star wars nursery rhymes

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A collection of classic nursery rhymes and songs, retooled for the Star Wars universe. I hope you find it funny.

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Page 1: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes
Page 2: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Star Wars Nursery Rhymes by B.J. Martino No rights reserved. I’m sorry in advance.

Page 3: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Twinkle, twinkle, Alderaan How I wonder where you’ve gone. A million voices I heard cry, Now there’s nothing in the sky. Twinkle, twinkle, Alderaan, How I wonder where you’ve gone.

Page 4: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Old gangster Jabba Took his pal Boba To fetch the Sarlacc a treat. But down at The Pit Luke’s plan was a hit, And so the Fett became meat.

Page 5: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

This little Gamorrean guarded the sail barge.

This little Gamorrean stayed home.

This little Gamorrean had roast Fug.

This little Gamorrean had none.

And this little Gamorrean…

… cried “Wee, wee, wee!” and was eaten alive.

Page 6: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Little Han Solo Rode in the Hoth snow To save a young Jedi. He slit the beast’s tum, Stuffed Luke with aplomb, And said, “I thought they smelled bad outside!”

Star Wars Tauntaun Sleeping Bag A real thing for sale at ThinkGeek.com

Page 7: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes
Page 8: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Leia ‘n’ Luke, almost puked Down in the garbage compacter. Chewie fell, bother the smell, And Han came tumbling after.

Death Star User’s Manual Appendix XXVII A Visual Guide to Garbage Mashers on the Detention Level

Page 9: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Fly, fly, fly your ship

Through the asteroids.

The odds are stacked against you, but

Don’t listen to the droids.

Page 10: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

For want of a resistor the motherboard was lost. For want of a motherboard the computer was lost. For want of a computer the exhaust port shield was lost. For want of an exhaust port shield the Death Star was lost. For want of a Death Star the Empire was lost. And all for the want of a resistor.

Page 11: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Old Ackbar was a seasoned attacker. Who kind of got a bad rap. He called for retreat from his mobile seat, But at least recognized "It's a trap!"

The itsy bitsy Yoda raised up the fighter craft. "I don't believe it," said Luke, sounding daft. Up looked the Master, at this awkward male, And said with all sincerity, "That is why you fail."

Yoda and Ackbar crochet patterns available at: http://www.etsy.com/listing/60880134/ackbar-and-yoda-amigurumi-and-clothes

Page 12: Star Wars Nursery Rhymes

Written and Directed by

B.J. MARTINO

Starring (in order of appearance)

TWINKLE, TWINKLE, LITTLE STAR

MOTHER HUBBARD

THIS LITTLE PIGGY

LITTLE JACK HORNER

ROCK-A-BYE BABY

JACK AND JILL

ROW, ROW, ROW YOUR BOAT

FOR WANT OF A NAIL

THE ITSY BITSY SPIDER

OLD KING COLE