the thick of it - 3x04

8/10/2019 The Thick of It - 3x04

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100:00:00,100-->00:00:02,195No,we'vegotthemallcomingovertoday.200:00:02,280-->00:00:04,430Yeah,thedishyopposition.300:00:04,520-->00:00:05,589Doyouknow,Robyn,400:00:05,680-->00:00:08,114shecallsPeterMannionPeterMan-Yum.500:00:08,200-->00:00:12,273Nowadays,Ithinktwatandpratareprettyinterchangeable,really.600:00:12,360-->00:00:16,672

Anyway,semanticsaside,sheshouldn'tbesayinganythinglikethattoyou700:00:16,760-->00:00:19,035andItakeyourpoint,Mum,andIwillhaveaword.800:00:19,120-->00:00:21,873Theoppositionhavetoletusseniorcivilservants,

900:00:21,960-->00:00:25,316Imean,peoplelikeme,knowexactlywhatthey'rehopingtoachieve,1000:00:25,400-->00:00:29,313sothatwhenthey'rehandedthereinsofpower...1100:00:29,400-->00:00:31,391Um...Well,Ithink

theyaregoingtobe.1200:00:31,480-->00:00:34,278Imean,thislotarelookingquitetoasted.1300:00:34,360-->00:00:39,832Right,Ellahasthrownamassive


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forimplementationdayhere2700:01:09,320-->00:01:12,710andyou'rejustcuttingoutmoreweirdjapanesecartoons,orwhateveritis.2800:01:12,800-->00:01:13,789It'sforthematrix.2900:01:13,880-->00:01:16,633WhenweinfiltrateDoSAC,Iwanttoprioritisetargets,okay?3000:01:16,720-->00:01:19,792Hey,look.That'sTerriCoverley,DoSACHeadofPressCivilService.3100:01:19,880-->00:01:21,711Andwhoexactlyisthat?

3200:01:21,800-->00:01:22,869Well,it'sUhura,butyouknow,3300:01:22,960-->00:01:25,315she'sheadofcommsontheEnterprise,soitkindofmakessense.3400:01:25,400-->00:01:27,709Oh!Hey,doyouknowwhat,Iwonder

ifwe'llgettosneakuponOlly3500:01:27,800-->00:01:28,994andcatchhimnotworking?3600:01:29,080-->00:01:31,196Betterstill,I'dliketoseehimgettingbollockedbyMalcolm.3700:01:31,280-->00:01:32,315

(EMMALAUGHS)3800:01:32,400-->00:01:35,676"I'mgoingtoripoutyourbladderandwearitasabandana."3900:01:35,760-->00:01:36,749EMMA:Okay,um...


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PHIL:Ineedtoknow4000:01:36,840-->00:01:38,159whatGlennCullenlookslike?4100:01:38,240-->00:01:41,789Oh,GlennCullen,uh...50s,kindofdepressedlooking.4200:01:41,880-->00:01:43,472Ialwaysthinkofhimlikeabloodhound.4300:01:43,560-->00:01:45,312Okay,I'llgetapictureofMickHucknall.4400:01:45,400-->00:01:48,278Morning,comrades!Howgoestherevolution?

4500:01:48,360-->00:01:49,759PHIL:Morning.EMMA:Morning,Peter.4600:01:49,840-->00:01:53,833Ourtanksontheirlawnatlast,fuck-a-doodle-doo.4700:01:53,920-->00:01:55,114

Talkingofwhich,mayIpresent4800:01:55,200-->00:01:58,192-theDoSACimplementationmatrix.-EMMA:Don'task.4900:01:58,280-->00:02:01,078Look,thisisaverystraightforwardsetofmeetings50

00:02:01,160-->00:02:02,878withtheseniorcivilservants.5100:02:02,960-->00:02:04,518"Where'sthestopcock?"5200:02:04,600-->00:02:06,431"WherecanIget


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adecentcupofcoffee?"5300:02:06,520-->00:02:09,557"Here'sourlegislativeagendaforthenextthreeyears."5400:02:09,640-->00:02:11,153Yeah,Iknow.ButStewart'sverykeenforustouse5500:02:11,240-->00:02:13,310avisitDoSACasascoutingexercise.5600:02:13,400-->00:02:15,630Well,I'mverykeentouseStewart'smouthasanashtray5700:02:15,720-->00:02:17,039butthatdoesn'tmeanIdoit.

5800:02:17,120-->00:02:19,554Socialmobility,whatdoesthatactuallymean?5900:02:19,640-->00:02:22,234Well,it'sjusta...It'sjustapersonalobservation,6000:02:22,320-->00:02:24,515

buteverytimeIhearthewords"socialmobility",6100:02:24,600-->00:02:27,831Ikeepthinkingaboutoneofthoseshoppingtrolleys6200:02:27,920-->00:02:29,797thatgodownthepavement,theelectricthingsthat...

6300:02:29,880-->00:02:31,711NICOLA:Whatdoesitmeantonormalpeople?6400:02:31,800-->00:02:32,835Itmeans,really,uh...65


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00:02:32,920-->00:02:33,909(MOBILERINGING)6600:02:34,000-->00:02:37,879...liftingpeopleoutofaworldofdisadvantage6700:02:37,960-->00:02:40,428andintoaworldofopportunity.6800:02:40,520-->00:02:44,069Sorry,justonesec,I'vejustgottoswitchthattovoicemail.6900:02:44,160-->00:02:47,232Okay,fourthsector.Meananything?7000:02:49,280-->00:02:52,113Nothing.Great!

Becausewe'reabouttocreateit.7100:02:52,200-->00:02:54,589-(MOBILERINGING)-Thefourthsectoris...7200:02:54,680-->00:02:56,796It'sbasicallyrealpeople,ordinarypeople...73

00:02:56,880-->00:02:59,235justgivemeonesecond.Hello?Yes,it'sNicolaMurray.7400:02:59,320-->00:03:01,231What'sgoingonattheschool,anyway?7500:03:01,320-->00:03:05,632Thingsarealittlebitshittyathome,thedaughter'sgoneallRagingBull.

7600:03:05,720-->00:03:08,234Sheputonalotofweight?7700:03:08,320-->00:03:11,039No.No,Imeanshe'skickingoffatschool.78


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00:03:11,120-->00:03:15,033Basically,eversinceMalcolmmadeNicolaputherinthefuckingcomp,7900:03:15,120-->00:03:17,554she'sheadingforwhatMrNeilDiamondIbelievewouldhavecalled8000:03:17,640-->00:03:20,234a"SweetColumbine"incident.8100:03:20,320-->00:03:23,039MALCOLM:Oh,Idon'tgivetwoshitsofalamb'stail.8200:03:23,120-->00:03:25,873Eileenwilljusthavetopostponeherfuckingthroatsurgery.83

00:03:25,960-->00:03:28,679Iwanthersteam-cleanedandonTheDailyPolitics,8400:03:28,760-->00:03:32,912smilingandnoddingatAndrewNeil'ssneery,fuckinghaemorrhoidface8500:03:33,000-->00:03:34,797andtellinghimtolayoffthefuckingfishsuppers

8600:03:34,880-->00:03:36,598andthepoppers,right.Doit.8700:03:36,680-->00:03:40,468Okay,ahoythere,DoSAC.Where'sDameEllenMacArseache?8800:03:40,560-->00:03:42,118Uh,she'sonacall.

8900:03:42,200-->00:03:44,111Allright,okay.Wakey,wakey,wakey.9000:03:44,200-->00:03:45,997-Yes,yes.-Oppositiondrill,yeah?Comeon.


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9100:03:46,080-->00:03:48,958Yes.TellJameshewillgouptotheschool9200:03:49,040-->00:03:50,553andifhedoesn't,thenhewillfindhimself...9300:03:50,640-->00:03:52,676-Hurryup!...sleepinginthespareroom9400:03:52,760-->00:03:54,876ofhisfuckingsister'shouse.9500:03:55,000-->00:03:56,433Lovely.Thankyou.96

00:03:56,520-->00:03:58,590-Yeah,oppositiondrill,right?-Yeah.9700:03:58,680-->00:04:00,750Whentheoppositionarehere,youtellthemnothing9800:04:00,840-->00:04:03,957exceptwherethetoiletsare,butyoulieaboutthat,right?

9900:04:04,040-->00:04:05,189AndTerri,keepyourtitsin.10000:04:05,280-->00:04:06,269(OLLYLAUGHING)10100:04:06,360-->00:04:07,873Yeah,youarelookingveryairhostesstoday,

10200:04:07,960-->00:04:08,995isthatallforMannion?10300:04:09,080-->00:04:11,469AllIsaidwasthatIthinkhe'saverycharmingman.


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10400:04:11,640-->00:04:13,631ShouldwebeformallydressedforDoSAC?10500:04:13,760-->00:04:17,150Itdoesfeelabitlikepayingourrespectstosomemad,dyingaunt.10600:04:17,240-->00:04:20,437No,youlookfine.It'sallprettyshambolicthereatthemoment.10700:04:20,520-->00:04:24,513NicolaMurray'squitedistractedwiththatwholedaughterthing.10800:04:24,600-->00:04:26,033Oh,what'sthat?109

00:04:26,120-->00:04:27,712-Reallyinteresting...Butprivate.-No.11000:04:27,800-->00:04:28,789(MOBILERINGS)11100:04:28,880-->00:04:30,916That'sStewart.I'mjustgonnahavetoshowhimup.

11200:04:31,000-->00:04:32,513Great,MrBlueSky.11300:04:32,600-->00:04:34,830We'renotgoingtopractisefistbumpsagain,arewe?11400:04:34,920-->00:04:37,593Phil,ifyoumentionanythingoutofturnwhileI'mgone,

11500:04:37,680-->00:04:41,116IwillsendyourMumthatpictureofyoudressedupasCher,okay?11600:04:41,200-->00:04:42,553Onebutton.


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11700:04:43,720-->00:04:45,438-Cher?-CelineDion,karaokenight.11800:04:45,520-->00:04:47,476Itwastotallyharmless.11900:04:48,320-->00:04:50,436Okay,OllytoldEmmathatthere'sashitstorm12000:04:50,520-->00:04:51,999brewingabouttheminister'sdaughter.12100:04:52,080-->00:04:54,833Shewasonlytheminister'sdaughter,butsheknewhowtotakethecollection.122

00:04:54,920-->00:04:56,194She's12.12300:04:56,720-->00:04:59,917Oh...Shit.Strikethatlastremark,12400:05:00,000-->00:05:03,197it'sactuallyalittlepoemthatgetsmuchworse.125

00:05:03,280-->00:05:04,599Okay,welllet'sjustputaphotoofherup,12600:05:04,680-->00:05:06,033justsoweknowwhatwe'resteeringclearof.12700:05:06,120-->00:05:07,951You'vegotherphotograph?No,Phil!

12800:05:08,040-->00:05:09,473Okay,NicolaMurray'sdaughter,12900:05:09,560-->00:05:11,630actuallythat'snotNicolaMurray'sdaughter,that'sTracyBeaker,right,130


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00:05:11,720-->00:05:12,948shewasdownhere13100:05:13,040-->00:05:14,678ontheintakelistforanindependentgirls'school13200:05:14,760-->00:05:16,955butnowshe'sgoinghere,localcomprehensive.13300:05:17,040-->00:05:19,998AplaygroundfulloffirsttrimesterpregnanciesandCroydonfacelifts.13400:05:20,080-->00:05:23,197Sowhatareyousaying?It'swrongtosendyourchildtoacomprehensive?135

00:05:23,280-->00:05:25,589Yeah,wrong.Oratleastvery,verycareless.13600:05:26,000-->00:05:29,913So,oneoftheinitiativesthatwe'vegotisanationalregister13700:05:30,000-->00:05:32,992ofreallyextraordinaryordinarypeople,

13800:05:33,080-->00:05:36,356whowe'regoingtocallthefourthsectorpathfinders.13900:05:36,440-->00:05:40,353WhatIwanttotryandbringtomindisthatamazingJFKspeech,youknow...14000:05:40,440-->00:05:41,429(MOBILERINGS)

14100:05:41,520-->00:05:43,795-Hey,comeon,comeon.-Yeah,yeah.14200:05:43,880-->00:05:45,996Asknotwhatyourcountrycando,butwhatyou...


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14300:05:46,080-->00:05:49,914Whatyourcountrycandotohelpyoudotohelpyouhelpyourself.14400:05:50,000-->00:05:53,310(SOFTLY)Nicola,it'sMartinStone,yourdaughter'sheadmaster.14500:05:53,400-->00:05:54,753-Yes.-Jamescan'tcomeinto...14600:05:54,840-->00:05:57,673aboutthemeetingforyourdaughter's,um,problem...14700:05:57,760-->00:06:00,354Yes,okay,thankyou.

Forfuck'ssake,Terri!14800:06:00,440-->00:06:01,555MrStone,hi.14900:06:01,640-->00:06:05,030It'sthewholedeservingandundeservingpoorargumentagain,though,isn'tit?15000:06:05,120-->00:06:06,599

-It'sthechavsandchav-nots.-GLENN:Yeah.15100:06:06,680-->00:06:08,159Right.PinkyandfuckingPerky,15200:06:08,240-->00:06:11,391listen,thisfourthsectorthing,right?It'sfuckingmad.153

00:06:11,480-->00:06:14,631She'smad.She'slikeTomCruise'sfavouritefuckingbrush,right?15400:06:14,720-->00:06:16,472Butthegreatthingaboutitis,it'sfree.155


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00:06:16,560-->00:06:19,154Soyoutwo,Iwantyoutorubyourdickstogether15600:06:19,240-->00:06:21,595andgetsomefuckingenergygoinginhere.15700:06:21,680-->00:06:23,830Idon'tcarewhetheryouinjectyourselfwithstemcells15800:06:23,920-->00:06:25,638orputcocaineinyourfuckingFruitCorners,15900:06:25,720-->00:06:27,597justgetonwithsomething.160

00:06:27,680-->00:06:29,955CanIhaveaword?Myhusbandhasbailedonme,16100:06:30,040-->00:06:32,600soI'mgoingtohavetogettoElla'sschoolthisafternoon.16200:06:32,680-->00:06:34,910Look,Nicola,thetaxpayerisnotbankrollingyou

16300:06:35,000-->00:06:36,433todothissortofthing,youknow?16400:06:36,520-->00:06:38,238Imean,ifIwantedpersonalerrandsdone,16500:06:38,320-->00:06:40,595Icouldgetfuckingtheunbaked

gingerbreadmanthere16600:06:40,680-->00:06:42,989topopoutandgetmeafuckingcattlegun.16700:06:43,080-->00:06:44,399Seemeafterschool.


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16800:06:44,480-->00:06:47,040Okay,so...What?16900:06:47,120-->00:06:49,759Okay,justyou,then,so...17000:06:49,840-->00:06:52,638Canyouworkupthiswholefourthsectorthing?17100:06:52,720-->00:06:55,792Icanseeyouhatetheideasoyou'llbeabletofindthesnags,okay?17200:06:55,880-->00:06:57,359Stewart.173

00:06:57,440-->00:06:59,431Ah,Peter,I'mgladwecouldhookup.17400:06:59,520-->00:07:03,877Justwantedtotakeacoupleofturnswithyouontheideascarousel,yeah?17500:07:03,960-->00:07:07,032Thinkofwayswecanturnyourteamintoalittleclusterofexcellence.

17600:07:07,120-->00:07:08,758Oh,youmeanyouwantedtohaveachat...17700:07:08,840-->00:07:10,432Hey,what'sthis?17800:07:10,840-->00:07:13,400Oh,that'sjustPhil'sKlingonhoroscope.

17900:07:13,480-->00:07:14,959It'sanimplementationmatrix.18000:07:15,040-->00:07:17,315Yeah,well,clearly.Twoaxesdissectingthemidpoint


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18100:07:17,400-->00:07:20,039tocreatefourdiametricallyopposedquadrants.18200:07:20,120-->00:07:23,396Iliketheplasmicnatureofyourdatamodelling.Nice.18300:07:23,480-->00:07:27,075Achild'sphotograph.Whatisthatdoingupthere?18400:07:27,160-->00:07:28,559PHIL:There,happynow?18500:07:28,640-->00:07:30,596PETER:NowI'mconfused.Whoisthat?186

00:07:30,680-->00:07:32,113Noone,it'saCylonCenturion.18700:07:32,200-->00:07:35,795Phil,helpmeouthere.Look,whatarethesevectors,PoshandShit?18800:07:35,880-->00:07:39,793Theyrefertoschools.Yousee,Murray'sdaughterwasdowntogohere,

18900:07:39,880-->00:07:41,916someteeny,Sloanie,independentgirls'school,19000:07:42,000-->00:07:44,150butshe'sbeenmovedtohere,whichisacomprehensive,19100:07:44,240-->00:07:46,037banginthemiddle

ofapoorcatchmentarea.19200:07:46,120-->00:07:49,078First,sheoptsoutofthestateeducationsystem,19300:07:49,160-->00:07:51,594-whichisbad.


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-PHIL:Yeah.19400:07:51,680-->00:07:54,558Then,presumablyunderpressurefromthepartymachine,shesays,19500:07:54,640-->00:07:57,677"Actually,sodyourlifechances,Cylon,darling,19600:07:57,760-->00:08:01,036"Mummy'sgoingtosendyouheretosaveherpoliticalcareer."19700:08:01,120-->00:08:02,712Badissimo!19800:08:02,800-->00:08:05,917So,howarewegoingtodeploythis?

19900:08:06,000-->00:08:07,115We'renot.20000:08:07,200-->00:08:09,475Thepointofdepartureisthis.20100:08:09,560-->00:08:13,997"Knowledgeisporridge."

20200:08:14,080-->00:08:18,358Oh,Jesus,Stewart,thatdoesn'tevenfuckingrhyme.20300:08:18,440-->00:08:21,910Look,letmehaveago,allright?Look.20400:08:22,000-->00:08:25,231Supposewe'resayingthatNicolaMurrayshouldhavestucktoherguns

20500:08:25,320-->00:08:27,231andsentherdaughterhere:Posh.20600:08:27,320-->00:08:29,276Yousee,Stewart?Icandothisstuff.207


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00:08:29,360-->00:08:32,989Well,thenwelookelitist,outoftouchwithordinaryparents.20800:08:33,080-->00:08:39,189Ordowesay,"No,poshiswrongissimo."20900:08:39,280-->00:08:41,669Okay,look,look,look.Hmm?Hmm?Let'spause,yeah?21000:08:41,760-->00:08:45,673Let'sswitchofftheSatNav,pullover,electricsofttopbackon,21100:08:45,760-->00:08:46,875switchofftheengine.21200:08:46,960-->00:08:48,518

I'mnotgettinginthebackseatwithyou,Stewart,21300:08:48,600-->00:08:50,750ifthiswherethissinistermindgameisgoing.21400:08:50,840-->00:08:52,956Let'simagineeranarrative.215

00:08:53,040-->00:08:55,713-Oh,goody.-So,let'simagineerthenarrative21600:08:55,800-->00:08:59,759thatPeterheremayknowsomethingaboutthisbutherefusestotellyou.21700:08:59,840-->00:09:01,831"It'sbeneathhisdignity",say.

21800:09:01,920-->00:09:06,072Ihatetobeaspoil-sport,butcanwebrieflyrefocusonourvisittoDoSAC?21900:09:06,160-->00:09:08,037-STEWART:Yeah.Whoareyoumeeting?-Gotacoupleofmeetings


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22000:09:08,120-->00:09:10,759withtwotoppeople,youknow,thebig,swingingdicks.22100:09:10,840-->00:09:13,513Yeah,okay,well,don'tforgetthetiny,staticdicks.22200:09:13,600-->00:09:15,238Yeah,we'renotallowedtotalktoherboyfriend,though.22300:09:15,320-->00:09:19,313Veryfunny.WhataboutTerriCoverley?Ollysaysshe'suttershit.22400:09:19,400-->00:09:20,628Let'smakeanappointmentforPeterhere

22500:09:20,720-->00:09:22,950totakeheroutforaniceskinnylatte,yeah?22600:09:23,040-->00:09:25,235-Seeifshespillsthecoffeebeans.-Great.22700:09:25,720-->00:09:26,760-Thankyou.

-Hello,MrsMurray,22800:09:26,760-->00:09:27,988-thanksforcomingin.-MrStone,thankyousomuch.22900:09:28,080-->00:09:29,115Thankyou,Christina.23000:09:29,200-->00:09:30,872

Sorry,isyourhusbandnotwithyou?23100:09:30,960-->00:09:32,837-No,I'msorry.-Okay,wellthat'sdisappointing,23200:09:32,920-->00:09:35,878'causeIreallywashopingtospeak


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tobothofyouaboutthis.23300:09:35,960-->00:09:37,837Yeah,Ididactuallywanttocomeandseeyouanyway23400:09:37,920-->00:09:39,478-onaseparateissue.-Oh!Allright.23500:09:39,560-->00:09:41,073Iwonderedifyou'dbeinterestedinbecoming23600:09:41,160-->00:09:43,594oneofourfirstfourthsectorpathfinders?23700:09:43,680-->00:09:46,513

Right.Well,Idon'tknowwhatthatactuallymeans,but...23800:09:46,600-->00:09:49,114(LAUGHING)Idolookfantasticinasafarisuit.23900:09:49,200-->00:09:51,509Oh,right.I'msureyoudo.240

00:09:51,600-->00:09:53,955-Let'sjustputthattooneside.-Yes,obviously.24100:09:54,040-->00:09:57,271Asweknow,Ella's,well,let'ssay"challengingbehaviour"24200:09:57,360-->00:09:58,713hasreachedacriticalpoint.

24300:09:58,800-->00:10:01,109Therewasaninstantyesterday.24400:10:01,240-->00:10:06,155EllaandsomeaccomplicesattackedanotherYear7girl245


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00:10:06,240-->00:10:07,878withapairofhairstraighteners.24600:10:07,960-->00:10:10,599Pinnedherdown,thisgirlwhohasquitecurlyhair,24700:10:10,680-->00:10:13,114andEllasetaboutironingit.24800:10:13,200-->00:10:14,553Oh,myGod.24900:10:15,640-->00:10:17,596Right.They'rehere.25000:10:19,000-->00:10:20,797Hasanyoneseenmyimplementationfile?

25100:10:20,880-->00:10:22,108Isthatitoverthere?25200:10:22,200-->00:10:23,633Yeah,thanks,Glenn.25300:10:23,720-->00:10:25,153(SIGHS)Isthisyou,Glenn?254

00:10:25,240-->00:10:27,834GLENN:No,it'sOlly,youknowwhathe'slike.25500:10:27,920-->00:10:30,992(SIGHS)Well,it'spuerile.I'vehadtocallbloodyIT.25600:10:31,080-->00:10:33,230Olly'sputsomekindofawfulscreensaveron.

25700:10:33,320-->00:10:35,311Howdoyoudisableit?25800:10:35,520-->00:10:36,999It'snotfunny,Glenn.259


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00:10:37,080-->00:10:38,832Iknow.I'mnotlaughing.26000:10:38,920-->00:10:41,115HaveyoumetMrDarcyyet,then?26100:10:41,200-->00:10:43,156Hasheswunginthroughthewindow26200:10:43,240-->00:10:45,629inalittletophatandsmokingjacket?26300:10:45,720-->00:10:49,599Thisfeedbackisreally,reallysoencouraging.26400:10:49,680-->00:10:52,433Havingtroublewiththeoldfourthsectorring-around,areyou?

26500:10:52,520-->00:10:55,239No,notreally.Ijustringpeopleupandsay,"Doyouthinkthisisshite?"26600:10:55,320-->00:10:57,515Theysayyes,Iagree,that'sit.Jobdone.26700:10:57,600-->00:10:59,158

Whathaveyouactuallybeendoing,then?26800:10:59,240-->00:11:02,755I'veactuallybeenmakingsomePeterMannionfacemasks.26900:11:02,840-->00:11:04,512(LAUGHING)Excellent!27000:11:06,320-->00:11:10,711

(SEDUCTIVEVOICE)"Oh,Terri,mebeauty,Iliketheheftofyourjib.27100:11:10,800-->00:11:14,349"Oh,dear,I'mgoingallboogie-woogiedownstairs."27200:11:14,440-->00:11:16,192


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(MOBILERINGING)27300:11:17,360-->00:11:18,349(ASMANNION)Hello?27400:11:18,440-->00:11:20,635Hi,Olly,I'vegotabitofnewsforyou.27500:11:20,720-->00:11:23,439Right.You'repregnant,areyou?27600:11:23,520-->00:11:24,999No,I'mnotfuckingpregnant!27700:11:25,080-->00:11:27,036Sowhat'syour...Whatisyournews?278

00:11:27,120-->00:11:29,270It'stheNicolaMurraydaughterthing,27900:11:29,360-->00:11:32,875youknowtheswitchingfromprivatetostate?28000:11:32,960-->00:11:34,313Theyknowaboutithere.281

00:11:34,400-->00:11:36,516Thankyou,Emma!How?How?28200:11:36,600-->00:11:38,477-Phil.-Right,okay,well,youtellPhil,28300:11:38,560-->00:11:41,074I'mgoingtotakehisstupidfuckinglightsabercollection

28400:11:41,160-->00:11:43,879andshoveitslowlythroughhiseyesockets,right?28500:11:43,960-->00:11:47,157HowhasEllabeenbehavingathome?286


23/53

00:11:47,240-->00:11:49,276Let'ssay,overthelastweekorso.28700:11:49,360-->00:11:52,352Well,notfantasticallygood,apparently.28800:11:52,440-->00:11:53,475Sorry,"apparently"?28900:11:53,560-->00:11:55,312Becausethefourthsectorpathfinderinitiative29000:11:55,400-->00:11:58,358istakingupverymuchallofmytime.29100:11:58,440-->00:12:00,431Ihaven'tseenElla.

29200:12:00,520-->00:12:02,556Andyourhusband'sbeenaround?29300:12:03,000-->00:12:05,833(CHUCKLES)Meetmyhusband.He'sneverreallythere.29400:12:05,920-->00:12:07,751Letmeputmycardsonthetable.

29500:12:07,840-->00:12:11,230Thisincidentwiththehairstraightenerswassosevere,okay,29600:12:11,320-->00:12:12,719thatIhavenooption29700:12:12,800-->00:12:15,473buttoexcludeEllafromthisschool

withimmediateeffect.29800:12:15,560-->00:12:16,595(MOBILERINGING)29900:12:16,680-->00:12:17,908You'llbetakingherhomewithyou.


24/53

30000:12:18,000-->00:12:20,036No,well,Ican'tdothat,yousee,Ican'thaveherwithmetoday...30100:12:20,120-->00:12:22,475Oh,look,MrsMurray,pleaseanswerthatphone.30200:12:22,560-->00:12:24,949I'msosorry,Iwillbeback.30300:12:25,640-->00:12:27,835Olly,whatisit?Thishadbetterbeimportant.30400:12:27,920-->00:12:31,549Mannion'steamknowabouttheschoolswitch.

30500:12:31,640-->00:12:32,675(SIGHS)30600:12:32,760-->00:12:36,150Youshouldn'tworrybecausethere'snowaythepresswillrunwiththis,30700:12:36,240-->00:12:37,514it'sapersonalthing.

30800:12:37,600-->00:12:41,354Ella'sbeenbullyingotherkidsand,um,30900:12:41,440-->00:12:43,556they'rethreateningtoexcludeher.31000:12:43,640-->00:12:45,676-What?-GLENN:What'sgoingon?

31100:12:45,760-->00:12:47,990OLLY:Hey,atleastthey'renotgoingtoexpelher.31200:12:48,080-->00:12:49,559No,it'sthesamefuckingthing!


25/53

31300:12:49,640-->00:12:52,154That'swhattheysaytomakeitsoundbetter.31400:12:52,240-->00:12:54,276It'sstillthesameoldshit.31500:12:54,360-->00:12:56,078No.Oh,right.Oh,right.31600:12:56,160-->00:12:59,709(CRYING)Thisisjustsoawfuland...Oh,Olly,I'msuchacrapmom!31700:12:59,800-->00:13:01,552I'msuchacrapmum!31800:13:01,640-->00:13:02,789

No,no,you'renot...31900:13:02,880-->00:13:05,599No,you'rereallygood,you'reapathfindermum.32000:13:05,680-->00:13:06,715That'swhatyouare.32100:13:06,800-->00:13:08,119

Yeah,well,32200:13:08,200-->00:13:11,078Imademydaughtercometothisfuckingschool32300:13:11,160-->00:13:12,195awayfromallherfriends32400:13:12,280-->00:13:15,511

andshejustturnedintoatotalfuckingdroog!32500:13:15,600-->00:13:20,037Yeah,but...Youknow...32600:13:21,040-->00:13:25,113That'sit,isit?Thanks,Olly,


26/53

goodtoknowyou'rethereforme.32700:13:25,600-->00:13:27,318Whatisthiswheeliebinofmisery?32800:13:27,400-->00:13:30,710DoIgatherEllaisbullying?32900:13:30,800-->00:13:32,472Youhavetokeepthistoyourself.33000:13:32,560-->00:13:35,074It'sokay.Thepresscan'tuseit.33100:13:35,160-->00:13:37,594ThisissomethingthatyouandIjustkeepbetweenourselves.332

00:13:37,680-->00:13:38,715Okay.33300:13:38,800-->00:13:41,951-There'snoneedtotellTerri.-Okay.Good.Good.33400:13:42,040-->00:13:46,431Unbelievable!6.50bookingfee335

00:13:46,520-->00:13:49,557foreverysinglepersonI'mtakinginmypartyof10.33600:13:49,640-->00:13:51,949-Soundsserious,Terri.-AnynewsfromNicola?33700:13:52,040-->00:13:53,473-GLENN:No.-Nothing.

33800:13:54,080-->00:13:55,195We'rein.33900:13:55,280-->00:13:57,430Philip,you'renotinMissionImpossible.


27/53

34000:13:57,520-->00:14:00,592Someguyjustmadecontact.Uh,lookslikeanEwok,34100:14:00,680-->00:14:04,275smallpatchofwhitehaironlefttemple.34200:14:04,360-->00:14:07,909Ah,thatwouldbeRobertKing,civilservant,usedtoworkwithBERR.34300:14:08,000-->00:14:09,592Ollysayshe'sabitofadruid.34400:14:09,680-->00:14:11,989Who'sthatblokestaringatus?345

00:14:12,080-->00:14:14,719-That...That'sactuallyawoman.-Oh,Christ.34600:14:14,800-->00:14:18,156I'mnotlosingmytouch,Ijusthaven'tgotmydistanceglasseswithme.34700:14:18,240-->00:14:20,959(CHUCKLING)TheoldBangkokexoneration.

34800:14:21,040-->00:14:24,794Routeoneexcuseforaccidentallyhavingagoonatranssexual.34900:14:25,960-->00:14:27,518Christ,Phil,she'sactuallyabitcreepy.35000:14:27,600-->00:14:30,717Looksasifshe'sgonna

launchherselfatusatanysecond.35100:14:30,800-->00:14:33,075Emma,I'vegotawomanstaringatusfromabalcony,35200:14:33,160-->00:14:35,196sortofdarkhair,likeinabob?


28/53

35300:14:35,280-->00:14:37,953Shelookslikeshe'sinherownworldandshe'sgotlostthere?35400:14:38,040-->00:14:40,076Oh,that'sTerri.That'llbeTerriCoverley.35500:14:40,160-->00:14:41,878That'stheshitone,isn'tit?Yeah,she'stheshitone.35600:14:41,960-->00:14:44,872Oh,right.Well,shemightbeworthachat-up.35700:14:44,960-->00:14:48,191Let'sseeifshe'sdueabinning

whentheinevitableoccurs.35800:14:48,280-->00:14:50,350Everythingallrightwiththepathpeople?35900:14:50,440-->00:14:55,878Pathfinders.So,exclusionismassive,isn'tit?360

00:14:55,960-->00:14:57,916Well,I'mverysorry,buttheguidelinesonthis,36100:14:58,000-->00:15:00,195guidelineswhichyourgovernmentintroduced,remember,36200:15:00,280-->00:15:02,475withquiteasplashofpublicity,

36300:15:02,560-->00:15:06,838areperfectlyclear.Zerotoleranceonbullying.Zero.36400:15:06,920-->00:15:12,040It'sjustthepresswouldhaveafielddaywiththis,youknow?


29/53


30/53

00:15:57,240-->00:15:59,470Itwasyousprayedtheprivateinformationabouttheschool,wasn'tit?37900:15:59,560-->00:16:01,630LikeJensonButtonshakingupamagnumofpiss.38000:16:01,720-->00:16:02,755Oh,justlistentoyourself!38100:16:02,840-->00:16:05,798Okay,atfirstitwasprivateinformationbetweenyouandyourboss.38200:16:05,880-->00:16:08,235Thenitwasprivateinformationbetweenyouandyourgirlfriend,383

00:16:08,320-->00:16:11,551thenitwasprivateinformationbetweenyourgirlfriendandhercolleagues.38400:16:11,640-->00:16:13,232-Yeah.-Imean,Icandrawyouadiagram38500:16:13,320-->00:16:15,197ifyoulike,it'slikeafuckingswineflupandemic.

38600:16:15,280-->00:16:17,157I'veclearlymadeanerror,whichIhavetotakeupwithEmma.38700:16:17,240-->00:16:19,196-Youshouldn'tbefuckingusingit...-Exactly.Thisisyourfault.38800:16:19,280-->00:16:20,395

...forpolitical...No,no.-It'snotmyfault.38900:16:20,480-->00:16:22,198You'relikethemanwhofuckedthemonkeythatgaveusAIDS,39000:16:22,280-->00:16:23,315


31/53

that'swhoyouare.39100:16:23,400-->00:16:24,628I'mlikethemanwhodidwhat?39200:16:24,720-->00:16:26,358WhofuckedthemonkeythatgaveusAIDS?39300:16:26,440-->00:16:28,635I'lltellyousomethingandyou'llsay,"Itwasn'tme,itwasn'tme."39400:16:28,720-->00:16:30,517There'smonkeyshitonyourballs,notmine.39500:16:30,600-->00:16:32,795Iloveit,Iloveit.It'sthepre-matchsparring

39600:16:32,880-->00:16:36,190forthebigsupergayweighttitlefight,eh?39700:16:36,480-->00:16:39,711Okay,Oliver,wipeawaythepre-come.You'vegotsomeworktogetonwith.39800:16:39,800-->00:16:41,756

-Yeah,Malcolm...-What?39900:16:41,840-->00:16:44,308TheNicolathing,Ithink,isgettingabitworse.40000:16:44,400-->00:16:46,834Itlookslikeherdaughter'sabouttobeexcludedforbullying.

40100:16:46,920-->00:16:48,717Yeah,Iknow.Glenntoldmethat.40200:16:48,800-->00:16:50,153What?Whendid...40300:16:50,240-->00:16:52,913


32/53

Yeah.Thethingis,allwe'vegottodoisifwetryandkeepthisinfo40400:16:53,000-->00:16:54,911very,verycloselycontained,we'llbeallright,yeah?40500:16:55,000-->00:16:56,035-Okay.-Okay?40600:16:56,120-->00:16:57,712-Okay.-Onyougo.40700:16:58,120-->00:16:59,599Okay,ShiteheadRevisited,40800:16:59,680-->00:17:01,238

didyouknowthatNicolaMurray'sdaughter40900:17:01,320-->00:17:03,754isabouttobeexpelledfromschoolforfuckingbullying?41000:17:03,840-->00:17:05,637-Whatareyoudoing?-No.

41100:17:05,720-->00:17:08,154-Don'tworry.Didyounotknowthat?-No.WhywouldI...41200:17:08,240-->00:17:09,958Ofcourse,youwouldn'tknowthatnowbecausetheonlypeople41300:17:10,040-->00:17:14,556whoknowthatrightnowareMrsMurray,

herdaughter,Ollyandme,yeah.41400:17:14,640-->00:17:19,111Ifthisgetsintothepress,Iwouldknowthatitcamefromyou.41500:17:19,200-->00:17:20,189Clever.


33/53

41600:17:20,280-->00:17:21,315(CHUCKLING)41700:17:22,200-->00:17:24,998AndIwouldraindownuponyousohard41800:17:25,080-->00:17:28,470thatyou'dhavetobereassembledbyfuckingaircrashinvestigators.41900:17:28,560-->00:17:30,630-No...-Donotfuckinginterruptme,son,ever.42000:17:30,720-->00:17:33,314Now,getthisintothenoggin,right?421

00:17:33,400-->00:17:40,033Youbreatheawordofthistoanyone,youmincingfuckingcunt,42200:17:40,120-->00:17:41,792andIwilltearyourfuckingskinoff,42300:17:41,880-->00:17:43,950Iwillwearittoyourmother'sbirthdayparty

42400:17:44,040-->00:17:46,395andIwillrubyournutsupanddownherleg42500:17:46,480-->00:17:49,074whilstwhistlingBohemianfuckingRhapsody,right?42600:17:49,160-->00:17:51,037-Yeah.

-Now,42700:17:51,120-->00:17:54,078getoutofmyfuckingsight!42800:17:54,160-->00:17:55,275Yeah.


34/53

42900:17:58,560-->00:18:03,839I'vebeenkindofatargetforthepressand,uh,Ijust...43000:18:05,160-->00:18:08,277Idon'twantEllasufferingonmyaccount,really.43100:18:08,360-->00:18:10,954Look,it'spossible,theoreticallypossible43200:18:11,040-->00:18:16,433Icouldparktheexclusion,temporarily,maybe.43300:18:16,520-->00:18:18,158Thatwould...Thatwouldjustbesogreat.

43400:18:18,240-->00:18:20,549Butwewouldneedtodrawupapupilbehaviouralcontract.43500:18:20,640-->00:18:22,471-Youandyourhusband,together...-Absolutely.43600:18:22,560-->00:18:23,629

...andElla.-Obviously,yeah.43700:18:23,720-->00:18:27,508Thankyousomuch,thankyou,MrStone.Really,Ioweyouone.43800:18:27,600-->00:18:29,909AndI'lltalktoyouonaseparateoccasionaboutthething.

43900:18:30,000-->00:18:32,275-Yeah,streetwalkersthing.-Uh,pathfindersthing.44000:18:32,360-->00:18:33,793Itwasajoke.441


35/53

00:18:33,880-->00:18:35,711(LAUGHING)Itwasgood,wasn'tit?Verygood.44200:18:35,800-->00:18:38,030PETER:Allright,thanksforyourhelp.44300:18:38,120-->00:18:39,917-Whereareyougoing?-GoingthroughathingwithMalcolm44400:18:40,000-->00:18:42,150aboutNicola'sdaughter.She'sbeingexcludedfromschool,44500:18:42,240-->00:18:43,912butdon'ttellanyoneorI'mdead,okay?44600:18:44,000-->00:18:45,638

Everyoneknowsthat,it'salloverthebuilding.44700:18:45,720-->00:18:47,233Aseniorcivilservanttoldme.44800:18:47,320-->00:18:50,118Oh,shit!I'mstraighttoDVD,I'mthenightshift.449

00:18:50,200-->00:18:51,235Malcolm'sgonnakillme.45000:18:51,320-->00:18:53,231Hisbark'sworsethanhisbite.45100:18:53,320-->00:18:54,309MALCOLM:Ah,Peter!45200:18:54,400-->00:18:56,630

Speakingofrabiesinjections,hereheis.45300:18:56,720-->00:19:00,918Ididn'tknowyouwerestillalive.How'stheold'80stributebandgoing?45400:19:01,000-->00:19:03,195


36/53

StilldoingtheRobertPalmerlook-alikeything,huh?45500:19:03,280-->00:19:06,431(CHUCKLING)Malcolm,you'relookingwellforsomeonetwiceyourage.45600:19:06,520-->00:19:07,953Anynewsontheaneurysm?45700:19:08,040-->00:19:09,155(BOTHLAUGHING)45800:19:09,240-->00:19:12,312Funnyman,funny,funnyman.Seeyoulater.45900:19:13,040-->00:19:15,110Whydon'tyoufindout

howtheirdataback-upworks,46000:19:15,200-->00:19:17,156I'vegotameetingwithleakyTerri.46100:19:17,240-->00:19:19,470Oh,thatsoundedwrong.46200:19:23,760-->00:19:25,876Iwanttotalkaboutthesocial

networkingthatthedaughteruses.46300:19:25,960-->00:19:28,349IssheonFacebookorBebo,doessheTwitter?46400:19:28,440-->00:19:30,351AreanyofhervictimsonFacebookorTwitter?465

00:19:30,440-->00:19:31,668Hereontheleft,we'vegottheGuardian.46600:19:31,760-->00:19:32,954What'stheweatherlikeovertheGuardian?467


37/53

00:19:33,040-->00:19:34,473Howdowecounter-massage,yeah?46800:19:34,560-->00:19:36,391Tobecompletelyhonest,Stewart,I'mjustcurious46900:19:36,480-->00:19:38,391astowhatthepressisgoingtomakeofthis.That'sall...47000:19:38,480-->00:19:40,311Yeah.Yeah,ofcourseyouare.Whichistheentirepurpose47100:19:40,400-->00:19:42,470ofthematrixtobeginwith.Look.47200:19:42,560-->00:19:43,675

WhatIwanttodoisjust,kindof,47300:19:43,760-->00:19:46,194graphiciseandthree-dimensionaliseourresponse.47400:19:46,280-->00:19:48,430-Stageone,storyleaks,ourresponse.-Uh-huh.475

00:19:48,520-->00:19:50,829-Wemoveforwardtostagetwo.-Mmm-hmm.47600:19:50,920-->00:19:53,195What'sourre-responsewhenthepresscomebacktous?47700:19:53,280-->00:19:55,271Andthen,wemoveforwardagaintostagethree.

47800:19:55,360-->00:19:58,158What'sourresponsetotheirresponsetoourresponse?47900:19:58,240-->00:20:01,710We'vegottathinkmulti-dimensional.It'sfractalretaliation.


38/53

48000:20:01,800-->00:20:04,519Mmm-hmm.Doyoufancyacupoftea?48100:20:04,600-->00:20:06,795-Yeah,yougotanythingherbal?-Okay,yeah.48200:20:07,160-->00:20:08,559Oh,sorry,doyousmoke?48300:20:08,640-->00:20:11,200-Oh!Aretheylow-tar?-Mmm-hmm.48400:20:11,280-->00:20:12,429That'smyfavourite.485

00:20:12,520-->00:20:15,273(CHUCKLES)We'readyingbreed,eh?48600:20:15,360-->00:20:16,588Oh,yes.48700:20:19,040-->00:20:22,874We'vemetbefore,whenyouwereaDefraasajuniorminister.488

00:20:22,960-->00:20:25,758Oh,sorry,Idon'tremember.Wereyouatthedepartment?48900:20:25,840-->00:20:28,070No,no,no.IwasatSainsbury's.49000:20:28,160-->00:20:29,991Press,notonthetills.491

00:20:30,080-->00:20:35,200AndIsetupthephotoshootforyouwiththesustainableseabass.49200:20:35,280-->00:20:36,429-Uh-huh.-AndIrememberyoumade493


39/53

00:20:36,520-->00:20:40,399somekindofquipabout,uh,somethingtodowithfishnets.49400:20:41,560-->00:20:43,869'Causetherewasagirlwhowaswearingstockings,yousee.49500:20:43,960-->00:20:45,313Well,thatcertainlydatesit.49600:20:45,400-->00:20:48,073Youwouldn'tbeabletomakethatkindofcommentnow.49700:20:48,160-->00:20:49,275(BOTHLAUGHING)49800:20:49,360-->00:20:51,476

More'sthepity.49900:20:51,560-->00:20:56,509How'sNicolacoping?Sometroublewithherdaughter,bullyingorsomething?50000:20:56,600-->00:21:00,434Herdaughterbeingbullied?Thepoorlittlething.501

00:21:00,520-->00:21:03,717Imean,justbecauseshe'sputonabitofweight.50200:21:04,200-->00:21:05,553(MOBILERINGING)50300:21:06,040-->00:21:09,749Ah,Stewart,whatflavourofnutbrownpissareyougoingtopourintomyear?

50400:21:09,840-->00:21:11,751How'stheinfopumpfiring?50500:21:11,840-->00:21:14,434Oh,youmeanTerriCoverley?She'suseless,sheknowsnothing.506


40/53

00:21:14,520-->00:21:15,669Youtwowouldgeton.50700:21:15,760-->00:21:19,116Well,shemaynotknowthestory,Peter,butjustabouteverybodyelsedoes.50800:21:19,200-->00:21:20,599So,accordingtothematrixhere,50900:21:20,680-->00:21:24,229we'relookingatan83to90%chanceofthisstorymakingit.51000:21:24,320-->00:21:26,311Andifitdoes,well,someone'sgonnauseit.51100:21:26,400-->00:21:29,039

Andifsomeoneis,thenthatsomeoneshouldbeus,yeah?51200:21:29,120-->00:21:30,519Noway,we'renotgonnadothis.51300:21:30,600-->00:21:34,229Peter,listentome,nooneismoreshockedthanIam514

00:21:34,320-->00:21:36,550atthechainofeventshere,okay?51500:21:36,640-->00:21:39,279Howaboutyougettingbackheresowecanhavealittledebrief?51600:21:39,360-->00:21:42,079Fuckthat,Stewart!Wearenotgoingtousethisstory.

51700:21:42,160-->00:21:43,912I'dlovetonatter,unfortunatelyIthink51800:21:44,000-->00:21:46,195I'vegotanothercallcomingthrough.519


41/53

00:21:47,400-->00:21:50,836Peter?Hello.Didyouwantanotherfag?52000:21:50,920-->00:21:52,273CanIseeNicola?52100:21:52,360-->00:21:55,158TERRl:Well,that'sabitofaprotocolything,so,um...52200:21:55,240-->00:21:58,550It'sapersonalmatter,I'lljust...52300:22:00,400-->00:22:01,628Whatthefuckishedoinghere?52400:22:01,720-->00:22:03,950Haveyoulockedthebuilding

sohecan'tgetout?52500:22:04,040-->00:22:06,918CouldIhaveawordaboutyourschoolsituation?52600:22:07,000-->00:22:09,958It'snobigdeal,really.It'sjustthatoldperennial,isn'tit?527

00:22:10,040-->00:22:12,270ShouldIsendmykidstopublicschool?52800:22:12,360-->00:22:14,555Imeantaboutthebullying.52900:22:14,640-->00:22:17,677Uh,right.Canyou...Comein.Sitdown,Peter.

53000:22:17,760-->00:22:18,909Howdoyouknowaboutthat?53100:22:19,000-->00:22:22,037Well,everyonehereknows,andsomeofourlotknow.532


42/53

00:22:22,120-->00:22:23,155Someofyourlotknow?53300:22:23,240-->00:22:26,391There'squitealotofpressureonmefromabovetouseit,53400:22:26,480-->00:22:28,710butIjustwantedyoutoknowthatIwon't.53500:22:28,800-->00:22:30,119Thankyou.53600:22:30,680-->00:22:34,832Um,I'dliketothinkI'ddothesameforyou,IthinkIwould.53700:22:34,920-->00:22:40,119

Well,it'sonlyDoSAC,sockofshit.53800:22:40,200-->00:22:44,478Sorry,it'swhatwecallDoSACoverthereintheenemycamp.53900:22:44,560-->00:22:49,190SocialAffairsCitizenship,Soc-Af-Cit,sockofshit,nodisrespect.

54000:22:49,280-->00:22:52,238You'vegottimeonyourhandsoveronthedarkside.54100:22:52,320-->00:22:54,595I'llleaveyoutogetonwithit.54200:22:54,680-->00:22:57,433Thankyoufordoingthehonourablething.

54300:23:03,480-->00:23:07,359What?Haveyoujustgoogledthat?Isthat...Whatisthat?54400:23:07,440-->00:23:11,149Ollydidthat.Nothingtodowithme,Idon'twanttofellateyou.


43/53

54500:23:11,240-->00:23:13,231Well,IknowI'mplanningbigchangesaroundhere,54600:23:13,320-->00:23:15,117butnothingalongthoselines.54700:23:15,200-->00:23:17,316Getinmyofficenow,andyou,Glenn.54800:23:17,400-->00:23:20,676MannionknowsaboutElla,andIwanttoknowhow?54900:23:20,760-->00:23:23,115-Whodidyoutell?-IonlytoldGlenn.

55000:23:23,200-->00:23:25,270-IonlymentionedittoGlenn...-IonlytoldMalcolm.55100:23:25,360-->00:23:26,475YoutoldMalcolmwhat?55200:23:26,560-->00:23:28,835Ellahasbeenexcludedfor...

55300:23:28,920-->00:23:30,433-Nearly!-Nearlyexcluded55400:23:30,520-->00:23:32,431forbullyingotherchildren.55500:23:32,520-->00:23:33,714-Oh,she'sthebully?-Yes.Yes.

55600:23:33,800-->00:23:36,519-Oh!Oh,that'snasty.-Well,that'shelpful.55700:23:36,600-->00:23:39,239Couldyoukeepyourfuckingopinionstoyourself,please?


44/53

55800:23:39,320-->00:23:42,676Well,youcan'tuseit,canyou?Sowhotoldyou?55900:23:42,760-->00:23:45,399Coverley,Comms.Sorry,Nicola,justgottotakethis.56000:23:45,480-->00:23:46,549OllyReeder.56100:23:46,640-->00:23:47,834Sowhatyou'resayingisyoudoknowaboutit...56200:23:47,920-->00:23:49,035TERRl:She'slookingabitupset.

56300:23:49,120-->00:23:50,792Right,right.Butyou'renotgoingtouseit?56400:23:50,880-->00:23:52,233Oh,well,thanksfortellingus.Yeah...56500:23:52,320-->00:23:54,231Yes,obviouslyyoucan'tuseit,that's...

56600:23:54,320-->00:23:55,435Oh,youknowaboutit,doyou?56700:23:55,520-->00:23:57,033I'mgoinghome.I'mgoingtoseemydaughter,56800:23:57,120-->00:23:59,350I'mgoingtogiveherabigkiss

andthebollockingofherlife.56900:23:59,440-->00:24:03,274Nicola,justgotatextfromMalcolm.He'ssaysheknowsMannionwashere.57000:24:03,360-->00:24:04,509Textreads,


45/53

57100:24:04,600-->00:24:08,479"Iknowaboutyourfuckingmeetingwiththatageingflamencoguitarist.57200:24:08,560-->00:24:11,358"YouareNOT..."Bigletters."...togohome.57300:24:11,440-->00:24:12,839"There'sbeenanescalation."57400:24:12,920-->00:24:14,239-Shit.-HesayshewantsyouatNumber10,57500:24:14,320-->00:24:16,436ASAFP.

57600:24:16,520-->00:24:19,637-Fmeaning...-"Feasibly",Ishouldimagine.57700:24:22,320-->00:24:27,269Stewart,you'restillhere?TowhatdoIowethispain?57800:24:27,360-->00:24:32,036It'scalledpolitics,Peter.

We'retryingtodoitfromyouroffice.57900:24:32,120-->00:24:35,510I'vetoldNicolaMurrayI'mnotcapitalisingonthatstory.58000:24:35,600-->00:24:36,794I'mspeechless!58100:24:36,880-->00:24:38,996

Doyouwanttogetbootedoutoftheshadowcabinet?58200:24:39,080-->00:24:42,117You'rewantingtospendmoretimehidingfromyourwifeinthegreenhouse?58300:24:42,200-->00:24:44,316


46/53

Yes,ifitcametoit!58400:24:44,400-->00:24:46,960Ifyouhavetowadethroughallthisshittowintheelection,58500:24:47,040-->00:24:49,031thenI'mhappytoloseit,allright?58600:24:49,640-->00:24:50,789Malcolm?58700:24:50,880-->00:24:53,075Hi,Nicola,thanksverymuchforcomingover.58800:24:53,160-->00:24:54,593Uh,canIgetyousomething?

58900:24:54,680-->00:24:56,398Actually,youhaven'tgotanywhisky,haveyou?59000:24:56,480-->00:24:59,870Whisky?Yeah.Hasn'tbeentouchedforawhile.59100:24:59,960-->00:25:02,394StillgotAnthonyEden's

lipstickonthebottle.59200:25:02,480-->00:25:04,436Hey,doyourememberwhenyoustarted,59300:25:04,520-->00:25:07,114IsaidIdidn'thavemuchofafolderonyou?59400:25:07,200-->00:25:08,599

Youshouldseeitnow.59500:25:08,680-->00:25:12,150Lookslikeafuckingbutcher'sslab,justasgraphic.59600:25:12,240-->00:25:15,516Right.So,canwe...Ineedtogethome.


47/53

59700:25:15,600-->00:25:17,033Yousaidthere'dbeenanescalation.59800:25:17,120-->00:25:19,998Thegoodnewsisthateventhougheverybody'sgotthisbullyingstory,59900:25:20,080-->00:25:21,195noonecanuseit.60000:25:21,280-->00:25:24,352Good.But...I'msensingthereisa"but",60100:25:24,440-->00:25:26,112probablythesizeofafuckinghouse.602

00:25:26,200-->00:25:30,159Thebadnewsisthattheywillrunwith"Headteacherbendstherules60300:25:30,240-->00:25:32,595"andgivespreferentialtreatmenttocabinetminister."60400:25:32,680-->00:25:34,591It'sunacceptable.

60500:25:34,680-->00:25:39,071TheBoardofGovernorshavenochoice,he'llhavetoresign.60600:25:39,160-->00:25:40,388No,no,no.No.60700:25:40,480-->00:25:42,789Yeah,I'mafraidit'sfuckoff,MrChips.

60800:25:42,880-->00:25:45,075No!Itshouldbemewhoresigns.60900:25:45,160-->00:25:48,311Youresignnow,you'llbeuptherewiththefuckingshaggers


48/53

61000:25:48,400-->00:25:49,833andexpensesfiddlers61100:25:49,920-->00:25:53,356andtheguyswhoasphyxiatethemselveshavingawankinaTravelodge.61200:25:53,440-->00:25:54,953Andyourdaughter,yourElla,61300:25:55,040-->00:26:00,034shewillbepubliclyandvery,veryfuckinghorriblyhumiliated.61400:26:00,120-->00:26:02,873Now,thatisnotsomethingthathelpsanybody.615

00:26:02,960-->00:26:04,678Itdoesn't...Hey,hey,hey,comeon,look.61600:26:04,760-->00:26:07,593Thatisnot...Look,itdoesn't...61700:26:08,440-->00:26:10,510That'snotaplan,isit,Stan?618

00:26:10,600-->00:26:14,070Comeon,that'snotanagenda,Brenda.Comeon.61900:26:16,000-->00:26:19,913AndI'mstayingheretodowhat,exactly?62000:26:20,000-->00:26:23,595BecauseIdon'tfeellikeI'm...Sorry.

62100:26:23,680-->00:26:24,999(SNIFFLES)62200:26:25,080-->00:26:27,674Idon'tfeellikeI'mreallymakingthingsbetter.623


49/53

00:26:27,760-->00:26:31,116Listen,Nicky,this,it'sawar,right?62400:26:31,200-->00:26:32,349It'safuckingwar.62500:26:32,440-->00:26:36,558Now,youcan'tchangeathingunlessyouwinthewar.62600:26:36,640-->00:26:40,076Andyoucannotwinthewarunlessyouarepreparedtofight.62700:26:40,160-->00:26:42,310That'swhatthisallaboutforyou,isn'tit?62800:26:42,400-->00:26:46,552

It'sjustaboutfightingandfuckingpower.62900:26:47,320-->00:26:52,110Doesitneveroccurtoyouthatyourpoisonousmaleobsessionwithconflict,63000:26:52,200-->00:26:54,760whichismakingpeopledespisepolitics?631

00:26:54,840-->00:26:57,195Andbytheway,don'teverfuckingcallmeNicky!63200:26:57,280-->00:27:00,238Sparemeyourfuckingpsycho-fanny,right?63300:27:00,320-->00:27:02,959WhatdoyouthinkfuckingMannion'sdoingrightnow?

63400:27:03,040-->00:27:05,634MichaelAspel'scooler,fuckingyoungerbrother?63500:27:05,720-->00:27:07,073I'lltellyouwhathe'sdoing.


50/53

63600:27:07,160-->00:27:10,391He'ssittingaroundwithhispals.Youknowwhatthey'redoing?63700:27:10,480-->00:27:14,029They'retellingveryfuckingnastyjokesaboutyourfamily.63800:27:14,120-->00:27:18,193They'replayingfuckingpinthecockonthefuckingdonkey'sface63900:27:18,280-->00:27:21,272withyourfacethere,'causeyou'rethefuckingdonkey,right?64000:27:21,360-->00:27:24,272Soyoushouldjustfuckingcountyourblessings!

64100:27:24,360-->00:27:26,396Ella'snotbeenexcluded!64200:27:26,960-->00:27:28,393That'swhatyouwanted,right?64300:27:28,480-->00:27:30,357-Yes?-Yeah,Ireallywanted

64400:27:30,440-->00:27:32,954...Ellatobeabletostayatashitschool,64500:27:33,040-->00:27:36,157theonlyredeemingfeatureofwhichwastheheadmaster,64600:27:36,240-->00:27:38,959

whothankstomehasnowbeenforcedout.64700:27:39,040-->00:27:40,678Yeah,well,um...64800:27:41,520-->00:27:42,748Maybe...


51/53

64900:27:45,040-->00:27:47,349Maybeinatermorso,youknow,65000:27:47,960-->00:27:53,478wemightunderstandifyouveryquietlydecidedtomoveher.65100:27:53,560-->00:27:55,312Really?65200:27:55,400-->00:27:56,515Yeah.65300:27:58,560-->00:28:01,279Good.Good.Okay,soit'sMannion.65400:28:01,360-->00:28:04,636

Whatdowedo?Imean,dowegoafterhimwithoneofyour,65500:28:04,720-->00:28:06,153youknow,thingsthatyousay,65600:28:06,240-->00:28:09,391likeabigbumdildoofvengeanceorsomething?657

00:28:09,480-->00:28:11,835Thereyougo,that'smygirl,yeah.65800:28:11,920-->00:28:15,356IndianaMurrayandtheBumDildoofVengeance.65900:28:15,440-->00:28:16,714Ilikeit.660

00:28:16,800-->00:28:20,588Hey,doyouwanthismobilenumber?66100:28:21,680-->00:28:23,159ThatwasNicolaMurray.Shesays66200:28:23,240-->00:28:28,030fromnowon,nothing


52/53

inmyprivatelifeisofflimits.66300:28:28,120-->00:28:29,155Hasshegotanythingshecoulduse?66400:28:29,240-->00:28:30,275No,Idon'tthinkso.66500:28:30,360-->00:28:32,191PHIL:HetookapissagainstBigBenonhisstagnight.66600:28:32,280-->00:28:33,599Idon'treckonthey'llusethat.Andthelovechild,66700:28:33,680-->00:28:34,829-that'sbeenandgone,hasn'tit?-Yeah.

66800:28:34,920-->00:28:38,037Wecouldhavehadshotsofherscuttlingintoherhouse,66900:28:38,120-->00:28:41,556scurryingoutagaintomakesomehumiliatingpublicstatement,67000:28:41,640-->00:28:45,155

surroundedbymembersofherfamily,allgrinninglikeAlsatians.67100:28:45,240-->00:28:48,755Doyourememberthat,Peter,whenthepregnantmistressstorybroke,eh?67200:28:48,840-->00:28:50,956YouandMrsMannionstandingonyourdoorstep,

67300:28:51,040-->00:28:53,395hernevergoingtotouchlittlePeteragain?67400:28:53,480-->00:28:56,790ThepresstalkingaboutCheaterMannion.


53/53

67500:28:56,880-->00:28:58,677Everyonereadingabouthowyouliketomakelove67600:28:58,760-->00:29:01,035toJeffWayne'sWaroftheWorlds.

999900:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00www.tvsubtitles.net

the thick of it - 3x04

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