Restitution: Restructuring School Discipline

By Diane Chelsom Gossen

Based on William Glasser’s Reality Therapy and Control

Theory

We all have the same basic needs

• Belonging

• Power

• Freedom

• Fun

• Survival

All behavior is an attempt to meet one of these needs.

When a child demonstrates behavior that is inappropriate, our role is to

help them meet their need in a more acceptable manner.

What roles do we play?

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . .?You never get it right.

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . .?Do it for me.

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . .?Do you want a happy face sticker

today?

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . .?You’re always the last one to

finish.

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . .?How can you solve this problem?

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . . ?You never get it right.

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . . ?How many times have I told you?

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . . ?You won’t get a star if you don’t

finish.

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . . ?Remember what I did for you?

P u n ish er G u ilte r B u d dy M o n ito r M a na g er

C u rre n t D isc ip lin e P ra c tices

Who would say . . . ?What do you believe about how

we treat each other?

The Illusions of Control

• The Illusion that we can control the student.

• The Illusion that All Positive Reinforcement Works and Is Beneficial.

• The Illusion that Criticism and Guilt Build Character.

• The Illusion that Adults have the Right of Coerce Children.

If you try to enforce duty only by the sword of state, you never

create a moral being who has any interest in compliance or

who feels obligated to do anything other than simply avoid

the penalties of law.--Benjamin Barber

The Basic Beliefs Behind Restitution:

• Mistakes happen; accidents are a part of life.

• Restitution is about making things better.

• Restitution enables the individual to reclaim self-esteem through personal effort.

• Restitution benefits the person wronged.

• It also benefits the person who has done the wrong.

• Forgiveness is not the same as Restitution.

What does Restitution Sound Like?

• It’s okay to make a mistake. Now what are you going to do to fix it?

• It’s all right to say you’re sorry. Now what are you going to do to fix it?

• You’re not the only one.

• I know you didn’t mean for it to turn out this way.

• I’m not interested in your mistake—I’m interested in what you’re going to do about it.

A good restitution :

• It will be seen by the victim as adequate compensation.

• It will require effort.

• It does not in any way encourage repetition.

An exceptional restitution will also have these characteristics:

• It will be relevant to the general area of the mistake.

• It will be tied to a higher value or mission statement so the child doesn’t see the restitution as an isolated event, but part of a larger picture of how people treat each other.

• It strengthens the child.

Successful Restitution is also characterized by the lack of certain

negative behaviors in the adult:

• Restraint of criticism, guilt, anger.

• Lack of feeling in the helping adult of resentment or being overextended.

Analyze some examples for the following:

• Satisfactory amend to the victim.

• Effort required.• Little incentive for

repetition.• Relevant to the

“situation” where possible.

• Tied to a higher value, mission statement.

• Strengthens the offender.

• No resentment by adult.

• Restraint of criticism, guilt, or anger.

Restitution Options:

• Fix

• Pay back

• Say two positives about person

• Give time in lieu

Moving Toward a Self-Discipline

Hold Fast to Your Values and Let the Rest Go

Does it really matter?

• If he sits with his feet on the floor.

• If she chews gum or not?

• If they are silent while working?

• If they want to change seats?

• If she writes neatly?• If he wears an earring?• If she has a clean

desk?• If he hands in an

assignment late?• If she shows up on

time?

Yes, If . . .

• Say “Yes” as often as you can.

• If you can’t say “Yes,” say “Yes, if . . .” and add the condition necessary to be able to say yes to the person.

• When you say “No,” give the child your reason and don’t change your mind.

May I sharpen my pencil?

• No, you should’ve done that before class.

• Yes, if there is no one else at the sharpener and I am not talking.

May we listen to the radio?

• No, because it would be too distracting.

• Yes, if everyone is on task.

May we go to Disney World?

• No, it’s too expensive and we have no chaperones.

• Yes, if you can raise the money, get chaperones and do the study in advance.

Complain to Me!

• How do you want it to be? (Instead of how you don’t want it to be.) Can you control this?

• What have you been doing to get what you want?

• Is it working?

• Do you want to figure out a better way?

My Job is To . . .

• Exercise developed jointly between the teacher and the students

• Sets out the role of the teacher and the students

• Gives the students the concept of the limitations and roles of both the teacher and themselves

My Job is To . . .

• Teach

• Answer questions

• Explain different ways

• Be here on time

• Go at pace you can learn

• Enforce rules

• Care

Your Job is To . . .

• Learn

• Keep on trying

• Tell me if I go too fast

• Follow the rules

• Communicate your needs

• Listen to me and others

• Ask if you don’t understand

My Job is Not . . .

• To take abuse

• To babysit

• To do your job

• To lend money

• To cover up

Your Job is Not . . .

• To do my job

• To decide for another child

• To discipline others

This is how you get what you want from me

• Word it as a question

• Ask me

• Raise your hand

• Speak clearly

• Be pleasant

• Use logic

• Tell me what you need

This doesn’t work on me

• Crying

• Whining

• Arguing

• Saying, “Everyone is doing it.”

Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is

best.”--Bob Talbert