The 7 Habits of Highly The 7 Habits of Highly Effective TeensEffective Teens

HabitsHabits

What are habits?What are habits?

Things we do repeatedly. But Things we do repeatedly. But most of the time we are hardly most of the time we are hardly aware of them. They’re on aware of them. They’re on autopilot.autopilot.

Good Habits

Exercising regularlyPlanning aheadShowing respect to others.

Bad Habits

Thinking negativelyFeeling inferiorBlaming others

Habits that don’t matterHabits that don’t matter

Takings showers at nightEating yogurt with a forkReading a magazine from back

to front.

Habits

Depending on what they are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do.

Samuel Smiles Quote

Sow a thought, and reap an act;

Sow an act, and you reap a habit;

Sow a habit, and reap a character;

Sow a character, and you reap a destiny.

What does this mean?

Habits

You are stronger than your habits. Therefore, you can change them.

The 7 Habits can help you: Get control of your life Improve your relationships with your

friends Make smarter decisions. Get along with your parents. Overcome addiction (food, soft drinks,

etc) (cont.)

Define your values and what matters most to you.

Get more done in less time. Increase your self-confidence.Be happyFind balance between, school,

friends, and everything else.

Dumb Statements made by Real Teens

““No one in my family has ever gone to college. I’d No one in my family has ever gone to college. I’d be crazy to think I could make it.”be crazy to think I could make it.”

““It’s no use. My stepdad and I will never get It’s no use. My stepdad and I will never get along. We’re just too different.”along. We’re just too different.”

““My teacher is out to get me.”My teacher is out to get me.” ““She’s so pretty – I’ll bet she is a jerkShe’s so pretty – I’ll bet she is a jerk ““You can’t get ahead in life unless you know the You can’t get ahead in life unless you know the

right people.”right people.” ““Me Thin? Are you kidding? My whole family is full Me Thin? Are you kidding? My whole family is full

of fat people.”of fat people.”

Habit #1Be Proactive

Take responsibility for your life.

A Defective Teen: blames all of their problems on their parents, their stupid teachers, lousy neighborhood

Proactive People Are not easily offendedAre not easily offended Take responsibility for their choicesTake responsibility for their choices Think before they actThink before they act Bounce back when something bad happensBounce back when something bad happens

Always find a way to make it happenAlways find a way to make it happen Focus on things they can do something Focus on things they can do something

about, and don’t worry about things they about, and don’t worry about things they can’tcan’t

We Can Control Only One Thing

We cannot control everything We cannot control everything that happens to us but we can that happens to us but we can control how we react.control how we react.

LanguageReactive LanguageReactive Language Proactive LanguageProactive Language

I’ll tryI’ll try I’ll do itI’ll do it

That’s just the way I amThat’s just the way I am I can do better than thatI can do better than that

There’s nothing I can doThere’s nothing I can do Let’s look at all our options.Let’s look at all our options.

I have toI have to I choose toI choose to

I can’tI can’t There’s gotta be a wayThere’s gotta be a way

You ruined my dayYou ruined my day I’m not going to let your bad I’m not going to let your bad mood rub off on me.mood rub off on me.

Proactive or Reactive The Choice is Yours

Reactive people make choices based on Reactive people make choices based on impulse. They are cans of soda pop. If life impulse. They are cans of soda pop. If life shakes them up a bit, the pressure builds shakes them up a bit, the pressure builds and they suddenly explode.and they suddenly explode.

Proactive people make choices based on Proactive people make choices based on values. They think before they act. They values. They think before they act. They recognize they can’t control everything that recognize they can’t control everything that happens to them, but they can control what happens to them, but they can control what they do about it. They are calm, cool, and in they do about it. They are calm, cool, and in control.control.

Scene 1 You overheard your best friend bad-You overheard your best friend bad-

mouthing you in front of a group. She mouthing you in front of a group. She doesn’t know you overheard the doesn’t know you overheard the conversation. Just five minutes ago, this conversation. Just five minutes ago, this same friend was sweet-talking you to your same friend was sweet-talking you to your face. You feel hurt and betrayed.face. You feel hurt and betrayed.

How would a reactive person handle it.How would a reactive person handle it. How would a proactive person handle it.How would a proactive person handle it.

Scene Two You’ve been working at your job in the store You’ve been working at your job in the store

for over a year now and have been for over a year now and have been extremely committed and dependable. extremely committed and dependable. Three months ago, a new employee joined Three months ago, a new employee joined the crew. Recently, he was given the the crew. Recently, he was given the coveted Saturday afternoon shift you were coveted Saturday afternoon shift you were hoping for.hoping for.

How would a reactive person act.How would a reactive person act. How would a proactive person act.How would a proactive person act.

Your Language

Listen to what you say are you Listen to what you say are you reactive or proactive.reactive or proactive.

Do you blame circumstances for Do you blame circumstances for your situation?your situation?

Do you make the best of your Do you make the best of your situationsituation??

Proactive or Reactive Reactive peopleReactive people

– Are easily offendedAre easily offended– Blame othersBlame others– Get angry and say things they later regretGet angry and say things they later regret– Whine and complainWhine and complain– Wait for things to happen to themWait for things to happen to them– Change only when they have to.Change only when they have to.

Defective Teen Blames all of their problems on their

parents, their stupid teachers, lousy neighborhood, boy or girlfriend, or something or somebody else. They’re a victim. They take no responsibility for their life. Act like an animal. If they are hungry they eat. If they are yelled at they yell back. If they feel like doing something they know is wrong, they do it anyway.

There’s a Hole in My SidewalkI walk down the street,

There is deep hole in the sidewalk.I fall in.

I am lost… I am helpless, It isn’t my fault.

It takes forever to find a way out.I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.I pretend I don’t see it.

I fall in again.I can’t believe I am in the same place

But, it isn’t my fault.It still take a long time to get out.

I walk down the same streetI walk down the same streetThere is a deep hole in the sidewalk. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it is there.I see it is there.I still fall in. It’s a habit.I still fall in. It’s a habit.

My eyes are open.My eyes are open.I know where I am.I know where I am.

It is my fault. I get out immediately.It is my fault. I get out immediately.

I walk down the same streetI walk down the same streetThere is a deep hole in the sidewalk.There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I walk around it.I walk around it.

I walk down another street.I walk down another street.

Habit #2Habit #2

Begin With the Begin With the

End in MindEnd in Mind

Habit #2 – Begin With the Habit #2 – Begin With the End in MindEnd in Mind

If teens aren’t clear about where they want to end up in life, about their values, goals, what they stand for, they will wander and waste time.

Habit #2 Begin With the Habit #2 Begin With the End in MindEnd in Mind

Create a personal mission statement which will act as a road map and direct and guide your decision-making process.

Habit #3Habit #3

Put First Things Put First Things FirstFirst

Habit #3 – Put First Things Habit #3 – Put First Things FirstFirst

This habit helps teens prioritize and manage their

time so that they focus on and complete the most important

things in their lives.

Habit #3 – Put First Things Habit #3 – Put First Things FirstFirst

Putting first things first also means leaning to overcome

fears and being strong during difficult times. It’s

living life according to what matters most.

Habit #4Habit #4

Think Win-WinThink Win-Win

Habit #4 – Think Win-WinHabit #4 – Think Win-Win

Teens can learn to foster the belief that it is possible to

create an atmosphere of win-win in every relationship.

Habit #4 – Think Win-WinHabit #4 – Think Win-Win

This habit encourages the idea that in any given

discussion or situation both parties can arrive at a

mutually beneficial solution.

Habit #4 – Think Win-WinHabit #4 – Think Win-Win

Learn to celebrate the accomplishments of others instead of being threatened

by the them

Habit #5 Habit #5

Seek First to UnderstandSeek First to UnderstandThen Be UnderstoodThen Be Understood

Habit #4 – Seek First to Habit #4 – Seek First to Understand, Then Be Understand, Then Be

UnderstoodUnderstood

Because most people don’t listen very well, one of the great

frustrations in life is that many don’t feel understood.

Habit #4 – Seek First to Habit #4 – Seek First to Understand, Then Be Understand, Then Be

Understood.Understood.

This habit ensures you learn the most important communication skill there is: active listening

Habit #6 Habit #6 Synergize Synergize

Habit #6 - SynergizeHabit #6 - Synergize

Synergy is achieved when two or more people work

together to create something better than either

could alone.

Habit #6 - SynergizeHabit #6 - Synergize

Synergy allows teens to value differences and better

appreciate others.

Habit #6 - SynergizeHabit #6 - Synergize

Through this habit, learn that it doesn’t have to be “your way” or “my way” but rather a better way.

Habit #7Habit #7

Sharpen the SawSharpen the Saw

Habit #7 – Sharpen the SawHabit #7 – Sharpen the Saw

Teens should never get to busy living not to take time to

renew themselves.

Habit #7 – Sharpen the SawHabit #7 – Sharpen the Saw

When a teen “sharpens the saw” he or she is keeping their

personal self sharp so that he/she can better deal with life.

Habit #7 – Sharpen the SawHabit #7 – Sharpen the Saw

Sharpening the saw means regularly renewing and strengthen the four key

dimensions of life – body, brain, heart, and soul.

7 HABITS OF HIGHLY 7 HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE TEENSEFFECTIVE TEENS

A Quick Review

7 Habits of Highly Effective 7 Habits of Highly Effective TeensTeens

Habit #1 – Be ProactiveHabit #1 – Be Proactive Habit #2 – Begin With the End in MindHabit #2 – Begin With the End in Mind Habit #3 – Put First things FirstHabit #3 – Put First things First Habit #4 – Think Win-WinHabit #4 – Think Win-Win Habit #5 - Seek First to Understand, Habit #5 - Seek First to Understand,

Then Be UnderstoodThen Be Understood Habit #6 – SynergizeHabit #6 – Synergize Habit #7 – Sharpen the SawHabit #7 – Sharpen the Saw