crawls, all the way back to cinema (Thank’s ZombieLand!), and ending with the cult television phenomenon that is Walking Dead, even grandma wants to dress up in fake blood and grope at strangers demanding their fleshy, brainy delights! Well, here is your chance!

At 5pm on October 13th, you will have a once in a deathtime opportunity to take part in Corpus Christi’s first ever “Zombie Walk”, a tradition already carried on throughout the U.S., that will soon become a coastal staple for our future!

“But I feel silly dressing up like a Zombie for fun. My friends and coworkers will call me immature or crazy, and I wouldn’t want to have to deal with coming up with a valid reason to support my childish antics!,” you say?!?!

Well, what if we told you that it was all for a good cause??? No....A GREAT CAUSE!! Upon entering their website (the undead are online btw), CCzombiewalk.com let’s us know the low down right away. “The Corpus Christ Zombie Walk is a Non-Profit organization with a undead heart for local charities involving abused/neglected children and animals. All proceeds will be donated to the charities we have selected.” This year, those charities include Coastal Bend CASA, and the Gulf Coast Humane Society, with tickets starting at 15 dollars (17 for internet pre sale), which lands each Participant a Free T-shirt & Koozie after the walk, to commemorate the event. Each participant will also receive a bag of goodies donated by various sponsors, with a retail value of over $100!

The walk is all ages, beginning at the House of Rock on 511 Starr Street, and ending at the Fright Night Haunted house around 8pm . While everyone is encouraged to dress up in their Zombie gear, keep in mind that for $25 you can enter the Zombie Walk Costume Contest, and win some mega big prizes! You can purchase tickets online, or at TexasToyz, with the first fifty purchasers receiving free entry into the Fright Night Haunted House on the evening of the walk!So while it doesn’t really matter whether your a fan of old zombies, new zombies, or that badass TV show everyone’s raving about, one thing is for sure: Zombie’s are ALIVE and IN CORPUS! So get down there folks, and get some BRAAAAAIIIINNNSSSSS!!!! V


Zeros Hard Rock Club in Corpus knew exactly what they were doing, when they booked the gravity-defying style and metal magnates Static X, for the October 19th Noise Revolution Tour creeping up around the corner. Spawning forth into the Metal world the year Kurt Cobain died, [Note: that is how this author remembers 1994, thus creating a self inflicted standard for anything that happened that year, to be reflected in said tragedy’s mist, as well as a timeline for pop culture happenings post-Nirvana era] probably the most encapsulating thing to pull the industry out of the pits, were Alice Cooper inspired performers mixed with metal and shoe-gaze. Theatrics overshadowed everything else, and bands like Korn, Rob Zombie, Mushroomhead, and Coal Chamber began to take root. Among them, was Static-X, whose Mad Max-esque stage show, was known for lead singer Wayne Static’s stern and powerful growl, as well as his iconic hair. Although he will be joining no original member, Wayne Static is really the only reason we ever listened to begin with. The electronica devil metal is fun and all, but as Antone Newcombe is to the Brian Jonestown Massacre, Wayne Static is to Static-X, and oh thank thee that he shall grace us with his raspy presence! For more info on the show, visit Zeroe’s facebook page athttp://www.facebook.com/zerosrockclub, and be sure to get your tickets soon, so that you too may reminisce in the glory of “Push It”. See you there!

You say you want a Noise Revolution Static-X Fri. Oct. 19th - Zerosby Kat McCloud

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Something for everyone Alive or Undead -House of Rock by Kat McCloud

Hey House of Rock, do you have any great shows coming up this month? Oh, how about just like....a staple from every genre on the planet, taking over the venue weekly, to satisfy your hyper manic tastes, my dear reader? Yes, it is always a delight to allow one’s eyes to gaze upon the stellar lineups placed out before thee by the booking bad boys at the H.O.R.

This month, is no exception, kicking off with 80’s ska pioneers The Toasters, performing on October 13th at 8pm. Known for jams “Weekend in L.A.”, “Let the Bastards Grind”, and a mean cover of “Secret Agent Man”, the Toasters have maintained dignity, respect, and general street cred amongst both punksters and rudeboys, for over three decades. For anyone who once drew checkers on your

Chucks or sported Buddy Holly hair, this is the show for you! If you aren’t sure whether or not you’re sold yet, ask yourself if you were ever a fan of Operation Ivy, Less Than Jake, or Reel Big Fish. If so, this might be the show for you. For the nineties, late-wave punk kid, one might consider visiting H.O.R. to check out Unwritten Law on October 19th.

It wouldn’t be October, or Halloweeny, in any venue, if there wasn’t some sort of Zombie-themed event going at least one night. With that said, House of Rock also invites you to partake in the “Zombie Prom” (which is exactly what is sounds like), on the 27th. Maybe you didn’t get to go to your real prom, or maybe you did and just imagined it with a lot more blood, either way, you’re covered.


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Wrapping up the month of madness is Texas bred metal gods, The Sword, on October 29th. Debuting the release of their fourth album, Apocryphon, the band revives solid power metal riffs that sound ripped out of the 80’s, and combines them with grindcore/speed metal that will melt your face off. The show starts at 7pm, and is expected to be an epic, much-needed release, as we get ready for Thanksgiving. Eagle Claw and Gypsy Hawk are set to open. Get your tickets now at Texashouseofrock.com.


…because Officer, you don’t have the right. Am I free to go? A Lesson On Modern Police by Kyle Hoelscher

“The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon

probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.”

-Fourth Amendment of the Constitution of the United State of AmericaOur founders thought these words

were so important that they should be listed in our constitution before the right to a jury, right to counsel, and the right to be free of cruel and unusual punishment. Unfortunately, our leaders today are not interested in these words. In fact, our rights under the Fourth Amendment have degraded to the point that when the government wants to search, the peoples’ rights are an afterthought. Citizens are the last line of defense that remains. The problem is that most people do not know how to protect those precious rights that our forefathers died for. Let me illustrate.

I was recently stopped in my car for speeding. The cop approaches and we go through the normal routine, but right before he hands me the ticket, he puts his face into my window. He then asks me, “Mind if I search your car?” My response, “Well, of course I mind.” “Why? Do you have something to hide?”

In this situation, there would really be no harm to abandon my rights. He would have looked through the backseat or wherever, found empty candy wrappers, a Whataburger bag from a few weeks ago, and an air pump. So, let’s change up a few facts. What if I had left an empty beer can in my backseat by mistake? What if a friend had recently been a passenger in my car and left behind a legally prescribed pill bottle? What if I had recently gone hunting and still had a revolver in the glove box? You see how quickly this officer’s trick has now granted him the right to arrest me, put me in jail, impound my car, and label me a criminal. I want to tell that cop about the Fourth Amendment. I want to tell him that our founders died so that I could say no to his questions. I want to tell him how offended I am that he automatically assumes that I am a criminal. These are things I want to say, but

being a defense lawyer by trade, I know that no amount of explaining of human and civil rights would faze him. So, I responded how we should all respond to that question: “Because you don’t have the right. Am I free to go?” With that, he handed me the ticket and walked off. He didn’t do any follow up questions or investigation, because with those simple words, I let him know that I know my rights and I won’t be tricked. I deal with people who are on the wrong side of this scenario every day in my office. I’m often amazed when people abandon their rights, but I shouldn’t be. Police are very good at intimidating regular people into giving up constitutional rights. Most police even see this as a good thing. The more searches, the more illegal activities will be discovered and more criminals arrested. If deception and intimidation are required to get more searches, then so be it. So, this leaves you, an average citizen, as the last protector of your God given constitutional rights. To make it harder, the government, federal or state, has little interest in upholding these rights. Typically, they are the ones who take cases to the Supreme Court in an effort to remove your rights. These rights are not meaningfully taught to young people at school, church, or at home. Most people who give up their rights, don’t even realize they are doing so. Well, this article was written so that there can be some defense and education regarding our tattered Fourth Amendment. First lesson, if you consent, the Fourth Amendment no longer protects you. This consent is valid even if gained through deception. This is why a cop will often tell you that they already have the right to search, so you might as well agree to it. This is why they will say you will not be arrested if you


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consent, or that things will go easier on you. When deception doesn’t work, intimidation tactics also create valid consent. This is why a cop will threaten to bring K9 units to look for drugs, if you don’t consent. He will pull you out of your car or he will call two other cars as back up. The fact is that in the real world, if a cop is asking for your permission, it’s because he doesn’t have the right to do it. You will always know that they have the right to look through your stuff, because they will already be looking through your stuff. As I said before, they are very good at getting this consent. You must be the strong one. Stand your ground. Refusing a search is not reason for a search. Police know this. If they get a hint that you know your rights, they are more likely to move on. Just remember the title of this article. Say to the officer “You don’t have the right to search, am I free to go?” Lesson two, keep your mouth shut. The more you talk in any police encounter, the more reasons you give them to search or arrest you. The police do not stop you to chit chat, they stopped you because they think you are a criminal. Every question they ask is designed to build up a case for a search or arrest. If they

begin asking more questions than are required for the stop, respond with, “I don’t feel comfortable answering these questions, am I free to go, officer?” Be ready, the next question will insinuate that you have something to hide and that you should be searched, remember lesson one.

And finally lesson three, do not invite a police officer into your home. This goes along with the consent issue. If you let them in, anything they see will be reason to search and arrest you. If an officer comes to your home, there is a simple way to protect your privacy and constitutional rights. Talk to them on the porch and close the door behind you. Simple as that. The officer will always ask, “May I come in?” The answer to that is “no.” No need to be rude, but he is not a guest. He is a stranger who came to your home, unannounced, with unknown motives. That is someone you talk to on the porch. Don’t forget lessons one and two, they will come up. On that note, I will also let you know that you have the absolute right to not even answer the door. Once again, if they have the right, they will break your door down, then come in with pepper spray, guns, and stun grenades. But generally, being so rude

is unnecessary and typically an officer is there for a valid purpose (noise complaint, looking for witnesses, or even trying to find the home of a delinquent child). By keeping him out of your house, you protect your right to be free of government intrusion into the most sacred of places in your life. If you follow those three basic lessons, nearly all police encounters will go smoothly and your rights will not be trampled upon. Remember, police look for the lowest hanging fruit. This is usually someone who is poor or uneducated. When they know that you know your rights, they are very likely to move on to an easier target. Always remember that you are no longer dealing with the friendly police from the 50’s and 60’s. The police are not your friends; they are tools for the government to ferret out crime. To them, it’s a zero sum game. Any tool at their disposal is justified if they get their arrest. They will not lose any sleep if they trample your rights, but you might lose lots of sleep on the metal cots in the Nueces County Jail.

For more information on this see: flexyourrights.org.


Happy Birthday, Libra!!! This is your special month, and the sun will rise and set on you. This means that goals and desires will come to fruition in the next three weeks, beginning with a huge event on October 6. On this day challenging Saturn leaves your sign after a trying three years. You may have experienced a cluster of little upsets (issues at work, squabbles with your mate, issues with your home) and even some major bummers these past three years. On the bright side, juggernaut Saturn also encourages personal growth. So whatever problems you have been dealing with most likely led to some major changes for the better. This month you will really see how you have abandoned any dependent behavior of the past and learned how to solve your dilemmas on your own. Yay you!!

Scorpio Cosmic disciplinarian Saturn moves into Scorpio on the 6th of this month, and it’s going to be a humdinger of a transit. He will stick around for three whole years, ushering in great challenges and upheavals. “So what else is new?” you may wonder. Indeed, these past months (beginning late fall of last year) have been a really pain in the ass: relationship troubles, money probs, career kersplats. And it may seem as if stodgy Saturn may cause even more shit to hit the fan. Well, not exactly. Saturn is no softie, but he does cause serious self-examination and self-discipline. More changes are definitely on the way-new jobs, new lovers, new babies (stock up on condoms if this is not something you can handle right now-no joke). But you will be ready for the

changes. In fact, you may set off on a new life path you didn’t think you could manage. Guess what? With Saturn’s influence, you can. It will be spectacular!

Sagittarius It’s a severe case of hurry up and wait this month for Sag. The Sun is in Libra, which is your house of socializing and networking, so you will have a lot of mental energy buzzing around for an outlet. However, introspective Saturn will move into Scorpio, triggering a lie-back-and-contemplate-the-meaning-of-life attitude. What to do? Both!! A prime opportunity to cultivate a business relationship comes up mid-month, so if you are invited to a political or business event, go! However, recent changes at home will cause you to feel emotionally and physically exhausted. Save you energy for that one event, and take it easy the rest of the month.

Capricorn Saturn’s transit affects everyone this month, and for Cappy (who is governed by Saturn) the ringed planet’s forces are especially pronounced. In the first few days of October he takes residence in your house of work and ambition. The last time he was there was in 1980, so it may be a case of deja vu all over again. That is, any huge upsets in your education or career may be occurring again. By the same token great forward strides that were felt back then (if you were around-if you weren’t this applies to your former self) will be felt again. Now mistakes and tribulations do not need to be repeated. Think back to that time and learn from it, silly goose.

Don’t make the same mistakes you’ve been making (in your career, family, and love relationships) all these years. Buck up-and grow up, you old goat.

Aquarius Ah, Aquarius! Those stars in your eyes are what attract so many friends and lovers to you. But they have not been shining as of late, have they? You’ve learned some hard lessons these past six months-seemingly good friends may have deserted you, lovers may have fled with nary a word of explanation. Your financial situation has held steady but there may have been some personal issues to deal with at work. In all it’s been a trying period. But beginning this month things will settle down. Saturn departs Libra, which is your house of travel and flight (often, flight from sticky situations). You may have taken a trip in the last few months that offered a short respite from the chaos. You may still have a bit of wanderlust in you until the end of the year. If you have the means and the time, go ahead. You could use some more down time to sort out all the crap you’ve been through.

Pisces These past few months have felt like a sprint, have they not, mon petit poisson? You have been going through a period of letting go of your control issues and relying more on loved ones. There may have been some issues or illness in the family and you have had to shoulder some burden, but those around you have been sharing it with you. At this point things are clearing up, and you may have a closer bond with your mate and/or family as a result.

The most important lesson you can take away is not to keep problems to yourself and stop trying to be the hero. You are surrounded by people who love you; they are willing and very able to help.

Aries The Sun will transit your sectors of partnerships and intimacy this month. For the first half of October you will be itching to make it official. Your current squeeze may suddenly seem like “the one”, or you could develop a solid business plan with a buddy. The warm nature of the Sun may cause you to idealize these potential partnerships, so take care that you do your homework (and consult your therapist) before signing on the dotted line. When the Sun moves into Scorpio toward the end of the month you will be feeling super frisky and may even get the urge to reproduce. Again, enjoy it while it lasts, but consider all the possible consequences. On the 29th a full moon in Taurus will bring some good news about a job or project.

Taurus The Sun moving into your house of order and organization prompts you to do some major cleanup work, both literally and on the psychic level. This is a capping off of the three-year transit Saturn made through Libra, which influences your house of health and all things tidy. You may have made some definite strides in kicking bad habits (smoking, yoyo dieting, Xanax with an absinthe chaser), and as a result you feel healthier than you ever have. Now you turn your attention to clutter in your home and in your heart. Do the spring cleaning you

So... what’s your sign?? October 2012 by Adrienne West and Sukie Rogue


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neglected in April, and visit with a life coach or therapist to clear out that nagging baggage that is affecting your personal relationships in subtle and not-so-subtle ways.

Gemini The Sun moves through your house of fun and socializing, so there will be plenty to do and plenty of people to do it with this month. Not that you are ever in a shell, Gems, but you will feel especially bold and vocal for the next several weeks. New friends will pop up, and maybe a fun flirtation or two. Serious relationships aren’t highlighted this month, so have fun but keep it light and easy. As Sun moves into Scorpio at the end of the month your focus turns to health and fitness. Already fit you will now look inward and work to get your psyche in the best possible shape. Meditation, yoga, and a more holistic diet will help in this new spiritual cleansing you are seeking.

Cancer Cancer is a water sign but natives are still quite earthy and rooted to home. The first three weeks of this month highlight this aspect, as the Sun moves through your sector of roots and home life. You will be inclined to focus your attention on home and hearth: cooking, crafting, entertaining, and treating your loved ones to much nurturing. You are quite the social butterfly, but the first three weeks of October, as the air turns crisp (or slightly less sweltering), don’t worry about begging off invitations to go out. Staying in is just right for you right now. As Sun moves into Scorpio at the end of the month you will feel a surge of creativity and a newly-ignited spark for a project you may

have set aside this past year. The r & r you experienced at the start of the month will ensure you are more than ready to tackle this now.

Leo Many opportunities for networking and general socializing abound this month, Leo. The Sun in you friendship and partnerships sector ensures that you will make several important contacts in the first three weeks of the month. In fact, one or two important projects that you shelved in the last year will now be brought to the forefront. This doesn’t mean, however, that you should forget those who have championed your cause from the beginning. A Jupiter retrograde through your house of friendships tells you to tap your faithful friends for help and ideas as well. Finally, in the final week of October the Sun shines on your house of domesticity. Take a break, plan some quality time at home, and invite your old and new friends over for a fall feast.

Virgo The first three weeks of the month may feel like a long walk uphill. You must tackle some issues at work (or school) and put your nose to the grindstone. Fortunately the Sun will be warming your sector of hard work and career so you will have his help to tidy up some things in the office or devote more time to your studies. Have you been tossing about an idea about a project close to your heart? The last week of October is the best time to put the plan into action. This is when the Sun moves into Scorpio, your house of communication and big ideas. Enlist a pal to work out the details and look forward to a successful end of the year.

the vent magazine oct 2012 issue

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