Sacrament of

Marriage

HISTORICALBACKGROUND

• Second to Fifth Centuries–Marriage is viewed more and more as the

justification of the use of sex which has been infected by sin.

–The purpose of marriage is none other than the begetting of children.

–Indeed, our sexual desires are nothing more than the unfortunate effects of Original Sin.

–Marriage is a sacrament signifying on earth the future unity of God’s people in heaven.

• Middle Ages to Vatican II–In 1208, in the Profession of Faith

prescribed by Pope Innocent III, marriage was accounted a true sacrament.

–According to the Council of Trent, it required that Catholic marriages takes place in the presence of a priest, especially to limit the widespread practice of clandestine marriages.

• The word marriage may be taken to denote the action, contract, formality, or ceremony by which the conjugal union is formed or the union itself as an enduring condition.

• It is usually defined as the legitimate union between husband and wife.

Biblical Foundation

Love is the human vocation (and our first vocation)Only a human can love; other animals can respond instinctively or characteristically, but humans love. This reflects a special gift given to us for a reason.

Vocation (from Ln voco, vocare: to hear) means our response to an invitation to enter into a way of living. Vocation to love is manifest and lived out as: married, single, vowed religious, or celibate. But these are not ends in themselves, but particular manifestations of the general vocation to love.First vocation from the standpoint of power: love and the actions of love and compassion can do so much to change hearts and reform people. (Eg story from newspaper clipping)

Marriage is the symbol of God's love in our worldScripture 1 John 4:16. This sentiment of God has been poetically expressed describing God as 'love generating life': Good analogy. God's love is behind the generation of creation and life.Nature of love is to generate life. Three types of love as defined by the ancient philosopher Aristotle:

1. Pleasure: humor, or some other endearing quality2. Usefulness: You have a nice car; common interest, common purpose3. Good: based on the good in the other person.

Note: #1 & 2 are 'me' centered, #3 is directed to the other person.God's love is faithful: God's love abides even when we turn from God, and forgiving: ready to start over againThis is the model for Christian Marriage. This is seen in Eph 5:25, the comparison of Marriage with love of Christ for the Church. Marriage, in its best, seeks to live out the love of God, bearing witness to the love of God through the faithful abiding love of the spouses for each other.

Marriage reflects a covenant (not a contract)Sacrament of Marriage reflects this love of God, and involves inviting God into the relationship; to support/strengthen/protect the bond and the commitment.Reflects covenant between God and PeopleFaithful and forgivingContract spells out responsibilities and obligationsCovenant is built on love, commitment and service; hence the pledge '...in good times and in bad...'

Catholic marriage demands that we accept the challenge to be real.Catholic marriage is a sacrament; it images God's love, which is faithful, forgiving, and I might add, forever.Not just a show: no place to try to outdo a friend or relative's ceremony or flower arrangementsNot a celebration that lasts 45 minutes then is over, but the beginning of a new life (and a new way of living)

Not something that is done on your own but invites and includes God (and the community of believers to support you).If you are not ready: give yourself time this is a big serious commitmentIf not sincere and real: don't make a mockery of the Sacrament. Make other arrangements.

When God first created man and woman, he also established marriage and the family relationship on which every society is built through the ages. Genesis 2:18-25 provides the blueprint for a Biblical marriage relationship. It gives us clear guidelines to have fulfilling marriage relationships as God originally intended.

The first gift God gave man was the relationship with Himself. He created man with the ability and need to love someone. God is to be that first love and to fulfill the need.The second gift to man was the creation of a woman. This was very different from the first gift, but just as precious for him. Why did God give man this second gift? How was it special?

•Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14)

 Ephesians 5:28 says:So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself.•     Exclusivity in marriage relationship•     Permanence of the marriage relationship - "They will become one flesh."

Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her; that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; (Ephesians 5:22-28, NASB).

Marriage is a commitment to love! Love does not deal treacherously with others....especially not one's on wife or husband.

Romans 13:10 states God's first principle of love. "Love worked no ill to his neighbor: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law." Verse 9 says "Thy shall love thy neighbor as thyself."Galatians 5:14 "For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shall love thy neighbor as thyself."

Through HIS love

Two became ONE …

Marriage Ceremony

T he Rite of the Marriage

C onfirmation of the Marriage bond

B lessing of the Arrhae and the Rings

G iving of the Rings and the Arrhae

T he Offertory

T he Eucharistic Prayer

C ommunion rite

C oncluding rites

The Rite of Marriage

- The priest addresses the couple and the congregation.

• Allocution• Scrutiny• Exchange of Consent

Allocution and Scrutiny of the Bride and Groom

Exchange of Consents

The Bride and Groom join their right hands

Confirmation of the Marriage Bond

Blessing of the Arrhae and the Rings

- Ring, Coin and Bible bearers will come forward assisted by the Best Man and Matron of Honor and will stand at the right side of the priest

- The priest sprinkles the arrhae and the rings with holy water

Giving of the Rings and the Arrhae

- The priest takes the ring and gives it to the Bride and Groom.

- The Groom takes the arrhae in both hands. The Bride places her cupped hands under those of the Groom. He lets the arrhae fall into the hands of the Bride.

- The Bride places the arrhae on the tray

The Offertory- The male sponsor takes the cruets and gives them to the Groom. Likewise, the lady sponsor gives the chalice and the ciborium to the Bride. Then the Bride and Groom present them to the priest.

Eucharistic Prayer- The couple kneels. - Two candles are lit, one at the right and the other at the left

side of the couple. A white veil is laid over the head of the Bride and the shoulders of the Groom. Then, the cord in form of 8 is placed over the shoulders of the Bride and Groom

Communion Rite

* Our Lord’s Prayer * The Nuptial Blessing

* The Sign of Peace * The Breaking of the Bread

* Communion

- While the Choir sings the communion hymns, the priest gives communion to the newlyweds and then gives communion to everyone.

Concluding rites- The Bride, the Groom, the Priest and the Sponsors sign

the Marriage Contract.

- The Bride, the Bridegroom and their entourage march in procession out of the Church.

Symbols

The bride walks down the aisle with her father on the right and her mother on the left. Before reaching the altar, father kisses the bride and gives her hand to the groom who is waiting at the end of the aisle. After paying due respect to the bride’s parents, the couple will proceed to their special seats placed before the altar. This gesture signifies the handing over of the bride to the groom for the purpose of forming a new family.

Bridal ProcessionThe Gospel Mt. 25: 1-13 speaks out of the bridesmaids, who served as some kind of court to the bride, keeping her company while waiting for the groom. In Jn 3: 22-30 mentions that Best Man in the person of the Groom’s friend, whose duty was to protect the bride until she was united to her husband.

Wedding Gown and Veil

This symbolize purity and innocence. The trend of a long white gown was initiated by Queen Victoria in her wedding with Albert in 1840.

Traditionally, the veil was introduced to protect the bride from evil spirits, and to hide her face from the groom until after the ceremony.

Bouquet of FlowersThis symbolizes fertility and the start of a

new life. During medieval times, bouquets were used as a protection from evil spirits. After the wedding, the bouquet was burned inside the house to chase away the evil spirits, and the ashes tossed to the wind.

Nowadays, after the wedding reception, the bouquet is tossed to the maids to wish good luck for their future marriages.

Joining of HandsDuring the exchange of the

marriage consent, the couple join their hands, to say: “Grant us, O Lord, to be one heart and one soul from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part”

This signifies their total commitment to one another. The husband and wife belong to each other. They do become one in body, heart and purpose.

Wedding RingThis symbolizes the everlasting

love and fidelity of the couple. The circular shape represents their circle of love that has no beginning or end. These love and fidelity are proclaimed by married people who proudly wear their wedding rings all throughout their lives. It is in this spirit that the Church, when blessing the rings, pray that those “who wear them may ever live in mutual love and unbroken loyalty.”

The rings are placed on the ring-finger because it was believed that a vein runs directly from finger to the heart.

Arrhae or CoinsThe Arrhae or coins that the

groom place on the hands of the bride symbolize the sufficiency of material possessions that the husband should provide for the material needs of the family.

The Goom gives the arrhae to the Bride, saying: “I give you these arrhae as a pledge of my dedication to your welfare.”

This means that it is primarily the man’s duty to be the provider and the breadwinner of the family.

CandlesThe candles to be lighted on both sides of the couple symbolize the presence of Christ in their married life, as well as the union of their two families.

Marriage VeilThe veil placed on the bride’s

head and extended to the groom’s shoulder symbolizes that as Christ is the head of the Church so the husband is the head of the wife. It also emphasizes their union and mutual self-surrender.

By covering the bride’s head, it means that the bride reserves her beauty exclusively for her husband.

CordThe cord which is placed in an 8-shaped around the couple’s shoulders symbolizes that the responsibilities of married life should be carried together. It signifies the unity of marriage.

GarterThe garters were introduced as a symbol of modesty. Usually, there were of color blue in association to the Virgin Mary, and also in reference to an ancient nuptial rhyme, which said that every bride should wear: “Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue with a sixpence in your shoe.”

Nowadays, after the wedding, the bride will toss the garter to all the single men for good luck. The catcher then places the garter on the leg of the maid who caught the bouquet.

Wedding CakeThe wedding cake is a

custom inherited from ancient Romans and symbolizes prosperity and fortune. Originally, it was made of seeds and grains to signify fertility.

Wedding DovesThe white doves set free during the wedding are symbols of purity and innocence, as well as a sign of peace being announced to the whole world.

Values

The teaching of the Church on individual moral norms can only be appreciated and followed if Christian Marriage is truly understood for what it really is.

Only if Christian Marriage is recognized as part of “a new covenant, a covenant not of a written law, but of spirit.”

The personal purpose of marriage is to express the mutual love, support, and unity of the couple.

* Christian marriage is the union of a man and a woman in Christ.

This unity does not mean losing one’s own identity by merging with another into one personality, nor yielding to domination by the other.

To “become” implies a life-long process. The essential condition of this “becoming one body” is the basic equality of male and female, asserted in the creation.

Sacraments are outward and visible signs or symbols through which god's grace is given to us. The love of man and woman is made holy in the Sacrament of Marriage, and becomes the mirror of your everlasting love.