Charity&ChildrenAnd now abides faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. Baptist Children’s Homes of North Carolina

132/8

Cook family shares blessing of being foster family. (Page 6) New videos ideal for worship services. (Page 7)

9/19

For Tara Sessoms, being good is only a starting place. Being good is never enough when you can do better ––

when you can become the best.“I knew that Baptist Children’s Homes (BCH) was right

for me when Dr. Blackwell (BCH’s president/CEO) told me that he wanted my best,” the new intellectual and develop-mental disabilities ministry director recalls. “I don’t like the word good. Good is good. I believe in being my best. I believe God deserves my best.”From its beginning in 2000, BCH has placed a priority

on providing only the finest homes and the best care for adults with special needs. The ministry provides residentialservices –– a home –– to adults with intellectual and develop-mental disabilities (IDD) in six locations with nine facilitiesacross North Carolina.The IDD program supports special needs adults in

pursuing their individual goals and dreams while providing the assistance necessary for them to live in a supportive, Chris-

tian environment. The homes are single gender, six bed homes and are alcohol and smoke free environments. They are places where residents aresafe, can relax and feel comfortable. The environ-ment promotes healthy and positive relationshipsbetween housemates and promotes maximum independence, individual growth and inclusion in the community.“It is our responsibility to create an optimal

life experience for each resident,” Sessoms says. “If I expect, or any of our team expects, the best

in our lives, then each person in the IDD program should be able to experience the best life.”

(Continued on page 3.)

Ministry strengthensoverall service tospecial needs adults___________________________________________________________________

By Jim Edminson, Editor

Listen to BCH’s new podcast!The “Balancing Family and Work” series is available now.

Sessoms

Charity & Children – Baptist Children’s Homes of North Carolina, Inc., 204 Idol St., PO Box 338, Thomasville, NC 27361-0338. Michael C. Blackwell, publisher; Jim Edminson, editor (wjedminson@bchfamily.org); Blake Ragsdale, managing editor (jbragsdale@ bchfamily.org); Marcia Housand, account clerk. Charity & Children (ISSN 0009-1723-09 USPS 100-460) is published 11 times a year for friends and supporters of Baptist Children’s Homes. It is printed at Triangle Web Printing, Durham, NC and mailed by Excalibur,Winston-Salem, NC. Circulation: 62,000 seven times a year, 30,000 four times a year. Periodicals postage paid at Thomasville, NC, and at additional mailing offices. For free subscription or to be removed from the mailing list or make address correction orchange, use the above address and write to Attn: Circulation Manager, send an email to address@bchfamily.org or call at 336-474-1209. Subscribe online at bchfamily.org/charityandchildren. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Charity & Children, PO Box 338, Thomasville, NC 27361-0338.

Mission: sharing hope . . . changing lives

Vision: To provide the highest quality

of Christian services to children, adults

and families in a caring culture of

measurable excellence

Subscribe family and friends to C&C at www.bchfamily.org/subscribe.2 9/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8

One of the deepest desires of a parent is to give a legacy of heartfelt values to his

or her child. To pass along convictions and princi-ples which have become a part of us through ourexperience is not only our responsibility butdemonstrates deep love for our offspring.How do we transmit our values?Taking a few common-sense steps will go

a long way toward imparting an understanding of what values are important to you, why they are important, and why you want your child toembrace those values which have meaning to you.

1. First, treat your child with respect in everysituation, especially when sharing your beliefs.Much of what you wish to convey to your

child will be accepted or rejected based merely on its presentation. If you treat your child fairlyand with dignity, you’re creating an open envi-ronment in which the child will feel free to listenand speak. If a child feels you’re talking down tohim, he may block the message. Sometimes adultsforget children need to feel respected and thattheir fragile feelings need protecting. Childrencrave value, worth and dignity.

2. Second, listen to your child.Truly hear what your child is saying or asking

as related to the values you are sharing. Manytimes, we as adults assume our words are crystalclear to children and the way we say things hasthe same meaning to our child as it does to us.Avoid “pat” answers. Your first response may

be easiest, but bite your tongue and think moredeeply about the question. Your child will know if you are simply repeating platitudes to her with-out concern for really hearing her.Children who ask “Why?” aren’t just trying

to drive us crazy. They really want to know whatmakes things work and why we hold the values we do and why it is important that they holdthem, too. It takes time and effort to truly listen,but the results are worth it.

3. Third, be aware that you are an example.There is no question that you are an example:

the question is what kind of example are you? Ifyour actions are not consistent with your words,there is slim chance your “lecture” will mean anything to its audience. Your life-conduct, speech, actions –– form

the basis for your witness to your child. The oldsaying is true: “If a child lives with criticism, hewill criticize.” What your child observes in you is what he internalizes, far sooner and more permanently than anything you say to him. Make sure your life speaks the values you want to impart to your children. Be an authentic modelfor your child to emulate. Your values will beginto be reflected in the actions of your child.

4. Fourth, encourage and affirm.When your child makes progress in behavior

and demonstrates your values, praise him lavishly,but sincerely. Encouragement helps your childembrace your values, and gives him vital messagesabout esteem, confidence and courage. The wayhe feels about himself is determined in greatmeasure by his perception of how you feel abouthim. Success begets success. Encouraging andsupporting your child does wonders in movinghim along toward an acceptance of those valueswhich will have great meaning in his life.

5. Fifth, love your child unconditionally andmake sure she knows it.This is the most important ingredient in

building a lasting relationship of trust and acceptance. Children are remarkably intuitive.They can sense and feel if you’re authentic.They know if things aren’t the way you say they are. Mistakes may be made but love forgives all. You won’t always like your child’s actions, but you can always love your child.Children may not always

remember the gifts you give them but they will remember

the fact that you’ve loved them.Respect your child.Listen to your child.Be an example for your child.Encourage and affirm your child.Love your child.If you follow these common-sense guidelines,

not only will your find that you are building a loving, strong relationship but you are buildinga foundation for your values to outlive you in the lives of your descendants.Transmitting

values must be learned over an extendedtime. The resultis a lifetime rela-tionship betweenloving parent and loving child.

[ MY THOUGHTS }

Transmitting values to children: Five tips for building relationship _____________________________________________________________________________________________________

ByMichael C. Blackwell, President/CEO

Read Baptist Children’s Homes’ stories at www.bchblog.org. 39/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8

Team members from North Car-olina Baptist Aging Ministry

(NCBAM) recently had the privilegeof meeting and hearing the author ofThe Heart of The Caregiver –– MaryTutterow. Her presentation gave a

greater appre-ciation for herand herbook’s teach-ings. It wasmy privilegeto walk asmall groupof caregivers

through the book and saw first-handhow Tutterow’s use of scripture andher personal experiences challengedthe group and served as a source ofencouragement as they comparedtheir personal ups and downs as care-givers.Kay, a participant who cares for her

husband, offered some insightfulfeedback: “The class helped me todetermine to depend more on God. The scrip-tures reminded me that I am not alone in mydaily duties as a caregiver. The videos where wecould see Mary and know she was a real person,going through what she wrote about, and hear-ing her testify about how God helped her, res-onated and encouraged me. Our leader, led usthrough the discussions and scriptures like ashepherd. This class helped me feel better aboutmyself. I walked away encouraged knowing Godis always and forever going to be there. I amnever alone.”

The Heart of The Caregiver is a great place foranyone serving as a caregiver to find help. The in-

troduction states: “Our goal is transformation ––from overwhelmed to overjoyed.”The caregivers I led through the study

emerged with a refreshed heart, a more positiveattitude, revitalized strength, and new hope! Ifyou are a caregiver who would benefit from thisstudy or if you know of someone who is a care-giver and needs encouraging, find or form agroup and begin the transformation for your sakeand for the good of your care recipient.If you would like to learn more about trans-

formation groups, contact NCBAM’s RobertLeonard by emailing releonard@bchfamily.org.To receive a free copy of “Ten Truths of Trans-

formation,” contact NCBAM at877-506-2226.______________________The mission of NCBAM is to

provide “help for the journey” toindividuals 65+ in ways that helpthem maintain their independ-ence and enjoy quality of life.NCBAM’s Call Center pro-

vides information and referrals to callers and makes connectionswith volunteers from Baptist

churches, other denomina-tions, and civicgroups.NCBAM’sregional directorsservethroughoutthe state ––engagingwith localchurches to increaseawareness of the needs of frail agingadults and theministry oppor-tunities availableto churches inmeeting thoseneeds.Special atten-

tion is given to support and encourage care-givers.

[ NORTH CAROLINA BAPTIST AGING MINISTRY }

Caregivers find encouragement through resources_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By Robert Leonard, South Central Regional Director, NCBAM

Left to right, Joann Baker, Joanne Nichols and Kay Beamon recently completedthe nine-week Bible study /support group session entitled: The Heart of theCaregiver led by NCBAM regional director Robert Leonard.

(Continued on from page 1.)Tara Sessoms first attended church as a child

with her grandmother. It was something shenever had to be coaxed into doing.“I loved church when I was little,” Sessoms

says. “It was the place where I felt peace. It waswhere I belonged.”As she grew older, that love never waned.

Yielding her life to Christ was natural and servingHim became her calling. After attending commu-nity college, she transferred to a Christian collegeand studied Christian education. Her outgoingpersonality was affirmed when she was elected thecollege’s first female student body president. Herleadership skills were honed when asked by thefemale students to challenge the school’s femaledress code.

“My constant prayer was for wisdom,” she asserts. “No one wanted to challenge beliefs ––the female students only wanted a few considera-tions. I navigated things slowly and ultimatelyrules were changed. I learned that God can workin mighty ways. It is amazing to see how Hebrings the right people to the right place at theright time.”Her passion for the church also fueled success-

ful ventures into youth ministry. It was no sur-prise that after graduation she became a socialworker at a children’s home.Graduate programs, certifications and experi-

ences working with various populations includingyouth, military families, mental health clients, andspecial needs groups brought Sessoms to this newplace of service –– BCH’s director of the intellec-

tual and developmental disabilities ministry.“The IDD program’s foundation is strong,”

Sessoms says. “I am committed to building on that foundation and helping the IDD teamtake this ministry to new heights, strengtheningour overall service to special needs adults. We are taking what we have in place and making it extraordinary.”Sessoms describes herself as a highly

independent, fun-loving person who loves the Lord and people. She says she is at her bestwhen she is creating, stirring the waters of newpossibilities, and inspiring others to join her.To learn more about IDD or discover ways

you can help, visit www.hereismyhome.org or contact Sessoms at tsessoms@bchfamily.com.

New ministry director focuses on doing the extraordinary_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

On Sunday, August 11, the girls from CampDuncan joined me in sharing the “BCH

Story” at Rocky Hock Baptist Church. It was a wonderful day! What made it wonderful? Thecourage of the girls to share and the amazing waythe people of Rocky Hock embraced the girls andthe many ministries we provide. When I sharedthat we had touched more than 94,000 lives lastyear, there was an audible gasp of surprise that wewere caring for so many in need. When they heardthe good news that 669 had made professions offaith in the last five years, they clapped with joyand celebration –– praising God for what He is doing in the lives of the boys and girls He entrusted to us.I began to walk through our many ministries

sharing how each ministry is impacting those inneed. I shared a story of a single mom receivinghelp at our Family Care home in Ahoskie –– amom who had broken the bonds of poverty andabuse, graduated from Chowan University, and isnow teaching. The story touched them in a specialway because they had personally been a part ofhelping her.The story of four children coming from an

opioid addiction situation grabbed their hearts. It was in the middle of the night when the chil-dren arrived on our campus. They were dirty, hungry and frightened. They had been through so much trauma. The houseparents had peanutbutter and jelly sandwiches and milk on the tablewhen they walked in the cottage. After eating,they were shown their bed rooms which was a new experience for these children. They hadbeen sleeping on the floor. The houseparents patted backs and helped the children get to sleep. Later in the early morning hours, the housemother walked in to check on the children to findone of the little boys asleep with his blanket onthe floor. His housemother scooped him up andplaced him back on the bed and began to pat hisback until he was once again asleep. As I shared,

there were tears being shed all over the congrega-tion as they heard the hurt of these boys and girls.More importantly, there was joy and celebration as they heard of the transformation taking place in the lives of these precious children. In Mark 10:13 -16, Jesus demonstrates how

important children are and the importance ofbeing present in the moment. In the final verse,Jesus picks the children up in His arms, places his hands on them, and blesses them. As I looked across the congregation, I was so

grateful that they too understood God’s calling on their hearts to care for the least of these, thecalling to bear each other’s burdens. The Camp Duncan girls joined me on the plat-

form and what followed was amazing. Their voicesresounded throughout the congregation as theypraised God in song. Following their beautiful andincredibly inspiring music, one of the girls madeher way to the podium to share her testimony. Shewas born in Russia. When she was a very youngchild, her mother died in a fire. Her father was notable to care for her and she was placed in an orphanage. She was adopted by a family in NorthCarolina. She was confused and struggled to adjust to her new family and a totally different culture. As it usually does, it took a while for herto begin to feel she was safe and cared for ––then her life seemed to fall apart all overagain when her parents decided to divorce.She was angry, confused and hurting. She began to act out by being dishonest,stealing and displaying an attitude of “I don’t care.” She was actually cryingout for help the only way she knew how. The congregation listened intently as

she shared her story. She came to CampDuncan and God has used this ministryto transform her heart and her life. She shared how God was repairing herrelationships with her family. She sharedher faith walk and how much she hasgrown in her faith. As I looked across thecongregation, I realized I probably shouldstart bringing a load of tissues to theseservices. It was evident God was mov-ing among His people. Once again, I felt such gratitude that they under-stood God’s calling on their heartsto care for the least of these and to carry each other’s burdens. As she finished sharing her story,the congregation erupted in applause for her courage toshare and in celebration of theamazing transformation thathas taken place in her life.This is not an unusual

reception as we share the “BCH Story” withchurches and groups across

our state. We are so very grateful for every church,Sunday School class, and individual that makesthis ministry possible. Every day gratitude floodsmy heart as you demonstrate your understandingof God’s calling on your heart to care for the leastof these and bear one another’s burdens.A friend recently shared with me how he enjoys

his visit with me each month. I guess I looked alittle perplexed. He shared when he gets Charity& Children he feels that I have visited with him.So as I end my visit with you this month, I endwith this –– THANK YOU! You are an amazingblessing!Please call me at 336-689-4442 if I can assist

you in any way as you continue to prayerfullyinvest in the lives of the least of these.

There are two ways you can help now!Bills are now pouring in for back to school

expenses, which is a tremendous challenge. It isnot too late to give and help with this enormous financial responsibility.If you have not had a speaker in your church

you are missing an opportunity to bless and to be blessed. Call now to

schedule a speaker.

4 9/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8 Leave a legacy through planned giving. Visit www.bchlegacy.org.

[ WORTHWHILE INVESTMENTS }

Children’s lives are transformed as you reach out_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By Brenda B. Gray, Executive Vice President, Development & Communications

Brenda Gray serves BCH as the executive vicepresident, development & communications anddirects all fund-raising/friend-raising activities for the state-wide services.

Videos, slides & other resources at www.bchoffering.org 59/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8

[ A N N U A L O F F E R I N G 2 0 1 9 }

The Cooks’ house looks different today as does the family that lives in it.

The home of Roger and Shanell, along with seventeen-year-old son Jackson, used to containboth a living room and a separate sitting room.Not long ago, Roger and his son took hammer and nail to the sitting room transforming it intoanother bedroom –– big enough for two childrenif the need arises.For sixteen years of Jackson’s life, there were

three members of the Cook household. Now, therehave been as many as eight. Their household, andtheir lives, completely changed in 2018 when theCooks became a licensed foster family throughBaptist Children’s Homes (BCH).Jackson recently shared his one regret about

his family’s new dynamic: “I wish we’d done thissooner.”“I always tear up when I think about him saying

that,” says Shanell.Roger and Shanell wanted to have more

children after Jackson was born, but were unable.After Roger successfully battled esophageal cancerin 2017, the Cooksbegan evaluatingwhat they saw as an opportunity for their family.“Roger’s battle

was a long journey,but God is good,”Shanell proclaims.“We always wantedfour children, andwe saw this as God giving us a second chance.“We felt the need

to foster with theintent to adopt.”Shanell learned

of BCH’s familyfoster care programas she was chattingwith BCH staffmembers who bankwhere she is employed. She and Roger agreed thatthey wanted to learn more about fostering throughBCH and what it would look like for their family.Danetta Christmas, director of Foster Care atBCH’s Mills Home in Thomasville, was at theirhouse the following evening.Danetta’s role is to train and license families as

well as supervise case management staff memberswho provide ongoing support to those families.

Danetta’s team works with families and churcheslocated in counties within the Mills Home servicearea. BCH has family foster care offices and staffthroughout North Carolina.The Cooks

began their train-ing in September2017 and were licensed in early 2018.“The calls

immediatelystarted comingin,” Shanell saysregarding chil-dren in need of fostering. Thecouple includedJackson in the decision-making process as theyprayed and discussed the children who could potentially come into their home.“This wasn’t just about myself and Roger,

but about Jackson,” Shanell explains. “It needed to be the right fit for everyone.”

That “right fit”turned out to be a timidseven-year-old girlnamedMakayla.“We

first met her the week ofValentine’sDay and fell in lovewith her immediately,”Shanellbeams.“Within ten days, she was livingwith us.”

Makayla had suffered a traumatic family historythat left a number of emotional scars which theCooks recognized immediately.“She was so shy. She had no self-esteem and

no confidence. It took a while to build it up,”Roger says.As the weeks and months passed, Makayla began

to see that the Cooks genuinely cared about her.“She completely blossomed,” Roger continues.

“She is very bright, energetic and talkative.She’s the little sparkplugto our family.”A little more than

a year after they beganfostering her, the adop-tion became official.Makayla became a perma-nent member of the Cookfamily on April 26, 2019.The larger family theCooks always dreamt

of was now reality. How-ever, as theyfosteredMakayla andcontinuedworking withBCH, thecouple beganseeing fostercare throughanother filter.“Through

Danetta’straining and God workingthrough her, we have seenit’s not all about adoptionanymore,” Shanell reveals.“Fostering is about

doing God’s work,”Roger adds. “This may be the only chance a childgets to see a Christianfamily. No matter howlong we have that child,it’s an opportunity.”That opportunity has presented itself to

the Cooks multiple times. In a year and a half,they have fostered seven children ranging fromseven months to nine years old.Makayla and the other children attend church

and children’s activities which included VacationBible School this past summer. It was at VBSthat the Cooks’ newly-adopted daughter andtwo boys they foster accepted Christ as Savior.“It was the greatest belated birthday gift!”

exclaims Shanell, who celebrated a birthday that same week.The family continues to look expectantly

towards God, trusting Him to continue fillingthe extra room they have built. They are com-pletely committed to fostering through BaptistChildren’s Homes.“Baptist Children’s Homes is a Godly,

Christian organization, and I encourage peopleto foster through them,” shares Shanell. “Theyoffer more resources, more help and more hopethan anywhere else you’re going to go.”“We built the extra room and God’s filled it,”

Roger says. “It’s God’s timing and God’s plan.We just have to be willing to answer the callwhen He makes it.”

Learn more about fostering through BCH at www.bchfostercare.org 9/19 – Charity & Children – 132/89/19 – Charity & Children – 132/8

[ FAMILY FOSTER CARE }

Cook family “doing God’s work”as they foster through BCH__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By Blake Ragsdale, Managing EditorBaptist Children’s Homes (BCH) offers four new videos

as a part of its Annual Offering promotional materials.The video, Hope & Future, is named for this year’s offer-

ing theme and tells the story of two homeless brothers who found hope at BCH. The second is a one-minute clipentitled Ciara’s Story featuring the journey of the BCH resident and high school valedictorian. The last two areFamily Foster Care videos.The foster care video shorts share the story of the Cook

family (see article on page 6). There is a three-minute versionand a one-minute promotional version.“Creating foster care videos that churches can share

with their congregations was a priority this year,” said BlakeRagsdale, BCH director of communications and producerof the videos. “I have pastors who are excited about whatGod is doing through their foster care partnership withBCH ask me when we could provide a video. God providedthe right story at the right time through the Cook family.They have been gracious in allowing their journey to beshared.”The three-minute version delves deeper into the family’s

story, while the one-minute promo version is the perfectlength for a church to use as part of worship.“Whether it’s before the service begins, during a mission

moment, or while the offering is being collected, we offer a version that is inspirational but did not demand too muchtime,” Ragsdale explained.The DVDs of the videos, along with other Annual

Offering materials including envelopes, bulletin inserts and posters, are mailed to North Carolina Baptist churchesand are directed to the pastor’s attention.Digital versions of each video can also be downloaded

immediately online through BCH’s offering website,www.bchoffering.org and www.vimeo.com/bchfamily.“More churches are using presentation software, such

as ProPresenter and MediaShout, to show slides and videos during worship,” Ragsdale said. “Our goal is tomake it easy for everyone, regardless of the technologybeing utilized, to share the BCH story.”

New videos includefoster care story____________________________________________________________________

The Cooks are a foster care family through Baptist Children’s Homes (BCH). Roger and Shanell were trained and licensed by BCH foster care staffwho help navigate the placement of children with foster care families and provide ongoing support. Since becoming licensed in early 2018, the Cooks

have fostered seven children ranging from seven months to nine years old. The first child they fostered, Makayla, was able to be adopted bythe Cooks in April 2019. Left to right, Shanell, Jackson, Makayla, and Roger Cook. If you would like to become a foster care family or if your

church is interested in starting its own foster care ministry, visit www.bchfostercare.org or call 800-476-3669.

Seventeen-year-old Jackson Cook gives his adopted sister Makayla, age 8,a piggy back ride. Jackson shared with his parents that his only regret about

becoming a foster care family is he wished they had done it sooner.

“Fostering is aboutdoing God’s work. Thismay be the only chancea child gets to see aChristian family.”

–– Roger Cook, Foster Parent

What is family foster care?By becoming a trained and licensed foster carefamily through Baptist Children’s Homes (BCH),you provide family living care for a child over a planned period when his/her family or legal custodian cannot provide care.

Who are the children?Foster children can be any child in NC, ranging in age from infancy to 18 years old, who entersthe foster care system. Each child has a uniquebackground and specific experiences and needs.Many come from situations of abuse and neglectand do not possess a healthy self-esteem. Fosterchildren need a family atmosphere, a place wherethey can belong, and they need to be loved.

Can we adopt the children?Possibly. The goal of foster care is reunificationwith the biological parents, however, if it is

determined that reunification is not possible,adoption can become an option for permanency.Through our work with the child welfare systemand in partnership with Christian Adoption Serv-ices (A licensed adoption agency in NC) adoptionservices can be provided seamlessly.

How can my church begin a foster care ministry?BCH’s foster care staff will partner with yourchurch to provide trainings to equip and licensecouples who feel called to become foster parents.We also help churches learn how they can providesupport and community for these couples and the children who come into their families. The church’s role is vital.

We’re here to answer questions. Go online to bchfostercare.org or call 800-476-3669.

Family Foster Care in a flash!

VIDEO LINKSWatch the new family foster care video featuring the Cooks’ story atwww.vimeo.com/bchfamily/fostercare or scan the QR code.

Experience Ciara’s one-minutestory by scanning the QR codeor visit www.vimeo.com/bchfamily/ciara.

Download more videos atbchoffering.org.

8 9/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8 Look for @bchfamily to find and follow us on social media.

Hope in Style made its biggest impact to dateon the lives of the children living at Mills

Home in Thomasville. The children’s fashionshow and silent auction brought in more than$118,000 before expenses.“Even though it is before expenses, this num-

ber exceeds the past eight Hope In Style events,”said Baptist Children’s Homes’ Karen Slate, whoorganizes the event with the help of a volunteercommittee and sponsors including lead sponsorsBelk in Greensboro and Vanguard Ministries.Children go shopping with volunteers to pick

out new school outfits courtesy of Belk. At theevent, boys and girls model their clothing on therunway to the applause of attendees.“You could see the children’s confidence and

smiles on full display,” Slate said. “Because ofHope in Style supporters, they know that they arevalued and loved.”Tanya Rivera, news anchor at Channel 2 in

Greensboro, returned as this year’s emcee. Musi-cal entertainment was provided by Eve HubbardStrings Quartet and Mills Home pastor Dr.Randy Stewart.

The ninth annual Hope in Style children’s fashion show and silent auction was held onSaturday, August 17 at the Greensboro Country Club. Above, residents from Mills Home,

Baptist Children’s Homes’ campus in Thomasville, strike a pose in their new back-to-schooloutfits courtesy of Belk in Greensboro. Middle left, guests take a moment to photograph a“selfie” before sitting down to lunch. Middle, entertainment was provided by Eve Hubbard

Strings Quartet. Right, WFMY News 2 anchor Tanya Rivera, a two time Emmy Award winner,returned to emcee the event. Bottom, left to right, attendees are greeted by Murphy, a very

social golden doodle who was donated to this year’s silent auction. In a first, twin sisters take tothe Hope in Style runway showcasing their matching back-to-school clothes. Guests arrive at

the Greensboro Country Club and immediately begin thinking about their bids for the silentauction. Items, including furniture, sports memorabilia and trips, were donated for the event.

[ HOPE IN STYLE 2019 }

Back-to-school fundraiser scores best marks yet_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By Blake Ragsdale, Managing Editor

In Memoriam –– Our dearlybeloved who passed since last August: Helen (Mrs. Thurston) Bow-man, 1961-1988 staff; Jake Bow-man, 1954-1960; Doris Fay BurgessGrissom, 1950-1955; William“Buddy” Cole, 1955-1959; RebeccaDeal Kirkpatrick, 1962-1969; GaryFisher, 1991-1999 staff; Brenda JoyFoster Brown, 1964-1969; BarbaraHoffman Brewer, 1946-1958;Thomas B. “Tommy” Jones, 1946-1959; Allen A. Lambert, 1958-1968;Rev. James M. Lambert, 1966-1973;Jack Ledbetter, 1942-1955; ByrumMauney, 1936-1943; Don McCar-son, 1943-1954; Louise PhelpsDaniels, 1925-1935; Phyllis PattonMulligan, 1949-1956; Marie PhillipsJohnson, 1947-1957; Nathan Walls,1954-1964; Pamela Ziglar Johnson,1963-1970; Clotine Price Alford,1944-1954; Sharon Ziglar Creasman,1963-1974; Mary Alice (Mrs. Gene)Wilson, 1980s staff. All but the lastthree were mentioned in previous issues of Charity & Children. President Sharon DeHart Stiles

sends her love and appreciation to everyone who helped to makeour Homecoming a success thisyear. She also thanks the ones thatdonated items for the auction sale.She says, “We had many interestingthings donated and everyone didsuch a good job in selecting items of suitable value. One of the mostinteresting auction items that wehad was a $750 stay in Alaska givenby Pat Baucom. I also send deep appreciation to all the people whoenthusiastically participated in thebidding on those wonderful items.Beyond the Silent Auction, we hopethat we had enough activities toprovide you with fun and entertain-ment. We are, however, always look-ing for new ideas to help us createan even more exciting Homecomingschedule that will lure a few morealumni back to the homeplace. Feelfree to contact me to share yoursuggestions for our next year. Emailor call me! My e-mail address issharondstiles51@ yahoo.com and myphone number is 704-685-2443.” As usual, many hard working

alumni, spouses and friends arrived

on campus on Thursday, August 1,to begin the rigorous chores thatmake Homecoming such a success.They unpacked and displayed important items for sale, set up thetables for the Silent Auction, anddecorated the gym. The work wascontinued on Friday and ended witha delicious meal cooked by Jane andDanny Brown with all their crew ofworkers. They fed 75 people thatevening. On Saturday morning,many folks met for breakfast andthen rushed to the campus to startregistration and take in the SilentAuction items for display. There wasa wonderful display of very usefulitems and folks had great fun out-bidding each other. That event takesquite a few attendants to make it work efficiently but their effortswere well rewarded with the totalprofit being $2,912.50. On Satur-day evening, Jane and the cookingcrew prepared the food and served126 more people. Helping with thatbig task were Helen Helms Johns,Mike and Taylor Cooper, Sana Moore,Randy Bass, Danny and Renita Bryant,Linda Rochelle, and John Wagner. SixMills Home (MH) youngsters serveddrinks and desserts. Folks who jumped in to help with

registration, the Silent Auction, andother preparations for the weekendwere Flora Hicks Patton and hubbyGrady, Bucky and Angie Clark, Ce-celia Townsend Wilkerson and Mark,Jackie Elliott Walker, Jimmy andLinda Rochelle, Pete and JudyKnight, Rusty Bunker, Sylvia andLester Smith, Lisa Carter Lancasterand Ron, Martha Berndt Fisher andher daughter, Randy and DianeStewart, Joe Knight and his band,Linda and Pat Jolly, Sharon DeHartStiles, Evelyn Kirby Burns anddaughter Sherrie, Keith Campbelland Lexi Palmer Churchill, JuanitaWhite Masservey, Julie Maiden Longand Ron, Margaret Powell Arm-strong, Mike Clay, Susan MeeksWoods and two MH residents attended the Mitchell Museum. Staff members from Mills Home

who helped with serving food onSunday were Linda Taylor, ReginaKeener, Larry Morris, MelindaHelsabeck, Patricia Carroll, Courtney

Walker, Dana Hartman, AndreaWalker, John Mullen, Andy Snovak,Krystal Saunders, Danetta Christ-mas, Mark Blalock and Rae Francis. Alumni Council members gave

personal donations of snacks anddrinks to raise additional money at a concession stand. Cecelia Wilker-son arranged the after dinner “HoeDown” which featured “LJ” the “DJ”and Betty McDade. Alumni and cur-rent MH youngsters eagerly joinedin all the features of that fun event. For most alumni, the Sunday

morning worship service is the mainevent for the weekend and we cer-tainly enjoyed this one. The alumnichoir, led by Sharon DeHart Stiles,awakened our spirits with a rousingrendition of “He Lives.” They wereaccompanied by the amazing key-board skills of Rev. Randy and DianeStewart. The congregation seemeddelighted to take part in the singingof “Love Lifted Me.” We delightedalso to hear two brief but very spe-cial messages from Dyani Reynolds(Sakara) and Wallace Maultsby ––one of the youngest alumni and oneof the “more experienced.” Bothgave credit for the happiness andsuccesses of their lives to the greatadvantages MH life provided them.Dr. Michael Blackwell also providedinspirational words for the day before dismissing us. Shirley Topping Maxwell summed

up a good portion of Sunday whenshe wrote to her friends on Face-book: “Homecoming 2019 was all I thought it would be. The churchservice touched my heart and mademe so thankful. I loved the wonder-ful singing of the alumni choir, andinspirational words from Dyani andWallace. Dr. Blackwell, such a fineexample for everyone, closed theservice with his own inspirationalwords, blessing and invitation tolunch at the gym. I always love hear-ing him end with the words, ‘We’llkeep the lights on for you.’ Thefood was the best! The chicken wasso tender and delicious as were thebarbecue and slaw. The ice creamwas so delicious, too! The crowdwas so happy! And my MH brothersand sisters, as always, loving and

kind and awesome. Many traveledfar and wide to come home for thisjoyous occasion –– very importantwere my family and friend, Marie,who came to be with me and enjoyall this. I thank Carol, Kenneth andRicky for caring enough about meto be there. God bless you all.”Shirley also expressed apprecia-

tion for the MH staff for makingthe campus so beautiful and for the Alumni Council’s dedication toserving the association and makingHomecoming a meaningful event.Sandy Penley asks that we please

keep Joey Lambert in our prayersand praise the Lord that Joey madeit to Homecoming. Lib Johnsonsends her appreciation for the kindthoughtful “get well” wishes. Timmy Tilley, who was at MH

from ‘73 until ‘77 in the SimmonsCottage and later at Downing withthe Crooks and Juanita Hutchinson,made connection recently with fel-low alumni on Facebook. Timmycommented on the term “OrphanLove” –– a closing used by manyalumni when writing on Facebookor on the website. About thatphrase he wrote: “I love that phrase!Orphan love is a very special, deepand unconditional love. When I wasat MH, I was not a very good orlovable kid. But I have experiencedthat kind of love. And now MH hasonce again taken me in as an adultby accepting me into this group.”He also shared the personal infor-mation that he had been marriedmore than once and is the father ofnine children. When Colleen HicksKearns urged him to stay active with our Facebook group and try to attend this year’s Homecoming,he said he was unable to attend thisyear on short notice, but hoped to return next year. After several exchanges, Timmy wrote: “Thankyou so much. Nothing would makeme happier than to be reconnectedto the only home and family I ever

had.”

Lib Johnson was a resident of MillsHome from 1946 to 1957. Johnsonbegan writing the Mills Home alumnicolumn in 1992.

[ MILLS HOME ALUMNI COLUMN }

Homecoming draws alumni from far and wide ––Time spent reconnecting and sharing memories_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By Lib Smathers Johnson (336) 299-7412 libsjohnson@triad.rr.com

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/millshomealumni 99/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8

10 9/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8 Learn how BCH helps children and families at www.bchfamily.org/help

Can we help? Many ministries beating with one heart.1. Western Area Family Services

Linda Morgan, Lead Dir., 828-627-9254

2. Central Area Family Services Regina Keener, Dir., 336-474-1200

3. Eastern Area Family Services Brian Baltzell, Dir., 252-522-0811 www.kennedyhome.org

4. Odum Home Kathy Locklear, Res. Mgr., 910-521-3433www.odumhome.org

5. Oak Ranch/Family CareLynn Garner, Dir., 336-474-1240

6. Cameron Boys Camp Drew Scott, Dir. , 910-245-4034 www.cameronboyscamp.org

7. Camp Duncan for Girls Paul Daley, Dir., 910-944-3077 www.campduncanNC.org

8. Weekday EducationBrooke Child, Dir., 336-474-1201

9. Tucker Greater Vision MinistrySara Becker, Mgr., 336-687.6384

10. Family Foster CareBob McCleary, 828-627-9254www.bchfostercare.org

11. HOMEBASE at W. Carolina UniversityJim Dean, Dir., 828-293-4660

12. Intellectual & Developmental DisabilitiesTara Sessoms, Dir., 336-474-1259www.hereismyhome.org

13. NC Baptist Aging MinistrySandy Gregory, Dir., 336-474-1221www.ncbam.org

14. Good Shepherd Children’s Homein GuatemalaKeith Henry, 336-474-1215

Making News Every Day Around the State

Guatemala MissionsOrphans find haven at new homeWestmoreland Family Children’s Home provides a new option for Guatemala orphans. Please give to the $100,000 matching gift challenge to build another home. Call Brenda Gray at 336-689-4442.

Intellectual/Developmental DisabilitiesHappiness Retreat is a treat Residents from Mercer Home in Sanford had a greattime at the 2019 Happiness Retreat at Camp Car-away hosted by the Baptist State Convention. High-lights included residents playing in handbell choir.

Children helping childrenLemonade stand blesses BroyhillLydia, Laura, Carrie, and Eva Grace Holland raised$540.35 from their lemonade and craft stand forBroyhill Home in Clyde. The funds will buy schoolsupplies. The girls have done this for four years.

Mills Home in ThomasvilleStudent helps BCH for projectAva Tharpe, who attends East Wilkes High School inRhonda, organized a golf tournament for her seniorproject. She raised more than $3,000 for MillsHome children to have a special outing.

Weekday Education in ThomasvilleCamp equals Summer funEven though school is out for summer, BCH’s five-star child care centers still provide a season of funand learning. Children experienced gem mining during a trip to Dan Nicholas Park in Salisbury.

Kennedy Home in KinstonChurch volunteers for a weekVolunteers from Oak Valley, a church plant of long-time BCH friends Scotts Hill Baptist in Wilmington,spent a week tackling projects, teaching cookingclasses, and leading a Bible study at Kennedy Home.

HOMEBASE at WCU in CullowheeStudents learn about resourcesHOMEBASE director Jim Dean gave a presentationto a group of incoming Western Carolina Universityfreshmen about the support and resources availableto them through HOMEBASE College Ministry.

Odum Home in PembrokeDeep Impact impacts BCHYouth from Holly Creek Baptist in Chatsworth, Ga., First Baptist in Bryson City, and Happy HomeBaptist Church in Nakina served at Odum Home asa part of Baptist on Mission’s Deep Impact 2019.

Tom H. Davis Runway for SuccessCollege visit stirs future planning High Point University hosted BCH’s boys and girls, in-cluding girls from Camp Duncan, above, for this year’sevent. The goal is to help children begin thinkingabout their future and their goals.

Indian Beach Cottage, here wecome! At the time of this writing,there are 12 alumni signed up forthe Beach Retreat on October 4, 5& 6. We hope to have at least 20.So, sign up now! Send an email tome to register. There will be enoughfood and fun for everyone! If you have a craft you want to

bring, bring it along. Last year manypeople painted rocks with messages.We just have a great time of fellow-ship, visiting each other, walking onthe beach, eating, and eating, andeating. The cost is only $30 a per-son. This covers two nights at thecottage and all your meals for theweekend. We do ask that you bringsnacks to share and some desserts.Those who registered by August 5,are: Debbie Caulder, Gary Caulder,Becky Thompson, John Thompson,Katie Parker, Debbie Lassiter, DavidLassiter, Mary Lee Etheridge Feige,Donna Duty, Dave Duty, Hugh Kirk-man, and Patsy Lovejoy. Send youremail today and sign up –– jthomp-son117@ec.rr.com. (I want to besure to have enough food.) Alice Sisk Russum recently wrote:

“My husband John and I moved lastyear around this same time to Mid-land, TX. The oil industry here is in a boom. He did not think he wasready for retirement, so accepted a position here. It is hot and dryand windy most of the time. I havenot thrived here. It is a long wayfrom family –– a 12-14 hour drive.So after a year here, John decided toretire. He has worked for Chevronfor 38 1/2 years. In that 38 years,we have moved 18 times. Needlessto say, I am ready to settle into onehome for a while. We will be mov-ing to Ozark, Missouri. We havebought a home there and look forward to living in the Ozarks.This will be our third time living in the area. We love being betweenBranson and Springfield, Missouri.There are lots of lakes and rivers.“I miss July Homecoming.

Due to all our travels and distantfamily, we have not been availableevery year. I am like Donna Duty, I enjoyed my time at Kennedy

Home (KH) growing up. I appreci-ate all the different chores andworking on the farm. Today, I like being clean and having a clean house. I met Jesus at KHand have continued our relationshipall these years. Could not have done life without the guidance ofthe Holy Spirit and Heavenly Fatherbeing so good to me and loving me.I am the apple of His eye. “I appreciate you, Mr. Thompson,

for keeping up this column and foryour faithfulness. My sister, DonaSisk, was at KH and graduated fromthere. She lives in Lakeside, CA. She is a cancer survivor and is doingwell. Buddy Sisk is my brother andlives in Titusville, Florida. He also is doing well and is married. Mynew address is 4319 N. 8th. St,Ozark, MO 65721. My phone is601-622-2577. Maybe we will makeit to the beach sometime. I will betraveling to Costa Rica in Octoberon a missions outreach with theVineyard Church of Jackson, MS.Blessings to you and Becky as yousettle into your new surroundings.”Mills Home alumna Shirley

Maxwell wrote: “Mr. Thompson,congratulation on your retirement. I enjoy your columns about KH somuch. It feels like I know you. I always open my Charity & Chil-dren to the last page first and then read about KH. I grew up atMH along with my two brothers. I graduated in 1953. I’m 84 and I recently retired, too. Last, but not least, I am a published author.My first book is called “ScatteredPieces.” It is my autobiography andabout growing up at MH and thetimes before with my grandma andafter graduating. I have written twoother books. You can find them onAmazon. May God bless you andtake care of you. Maybe our pathswill cross one day down the road.Shirley Maxwell, 3136 RockinghamRd. High Point, NC 27265.Nancy Lanier sent a note to let

us know how much she appreciatedliving at KH. Hugh Kirkman lived at KH in

1975. He is planning to attend theBeach Retreat this year. He must

have really learned how to keep a clean house at KH because whenhe goes to the beach he scrubsfloors, cleans bathrooms, and doesall kinds of housework. Hugh shared: “I loved going to

the gym when I was at KH. I lovedgoing camping back on the farmwith Mr. Thompson and severalothers. Mr. Thompson took me on my very first camping trip. Wetook flashlights and walked aroundlooking at the cows and deer. “Christmas time at KH was

very exciting. We always had a bigprogram at the gym and usually a guest sports star or someone likethat visited. Different people wouldcome to bring us gifts and have a special party just for our cot-tage –– I want to thank all thechurches that help KH. I lovedwatching a play about Tom Sawyerat the gym. That was neat! “Mr. Thompson, our choir direc-

tor, made singing fun. He took uson day camps, to the zoo, to theKinston pool, and out just to ridethe big, old blue bus. My favoriteplace he took us was to the Cliffs of the Neuse Park for hiking andswimming. We also went to the fair over in Kinston. “Mr. Thompson went to the

beach cottage in the summer tohelp Mrs. Cribb, our house mother,with all that we had to do at thebeach.”A blast from the past: In the

July 8, 1979, issue of Charity &Children, it was reported that sixteenages were baptized at the KHchurch. Parents, grandparents andfriends were invited to attend thebaptismal services. The pastor wasRev. Earl Haynes. Rev. Randall Watson was the minister ofmusic/education. In those days theyhad regular worship services everySunday. Children had the opportu-nity to talk to the pastor, the musicminister, or KH director Rev. RogerWilliams about becoming a Chris-tian. Mr. Lyn McCormick, one of thehouseparents, was chairman of thedeacons. He commented: “The keyword in all this is security. Often

children come into care feeling veryinsecure. Through individual andgroup participation in the cottage,campus and church, they come toknow Christ –– who is real security.” Today, the KH children go to

local churches as any family would.This is a great tool to help childrenlearn about church life and be exposed to opportunities to receiveChrist as their personal Saviour.God truly blessed Becky and me

with our move to Havelock. Both of our sons, Johnny and Scott, andtheir families live in Havelock. WithBecky’s poor health, they asked usto consider moving to Havelock sothey could help look after us better.We found a house after about a month. The day came to moveand the members of our churchcame out in full force to help withloading the big truck. About 26youth and adults came to our houseearly on that Saturday morning andloaded all our stuff. There wereabout five pick-up trucks, also.These wonderful people are friendsfrom the Centerview BaptistChurch of Jacksonville where Beckyand I have served the Lord for thepast five years. Now, listen to this, not only did

they load us up, they drove all theway to Havelock to unload all thetrucks and cars. This really blessedmy heart. Our pastors, Dr. MichaelSchwalm and Dr. Mark Thompsonwere leaders of the movers. Eventhe chairman of the deacons, Mr.Robert Perry, drove the big truck. Becky and I give a big thanks

to all who helped. Our new phonenumber is 252-671-3515. Ourmailing address is 110 Lee K. AllenDrive, Havelock, NC 28532. Let’skeep in touch. Please send articlesfor me to use each month tojthompson117@ec.rr.com. Remember to register for the

Beach Retreat on October 4, 5 & 6! Love ya! –– jt

[ KENNEDY HOME ALUMNI COLUMN }

Annual Beach Retreat is slated for October 4, 5 & 6 ––Alumni catch up and remember days past_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

By John Thompson, 110 Lee K. Allen Drive, Havelock, NC 28532 (252)671-3515 jthompson117@ec.rr.com

John Thompson was the choir director at Kennedy Home from1972-1977. Today, he enjoys a veryactive retirement.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/kennedyhomealumni 119/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8

Saturday morning –– the weather is gorgeous. I take my second cup of coffee onto the deck and listen to what Kathy

calls the “dawn chorus,” that joyful singing the birds do in the earlyhours. The breeze has just the right amount of coolness to make

staying outside feel good, even as I swat a mosquito away. I pull out my

phone to catch up on the news fromlast night. In my

role as grand-parent, that means

checking out Instagramfor latest photos and blurbs about

what those four wonders have experi-enced, enjoying life as true experts of living large. I am instantly captured bythe smiling face of Stuart in his ball uniform astride first base, glove ready,looking like a true boy of summer. In a few more seasons, his focused athletegaze will change. But now, Stuart looksright into the camera, looking for allthe world like he is in the middle of the best life ever.Our first grandson has a big personality and a huge can-do attitude, a combination that makeshim stand apart from the crowd.Stuart is fearless. He looks atobstacles as challenges, and in his world, challenges areopportunities to have newadventures and attainnew skills. As a toddler, Stuartcannonballed intoswimming pools

a few minutes after his first lesson at theYMCA. Last year inschool, he joined thechess team and competedagainst much older stu-dents. When we went to the zoo a few summers ago, heclimbed every boulder and jumped fromthe highest tops. On camping trips with his dad and brother, he fishesand shoots arrows from bows and sleeps under the stars. Among myphotos, I see the big fish and the bulls eyes. Stuart considers the world a playground, and he believes he can do anything he imagines.Last week in a letter to us, Stuart said he hopes our summer is going

well: “I’m having a perfect summer,” he assures us. And I know he is.He makes it that way.Recently, Stuart told me he was writing cartoons. He sent some

examples, sending his words and drawings from his Rocketbook to myiPad. I laughed aloud. He is witty, almost tongue-in-cheek, with his observations on life. I showed Kathy his work, commenting on theunique humor and perspective. We looked at each other and grinned.The cartoons are quintessential Stuart. I called him and asked him to create something for a back page story in C&C. “I can do that, Papa,”he told me. “I know it will be great, Stuart,” I responded. It is one of God’s richest blessings in my life to watch Stuart’s life

unfold. Sometimes, I see Kyle in his actions or hear my son in my grand-son’s humor. Most times, I stand in awe of the young man who sharesmy last name, and the pride I feel almost causes me to burst. His parentsare rearing a fine child, and they have instilled within him the belief thathe can do anything to which he sets his mind, coupled with the disciplineto work at tasks he deems important. How wonderful to admire thework ethic and character of one’s own grandson!My coffee is cooling, and I look at just a few more photos. There is

a snapshot of Stuart looking out a window. His blue eyes shine. The lookis anticipatory, watchful. He invitesthe day to come on –– he is ready andwilling to meet it head on. I look upand look out at my world and smile.Today, I promise myself, I will takeon my world Stuart-style. Let the adventures begin.

Edminson encouragesothers through theGood News of Jesus.Invite him to preach orspeak at your church.Email him at wjedmin-son@bchfamily.org.

Read more at #Homeword or www.bchfamily.org/charityandchildren.12 9/19 – Charity& Children – 132/8

Baptist Children’s Homes isaccredited by the Council on

Accreditation and is recognizedas a certified CARE agency.

Living life Stuart-style is living life as the best life ever

[ # H O M E W O R D }

____________________________________________________________________________________________________By Jim Edminson, Editor