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INSIDE THIS WEEK'S ISSUE s nthesis cal State Cli i1rn Confess ions Fe:bruairy 14

Confess.ion # 752 :I went to that :stripp.

chestnut last night and got m 08 with a belt by them strippe rs.

CAL STATE CHICO CONFESSIONS With Facebook Confessions sites ever increasing in popularity, Chico State is not to be left behind. See for yourself but remember, what you see cannot be unseen! You cannot get those hours of your life back; the ones you'll spend scrolling through screens and screens of sordid secrets and scorching scandalous escapades. Are these sites in poor taste? Or are they self-correcting communities with therapeutic possibilities?

THE KONA'S SINKHOLE It's not every day that the ground opens up and tries to swallow us whole. It's like a scene right out of Bob the Builder down there right now, and by the time this issue comes out, it should be very close to finished. When faced with a hole in the center of a busy sidewalk, and people asking, "Can you fix it?" Jeff Jukkola, the City of Chico, and contractor, Thomas H. Williams construction said, "Yes we can!"

SLIGHTLY LESS STRANGE When you mix together jazz, punk, and a generous portion of avant-garde, you get Tera Melos ... or at least you used to. Nowadays, the trio is pursuing a slightly more listener-friendly sound. But make no mistake, all the mind-blowing musical technicality the group utilized to build their worldwide fan base is still in tact, it's just been compartmentalized into a more digestible format, highlighting catchy hooks in place of dizzying instrumental arrangements. Synthesis spoke with bassist, Nathan Latona, to get the full update on Sacramento's most exciting band.

IMMACULATE INFECTION

PUT A FORK IN IT

COMICAL RUMINATIONS

OFF MY LAWN!

STREET STYLE

HOWL

syn.the.sis

05

06

07

16

17

20 The composition or combination of parts or

elements so as to form a whole b: the production

of a substance by the union of chemical

elements, groups, or simpler compounds or by

the degradation of a complex compound c : the

combining of often diverse conceptions into a

coherent whole; also : the complex so formed

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Sara Calvosa sara@synthesis.net

The Plague is Upon Me Ah, the Spring Thrax. It's somewhere between allergies and pneumonia. The kinda sick wherein you regu-larly pour yourself a nice, smooth, room temperature three-fingers ofNyQuil and kick back with your inhaler preparing to dream about losing your teeth and flying over low buildings. That's been my world for the past week-coughing up parcels of seal blubber and wheezing my way through a pretty intense Fringe marathon for a few days until I woke up and thought, "Shit, I think have tuberculosis'.' It felt like I was one bloody nose away from Ebola and one rash shy of the Scarlet Fever.

I've been quarantining myself pretty well this past week, but there's no escaping the family. My head was so utterly fogged and muffled up, communication felt like talking underwater. The kids just seemed like baby birds, necks stretching up at me with their big mouths open. Not the cute kind of baby birds, the kind that are all scraggly and bug-eyed from just hatching. I wanted to wretchedly whine at them, "It seems like I just fed you! Why can't you feed yourself yet?"

I'll tell you why they can't feed themselves, my nine-year­old apparently made an egg salad sandwich the other day (unbeknownst to me somehow), but upon finding that we were out of mayo, he decided to use peanut butter instead. He slapped that concoction onto some bread and ate it for lunch. He then declared it good, "eggy and peanutty at the same time'.' I nearly threw up in a trashcan when he told me about it. Kids, they'll blow your mind all day if you let them.

But anyway, I'm sick. There's all sorts of stuff in this issue, I can't for the life of me remember what any of it is though. The table of contents is like right over there to the left, so while I cough my brains out and choke on my own coagulated mucous, you enjoy this fine periodical and be sure to tell all your friends about it.

APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 3

WORD PUZZLE What did they find when the sidewalk collapsed? Who knows! Can you find 6 six-letter words in the word COLLAPSE?

COLLAPSE 1. - - - - - -2 • - - - - - -3. - - - - - -4. - - - - - -5. - - - - - -6. - - - - - -

Word Puzzle created by Bethany Johnson

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sign up at wigibuy.com *Feel good! 5% of wigibuy sales are donated

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synthesis For 19 years The Synthesis goal has

remained to provide a forum for entertainment, music, humor, community

awareness. opinions. and change.

PUBLISHER Kathy Barrett

kathy@synmedia.net

MANAGING EDITOR Sara Calvosa

editorial@synthesis .net

ARTS EDITOR Nolan Ford

nolan@synthesis.net

DESIGNERS Michaela Warthen

Paige Cloke Tanner Ulsh

graphics@synthesis .net

DELIVERIES Joey Murphy Molly Roberts

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Arielle Mullen. Bob Howard. Danny Cohen.

David Neuschatz. Dillon Carroll. Erica Koenig. Guy Starvist. Howl. Jack Knight. Jaime O"Neill.

Jen Cartier. Josie Hall. Jeremy Gerrard. Kenneth Kelly. Koz McKev. Ky Junkins. Matt O lson. Ryan

Hawkley. Steve Swim. Tommy Diestel

PHOTOGRAPHY Jessica Sid

Vincent Latham

CALENDAR Bethany Johnson

calendar@synthesis.net

NERD Dain Sandoval

dain@synthesis .net

ACCOUNTING Ben Ki rby

DIRECTOR OF OPERATIONS Karen Potter

OWNER Bill Fishkin

bill@synthesis.net

The Synthesis is both owned and published by Apartment 8 Productions. All things published in these pages are the property of Apartment 8 Productions and may not be reproduced. copied or used in any other way. shape or form without the written consent of Apartment 8 Productions. One copy (maybe two) of the Synthesis is available free to residents in Butte, Tehama and Shasta counties. Anyone caught removing papers will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law (and our law!). All opinions expressed throughout the Synthesis are those of the author and are not necessarily the same opinions as Apartment 8 Productions and the Synthesis. The Synthesis welcomes. wants. and will even desperately beg for letters because we care what you think. We can be reached via snail mail at the Synthesis. 210 W. 6th St .• Chico. California. 95928. Email letters@synthesis.net. Please sign all of your letters with your real name. address and preferably a phone number. We may also edit your submission for content and space.

210 West 6th Street Chico Ca 95928

530.899.7708 info@synthesis.net

SY NTH ESISWE EKLY.COM

IMMACULATE INFECTION Bob Howard madbob@madbob.com

Warding Off The Fear Another "terror attack'' has been carried out

on US soil. As of this writing, the powers that be won't say if it originated overseas or

domestically. Hell, they won't even officially

call it a terrorist attack. But to me, when you

detonate bombs in crowds of people, that's terror. It's an eerie, awful, surreal feeling to

watch the footage on the newscasts. I can't

imagine anyone except for the very young, or the pathologically na'ive, thinking this wasn't

coming. They happen like clockwork, but the

knowledge of inevitability doesn't make these

kinds of

I'm learning an awful lot out here about the soil, and water, and about how to work steady

and hard without working myself into an

early grave. There are many instances of great satisfaction, but also times when I'm not so

sure. I'm often confronted with the fact that

I barely know what I'm doing. Sometimes

I have no idea what I'm doing. Even worse,

occasionally I think I know what I'm doing,

but it turns out I do not. There are moments of

complete panic, frustration, and fear.

nightmare

scenarios any

more bearable. +MEDICAL My dad is getting older, and it

seems he may be succumbing to

the fear. He told

me recently he

was glad Trish

and I are out here

living on a fairly

good-sized piece ofland, because

he is afraid the world's economy

is going to collapse. I don't

know how far he's

really thought

this through.

Trish and I are

It's tough

for me­

suburban­

raised,

liberally

educated, fully

entitled to the

best American

life has to offer-to

understand

the desire

to injure or

kill random

people. I can

only imagine

this kind

of violence

1' •

requires a deep and abiding sense of anger, self­righteousness, or both. I suppose it isn't for me

to comprehend. My deepest sympathies rest

with the people who have been injured, and

with the families who have lost loved ones.

Back to the Land

Here on the farm, the winter crops are

producing. We're regularly harvesting peas and radishes, and the mustard greens, chard,

and beets are starting to provide food. The

corn, beans, and squash are barely poking up

through the warming soil, and the greenhouse

is bursting with starts for warmer season crops: tomatoes, cucumbers, sweet and hot peppers.

in the process

of planning an

underground

pub, and focusing

great energy on establishing an orchard for the

sole purpose of making hard apple cider. I'm

not sure how long wea survive the apocalypse, or how long wea want to, but we'll have as

much fun as we can doing it.

Terrorist attacks aside, I'm not a great fan of the fear. It's not that I can't envision economic

collapse, or environmental ruin, but what's the

point in getting paranoid about it all? Whatever shall be shall be. We live our lives, we do the

best we can, and we carry on. What other

choice do we have?

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 5

ON THE TOWN PHOTOS BY JESSICA SID

. -" ~ ... . '• ... . ... \. ·..e • " ll!!'A

I 6 APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013

COMICAL RUMINATIONS Zooey Mae zooeymae@synthesis.net

Someone Give Me A Hug I can't imagine any quicker way to have my vexations brought sharply into focus than to learn of yet another tragedy in our corner of the world. It doesn't matter if your problems stem from your roommate's girlfriend using the washer and dryer in your house to clean every goddamn piece of clothing they own on a weekly basis, the nuisance and bother of school, or the delusional man in your neighborhood who stands on the corner most mornings, muttering under his breath, accusing you of plagiarizing his manifesto and passing it off as your own; when something like this happens, it causes us (hopefully) to see things a little more clearly.

Anyway, in an effort to distract myself from the disaster developing in my shoes, I pulled out my phone and checked my favorite online news source, Dailymail.com. For the uninitiated, Dailymail is the premier news source for those of us who like to know what the people in the UK are thinking

about. (Hint: Margaret Thatcher and Kim Kardashian in endless combinations). Instead of the usual images of Kim Kardashian's giant pregnant ass, I saw the bloody streets of Boston with the headline "TRAGEDY STRIKES IN BOSTON:'

Maybe it's because I'm older now than I was when the Twin Towers were attacked, or maybe it's that the cruelty of purposely attacking a celebration seems especially evil, but this incident has

On Monday I was walking to

upset me infinitely Here's a picture of kangaroos hugging, because

more than 9/11. it's been a rough week and you deserve it.

class, mentally scolding myself for putting lotion on my feet and not waiting for it to dry before leaving the house in sandals with slippery leather insoles, when I learned of the bombing in Boston. (By the way, this is a problem I create for myself at least three days a week, and more often in the summer, because I was born without a drop of patience.) I was walking slowly, trying to grip the stupid tiny straps of my shoes with my toes, fighting the urge to just kick them off and join the ranks of the Chico Blackfoot Army (see also: young people with Pit Bulls, nose rings, matted/dreaded hair, and those woven straw cowboy hats that have looked good on NO ONE since their inception in the early 2000s).

It has since been revealed that the bombs were constructed from pressure cookers filled with shards of metal, nails, and ball bearings; the same design of those used frequently in Pakistan, Afghanistan, India and Nepal. The bombs seemed to target the lower half of the victims, which seems like a particularly cruel twist considering these people were just finishing a marathon. It makes my knees weak to consider what it would be like to have a tragedy like that happen closer to home in San Francisco or Portland, Oregon. I hope in recent days you've done as I have-squeezed your loved ones and tried to be easy on one another.

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

PUT A FORK IN IT Jen Cartier blushcatering@gmail.com

Gardenia-Kissed Air I'm in need of comfort food. The kind that reminds you of warmth and sustenance. The kind that exhales aroma; aroma that dances its way into our homes and hearts, reminding us that there is always something promising ahead.

Spring lets those little phallic asparagus come up in all their glory, and they are exceedingly enticing. Have you seen Al Vogel's lovely rustic and spindly asparagus at the Saturday Farmer's Market? I love how wild it seems, how unrefined and real - not to mention delicious.

I ran across this recipe from Nigella Lawson when I was flipping through her book, Nigella Kitchen. I feel like it's the perfect dish for right now. The wind has been blowing and the seasons haven't been quite sure how to navigate their path. Winter has been pulling at the end of Spring's dress, trying hard to keep her from coming into full bloom. I plan to make peace with the seasons' confusing crossroads by marrying sweet potatoes and asparagus.

Sweet Potato Supper (Serves 2) -Two sweet potatoes or yams (washed and dried but not peeled), each cut into quarters -Eight ounces (1/2 cup) smoked lardons, cubed pancetta, or 16 slices smoked bacon,

snipped -Eight ounces asparagus tips -Six cloves garlic, unpeeled -A few sprigs of fresh thyme or one teaspoon dried thyme -Three tablespoons cold-pressed canola oil (I would just substitute olive oil here) -Salt to taste -Salad leaves, to serve (optional) -Chili sauce, to serve (optional) -One large round roasting pan approx. 10-inches diameter, or any regular roasting pan

-Preheat the oven to 425 degrees F, and get out a roasting pan for all the ingredients. I use one like a giant tarte tatin pan, but a regular smaller pan would be fine too.

-Arrange the sweet potato chunks in the pan. Then, drop in most of the lardons or bacon, followed by the asparagus tips and garlic cloves and, finally, the remaining lardons.

-Sprinkle with the thyme, pour the oil over, then bake in the oven for 30 minutes, before turning the sweet potatoes over and baking for a further 30 minutes.

-Let everything cool just a little (you'll only burn your tongue otherwise) before dividing between two plates, strewn (or not, to choice) with salad leaves, and sprinkling with

some salt or chili sauce, or both, as mood dictates.

I'll leave you with a little Nigella-inspired bit of wisdom: in the kitchen, and in life, it's always best to wait for things to cool a little before taking a bite. You wouldn't want to get burned. It's also best to listen to yourself, to make choices about salad leaves, chili sauce, and life paths as your mood and spirit dictate.

Even with all this wind, spring is right around the corner. I can smell it in the gardenia-kissed air. Enjoy!

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 7

to KAOW • Secret? A peek into Chico State's Facebook confession page.

The confessional is where Catholics go to confess their sins, to be given absolution, to be forgiven. Like Chico's own online Vatican, the Cal State Chico Confessions Facebook page is loaded full of scandalous confessions just waiting for public absolution. Or in some cases, a righteous public shaming.

In recent months we've been pulling apart our collective community closets, taking our own inventory, tired of walking a fine line between debaucherous and disgusting. And now, we can count among our inventory a Chico State Confessions Facebook page.

"Greeeeaaat;' I thought. I wasn't the only one that thought it was in poor taste, the administration at Chico State asked that the page be taken down. Butte College's confession page was taken down on April 1st, leading people to believe that it was an April Fool's Day joke.

cal State Chico Confess ions February 14 li'I

Confession #75 2:1 went to that stripper party on tenth and chestnut last night and got my bare ass slapped 36 times with a belt by them strippers . I feel li ke a need a man diaper now.

Like · Comment · Share .:J 16 Q l

After reading through too many confessions, I decided I had to know who the sleaze ball( s) who created this Facebook page were. I sent a message asking for a meeting. To my utter delight, they agreed. I envisioned one or two pasty-white, hulking jerks from So Cal-the kind of guys that wear v-neck t-shirts, Mr. T starter kits, and jeans that look like women's jeans with all that tacky embroidery on the back of their pockets. Or maybe they were just from Fresno, who knew? Either way, they had to be awful, right?

Uh, notsomuch.

I a APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013

Leo, the chattiest of the really reticent, barely-chatty bunch, "My friend goes to Cal State Pomona and he made a confessions Facebook page there. He's the one that told me that I should start one for Chico. I mean if Pomona's page was good, then Chico's has to be really good, right?" The group felt Chico's reputation as a party school would definitely lend itself to some badass confessions. It was practically a matter of pride.

How it works is pretty simple. Confessors follow a link posted on the Face book page ( www. surveymonkey.com/s/ YBQM26J) to submit their confessions. Confessions are submitted anonymously and the admins have

Photo: Icetray, via www123rfcom no way of knowing who you are,

cal State Chico Confessions about an hour ago near Chico li'I

confess ion # 1610: I had to write a paper for class one monday, but I dropped acid instead. Fucking love this town.

Like · Comment · Share

I'.'.] 4 people like this.

I met with three of the four administrators of Cal State Chico Confessions and they could not have been a geekier bunch. They are all freshman at Chico State and Southern California natives. "I was really thinking you'd be more douchy;' I said disappointedly. How did these three unassuming, soft-spoken, seemingly nice guys come to be the admins of what is quite possibly the most visible and vile evidence of Chico State's party problems? They laughed and told me about the conception of Confessions.

cal State Chico Confessions February 19 via mobile li'I

Confession # 873: I stole a burrito from a ginger this weekend

Like · Comment · Share

contacting you, or calling your mother. Once you've confessed and hit submit, you go into a queue to be reviewed by the admins.

Cal State Chico Confessions February 24 via mobile li'I

Confession #10 16: I've harassed one g uy for months because he hooked up with my friend and not me.

Like · Comment · Share Q 20

"We get about 100 [confessions] a day now. It's crazy;' said Bird. They knew Confessions had potential to be popular, but they didn't realize how many people they were really reaching. "When we went on Spring Break, we took two weeks off and thought nobody would really notice, but so many people were like, 'Hey, when are you gonna post more confessions?!"' Leo said with a laugh.

J Cal State Chico Confessions February 21 li'I

confess ion # 94 1: i peed in the WREC pool :/

Like · Comment · Share .:J 15 Q 5

SYN TH ESISWEE KLY.COM

Cal State Chico Confessions February 17 WI

confess ion # 823 : This page is awful. People who anonymous ly bash other people on the Internet need to get a life . I feel like I can 't so anyth ing or say anything anymore knowing that someone could take it out of context and post it on he re. This isn't right. If you're going to take time out of your day to go talk shit about someone that shows what kind of person YOU are. Those comme nts ARE BULLYING. You could ruin people's lives wi th shit people post on here about others. Comments need to be filtered before god fo rbid someone decides to ta ke the ir own life because they were bu llied on a stupid confessions page.

Like · Comment · Share .:J 60 Q 3

They can't post all the confessions they receive and wouldn't even if they could. They filter out posts with racist comments or bigoted language. They also toss out the clearly over-embellished confessions about the amazing partytimes that are clearly born out of somebody's imaginary Internet fantasy come to life. But even with these filters, there are plenty of scandalous confessions to go around. According to the admins, they also filter out personal information and names. This wasn't the case in the early days (three months ago)

of Confessions, but name-shaming quickly became a huge problem.

Cal State Chico Confessions February 21 WI

confess ion # 979: I completely blacked out at the zoo one night and woke up sti ll drunk in a gi rls bed on the ni nth floor of Whitney. Almost immediate ly after waking up, I ran to the closest bathroom (which happened to be the gir ls) and proceeded to paint th e sta ll with puke. I came back into he r room and she gave me a ride home without me even asking. It was ch il l.

Like · Comment · Share

Now, some people might say that websites like Confessions are glorifying everything about Chico State that needs to change. The excessive booze and partying, the drugs and sex ... I mean, when the nurse at Chico State just casually says, "Syphilis is going around. Be careful;' nobody bats an eye anymore.

Cal State Chico Confessions March 28 WI

confess ion # 1466: What's the need fo r the mossy camo on campus? .. . I can sti ll see youl

Like - Comment · Share

.:J 31 people li ke thi s.

Cal State Chico Confessions February 21 WI

confe ss ion # 929: I stole $4,000 as the treasurer of my fraternity.

Like · Comment · Share .:J 10

I asked the boys what they thought about being accused of glorifying bad behavior. Leo responded, "You know, yeah ... but the thing is, the community regulates itself. If somebody [confesses] something, the community will let them know what they think about it and give them advice or tell them that they're wrong:'

Cal State Chico Confessions February 2 5 WI

confess ion # 1089: I am insecure in every aspect of my life and I hate it. I don't think I'm smart eno ug h, I don't think I'm pretty enough, I don 't think I'm skinny enough, and I feel li ke I care way more about my friend s and my boyfriend than they care about me. This is the worst feeling ever and just want it to stop.

Like · Comment · Share

.:J 10 people li ke this .

Amanda Geahry Hang in there <:::/ February 25 at 4:5 7pm · Li ke · ,j 2

.:J 10 Q 3

• , Prin Mayowa Talk 10 SOMEONE. It's the hardest t hing to take on th at fe eling by yourself. Askin g for help is the hardest but most rewarding thing you co uld po.sibly do. February 25 at 5:13pm via mobile · like · ,j 9

Jessy Smith They have free counseling in the SSC build in g. I think it'd be good fo r yo u to talk to someone. February 25 at 10: lOpm · Like · ,j 3

Then, they related a story about a girl that sent them a Facebook message, without going through the anonymous link. She reportedly confessed that she'd been sexually assaulted and the admins, without displaying her name or contact information, posted her confession. According to the admins, the community quickly rallied around her and offered words of encouragement, as well as information about how to get help, and advice. In response to criticism that they shouldn't have posted such a personal and awful confession, an admin replied, "she came to us, she sought us out, and sent us that message, knowing what the site was all about, looking for help:'

cal State Chico Confessions 23 hours ago near Chico WI

confess ion # 1613: I have had sex with 2 pike guys. And I' m a guy.

Like · Comment · Share

.:J 35 people li ke this .

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

This particular instance seems to provide an example of the possibility of a positive outcome, an anonymous support system. It can be a place where students, far from home with nowhere to turn, can go to throw a lifeline into the ether.

Cal State Chico Confessions February 20 WI

confess ion # 920: I eat chocolate in the shower. I used to do it a lot as a kid because that was the only place I could sneak it and now I j ust do it because I can .

Like - Comment - Share

No matter what side you're on or how you view Confession sites, I think we can all agree that sometimes replies to confessions can quickly turn into a scene from Lord of the Flies. Often the responses to confessions are more scandalous than the confession itself, especially when commenters are responding from their personal Facebook accounts.

Cal State Chico Confessions February IO WI

confess ion #629: Walk ing home from a party las t nigh t. We noticed a house on 7 and ivy that was wide open and mus ic playing ... but no one was in it. We took your fat t ires and bailed thanks .

Li ke · Comment · Share .:J 15 Q 3

Any time spent perusing the Chico State Confessions Facebook page may leave you feeling like there aren't enough showers in the world to make you feel clean. And this online confession trend is popping up everywhere. Long gone are the diary days, these anonymous Facebook confession pages are burning down college campuses across the country. If PostSecret and Reddit had a baby, itCl probably look a lot like Cal State Chico Confessions-poignant personal confessions with poor spelling, while also not being true most of the time. Whether these confession sites are actually community regulated and therapeutic is up to the reader and, maybe more importantly, the confessor.

Have something you need to confess? http://wwwfacebook.com/ CalStateChicoConfessions

APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 9 I

WHERE THE SIDEWALK ENDS ... I'm sure you've all noticed the enormous clusterfuck on 2nd & Main Street in front ofKona's Sammiches, but it's actually a pretty cool story, bro. Jeff Jukkola, the man with the plan when it comes to repairing the sinkhole, took some time to tell us what happened and how they plan to fix it. Surprisingly, there are quite a bit of underground tunnel shenanigans in Downtown Chico.

So why did the sidewalk cave in? Underneath Kona's is a deep, dark basement with a brick wall facing out towards the street. Behind that brick wall is another thinner brick wall, and behind that was just a bunch of dirt backfilled in. The sidewalk was then poured on top of that big pile of dirt at street level. When the little, thinner brick wall deteriorated, the basement wall weakened, and the dirt came piling into the basement. Kona's employees heard a loud crash, but didn't investigate right away (because if thou ignorest thine loud crash, then perhaps thine crash does not exist?) The lack of support from the backfilled dirt, which had all gone piling into the basement of Kona's, caused the sidewalk to collapse.

Knowing that it needed to be fixed, JeffJukkola-Civil Engineer for the City of Chico and Roundabout Mastermind-developed a design to fix the issue. But due to the Kona's baking schedule, they had to work fast and they had to work weird. Working around Kona's baking schedule and ensuring that there's still access to their storefront with minimal interruption to their business, Jukkola and local construction company Thomas H. Williams worked long, strenuous hours around Kona's schedule. With just four guys (nay, animals) working around the clock, they managed to figure out a way to finish it all in under two weeks.

Now the question begs, will there be regular inspections? And are there other buildings teetering on the brink of creating a sinkhole city?

words by Sara Calvosa · photos by Jeff Jukkola

10 APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 SYNTH ESISWE E KLY.COM

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APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 11 I

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I 12 APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013

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Baby Back Ribs Sl0.99 Philly Cheesesteak S7 8PM-Close S4 teas

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SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

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FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

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Happy Hour 4-8PM SS House Martinis S4 Glass of House Wine S3 Well Cocktails 20% off wine by bottle SI off Call liquor and bottled beer

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~ Expires 7-20-2013 •

-----------------------· 1304 Mangrove Ave.

(Facing Papa Murphy's Pizza)

530-588-3376 www.ChicoiSto re.com

APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 13 I

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14 APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013

THURSDAY, APRIL 25rH THURSDAY, APRIL 25rH

Pat Hull w/Jonathan Huffman & Brianna Lea Pruett

MANAS ART SPACE Sometimes you just have to slow down and break away from the torrents of life. This Thursday escape to Manas, sit back, relax, and mellow out to the soulful sounds of Pat Hull, Jonathan Huffinan, and Brianna Lea Pruett. Manas, which is Sanskrit for "mind;' was created around the idea of reflection and provides the space for Chico locals, Pat and Jonathan, and Sacramento's Brianna to reflect upon life lyrically and melodically. Because the desire is for everyone to be able to attend, all ages are welcome to this SPM show and the cover will be a sliding scale from $5-$10.

Duffy's Sirens Showcase DUFFY'S TAVERN This is it, folks. In addition to being three of the most charming bartenders in town, Lisa Valentine, Aubrey Debauchery, and Katrina Rodriguez also happen to be very talented musicians and this Thursday they'll be showcasing their various musical projects. Rumor has it Debauchery will be backed by the Bogg boys as well as Teeph drummer Alex Coffin, Valentine is likely to showcase support from master guitarist Dave Elke, and Rodriguez' band, The Rugs, will do their very best to not make her look bad. People over 21 should come on down around SPM, bring five bucks to get in, and try not to drool too much over these witty, talented babes.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

22 MONDAY DownLo: Game night with DJ DannyK. 7PM

The Bear: Bear-E-oke! 9PM. The Hub: Hot Chico Salsa - Beg. Cafe Flo: Jazz Happy Hour with Int. $8; Beg. II $5; Just Latin Carey Robinson Trio. 5-7PM. Dancing $2. Followed by The Harmed Broth- LaSalle's: '90's Night. 21 +. ers, Willy Tea (from The Good Maltese: Karaoke 9PM-Close. Luck Thrift Store Outfit), & The Park Avenue Pub: Live music Sons ofJefferson. 7-9PM. with Hanging by a String Band. DownLo: Pool League - 3 player 7-9PM. teams, sign up with bartender. Sierra Nevada Big Room: Marty 7PM. Stuart - Four-time Grammy win-El Rey Theatre: Zakk Wylde ner. 7:30PM. $32.50. (Acoustic). Doors 7PM, Show Studio Inn Lounge: Karaoke 8PM. $35 door, $30 adv. 8:30PM-1AM. Last Call Lounge: Karaoke. 8PM. The Tackle Box: Karaoke 9PM. Maltese: Open Mic Night - Towne Lounge: Hella Exclusive Comedy. Signups@ 8, Starts@ 9. Last Call for One Stand with Mug Night 7-l 1:30PM. Jpeg! Retro Digital Rebound-Woodstock's: Spelling Bee For You better TWERK! ! Final show the Grown Ups. 6:30-7:30PM. (He's moving to Hollywood)

23 TU ES DAY ~~~dby/ DJsetbyDJJpeg.

1 OOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Dreamwork Circle - Share dreams & explore techniques for discovering their secrets. 6:30-8PM. $10. The Bear: Bear Wear! 1/2 off while wearing Bear Wear. Mug Club 4- lOPM. Cafe Flo: Open Mic with Aaron. 7-9PM. Crazy Horse Saloon: All-request karaoke. 21+.

Stop by today for a fresh oven wood-fired pizza! Men, Wed & Friday 11am-8pm located ot Spiioe's Bottle Shop 1270 East 1st A....,· 530.864.2760 facebook~cm/popspizzas

Woodstock's: Trivia Challenge. Call @ 4PM on date to reserve a table. 6:30 PM.

24 WEDNESDAY 1 OOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Open Mic. Singers, songwriters, musicians, vocalists and comedi­ans. All ages welcome. 7PM. The Bear: Trike Races. Wint­shirts and Bear Bucks. Post time lOPM. Mug club 4-lOPM.

Cafe Flo: Jazz Happy Hour with Carey Robinson Trio. 5-7PM. Followed by Way Out West with the Blue Merles. 7:30-9:30PM. Crazy Horse Saloon: Wild dance lessons, mechanical bull, Crazy Horse Girls, DJ Hot Rod Ent. 8-lOPM. Chico Women's Club: West African Dance with Imelda Mata. Live drumming. 5:30-7PM. $10. Chico Women's Club: Ecstatic Dance. Live music played by the TranceFormation Band. 7:15-8:30. DownLo: Live music with Max Minardi. 9:30PM-midnight. 8 Ball Tournament. Signups 6PM, Starts 7PM. Duffy's: Dance night! DJ Spenny and Jeff Howse. 9PM. El Rey Theatre: Katchafire w/ Maoli. Doors 7:30PM, Show 8:30PM. $20 door, $18 adv. Feather Falls Casino: Dance Club. Dress to impress! 9:30PM. $5 cover includes one drink. LaSalle's: Z-Rock presents The Money Shot Rock Fight Round 3 - Armed for Apocalypse vs. Clouds on Strings. 9PM. $3. Maltese: Live music with mAR­MITs, Pageant Dads, & Califor­nia Walrus. 8PM. $3. Park Avenue Pub: Live music

with Bob & Darby. 7-9PM. Tackle Box: Beginner Swing Dancing Lessons. 7-9PM. Towne Lounge: Black Fong. 9PM. VIP Ultra Lounge (Inside The Beach): Laurie Dana. 7-9PM. Woodstock's: Trivia Night plus Happy Hour. Call @ 4PM on date to reserve a table. 8PM.

25 THURSDAY Cafe Coda: Bunnymilk, Ernesto Alvarado, Adam Scarborough, & Erin Lizardo. 8PM. Cafe Flo: Molly's Favorite Irish Music Happy Hour. 5-7PM. Fol­lowed by Blues Unplugged with Steven Truksol & Special Guests. 7-lOPM. Dex (New Venue, Downtown): Live music with Little War Twins (East Coast), Icko Sicko, & KASM. 8PM. $6. DownLo: Chico Jazz Collective every Thursday. 8PM. Downtown Chico: Thursday Night Market: Chico Creek Dance Centre, Jeff Pershing Band, Kyle Williams, Bob Mc­Daniel. 6-9PM. Duffy's: Duffys' Sirens Show­case - Lisa Valentine, Katrina Rodriguez, Aubrey Debauchery (feat. BOGG and Alex Coffin).

SY NTH ESISWEE KLY.COM

SATURDAY, APRIL 27rH

A Berry Workshop

HUMBOLDT COMMUNITY GARDEN

Do you wish you could capture that amazing, summer berry smell for your own garden space? But does the idea of a thorny, brambly nightmare keep you from realizing all your berry pick­ing dreams? Cultivating Community North Valley presents A Berry Work­shop! Sherri Scott of GRUB Grown Plants is offering a basic introduction to berry fundamentals workshop. Check it out Saturday, April 27th, from 2:00-4:00PM at the Humboldt Community Garden. Pre-registration required at: cultivatingcommunitynv.org

SUNDAY, APRIL 28rH

'lJIDA Y An<Il JBTf-1 'tlvl il-i5 .AD\\ISSI~

In Memory of Katie Kelly CAFE CODA Katie Kelly was a wonderful person who touched the lives of many people in Chico. She also maintained a particularly strong presence in the local music scene. To honor her memory, a collection of Chico's greatest musicians will come together to perform this Sunday. The show will feature a variety of different acts including the very special reunion of her band, Candy Apple. The all-ages event starts at SPM and costs $3-$5. All proceeds will go to benefit the Sabbath House of Chico.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • 8PM. $5. Graduate: Red Bull Movie Night. lOPM. Grana: Live Jazz w/ John Seid 5:30-8:30PM. Has Beans: Open Mic Night. 7-lOPM. Sign-ups start@ 6PM. Lakeview Restaurant (Oroville): Carey Robinson Jazz. 6-9PM. LaSalle's: Happy Hour: The Ret­rotones. 6-9PM. No cover. Lost On Main: Dancehall featur­ing - AZ Redsmoke & cootdog. 9PM. $2. Maltese: Karaoke 9PM-Close. Manas Art Space: Pat Hull with Jonathan Huffman & Brianna Lea Pruett. 8PM. $5-$10 sliding scale. Panama's: Eclectic Nights- Buck Night & DJ Eclectic spinning favorites of today and yesterday on the patio. 9PM. Quackers: Karaoke Night with Andy. 9PM-1AM. Towne Lounge: Dive Bar Disco -Come get Hasselhoffed. 9PM. $1. VIP Ultra Lounge: Acoustic Per­formance w/ Bradley Relf. 7-9PM. No cover.

26 FRIDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Writing Group - Write, & share. 3:30-5PM The Beach: DJ 2K & Mack Mor-

ris. 9PM-close. $2, $10 VIP. Cafe Coda: Deaf Pilots, Bullets For Balloons, Furlough Fridays, & Mad Bob Howard. 8PM. Cafe Flo: Flo Sessions - Friday Night Music Showcase. 7- lOPM. Dex (New Venue, Downtown): Live music with Ashes, The Last Scenario, Fill The Void, Blood Cabana, & Fallin' To Rise. DownLo: Sonic Gravity, Sam Graden, & The Dolla' Bills. Duffy's: Pub Scouts. 4-7PM. Harlow's (Sacramento): Built To Spill. 9:30PM. $25. 21 + Kelly's Tavern (Oroville): Kara­oke with Mora Sounds. 7-llPM. LaSalle's: Mark Morris and The Elite Crew. 8PM. Lakeview Restaurant (Oroville): Carey Robinson Jazz. 6-9PM. Lost On Main: Fever Fridays with DJ Trazz & DJ FreakBeatz. Dress to impress! Maltese: Fabulous Friday LG­BTQA +Dance Party and GoGo dancers. 9PM. Monstro's: Bobby Joe Ebola, Frankie Doppler's Nuclear Sunrise, Badger, & Icko Sicko. 8PM. $5. Peeking: BassMint - Electronic Dance Party. 9:30PM. $3-5. Quackers: Live DJ. 9PM. T-Bar: Live music 7-8:30PM.

Tackle Box: Live music w/ Dylan's Dharma. 9PM. $3. Tortilla Flats: Latin Nights. Espanol & English DJ dancing with DJ (El, Kora) de Chico. Towne Lounge: Happy Hour -Cougar Night. 9PM.

27 SATURDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Knitting Circle. 2-4PM. 1078 Gallery: French Reform, Tiny Pyramids, & Star Thistle Wall. 8PM. $5. All ages. Cafe Coda: Boss 501, Burnt, Big Tree Fall Down, Frankie Dop­pler's Nuclear Sunrise. 8PM. Cafe Flo: Drum Circle at Flo lOAM. Bluegrass Jam with Lucy Smith l-4PM. Still Not Dead Yet I Bring Out Your Dead 7-lOPM. Cal Skate: Adults Only Skate Night. 9-11:30PM. $6. 18+ Dex (New Venue, Downtown): Live music with Sorin, Waning, & Silent Cartographer. 8PM. $7. DownLo: 9 Ball Tournament. Signups noon, starts lPM. Farwood Bar & Grill (Orland): Live music with Cee Dub -Acoustic variety. 8:30-10:30PM. Harlen Adams Theatre: Jazz X-Pressions - Music created by and for the Jazz X-Press. 7:30PM. $15/$13/$6.

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LaSalle's: 1980NOW! 8PM. Lost On Main: Eliquate Does America with the Deaf Pilots

- Eliquate, Deaf Pilots, Dysphunc­tional Species, and Planet Booty. 9PM. FREE before lOPM and $3 afterward. Maltese: Live music. 9PM. Park Avenue Pub: Live music with Max Minardi. 6:30-9PM. Quackers: Live DJ. 8:30PM-1AM. No cover. Tackle Box: Live music with Hot Flash. 9PM. Towne Lounge: Live music with Traxler - Folk Americana I Clas­sic Rock. 8-lOPM.

28 SUNDAY Cafe Coda: Katie Kelley Memo­rial Show: Candy Apple, Aubrey Debauchery, The Pushers, Lisa Marie, Zabaleen, Lisa Valentine, Bob Howard, Evan & YJ. 5-8PM. Crazy Horse Saloon: Sunday Fun day. LaSalle's: Karaoke. 8PM. Maltese: Live jazz with Bogg 4-7PM. Star Trek Trivia 8PM. Panamas: Noche Latina 7-llpm Live DJ on the back patio The Tackle Box: Karaoke with DJ Shelley. 8PM.

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FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

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APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 ts I

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Things To Believe Until Your Skin Clears Up I read Ayn Rand when I was in high school...and I liked her. If you haven't read much, liking Ayn Rand is possible. The flatfooted prose, the dimness of her imagi­nation, the thinness of her characters, and the plots which all so obviously push her agenda are not likely to alienate a kid who has read little and experienced less. And, if you grow into adulthood shielded from the world, cocooned by enough privilege to spare you exposure to less favored people, you'll also be spared compassion for others. You can then join guys like Congressman Paul Ryan who divide people into Rand catego­ries-the bold capitalist doers, and the rest of us parasites who drain away so much of what Rand heroes like John Galt or Howard Roark contribute to the world. These are heroic individual­ists, self-reliant and entrepre-neurial, natural aristocrats burdened by those whiny hordes who want govern-ment to attend to every need. The Rand/ Ryan world is divided into Godlike human creatures like Donald Trump, and worthless socialist n'er-do-wells like Barack Obama. It's a simpleton's blueprint. In Ayn Rand's books we're only responsible for 01' Number One, so it's easy to see how such a philoso­phy would appeal to twerpy teens.

The same is true of the thin ideas found in On the Road, that other artifact of the literary 1950s. Kerouac, too, offers balm to adolescents who fear the onset of adult responsibility, telling his hordes of young readers that all they need do is to run for

it, to hit the road whenever respon­sibility (or clinging women) start to impinge on their freedom. There's another bitch down the road; there's weed, whites, and wine, and a guy at the wheel who's really good at con -ning freebies, so take the ride and you might outrun growing up, at least until you hit your 40s and alcohol­ism kills you after you've returned home where your mommy can take care of you while you drink yourself to death. Of course that last part ain't in Kerouac's book, nor is the fact that this King of the Road never learned to drive.

These books might appeal when your voice is changing, and you're hoping

the Clearasil will kick in before prom night. If, however, you're still clinging to either of them as a guide to living after you attain the age where you have to shave every day, the chances are you're lacking something essen -tial in both the heart and the head.

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

synthesis

STREET STYLE

What do you do for a living?

I am a wine/beer buyer for Whole Foods

Market in San Francisco.

Favorite thing to do in Chico?

The Saturday morning farmer's market.

Favorite place to eat?

Gordo's 8th Street taco truck. Veggie Burritos

with extra hot sauce are unreal!

Favorite activity in Chico?

A few times a year I get out to Salmon Hole

for a swim, although my girlfriend's mom

has been getting us a bunch of passes to

would be a close second. The best Women's

Club event had to be the Silent Film Night

with live ragtime piano to accompany the

films.

Sweet or salty?

Most definitely salty! Moreover, fresh

veggies! I never was much for sweets,

although once in a while I get a craving

for chocolate cake.

by Jen Cartier

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Affordable menus. Exceptional taste. We can't wait to serve you!

Eat. Drink. Be Merry. Locally.

phone: 530.222.4895 facebook.com/blushcatering

APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 11 I

CHECK IT OUT! If you see yourself

pictured here you can tag your photo on our Life In

Chico Facebook page!

f acebook.com/chicoca

18 APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013

I CAUGHT UP WITH the tentatively named Bunnymilk on a balmy Friday afternoon at Melody Records. The band (as of now) is comprised of Lisa Marie (guitar) and Kelly Brown (banjo), a pair of humble chickadees armed with ethereal harmonies and coupled with a penchant for the irrever­ent. With their eyes fixed on the horizon, they look to develop their sound from clear acoustic beauty to a grungier, messier, lo-fi approach exemplifying how they pres-ently identify themselves. Consider yourself lucky to witness these kindred spirits' sonic consecrations. After a nine-month hiatus (Brown was on a nationwide bike tour), they're playing a string of shows and capping them off with a headlining set at Cafe Coda this Thursday, April 25th. Better come out lest there be another nine months twixt perfor­mances.

You've described yourself as two drunken songbird angels. KB: That came about from when we first started playing together. It was at Origami Lounge and we were in the back of a friend's truck at the Spindrift show. We were just jam­ming out and a bunch of drunken bros were around us and said, "You guys sound like aaaaangells:'

What birds? What drinks? LM: Well, I drink it all, and I don't like ani­mals so ... KB: Magpies? Mockingbirds? The most ironic of the birds. Someone at The Maltese said they wanted to make a custom cocktail called "The Bunnymilk:' LM: Like iced horchata and rum.

Influences? KB: Randy Newman, because he assumes

"'

these really wild personas. He has this won­derful narrative style where he's not afraid to fall into a character. LM: I'm kind of in the same boat, too. Harry Nilsson. That's why we wanna build on the theatrics of our music. Motown too, gospel harmonizing.

Are you planning on recording or releasing anything on hard copy? KB: I'd like to make a tape. LM: Yeah we're pretty into cassettes. KB: We don't record very well and we don't play live very well. We sound really good when it's just the two of us in my garage on our equipment and there's nobody else around. But we're usually really drunk when we do that, so I don't know if we sound better or we're too drunk to notice. LM: I don't think we sound bad, but as far as our recordings go they've been in kitchens so we're not able to lay tracks one by one. They've all been one take. KB: Right now we're just working on writing new songs because the original songs we wrote, we played for about a year and a half. LM: They were more simple, folky, and bro­ken down. Now we're building on songs. KB: We plugged in. We've got an omnich­ord and loop pedals and a kick drum. The dynamics are totally different now.

Tour plans? KB: No, work. LM: I'm going to kidnap her.

Bear witness to the dark and delightful sounds

of Bunnymilk this Thursday at Cafe Coda

along with solo sets by locals, Ernesto Alvarado

and Adam Scarborough. The show starts at

SPM, costs $5, and welcomes all ages.

words by David Neuschatz · photo by Jonathan Huffman

SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

Tera Melos' debut self-titled album, released some seven-odd years ago, totally changed the music game; at least, for my roommates and I it did. "Math Rock" and "Experimental" became household terms, and we discovered other strange musical projects like The Dillinger Escape Plan and Melt Banana. The Sacramento-based band just released their latest LP, X'ed Out, last Tuesday and it's proving to be one of their least experimental, but most digestible, musical efforts to date. I talked to their bass­ist, Nathan Latona, about what went into making this slightly strange, totally lovable creation.

How does the title Xed Out apply to the music on this new record? When we were writing this record, we didn't overanalyze or overthink parts. There wasn't a lot of muscle-flexing. We knew there was potential with this record that audiences would "X us out:' Like they would go, "Oh. They went in a direction I didn't like. Too simple:' It's like that when you put out any record. If you go into anything looking for just one specific aspect, you might not understand this record.

Pick a song off this album you care a lot about. I'll go with the song called "Bite:' That song's interesting because it's one of the more minimal songs on there. It plays with some cool contrasting ideas. I always thought of it as a dark-sounding song. We just did a video for it, and it came out really bright and happy. I thought it was strange, for how dark it was, and the other guys thought I was strange because of how happy they felt "Bite" was. You know, 'cause of the twinkly

by Howl

guitar stuff going on. Now I see the brighter parts in there; I think it's a really cool song with its contrasts.

Tell me about "Until Lufthansa:' Well, it's one of my favorite songs on the album ...

Yeah! I mention it because the first time I heard it, I got a big smile on my face the entire five minutes. The second time I heard it, some time had gone by, and it made me teary-eyed. The hook was that good.

Cool compliment from someone that's into metal. There's something about that song that sounds really joyful, an overwhelming happiness feeling. Getting teary-eyed seems like a natural reaction to it.

What was it like writing "Lufthansa"? It was a really positive, fun thing; it came together really easily. I don't wanna say what you always hear: "Oh it just wrote itself!" But it was that kind of feeling. The last record we were coming out of losing our old drummer and writing with our new­at-the-time drummer. We were making it a big thing that we might lose fans with the drummer change. We had a bit to prove. It was a bit more dramatic. "Lufthansa;' and this whole album, it was more light and fun.

Tera Melos is currently touring the nation,

but will arrive at the Bottom of the Hill in

San Francisco on Saturday, May 25th. Also,

make sure to check out the brand new music video for the single, "Bite" (Latona's favorite

song), on YouTube.

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

PHOTOS BY JESSICA SID ON THE TOWN r·

APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 19

HOWL howl@synthesis.net

Tiny Pyramids & (WANING) I couldn't help but notice two amazing shows happening on the same night this week. On Saturday, April 27th, Sorin is headlining a dark, metallic, heavy show at Dex Records, while French Reform is headlining a bright, colorful, dancy show at 1078.

The reason this is interesting is two-fold: the melodic doom band (WANING) opening for Sorin, and the nu-wave dance band Tiny Pyramids opening for French Reform.

(WANING) is a band whose sound is anything but waning. The music is mountainous, oceanic, sweeping; sometimes it's melodic, sometimes crushingly dissonant. I like them because they're slow and doomy, but they don't drone for mind-numbing lengths of time like Electric Wizard. The pace moves with an understated majesty, appealing to deeper parts of the human psyche. When I asked why they chose their largely experimental genre of music, they had this to say:

"All of us grew up on different musical styles, and none of us have ever been able to accept the easy way when it came to musical tastes. Susan and Jim started the band as an ambient

20 APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013

duo and when that became too limiting, the music that naturally came was slower, doom-y music. Our power has increased by leaps and bounds. We're not even that doom-y all the time anymore:'

Tiny Pyramids hails from Santa Rosa, and it shows in their fun, very bright, music. When perusing their SoundCloud, "Problem" was a standout track for me. Wall-of-sound synths and processed drums made a great background for strange, eccentric vocals that really caught me.

You're about to go on a mini-tour with French Reform. How'd you guys get together? Tiny P's: I'm from Red Bluff, as is Phil Anker, the keyboardist and guitar player for French Reform, so we've kept in contact. Both our bands kind of hit our respective scenes at the same time and our sounds, though different, are compatible. The same type of music influences us, so we always thought it would be cool to play together. Also, I lived in Chico for three years prior to moving to Santa Rosa, so I'll always say yes to coming back for a visit.

Why should Chico go to your show April 27th and not the other one? Tiny P's: I used to live in Chico, so it's like an old friend coming home to party with you. And it's guaranteed dancing.

Why should Chico go to your show April 27th and not the other one? (WANING): The citizens of Chico need drug music other than reggae.

Howl is a biweekly arts primer devoted to

uncovering and supporting artists, musicians,

and performers who have new works coming

to light. Send me an e-mail, and you'll get

coverage.

Image source: tumblr.com/ tagged!pyramids

W !le-q<et Wal1 er It isn' t often you meet someone who is internationally recognized, yet remarkably unknown. Seth Walker has spent the last five years performing poetry nationwide. He sat down with the Synthesis to talk shop about his latest tour and upcoming stop through Chico.

You're the fourth top slam poet in the world. How did you get this title? So what happens is there 's this thing called the Individual World Poetry Slam and it 's actually an international competition. I was the top poet in Denver, and when I took fourth place I was representing Denver, CO. This year there was 87 or so poets, and the top 12 go on to the final stage. I made it to the final four.

So it's not like Afro Samurai, where you have to kill whoever has the first, second, and third place headbands? Oh no, I actually broke the fifth place poet 's legs. They weren' t able to compete and that 's how I got into the final round.

It's good to know there's still some dirty tricks involved to get the to top, even in the poetry world. What separates this tour from others you've done? During my last tour I was on the road for five calendar years. It was maddening to say the least, but I wouldn' t take any of it back. Now I'm trying to switch into a different phase of touring. Just go out for a

by Tommy Diestel

few months, then come back home and try

to maintain a bit of sanity, which is really nice . Even though I've been out traveling,

it 's really nice knowing that this tour will end. I know where and when it will end and I'll even have a home to go back to.

Why call this the "I Love Haters Tour"? All throughout history there have been haters. If it doesn' t have controversy, it doesn't have longevity. Whether you're thinking of philosophers,

or scientists, the ones that broke through had as much hate mail as fan mail. Really, every good idea is rejected before it is accepted. All of us have had things in our careers where people gave us shit about the political stance we took, or the way we expressed ourselves.

Who are your new partners in crime you're traveling with? Jordan Rant and Patrick Ohslund are two amazing guys! The I Love Haters Tour is going to be so great because it has a great mix of personalities. They'll get poetry, comedy, varying degrees of facial hair ... everything you would want out of an entertainment show! You won't have a bad time. Promise!

Don 't miss the I Love Haters Tour f eaturing Seth Walker, Jordan Ranft, and Patrick Ohslund next Monday, April 29th at Cafe Flo. Open Mic Poetry starts at 7PM, costs $3, and welcomes all ages.

SYN TH ESISWE EKLY.COM

Back To The Drawing Board by Kenny "Squints" Kelly

The Synthesizers got back to their losing ways last week, dropping a game to the heavily intoxicated Mista Meaners 2.

We had a few moments of glory snatched away from us throughout the game. Pat Hull, AKA "Nuke Laloosh;' turned an unassisted double play that gave the ump ver­tigo, causing him to only be award­ed a single out for the outstanding play. Then, later in the game with the bases loaded, I scorched a line

drive right into the defense to end the inning.

We're halfway through the season with a 1-3 record and things are looking pretty bleak. But we have to remember, the halfway point is always the darkest moment. How did Empire Strikes Back end? Bad. How did Two Towers end? Bad.

We may feel like we're frozen in carbonite, but this week. .. this one's for Frodo.

Reutews-Zombie Outlaw Benny Jordan/Brian Apodaca

by Tommy Diestel

From the moment I first picked up a copy of Zombie Outlaw, I was sold. The Bubba Ho-Tep-esque combination of cowboy outlaw western and undead zombie attack is right up my alley. The plot is straightforward, without a whole lot of ch1mky backstory to gum up a simplistic formula (zombie +western+ endowed woman= comic book gold).

A love-struck nerd helps his charming resident adviser unknowingly release the curse of an undead outlaw on their college campus. Simple enough to get the point across without dragging on, yet still mysterious enough to leave room for development in future issues. The back and forth between hyper-cartoonish line art and more detailed horror-art style helps keep the comic visually interesting as well. Posters and signs in the background hold witty captions to reward those who spend the extra time to appreciate the little things. Such nuggets almost act as speed bumps to grab your attention, especially during fast-paced action sequences. Even in the thick of it all, take the time to really digest the artwork.

Between issues one and two, the art style becomes more refined, which the author notes at the beginning. Characters change, details become more prominent, female characters become more top-heavily proportioned, etc. With characters sporting massive Popeye forearms and women reminiscent of Normal St. Bar ads, Zombie Outlaw is blatantly ''.just for fun" from the start. Hopefully there will be more of this brand new comic in the future .

FACEBOOK.COM/CHICOCA • SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM

CROWDSOURC~

Dain Sandoval 72* is a per fectly acceptable office temp. You want us all wearing grass skirts and sipping umbrella drinks? On second thought .•.

Like · Reply · .:J 2 • 12 minutes ago

Betnany Johnson Y'all are wusses! It's perfect! !

Like · Reply · .:J 2 · 13 minutes ago

Katya Manges Face book screws up conversations 2kl3

Like · Reply · 9 minutes ago

Dain Sandoval whose arguments are deemed inva lid now? hrrrrm mmm?

Like · .:J l · 7 minutes ago

l write a re ply .• . I

Sara Calvosa If by cold you mean roasting to death in a room filled with hot breath. Otherwise. wear sweaters. It's easier to get warmer. but harder to cool off. Like • Reply · 11 minutes ago

Katya Manges Speak for yourself :P

Like · 8 minutes ago

Sara Calvosa I think it's general ly true that when it's hot outside , it's harder to cool off and when it 's cold outside, you can just put on more layers.

Like · 5 minutes ago

Katya Manges Except that it's a perfect 77 degrees outside xD

Like · 4 minutes ago

Sara Calvosa I'm for a sol id 72 degrees, nobody wants a Katyacicle.

Like · 2 minutes ago

Jwrite a reply .•.

Valerie Reddemann It's a freaki n iceberg.just sayin' ...

Like · Reply · 12 minutes ago

Tara Jonnson Wright We keep my house at a cris p 67 at all t imes up in the Arctic., soooo I'm good.

Like · Reply · 12 minutes ago

Katya Manges Therefor your argument is invalid.

Like · Reply · 12 minutes ago

" Katya Manges Bill Fish kin even agrees with me ..

Like • Reply · 12 minutes ago

Katny Barrett Br rrrrrrr, yeah!

Like · Reply · 13 minutes ago

Dain Sandoval Sh ut up Katya put on a11 effing sweater or eat some calzones.

Like · Reply · 14 minutes ago

Tanner Ellswonh Ulsh Get a sweater.

Like · Reply · 14 minutes ago

Michael a Warthen i m cold AND im wear ing a sweater.

Like • Reply · .:J 1 · 13 minutes ago

Jack Tyler War m in Paradise, Cal ifornia

Like · Reply · 12 minutes ago via mobile

Nolan Ford yep. bad day for sandals .

Like · Reply · 13 minutes ago

Dain Sandoval men shouldn't wear sandals.

Like · .:J l · 7 minutes ago

Nolan Ford not even jerusalem cru isers?

Like · 6 minutes aao

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APRIL 22 - APRIL 28, 2013 21 I

ARIES Be more organized and disci­

plined. Your future self will thank you. This is a highly cosmic week

with a full moon eclipse Thursday

afternoon. The question about

what you owe others versus what

they owe you comes up. Your

libido is awakened to spring sights, smells, and tastes. You begin the

week inspired by new ideas and

opportunities. Be responsible for

your own personal growth. The

weekend looks good for travel,

higher learning, and exotic experi­

ences.

TAURUS I never thought I would see the

day where people that try to help

others could be put away for unpatriotic activity. Yet here we

are, and a strange love of rules

has taken over our compassion and common sense. This week,

restore common sense. Tolerance

and compassion cost less than ret­ribution. Seek reconciliation for

this is your true nature, Taurus.

The full moon brings partnership

and romance in the spotlight-an

eclipse of the most sensual sign

with the most sexual sign.

GEMINI You are in the dreamtime. I would

highly recommend laying low for the next four weeks. Any excesses

that you helped to create in the last

year will come to light. fm not say­

ing be anti-social, just don't go out

of your way to seek attention. The full moon rules your health, work­

ing with others, and charitable

causes. The sun in your twelfth

house indicates it's easy to be a

part of your own undoing. Help

others that are isolated and can't

get out, as in prisoners and hospi­

tal patients.

CANCER Move with ease and a sense of

freedom. You don't need to be as

responsible as you have in the last several weeks. Good friends keep

on showing up. Keep on allowing

them to help you. The full moon

eclipse is in your fifth house of

children, creative expression, and

love affairs. Take a new look at what you have to offer the world

Be proactive in preparing for the

future. The weekend looks good

for getting better organized and

working with others.

LEO You graduate from your advanced

experiences and head straight into career opportunities. Take

note of any talents and skills that

you have. Now is the time to use

them. Focus on things that make life beautiful, like gardening, cook­

ing, music, and art. The full moon

eclipse may have something to do

with your mother or an older fam­

ily member, as well as something

concerning your domestic situa­

tion. The weekend looks good for

having fun and being playful.

VIRGO Make every free moment in your

life be like an exotic coffee break.

Read something you wouldn't ordinarily read. Visit a place near

or far that you've never been to

before. Study a new religion or

visit a new house of worship. The

moon will be in Virgo Monday

for a most ecological earth day. Thursday's full moon could

inspire poetry, messages from

siblings and friends, and being a

part of your environment. You are

luckier than usual these days.

LIBRA A more intense kind of love is what you'll get. Real love involves a

little more give than take. Pleasure

that is not earned is seldom as

satisfying. The lunar eclipse taps

into your values. Free yourself of

expecting to be in control. This

could be a very sensual time. It's like you have everything to lose

and everything to gain at the same

time. Pay attention to your intu­

ition. The moon will be in Libra

Tuesday and Wednesday. It takes

effort to make things happen.

SCORPIO Mars is now in your seventh house

along with Venus and the sun. You

are very conscious as to the kind of lover and partner you are. You

are able to seduce people into see­

ing things your way. Your ability

to work with others is enhanced.

The full moon eclipse in Scorpio combines the sexual with the sen­sual, and the transcendent with

the material. Change and new

starts are part of the adventure.

The moon is in Scorpio Thursday

and Friday. Do something to bring

beauty and sweetness.

SAGITTARIUS It's time to get busy and be the best

at giving whatever service that you have to offer. Seek ways to improve

your personal health as well as the

health of the community that you

live in. The full moon will high­

light your personal karma as well as secrets you think you've been

able to keep from yourself and others. You'll be able to recover

nicely over the weekend with the

moon in Sagittarius. Many parties

and fun loving activities begin, yet

you need to work more.

CAPRICORN Don't give into the naysayers. You

are about to show the world that

you can be on top of your game. This week should have the motto "love what you do, and do what

you love:' Matters of the heart

such as lovers, children, and art are

easily found. Be more loving and

generous. The full moon eclipse emphasizes friends, older siblings

and people that are in power that

can help you. Monday could be

a very lucky day for some of you.

Smile more often.

AQUARIUS No one knows you like you know

yourself. It's easy to want to stay at home and live like a recluse

these days. Issues of home and

family are prominent. Help your

elders while they are still with us

that they may give a good report

about us on the other side. The full moon affects your career real­

ity. Your talents and skills will be

needed. There may be a tug of war

between career and family obliga­

tions. Tuesday and Wednesday are

good for gaining knowledge and for travel.

PISCES Being aware that we as individuals have an effect on the local envi­

ronment is part of being mature and responsible. Being aware of

how gossip can affect people in

a negative way is something you

may need to consider. News from

old friends and younger siblings

is likely. The full moon Thursday inspires travel, education, and

good fortune. Be at the right place

at the right time to make your

dreams come true. Refresh your

vision as to how life should be

lived

Koz McKev is on You Tube, on cable 11 BCTV, is heard on 90.lFM KZFR Chico, and also available by appointment for personal horoscopes. Call (530)891-5147 or e-mail kozmickev@sunset.net

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