Jeremiah 29:11Philippians

4:13Psalm 34:5

LettersFromMom

Dedicated to my future children.

I loved you before I even met you

Mom’s Senior

year of High School

Dear children, I have learned a lot in my 19 years that I wanted to share with you.

Relationships are tough, especially growing up. As a college student, I’ve learned so much about relationships : the ones worth fighting for, the ones that are precious, and the ones that change you as a person. Some of the things I want to tell you, you may have to learn for yourself. I know you may not believe your mom; I’ve been there and done that. But I will be here with you through it all and love you through the hardest times. I hope something I tell you in these letters will help you through some rough times and that you have stories of your own to share someday. If it ever gets too tough to handle, remember I am here for you. You won’t always get it right, but that’s ok. I was you once and that’s what I want you to see.

I love you,

Mom

[Type a quote from the document or the summary of an interesting point. You can position the text box anywhere in the document. Use the Text Box Tools tab to change the formatting of the pull quote text

box.]

Dear children,I grew up in a Christian home, and I accepted Christ at a very young age

during Vacation Bible School. Being saved this young, I felt as though my testimony

couldn’t be inspirational. As I look over my life however, I see a lot that I can share with you. God is the most important relationship I’ve had in my life since I asked him into my life that one special day.

When I accepted Christ, my Mom was afraid I was too young to understand what it meant to have a Savior. I didn’t know my multiplication facts, I just knew the basic ABC’s. My mom wanted me to fully understand what it meant to have Jesus in your heart. But I did. I told her that even though I was young I HAD to do this. God was pulling at my heart, and at that young age I really recognized the tug. I went forward on that day and my life was forever changed. My past AND my future sins were forgiven.

As I grew up in school, I invited my friends to church. When I was in Elementary School I invited my twin friends, and they came. It wasn’t until I got into middle school that my friends weren’t really receptive to the Gospel I was trying to share. So… I stopped sharing my child-like faith so boldly.

God reopened my eyes in 7th grade. One of my friends from Elementary school moved back down the street and began going to my middle school again. My best friend Robert was back. Every day we rode the bus together and talked about our day. We just laughed. He always knew of my faith in Christ, but I hadn’t brought it up to him before.

Around that same time I was struggling with purpose and identity. Who doesn’t in middle school? I asked myself what was really my purpose on Earth and why was I where I was? These were very deep questions to be asking myself as a 13-year-old. I began to take my Bible to school, and to this day I don’t remember why. But I knew God had a reason when Robert began asking me questions about Christ. God prepared me with my Bible.

I didn’t know my friend had been struggling with suicidal thoughts. He didn’t believe in himself, or see his potential. When he shared this with me on our bus ride home, I pulled out my Bible and read. He described something to me before I got off at my stop. I have never forgotten his words. He asked me, “Do you ever feel like something is just missing from your life and you don’t know what it is?” I remembered this feeling before I had a relationship with Christ. I knew exactly what that feeling was he was talking about. There was a God-shaped hole in his heart, and he was searching for something to fill it. When he couldn’t find it, he thought suicide was the only way to make it disappear. But I held the answer in my hands that day.

I opened my Bible and just started to read. I told him he was worth something to God. That moment was pivotal in my life. Even though he felt that God sent me to him, God also sent him to me. This was my purpose: to share the answers I had. My friends were struggling all around me, keeping it inside. Some people, like Robert, were struggling with a God-shaped hole in their hearts, and I had the

answers. For so long I had selfishly kept these verses and truths to myself. Instead of holding on to these answers, I knew I needed to begin sharing my faith.

So today, hopefully mot for the first time, I am sharing it with you. God is the only one who can truly satisfy our human hearts. We never know when our lives will change or shift. When it does, who do we have to rely on? Just a year later, my heart ached for Robert. Before moving to Florida, his mom was tragically killed in an accident. I was confused. Robert was so young, but his life was changed forever. In an instant. Would his suicidal thoughts come back? I remembered what I shared with him a year earlier. I wished I had shared it with his mom.

Life is tough and constantly changing. Your friends will change, your dreams will change, and people you know will die suddenly. When life changes, God is the only one who remains constant. He was still there the day Robert’s mom passed away, and he helped him through that tough time in his life.

During the past few years of college I realized just how important my relationship with God has been through circumstances like these. Your uncle, Adam, was dating his girlfriend Katie when her mother was diagnosed with Leukemia and passed away soon after. My friend Sydney lost her husband last month to an infection in his leg. Another man that I went to church with as a child passed away last week from brain cancer. He was 22. Another girl who graduated from my high school in 2014 was in a car accident a week before her graduation. She suffered brain damage and remained in a coma for months. She is currently relearning everything she ever learned, and she lost her vocal scholarships to UK. I’ve learned that even at 19 years old, I can die, and my life can change in an instant. At the end of the day, if I am sitting at the doctor’s office being diagnosed with cancer, the argument I had with my friend last week doesn’t really matter. At the end of the day it is my eternity that matters. At the end of the day it is my heart filled with Jesus that matters. All of these things will one day pass away, but Jesus never will.

Share this with your friends, and never lose sight of God’s importance in your life. He is the only one sufficient to satisfy your heart. He is the only one to remain when everything else fades. The world needs to know. Will you help me share it?

I love you,

Mom

Dear children, I learned a lot about friendships in high school. Let me just start from the

beginning. My freshman year I took a Geometry class from a very lazy teacher. We never did much in class, so I had a lot of time to talk to the people around me. I had always been one of those girls who had lots of friends but no best friend. So when Samantha sat by me and started talking to me about everything best friends talk about, I was so excited. That day, Samantha and I knew we were going to be just that- best friends.

Samantha had been looking for a best friend for a while, too. She valued her relationship with God as much as I did and she focused on her schoolwork like me. This had to be God’s divine intervention. Through break-ups and my tough dancing days, my friend Samantha got me through a lot. It wasn’t until junior year that I realized our relationship was unhealthy.

At the beginning of our friendship we both cared about each other’s feelings and wanted the best for the other. When I was about 16 or 17 I realized I wasn’t the same Ally that I used to be when I started high school. But I didn’t like this change. I had always been a girly girl, so when prom came around I wanted to buy a fancy dress and get my nails done. Samantha became jealous of these things, I found out years later. At the time, I just thought she just saw herself superior to me. When she found out where I bought my dress AND that I wanted to get my nails done, she boasted in the dress that she borrowed explaining that she didn’t have to spend lots of money on material things to feel good or look good. I eventually stopped talking about my favorite “girly” things with her because I thought I focused too much on material things.

My “best friend” also began to put me down when it came to talking to boys in high school. It was like she wanted me to be happy, but her to be happier. Her flirtatious spirit was something she knew she had on me, and she didn’t want the boys near me. Then I could have a chance to beat her. I don’t even know when it had turned into a race. Whenever I brought up flirting or texting a boy, she looked down on me and quite frankly she used our religion to make me feel bad. I wasn’t doing anything but texting or having a casual conversation at lunch. Every time I talked to Samantha about it, I left feeling sinful. So I stopped talking to boys too.

Now that I had altered my “bad habits,” my friendship with Samantha seemed to be ok. It wasn’t until a few weeks into my senior year I realized something was very wrong. After attending a bible conference, I felt compelled to give a few of my friends Bibles. They had been asking me questions about Christianity and I thought the Bibles would aid to my words. When Samantha saw me do this, she got so angry that she ignored me. She wished it had been her idea and she was just down-right jealous. Throughout my senior year she bashed my appearance: my height, my face, my hair. I soon felt so unworthy as a person.

My true friends from College

When Samantha and I graduated from high school, she no longer wanted to be my friend. I had “served my purpose in her life” she told me. I shouldn’t have been so surprised. Our friendship had always been about her, and she no longer needed me to boost her ego.

I regretted so many things after I graduated. It all made sense when I heard from my friends that she was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. Although the way she treated me was wrong, I let her treat me that way. She was in charge of my actions and my happiness. I gave her an authority over my happiness that didn’t belong to her, and that was my mistake.

After I graduated, I felt more Ally than I ever had. I never felt guilty for my interests and I knew God didn’t look down on me for them either. I began a healthy relationship with friends and a boyfriend. I was free.

I crave this for you. Never let anyone change who you are. There will be friends who tell you how to act, or how to live. You know yourself better than them. Never let anyone change who you are. You may feel the need to alter yourself to fit in. But being anyone but who you are will hurt you. Never let anyone change who you are.

I love you,

Mom

Dear children,If I were to be honest, it wasn’t until this year that I realized how

important my relationship with your uncle Adam is. When we were born Adam and I were the greatest of friends. Every time I would get in trouble I was sat in my room behind a gate for a short time-out. I would get so upset. I would scream. I would holler. I would cry. I did this because I knew my “bubbie” would come to my rescue. Each time, no doubt, I would cry and Adam would come to the gate and help me over. He couldn’t let his baby sister cry.

Although we played when we were little, this changed over time. When Adam was young, he was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome, OCD, and ADHD. All of these social issues took a toll on our relationship. In middle school he was bullied, and this continued through the beginning of high school. He was suspended on multiple occasions. I couldn’t believe he would get in fights, and I didn’t understand why. I didn’t live in his shoes though. He would often come home, go to his room, and play video games. I missed my brother, but I didn’t think this would ever change.

Throughout middle school I never made an effort to fix this. I wanted to hang out with my brother like my friends did, but I didn’t know how to do that. I thought he wouldn’t be interested anyway. So I let those years go to waste.

When I left for college in 2013, I knew I was going to miss him. Adam and my parents both helped me move into my dorm and then I was on campus for a straight month before coming home. I remember getting a text from my brother the second week away. He never texted me! So that text made me smile. He asked how school was, and kept a short conversation going. That was his way of telling me he missed me. I missed him too.

That same year he met his first girlfriend, Katie. The Adam I saw was one I had never seen before. He was happy. He had longed for a friendship or

Brother and Sister for life

relationship, and it was finally his time. When I came home on the weekends he would tell me details about his dates. We talked and laughed. I remembered the old times at the baby gate when he helped me get across. I had missed it so much.

Ever since then, Adam is always excited for me to come home. It wasn’t until I went to college that we rebuilt the friendship we had when we were kids. I regret not doing this sooner.

The relationship you have with your family is so special. We will always be your family. Never give up a chance to spend time with us. I wished Adam had known how proud I was of all his accomplishments throughout the years. He works hard at work, and is about to graduate college. I wish I could have the years back and spend more time with him. But I am thankful for the relationship we have now. I’m blessed to have a sibling. Always spend time with them and tell them you love them.

I love you,

Mom

Dear children,I was heart-broken a few times in middle and high school, but I was

never too serious in searching for a future husband. I loved dance too much to spend time doing that. I always said “dance is my boyfriend.”

When I started college last year that all changed. I was really looking for a lifetime partner now. I was happy with my decision to focus on dance in high school, but now I wanted to focus on me and finding someone I could share my life with. My

friendship with Samantha made this hard because I had a lot of trust issues, but I quickly opened up as I began meeting new people in college.

I was almost too focused on finding someone that I though t the first guy to notice me would be the one. I was so wrong. The first guy wasn’t my prince charming, but a total toad. As soon as I stopped searching for someone, heartbroken over this toad, your dad chased after me. The funny thing was, I didn’t want anything to do with him.

I first met Trey at a football game. We watched the Colonels play their first game of the 2013 season. Despite this handsome man sitting beside me, I couldn’t stop thinking about all the chaos that came with starting college. I eventually let him take me on a date. He knew I liked Logan’s Steakhouse, so he thought of me when planning this date. He took me to the restaurant, opened the door for me, and paid for my dinner. He was a total gentleman. But my mind was still so preoccupied with college that I couldn’t see the man God put right in front of my face.

One day I came to my dorm room to find Trey waiting for me with two cupcakes. I had always had a sweet tooth and he remembered this from our previous conversations. I look back and remember how sweet of a gesture this was, but I also remember that I didn’t think it was so sweet at the time. I actually thought it was creepy (don’t worry. I told dad about this later on). Trey didn’t know where I lived, but he found out from my friend who also lived in the same dorm. Poor Trey kept pursuing me and pursuing me, and I didn’t care.

It wasn’t until a month later I realized the man of my dreams had been chasing after me for over a month. Thank goodness he didn’t give up on me before I realized this. I remember the day I realized I wanted to be with him. I was sitting in the Library at EKU working on a paper. I was having some issues with my friend and they were really starting to bring me down. I posted on a social media site about my frustration, and Trey saw it. He did what he always had and checked on me. That day he picked me up and we went to Purdy’s, a coffee shop in downtown Richmond. I sat there in the coffee shop and just opened up to him. I didn’t think twice about it because I knew his character. He was the listening type, he was the trust-worthy type, and he was the comforting type. He was everything I wanted. I FINALLY realized what I had right in front of me. Two weeks later we started dating (10-4-13). Today we’ve been dating for over a year and I’ve never looked back!

I can’t imagine what I would have done if I hadn’t recognized the man God put in front of me. Maybe I would still be chasing a bad boy, wishing he would turn out to be my perfect mate? I’m glad I don’t have to wonder about that though. Sometimes the mate you’re looking for has already been sent to you, or maybe he/she is coming in your future. Don’t let him/her pass you by; always give a good guy or girl a chance. They are hard to find.

Our first Year together

Today Trey is still my best friend and my greatest encourager. We go on dates and smile like we did years ago. I want this for you. I pray that you will recognize the man or woman God puts in your life, and I pray that you love each other every day as closely to how God loves His church. One day your dad and I will give you away. But remember, you will always be my little girl or boy.

I love you,

Mom