Introductory RemarksWe have in To The Lighthouse a galaxy of fictional characters whose earnest endeavour is toestablish, with varying degrees of success, happy and healthy relationship with the peoplearound them. Accepting this as its main theme the novel may justly be called a study of the waysand means by which satisfactory human relationship might be established with the peoplearound them. This is because human beings seemed to Mrs. Woolf isolated and communicationbetween them partial and often far from satisfactory.Words are InadequateIn human society words are the main sources of communication between one person andanother. Unfortunately words are very often inadequate for the purpose. And hence this is oneof the main reasons for the failure to establish healthy and satisfactory human relationships. Thedifficulty is that very often words cannot express the full complexity of a characters thoughtsand feelings. Then again what the words express is only a fraction of what a character thinks andfeels, and as a result they become misleading. These aspects of verbal inadequacy were quiteevident to Mrs. Woolf. And many of her characters reveal this inadequacy in a distinct manner.Lily feels this strongly as in the third part of the novel she is seen standing near to Carmichaelon the lawn and trying to explain Mrs. Ramsay: And she wanted to say not one thing, but everything. Little words that broke up the thought and dismembered it, said nothing. About life,about death; about Mrs. Ramsayno she thought one could say nothing to nobody. The urgencyof the moment always missed the mark. Words fluttered sideways and struck the object inchesto low. Then one gave it up; for how could one express in words these emotions of the body?Silence is More EloquentVery often it is found that silence is more expressive and eloquent than words. And Lily realisesit fully. She feels in greater communication with Carmichael than if they had spoken. Theresitting on the lawn in perfect silence they seem to understand each other perfectly well withoutexchanging even a single word. And in the final chapter of the novel Lily justly feels: They hadnot needed to speak. They had been thinking the same thing and he had answered her without,her asking him anything. Thus it is revealed to us that silence is often more expressive and moreeloquent than words words that fall to express these emotions of the body, and leads to theestablishment of happy human relationships.The Trivial and its ImportanceIn the novel we also find that how things trivial or of very little importance are greatly helpful inestablishing congenial human relationships. In the beginning of the third or final movement ofthe book we find Mr. Ramsay the widower coming to Lily demanding sympathy. She really feelsvery helpless and words fail her in the beginning. Suddenly his boots catch her eyes and shepraises his boots. This brings great relief and Mr. Ramsay feels satisfied. Apparently Lilysremarks may seem silly or comic. But Mr. Ramsay smiled. His pall, his draperies, his infirmities

fell from him. Thus it helped to establish perfect sympathy and understanding between Lily andMr. Ramsay and Lily felt her eyes swell and tingle with tears.Need of Sympathy and UnderstandingCongenial and satisfactory human relationships are essential for happiness in our life. Logic,reason and intellect are of very little help to us for this purpose. It is through the emotions wecan establish such relationships. Emotional understanding and a genuine sympathetic attitudeare greatly needed for satisfactory relationships even between parents and children, andhusband and wife. And in the very first scene of the novel we find how far the lack of thesemental aspects Mr. Ramsay becomes an intolerable tyrant or a sarcastic brute in the eyes of hischildren. He tells James the dire truth it wont be finewithout caring a bit for a young childsdreams and desires. And James feels like gashing a hole in his fathers breast to kill him thereand then. But Mrs. Ramsay with her loving soul and sympathetic understanding wins the heartof the children and is tremendously loved and admired by her children. She undoubtedlysoothes them by telling them that the weather might change for the better. But it is only to makethe world a better and happier place.Mrs. Ramsays great RoleVirginia Woolf shows us in many ways that Mrs. Ramsay plays a very significant part in To TheLighthouse to establish communication between people. This is first revealed in her genuineattempts to get Paul and Minta as well as Lily and Mr. Bankes married. And it is shown verynicely and convincingly at the dinner party where she makes the most sincere effort to getpeople talking, to involve them and so to create something of the time they are together. In fact,almost throughout the novel we find the movements of characters towards one another from thestate of isolation in which each one of us is trapped by his own sense of inadequacy or his privateworries. In this respect Tansley is a very good example. His is the picture of a man who issensitive with his feelings of social inferiority. He is poor and unattractive. That is why he wantsto assert himself in a rude and rough manner. He repels and displeases almost all except Mr.Ramsay. Mrs. Ramsays ideas and feelings about him vary, but she is pictured as the rare personwho can make others show their best side, and she draws from him simple and selflessbehaviour and feeling, which are just as much part of her personality as rudeness. And this isnicely revealed when they are found walking together in the very opening scene of the novel.Then again in the dinner scene we find how Mrs. Ramsay prevails on Lily to help Tansley out ofa very odd and unhappy situation. At the dinner party he is desperately trying to assert himself,to make an impression on the conversation without very little success. And this irritates himmore and more. To Lily he is already repulsive and she wont help him in any way in thebeginning. But when Mrs. Ramsay with her good sense and sympathetic understanding silentlyimplores Lilys help in making the party comfortable, she accomplishes her task in rehabilitatingthe preverted person. And Tansley takes this opportunity and begins to blossom forth in talk; hisegotism is now satisfied and he is able to shine in the company of the guests. So it is revealed tous that due to tact and good sense of Mrs. Ramsay satisfactory relationship between Tansley andothers at the table is thus established and the party becomes a real success. This happens inspite of the fact that there is a note of pretence and falsehood even in Lilys second invitation to

Tansley to accompany her to the Lighthouse. But this may be justified as the necessities of politesocial relationships demanded it. .Mr. and Mrs. Ramsay: Their RelationshipThere is a note of pretence and falsehood even in the husband-wife relationship between Mr.and Mrs. Ramsay. Mrs. Ramsay cannot but praise Mr. Ramsay to his face just to booster up hisconfidence in a way she feels should not be necessary. He is in constant need of being reassured.His fear of failure, his resentment that he has achieved less than he should have and that hisbooks will not last, pervert his judgement, leading him to see in praise of other mens worksdisparagement of himself. This undoubtedly puts a strain on his wife and she has to concealthings for him. Again on Mr. Ramsays, side too there is some sort of reserve. Mrs. Ramsayspessimistic conviction of the misery of life distresses him, and then he is unable to communicatewith her in her moods of sadness. It saddened him and her remoteness pained him..He coulddo nothing to her. He must stand by and watch her. Indeed, the infernal truth was, he madethings worse for her. But on the other hand, his dependence on Mrs. Ramsay and her respectand reverence for him balance these areas of difference between them.The first movement of the novel The Window, traces the pattern of their relationship veryskillfully from one extreme to another. In the very first scene we find them at their farthest apartwhen their disagreement about going to the Lighthouse brings out their difference quite sharplyin their attitudes to life. Mr. Ramsay is upset, is rather infuriated. The extraordinaryirrationality of her remark, the folly of womens minds enraged him..and now she flew in theface of facts, made her children hope what was utterly out of the question, in effect, told lies.Mrs. Ramsays Attitude: Final ReconciliationMrs. Ramsay is also upset in her own way. With her loving heart and sympathetic bent of mindshe wants to make people happy in this world and longs for protecting her children from losingthe contented innocence of childhood. Hence her husbands irrational and stern attitude seemsto her equally repugnant, to pursue truth with such astonishing lack of consideration for otherpeoples feelings, to rend the thin veils of civilization so wantonly, so brutally, was to her sohorrible an outrage of human decency. But very soon after this incident they begin to cometogether again. It starts with Mrs. Ramsays apology. And after this we find that the remainingsections of The Window move towards the moment at the end, when the firm asperity of themasculine mind, which she admires in him, curbs her gloomy thoughts and she is able, thoughindirectly, to assure him of her love. And as she looked at him she began to smile, for thoughshe has not said a word, he knew, of course that she loved him.ConclusionWe may now rightly assert that To The Lighthouse very reveals a close study of the ways andmeans by which satisfactory and congenial human relationships might be established. And Mrs.Ramsay, who is the centre around which action and movement are built, plays the mostsignificant role as a force by holding together almost all the characters and incidents of this greatnovel.