resting in christ · each person's life journey is similar and different, personally singular...
TRANSCRIPT
Resting in Christ
Chris Kang
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Resting in Christ
ה
Chris Kang
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Copyright © 2015 Chris Kang. Except for brief quotations in
publications or reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in
any manner without prior written permission from the author. Write:
Cover design and photo credit: Elaine Lum. The cover shows
floorboards of the former Penang Free School in Malaysia.
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This book is dedicated to
my lovely wife Elaine
and her beautiful Mum and Dad,
Siau Lin (in memory) and Yun Keong.
ה
Thank you for walking with me
in the grace and truth of our
Lord Jesus Christ.
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CONTENTS
Foreword by Wilfred Yeo
Author’s Preface
One New Life in Christ 11
Two Swimming Manual or Lifesaver? 27
Three True Meditation 31
Four Going Deeper 37
Five Walking with God through Suffering 43
Six Letting Go into True Grace 49
Seven Vindictive Wrath of God: Gnostic Virus in
Disguise? 59
Eight Kenotic God and Dynamic Sunyata 65
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Nine Idolatry 79
Ten Self-Emptying Love of Christ 93
Eleven Practising the Presence of Jesus 97
Twelve Resting in Christ 113
References
About the Author
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FOREWORD
These initial reflections, drawn from Chris' encounter and
personal relationship with Jesus, the Christ, the Son of the
Living God, are refreshing, unabashedly and unashamed
snapshots of a man who has experienced love and fallen in
love with his God. His reflections, meditations, revelations
and applications, arising from his 'organic journey of
growth' with Christ, to and into the ever Triune God,
Father, Son and Spirit, engenders hopes that the reader
may be drawn into a communion relationship with the
Triune God, drawn by Father, revealed through the Son in
Jesus, empowered and experienced by, with, through and
in the Spirit.
Each person's life journey is similar and different,
personally singular and jointly related in all its simplicities
and complexities. These snapshots of Chris' life prompts
one to pause, re-look and reassess the veracity and validity
of experiences, relationships and realities with, in and
through Christ Jesus, the Word who was God, Who
became flesh.
Snapshots remain snapshots. Many more snapshots will be
penned as Chris' 'organic journey of growth' progresses
with its many twists and turns and myriad of encounters
and experiences. Here, they ever remain Chris' records of
his life's moments in time shared with us in love.
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Received by the reader in love in Christ Jesus through the
Holy Spirit, I believe that the reader will be freed to
embark on a similar unique 'organic journey of growth' of
a love relationship with the Triune God, Father, Son and
Spirit.
In this light, and through Him Who is Light, I commend
this book.
Wilfred Yeo
3 June 2015
A seeker in all his human frailties, touched, loved, enabled and
being transformed by the Triune God to continue his exploration of
life, in the Son, Who is Life, Who has become flesh, through the
Spirit, into the Father.
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AUTHOR’S PREFACE
Soon after coming to faith in Christ in 2014, I felt that my
whole world had collapsed, my identity destroyed, and my
career ruined. I had lost everything.
But in His mysterious ways so full of tender mercy and
grace, God has led me through the fire to a clear forest
stream flowing with His sweet eternal presence. His
presence and action in my life is indelible. His touch has
left me radically reborn for an unknown, unseen future.
This book is a tiny snapshot of my encounters with my
Lord and creaturely reflections that follow after. They are
constantly unfolding even as He shapes me to be all He
wants me to be. Foolish though these words may be, I
hope they may nonetheless impart some portion of God’s
wonderful grace to you and magnify His holy name.
I thank God for surrounding me with a multitude of elder
brothers and sisters in Christ: Wilfred Yeo, my theological
buddy; Eeleng, for her delicious nourishing meals; Des
Soares, my trusted elder at Creek Road Presbyterian
Church; Irene Alexander, for her care and counsel; and
Chris Brown, my spiritual director for a gospel-shaped life.
Shalom to them all. And love to all my readers.
Chris Kang
27 May 2015
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One
NEW LIFE IN CHRIST
"Where do I begin to tell a story of how great a Love
can be? The sweet Love story that is older than the sea;
the simple truth about the Love He brings to me.
Where do I start?"
When I was born in Singapore 45 years ago, my
grandfather gave me an impossible Chinese name
"jiang deng-feng" meaning "river climbing to the
mountain peak." This name has been a puzzle to me
all my life, my logical brain finding no solution to this
Zen-like koan that has intrigued me for as long as I can
remember. At age five, my granduncle introduced my
Mum and I to the simple practice of reciting the name
of Kuan Yin Bodhisattva, the feminine personification
of universal compassion in Chinese Buddhism. Also at
age five, I started attending my local Anglican
kindergarten St Hilda’s, where I was first introduced to
the Bible and Christ.
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At fourteen, I started formal Buddhist studies at
Raffles Institution, a top high school and the oldest one
in Singapore founded by Sir Thomas Stamford
Raffles. My Buddhist studies teacher Mrs Toh was
very kind though stern, and I thank her for all she
taught me. Those many afternoons of lectures and
discussions established in me firm foundations in
Buddhist philosophy and practice. At sixteen, I was
part of a team that won the National Schools' Buddhist
Quiz, and as top scorer in the entire competition, I
received a nice book voucher from a local Buddhist
bookshop plus a trophy. That felt good. Around that
time, I met my first Buddhist spiritual mentor Bhante S.
Dhammika, from whom I received my threefold refuge
and precepts marking formal entry into the Buddhist
community. He taught me much of early Buddhism,
Pali suttas, and core Buddhist meditation of śamatha,
anussati, and vipassanā.
In 1990, I met the late Acārya Godwin Samararatne
(1932-2000) who became my heart spiritual teacher.
He guided my meditation practice in impactful and
deepening ways, and was most of all a humble friend
and wise compassionate mentor. He is the only person
in this world I would dare to designate as a 'liberated'
or 'awakened' being, in Buddhist speak. Although
nominally a Buddhist, Godwin was always open to all
spiritual traditions or none. His counsel extended from
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Theravada Buddhists to Chinese Mahayanists, from
Christians to atheists and agnostics without prejudice
or narrow sentiments. He was a spiritual friend
(kalyāṇa-mitta) to all.
In the years that followed, my meditation practice
deepened to the extent that profound states of
unification (jhana) and direct insights into
impermanence (anicca) and non-self (anattā) were
evident. Several unforgettable implosions into timeless
cessation of nibbāna - the unborn and uncompounded -
marked my practice. Results of these direct glimpses
were also increasingly evident in my day-to-day life -
effortless ethical discipline, natural unshakeable
confidence in the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha for
personal liberation, and reduction in greed/attachment
and hostility/ill-will.
From mid 1996-2003, I trained in Hindu tantric
meditation and yoga exercises, fasting twice a month
without food and water for 36 hours at a
stretch. During this time, my meditation practice
deepened and expanded further. I was regularly
entering into deep, boundless, blissful, formless
absorptions to the point where consciousness is so
attenuated that it seems to be non-existent. Further
insights into non-self and nibbanic cessation occurred
during this time. From 1999-2003, I completed my
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doctoral research in Hindu and Tantric studies with
critical comparative analyses of the entire spectrum of
Indian religious and philosophical schools including
Buddhism.
From 2002 to 2012, I studied and practised Tibetan
Buddhism in the Gelug tradition (the tradition of the
Dalai Lamas) under the able guidance of Geshe Tashi
Tsering/Khen Rinpoche. From Lamrim to Highest
Yoga Tantra and Mahāmudra, from Vaibhāṣika to
Madhyamaka, from Abhidharma to Pramāṇa, from
Abhisamayālaṃkāra to Ratnagotravibhāga-śāstra, from
Buddhist logic and epistemology to the intricacies and
complexities of tantric psychophysiology and after-life
theory - I completed a comprehensive curriculum of
Buddhist philosophical and mind training. I completed
retreats in Highest Yoga Tantra, familiarised myself
with generation and completion stages of bliss and
emptiness. Further insights into non-self (anattā)
and śūnyatā (emptiness) were evident during this
period.
From 2009 to 2014, I studied and trained in Dzogchen
theory and meditation under the tutelage of B. Alan
Wallace, undertaking multiple short and longer-term
retreats. I've had other supporting teachers like the
14th
Dalai Lama, the late Kirti Tsenshab Rinpoche
(who taught the Dalai Lama), and Choden Rinpoche.
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In 2012, I was introduced directly to quintessential
Chan practices of mozhao (silent illumination)
and huatou (critical phrase) by Guo Xing Fashi, senior
Dharma heir of the late Master Sheng Yen (1930-2009).
As you can see, I'm a spiritually curious and passionate
seeker of truth since I was a young boy. My search has
never been merely intellectual but encompassed
experiential immersion. In that same spirit, my wife
and I participated in a charismatic Life in the Spirit
Seminar in Singapore in 1995. This was followed by
catechism classes in our local Catholic Church for
some months until we could no longer accept the
traditional doctrines of Catholicism. We did not
continue with our Christian journey, so to speak.
Since 1996, I've been teaching meditation and yoga,
first on an occasional basis and later more regularly.
From 2002, I've also been tutoring and lecturing
academically in the university setting. First as a
mindfulness coach and then as a full-time Buddhist
teacher, I led meditation retreats ranging from one to
five days, covering different styles of Buddhist
meditation practices including mindfulness. All these
have passed away. The old is destroyed, the new
(Gk: kainos) has been born ...
Early this year, I embarked on a solitary Dzogchen
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meditation retreat during which I meditated up to 14
hours a day. It was not difficult to continue meditating
formally even beyond that duration, if I wished to. But
I decided that a few simple things needed practical
attention. Anyhow, my meditation practice has
effortlessly deepened beyond anything I ever imagined.
Breaking coarse awareness into substrate
consciousness, and then breaking through that to a
primordial and subtlest awareness - naked and free,
luminous and dynamic. That awareness rested utterly
and effortlessly in the basic space of reality - luminous,
ungraspable, unlocalised, atemporal, free of any trace
of affliction whatsoever. No self, no problem; no
inherent existence or non-inherent existence; no
coming, no going,; no gain, no loss. The distinction
between meditation and non-meditation faded
away. Every perceptual appearance, thought, emotion,
and mental construct was none other than the effulgent
play of non-reified awareness.
As I proceeded along smoothly in my practice, I began
to realise with clarity and precision that even if I
achieved vimutti (liberation) as taught by the Buddha -
which was a real possibility for me - that in itself was
not the highest and most complete fruit of spirituality.
This realisation marked the beginning of a dramatic
shift in my entire life's practice. A lasting inner peace,
wisdom and compassion are in themselves worthy
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'attainments' but ultimately solipsistic (i.e. lopsided) if
other areas of life remain in peril. Probing and deep
questions chip away at the falsity and reductionism of
spiritual nibbāna while the world around us burn away
in hopeless despair and destruction. For, as the earliest
and most authentic teachings of the historical Buddha
proclaim, one can only purify oneself not another.
However much later Buddhism tries to cover up the
essential lacunae at its very heart with a myriad of
strategies, the fact remains that the Buddha’s core
teaching is about exiting from the world. Flowery
Mahayanist philosophy, shock tactics of Zen, exotic
flamboyance of Vajrayana ritualism and cultic
devotionalism (not to mention crass commercialism),
or even modernist revisions of ‘meditation revolution’
for the masses or ‘engaged Buddhism’ that
camouflages the Buddha’s quintessentially world-
transcending imperative, all fail to convince me in the
end. In fact, engaged Buddhism owes much of its
identity and form to the social justice ethos of the
Christian gospel through the former’s encounters with
Christianity in the modern West.
Self-effort begins and ends in a performance-based
spirituality that fails to satisfy in the final
analysis. The Buddha never promised anything other
than irreversible inner freedom or peace. Any talk of
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fullness in other areas of life through Buddhist
meditation or prayer was nothing other than empty
unreliable chatter and extraneous religious clutter of
later Buddhist tradition. It became evident to me that a
'God-shaped' hole in the hearts of many Buddhists has
caused them to project alien ideas and practices onto
the Buddha's Dhamma to satisfy real and prosaic needs
that a distant and aloof goal of nibbāna can never hope
to satisfy, let alone fulfil abundantly.
Then, in a totally unexpected and unforgettable way,
awareness broke through again beyond its primordial,
nonlocalised, atemporal being into That which I cannot
articulate in words. Rather than a That, perhaps it is
more correct to say a Who. Rather than ‘my’
awareness breaking through, it is better to say that He
who is beyond creation broke through into this
nameless yet fully personal history. He, the eternal
plenitude of grace and truth who loves me with an
everlasting self-emptying love, broke into this side of
creation with a thunderous silence so blazingly gentle,
it melts all that awareness is.
Yet even such description fails as it tends to reify and
misconstrue the full richness, intimacy,
length, breadth, height, and depth of my 'holy
encounter'. This encounter transcends anything I've
ever come across in meditative experience. It was
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utterly outside my expectations and inclinations. It
had nothing to do with me, but everything to do with
Him. Grace personified found me. All the last vestiges
of affliction, striving, condemnation, mistake, failing,
sin fell away as stroke after stroke of these negativities
was absorbed by our Lord and Saviour in total
openness and love. Life, righteousness, peace and joy
superaboundingly flowed from Him into me and
speechless tears overwhelmed me. Rather than a
singular and unrepeatable event, all of this unfolded
over several weeks as an ongoing process of unveiling
and discovery, culminating in a realisation that
radically transformed me from inside out upside down.
Our beloved Lord revealed Himself to me at just the
right time in my life, totally unexpected though it was.
He found His rest in loving me, saving me! So I may
find my rest in Him. Hallelujah!
The best word for this radical insight is revelation - so
pure, so beyond words, so direct and powerful, so
undeserved, unearned, unmerited, unexpected. This
revelation jolted me out of my complacency, making
me realise just what my Lord Jesus has gone through to
save me, how much He has done for me, how high a
price He paid for my redemption and salvation. These
are eternal truths I had never been able to penetrate
thus far with all my so-called 'intelligence,'
'awareness,' 'wisdom,' and 'insight'! I was so blind but
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now I see. Not because I earned it, not because I
achieved it, not because of my so-called 'meditative
prowess' (which is not worth the dust on His feet), but
simply because He freely gave that precious revelation
of Himself to me, a sinner. Yes, I'm most willing to
admit I'm a wretched sinner, now that He has opened
my eyes to Him and what He has accomplished for me
as He hung on that tree. Through and in Him, I tasted a
freedom and victory like nothing I've experienced
before. And with absolute conviction, I shout to the
Lord: "Thank You, Jesus! It is all because of You and
You alone! It is Your victory, not mine. I'm but a
beneficiary of all You've done and I've been set free
because of You".
A Buddhist found Christ in a way least expected. At
last, in total trust and joy I received Jesus as my Lord
and Saviour. "Done is what is to be done! There is no
more becoming ...," as the Pali suttas echo.
The lost sheep finally realised its lostness and heard
and responded to the voice of its good Shepherd.
Christ has beckoned and found me. He called me from
the foundations of the world and brought me into His
heart. And as I entered, He shared with me His Home.
Where do I begin to tell a story of how great a Love
can be? ....
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Friends, I wish I could better tell you what I have gone
through. But my words are limited and concepts
poor. However, if you watch and listen to the Calvary
animation video sermon, you might just catch a
glimpse of what I mean. Watch this:
http://www.newcreation.org.sg/news/announcements/gl
obal-reports/2014/05/07/calvary-animation-video-
(what-happened-at-the-cross)
I know many of my students and friends might be
shocked, even grieving over the loss of a Buddhist
teacher they have known for a time. I fully understand.
I continue to love them and care for them as precious
people who are greatly blessed, highly favoured, and
deeply loved in the Lord. I do this not in my own
power but in His mighty name. Jesus. He is the One
who knew and loved us before we were born.
Finally, my Zen koan has been solved. My Dad gave
me the name 'Chris' when he registered me with
Singapore's Registry of Birth. Chris is short for
Christopher, which means 'bearer of Christ.' Thus, for
this river to climb up the mountain peak, I'd have to
lose my identity as a river to form rain clouds over the
mountain summit.
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How is this done? By being a bearer of Christ Jesus,
our amazing Lord and Saviour.
And this is what I've been called to do for the rest of
my life on earth. Amen!
Postscript:
I'm reminded of a saying from Thich Nhat Hanh, a
respected Buddhist teacher: "Sometime, somewhere,
we take something to be the truth and we cling to it so
much that when truth comes in person to knock at your
door, you will not open it." Jesus has knocked on my
door and His love has moved me so deeply that there is
no other choice but to invite Him into my heart.
It was also tremendously inspiring to catch up with
three old mates, one from as far back as primary school
and two from senior high school. Together, we went
through the top-notched premier schools in Singapore
and all were exceptional scholars (except me of course,
as my scores were usually behind my three friends).
Glad to report they are now all senior consultants in
the medical profession, shouldering leadership roles in
their respective specialties. What's amazing is the fact
that they, being long-time Christian believers, have
prayed for me all these years and are now seeing the
fruit of their prayers in what God has done in my life.
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Though generous, industrious, highly intelligent,
goodhearted super-achievers in their secular profession,
these three old mates and brothers-in-Christ inspire me
with their humble attitude. They celebrate our Lord's
grace in their lives and boast of Him instead of
themselves. While they certainly deserve to feel proud
of what they have accomplished (which is huge), they
nonetheless attribute their success to our Lord. They
could not thank our Lord enough. Hallelujah!
In contrast, I've met quite a few meditators and
scholars who seem to have a problem with pride over
their perceived 'spiritual' and 'philosophical'
attainments. The trouble with man-made religion is
that regardless of tall talk on self and non-self,
enlightenment and emptiness, there is simply no way
one can truly free oneself from the insidious deceptive
grip of self and law (man's fabricated system of dos
and don'ts, techniques and attainments, merit and
demerit, fortune and fall).
Pride remains deeply ingrained and arrogance soon
follows, without warning and scrutiny, made
impervious by the illogic of religio-cultural
rationalisation. This illogic runs deep and is based on
the mindset and system of spiritual merit and demerit
centred around the individual. In the final analysis, it is
a system that is at best temporal, unstable, unreliable,
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and ultimately futile as a way of incomprehensible
eternal salvation.
One final point. The ideas and insights shared in this
book follow my personal organic journey of growth in
Christ, in communion with trusted, kind and wise
elders. Hence, perceived or real theological
inconsistencies between earlier and later chapters may
be apparent. I have deliberately left them unedited so
as to testify to the process of growth from initial
dawning of Christ’s saving knowledge to unfolding
deeper revelations of His being and activity. I walk
with and in Him on this journey without end. It is an
eternal journey into Christlikeness.
I pray that when I come to die, I can say with Paul that
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race,
I have kept the faith” (2 Tim 4:7). Testifying that the
Christian life is not about blessings whether material or
spiritual. That the true Christian life is about Christ
alone as centre and end, rather than means to an end.
For richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, He is all I
want and all I ever want to be. May it be so by the
grace of God. Amen.
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”Rather than ‘my’ awareness breaking
through, it is better to say that He who is beyond creation broke through into this
nameless yet fully personal history.”
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“He, the eternal plenitude of grace and
truth who loves me with an everlasting self -emptying love, broke into this side of creation with a thunderous silence so
blazingly gentle, it melts all that awareness is.”
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Two
SWIMMING MANUAL OR LIFESAVER?
Friends, I want to share with you some musings on the
stark contrast between self-based, avoidance-based,
performance-based spirituality and the true gospel of
grace that irrevocably saves. I borrow this analogy
from others who have used it before. But I'd like to
use it in a way that places in sharp focus the limitations
and ultimate inadequacy of spiritual teaching that puts
all hopes on the self-willing, self-evolving individual.
Imagine you are drowning in a turbulent sea. The
more you struggle, the more you sink. Without outside
help, you will soon tire and drown. Imagine again that
you are thrown a sophisticated swimming manual with
all the swimming techniques and tricks you can ever
find in a book. It even comes with glossy pictures of
swimming champions who won gold trophies using the
techniques of this book. And there is a glamorous
biography of the author himself. You are told in the
manual not to rely on anyone except yourself and to
avoid rough waters when learning how to swim.
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At this crucial juncture, the swimming manual with its
training program comes too late. Your life is seeping
away by the second.
The author of this swimming manual lived about two
and a half thousand years ago and his techniques and
words were not recorded until about 400 years or so
after he died. Some smart people even argue that he
never really existed as a real person.
Now, would you put all your faith and trust in this
manual? Especially given the precarious situation you
are in and the paucity of historical reliability of its
authorship and content?
My friends, in your precarious state, would you have
the inclination, ability, and longevity to learn the 'eight
or ten steps' to 'enlightened swimming' while gulping
mouthfuls of saltwater and hardly gasping for breath?
Would you be helped by the expensive swim-suits,
caps, and goggles that you have been asked to procure
as part of the last-minute swimming lesson?
It seems foolhardy to punch a hole in your pocket at
this critical moment only to die alone and miserable in
the stormy seas.
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Consider this. What if a qualified, strong, bold,
compassionate, and competent lifesaver were to jump
into the sea, take hold of your struggling body with
flailing arms, calm you down with his resonant voice
and physical mastery, and lift you assuredly up onto
the rescue chopper to land safely on dry shore?
Would you be alive to see another beautiful day of
God's creation? Yes, you certainly would!
Jesus is like that lifesaver. He is qualified and
competent, for He is the living Word and eternal Son
of God who has come to dwell among us. He is
strong with all the resources of Heaven at His
disposal. He is compassionate and bold, willingly
laying His life down for you and me even though it
seems so impossible to do. At times like these, when
we are drowning in the sea of life and struggling to
keep afloat, an ancient exorbitant swimming manual is
the last thing we need.
What do we need? We need a lifesaver. We need
Jesus. And what we need to do is call for His help and
let Him save us from ourselves - from the quagmire of
our delusion, alienating isolation, prideful self-
occupation, deadening separation from our Father.
Friends, our lovely Saviour awaits our open hearts and
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open arms. Stop living on struggle street. Stop
stressing in the marketplace. Give all your cares unto
Him. Take His yoke upon you, for His yoke is easy
and His burden light (see Matthew 11:28-30).
Come to Him and find true perpetual rest, not the
counterfeit rest auctioned elsewhere to the highest
bidder. By resting in our Lord and Saviour, you'll find
grace awaiting you just as Noah (meaning 'rest' in
Hebrew) found grace in the eyes of the Lord (see
Genesis 6:8).
Friends, turn away from self and turn towards
Jesus. And you'll find salvation (soteria) like nothing
you've experienced before. It is time.
ה
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Three
TRUE MEDITATION
We live in an age where life’s uncertainties and
stresses push us into all kinds of 'self-help' including
meditation. Meditation in various forms has become a
fad in our busy performance-based culture. Religions
offer myriad brands of meditation for the cashed-up
spiritual consumer.
Buddhism, a tradition I'm most familiar with, has more
than its fair share of diverse meditation techniques for
sale especially the exotic Tibetan ones. And these
Tibetan ones generally do not come cheap. Borrowing
a consumerist metaphor, it is possible to question
whether we are getting the best deal for our financial
outlay when we shop for these spiritual goods. It is
legitimate to ask whether as ‘consumers’, we are being
conned by glossy marketing and modernist revisionism
of old feudal modes of religious control.
True meditation is not for sale. True meditation cannot
be commodified. True meditation does not belong to
the economy of the market. It belongs to the economy
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of gifts. True meditation comes as a priceless gift from
our Triune God who is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
True meditation goes beyond mere stillness, bliss,
emptiness and awareness, however pristine or nondual,
however philosophically astute or emotively rich. We
hear of so many 'enlightenment' techniques. We are
bombarded with advertisements of meditation for sale
by well-fed, well-endowed, globe-trotting 'enlightened'
masters. Ask yourselves: “What am I really buying
here? Do I really want to spend money on these
branded meditation goods? Why are free spiritual gifts
being turned into cash cows for the religious elite?”
We can probe further. Can a broken world entrenched
in darkness and affliction be restored into wholeness
by spiritual platitudes alone? Is meditation truly the
panacea for all of humanity’s problems? Are masters
of meditation truly world-renouncing saints or are they
clever religious entrepreneurs? Is religious power
vested in hereditary religious authorities, propped up
by structures of religious acculturation, part of the
solution or is it part of the problem?
Wallowing in this masquerade of religious piety that
cloaks exploitative capitalism is deeply problematic. It
lulls us into a false sense of spiritual security measured
by how much money we have. Tragically, money is the
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currency to purchase and consume spiritual goods for
our eternal security. Yet, religious deception and
control over unsuspecting minds has been around for a
long time. So has religious feudalism and legalism that
buttress such deception.
Right then in the time of our Lord Jesus Christ,
religious Pharisees in their religious piety and dead
legalism felt sufficiently threatened by the all-
renewing power of His Spirit to crucify Him. They
laid false accusations against Him and sentenced Him
to death in secrecy. For not only did Jesus challenge
the religious empire of these pious folks, He shook the
very foundations of their lucrative economy built
around their complex religious rituals.
Our Lord faced it then. We face it now.
Friends, it is time to wake up from this nightmarish
religious consumerism and ask ourselves what we
really want for our lives. Challenge your own beliefs
and identity, no matter how much you have invested in
them in the past. Pause for a moment and stop
purchasing spiritual bliss with your credit card or
earning your enlightenment with techniques, practices,
rituals, laws, and more laws.
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Ask yourselves this: what if eternity beyond this
present life is not a hoax but a reality? What if how
and towards whom I orientate my life right now has
eternal implications? And if so, how do I think, reflect,
meditate, contemplate, enquire in a way that is truly
free of the encumbrance of self, religious power, and
Shangri-La consumerism?
What is true meditation that sets me free?
Friends, only in communion with our ever fresh ever
lovely Jesus is there true meditation in the Spirit that
unfailingly enlightens, empowers, nourishes, quenches,
liberates. All self-initiated and self-performed
meditation assuredly fails in the end. Only in, through,
and by Grace is it possible for there to be freedom
from the known, from the self.
Grace is what allows and enables true repentance
(Greek: metanoia) to be unleashed in us. Repentance
means a deep change of heart and mind adorned by
positive behavioural change that sets us free in Christ
Jesus. Be done with man-made religion and self-effort!
Enter into grace. Soak yourself in grace. And flow in
the dynamic resonance of grace!
Grace is a gift to be openly received with a heart that
has come to the end of itself. Grace can never be
35
earned, worked for, deserved by our efforts. Our
Daddy God wants to hang out with us always. Let us
want to hang out with Him. For this sweet fellowship
with Him is the best cafe conversation you can ever
have with anyone. Our appointment with life is now, in
Jesus who is our friend.
Talk to Him. Walk with Him. See all things good or
bad, happy or sad, through His eyes. Marvel at the
fresh air you breathe and the shade of the trees that He
has made just for you! That is the beginning of true
meditation.
Home is where love is. Let us come home to God now,
for God is love. And Christ is the evidence of His love.
Will you come home, my friends?
ה
36
“Talk to Him. Walk with Him. See all things good or bad, happy or sad, through His eyes. Marvel at the fresh air you breathe and the shade of the trees that He has made just for you! That is
the beginning of true meditation”.
37
Four
GOING DEEPER
In this chapter, we will not be looking at self-generated,
self-applied, self-maintained meditation. Such is the
way of the world. Man-made religions of the world
propound meditation 'techniques' that share this
common trait. No matter how they are dressed up,
whether with the rhetoric of selflessness or cliches of
guru devotionalism, all ultimately fail to escape the
trap of effort and performance founded in the
individual.
Surveying the various methods of meditation, one can
say that they are based on (1) focusing attention on an
object be it a physical sensation, external object,
visualised image, or awareness itself; (2) inducing
subjective emotional states like love or compassion via
a conceptual or imaginal focus; (3) cultivating a so-
called unbiased awareness of mental or physical events;
(4) analytically probing into an abstract concept such
as emptiness; (5) 'resting' in a space of impersonal
ineffable awareness. While seemingly varied in form,
38
they all exhibit identical structural features.
First, they require from the meditator an investment of
self-effort in the practice. In more advanced stages, the
effort might be so attenuated as to appear seemingly
‘effortless’. Secondly, they are predicated on an object
of meditation however subtle or abstract. Thirdly, they
operate under the system of individual merit and
demerit, performance or lack thereof. Fourthly, they
inexorably entrench the self despite intellectually
sophisticated rhetoric to the contrary. Fifthly, they fail
to go beyond the scope of subject-oriented awareness,
be it egocentric or cosmocentric, localised or non-
localised.
In short, they operate under and can never free
themselves from the confines of self-focused solipsism.
Friends, in the previous chapter, I introduced you to
true meditation rooted in ever fresh ever lovely
communion with Jesus, your personal Lord and
Saviour. I suggested that the beginning of such
meditation lies in opening your senses to the wonders
and miracles of everyday life freely provided for you
by our Lord. And this comes not through forcibly
imposing on yourself a blind belief or idea but solely
through receiving fresh waves of His revelations into
your heart. There is nothing for us to 'do.' There is
39
only holy waiting upon Him in quietness and trust,
with a spiritual posture of willingness, openness,
humility. Having said that, it is possible that as we
begin engaging with this practice, we may feel a sense
of effort in directing attention to Jesus. Or we might
find it much harder than first thought to simply open
and receive from Him. In time however, we come to
realise that even the ‘effort’ to lovingly attend to Jesus
is supplied to us through grace. And so is our openness
to receive from Him. A pure movement of grace.
Friends, there is a deeper dimension to hanging out
with Jesus. Not deeper in terms of practice or
technique. Not deeper in terms of your awareness. But
deeper in His terms, in His eagerness to draw you into
his embrace so you can be forever blessed, highly
favoured, deeply loved with an everlasting love. You
see, my friends, meditation in Christ is not a method of
focusing or resting your awareness on anything. This
meditation has got nothing to do with your self-effort,
your merit, your emotional state, your non-judging
mindfulness, your analytical wisdom, your devotion,
or your spacious luminous ground of awareness.
Rather, this meditation is all about Him and Him alone.
Meditation rests on His everlasting, unfaltering,
altogether lovely meditation on you and I. His
meditation is ever perfect, ever fresh, ever restoring,
40
ever healing, ever providing, ever protecting, ever
loving and ever redeeming in a way beyond anything
you can ever ask or think.
You know what? Your meditation or my meditation
may have ups and downs. We might be smoothly
absorbed one day and hopelessly restless the next. We
might pride ourselves in our realisations or get others
to take pride in us and our attainments. Our meditation
might be ambrosial one day and fallen into the abyss
the next. Who can tell?
But His meditation is unwavering. His meditation is
unsurpassed. His meditation impeccably saves. His
meditation abides timelessly in the ontological depths
of His being, where you and I dwell the moment He
became flesh and took on our humanity.
Our part is to realise we have no part. No part in
keeping up false pretense. No part in self-effortful
practice. No part in looking to our merit or demerit. No
part in training our minds in a graduated fashion or
leaping over into the highest and most refined
techniques of enlightenment. No part in finding and
entering into our own ground of being, however
enticingly spiritual it might seem.
No, my friends, our part at this point is to give up our
41
part and rest totally in Him and His perfect finished
work on the cross! That cross is a symbol of His
perfect meditation in which we can dynamically
participate. Without guile or hypocrisy but with full
surrendering of all that we are and all that we have. For
you and I, our 'deeper' meditation is to simply and
nakedly rest in His peerless unfaltering and life-giving
meditation. His meditation is a passionate outpouring
of His entire being, replete with all His enlightened
wisdom and power, freely imparted to us and for us to
enjoy for eternity.
In the depths of Christ’s being, He as God’s
inexhaustible wisdom enlightens us with effulgent rays
that overcome and transmute all darkness, death,
deception, confusion, and despair. This redemptive
enlightenment began at His incarnation, finished at His
crucifixion, and culminated in His ascension to the
Father’s right hand. Heaven is now our home if we
consent to His presence and action in our lives and
receive Him into our hearts.
You see, my friends, deeper meditation in Christ rests
on remembering and resting in His meditation on us,
for us, as us. From beginning to end, it has never been
about us but always about Him and His redemptive
love for us. Stop running around in the world searching
for the truth that you think or imagine will set you free.
42
What you are looking for, or rather Who you are
looking for, is here in front of you and all around you.
Open your eyes and see! Who you are looking for has
always been and is now looking for you. Christ has
already, has always, and is now personally stretching
His hands out to you, calling you to draw near with all
the sweet tenderness and passion of His heart. He is
calling you to come home to Him, to come home to
love.
Will you respond to His finest whispers of love, my
friend?
"And of His fullness we have all received, and grace
upon grace. For the law was given through Moses, but
grace and truth came through Jesus Christ" (John
1:16-17).
ה
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Five
WALKING WITH GOD THROUGH
SUFFERING
I have often encountered the question of the prevalence
of suffering in our fragile lives and world, and why a
good God would allow such often senseless suffering
to occur. To be honest, I don't know.
What I do know is this: as a Christian, I know that God
cares enough about me to come in person as Jesus
Christ, to go through the worst suffering we can ever
imagine, a suffering which He does not deserve so that
we would never have to go through that same suffering
we justly deserve. You might ask: do we deserve to
suffer like Christ did? The short answer is yes.
And why? Because we who continually fall short of the
perfect goodness and holiness of God; who continually
worship created physical, psychological, social, and
religious idols apart from our Creator Himself; who as
a result of our idolatry commit acts of commission or
44
omission that deprive others of life and peace,
stubbornly persist in thinking of ourselves as somehow
free of fault and entitled to every little comfort of life.
We become so lopsided in our reality orientation that
we deludedly believe that if God exists, He exists
solely to please us and succumb to our every whim and
fancy. But He doesn't.
In spite of all our shortcomings and depravity, God
nevertheless chose to bear the consequences of our
shallowness and squalid natures by incarnating as one
fully human yet fully divine. God became flesh and
dwelt among us to redeem us from ourselves and to
place us in His very being, so we no longer have to
bear the curses of our sinfulness but enjoy eternal
intimacy with God our Father.
What I do know is that my Lord and my God came
down in love for me. He is so much vaster and deeper
than any suffering we can conceive, yet so fully in
touch with our experience of suffering that He suffers
alongside us, with us, in us, for us, as us. What is so
infinitely wondrous and profound is that no matter how
deep or wide our suffering seems to us, in the fiery
cauldron of somatic pain and emotional affliction that
seems so unbearable, there is a divine yet humanly
intimate presence in us that is deeper and wider than
suffering itself. Christ partakes in our human suffering
45
so fully and completely that we can now partake freely
in His divine peace and wholeness, not as a movement
of escape or transcendence, but as something radically
different and unheard of in any wisdom or faith
tradition of the world.
He partakes in our suffering and we partake in His
abundant life and peace through the immanent
transfiguration of our pain and affliction in His
effulgent light. In the midst of our suffering, we see,
hear, smell, taste, feel and cognise the sweet healing
transformative presence of our Lord and Saviour, our
everpresent Emmanuel (God-with-us). Instead of
being swallowed up by suffering, our suffering
however intense or longstanding is swallowed up in
totality by Christ Himself. And as our suffering and its
roots in our false self-identities are decimated in Him,
we are liberated to live more abundantly and
graciously in the plenitude of His resurrection life
flowing in and through us. We who belong to Christ.
And as His brethren, we receive in faith His glorious
salvation which we steadily work out in our dynamic
walk with Him, bearing verdant fruit of the Spirit. We
begin to partake in His binah wisdom, shalom peace,
hesed loving-kindness, shekinah glory, dunamis
power, charis grace, and agape love. Through faith in
Him, His strength is made perfect in our weakness!
46
My friends, in the midst of our pain and affliction, we
can look back to what Christ has done for us by Him
becoming flesh, receiving abuse and rejection, getting
scourged and spat on, nailed and crucified, and hung to
die our deaths in the darkest pit of hell. We can look
in to the indwelling Spirit of Jesus in the innermost
recesses of our hearts, to always rest in His embrace no
matter what storms befall us. We can look forward to
the day when He will come again to make all things
new, to usher in the new heavens and a new earth
where pain, sickness, grief and death shall be no more.
I thank Timothy Keller for his insights on these three
points of looking back, looking in, and looking forward
to Christ, the true ground of hope and salvation for all
of us regardless of social and biological differences,
now and forever more.1
Friends, no matter what you are going through right
now, know that you can always come back to Jesus,
who has loved you with an everlasting love. Let not
your pain and afflictions cast you down or hold you in
paralysis. Step into His presence, open your heart to
Him, and let Him love you to the end of time, the end
of all suffering.
For only Christ is the way, the truth, and the life. When
you drink from the bubbling spring flowing from the
spiritual Rock that is Jesus, you will never thirst again.
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If that is you, no matter where you are, from your heart
receive Jesus into your life:
"Lord Jesus Christ, I believe into You. I believe you
became flesh, lived and suffered our humanity, died on
the cross and rose again, and ascended to heaven, all
for me. I am a sinner but your blood has washed me
clean of every sin. Thank you for restoring my right
relationship with our Father. I receive You as my Lord
and Saviour now and forever more!"
If you have prayed this prayer, please accept my warm
welcome into the family of God. You are now a
beloved child of our Father in whom He is well-
pleased. Praise God!
ה
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”Friends, our lovely Saviour awaits our open hearts and open arms. Stop living on struggle street. Stop stressing in the marketplace. Give all your cares unto
Him … … Come to Him and find true perpetual rest, not the counterfeit rest expensively sold elsewhere. By resting in our Lord and
Saviour, you'll find grace awaiting you …”
49
Six
LETTING GO INTO TRUE GRACE
Whether we turn to look inwards into our minds or
outwards to the world, we see a constant flurry of
unease. Increasingly, our hearts are not at peace.
Unredeemed life ricochets in a sea of insecurity that
we either ignore or assuage with spiritual palliatives
that do not ultimately work. In our health, relationships,
finance, career, even entertainment, there is neither
real security nor peace. No lasting wholeness that we
can find anytime, anywhere. On the contrary,
everywhere we look, there seem to be reports of stress
and malaise, broken marriages, child abuse, addiction
to drugs and alcohol, economic meltdowns, new
epidemics, rampant acts of terror, ecological
destruction, and mental worry, fear, anxiety and
depression.
When we come to spiritual practice, especially
meditation - a popular past-time in our highly strung
modern world - we often hear of the need to 'let go.'
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Many famous teachers teach this. Many more try to
practise it. Yet very few, if any, succeed in truly letting
go. In the world, when people attempt at letting go,
they either fall into indulgence or sloth. In religion,
when serious folks try to 'let go' as they go about their
meditation, they either fall asleep, fall into addiction,
or just fall. Wait a minute! Did you say addiction,
Chris? Well yes, I did say addiction.
Addiction to what? Addiction to a false peace and
security shut off from the world of meaningful
engagement. Often euphemised as quasi-spiritual
sound bytes like 'calm' or 'tranquillity', what many
serious meditators call 'letting go' is little different
from physiological hibernation that is unfruitful. Such
'letting go' does not come close to creating even a
semblance of genuine peace much needed by a broken
and increasingly darkened world. In man-made
religious practice, it is common to see a life-denying,
unfruitful pseudo-serenity lulling good people to sleep,
or worse, death, if not mortally then psychologically
and spiritually.
For the very few that manage to escape the seductive
blind alley of pseudo-serenity, they may find some
sparkle and peace in what they might regard as
'genuine letting go'. Don't get me wrong. These are
sincere and single-minded individuals seeking a lasting
51
cure for their existential malaise. They are willing to
put in the hard yards and thousands of hours of 'bums
on cushions' in order to meditate properly. Some of
them may even be 'well respected' masters of
meditation, living in forests of Thailand or caves in the
Himalayas. They espouse ethical discipline, simplicity
of needs, earnest awareness, quiet introspection, and
everything else contemplatives think they need to 'let
go' and 'break through' into the deathless state. Though
outwardly simple and even ascetic, one cannot be quite
sure just how much mental clutter is carried inwardly.
But say, for the even rarer few souls that manage to
declutter their minds sufficiently, a more insidious
challenge awaits.
This challenge takes us beyond letting go, to the
ineffable inner peace where our struggles with the
world supposedly end. This is the realm of nibbanic
cessation. Sorry to disappoint you but even the
'complete peace and freedom' that comes from 'letting
go completely' is still located on this side of creation.
Nothing, not even nibbana, breaks through to the
Beyond, to the Creator who can never be reached by
self-effort but who instead reaches out for us by a pure
movement of grace. The initiative and timing is all
from His side, not ours. There is nothing for the ego –
gross, super-attenuated, or seemingly absent – to do.
Nibbanic consciousness itself remains incapable of
52
touching the other side of creation ‘where’ the Triune
One is, ceaselessly outpouring His love to us.
Thus, for the extremely rare person who lets go
completely, his or her struggles with the world may
have ended but the groanings of a struggling and
broken world remain unabated. Even if the completely
peaceful heart can now respond sensitively to the pain
of the world, the limited human, however enlightened,
can never save the world from pain, or restore its
brokenness, or redeem its fallenness. Humanity can
never save humanity, for humanity itself is in need of
saving.
Only God who is eternally beyond humanity and
creation yet immanently passionate in humanity and
creation can, and will, save. It is written,
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only
begotten Son that whosoever believes into (Greek: eis)
Him shall not perish but have everlasting life" (John
3:16).
Christ did not come into our world to condemn but to
save. Many, especially religious and legalistic folks,
rejected Him. Yet what crucified Him on the cross was
not Roman mercilessness or Jewish contempt but the
totality of all humanity's sins. Yes, including the sin
53
of overestimating our own power to save ourselves, the
false thinking that we can meditate our way to
salvation, and that our self-efforts will liberate us in
the end. I used to think like the world does, like man-
made religions do. But not now. Now I know better.
Now I know that this rhetoric of salvation by and
through self-effort is nothing but a big fat lie.
Salvation, which is total deliverance and wholeness
comes by and through Christ alone. When we see
deeply the loveliness of the person of Jesus, joy and
hope overfills our heart. When we comprehend the
perfection of His finished complete work on the cross
on our behalf, faith overwhelms us and peace reigns in
our conscience. We realise that freedom and peace is
neither about us nor is it the result of our efforts,
whether individual or collective. From beginning to
the end, it is and has always been about Him and His
love for us. Love came down, full of grace and truth, to
set us irrevocably free.
Friends, when we keep our gaze and understanding on
Jesus, our Redeemer and Friend, we cannot help but
taste His freedom and His peace. Mired in sin and
curse since the fall of humanity at creation's dawn, we
have suffered the fruit of our own rebellious pride.
This same rebellious pride keeps us in the circle of
self-effort and performance-based spirituality, and
54
stops us from coming into intimacy with our Father.
He yearns to draw us close to Him, to embrace us in
His infinite heart of love, to give us all the blessings of
salvation He wants for us. But He will not force these
blessings upon us if we choose to reject His Son,
whom He has sent to save us from ourselves. On the
cross, God's justice and mercy kissed.
God's holiness can never condone sin and leave sin
unpunished. But God's mercy can never bear the cries
of our pain even if our sinful acts rooted in our old
Adamic nature need to be dealt with. So God sent His
Son instead - One who is one nature with the Father,
One who knew no sin and did no sin and is not sin (see
2 Cor 5:21) - to be sin for us so that we may become
the righteousness of God in Him. How great is the love
of our Father for us that He chose to enact His
righteous justice on His Son who is one with Him, so
we may be brought into close intimacy with Him.
Because of Jesus, we can now come boldly to the
throne of our Father and cry, "Abba, we are Your
beloved children in whom You are well-pleased!"
Friends, the more we look to Jesus and His finished
work, the more we fall deeply in love with Him. Faith
arises and grows effortlessly. As faith grows, the
pipelines of God's supply burst open so we can receive
more fully than ever before the infinite blessings that
55
He is ever pouring out to us. Blessings encompassing
our material and spiritual natures but more importantly
blessings that enable and empower us to be more and
more like Christ.
Here, our letting go has a sure foundation. Our letting
go of all self-effort and performance-based thinking
allows us to transcend the many blind alleys of self-
directed practice of 'letting go.' We cease looking to
ourselves for deeper and deeper releasing of our
neuroses and tensions. We stop believing in the
deception of self-earned enlightenment. Our letting go
is grounded in the fathomless ocean of God's grace.
Believing into Him goes far beyond and far deeper
than mere belief of an individual subject in an external
object however supreme. Instead, believing into Him
denotes a dynamic process and movement of trust and
love, where the lover and the beloved entwine in a
shared passion, shared intimacy surpassing notions of
'I' and 'mine', 'I here' and 'you there'.
So, faith or believing into Jesus profoundly conjures
the sense of peerless letting go into God's
inexhaustible supply. Wave after wave of unearned,
undeserved, unmerited favour unceasingly flows to us,
with fresh supply of grace for every new challenge or
trial. We do not seek it. We do not labour for it. We
only hasten (Gk: spoudazo) to enter into that rest of
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Christ's finished work. This is a rest and refreshing that
surpasses anything we can ever ask or think, for it is
not born of the flesh but of the Spirit.
Bear in mind though that I am speaking
epistemologically, not ontologically. As far as the
ontological chasm between absolute Godhead and
historical creature is concerned, I as a created being am
inescapably distinct and apart from Him who is
timelessly beyond all conceptual and linguistic
confinement. He is LORD. I am His. Jesus the Son has
joined me in and through Him to HIM the Father in the
Spirit.
Friends, let us raise our hands in letting go and letting
God's supply flow. Let us turn away from self-
occupation and turn towards Christ. Let us let go in
Christ alone who is our Refuge, Rock and Shelter for
all time.
The Lord bless and keep you and be gracious to you in
these end-times. Come, Lord Jesus, come!
ה
57
“We cease looking to ourselves for deeper and deeper releasing of our neuroses and
tensions. We stop believing in the deception of self-earned enlightenment. Our
letting go is grounded in the fathomless ocean of God's grace.”
58
“Rather, our sovereign and almighty God is able to voluntarily assume the totality of our corrupt humanity so as to
confront, overcome, and transmute sin and evil in the depths of his very being.
59
Seven
VINDICTIVE WRATH OF GOD: GNOSTIC VIRUS IN DISGUISE?
My brothers and sisters, I'd like to briefly address a
thorny and possibly highly controversial issue. For a
while now, a phrase often used in church preaching
and writings has bothered me. This phrase has led me
to reflect on the kind of God we worship as Christians
and the implications of our view of God on the way we
relate to others, especially those we consider 'outsiders'
or 'non-believers'. In his inimitably quiet and
unobtrusive way, the Spirit gathered me in
conversations with respected elders in Christ and
prompted me to finally write this piece. Here goes.
To cut to the chase, let me just say outright what I
currently think. I am persuaded that the theology of the
wrath of God exacting divine punishment on sin due to
God's utter disgust of sin, and by extension exacting
punishment on Christ who acts as our penal substitute,
is problematic. This theology of God's wrath as
articulated seems to me to rest on at least the following
60
assumptions, assumptions which may prove to be
fallacious.
First, there is a conflation of sin and sinner resulting in
punishment of the sinner when the actual target should
be sin. How (and for that matter why) should sin be
'punished' in a wrathful way begs an answer in its own
right.
Secondly, there is conflation of God's way of dealing
with sin and Man's way of punishing sin. Sociological
and anthropological studies might show just how
humanly constructed the notion of 'punishment' is
especially when exacted in response to violation of
social norms and cultural behaviours. But is God really
like that? Or are we creating a punishing angry God
that reflects our own inadequate and immature
response to the problem of sin?
Thirdly, there seems to be a confusion of God's 'wrath'
as spiteful anger seeking destruction at all costs rather
than as a 'welling up' of determined resolve to deal
with sin, as in original Greek 'orge' which signifies
'welling up or rising of energy' but often translated as
'wrath.'
Fourthly, there seems also to be a forgetting of
Patristic theology of the early church, which theology
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has been the basis of the Christian faith from its
beginnings to the present day. In particular, today's
preaching seems so obsessed with the crucifixion event
that the entire teaching on the incarnational redemption
effected in and through Christ seems to be forgotten
and unspoken. In the nondualistic incarnational view
of the Church Fathers (e.g. Athanasius, Ireneaus, Cyril
of Alexandria), sin and evil has been forever dealt with
by God in the ontological depths of Christ's humanity
by the transmuting power of the Lord's kenotic love.
Our biblical God is not a God who fears or abhors evil
to the extent he has to quarantine himself from it.
Rather, our sovereign and almighty God is able to
voluntarily assume the totality of our corrupt humanity
so as to confront, overcome, and transmute sin and evil
in the depths of his very being. And because of this,
evil no longer has any hold over us. Evil is real. But
evil is not on par with God. In the end, evil is parasitic
on good and has no substance given its nature as
privation of good. God is far greater than evil and has
no need to fear or excise himself from evil (I am
indebted to brother Wilfred Yeo for thought-provoking
conversations on this and other issues.)
Finally, the presupposition that God hates sin and
cannot come near it suggests a Gnostic recoiling from
impurity and evil on the part of our God. Gnosticism,
62
considered a dangerous heresy in the early church, is
an insidious perverted view of spirit's utter separation
from matter where what belongs to spirit is
uncompromisingly pure and what belongs to matter
and the world is inescapably corrupt. How can this be
for our biblical God of love and justice who is absolute
creator yet personally immanent in his relationality and
historicity? Have we in our human inability to accept
the messy corruption of life and the instinctual
avoidance of brokenness (physical, emotional or
spiritual) inadvertently fallen prey to the Gnostic virus
that has infected our theology without us even
knowing?
Much more can be said about how we are to
understand scriptural passages where the 'wrath' of
God is mentioned. Also, the theology of the crucifixion
and resurrection of Jesus Christ can be further
unpacked in light of the foregoing discussion. That is a
matter for another time and another post.
Friends, I know what I have written here may shatter
strongly held beliefs (even my own as attested to in
previous posts) and provoke some anger (not least
towards me.) But I share these ideas and questions
with you in the hope that we can participate in a
process of free and open inquiry grounded in love so
that we may reclaim what is true and gracious in
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accord with our Father's heart for his children and his
kingdom.
Let the gospel of truth and grace shine brightly in these
dark times.
ה
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“And because of this, evil no longer has any hold over us. Evil is real. But evil is not on par with God. In the end, evil is parasitic on good and has no substance
given its nature as privation of good.”
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Eight
KENOTIC GOD AND DYNAMIC SUNYATA
The late Masao Abe (1915-2006) was a Japanese Zen
Buddhist and professor in religious studies who became
prominent in Buddhist-Christian interfaith dialogue. Abe's
distinctive brand of Kyoto school philosophy challenges
us to rethink alike our stock conceptions of God in the
Judeo-Christian context and of emptiness (śūnyatā) in the
Buddhist context. I have been stimulated by his writings in
this regard, especially his thought-provoking piece
Kenotic God and Dynamic Sunyata.2
Much can be said about the various strands of Abe's ideas
in this seminal article. But here, I'd like to focus on just
one of these strands. I am particularly intrigued by Abe's
theological challenge posed to the notion of God's love
and its relationship to choice. For Abe, as I understand
him, the Buddhist notion of śūnyatā or emptiness denotes
the radical groundlessness of all things given that
everything exists in utter dependence on everything else
and thus nothing is a closed self-existent entity in the
66
Buddhist schema. In other words, śūnyatā points to the
'boundless openness' and 'agentless spontaneity' of
ultimate reality, a reality that is simultaneously seamless
with the historical and the relative. The relative world of
mountains and rivers, animals and plants, humans and
their technological marvels is none other than the ultimate
sphere of śūnyatā - a truth perceptible to and experienced
by one fully awakened as a result of meditative endeavour.
For me, Abe's reading of śūnyatā poses a theological
question to the Christian who believes in an absolute
personal God standing behind the realm of created order,
who as a self-existent being (whose existence is not
dependent on extraneous causes or conditions) loves all
creation and humanity with unconditional agape. For Abe,
śūnyatā applies to all of reality - relative or ultimate,
created or uncreated (whatever that means) - and thus
would apply to God if he indeed exists (which to general
Buddhist sensibility, he obviously does not). How,
assuming that reality is indeed radically interdependent,
fluid, open, and agentless at its core (with agency nothing
but a false reified apprehension of what is essentially
process through and through), can there be room for a self-
existent unchanging creator God that stands ontologically
apart from creation acting upon and in created reality?
Would not such divine action imply change on the part of
God for what is action but a change of some sort?
Moreover, if God cannot escape change by virtue of its
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creative activity, would this not imply that God cannot be
self-existent or independently existing from his own
side? Hence, would God not be empty or of the nature of
emptiness (śūnyatā ) as per Abe?
I'd like to address this challenge in several ways. First, by
addressing the tension between notions of an eternal God
and a God that changes. Secondly, by showing how a
changing yet self-existent God can be said to have a nature
of emptiness (śūnyatā) and yet is inexhaustibly beyond
any human attempts to conceptually confine him. Thirdly,
by arguing that seeing God through the non-dualistic and
relational lens of Patristic theology (a perspective that is
often missing or lost in today's Christian preaching and
teaching) allows us to speak of the kenotic or self-
emptying God without compromising the real personhood
of the Triune God.
First, the biblical God is eternal, timeless, standing outside
time yet is immanently present in and active upon
temporal reality. How is this possible? My view is that the
nature of God in terms of both his communicable and
incommunicable qualities (i.e. impassibility, aseity, love,
omniscience, omnipotence, goodness etc.) intrinsic to
himself are eternal, timeless, unchanging, just as the
fluidity and wetness of water is unchanging no matter
whether the water is clean, dirty, muddy, coloured, cloudy,
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or transparent. Better still, the two atoms of hydrogen and
one atom of oxygen that comprise the water molecule
remain unchanged no matter whether that water is clean or
dirty. Hence, God is self-existent in so far as his
intrinsicality is concerned.
Functionally, God moves and acts and thus 'changes' in
and through his eloquent dynamism that is expressed in
both creation and incarnation, just as water can take many
shapes and sizes according to its container or flow rapidly
or slowly according to its volume and slope of its terrain.
God is thus enousios logos* or intrinsically eloquent by
nature. God speaks and his Word (logos) is what makes all
things possible, rendering order and rationality to
everything that is made. God is also enousios energeia* or
intrinsically active by nature. God creates and shapes all
things, intervenes in the created order, and incarnates as a
human being out of love to redeem, save, and free all
creation from the prison of sin and darkness. Note that his
eloquence and creativity are not separate from his being or
nature as demonstrated by the word enousia meaning 'in
his essence or nature'. Rather they are non-dualistic and
inseparable. Hence, God is eternally unchanging in
intrinsic nature and constantly changing in function - an
eloquent dynamism that is integral to his nature.
Secondly, an eloquent dynamic God is thus empty of a
static reified self-existence that Aristotelian thought would
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call an Unmoved Mover. In fact, using Aristotelian
categories to capture the biblical God so as to understand
him is, to my view, to try to tame something that is not
easily subject to domestication. Such a move is also
anachronistic and risks obfuscation rather than
clarification. By stripping away our conditioned
Aristotelian lens, we can approach the creative being of
God in fresh ways that come closer to a view indigenous
to scripture itself. In this regard, Abe's conception of
śūnyatā may prove helpful in so far as it offers a
relationally dynamic metaphysic and an open spontaneous
epistemology that speak to the truths of the God of the
Bible. In so doing, Abe's śūnyatā may serve to bring into
sharper focus the boundlessly spontaneous and agentless
heart of God as he dances and weaves the fabric of the
kosmos in creation and implements the redemptive
incarnational design of the saving Christ.
In the absolute interior of his own relational being, God is
ceaselessly outpouring in love between Father, Son and
Spirit, the three Persons of Godhead. Our Triune God is
eternally three yet one, one yet three, not so much in terms
of oneness in substance, but in terms of conjoint
relationality where each Person of the Godhead co-exists
only in relationship with the other. There is to my mind
no other way the three Persons can exist without falling
into the chasm of substantialism - be it of the unity or
multiplicity kind. Both substantialist unity and
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substantialist multiplicity pose intractable theological and
practical problems which I will not discuss here. Thus,
Father is Father only in relation to the Son; Son is Son
only in relation to the Father; Spirit is Spirit only in
relation to both Father and Son. The three Persons of the
Godhead are three in the several relationship but one in
the joint relationship (I attribute this joint-several
relationality framework to my theologically informed and
Spirit-filled elder brother in Christ, Wilfred Yeo).
Each Person is a person in so far as they relate,
communicate, care and love. In other words, personhood
is not a synonym of isolated agency or inherent existence
but a functional descriptor of pure relationality and love.
As such, when we speak of the biblical God as ceaselessly
outpouring in love within the interior relationality of his
being, we can understand this as an act of agentless
spontaneity in a field of boundless openness that is
śūnyatā.
Having said that, we must be careful not to think that we
have exhausted all that can be said of God's innermost
nature. On the contrary, if God is by definition fathomless
truth and grace (pleroma), it bodes us well to adopt a
posture of intellectual and spiritual humility even as we
earnestly seek to fathom him on this side of creation. In
other words, we would do well to embrace an open-ended
hermeneutic that creatively seeks to answer the deepest
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questions yet is endlessly enthralled by how much of the
incomprehensible mystery of God we do not yet know.
Thirdly, by returning to the early roots of the Christian
faith in Patristic theology, especially the thought of church
fathers like Athanasius, Ireneaus, and Cyril of Alexandria,
we can catch a glimpse of their non-dualistic and
relational insights into the Godhead that enables a fresh
appropriation of the gospel for these troubled times. In the
contest against Gnostic tendencies and dualistic-separative
views of God in the first few centuries of the church,
luminaries such as Athanasius and others sought to
reclaim a biblically sound understanding of God
encapsulated in the Nicene Creed of 325 A.D. Prominent
20th century theologian Thomas F. Torrance writes of the
deeply non-dualistic, integral and relational God of
Scripture as opposed to the spiritually isolated, impersonal,
separative God of the Gnostics that finds itself utterly and
forever quarantined from any trace of evil, brokenness, sin
or corruption.
To Torrance and Athanasius, such a hyper-sanitised
conception of God is not only unbiblical but wrong. The
God of the Old and New Testaments is a profoundly
personal God who is not afraid to get his hands dirty, so to
speak. He is a God who is not afraid of evil, sin,
corruption, brokenness. For though evil is real and
effectual, it is nevertheless secondary to good at best, for
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evil is simply a privation of good. The substantial reality
here is good not evil. Evil is parasitic on good and
ultimately holds no water. Thus, God has no need to
quarantine himself from evil out of fear or disgust. God
can, is able and willing to come down to our level of
brokenness through his self-emptying love, to incarnate as
us in and through Christ and redeem our sin and
corruption within the ontological depths of his humanity.
Christ the Son, as incarnate Word and Saviour, comes to
us in our fallenness and incorporates all of us into his fully
assumed humanity. In joint-oneness with the kosmos and
humanity, Christ the Son of Man shines his light and
wisdom into our darkened hearts and souls, enlightening
us to all truth and with his Spirit empowering us to grow
in all that is good, true and beautiful. Christ confronts,
masters and transmutes all evil within the depths of his
and our humanity by his self-emptying love. Indeed, this
is love.
Self-emptying or kenotic love.
That God is willing and able to change for us, partaking in
our human nature in order that we can partake in his
divine nature. Such change on God's part does not in any
way exhaust who he is and all he is; nor does it detract
from his eternal nature as God. Rather, his condescending
and incarnational love exalts who he really is. A God of
total and unconditional love and justice in accord with his
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righteousness.3 Strictly speaking, it is the Son who empties
himself through kenosis to become flesh and dwell
amongst us. But God being a triunity of Persons whose
integral wholeness should and can never be broken, it is in
my view possible to speak of God emptying himself for us.
In other words, since the Father and Spirit are necessarily
present where the Son is, it makes no sense to talk of the
kenotic Christ without implying a kenotic Father and
kenotic Spirit - thus a kenotic God is necessarily implied.
Bringing in Abe at this point, I argue that in the absolute
interiority of God's relational being, a spontaneous and
agentless outpouring of love endlessly flows between the
three Persons of the Godhead. This flow of love is at once
an effulgence of divine eloquence (enousios logos) and
dynamism (enousios energeia) intrinsic to God's being.
And that this self-emptying love is no different from the
fathomless expanse of boundless openness at the heart of
God's being.4 And from God's heart, from his absolute
interiority of being, he creates the universe in an explosion
of rapture and incarnates as Man out of his irresistible
self-emptying love. This creative and loving act of God
reiterates the fundamentally personal and relational
essence of his being.
In conclusion, I hope I have shown that the Triune God of
the Christian faith is both a self-existent eternal being and
dynamically loving creator and saviour. This seeming
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tension between the unchanging and changing natures of
God is resolved in the nondualistic relational
understanding of the Godhead through retrieval of the
essence of Patristic theology. The complementariness of
God's eternality and dynamism is well expressed in the
non-substantialist, non-reifying discourse of
śūnyatā applicable to both the whole of creation and the
absolute interiority of God's relational being. More can be
unpacked and said, but enough for now.
"In this is love, not that we loved God but that He loved us
and sent His Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our
sins" (1 John 4:10).
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me
and I in you, you will bear much fruit ... As the Father has
loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love"
(John 15:5, 9).
ה
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“That God is willing and able to change for us, partaking in our human nature in
order that we can partake in his divine nature. Such change on God's part does not in
any way exhaust who he is and all he is; nor does it detract from his eternal nature as God. Rather, his condescending and
incarnational love exalts who he really is.”
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Terminology
*Ke.no.sis. (Gk.) : | "A Greek word used in theology with
reference to the self denial of the Son of God in becoming
incarnate and entering into His state of humiliation. The
use of the term is based upon Philippians 2:7 where the
phrase heauton 'ekenose, 'emptied Himself,' occurs. ...
[See also John 17:5 and 2 Corinthians 8:9 for other places
where this idea finds expression.]" [i]
*Pur.na. (Skt.) : || A Sanskrit word denoting the fullness,
perfection, and wholeness of the Divine that is essentially
infinite and complete in itself, free of any need to fulfil
desires.
*Ple.ro.ma. (Gk.) : || "[A Greek word that ...] denotes
'fullness'that of which a thing is 'full'; it is thus used of the
grace and truth manifested in Christ, John 1;16; of all His
virtues and excellencies, Ephesians 4:13; ... God in the
completeness of His being, Ephesians 3:19; Colossians
1:19; 2:9. ..." [ii]
*Sun.ya.ta. (Skt.) : || "[A Sanskrit word denoting ...] the
doctrine of 'emptiness' or 'voidness' stressed in many
Mahayana sutras. It goes beyond the early Buddhist
position of anatman (not-self) in stating that even dharmas
[phenomena] have no existence in their own right. One
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must be careful to understand that sunyata itself is not an
ontological state, and that even emptiness is empty." [iii]
________________
[i] Merrill F. Unger and R. K. Harrison (eds.) (1057, 1988) The
New Unger's Bible Dictionary. Chicago: Moody Bible Institute of
Chicago, p. 734.
[ii] W. E. Vine, Merrill F. Unger, William White, Jr. (1984,
1996) Vine's Complete Expository Dictionary of Old and New
Testaments. Nashville, Tennessee: Thomas Nelson, p. 259.
[iii] Charles S. Prebish and Damien Keown (2006) Introducing
Buddhism. New York: Routledge, p. 284.
ה
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“The King has emptied Himself to be
for, with, and as us. He who deserves all worship chose to wash His disciples' feet, our feet. Let Him wash you now. Let Him love you with an everlasting love.”
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Nine
IDOLATRY
Human beings are experts in idolatry. We do this
almost instinctively. We need no training. Often
though, training in the form of social and cultural
conditioning further entrenches our instinctive idolatry.
And what's worse is that we do not even know we are
idolaters. Even if inchoate whispers in the depths of
our souls seek to penetrate through the fog of our
denial, we are only too quick to ignore or hush up
these whispers. Pride trumps self-honesty. A case of
fragile egos fearing exposure. Broken human beings.
Totems of idolatry
What comes to mind when you read the word
'idolatry'? Religious statues? Graven images? Mega-
buildings and oversized monuments of religious
worship? Well yes. These are totems of idolatry no
doubt. But there is more. In our media-hyped world,
we are bombarded with TV strains of idolatry such as
American Idol, Australian Idol, and what not. Hyper-
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ventilating over creaturely symbols of cosmetic, sexy,
populist charm. In our hyper-modern society, we crave
as sources for our deepest identity and fulfilment
media-caricatured idols of money, sex, romance, power,
prestige, possessions, partners, internet dates, facebook
fans, twitter followers, food. Even innocuous things
that can be good when seen in their right perspective
can become idols for us when we place all our identity
and hope in them. Things like marriage, career,
children, and nature itself.
Idolatry of nature
While creation before the Fall is indeed good, it is now
darkened and broken. When we worship nature or
embed our spirituality in it, we are entrusting our souls
to something broken, transient, disintegrating,
ultimately unreliable. Instead of allowing creation to
point us to the creative luminosity of its Maker, we
idolise the created dis-order of nature. We build our
fragile hope on the fragile earth, inviting us into more
pain, fear and despair when climate change threatens to
burn up the planet. Broken creation can never be a
source of refuge for broken humanity. And you
guessed it - broken humanity by itself can never save
the planet. We cannot even save ourselves.
But wait, there is more, still.
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What underlies our idolatry
As we begin to dig beneath the facade of shallow
niceties of our unreflective lives, we might intimate the
need for a more profound approach to living. We begin
to explore spirituality. Given our stress-filled and fast-
paced world, the high demand for quick fixes to our
mental burdens and existential angst is not surprising.
We see an explosion of new age modalities, exotic
eastern mysticism, body-bending and mind-contorting
yoga, Zen rogues in robes, and Tibetan lamas
marooned in ritual flamboyance or intellectual
gymnastics. Not to mention charismatic tele-
evangelists more interested in your money and
submission than your salvation. In our hunger and
longing for what will truly satisfy us, satisfying our
deepest needs for wholeness, liberation from captivity,
freedom from exile, homecoming and belonging, a
peace beyond all understanding, we forget the very
thing that ever will and wander aimlessly searching for
what never will. We forget the source of our life and
ground of our being. Our source and ground in our
Father who was, is, and always will be the absolute
fulfilment of all our longings and hopes.
We have but do not yet know the God-shaped hole in
our hearts. This inner void propels us to seek God in
all the wrong places, things and persons. The Creator
can never be conflated with the created. Whether we
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like it or not, whatever we think of God due to our life
tribulations, the fact remains that we long for all the
things that only God can provide. Thirsting for yet
resisting love. Hungering for warmth yet hardening our
frozen hearts. Longing for intimacy yet frightened of
the costs. Searching for yet not finding peace. Wanting
to be made whole yet lingering in brokenness.
Intimating that Grace awaits you yet shrinking back for
fear of losing yourself.
As a result, we distract ourselves. We fill our empty
lives with busyness, noise, social attachments,
ambitions, agendas, empire-building (material or
spiritual), cult personalities, gurus and masters - a
plethora of idols that capture and imprison us rather
then set us free. Is that all?
Idolatry of vested interests
No, we distract ourselves with consolations of multiple
lifetimes. That we will be reborn or reincarnated again and
again - for some a comforting thought, for others a
terrifying problem to be solved. I find the classic line of
Jack Nicholson playing the role of Edward Cole in "The
Bucket List" (a fine movie worth watching) to be salient
and spot-on. In the movie, Edward asked his friend Carter
Chambers (played by Morgan Freeman) what it takes for a
snail to climb up the evolutionary ladder if indeed the tale
of reincarnation is true. Whether he knows it or not (I
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suspect he does), Edward's skepticism poses a question
that threatens to punch a gaping hole in the rebirth
doctrine.
In the same vein, we can ask what it takes for a bacteria, a
virus, a cockroach, a rat, a giraffe, a flatworm for instance
to be reborn as a creature higher up in the pecking
order. And conversely, what atrocity or rottenness does a
human have to perform to be reborn as an E. Coli
bacterium as opposed to a phagocytotic single-celled
amoeba. One may sit on a high throne preaching the
'scientific' doctrine of rebirth to the masses but fail in
every way to account for the actual workings of karma or
rebirth in intelligible ways acceptable to the scientifically
informed community. If one is preaching as a religious
hawker, that is fine. But if one wishes to claim that this is
all 'science', grounded in 'reason' and 'logic', essential to
the identity of a world religion that seeks the truth, then
one runs into a problem at once intellectual and moral.
For a complex idolatry couching itself in the rhetoric of
multiple lifetimes may strike pseudo-scientific tones for
some but finally hits an intellectual ditch where answers
are scarce, evasive, or absent. Stock responses tout that
only fully enlightened beings can answer such tough
questions with specificity and accuracy. But are these
questions really that tough? Surely, they are merely the
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next logical line of questioning that follows standard
presentations of the rebirth doctrine!
For a religion or 'science' (as some proclaim) that proudly
defines itself by the use of 'logic' and 'reason' to arrive at
truth, it seems to me intellectually dishonest if not morally
suspect to promote an inexplicable grand narrative such as
rebirth with so much zeal yet so little credibility. A
'credibility' which is supposed to lend contemporary
relevance to such 'science'. The trouble is that this veneer
of 'credibility' hides an inconvenient truth. The truth about
the masked idolatry of vested religious, economic and
political interests shot through with hypocrisy and
intellectual bankruptcy.
Idolatry of meditative experience
As we go deeper into our spiritual lives, as we make
'progress' in our meditative lives, we start to
experience stuff. Heady stuff. Earthy stuff. Neurotic
stuff. Heavenly stuff. Mystical stuff. Enlightenment
stuff. We begin to feel vastly different than before. We
wallow in peaks of blissful oneness and depths of clear
insights. Depending on your spiritual ideology, you
may either conflate your very being with cosmic
consciousness, Self (atman), divine Being (brahman)
or think you have awakened to buddha-nature,
emptiness, the Tao, or even accomplished the rainbow
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body (which by the way is so fragile it requires
delicate environmental conditions for its manifest
transmutation from the coarse stinking dying body) or
think of your attainment in terms of some other
fanciful mystical permutations. Here is the catch. You
have just entangled yourself in arguably the most
subtle idolatry of all.
A hyper-spiritualised identity formed from self-
performance apart from the true ground of light, love
and life. The personal Triune ground that is immanent
in yet utterly transcendent to creation, irreducible to
creation (pantheism) or enclosing of creation
(panentheism). And certainly not some impersonal
truth or abstract principle that is subject to the control
of one's intellectual fabrication and emotional whim
and fancy. You see, it costs nothing for you to be made
one with impersonal cosmic consciousness or abstract
pure awareness or ineffable nirvana. It costs nothing
because there is no relationship.
Relationship requires that you give of yourself. And
relationship with God costs you everything. Ultimately,
in non-relational spiritual idolatry, you - the broken,
fallen you - remain in control despite your mistaken
assumption of self-transcendence. Even though in
reality you are not and have never been in control.
Rather, the sinful corruption within controls you.
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Whether you like it or not. Whether you know it or not.
Whether you are honest enough to admit it or not. And
that is the problem.
Idolatry from the beginning
That has been the problem from the beginning of
creation. The book of Genesis is a narrative of how our
rebellious rejection of God's presence and action in our
lives broke the fabric of the cosmos and ushered in
darkness both material and spiritual. We idolised our
selves. And out of that primordial idolatry comes death.
Death in our minds. Death in our hearts. Death of our
bodies. Death and despair.
Now you may say that I am being Exclusivist. Bigoted.
Dogmatic. Okay. But so are you. Our so-called
postmodern sensibility might delude us into a feel-
good 'all is truth' and 'all paths lead to Rome' mindset.
We might think that such a mindset is 'inclusive',
'universal', 'accepting', truly 'tolerant' of divergent
views. But I beg to differ. This mindset might well
prove to be the most insidiously intolerant and
exclusivist perspective of all. And hypocritical too.
Why? Because that very mindset of 'inclusivism'
excludes any view that claims to be the only
truth. That very mindset of 'universalism' is actually
rooted in presuppositions of effluent, white,
metropolitan, middle class, anglophonic society in
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modernity that perceives itself intellectually superior
to untamed others.
To claim as in the proverbial five blind men and the
elephant analogy that each of the diverse worldviews
does only grasp a part of the whole truth with each
equally valid to another is to implicitly claim that we
see sufficiently the whole elephant to tell others they
have only grasped its parts. How else can you make
such a claim except from a presumed vantage point of
objectivity that is in fact just as subjective? Sorry to
say but you are not standing on some neutral
epistemological ground that arbitrates all truths. Thus,
to spout such 'inclusivist' rhetoric is actually to
proclaim an underlying exclusivism that is hidden
beneath the rosy surface. And such exclusivism is
insidious for its hiddenness, hypocritical for its
proclamation otherwise, and is to my mind worse off
than if one is to make an exclusive truth claim
outrightly, honestly, truthfully. For we are all
exclusivists. We are all bigots. Let us admit it and get
on with it.
Be done with idolatry
One final thing to say. Some of you might know that I
have been a Buddhist teacher and meditation guide for
many years. Some of you might remember and perhaps
still experience the bewilderment and angst of seeing
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your Buddhist teacher fade into oblivion and emerge as
a Christian disciple and blogger. I'd like to invite you
to question your own assumptions. Your own clinging
to images and views. Let's put everything you've learnt
into action now. If you want to be Buddhist, let's be
Buddhist to the end. Let go of your images and
projections of your Buddhist teacher, his Buddhist
identity, and your own Buddhist identity. Are you
game enough to do that? Are you able to penetrate into
your own idolatry with the light of truth? The truth that
will set you free?
My friends, no one and no thing created on this earth
can set you free. Not even yourself. No saffron-robed
monk sequestered in Thai forests; no Zen patriarch
building his spiritual empire; no Tibetan lama
presiding over his feudal kingdom; no creaturely
human however 'enlightened'; not even the Buddha
himself. Even he needs saving.
Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord, my soul.
I will praise the Lord all my life;
I will sing praise to my God as long as I live.
Do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who
cannot save.
When their spirit departs, they return to the ground;
on that very day their plans come to nothing.
Blessed are those whose help is in the God of Jacob;
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whose hope is in the Lord their God.
He is the Maker of heaven and earth;
the sea, and everything in them - he remains faithful
for ever. (Psalm 146: 1-6)
Idolatry is idol worship. An idol is a created object that
has usurped the place of the Creator in our hearts.
Borrowing from Timothy Keller, an idol is a
'counterfeit god' so to speak.5 To worship is to ascribe
ultimate worth and value to a thing in such a way as to
be changed or transformed (as I once heard Timothy
Keller say). To ascribe such ultimate worth and value
to the multitude of idols in our lives is to open
ourselves to being changed. But changed in a bad way.
So bad as to spiral down into darkness and death. To
worship idols is to be changed in the direction of
captivity, exile, bondage, slavery. As is often said, the
door out of Hell is locked from the inside. We
effectively lock ourselves in Hell when we reject the
love, light and life of our redeeming and saving Lord.
Why do we keep locking ourselves in?
Stop rebelling now. Stop rejecting love. Let Him break
through into your heart. For He has done it all on the
cross. He has received the greatest abuse and evil just
to save us. He has come not to be served or prostrated
to, but to serve with all His heart. The King has
emptied Himself to be for, with, and as us. He who
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deserves all worship chose to wash His disciples' feet,
our feet. Let Him wash you now. Let Him love you
with an everlasting love. Let Him come into you now
and you shall never thirst again.
Only one God. One Lord. One Spirit. One Name. Jesus.
My friends, God is no longer unknown. No longer
impersonal. No longer distant.
He has a face.
The face of Jesus.
ה
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"Father, even as you draw us to Your Son and
Your Son reveals You to us as our Abba, may the Holy Spirit awaken us unto all the times we have idolised anything, anyone, even our very selves. Let us discern with ruthless honesty and wisdom the God-shaped hole in our hearts driving us to all sorts of idolatry that ultimately crush and deaden us. For what life is there in lifeless statues, monuments, ideologies, mental images, creaturely comforts, charismatic personalities, spiritual highs? Help us Lord to see Your face, as if for the first time, and let Your healing flow of love, life and light enter into our hopeless lives. Empower us to see and know You for who You really are - the King of kings and Lord of lords, our Saviour and Redeemer, our Lover and Friend. And as our restless hearts find their repose and rest in You, may we always be cradled in the unfailing embrace of your unending grace. In Jesus' name. Amen"
ה
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“Let Him break through into your heart. For He has done it all on the cross. He has received the greatest abuse and evil just to save us. He has come not to be served or prostrated to, but to serve with
all His heart.”
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Ten
SELF-EMPTYING LOVE OF CHRIST
God is good. And true. And ever so beautiful.
After months of prayerful waiting on the Lord, a
quickening has transpired in my soul. He has led me to
a new place to meet a new person this morning. The
place was The Old Franciscan Friary at the Brookfield
Centre for Christian Spirituality. A serene, translucent,
thinly-veiled place where the light and love of God
shines through. A cosy contemplative chapel sits in the
centre of the quiet green surrounds, where a Celtic
labyrinth on its side invites pilgrims to walk mindfully
from periphery into centre and out to the margins again
in full and constant relational presence of our Triune
God - the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit - in and
through Christ Jesus.
Here in this place, in God's embrace where all else
fades away, I sat in community with four Christian
brothers and sisters for a noon office at the chapel. We
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sat in contemplative silence; we prayed the sign of the
Cross and Our Father; we sang lovely liturgical songs
of worship; we read and reflected on the Word. And in
front of us was a beautiful mural of Christ with
stigmata in his hands amidst trees and birds. A simple
table with lit enclosed candles reminded us of the light
of the Spirit that forever shines, even into the darkest
recesses of our wounded hearts and broken world.
Irene led the noon office. It was an office in the Celtic
prayer tradition of Northumbria Community, a diverse,
worldwide, Christian community committed to a new
way of living.
The person was Dr. Irene Alexander, a psychologist
and spiritual director who teaches at Christian Heritage
College and Australian Catholic University. A loving,
nurturing, wise presence. An elder sister in Christ. A
new friend and mentor. We shared morning tea and a
long chat amidst the warm rays of the morning sun and
playfulness of the chirping birds. Some maintenance
work was going on but its sounds were muted to the
extent they disappeared for me as I plumbed deep into
the sacred space of luminous Spirit. A living sphere of
emotions and images that has no name. Cradled within
the strong gentle arms of our loving Lord. Transfigured
and healed by the immanent presence of a God who
suffers for, with, and as us, while eternally alive in
impassible repose.
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As I left The Old Franciscan Friary, I looked forward
to reading two of Irene's recent books - A Glimpse of
the Kingdom in Academia: Academic Formation as
Radical Discipleship (2013) and Practicing the
Presence of Jesus: Contemporary Meditation (2011).6
Her gift to me. A heart full and grateful. My heart. All
part of that deep interwoven mystery of new life freely
given to us by the self-emptying love of the Son, from
the Father, in the Spirit.
ה
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“I plumbed deep into the sacred space of luminous Spirit. A living sphere of emotions and images that has no name. Cradled within the strong gentle arms of
our loving Lord. Transfigured and healed by the immanent presence of a
God who suffers for, with, and as us, while eternally alive in impassible repose.”
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Eleven
PRACTICING THE PRESENCE OF JESUS
Meditation is not a technique. Meditation is not a science.
It is not even an art. Meditation in the biblical sense can
contain all these things but surpass them all in nature and
function. For biblical meditation is unapologetically
rooted in a loving awe-inspiring relationship with the
Person of God.
But take heed: as Christians we meditate not to gain
special favours from God, acquire spiritual prowess, or
develop spiritual merit on our side. We meditate as a
primordially spontaneous act of celebrating, delighting in,
rejoicing in our Triune God who first loved us and gave
Himself for us. We meditate to work out the salvation He
has first worked into us so we may grow into the likeness
of Christ by His grace in the Spirit.
In the last two chapters of this book, I’d like to share some
reflections on the practice of Christian meditation. I draw
inspiration from a number of Christian teachers on this
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rich and profound heart of Christian spirituality. For
example, St John of the Cross, Brother Lawrence, Thomas
Merton, Richard Foster, John Main, Thomas Keating,
Timothy Keller, and Irene Alexander. Thus, what I share
here may not be original in content. Yet, given my
unconventional pre-Christian history as a Buddhist
meditator, I may add nuance and inflexion to the practice
of Christian meditation in ways that are fresh and new.
To meditate well, we need to meditate consistently,
appealingly, attentively, heartfully, at times playfully, at
times seriously, but always devotionally. Strictly speaking,
practicing the presence of Jesus is non-meditation rather
than meditation. The word ‘meditation’ tends to suggest,
often mistakenly, the twin idea of technical achievement
and gruesome self-discipline. It also tends to convey an
ethereal sense of the mystical on the one hand and a
prosaic mindfulness of the everyday in another. Which of
these two senses prevail depends largely on one’s
predilection – spiritual or secular – and prior exposure to
the varying contexts of meditation.
Here, I wish to focus on biblical meditation which is in
essence gospel-centred, gospel-inspired, gospel-grounded
meditation in and through Christ. At first, such biblical
meditation takes place in a several relationship with Christ,
progresses through a several-and-joint relationship with
Christ, then culminates in a joint communion with the
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Triune God – Father through the Son in the Spirit. In this
chapter, I will share on the first two phases of such
relational biblical meditation. From the outset, practicing
the presence of Jesus steers clear of technical complexity,
rigid discipline, ethereal mysticism, and mundane
engrossment camouflaged as ‘mindfulness’. I will touch
on the culminative phase of biblical meditation in my next
and final chapter on Resting in Christ.
Meditation in the several
In my discussion on meditation, I draw on the relational
framework of ‘joint-and-several’ ably articulated by
Wilfred Yeo, my theological brother and friend in the
Spirit. To begin with, let me speak on meditation and
prayer in the ‘several’ relationship.
Practicing the presence of Jesus begins and ends with Him.
Remember this – it is not, never has been, nor will it ever
be about you, your achievement, or your merit. True
meditation begins and ends with Jesus. For Jesus is not
simply a sage, prophet, or spiritual master who dispenses
wise sayings and profound techniques for mind training.
Jesus does all that too but more.
Jesus is more, much more. Jesus in His very being is the
eternal Word (logos) of dynamic eloquence and creativity
who has become flesh as the incarnate Word, the Son of
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Man. Jesus is the Son in the triunity of God whose self-
emptying love poured out on us and brought us all into his
humanity. He emptied Himself to assume the fullness of
our humanity so that all of us with all our sin and
corruption, darkness and despair, can be unconditionally
assimilated by Him and totally redeemed, transmuted, and
overcome in and through Him. As a result, our meditation
and enlightenment are found in Him alone.
What this means is that at its very core, our practice of
meditation is not powered by our own egocentric efforts
but by the power (dunamis) of the Holy Spirit, the Spirit
of Jesus Christ. By His grace, we are each empowered to
meditate on Him, dialogue and commune with Him.
Further, the redemptive incarnation of Christ the Son has
made it possible for all of humanity and indeed of all
creation to be joined in relational oneness with the Triune
God in and through Christ. In other words, a new and right
relationship between created humanity and its Creator has
been established. This is an unprecedented, unrepeatable
redemptive act of God. A truth and mystery found only in
the gospel of Jesus Christ.
Thus, in the holy of holies of our bodily temple, we face
nakedly the holy trinity indwelling us in the Spirit and feel
Him nearer to us than our own breath, nay our own
consciousness itself. We imbibe the ceaselessly flowing
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meditation of Christ where love pours out inexorably from
each of the three Persons of Godhead to the other. Our
weak and failing meditation is made perfect by His
unfailing unsurpassed meditation in the ontological depths
of His Triune being.
Effulgent rays of His being that is wisdom illuminate the
darkened pits of our sinful nature, dispelling the darkness
of ignorance, error, corruption, and affliction. By His very
essence of wisdom, He enlightens us to Himself and
grants us saving knowledge of His Person. Throughout
His earthly ministry and at the cross of Calvary, we see
Jesus praying and meditating thoroughly and continuously
the Scripture which He knew so well. And because of His
perfect prayer and meditation, simply delighting in Him
and in what He has accomplished is enough for us to
receive the power and blessing of His consummate
meditation in the Law of the LORD.
In the several relationship, we as believers in Christ stand
separate from our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. In turn,
He stands apart from us in external relationality. Here, the
locative ‘apart’ and ‘external’ are relative terms. They do
not connote the sense of ‘being out there in the objective
world beyond our skin’. Rather, they point to an
epistemological sense of being experientially distinct and
separate from the presence of Jesus. In severalness, we can
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perceive Jesus as being physically out there or spiritually
in here, but always as a distinct personal presence separate
from our own individual presence.
Thus, as we pray the Scripture and meditate on key
biblical words and passages in severalness, we may catch
glimpses if not strong flashes of Christ’s presence replete
with insights, revelations or consolations. We feel His
warm loving gaze and tender sweet touch, even as His
dazzling wisdom illumines us into wakefulness. Like the
disciple who fell asleep in the garden of Gethsemane
being woken up by our Lord’s commanding voice, we
may be startled into mindfulness by Jesus, the living
source and ground of unconfined naked wakefulness, ever
fresh, ever present, ever merciful.
When we open our senses to marvel at the wonders of
nature – birds chirping, leaves falling, sun shining,
dewdrops on a lotus leaf, a tracery of trees against the sky,
a gurgling mountain stream – we may find ourselves
catching fire as the Lord blazes through all these natural
wonders to touch our cold freezing hearts. A related
practice is what the Ignatians call the Prayer of Examen.
In this practice, we consciously and intentionally look out
for the rising flow of life in every moment, every activity,
every situation. Each expansion of life is a mark of His
loving creative presence. The more we prayerfully relish
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in His life in all things, the more we are enabled to grow
into who He wants us to be.
Friends, this is not just an act of mindful attention. Nor is
this an event of thinking into feeling. Rather, this is a
sudden unexpected breaking through by our ever lovely
Jesus into the prosaic rhythm of our everyday lives. How
do we know it is Jesus?
By His unmistakable resonance. His sweet tender warmth
that cradles all that we are – good, bad, and ugly, His
piercing gaze that reveals all that we were, are, and ever
will be. His commanding voice that is at once gentle and
disarming. His fiery touch that sets our hearts ablaze with
liquid heat pulsating in all directions. His total conformity
with Scriptural testimonies of who He is, what He did, and
how He did them. His direct, sharp, and immediate
penetration into our souls conferring biblical truths that
awaken and change us forever. And more. But I shall
desist from speaking here.
What happens as we are known and touched by Jesus is
that we fall on our face. Not literally but existentially.
Although physically and literally falling on our face is not
precluded. There is no other response, no sane response
except to fall on our face and surrender ourselves to Him,
the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last, the author
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and finisher of all works. We fall into worship. This is
what can happen at this point in our meditation, as we
practice the presence of Jesus in our daily lives.
Beholding the sweet presence of Jesus dynamically
conforms us closer and closer to the image and likeness of
our Lord. As we remember to cast our loving attentiveness
on Jesus in our every act, in every moment, in any
situation placid or turbulent, we abide more and more
deeply in a flow of faith and devotion. We intuit more
clearly what it is like to flow in the “unforced rhythms of
grace”.7
We open ourselves to the sanctifying influence and
presence of Christ in our lives. For though in our identity
we are sanctified in Christ through the finished work of
His entire life’s cross, we remain to be sanctified in
experience and behaviour – an eschatological reality
waiting to be made present, a ‘not-yet’ waiting to become
‘now’. Even so, the ‘now’ matters for the ‘not yet’.
Meditation in the several-and-joint
The several-and-joint relationship is unique to the internal
relationality of the Triune God, whose three Persons
Father, Son and Spirit relate jointly and severally to each
other. In the joint, the three Persons are relationally One.
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In the several, the three Persons are relationally Three.
Thus, the Triune One is simultaneously Three and One in
the several-and-joint relationship.
When the Son, the eternal logos, became flesh at the
Incarnation, a new relationship between creation-humanity
and the Triune God was established. This was the
inception of the several-and-joint relationship between
God and creation-humanity, an unprecedented and
unrepeated event that shook the entire cosmos. For the
first time since Creation, God bestowed upon His entire
creation and humanity a new kind of relationship between
He and them.
This is at once a new and a right relationship between
Creator and created, a restoration of righteousness to
humanity such that we are made right in our relationship
with our Creator and Father. The Son of God who emptied
Himself to become Son of Man effectively took all of us -
our entire humanity - into His very being. Just as He
partook of our human nature, we now can partake of His
divine nature and conjoined intimacy with the Father and
Spirit in and through Christ, our Lord and Saviour.
Thus, in this new righteous several-and-joint relationship
with God, we are given the privilege and honour of
delighting in His presence and action beyond what is
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possible as created beings epistemologically separate from
Him. Now, because of the incarnate Christ, we can do so
in joint oneness with God through Christ in the Spirit.
And because of the crucified Christ, we can enjoin our
Father without the burden and scourge of sin, corruption,
darkness, and death which have been dealt with by Christ
in the depths of His humanity. We are no longer under the
dominion of our sinful nature and actions.
With the ascended Christ, we can claim our citizenship in
the kingdom of heaven where love, belonging, justice,
peace prevail. Our joint oneness with Him places us in and
with Him at the right hand of the Father on the throne of
grace. While we can partake in a spiritual ascension in
Christ right now, we eschatologically await the real and
effectual ascension at a time He ordains.
Right now, we are enabled and empowered to pray,
meditate (discursively), and contemplate (receptively) as
part of a dynamic interplay between our several and joint
relational oneness with God. As we settle our fragmented
selves and start attending to the presence of Jesus, we lay
hold of our several relationship with God in the first
instance to then move restfully towards increasing joint
oneness. This movement of our spirit towards joint
oneness occurs supernaturally without self-coercion or
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self-conscious effort. As our hearts are fixed on Jesus and
our gaze turned to Him in loving worship, we are
inexplicably drawn deeper into ever-increasing joint
oneness with and in Him. The epistemological distance
between the prayee and the Lord diminishes. Just as
inexplicably as we move into oneness, we also move out
from oneness into severalness of prayee and Christ. The
agentlessly spontaneous inflow and outflow of relational
oneness marks our prayerful meditation at this stage.
In the Christian tradition, especially in the Benedictine
order, a powerful and time-tested way of prayerful
meditation on the Scripture can be found in lectio divina.
(Latin for "divine reading"). Lectio divina involves
scriptural reading, meditation, and prayer aimed at
promoting communion with God and to increase the
knowledge of God's written and living Word.
Traditionally, there are four separate steps to lectio divina:
read (lectio); meditate (meditatio); pray (oratio); and
contemplate (contemplatio). In practicing lectio divina, we
first read a scriptural passage attentively, reflect upon
what we have read, pray to God in dialogue, and
contemplate on the written Word of God. The approach is
contemplative and engaged rather than theological and
analytical, keeping Christ as the focus of meaning in the
texts. The prayee seeks to ‘enter’ deeply into a living
experience of the words of Scripture rather than standing
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at the fringe in objective analysis. This form of meditative
prayer can lead to an increased knowledge of Christ, not
by accumulation of conceptual knowledge but by a sense
of increasing personal intimacy.
In lectio divina, I find the dialectical movement between
the several and joint perspectives to be in full display. One
begins as a prayee severally apart from the story of
Scripture but gradually moves ever deeper into joint
oneness with Christ in the Scripture. As one enters into the
world of various characters in the bible narratives apart
from Jesus, one also immerses in joint oneness with them
in and through Christ who makes such a relationship
possible. Irene Alexander, in her prayerfully meditative
book Practicing the Presence of Jesus, writes honestly and
beautifully of the many ways we can do precisely that,
sharing her own experiences of this profound practice.
In modern times, Christian Meditation (CM) pioneered by
Benedictine monk John Main and Centering Prayer (CP)
taught by Cistercian monk Thomas Keating and Trappist
monks William Meninger and Basil Pennington are two
further examples of Christian contemplative prayer that
have become popular.8 Tracing their roots to 4
th century St
John Cassian and the Desert Fathers through Benedictine
lectio divina and works like The Cloud of Unknowing and
writings of St Teresa of Avila and St John of the Cross,
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the methods of Christian Meditation and Centering Prayer
do also owe their emergence from contact with Asian
spiritual traditions like Buddhism and Hinduism.
In my view, while superficial similarities exist between
these Christian meditations and Asian practices, deep
divergences are found in terms of their underlying
theology and insights. For Christians, the practice of CM
and CP needs to be contextualised within the Trinitarian
faith. From the Trinitarian standpoint, the effective power
of spiritual transformation is founded in the Holy Trinity
indwelling us all.
The Triune God is not and can never be the same as other
mystical ultimates found in other religions. Given His
utter ontological transcendence vis-a-vis the whole of
creation, His presence in our lives requires that any
breakthrough into history must be a pure initiative from
His side alone. For that simple reason, the biblical God
can never be conflated with Asian representations of the
ultimate mystery rooted in pantheistic or panentheistic
ontologies alien to the Gospel.
That said, methods of CM and CP involve the application
of a sacred word (such as Jesus, Lord, shalom etc.) though
each in their distinctive ways. For CM, the sacred word is
consistently applied like an Asian religious mantra in
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tandem with breathing. For CP, the sacred word is applied
more loosely and spontaneously as a sign of one’s assent
to the presence and action of God in one’s being.
In both cases, the aim is not to develop this or that quality
of consciousness or to generate this or that spiritual merit,
but rather to delight in a growing relational intimacy with
God while allowing our majestic loving Lord to heal,
grow, transform us from glory to glory into His likeness
and image. As we grow in an ever deepening relationship
with God, what we might call ‘spiritual qualities’ like love,
kindness, patience, stillness, discernment will sprout and
grow strong in us by the power of the Holy Spirit. As we
consistently walk on this journey of grace and truth, we
begin to bear fruit of the Spirit as Paul describes in
Galatians 5:22-23.9
Friends, there is much richness and depth in the Christian
contemplative and prayer tradition that deserves to be far
more widely known and practiced. For me, a well-orbed
Christian spirituality includes a number of key streams.
Richard J. Foster and James Bryan Smith call them (1) a
prayer-filled life; (2) a virtuous life; (3) a Spirit-
empowered life; (4) a compassionate life; and (5) a Word-
centred life.10
These five streams correspond to the five
great traditions of Christian life and faith namely
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Contemplative, Holiness, Charismatic, Social Justice, and
Evangelical.
Much remains to be explored. For now, we will pause for
a moment to behold our Lord in silent wonder and loving
gaze.
May our practice of the presence of Jesus reveal to us so
much of His grace and tender mercy that our hearts will
finally find their rest in Christ.
ה
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“But take heed: as Christians we meditate not to gain special favours from God, acquire spiritual prowess, or develop spiritual merit on our side. We
meditate as a primordially spontaneous act of celebrating, delighting in, rejoicing in our
Triune God who first loved us and gave Himself for us.”
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Twelve
RESTING IN CHRIST
Now is the time. Here is the place.
To worship our majestic God. To fall on our face in His
mighty presence. We have traversed the prayerful journey
of meditating in the several, then the several-and-joint,
and now into the communion of joint oneness in the Holy
Trinity, in whom we dwell and who dwells in us.
Praying and meditating in the joint oneness of and in our
Triune God takes some gumption. Joint-oneness prayer
takes energy, faithfulness, devotion, a loving tender heart
softened by His grace and mercy. Once again, I thank
Wilfred Yeo for his insightful sharing on this profound
and unashamedly relational dimension of prayer.
When you hear ‘gumption’, you might understandably
think that this kind of prayerful meditation is tedious and
onerous. It may not sound like fun. But actually, it is not
like that at all. Yes, energy is required but energy is
supplied by, in and through Christ in the Spirit. Thus, we
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only have to remember that it is not our ego-centric energy
that is at play here. Releasing all tinges of self-effort and
self-performance is crucial in prayerful resting in Christ.
But given our habitual rebellious independence and blind
sidedness, we may find ourselves tied up into knots in
attempting to ‘do’ resting in Christ.
My first piece of advice: let go of that idea of ‘doing’; let
be in naturalness and wakefulness; let Christ meditate in
you as you rest in His eternal repose in the Triune Mystery
indwelling you. Stop seeing yourself as the ‘doer’ or
‘meditator’ or ‘prayee’ and simply consent to the Lord’s
presence and action within you.
Let God be God. Let you be you.
Talk to Him. Hear Him speak, Respond in love.
As we move gradually and supernaturally from a sense of
separative severalness in prayer through an increasingly
sense of joint oneness with God, it is possible that we find
strange things happening in and to us. Strange sensations
in the body that may feel deeply consoling or acutely
painful. Strange feelings and unexpected emotions rising
in the heart. Strange thoughts and chaotic images whirling
in the mind while you remain uninvolved and unaffected.
In many ways, these occurrences are not unique to
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Christian prayer and meditation. Manuals of Buddhist and
Hindu meditation practices describe many of these strange
psychosomatic events in great detail. But there is no need
to be unduly fascinated by them. Nor is it beneficial to do
so. In fact, paying attention to such events distracts you
from the real practice and lands you in a blind alley.
Remain steadfast in the love of our Lord.
From accounts of contemplatives, it seems that as your
meditation effortlessly deepens and this can only happen
when one’s effort becomes so balanced that it starts to
seem effortless, you may enter into stillness and joy
beyond anything you have ever experienced before.
Consciousness is awake, clear, relaxed, blissful. And such
a consciousness can have ever deepening levels, each
more subtle in texture and quality than the preceding one.
It is incredibly tempting to latch onto these states and
appropriate them for our egotistic agendas. That would be
a big mistake. Release them. Release your clinging and
move on with a light touch.
Stepping aside these meditative sideshows, however
pleasant or seemingly profound, you call upon the Lord
with all your heart. You call not from self-inflation or
deflation but as a spontaneous outpouring of the love He
has first planted in us through His self-emptying
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incarnation. Christ’s kenosis makes us full. And as we
empty ourselves of everything that seeks to thwart the
place of Christ in our being, we are radically ‘kenotised’
only to be filled anew by the pleroma of Christ’s
inexhaustible grace, love, wisdom, mercy. His perfections
begin to seep into our present reality, transfiguring our
brokenness and enlightening our inner darkness.
In the ontological depths of Christ’s humanity, we partake
of His divinity even though we forever remain creaturely
beings apart from our absolute Creator. This is the
mystery of the ages, that we have open access to our
Triune God’s divine nature in and through Christ and by
our lives being hidden with Christ in God. We approach
the joint-oneness of prayer and meditation. We come to
the dimensionless ground of contemplation.
The length, breadth, height, and depth of contemplation is
not something we can easily measure. In fact, it would be
true to say that contemplation transcends calculation by
the analytical mind. Conceptual and linguistic constructs
lose their hold in this atemporal, nonlocal ground.
Absolute silence, illumination, joy and love prevail. Make
no mistake though, that this seemingly transcendent
ground of contemplation is a sign of our ontological union
with God. Not at all. If anything, it is simply a foretaste of
the unspeakable absolute interiority of the Holy Trinity as
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reflected in the mirror of our limited conscious being. Yet,
because of the unimaginable expanse, richness, and depth
of God’s being (ousia) and activity (energeia), our
microcosmic experience of His unfathomable plenitude
can only but feel limitless in taste and texture. Thus, our
contemplation merely reflects a minuscule quantum of
God’s absolute interiority that is full and emptying, empty
and filling, a dazzling darkness more luminous than
anything perceivable or conceivable yet more hidden than
any treasure submerged in the darkest cavern.
Martin Laird, a contemporary American contemplative
scholar, writes elegantly about how deep prayerful
meditation can allow consciousness to settle into its own
luminous silence, an existential posture of open clarity
where the domination of egocentric agendas fade away:
“Shift your awareness from the distraction to the
awareness itself, to the aware-ing. There is nothing
but this same luminous vastness, this depthless depth.
What gazes into luminous vastness is itself luminous
vastness. There is not a separate self who is afraid or
angry or jealous, etc., just luminous, depthless depth
gazing into luminous, depthless depth”11
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The late Trappist monk Thomas Merton (1915-68) has
written evocatively and beautifully about contemplation.
Here are some of his eloquent passages:
“Contemplation is the highest expression of man’s
intellectual and spiritual life. It is that life itself, fully
awake, fully active, fully aware that it is alive. It is
spiritual wonder. It is spontaneous awe at the
sacredness of life, of being. It is gratitude for life, for
awareness and for being. It is vivid realisation of the
fact that life and being in us proceed from an
invisible, transcendent, and infinitely abundant
Source. Contemplation is, above all, awareness of the
reality of that Source”12
“Contemplation is also the response to a call: a call
from Him Who has no voice, and yet Who speaks in
everything that is,and Who, most of all, speaks in the
depths of our own being: for we ourselves are words
of His. But we are words that are meant to respond to
Him, to answer to Him, to echo Him, and even in
some way to contain Him and signify Him.
Contemplation is this echo. It is a deep resonance in
the inmost center of our spirit in which our very life
loses its separate voice and re-sounds with the
majesty and the mercy of the Hidden and Living
One.… It is as if in creating us God asked a question,
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and in awakening us to contemplation He answered
the question, so that the contemplative is at the same
time, question and answer.”13
Exquisite words indeed. And much to reflect upon.
Merton also wrote about the holiness and sanctity that
appears to come from our contemplative practice. But he
is careful to stress that such holiness is ultimately
grounded in God alone:
“If, then, we want to seek some way of being holy, we
must first of all renounce our own way and our own
wisdom. We must ‘empty ourselves’ as He did. We
must deny ourselves and in some sense make
ourselves ‘nothing’ in order that we may live not so
much in ourselves as in Him. We must live by a
power and a light that seem not to be there. We must
live by the strength of an apparent emptiness that is
always truly empty and yet never fails to support us
at every moment. This is holiness”14
Again, he says the same for sanctity:
“None of this can be achieved by any effort of my
own, by striving of my own, by any competition with
other men. It means leaving all the ways that men
can follow or understand. I who am without love
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cannot become love unless Love identifies me with
Himself. But if He sends His own Love, Himself, to
act and love in me and in all that I do, then I shall be
transformed, I shall discover who I am and shall
possess my true identity by losing myself in Him. And
that is what is called sanctity”15
St John of the Cross (1542-91) was a Spanish mystic,
Catholic saint, and Carmelite friar and priest who was
important in the Counter-Reformation movement. Along
with St Teresa of Avila, he is considered a founder of the
Discalced Carmelite Order. In his famous works Ascent to
Mount Carmelite and Dark Night of the Soul, St John of
the Cross wrote powerfully of the contemplative journey
leading to experiential union with God – a journey
nurtured by the loving grace of God like a mother tends
her only child:
“Into this dark night souls begin to enter when God
draws them forth from the state of beginners - which
is the state of those that meditate on the spiritual
road - and begins to set them in the state of
progressives - which is that of those who are already
contemplatives - to the end that, after passing
through it, they may arrive at the state of the perfect,
which is that of the Divine union of the soul with
God. … The loving mother is like the grace of God,
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for, as soon as the soul is regenerated by its new
warmth and fervour for the service of God, He treats
it in the same way; He makes it to find spiritual milk,
sweet and delectable, in all the things of God,
without any labour of its own, and also great
pleasure in spiritual exercises, for here God is giving
to it the breast of His tender love, even as to a tender
child.”16
In a late 14th
century anonymous text on Christian
contemplative prayer The Cloud of Unknowing, the author
suggests a way of glimpsing the nature of God through
abandoning all consideration of God’s activities and
attributes and surrendering the mind and ego to the realm
of “unknowing” through love:
“… but of God Himself can no man think. And
therefore I would leave all that thing that I can think,
and choose to my love that thing that I cannot think.
For why; He may well be loved, but not thought. By
love may He be gotten and holden; but by thought
never. And therefore, although it be good sometime
to think of the kindness and the worthiness of God in
special, and although it be a light and a part of
contemplation: nevertheless yet in this work it shall
be cast down and covered with a cloud of forgetting.
And thou shalt step above it stalwartly, but mistily,
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with a devout and a pleasing stirring of love, and try
for to pierce that darkness above thee. And smite
upon that thick cloud of unknowing with a sharp dart
of longing love; and go not thence for thing that
befalleth.”17
When one reaches this stage of contemplation, a forgetting
of all that is not God and that distracts one from full
attentiveness of God is necessary. A forgetting of words
and concepts that clutter the mind goes hand in hand with
a piercing love of the heart that bursts forth to hold God,
however impossible that may seem. For God can never be
grasped by thought. But love calls forth God’s response. It
is part of that same love that has loved us to the point of
death, the love of Jesus Himself that fires up our hearts up
to love in return.
Not that we can ever return the favour but we nevertheless
feel irresistibly drawn to give of ourselves in reciprocal
love. And in loving without holding back or being held
back by thick conceptual elaborations, we penetrate the
mystery of God’s being.
It is important we do not overlook the preceding steps of
the practice of contemplation. Prior to arriving at a joint
oneness of prayer and meditation with, in and through
Christ, it is imperative we fully engage our senses and
intellect as we meditate and pray the written Word of God.
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Scriptural meditation, for example via lectio divina, is
core biblical exercise and must never be relegated to a
secondary place. We do not regard wordless
contemplation as superior to or more advanced than
Word-centred, Word-directed, Word-shaped meditation.
On the contrary, both discursive and non-discursive prayer,
constructive and receptive meditation are complementary
aspects of a well-orbed spiritual practice. As Christians,
we need to remember this point.
A few final words. Settling down to prayer and meditation
in the course of a busy, highly-strung, distracted lifestyle
in our high-demand society is not easy, to say the least.
Our best intentions often get waylaid by the turbulence of
life. Or we feel so used to the sensuality and stimulation of
unreflective living that stilling oneself in meditative prayer
feels like a boring chore. I can understand and relate to
that. Yet, there remains a still small voice within us that
beckons us to a more profound relationship with our Lord.
We feel inexplicably drawn, as if by a spell but in a good
way, towards the loveliness of our Jesus who has finished
His work for us. He came, He lived, He taught, He
embodied what He taught. He was rejected, scorned,
beaten, tortured, scourged, and nailed to a cross for us. He
bled for us even as His body was broken for us. In this is
love indeed, not that we love God but that He loved us
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first, loved us so much that He sent His Son to be our
redemption, justification, and salvation.
Every time we remember this truth of Jesus, our hearts
must surely melt as we fall on our faces, bow our knees,
and confess with our tongues and our souls, that Jesus
Christ is Lord, Saviour, and King.
***
As we meditate on Scripture into a natural warm silence,
our consciousness settles into its luminous vastness, its
depthless depths. And as we repeatedly consent to the
presence and action of the Triune God in our lives, we
release all extraneous chatter slowing images to dissolve
in their own place. As the space of our consciousness gets
increasingly clear and open, all inner events naturally self-
liberate in a flow of naked luminosity. We gradually,
graciously, imperceptibly get magnetised into an ever-
deepening presence and love that is gentle yet strong. It is
as if love and awareness meld into an incandescent living
flame calling upon Jesus, our God.
In that moment of blazing love, we feel no other choice
except to meditate on Him till our hearts are on fire in
intense passion and unquenchable longing. It is a
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passionate longing big and powerful enough to direct our
whole being towards unceasing prayer bathed in light.
We pray with words and with groanings of the Spirit. We
speak with spontaneous utterances of the soul and listen
with uncompromising silence to His finest whispers.
Every whisper, every paean of love from Him, even every
rebuke or conviction is a delight to be relished and a
treasure to be received with infinite joy.
In the end, words must fail. But words do matter. And we
would do well to embrace both words and wordlessness to
come before the Word incarnate in Christ Jesus who will
come again to set all things right and make all things new.
Even so, come, Lord Jesus, come!
ה
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REFERENCES
1 – See Timothy Keller, Walking with God through Pain and
Suffering. (London: Hodder and Stoughton, 2013).
2 – Masao Abe, “Kenotic God and Dynamic Sunyata” in
Christopher Ives (ed.) Divine Emptiness and Historical Fullness: A Buddhist Jewish Christian Conversation with Masao Abe. (Valley
Forge: Trinity Press International, 1995).
3 – Personal conversation with Wilfred Yeo (Brisbane: 2015).
4 – I am indebted to Thomas F. Torrance for these terms enousios
logos and enousios energeia which can be found in his The
Trinitarian Faith: The Evangelical Theology of the Ancient Catholic
Church. (Edinburgh: T & T Clark, 1993).
5 – See Timothy Keller, Counterfeit Gods: When the Empty
Promises of Love, Money and Power Let You Down. (London:
Hodder and Stoughton, 2009).
6 – Irene Alexander, A Glimpse of the Kingdom: Academic
Formation as Radical Discipleship. Eugene, Oregon: Cascade
Books, 2013; and Irene Alexander, Practicing the Presence of Jesus:
Contemporary Meditation. (Eugene, Oregon: Wipf and Stock, 2011).
7 – From Eugene H. Peterson’s paraphrase of Matthew 11:29
(MSG). The Message: The Bible in Contemporary Language. (Carol Stream, IL: NavPress, 2005).
8 – See e.g. Peter Ng (ed.), The Hunger for Depth and Meaning: Learning to Meditate with John Main. (Singapore: Medio Media,
2007); and Thomas Keating, Intimacy with God: An Introduction to
Centering Prayer. (New York: Crossroad Publishing Company,
2009).
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9 – In Galatians 5:22-23, the fruit of the Spirit consists of love, joy,
peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
10 – Richard J. Foster and James Bryan Smith (eds.), Devotional Classics: Selected Readings for Individuals and Groups. (London:
Hodder and Stoughton, 1993).
11 – Martin Laird, Into the Silent Land: A Guide to the Practice of
Christian Meditation. (New York: Oxford University Press, 2006),
92.
12 – Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation. (New York:
New Directions Books, 1972), 1.
13 – Ibid., 3.
14 – Ibid., 62.
15 – Ibid., 63.
16 – St John of the Cross, Dark Night of the Soul. (Grand Rapids, MI: Christian Classics Ethereal Library), 17.
17 – Taken from The Cloud of Unknowing edited with introduction
by Evelyn Underhill (London: John M. Watkins, 1922), 28.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Chris Kang is a Christian theologian and contemplative. He has
lectured at The University of Queensland in Brisbane, Australia and
Nan Tien Institute in Wollongong, Australia. From 1997, he has
taught Buddhist meditation practices and led meditation retreats
until his encounter with Christ in 2014. He is author of several
books, including Reclaiming the Dhamma: Teachings on Critical
Buddhism (2014), Dhamma Stream: A Garland of Writings on
Dhamma, Self and Society (2013) and Wise Mind Warm Heart
(2010). He is co-editor of The Meditative Way: Readings in the
Theory and Practice of Buddhist Meditation (1997).