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L.YO!. 87i, No. I and enly

By Scribe C. A.President Howard Johnson was

- killed today walling across -the icecovering the C h a r 1 e s River. Atthis hour the exact cause of deathis not lnowm.

The body was found by FrankGleep '75, who was attempting tofind a leased telephone line be-tween the Computation Center andthe United States Department ofAgriculture, rumored D run alongthe bottom of the river. Gleep wasevasive a4bout why he was lookingfor the line, but police feel that heprobably wanted to make free longdistance caJls, and do not connecthim with Johnson's death.

JHt by nAPolice theorize that Johnson may

finally have been run down byUAP Boob Horvitz '68, whodumped his body in the river,. for-getting that it was frozen. Horvitzis currently under questioning bythe MDC police, who have jurisdic-tion in the river.

Meanwhile, reaction on campuswas mixed. DeanofStudents KenWholiegh '43 was much upset. Hefelt that Johnson's presence on theice was "a clear violation" of hisrule against walking across the iceduring the winter. When it waspointed out that Johnson may nothave been w'alking on the ice,Wholeigh admitted that in that

case the violation was outside theprerogatives of the Dean's ,Office,and suggested that a special Ins-comm subcommittee might bechosen to handle the problem ofpeople "who endanger thenselves

The Student Center libraryw;lI be open only to MITstudents bearing ID's fromtoday till January 26. Happyholidays! ':

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Student defermenfs have been abolished! LBJ gave the word to Mrs.Eleanor Lust, Selective Servitude Agent, yesterday morning in a special corn-

<munique.Alt1hough the emergency presidential order (#3.1416) has not yet been

: . reeaised to46 eg iub.>c, Mrs. Lust told The Daily Reamer that she wasinformed of the new ruling through secref Washington confacts.

While the R er's reporter attempted to shut her-Draft protest uP, she proclaimed this bit of information gathering to

be just a small part of her role of serving MIT andrf',:..:.!/:e I ri t keeping its undergraduates out of that "nasty, old

draft."as.....sulls burn 'D and belov President'

The text of the new ruling is as follows: "In order.......... .. dk.':. ,~ ~By L. Fidout to keep the peace in Southeast Asia, your dear and

Student response to LBJ's pro- beloved President has decided it will be necessary toposal for the abolition of T-S de- send more soldiers to aid the never-ending fight forferments.culinated in a massive truth, justice, and the South Vietnamese way. Con-c~'~ .:...'~:>: ~ ' :'' ::t..~.'-.' "F- rioting in the Chapel. Although the

presidential order was supposed t patible with the best interests of the nation. Threehave been top secret, word of the hundred of America's finest-of whom we are justifiably

- new draft order was leaked yes- proud-will be drafted this month to serve in Asia."~r~'g~t'"~.....~'3,~~.~.~~--'~.I'~terday afternoon by the Random While the official statement of the ruling did not

:ouse gr th a comment further, reliable sources in Arlington, Va.,House Revenger) in a copy-righted interpreted the statement. Firstly, by "three hundred

Tuesday, January 16, 1968 0 $ense article by Bennett Cerf '69. o Americ's fine1t" PmqiedPmnt Jahn w nre r.M- eringr

and others by runming on the iceor halls of the Institute."

Death protest$Sudent feelfig was so strong

that over 150 turned out to protestJohnson's death. Carrying signsreading "HWJ, where are you nowthat we really need Sloan," and"HWJ, DOA" they marchedsilently across campus led by ajanitor from the Physical Plantoffice to the Registrar's office inE-19. There, after a touchingchorus of "God save the Dean,"they demolished all the SecondTerm -registration materiql ithathad been turned in on time, andquietly dispersed.

By Bob BoyleThe Executive Committee of

Inscomm heard proposals from theStudent Committee on CampusMaturity on how to raise the gen-eral level of "Maturity among theMIT student body. Proposals werereceived last Sunday night at an,undisclosed meeting place.

The SCCM has recently beenformed as a part of the everspreading trend for self-evalu-ationand self-rectification on campus.Reactionary professors have oftenreferred to this trend as the"Crimson Purge."

At the meeting SCCM said thatthe MIT student is of irreproach-able intellect. His conceit levelwas also thought to be of properproportions, however as evidencedby certain hacks and gags -the stu-dents lack a certain degree ofsavoir-faire and worldliness.

SCCM was repulsed by FieldDay gimmicks and fraternitypjledging procedures. "Mir stu-dents need to take school andexams with a more stoical, coolattitude. After all there is a lotmore to life. Isn't there?": com-plained one SC-CM member.

The main proposal was that

IRag for saleWithin minutes after the, Rag

hit the newsstands, WBiTeS, theMIT radio station, further spreadthe word. Soon afterwards, arampaging fire-breathing mob ofnearly 15 students assembled inthe Lobby of Building 10. Thiscrowd, led by Dean Emmny Wick-ed, began chanting such nastiesas "Bring back the rI-S;" "Tip acanoe and LBJ, too;" and "Draftcoeds, not students."

YAAFAs the enflamed mob, leaving a

trail of damage behind it, flewdoxvm the sacred halls of theInstitute towards Mess Ave., acounter-demonstration was formedby members of Young Anti-Ameri-cans who don't give a damnabout Freedom. The YAAFers

(Please turn to Page 2)

stronger ties be created betweenstudent government and the stu-dent body. Thus such exemplaryorganizations as the IFC wouldbetter be able to promote a cam-pus Savoir-Faire.

Boob Horvitz '68 president ofInscomm said that the ideas werewell received. He thought thatthere was much that closer rela-tions with Inscm could do to

to men. but to batallions of un-

Canadian sojijeed bA

-for draft dodgBy Green Power

For the benefit ofwishing to flee to Canadathe draft, Techeical SbEntertain is cunductingflights north through .onagencies - Tek TravellService.

Seats will be given to test bidder. Normally, Tnot make a profit, but tIcy's manager figures hewhat money he can-- heCanada before the govfinds him.

instill greater maturitysponsibility among thebody.

The meeting lasted fronto 4 a.m. The S0CM femost of its propoWsa wilcepted in due time and tIbeen quiet in their attacllate. It seems that the Imeeting somehow mitigatcrusading f erir.

Photo by ICV

Executive*lnscomm meeting considers the weighty problemsof campus mafurify as brought up by SCCM. SCCM was im-pressed with inscoma seriousness. After the 9 hour meetingSCCM felt that it needed to revise its complaints.

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ward of 1000 men. This referenceto troops in terms of bataflions,rather than men, will be officialpolicy fron now on in order toplay down the extent of the co-flct.

........ 4enera More!andwestSecondly, these men will not be

students stationed in South Vietnam, asto avoid might be expected, but in North

uds who Vietnam. General Morelandwest,charter who is in charge of American

l of its operatims in Vietnam, was askedlers' dis- to comment on this change of

policy. He replied that it is thefeeling of the administation that

Lhe high- "the South Vietnamese have theean- same right of conquest and imn-

'he make perialismn that Americans have;Ul bae inconsequently, the fight for life,e1 be in liberty, and the pursut of filthy,ernmient rotten Communists will be ex-

tended beyond the old borders."General Morelandwest's eyesgleamed as he expressed the hopethat within the year this conflictmight be carried to China.

,Thirdly, an explanation wasgiven of the order of priority ofdeferment. This explanatin,craftily obtained from the deskand re-

student of deGenerate Hershey, GrandDragon of the Selective Servitude

n 7 p.m. Agency,'provides for the draftingeels that of delinquents, first; the draft-

ac- ing of Republicans, second; third,

hey have drafting of other anti-Ameri-;ks as of cans (such as, members of SDS,hnSCoM college professors, bearded stu-ted their dents, ultra-liberals, and mem-

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Many complain of the vagaries ofchance, yet few indeed are those whopossess the daring and imagination to-attempt to alter the course of destiny.I Endeed, a recent survey has shown that

>_ approximately ninety-five percent of theAmerican population is unlucky. Thecase is clear-cut - something must be

< done about the unluckiness of the Amer-ican nation, and it must be done quickly.

< We propose a positive solution to this: pressing dilemma.

Before attacking the problem, somenecessary information must be given. InDarwin's theory of evolution, it is statedthat if a trait and its opposite are presentin a species, that the trait that is mostconducive to survival will eventuallypredominate. However, if one trait

>- definitely produces life and the other,6 inescapably, death, the former'trait willQ become universal in the course of asingle generation.

Hence, we must make luckiness meanlife and lack of luck synonymous with

(Continued from Page 1)

hers of the Kennedy clan); fourth,all students majoring in scienceor engineering ('since they've been"getting away with murnder solong in avoiding the draft, thatthey should be even better in

Asia"); and fifth, other students.

Lust to AsiaMrs. Lust also explained that

she will be going to Vietnam alongwith, MIT's undergraduates.Hershey has sent her a draftcard, on which she received thespecial classification of I-A (de-linquent). Accompanying thedraft card was the followingletter:

Dear Eleanor,Your activities at MIT have

been deemed subversive. Thespecific charges levied againstyou incld'ide: (1) protecting sta-dents from the draft; (2) reveal-ing the secret regulations of theSelective Servitude Agency to st-dents so that they can avoidl thedraft legally; and (3) writing niceletters to local draft boards sothat they will grant student ap-peals for reclassificatiomn. Thus, Iam happy to send you a I-A(delinqnt) classifieaftion.

With love,Hersh, Gmad Dragon

Mob e 0 a

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stood in the way of the rampagingmob on the front steps at 77 MessAve., while their leader strodeforward and proclaimed, "Riot allthou wisheth, but thou shalt notdamage these steps; for they havebeen renovated by the MIT Lackof Planning Office. If thoushouldst damage them, tuitionshall bi raised once again."

On to ChapelHaving issued this warning, the

YAFFers joined the mob whichproceeded to the Chapel. The mobwas confronted at the C h a p e 1by the Irreligious Consuls. Theconsuls protested to the mob thatthe Chapel could not be used foranything but worship. One of theconsuls quoted from the will ofthe donor of the Chapel, U. N.

Where are you,Now That We Need You?

B.T.P.____________________________- -

death if we are to make inroads on theproblem. We can do this by having every-one flip a coin and try to get heartsThose who-succeed will be allowed to liveand those who, alas, get tails will bekilled. Thus, only the lucky people willsurvive.

Doing this will reduce the populationto one twentieth of its present size, butthat will not decrease the nation's worth.On the contrary, we will have a small,

lucky nation which will surly fare muchbetter in foreign affairs than we arepresently doing.

Afterthought: If this proposal is notaccepted, it will be just our luck.

The Daily ReamerChairman of the Board ................ Guilty CocksEditaur .............................. Michele Bedbug

Editaur.~~~~~Michelle BedbugMangling Editors ...... Thumb Thumb, Horny CornyBus'ybody ................................... GangreneNosy Editor ........................... Muck BreakerCreature Editor ..................... Mice N. VerminSpurts Editor .............................. Bony LayEntertainer .............................. J. B. DonutPornography Editor .................... Bull IngrownT.S. Editor ................................ Saint Nick

- Photo by On The Ball

Despite the new draft order, married students need notworry about being drafted. Take a close look at the- girl's-hands.(Heh! Heh!)

Godly '04: "The Chapel may only and sacrificed to the great Im-be used for purposes of worship,except after parietal hours, be-cause Techmen just don't getenough."

Parietal hoursSince it was still before parietal

hours, the rampagingmob seemedto be stymied After all, Techmennever break rules!). Fortunately,one of the mobsters had a thought.Immediately, a sacrificial altar

was built from rubbish (copies ofVooDoo). The consuls were placedupon the altar within the Chapel

perial Wizard in the Sky, by set-ting the Chapel afire.

Within two days, every fire de-

partnient (at $25/engine) in the

New England area was at the..scene of the crime. Although theyseemned to think something was

fishy, they were soon persuadedthat the chants of "South Viet-nam for the Chinese" with violinaccompaniment were part of aprayer to the weather gods forheat to melt the snow.

THE TECH critic recommends

DANTON'S DEATHKRESGE AUDITORIUM LITTLE THEATRE

WEDNESDAY THROUGH SATURDAY, 8:30 PoM.

Tickets $2.00; reservations accepted.

(Tickets $1.50 with this ad on Wednesday and Thursday)

y ice . Vermin '

30-3-47-536. General Lewis only hose checks made ou t 'ir Hershey wil be ai the Insi- cash or Kenneth Wadleigh wi ;,

ute from February 1-3 to re- be taken. Payment will no long-,ruit mercenaries for secret op- er be accepted in the Bursar's_

brations in an unknown South office, but rather all money .ast Asian nation codenamed must be deposited in a paper

fietnam. Originally scheduled bag in 7-133.'or this week, Hershey's visit 8%. The Coop is evaluating

vas changed to a "more op- a policy formulated by one of, )ortune time," upon advice its top strategists, in which the _ ,~rom SDS and CEWY. Accom- rebate would be changed to a ianying the General will be surcharge. Although initial rr.-,nits of the US Army and sponse from management was r

Marine Corps, principally the disbelief, proponents h a v a Sende,

'Screaming Tools" ,, the 101st shown that the program could oa,Airborne. work. Those who refused to pay aia tu.

32°F. Flusheed with success the surcharge would initiate a about pulling the wool over the second response. HandwrliiC. U. .eyes of fhat bulwarlc of journal- experts will be hired to forgeL

stfic integrity, the Boston Her- charge slips for those Cotop-aid Traveler, members of Baker members. Selective use of the

House are planning new and procedure this year has shown enlarged stunts. Although de- that the average tool cannot tails are lacking, it has leaked differentiate between real and

out that residents expect to phony charges. heelicit a State Department White -37/0. A national study of Paper as a response. Not to be college newspapers has namedoutdone, Burtonifes are confi- The Tech the country's second

dent that their stunt, now also m o s t absorbent newspaper.in the planning stages, will draw Number one was the Harvarda United Nations Peacekeeping Crimson, which was attested 2!Force. The tFC will outshine times more absorbent than MA

both these endeavors, if it suc- Kleenex tissues. Results were 1ceeds in convincing MIT frater- verified by the American Ken-nity men that a National- IFC nel Club.does exist, and that the joy 81/2. Another national col-filled romp through the red- lege survey on sex has come uplight disfrics of New York was with the result that MITers arereally a business trip. either sexually perverted or just

116- 36- 7399. The Institute don't know the story of thehas announced a change in birds and the bees. The survey-Registration Day procedures. ors were at a loss to explain theStudents will be unable to get answers to the question: "Didroll cards until their fees for you ever have VD?" Typical

second term are paid in ad- Tech responses included: "I buyvance. Also, checks will not be it every month,' "I wouldn'taccepted if made out to the lower myself to read that rag ."Bursar, as in the past. This year, and "Yuo, and I love it."

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in ex[pela m nval live burial ganfinBy psyche E. Delic not identify which part of her we

Approximately 100 first year should give the test to. She was Foupsychology students were em- discarded. The tests of the re- ployed in this experiment. They maining 98 students were success- urwere told that the experiment's fully scored. purpose was to determine "Physi- RESULTS: All 98 showed severe inological Correlates of Relaxation."' paranoid symptomrs. This was ke*They were all given a psychologi- manifested by the apparent re- thocal test. We then had 50 of the fusal of the subjects to answer any divstudents take the tranquilizers, of the test questions. They ap- paiwhich they were told would tend parently sank into a fit of deep eveto keep their pulse rate steady. depression which was accompanied toWe then started them memorizing by motionlessness. A str:ng putrid fnonsense syllables. One by one, odor was notieed, and we thus be- Sthey were suddenly bound and gag- lieve that we have noticed the GUvged and taken to the cemetery be- first evidence of a correlation be- Rvrfiehind the lab. Most of the subjects tween personality and olfactory 0ut~behaved beautiffflly. One subject status. Lfibroke his bonds, escaped, and ter- Conclusions: It was manfestly youtrorized three cities. He was dis- obvious that there was no real a carded. The remaining 99 subjects difference between tranquilized and'were successfully buried. Two and non-tranquilized subjects. We COUyears later, they were exhumed do feel we have found a new fac- incand given another personai+ty te.t tor, which we call burial, which ftOne subject broke into several appears to be an intermnenting eipieces at this point, and we could variable. m

I DON'T RN) EVE(1NG SEEM6 SO ROPFLES5.I'VE JUST FELT Do YOU FEEL CRA8,TO0? W4,t?

' ~ ' ¢CARi' EVERSIVCE WfNT ) COME 0VER?6E,6BRIN6GoNE ¥EAR WAN aER ALONe IF5 FEELS CRA6tq..

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By Ophena TiittClyde Box was a plain, whole-

some southern boy whose ambitionin life was to be a Grand Prixdriver. He was detoured on- theroad of life by his loving mother,who wanted him to be a Grand

'Prix violin player. A happymedium was struck (poor woman)when little Clyde entered MIT.To finance his meager education,Box -played his stalwart violineach evening at a local burlesquepalace. Here he met BananasO'Gratin, The Fastest Peeler inthe East. Bananas and Clydereally hit it off one night in theback of a TR 3. It was then thatClyde got the inspiration to taketo the pool halls, making moneyhustling suckers. Bananas madener-elf a little money . . well,that's another story.

4rstling proved not to be profit-able enough for Clyde, so he ktooto a life of crime. His most notableexploits included the armed rob-bery of Murray Eagerman's All-Night Bagel Factory, .stealing aGlenn's- Auto Repair Manual fromthe Burton House Library, andurinating on some of the mosthistoric institutions in New Eng-

MiT's first organ transplantis scheduled for late thisafternoon. Dr. I. M. Danger-ous of the Medical Depart-ment has been planning thisra Aical experiment for sever-al years.

When asked to comment onthis transplant, Dr. Dalger-3us explained that he did notforesee any difficulties and"there is only one concern -that there may be some lossof tonal quality, once theorgan has beenthe Chapel into

moved fromKresge."

land. Box struck fear into thehearts of his foes with shatteringsounds from his electric violin, ashe shouted, "Lick mah lizard!"

One day, while fleeing theCampus Police, the hood ofClyde's Jaguar sedan flew open atninety per, sriking him soundlyon the. crown. Said Box, "Well,french mah trench!" Due to the

ensuing brain damage, he wasforced to transfer to Pepsi-ColaJtlior College, in Pepsi-Coa,Florida; here he pursued the studyof his musical instrment. Hisexistence would have been idealif his girl, Bananas, had stayedwith him. Alas, she fled, scream-ing, "tere's just too muchviolins!"

Clyde Box maintains his cool as he knocks over a local res-taurant, the Flithy Spoon. In his top hand is his stiletto violin, inhis bottom hand the loot: a suitcase full of fried chicken a'dhominy grits.

-

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usme0ss odpmSter Services

2 0 Needham S+., Newton Upper Falls

y Batty M. BattyOpening Thursday at the Cherry

4 is Auntie Wartlog's latest exer-cise in psychological trauma,"'TheMaelstrom," a deeply movingstudy of a glass of water. Theseven-hour extravaganza is meant,in the words of its creator, to"embody the titillating evanes-cence of proletariat promiscuitywhile retaining and regaling -theoceanic inscrutablity f picledherring." Mr. Warthog's talentedcast is headed by a glass of water,and several expressive mates ofdust. The plot, an allegnOfy of eon-sidera ble pth on te .dichotromous

' .suti.t,'5 -d .w-orl.dly atin-,rets, e.maoys toruous ambigui-ties on its thematic assertion thatall existence is effluvial.

Helpless motesExquisitely detailed camera

work enables one to follow eachmote to inevitable oblivion in aravenous meniscus. The existentialfeeli.g iiduced by visions of help-less motes inexorably expiring ina liquid sea of death is difficult toconvey, as is the stupafyingdramatic intensity of motes intheir last -agonized mon .. ts abovethe watery common grave. The

I 334 days unhi|B~~B~~s~ U~~gI _

viewer is literally bolted to theedge of his seat for the entirety ofthis too-brief film, horrified, andyet, at the same time, enmapturedby the savagery before him.

Mr. Wairthog is understxod to beat work on a sequel to the presentproduction, tentatively entitled,"Athlete's Foot, the Story of aFunus."

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Molrals Slide For Bananas A~nd' Clydei

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he-same ;@e)K-K-K-Katy, Kenmore Sqluare,has a limited number of open-ings for male and female help.Waiters, dancers, etc. Many in-feresting benefits.

Call 536 1950-.Ask for Chip Johnson

THE CODONCORPORATIONspecial computer sysemr

Several.full and part-timepositions exist for:

realfime systems analysfsprogrammerscontrol sysfems engineers

Please call or write:

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in a surprise move, four coedsr' were erected to the top positionsc in the Athlec Atioc. The: new president, lMacy Caveslide

'00, said (when asked by a re-porter), "We've been working forequality in tfis organzatiton too

ce damn long. After a couple ofLU

years of getting nowhere, we de-cided to use the only recrsmeopen to us." Rumored irreegulari-

S ties in the camnpaignng werel qtickly denied by all concernedparties.L. NgIameless

I: WVoring under MiSS Caveslideover the affiairs of the AA for thecoming year will be three otherMcCormick-ites, who prefer to re-main unnamed. As one of them-put it, "Those rumors would havethe world beating a path to our

doors." (Ed. Note: KId yourself,girl.) However, be that as it may,the riaies will remain int.

When asked about new policiesfor the coming year, Miss Caveslide replied, "I don't intend tomake any drastic enes fromthe way things have been rum inthe past. HIowever,' a few n'nordletails will be correeteCI. First,the color of all towels in theshowers will be changed to amild pink, and. different deeter-gent will be used. Those scratchytoraels are too damn much. Asa climax, all teams will be re-quired to have at least one fe-male member." Miss Caveslidefailed to elaborate on this finalpoint, feeling it would be self-explanatory.

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Radcliffe captain Wilhelmina Jugz registers pleasure as shepins Bill Hairy '69 in the semifinals of the 130-pound class. Themeet was delayed for several minutes immediately following this. *. . I .1 I .

it took all three referees to separate the contestants.

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By the Happy Hunig y Five:Jotm Jolin John Paul

MIT blew Coldly Friday nightin oEckwell's Cage at the rateof 68-30. The opposition fell totheir knees before the OshkoshKid Bruce Legscratcher due to hisefficient method of putting it wherehe wants it. El rlash '69 easiywen the broad jump but was dis-qualified for refusing to let therest of the boys try their hands.

JO beat Jim's Leering to thewire in an energy sapping 1:19,sprinting for the last 70. The cDm-bination of Yankhis, Petre came,

across the wire, befor Hurnookidid. Sobare Tall easily captureda high herdel. The second finisherwas Balsles he dropped sonme-fthing while going over the secondherdel.

Jo-E1 Faubstein, wild-manneredstud, won he dash in 5.6, hisbest ever with Elly very close tohim. Coldy, acknowledging a highpercentage of seamen in the un-dergraduate body, did not evren MIT in a re-lay, The team willtackle Coldy again Saturday nightin a rematch of Friday's excitingg meat.

a92. ->

Photo by Joe Blows

"where if's at" inThe beavers con-match.

Tech captain Bill Hairy shows opponentquarterfinal round 'of the 97-pound contest.sidered this meet a warm-up for the Fire Island

By Greg BigastThe varsity swimmers captured

the first Hojo Memnorial Troph,

dent in the annual MIT Invitation-al Meet yesterday. The Beaversjust edged out Bates 69-6, withSpringboard College and RIPUndertakers finishing well back.

Larry Piston, veteran breast-stroker, scored in his specialityboth in and out of the pool, andIais Clark, Tech's only finwoman,who -impressively showed off herform in winning the backstroke,were instrumen ltf in leading theengineers to victory.

Captain Mario MacFarski, be-came the first person ever tosplash the ceiling, when hesturbled on his last dive andis reported to be recovering todayfailed to hit head first.

name in honor ofour late presi.

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easily handled by a squeezersquad from Harvard, finishingthrd -in the annual Wr-Harvard-Radcliffe triangular meet. Harvrdran away with the meet, finishingfar ahead of the other two squads,130-73-15 Harvard Coach John Har-

{vard attributed uhis team's suc-: cess to late-night practice sessions<in the Harw,_xd dorms. "Our

wresfiers ae so entheasiafc," hesaid '"that they came up with theidea of wrestling sessions in theirdcorm rooms after practice. The

.. Hvard Athletic Assocation hascomplied with their request to

. ron together, and now al ourwrestlers ate paired off in dormroms according to weight, haircolor, and blood type,"

Tech captain Bill Hairy '69 madethe best showing of the MITLwrestlers, advancing to the finals.In a close up-and-down match,Bill was narrowly defeated byRladcliffe snior WilhelminLa Jugz,4-3. Using the Navy ride, 'Turk'sride, and Saturday night ride, Billremained in control of his oppon-ent until the last minute of thematch, when Jugz reversed himto take the decision. Although Techcoach Wilf Chassis lodged a pro-test against Jugz' unorthodoxwrestling tactics, the referee over-ruled him, stating that only theuse of arms or legs on an oppon-ent constitutes a choke penalty."Jugz is legal," was the decision.

UTp-and-oming TeCl soph HansGroin was both up and coming atthe triangular. Though he lost hisfirst two matches to Cliffies, Hanswon his consolation matches totake 9th place in the unlimitedclass. Severely outweighed in allhis matches, "The Crtch" re-sorted to stal1ing tactics in someof his matches to pull it out at thelast moment.

Next week the wrestlers will1face their toughest competition ofthe season, the experienced Fire,Island College squad. Undefeatedin the last fifteen seasons,-the FICgrapplers should have little troublebeating off the young Tech squad.

Fireside rugbysweepin8g nation,top indoor sport

A new game is sweeping the,nation, game called FiresideRugby. A brief outline of the rulesis printed below.

lireside rugby is played on afield about 90 x 60 inches.- How-ever, as there are no referees inthis game, there are no actualout-of-bounds. There are twoplayers, each of which attemptsto push a ball over his goal(mnarked, by 2 champagne bottles)at either end of the blanket. Scor-ing in this manner is unimportant,however, as a great number ofbonus points are awarded forstyle of play by common consentof the participants themselves. Ofcourse, in this type of game,violent contact is unavoidable.Penalties are handed out in asimilar manner as bonus points,with the opposing player callingany foul he (or she) does notcate for. As in fegular ruby, thereare no extra point attempts.

Variations of this sport aremany and varied, but the aboverules generally hold true. No t e:this winter is the ideal season forthis exciting new indoor sport.

"Suck Malarkey-Back McCARTHY"

Member tag $1.COLLEGIlANS FOR McCARTHY

Box 4005, Ulniversity- SttioMinneapelis, Miinn.

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