December 2017

SIGNAL NEWS

CERTA

CITO

Seasonal Greetings

To all members

and your families

Official Journal of the Royal

Australian Signals Association (Tas)

2.

SIGNAL NEWS

December 2017

PATRON: G.GARD OAM. BEM

ASSOCIATION DIARY

President

LT COL.Owen C Winter OAM RFD ED (RL) “Victoria Mews”, 11/12 Bay Road

Lindisfarne 7015

(03) 62 43 9747

oswinter@bigpond.com

Vice Presidents

Mel N Cooper Ray A Woolley

Secretary

R J (Dick) Goodwin ADEM (Tas)

102 Wells Parade

Blackmans Bay 7052

(03) 62 296124

dickieg19@hotmail.com

Treasurer

Mick F Farley 170 Molesworth Road

Molesworth 7140

(03) 62 612514

farleymicksue@hotmail.com

Committee

Dave Harcourt Greg Rawnsley

Denise Geeves

Geoff Gard OAM BEM (Life Mbr)

Hon Auditor

James Lyons

Signal News

Editor: Dick Goodwin

Signal News Distribution

March, June,

September & December

First Friday Functions 2018:-

Feb 2nd, Mar 2nd, Apr 6th, May 4th, Jun 1st,

Jul 6th , Aug 3rd , Sep 7th , Oct 5th , Nov 2nd

& Dec 7th.

End Summer Lunch:- Wed 7th

Mar 2018

Venue/timing TBA

Anzac Day:- Wed 25th

Apr 2018

Hobart March and Cenotaph Service – from

10.30am Meet at “Waratah” by 9.45am

.

Lunch back at Waratah Hotel at 12.30pm

.

Medals to be worn

Annual Luncheon:- Wed 13th

Jun 2018

Venue/timing TBA

Annual General Meeting (72nd

):-

Friday 5th

October 2018. 5

pm at RAAF Memorial Centre

Commemoration Day:-

Sunday 14th

Oct 2018 Service: 11.45

am.

at Anglesea Barracks Signals Memorial.

Medals to be worn

Lunch: RAAF Memorial Centre from

12.30pm.

Remembrance Day:-

Association Luncheon

Friday 9th

November 2018. Venue &

Timing TBA. Medals to be worn

Committee Meetings 2017:-

Mar 2nd

, Jun 1st , Sep 7

th & Nov 2

nd

at the RAAF Memorial Centre, at 3.15pm

Printed by the Hon. Will Hodgman MP.

Liberal Member for Franklin

A much appreciated Community Service

3.

From the President

Welcome to the final edition of Signal News for 2017. The years seem to pass too quickly for me. This has

been our busiest quarter for the year.

We started the quarter with our short AGM in October. Thank you for your confidence in allowing me to

continue as President (only nomination!). Denise Geeves was elected to the Committee at our AGM – our 1st lady

Committee member for many years. Good on you Denise!

We would again like another volunteer to join the Committee. A not very demanding task, so please step

forward.

This followed with our Reunion for the 30th Anniversary of the Disbandment of Signals units in Tasmania

starting with a Dinner on Sat., 14th Oct. The following day our Commemoration Day activities were part of the

Reunion. Our short Remembrance Service was held at the Signals Memorial at Anglesea Barracks despite the access

limitations currently operating. Our Padre Rev. David Lewis again did a sterling job with the short service and there

was a near record “roll-up” on that morning in beautiful spring sunshine.

We then adjourned for an excellent smorgasbord lunch at the RAAF Memorial Centre and a good day was had

by all. Thanks particularly to the ladies for their efforts in the catering clean up.

A very special thanks to the Committee members for the work they put in to make the reunion weekend the

success it was and an extra special thank you to Dick Goodwin for the massive amount of work, in all ways, to

everything, so that it all came together so well.

On the 10th of November we enjoyed our Remembrance Day Luncheon at the “Horseshoe Inn”,

Cambridge with yet another great roll-up. Thanks to David Harcourt for organising.

Welcome to our three new members in Ian Dobson, Ian Beadle and John Tomlinson – great to have you back in the

ranks of Signals gents!

All that is left for me this year is to thank you for your participation and to wish you all the best for the Festive

Season and look forward to a happy, healthy and prosperous 2018

and

I will see you on the FIRST FRIDAY in FEBRUARY.

Yours in Signals

Owen

Owen (left) responding to his Life

Membership Award with Mel

Cooper and Ray Woolley (who

acted as the presenters) at the RA

Sigs Commemorative Day Lunch,

15 Oct 2017

4.

THE GREAT ESCAPE

Untouched for almost seven

decades, the tunnel used in

the Great Escape has finally

been unearthed.

The 111-yard passage

nicknamed 'Harry' by Allied

prisoners was sealed by the

Germans after the audacious

break-out from the POW

camp Stalag Luft III in

western Poland. Despite huge

interest in the subject,

encouraged by the film

starring Steve McQueen, the

tunnel remained undisturbed over the decades because it was behind the Iron Curtain and the Soviet

authorities had no interest in its significance. But at last British archaeologists have excavated it, and

discovered its remarkable secrets. Many of the bed boards which had been joined together to stop it

collapsing were still in position.

And the ventilation shaft, ingeniously crafted from used powdered milk containers known as Klim Tins,

remained in working order. Scattered throughout the tunnel, which is 30ft below ground, were bits of old

metal buckets, hammers and crowbars which were used to hollow out the route. A total of 600 prisoners

worked on three tunnels at the same time. They were nicknamed ‘Tom’, ‘Dick’ and ‘Harry’ and were just

2 ft. square for most of their length.

Tunnel vision: A tunnel

reconstruction showing the trolley

system.

5.

The Great Escape (Cont.,)

It was on the night of March 24 and 25, 1944, that 76 Allied airmen escaped through ‘Harry’. Barely a

third of the 200 prisoners, many in fake German uniforms and civilian outfits and carrying false identity

papers, who were meant to slip away managed to leave before the alarm was raised when escapee number

77 was spotted. Only three made it back to Britain. Another 50 were executed by firing squad on the orders

of Adolf Hitler, who was furious after learning of the breach of security. Although the Hollywood movie

suggested otherwise, NO Americans were involved in the operation. Most were British, and the others

were from Canada, Poland, New Zealand, Australia, and South Africa. , (all tunnelers were personnel with

backgrounds in mining).

The site of the tunnel, recently excavated by British archaeologists.

The latest dig, over three weeks in August, located the entrance to ‘Harry’, which was originally concealed

under a stove in Hut 104. The team also found another tunnel, called ‘George’, whose exact position had

not been charted. It was never used as the 2,000 prisoners were forced to march to other camps as the Red

Army approached in January 1945.

Watching the excavation was Gordie King, 91, a RAF radio operator, who was 140th in line to use ‘Harry’

and therefore missed out. 'This brings back such bitter-sweet memories,' he said as he wiped away

tears. 'I'm amazed by what they've found”.

Bitter-sweet memories: Gordie King, 91, made an emotional return to Stalag Luft III.

6.

30th

ANNIVERSARY REUNION ‘WIND-UP’ 2017

Well it’s finally come and gone again with the 30th

Anniversary following Unit Disbandment Reunion

highlights being two days of fun and frivolity, balanced by a very well conducted Commemorative Service

at the RA Sigs Memorial Arch at Anglesea Barracks, led by the Association Chaplin; the Very Rev David

Lewis. A moving tribute compiled a decade ago by Life Member, John McDermott (unable to attend this

time) was delivered by Vice President, Mel Cooper.

There was again a solid attendance by interstate visitors and the locals. There were also 17 messages and

apologies from around the nation from those who could not make it this time.

The Dinner at Clarence Senior Citizen’s Club on the Saturday evening was well supported and a new

format included a roving microphone, carried by Ian Hosan which added some levity to the proceedings.

Mel Cooper recited the Ode. MC duties were shared between Mick Farley, Ian Hosan, Dick Goodwin and

Mel Cooper. They managed to keep “the show” moving and on time! Vice President Ray Woolley

presented the Loyal Toast, former Sqn OC and Trg Offr Owen Cook presented the toast to the Corps &

former SSM Ken Walsh presented the toast to the Squadron. The responders were Owen Winter and

another former Unit OC in Basil Apted.

Apologies & messages were received and read by Dick Goodwin from Kerrie (Claremont Tas), Matt (ACT)

and Jamie Collidge (On posting O’seas), John Druery, (Werribee Vic), Denis Brain (Yarraville Vic),

Frank Moore (Perth WA), Laura Hurd (Redbank Plains Qld), Chris Beauchamp (Toowoomba Qld), Peter

Duff (Huskisson NSW), Les & Helene Bourne (Clare SA), Simon Kelland (Killara NSW), Bob Muir

(Mooroolbark Vic), Peter McClean (Heidelberg Heights Vic), Maurie McNarn (Qld), Paul Such (Victor

Harbor SA), Ian Beadle (Montrose) and an inspiring message was received from the last Trg Offr; Mike

Mitchelmore (ACT).

There was an even greater attendance at the Sunday Commemorative Service at Anglesea Barracks

(Signals Memorial) and the excellent smorgasbord luncheon which followed included a surprise

presentation when a Life Membership badge and certificate was made to President Owen Winter by our

two Vice Presidents, Ray Woolley and Mel Cooper.

Dave Harcourt and Greg Rawnsley were the Bar Managers at the RAAF Centre for the lunch and did a

sterling job. Dave and Lindsay McCarthy again looked after the photography.

Visitors to the State were Owen and Margaret Cook (Canberra) (Owen was again reminded of his radio

aerial erection demo skills and presented with a large steel nut on a long hank of string as a memento – we

understand he took it home too!), Graeme Boscoe (Bendigo Vic) and Caroline Button (Williams Landing

Vic). Brian Watson (Launceston) attended both functions and particularly enjoyed the Commemoration

service as did Northern colleague Lyn Chaplin.

David Harcourt and Lindsay McCarthy again had control of the video-taping and audio recordings for the

weekend. Denise Geeves and Ray Woolley efficiently acted as the “Reception Committee” at both

functions.

President Owen “led the push” with several inspiring speeches whilst the memorabilia display was again

prepared by Dick & Chris Goodwin.

ABC’s Radio “Sunday” program covered the Reunion with interviews of the Secretary and later Owen

Winter.

Fittingly, the Sunday luncheon was rounded off by the presentation of Life Membership to President Owen

who has provided well over 20 years of leadership to the Association in Tasmania (he was “speechless”).

7.

SOME REUNION WEEKEND PIC’s

Chief Manager, (Bar, Sound and Visuals recording) Dave Harcourt,

relaxes at the RAAF Centre after a busy few weeks organizing

Tis I , “Le Clere” - Back from a very near miss!! (After easily

breaking Ray Woolley’s “being

horizontal”record with a 2-3 month stay

‘on his back’, in various hospitals, Geeves

returned triumphant!)

Anne & Mel Cooper, Graeme Boscoe, Ken Walsh, Ken Moy,

Bruce & Jill Berwick,Margaret and Owen Cook and Basil

Apted chat prior to the entrée’

8.

MORE PIC’S OF THE 30TH

ANNIVERSARY REUNION

(L-R): Bruce Berwick, Dennis Keats, Dennis Hill, Ken Walsh, Mick Farley, Basil Apted & Dick Goodwin. Front: Anne

Cooper, Bev Andrews, Chris Goodwin, Bob & Denise Geeves soaking up the sunshine at the Commem Service

A broader view of attendees at Luncheon – foreground (L-R): Cliff Auton, Dennis Hill, Padre David Lewis (backs to

camera), (standing) Dennis Keats (going for another helping!), Ken Walsh & Ken Moy

9.

NEW BATHROOM LEGISLATION IMMINENT?

Could be the main subject in Canberra’s next Question Time!!!

There are important questions to be answered about recent LGBT bathroom legislation and whether transgender

people will be permitted to use a restroom of the gender that they "identify" with or be required to use the rest

room of their biological gender.

If the latter, will public rest rooms be required to have a Genital Inspection Station posted at the entrance to all

public rest rooms? Who will have to pay these Pecker Checkers, the people using the rest room, or the entity that

owns the rest room? And how much money will a Pecker Checker be paid to check peckers? Or, do we pay a

Pecker Checker by the number of peckers checked?

How many peckers can a Pecker Checker check if a Pecker Checker could check peckers?

What has this country come to when the Department of Labour has to create a new job description of Politically Correct Restroom Service Inspectors? Will Their Motto Be (?), "If you gotta pee - We gotta see!" (Geeves)

CORRECT WORDING

A lawyer, who had a wife and 12 children needed to move because his rental agreement was terminated by the owner who wanted to reoccupy the home. But he was having a lot of difficulty finding a new house. When he said, he had 12 children no one would rent a home to him because they felt that the children would destroy the house.

He couldn't say he had no children because he couldn't lie. We all know lawyers cannot and do not lie. So, he sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with their other 11 children and took the remaining one with him to see rental homes with the real estate agent.

He loved one of the homes and the price was right -- the agent asked: "How many children do you have? He answered: "Twelve." The agent asked, "Where are the others?"

The lawyer, with his best courtroom sad look answered “They're in the cemetery with their mother."

MORAL: It's not necessary to lie, one only has to choose the right words…

And - don't forget, most politicians are unfortunately lawyers. (Bob Gray)

AT THE RESTAURANT

A man and a woman were having a quiet, romantic dinner in a fine restaurant. They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.

The waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the woman slowly sliding down her chair, under the table and under the table cloth but the man stared straight ahead.

The waitress watched as the woman slid all the way down her chair and totally out of sight under the tablecloth. Still, the man stared straight ahead.

The waitress, thinking this behaviour a bit risqué and worried that it might offend other diners, went over to the table and, tactfully, began by saying to the man: “Pardon me, but I think your wife just slid under the table. The man calmly looked up at her and said: "No, she didn't, she just walked in. (Hodgy)

10.

MUSINGS FROM THE REMEMBRANCE DAY LUNCH – 2017

One member was telling Skip, when asked how he had got to the “Horseshoe”, that he had caught the

11.30a train from Kangaroo Bay to Sorell. Seemed that that he was late because there was a large bovine

animal disputing the train’s egress from the tunnel. Skip thought it was a load of bull.

De-ni(ece)se (de-nephew) has given away ‘E’ cigarettes. Must have found her lighter.

Basil was accompanied by his Delightful Daughter. DD didn’t seem to be able to get in too many words

edge-wise, despite her best efforts. Crossed my mind that most of us have had that problem at one time or

another in the presence of the redoubtable MAJ A.

MIA was the ‘hatted one’. Where WAS that magnificent black fedora?

Sue started out sitting next to Skip, but soon gave him the flick, skipped and sat somewhere else. Taste! I

guess she’d heard all the stories before.

Also noted John T delivering his memorable and carefully crafted and thought-out wit in the same straight

faced and deep vocal intonations and inflections as I remember them from a long time ago. Does the man

ever effect more than a half smile?

Bob G, when asked how he was, started to reply with his stock answer ‘F….. in the head’. Enquirer said

‘Don’t give me that crap – how are you?’ ‘Fine’ was the response. ‘That’s more like it’ was the re- joinder.

One member was re-calling that he had spent part of his honeymoon fishing at Triabunna, but didn’t even

catch crabs.

Bev as always looked after Ray’s every whim. Where DO you find women like that? And the same male

personage thoughtfully mopped up the slops and mess in another’s coffee-cup saucer – Goodw(u)n, Ray.

And later looked wistfully at half a dozen empty chairs at another table conveniently placed side by side.

PCM (Prominent Committee Member) sat next to, and took, Bob G home AGAIN. What’s going on

with those two?

And some-one else was going to have a health day – get p….d quick and go home early.

A wonderful day made even more ‘Remembrance’-able by its significance, by the fine food and by the finer

company. (Certa Cito)

WAITING HIS TURN

A man was riding on a full bus minding his own business when the gorgeous woman next to him started to breast-

feed her baby. The baby wouldn't take it so she said, "Come on sweetie, eat it all up or I'll have to give it to this nice

man next to us."

Five minutes later the baby was still not feeding, so she said, "Come on, honey. Take it or I'll give it to this nice man

here." A few minutes later the anxious man blurted out, "Come on kid. Make up your mind! I was supposed to get

off four stops ago!" (Bas McClymont)

11.

DINNER PIC’s

Three “Executive Committee”

members (Winter, Farley &

Goodwin)

-plotting another change to the

script!

Ben Baker and Dave Harcourt – before the dinner starts! Brian Watson, Caroline Button, “Marshy” & Mrs (Susanah)

swap pre-dinner tales

POOR OLE PETE

Mrs Peter Monaghan went into the newspaper office to place a notice in the Death columns in tomorrow’s paper. She

was told that it would cost $1.00 per word, but she had a problem as she only had $2.00 on her. As she was being

consoled by the office staff she devised the death notice.

It read, ‘Pete died.’ The newspaper man said he thought old Pete deserved a better notice than that and said he would

give her three more words at no cost.

Mrs Monaghan thanked him profusely and rewrote the obituary: “Pete died. Boat for sale.” (Geeves)

12.

A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR OUR SERVICE AT ANGLESEA BARRACKS, ETC

President Owen (Left) reads the Ode while Lindsay McCarthy records Mel Cooper reads JohnMcDermott’s

the audio and Padre David Lewis awaits his next part in the service moving Corps Tribute

All content above! L-R: Margaret &

Owen Cook, Padre David Lewis and

Basil Apted (in repose!)

Couple of reformed “grunts” chat over old times

L-R: John Tomlinson & Dennis “Sapper” Turner

All is in readiness for tonight’s “Beaumaris

13.

YOUR SECRETARY SAYS

Sad to recall the news of the sudden passing of former 124 Sig Sqn Tech Stmn in Neville “Nifty” Kirwan. Nev passed away in late September. He was the Stmn working with the member who became our iconic SQMS; John “The Pope” Paul and the late Barney Baxter in the mid ‘60’s. VALE Nev.

Great to see Ian Dobson, another of the “50’s Nasho guys” from 406 Sig Sqn join the Assn. Ian’s father-in- law was none other than out great cartographer, the late Phil Broughton, who many will recall produced the series of maps of the colonial semaphore comms system in South Tas (among many other projects). Phil was a DR in WW2 and a long term committeeman for RASA. Welcome Ian.

Also John Tomlinson, former Lcpl Radio Operator from 124 Sig Sqn who resides at Ridgeway. We are most pleased to see John “back in the fold”. And a special welcome back to Ian Beadle, former 124 Sig Sqn Radio Op and one time “Liney” who managed to escape the clutches of Albie Purcell and ‘defect’ to the Provost Corps before his work as a Police Inspector overtook his time for military service. Ian is another of our group of inveterate writers of Letters to the Editor. Good to have you back with us Ian and hope your health is improving. Hoping you, Dave Harcourt, Garry Gillies, Chris Speigel, Bob Gray and Keatsy (Dennis) can continue to keep us interested in civic affairs (or amused) for many years to come. Also great to see Keatsy join us for Commem Day service and lunch this year. We appreciated your attendance Den!

We don’t tell many tales about our members in this “rag” but this one had to ‘come-out’. Understand one former Capt/2IC, Admin Officer & RASA (Tas) Auditor, recently relocated to Bendigo Vic, incurred a navigational problem on the way home from the Reunion! GB’s GPS didn’t have the latest VicRoads mapping and as a consequence he was ‘lead up a garden path’ and endured some concerns before he arrived back home via a circuitous route. Well done Graeme – but it was great to see you in Tas again mate!

Speaking of legendary former members of the Sqn and RASA (Tas) folk, your Committee has agreed to try out a series of “feature articles” about the aforementioned people and would like some feedback in due course, please. Broadly, we are looking to tell the stories of those who have done extraordinary things in their careers or by way of community service. We have already targeted some who have made outstanding contributions in such fields as Emergency Services, the RSL, Law, Defence of the Nation, the Diplomatic Service, Sport, etc. The articles will take some effort to “rustle-up” so we can’t guarantee one each issue!

Calling our Visitors to Canberra - Any member wishing to attend the “Last Post” evening ceremony at the Australian War Memorial could lay a wreath on behalf of this Association but you should first check with the Memorial staff AND our Secretary as to the protocols that exist, please.

We have a recent addition to the regular “contributors ‘pool’. This writer ‘travels’ under the nom de plume of “Certa Cito” and no; it’s not the Victorian RASA guy! Some of his material is a bit ancient but most of our readership will be able to readily relate to those military offerings, whilst other material; is right up to date and sets out to stir up those members of today who can be vaguely identified in the content!! Enough said – look OUT for “Certa Cito” in this and future editions.

Not only have we had Tom Currie & Ken Walsh on the sick list but now Kenny Moy has gone on ‘sick parade’ too with a throat problem. From first advice, it’s understood Ken is to undergo treatment and his prognosis is good.

AND…. A Merry Christmas to you all!! (Dickie G.)

14.

ROYAL AUSTRALIAN SIGNALS ASSOCIATION (TAS) Statement of Receipts & Expenditure 1/8/2016- 31/7/2017

GENERAL ACCOUNT Receipts Expenditure

OPENING BALANCE $ 2,676.87 Postage $ 349.93

Subscriptions $ 1,390.00 Stationary $ 33.95

Bar Trading $ 1,607.45 Bar Stock $ 1,079.83

Wheel receipts $ 1,984.50 Prizes for Wheel $ 924.82

Memorial reservations $ 40.00 Memorial expenses $ 44.00

Donations received $ 535.00 Social subsidies $ 188.00

Bank/Investments Interest $ 535.82 Mobility subsidies $ 630.00

Transfers from Investment Acct $ 2,000.00 Donations made $ 0.00

Corps stock sales $ 356.95 Corps stock purchases $ 0.00

Voided/unpresented cheque $ 199.98 Accommodation rent $ 660.00 Meals, Anzac/Memorial $ 699.00 Meals, Anzac/Memorial $ 745.00

30th. Reunion Oct ’17 $ 65.00 Catering costs (1st. Fri) $ 229.59

Totals $12,090.57 Totals $ 4,885.12

Balance $ 7,205.45

Bank Balance 31/7/17 $ 7,205.45

M F FARLEY

Treasurer 31/7/2017

INVESTMENT ACCOUNTS

Mobility Support: Balance B’fwd from previous years $14,011.59 (Held in Perpetual Trustees)

Transfers this year $ 2,000.00

Balance to C’ fwd to next year $12,011.59 (Held in Perpetual Trustees)

Initial funds provided= $15,750+ Interest earned $1,798.51 less subsidies paid $3,436.11: Balance= $14,112.40 (Comprised of $12,011.59 held in Perpetual Trustees & $2,100.81 held in General Account) Memorial Account: Balance B’fwd from previous year $4,500.00

Transfers this year $ 0.00 Balance to C’fwd to next year $ 4,500.00

TRADING STOCK - on Hand

Bar $ 52.00

Corps Items $176.00 Tiesx2= $60 Badges x7= $56 Car Stickers= $60

Total $226.00

Certified correct in accordance with the books of account & documents presented for my inspection.

J LYONS, AUDITOR (30 Aug 17)

15.

COUPLE MORE REUNION PIC’s

Main course done! Above - (L-R) Denise Geeves, Chris Harcourt, Ian & Maxene Hosan, Sue Farley, Brian Watson,

Caroline Button and “The Marshes with Greg Rawnsley (in the background)

(L-R) Lindsay McCarthy, Virginia Turner, Anne Cooper, Graeme Boscoe (partly obscured), Ken

Walsh, Ken Moy, Bruce & Jill Berwick, Margaret & Owen Cook

16. A BIT MORE FROM THE REGULARS

THE BAPTIST WHITE LIE CAKE - Have you ever told a white lie?

Alice Grayson was to bake a cake for the Baptist Church Ladies' Group in Tuscaloosa, but forgot to do

it until the last minute. She remembered it the morning of the bake sale and after rummaging through cabinets,

found an angel food cake mix & quickly made it while drying her hair, dressing, and helping her son pack for

scout camp.

When she took the cake from the oven, the centre had dropped flat and the cake was horribly

disfigured and she exclaimed, "Oh dear, there is not time to bake another cake!" So, being inventive, she

looked around the house for something to build up the centre of the cake. She found it in the bathroom. A

roll of toilet paper.

She plunked it in and then covered it with icing. Not only did the finished product look beautiful,

it looked perfect and, before she left the house to drop the cake by the church and head for work, Alice woke

her daughter and gave her some money and specific instructions to be at the bake sale the moment it opened at

9:30 and to buy the cake and bring it home.

When the daughter arrived at the sale, she found the attractive, perfect cake had already been

sold. Amanda grabbed her cell phone and called her mom. Alice was horrified. She was beside herself!

Everyone would know! What would they think? She would be ostracized, talked about, ridiculed!

All night, Alice lay awake in bed thinking about people pointing fingers at her and talking about her

behind her back, so the next day, Alice promised herself she would try not to think about the cake. She would

attend the fancy luncheon/bridal shower at the home of a fellow church member and try to have a good time.

She did not really want to attend because the hostess was a snob who more than once had looked down her

nose at the fact that Alice was a single parent and not from the founding families of Tuscaloosa, but having

already RSVP'd, she couldn't think of a believable excuse to stay home.

The meal was elegant, the company was definitely upper crust old south and to Alice’s horror, the

cake in question was presented for desert! Alice felt the blood drain from her body when she saw the cake!

She started out of her chair to tell the hostess all about it, but before she could get to her feet, the Mayor's

wife said, "what a beautiful cake!"

Alice, still stunned, sat back in her chair when she heard the hostess (who was a prominent church

member) say; "Thank you, I baked it myself." Alice smiled and thought to herself, "God is good." (Geeves)

THE HORSE & THE CHOOK

A horse is stumbling home after a heavy night and falls into a pit. No matter how hard he tried he cannot get

out. He panics as he knows the farmer will be mad if he’s not there to plough the field tomorrow. Luckily a

chicken walks by and he cries to him, “Please, you’ve gotta help me out otherwise the farmer will take me to

the glue factory.”

“I can’t do it,” the chicken said, “You are far too big and heavy”. But then he has a good idea. He gets

the farmers Porsche, drives it over and throws a rope over the edge and drags the horse out.

A few days later the horse is coming home from the bar and hears cries from the hole. It is the chicken who

is drunk and clucking around aimlessly at the bottom. “Hey horse, you’ve gotta help me, as if I’m not home

to give the farmer eggs he will chop my head off.” He knows he owes the chicken a favour and is too big to

fit in the Porsche, so drops his long penis down the hole, the chicken grabs it and is hauled to safety.

The moral of the story is: If you’re hung like a horse; you don’t need a Porsche to pick up chicks. (Geeves)

(We know it’s a bit rude but we cut Geevesy a bit of slack sometimes!!)

Yeah I know – it’s a classic! Ed.

17.

ROYAL AUSTRALIAN SIGNALS ASSOCIATION (TAS)

INVITATION TO

APPLY FOR MEMBERSHIP

NAME (BLOCK LETTERS) ……………………………………………………….

POSTAL ADDRESS ………………………………………………………………..

…………………………………………POSTCODE……….

EMAIL ADDRESS (if available)…………………………………………………….

BRIEF DESCRIPTION OF MILITARY SERVICE …………………………………………….

…………………………………………………………………………………………

…………………………………………………………………………………………

SIGNATURE……………………………………DATE……………………………..

Post or Email to Association Treasurer: Mick (Skippy) FARLEY

170 Molesworth Rd, MOLESWORTH Tas 7140

OR email to:-farleymicksue@hotmail.com

Subscription - $5.00 per annum (includes 4 x editions of “Signal News” annually).

(Subs Payments : By Direct Deposit to our CBA Account, BSB 067-000, Account

No. 28033880; Add your surname when lodging on-line, OR by cheque, posted to Treasurer)

General Association Enquiries to:-

R J (Dick) Goodwin

Secretary, 102 Wells Parade,

BLACKMANS BAY TAS 7052

(Email: dickieg19@hotmail.com)

(May 2017)