The Sydney Hash House

Harriers

Smiley’s Posh Chronicle

Run Date: May 25th Run No. 2498

Run No 2499 hosted by Superglue

Superglue was not having a good start when the proprietor of the Ajmers

Indian Restaurant tried to bump his booking for one of his Indian mates

claiming a prior booking ( means in Hindi -have good business judgment, you are not

aggressive in your dealings because you do not like to create issues.- Super had sussed this out

previously)

Not to be put off, Superglue was quite

polite when he said

“if you don’t honour this fucking booking I

will come and jam some papadams down

your fucking gob”

Of course this polite approach worked a

treat and the Hash booking was restored

honourably

With Spud and Little Shit chomping at the bit, the pack of some 35 souls were

off into the winter evening in brass monkey territory

Over Sydney Road and down through the new Totem apartment and shopping

complex

Up ahead the pack now in proceeding along Lombard and Brighton Street

noticed President Pee Dub was remonstrating with Pay- Ling about the

injustices of the green police locking up national parks from those loving,

caring and environmentally responsible 4 wheel drivers

“WTF” do they think they are doing” said Pee Dub now frothing st the mouth

“All we tree hugging 4 wheel drivers want to do is knock over a few kangas,

flatten some bush, create some more tracks and generally fuck the place- not

too much to ask is it?”

The Runners were in for a treat tonight with a real

runner setting it

Nautilus, Plunger and the 2 shits had started well

out of the blocks with Your Choice and Music Man,

having nearly regained their former running glory,

were not far behind. Music Man, always the man

about town, was quick to help an attractive brunette

in her car looking for directions. Regrettably the

brief dalliance was not captured on camera.

Meanwhile Spud wearing his colourful Tour de Pisse

shirt had forgotten to tie his shoelaces and was well

behind the pack still stranded in the Totem.

The trail now became Marlee Street with the pack showing deference to Chez

Superglue as E Shit and Jimmy ( annointed as potential committee slave by

Pee Dub) had a dual piss opposite

From the Condover Street stairs to Kimo street then a right to Water Reserve Road the trail

had a check on the edge of the bush. Kitty Litty, now several kg’s lighter from his Peruvian jungle juice purging and Andres mountain climbing experience, was sprinting well ahead just on the Long Walkers/Runners trail as he had done a few weeks earlier up the slopes to Macchu Pichu

The hare had the slow walkers including Lost Patrol, Frenchie, Ayatollah + walking stick and Hanoi Bill heading back to home, via the road overbridge. The runners and walkers trail was skirting the edge of the Manly Dam reserve as the long

walkers including Druid, Goanna and Virginus Illegitimus peeled off to the left with the

runners going ahead into the forboding darkness of the Wakehursy Golf Club with a check at the main gates Little Shit, as usua,l went through the check with his regular affliction of laryngitis kicking

in, while the trio of Music man, Flying Scotsman and Plunger were taking no chances

Meanwhile the runners, long and short walkers

trail had crossed over the Burn’t Bridge road

deviation with the golf course on the left as the

Goon and Pee Dub ( now subdued) made a

perfect couple striding side by side up Abingdon

Street ( from MG car fame) to the right with

Calici Virus, Scud, Simmo and Baron Von Drut

following close behind

and were staying a tight bunch as, they passed Little Shit who was checking in the wrong direction. As usual Little Shit, in his own diplomatic manner, had vented numerous

adjectives suggesting that the said trio had kept the trail to themselves without calling ON –

ON -mmmmm

Benny was now separated from the runners and had entered the golf club going

around in circles, even thinking he might get some putting practice in.

Nautilus Tic Toc and White Shit were at the pearly gates struggling to make

any senses out of the various Super markings

With Plunger’s superb local knowledge from runs past, the trio gathered the

other Shits, Benny, Nautilus and Kitty Litter and joined the long walkers at

Woolgoolga street for the run on the homeward trail.

With a check at Worrobil Street, the runners separated again from the Long

Walkers including the birthday boy, S Bends, Scud and Goonshow who were

back over the Burn’t Bridge deviation overbridge to home. E shit was also in the

mix giving Jimmy lessons on hashing language and vernacular to avoid the

embarrassment of having to front the hash protocol committee.

The running group, with their numbers somewhat depleted, now all together

still had a way to go as they went through the graffiti infested Burn’t bridge

tunnel then over the pedestrian flyover on Sydney Road. Home and Indian food

was now in sight as the boys arrived back at the Condamine Street car park

The outside temperature was a catalyst for a quick retreat from the bucket to

the warm interior of Rahjids only to be confronted by a semi-naked man in the

form of Tic Toc showing off his superior torso and pecs!

Now inside the restaurant the boys were looking forward to some hearty Indian

tuckers only to be told by Centrepoint that the committee is broke and an

Goonshow, ever the shy one, and now

having regained his verticular

confidence, was also claiming that

indeed he- yes he, not Tic Toc, was

the Gong Ride pioneers from the 90’s –

of course this shirt could have come

from anywhere – this claim would

never meet the intellectual rigour

often espoused by the Goonshow on

others !!

extra $2 corkage fee would be necessary whereupon a mini revolt was beginning

to take hold from the usually troublesome Scud corner

After consuming some beautiful rice and more rice and soup /come curry

President Pee Dub was eying off the pizza hut shop opposite

Down Downs were given to the hare, Superglue for a well thought out and

interesting run, to Kitty Litter after his challenging trip to Peru and warding off

marauding harriettes, to Ayatollah after a fact finding tour to Japan to suss out

it’s date market potential and finally to S Bends on reaching the grand old age

of 101 ( 2015- year book birth date) or was it 71

Another great run from Super with lots of lots of ups and downs and with a pace

intentionally slow enough to ensure we got round the trail and lived to tell the tale.

Pee Dub was spruiking the

upcoming Event of the Century on

June 1 and Simmo reported on his

recent visit to see God Knows

including the plan to get him to the

2500 Run next week – well done

Simmo !

Of course the highlight of the

evening was Pee Dub’s new fashion

statement no doubt styled on Dame

Edna’s

On On next week to the 25th Century Run – the event of the Century

Your Hash Journey

Back again by popular demand courtesy of Flying Scotsman

Receding Hairline

Runs:

******* ********* ********

Next Week’s Run No 2500:

Date: Monday June 1st

Time: A Traditional 6.30 pm start

Hares: Moishe and the Committee

Where: 3 Grattan Crescent, Bantry Bay

On On: 3 Grattan Crescent, Bantry Bay

Distance: 9 km

Time: 58 min

Elevation gained: 0 m Elevation lost: 0 m

Max Elevation: 0m

BRING YOUR TORCHES – they help and increase your safety If you don’t bring one you will have the wrath of Moishe descent upon you !!!!

Run No 2501: June 8th : Join the Botany Bay H3 to celebrate their 1500th Run, St

Peters ( see below) ( this day is a Public Holiday)

Run No 2502 Virginus Illegitimus: Somewhere around Mosman again !

***** NOTE:

• Hash Safety- take your mobile phone with you on runs !!!!! and have the committee’s mobile numbers in your directory- the defibrillator will be manned at the bucket – being prepared can save a life!

• It is nearly now truly winter runs so torches are standard issue for these runs.

Events for 2015

• 2500 Century Run – next week!! – only 4 sleeping nights to go -if you have not registered or paid get in in NOW Register on the SH3 web site or http://goo.gl/forms/fE4w8SGP1b

We have over 140 attending from Sydney & NSW, Other states and overseas – it will

be a grand event not to be missed !!

• Botany Bay Hash House Harriers

Convicts – 1500th Run

Botany Bay Hash 1500th Run : Our Run No 2501 Monday June 8th @ 3pm See BH3 for Registration – By Presidential decree: this will be the normal Monday night SH3 run to be joined by the other Sydney Hashes to celebrate their major milestone

When: Monday 8th of June 2015 at 3.00pm (Registrations from 2.30pm)

Where: The Pavilion, Sydney Park - Euston Road, St Peters (Alan Davidson

Oval) –take a train to St Peters Station !

Cost: $30.00 –food & booze

• The Annual Relay September 12th: Relay No 47 has been announced by Wagga

and this year it will be held at Kirra on the Gold coast (5 minutes from Cooloongatta

airport).

Registrations are open now so see Kitty Litter for information

Hash Sick Bed Corner

God Knows

A few guys have been dropping in to see Harry with Simmo on Monday

Phone: (02) 9369 0100 *****

We are going to get a special wheel chair friendly taxi to take him to the 2500th Run next

Monday – On On God Knows !!

Darwin Don

Darwin is going well with the specialist’s marveling over his “clean as a whistle” arteries

(most hashmen would be jealous !!) Currently Darwin is waiting to get a date for his procedure so he can resume his training

program - see you at the 25th Century Run Darwin!!

History Corner

• May 26th 1938 The Beginnings of Porsche !

Early sketch by Hitler Opening of the new VW Factory

The history of the Beetle goes back to Germany before World War 2, the economy was poor and most auto manufacturers were building large expensive cars. There was a strong requirement for a cheap car that was affordable to the average German. Ferdinand Porsche

had previously worked on some other small cars for Zündapp and NSU that used many elements later to be included in the Beetle. The Type 32 prototype NSU of 1934 was an air-cooled rear engined four cylinder horizontally opposed powered car that used torsion bar

suspension and featured beetle-like styling, there were also some other cars that used this innovative technology around this time as it was considered modern design. The idea of a car for the people appealed to the young Adolf Hitler who himself could not drive, but was a

car fanatic. Hitler was apparently influenced by the achievements of Henry Ford and his production lines - reading Ford's biography while in prison during 1923.

On the 26 May 1938, Hitler ceremoniously laid the cornerstone of the new factory, a huge

event witnessed by an estimated 70,000 people and 150 reporters, all controlled by the

Nazi propaganda machine. It was here that Hitler declared that the model would be known as the 'KdF-Wagen' or 'Strength through joy' wagen and the surrounding town that was built to support the factory would be known as the 'KdF-Stadt'. Hitler also introduced a

savings scheme where the public could collect stamps that would eventually pay for the car.

From May 1938, some more pre-production cars were built and named the VW38 series.

The bodies of these cars were still built by the Reutter coachbuilding company at an average of 2 bodies a week. Click to view photos of the 6th VW38 car, now restored.

Full Production was to start in September 1939 - which unfortunately turned out to be the same month that World War Two was declared. With the money diverted to the Nazi war effort, none of the thousands who had collected their stamps ever received their beetle

From the Peoples Car to the Car for the well healed! _-the new 991

• The First Le Mans: May 26th 1923

May 26th & 27th, 1923 saw the first running of the Le Mans 24 hours, on the public roads around Le

Mans town. The original idea was for a three year event, with the winner being the car that could go the

furthest distance over three consecutive races. This plan was abandoned in 1928 and the Le Mans 24

hours winners were declared for each year depending on who covered the furthest distance in the 24

hours. The early races were dominated by British, French, and Italian drivers, teams, and cars, with

Bentley, Alfa Romeo and Bugatti being the prominent marques.

By the late 1930’s innovations in car design began appearing at the Le Mans 24 hours circuit, with

Bugatti and Alfa Romeo running aerodynamic bodywork, enabling them to reach faster speeds down the

Mulsanne straight. In 1936 the race had to be cancelled due to strikes in France. With the outbreak of

World War II in late 1939, the Le Mans 24hrs race went on a ten year break.

The Bentley Speed was dominant for the formative years of Le Mans from 1923 to 1930 winning the

trophy 5 times in 8 years with Porsche also dominating from 1975 to 1987 winning all but 2 races

The fastest lap of Le Mans was 407 km/h ( 203 mph)r by Roger Dorchy in a WM P88 Peugot in 1988!

1930 4 Woolf BARNATO (GBR) / Glen KIDSTON (GBR) Bentley Speed 6

1929 1 Woolf BARNATO (GBR) / Tim BIRKIN (GBR) Bentley Speed 6

1928 4 Woolf BARNATO (GBR) / Bernard RUBIN (GBR) Bentley 4.4

1927 3 John BENJAFIELD (GBR) / Sammy DAVIS (GBR) Bentley 3-litre Sport

1926 6 Robert BLOCH (FRA) / Andre ROSSIGNOL (FRA) La Lorraine-Dietrich B3-6

1925 5 Gerard de COURCELLES (FRA) / Andre ROSSIGNOL (FRA) La Lorraine-Dietrich B3-6

1924 8 Frank CLEMENT (GBR) / John DUFF (GBR) Bentley 3-litre Sport

1923 9 Andre LAGACHE (FRA) / Rene LEONARD (FRA) Chenard &

Previous winners of Le Mans

Le Mans was made more famous by the 1971 film, Le Mans with Steve McQueen driving a Porsche 917K

Joke Corner

New Breakthrough in airport security

TEL AVIV, Israel - The Israelis are developing an airport security device that eliminates the

privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners. It's an armoured booth you step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive

device you may have on your person. Israel sees this as a win-win situation for everyone, with none of this crap about racial

profiling. It will also eliminate the costs of long and expensive trials.

You're in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter, an announcement:

"Attention to all standby passengers, El Al is pleased to announce a seat available on flight 670 to London. Shalom!"

Happy and Sad

A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology and explaining the phenomenon of "mixed emotions". The husband turned to his wife and said, "Honey, that is a bunch of crap. I bet you can't tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time. She said: "Out of all your friends, you have the biggest dick."

Druid’s Boobs Corner

Recognize the nationality?

On On

Smiley