Sharing is Caring -Kitchens, Recipes, and Family

By : Karen Everett Watson

Just a few generations ago, in the land that we call America, women spent many hours together cooking, sharing recipes, family stories – laughing and even, sometimes crying - together.

We made a lot of gains in this old world – women now feel free to work and be educated, but not all of the trade-offs are wonderful.

• Many of those home cooked meals, we once regularly enjoyed, have been replaced with fast food and restaurants.

• The food is not nearly as scrumptious or nutritious, but we’ve also lost that time in the kitchen where we learned about Great Aunt Sally’s stuffing recipe, figured out how to accomplish world peace, and mended many teenage daughters’ broken hearts.

• As the holidays approach, we all begin to think of the delicious recipes we’ve enjoyed over the years.

• Many are family originals, or at least, family-tweaked recipes that are beloved by the whole clan.

• For you, caregivers to older women, this time of year is the perfect time to get your loved one back into that kitchen, and pull those famous recipes from their minds, before time takes that away, too.

A few years ago, my own daughter-in-law asked me for my stuffing recipe.

• I was delighted. She told me that no other recipe would do, because Isaac wanted hers to taste just like mine. Since then, Jenny and I have made my “almost famous hot rolls” together and the family gathering favorite – Polenta and Stew.

• Whether or not the recipes are preserved, the memories we made working together in the kitchen will last my whole life through.

For older women, who spent many years preparing meals for their families, you could not give them a bigger compliment than to ask for the family recipes.

• But don’t cheat yourself, or them. Get them into the kitchen and you will discover the real secrets to their favorite dishes. • More than that, you will give them a sense of purpose. You’ll give each other memories to last forever.

Here are a few tips to perhaps try when you get your Momma or Granny, into the kitchen.

1. Make it an occasion – invite a younger family member to join in the fun.2. Get out the camera. Make your loved one the star of the kitchen and chronicle their recipes in photos.3. Take notes – Not only will you want to preserve the recipes, but the history behind the recipes.

4. Ask great questions while you cook and share – a. Momma, who taught you to cook? b. Do you remember the first time you made that dish? c. What was your favorite meal when you were a child? d. Did Daddy always like your cooking? e. Tell me about a meal that didn’t turn out? f. Where did you find your best recipes? g. What did your granny make for Sunday dinner?

Even if your loved one has dementia, they’ll know the answers to these questions. • Their long-term memory stays intact the longest. • You’ll find out things you never knew about your family, if you only ask!

Once you have those great recipes, and memories, share them withother family members through e-mail, snail mail or on your familywebsite.

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