Test Time

Take out pen and paper Number your paper from 1

to 24 Select one relationship to

analyze– Past or Present

Be honest---these will NOT be collected!

Love It!!

1) My lover and I have the perfect physical chemistry between us

2) I feel that my lover and I were truly meant for each other (fate)

3) My lover and I really understand each other (soul mates)

4) My lover fits my ideal standards of physical beauty (my idea of a “10”)

5) I try to keep my lover a little uncertain about my commitment to him/her

6) I believe that what my lover doesn’t know about me won’t hurt him/her (I keep secrets)

Love??

7) It is important that our relationship is fun and exciting

8) When my lover gets too dependent on me, I want him/her to back off

9) To be genuine, love must develop over time (not an over-night thing)

10) I expect to always be friends with my lover

11) Our love is really a deep friendship, not a mysterious, mystical emotion

12) Our love is the most satisfying because it developed from, and is based on, a deep caring relationship

My new favorite

13) In choosing my lover, I believed it was best to love someone with a similar background

14) A main consideration in choosing my lover was whether my family would approve

15) An important factor in choosing a partner is whether or not he/she would be a good parent

16) One consideration in choosing my lover was what career he/she selected

17) When things aren’t right with my lover and me, my stomach gets upset

18) Sometimes I get so excited about being in love with my lover that I can’t sleep

I Don’t Get It?

19) When my lover doesn’t pay attention to me, I feel sick all over (emotionally, physically, etc.)

20) I cannot relax if I suspect that my lover is with someone else

21) I try to always help my lover through difficult times

22) I would rather suffer myself than let my lover suffer

23) When my lover gets angry with me, I still love him/her fully and unconditionally

24) I would endure all things for the sake of my lover

Gotta Love the 80s

Calculating the Results: Statements

» 1-4 are Eros

» 5-8 are Ludus

» 9-12 are Storge

» 13-16 are Pragma

» 17-20 are Manic

» 21-24 are Agapic

Highlight your high and low brackets– 3 to 4 “Trues or Falses” are Markers

Not All Love Is Healthy Love

Now What? 1) What do these findings tell you

about yourself?– Illuminate Mistakes?

– Illuminate Successes?

– Do you wish you could make different decisions about love?

2) Do it again with another “love” in mind– See how they differ

3) Have your boy/girlfriend take the test with you

I’m Embarrassed