Swap CEL- Read your partner’s essay.

1) Does it make sense? Yes/No/Don’t know2) Does the introduction have the 5 key points

Yes/No/Don’t know3) Do they use the words of the question in each

paragraph? Yes/No/Don’t know4) Is there a topic sentence at the start of each

paragraph? Yes/No/Don’t know?5) Is the essay technically accurate Yes/No/Don’t

know6) Have they used appropriate evidence?

Yes/No/Don’t know

Homework for Monday

• Learn poem

• Read over and highlight ‘War Photographer’ notes.

• Research topics for discursive essay.

Discursive essay – some ideas…

• Organ donation• Police corruption• Youth of today – ‘An Invisible Man’• Paralympics have changed the face of disability…• Paralympics – real Olympic values• The Royal family and publicity – (Harry and Catherine)• Anti Islam film and protests. Freedom of speech versus

respect/tolerance.• Facebook – Friend or Foe. (bullying, party/death…)

• Supported study on Monday will review ‘War Photographer’ work and finalise discursive essay.

‘War Photographer’ feedback

• Never use ‘you’ in essay. Keep it formal.• Never use abbreviations – etc, don’t, can’t• Always use capital letters and ‘ ’ for title.• A poet writes a poem not an author or a writer!• Topic sentences clearly say what a paragraph

will be about. Use them!• Never start or end a paragraph with a quotation.• Use : to introduce a quotation if it starts with a

capital letter.

Revise use of the apostrophe

• The poets use of rhyme scheme…• All the photos the photographer

developed..• Carol Ann Duffys use of setting• The five poets we have studied are• The plays main theme is…• There are four plays on the curriculum.• Carol Ann Duffys the poet laureate.

You must know

• There, their and they’re• Where, were and we’re• Your and you’re• To, two and too• How to list: The poet’s use of imagery,

tone, rhyme scheme and setting exposes the theme of war.

• The poet’s use of metaphor and onomatopoeia…

Topic sentences

Setting/contrast/theme

The use of contrast is very important because the setting shows two sides of the war photographer’s experience. On one hand the opening line states:…

Imagery

Duffy uses imagery to expose the contrast in the two worlds described in ‘War Photographer’. When we first meet him the photographer is described…

Tone

The unpredictable nature of war is reflected in the way the poet uses tone to show how quickly things can change. This is clear at the start of stanza three with the dramatic words ‘Something is happening’

Review your essay

• Take on board comments

• Take a highlighter and highlight your quotations.

• Have you used enough?

• Only highlight a quotation once.

• Look at how much analysis ollows your quotation.

• Is it enough?

Homework

• Groups of 4

• Number yourself 1 – 4

• Number 1 – oldest

• Number 4 – youngest.

Rewrite a paragraph each

• Number 1 – Setting• Number 2 – Form• Number 3 – Imagery• Number 4 – Tone

You must:1) Use topic sentence2) Refer to question3) Use appropriate quotations and analysis4) Contrast this with the opposite evidence in the poem

using In contrast, On the otherhand, Whereas…

Another way the poet uses contrast to develop the theme of war and its effects on the individual is through her use of form. When we first look at the poem we see that it is set out in 4 equal stanzas, each has 6 lines and an identical rhyme scheme (ABBCDD). This suggests that the poem has some order and is written in a controlled style. This sense of discipline is emphasised with the organisation in the darkroom, “spools of suffering set out in ordered rows” which highlights the ‘ordered’ nature of the protagonist. However, on closer inspection it is clear that the apparent order of the photographer’s life is an act. When we examine the form of the poem we realise this apparent order on the outside is contrasted with disorder on the inside. For example the final line of stanza 1 has four sentences ‘Belfast. Beirut. Phnom Penh. All flesh is grass.’ These short sentences reveal that life is short in these war zones. This is contrasted with longer sentences which cover 4 lines such as:

‘Home againto ordinary pain which simple weather can dispelto fields which don’t explode beneath the feetof running children in a nightmare heat.

This suggests to me that his time at home is long, tedious

and he seems to feel guilty that he can return to a safe place. This is important in developing the theme that we are fortunate if we are unaffected by war. The oxymoron of ‘ordinary pain’ suggests that he has witnessed real pain and this contrasts with what we consider to be pain at home. I believe that the poet’s use of a regular rhyme scheme contrasted with the enjambment represents the war photographer who appears to be very efficient on the outside but inside his thoughts are chaotic. This is clear as he develops his pictures, ‘his hands which did not tremble then though seem to now’ reveals that he is struggling to cope with what he has witnessed. This is further illustrated when Duffy reveals that:

‘A stranger’s features faintly start to twist before his eyes a half formed ghost.’

The use of the word ‘twist’ reveals this is an unpleasant experience and is painful for the photographer to witness. This is further enhanced by the image of the ‘ghost’ which develops the theme of the poem which is the fact that the impact of war is often psychological. Duffy uses contrast in the form of the poem to develop the theme that the photographer has been damaged by he experience of war despite the fact he is not a soldier.

Peer review

• In your groups number your paragraph – 1,2,3,4

• swap paragraphs

• 1 pass to 2, 2 pass to 3, 3 pass to 4, 4 pass to 1.

• You will pass each paragraph around until you are back with your own.

You must assess:• Is this a good topic sentence? Words of

question/what will be discussed.• If not – what is missing?• Is there a clear line of thought?• Is there appropriate evidence?• Are quotations set out properly?• Is there sufficient analysis?• Has the person stated WHY this technique

is important. Why has it been used.• Personal response.

Handouts

• You have a number of handouts from me to do with ‘War Photographer’. These are your notes and you must read and highlight key points.

• You must know this poem by heart.• Write notes about what it means to you and

have a clear idea of theme.• Theme – Different views of war. Contrast

between places of safety and war zones. The impact of war

Homework

• Write a plan and an introduction for the essays you have been given. Along with 2nd paragraph and a conclusion.

• Bring these next Wednesday so that we can discuss what you felt was easiest to do.

• Think about answering the question – so circle key words – and make sure you use evidence, analysis, words of the question and personal response.

• The harder I practice the luckier I get…• Research for discursive essay.

Discursive essay

• Should police officers be armed?

• The reputation of the police has undergone extremes in the past few years:

Ian ThomlinsonStephen LawrenceHillsboroughOlympicsMurdered PCs

Royal family privacy versus freedom of the press.