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An Invitationto Meet with God

Dr. Malcolm Gill

I n s I g h t f o r L I v I n g A u s t r A L I A

Prayer

CONTENTS

Introduction 1

CHAPTER ONE

The Problem of Prayer 5

CHAPTER TWO

The Priority of Prayer in the Life of Jesus 11

CHAPTER THREE

The Purpose of Prayer 17

CHAPTER FOUR

The Pattern of Prayer 25

CHAPTER FIVE

The Practice of Prayer 41

CHAPTER SIX

Where to from Here? 50

Prayer: An Invitation to Meet with God

Paperback Edition

English

Copyright © 2011

by Dr. Malcolm Gill, B.A. (hons) Moody Bible Institute

Th.M (hons), Ph.D Dallas Theological Seminary

Published by Insight for Living Inc. (Australia)

PO Box 443 Boronia, Victoria, Australia 3155

www.insight.asn.au

Edition 2, Printing 1

ISBN 978-0-9758368-4-2

Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by

permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All Rights Reserved.

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Design, editing and production: Insight for Living AustraliaCover Design: Wanda Skattebo

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Printed in Australia

1

Several years ago I watched a classic American movie titled A Christmas Story. The film follows the life of a boy named Flick who has the grand desire to receive a Red Ryder BB Gun on Christmas day. While I don’t remember much about the movie, there is one particularly humorous scene that is etched in my memory. In this scene Flick, out of pure curiosity, decides to see how cold the school flagpole is. As the scene begins he walks through the icy school playground and sizes up the pole. He pauses, thinks about it and then, almost in slow motion, he opens his mouth and pokes out his tongue until it touches the frozen metal. The result of Flick’s experiment was not what he or I expected. His tongue ended up firmly fastened to the pole. Flick was stuck.

As I watched the actions of Flick I began to chuckle. What a silly thing to do. As if that would really happen? Why would someone lick a flagpole, and even if they did, would a tongue really stick? A few days after watching this movie I found myself still running over this scene in my head. I was in Year 8 at high school and I was semi-aware of the scientific forces involved in Flick’s experiment. I believed in my head that what Flick did probably would occur in real life, but in my heart I wasn’t quite sure.

So in my teenage wisdom I decided to do my own little experiment. In order to gauge the validity of the truth that frozen metal would really stick to a warm tongue I took a large metal spoon and placed it in the freezer. After a few days I returned to the freezer and took out the spoon. As I looked it over, my mind replayed the scene of young Flick stuck

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.

Colossians 4:2

Introduction


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is something I know cognitively I should do but in reality it is something I often don’t do.

Prayer, for many of us, is a challenging discipline. We want to pray, we plan to pray, we talk about prayer, yet we still struggle to do it. What compounds our frustration even more is that we feel guilty or weak for not practising this discipline. If you are anything like me then you have probably heard multiple exhortations through your Christian life that you should be a person of prayer. The truth is, however, for all the talk about prayer, very little praying is done. Even at prayer meetings we often spend much of the time talking about prayer requests, but little time actually praying.

Chances are if you’re reading this, you have an interest in prayer. If so, I’m glad. Whether you are a new Christian who would like to know the basics of how to pray or you are a long-term follower of Jesus who is still wrestling with the hard work of prayer, this book is for you. Most of us would like to improve our prayer lives. In fact in my years of ministry I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who has been satisfied with the depth of their prayer life. Prayer is a challenge, but as we’ll discover prayer can be a fruitful and joyous experience as we learn to meet intimately with God.

Introduction

to the pole. I believed in my head that his story was true, but that truth didn’t seem to register in my experience. So without thinking anymore, I poked out my tongue and slapped it against the frozen spoon.

Had anybody noticed what I’d done they would have seen a humorous sight similar to that of Flick and the flagpole. Here was a teenage boy with a large spoon, with nothing on it, stuck to his tongue and lips!

As I stood there with the frozen spoon gripping my mouth I realised that what I knew to be true in my head should have prompted me to respond in a different manner rather than what I was experiencing. I realised that it is not just enough to know something is true, one must also act appropriately on the basis of such truth. Unfortunately for me the difference between what I knew in my head and what I knew in practice became readily apparent.

I was gripped with panic and ripped the spoon off without much thought. The spoon did come off, but unfortunately so did most of my tongue! While my tongue experiment at one level proved to be a failure, at another level it provided me an important insight into life. I discovered in an obvious way that I need to match what I know is true in my head with actions that are consistent to such truth. It is one thing to believe in truth at a mental level, but I need to act and live in light of such truth in my experience.

As I have grown in my experience with God I feel that my prayer life often, unfortunately, reflects what happened in my failed science experience. For many years I have known the truth that prayer is important, necessary and vital to the Christian life, yet I struggle to express that reality in my day-to-day life. To me, prayer, like eating vegetables or doing exercise,

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CHAPTER ONE

Growing up I enjoyed not only playing sports, but also watching them on television. In particular, I have many fond memories of watching Friday night football games with my dad.

A few years ago I remember watching my dad in his usual form. He and I were sitting in our comfortable seats in the lounge room watching one particular game where the match was being played in the rain. As the heavens opened and the players ran around getting drenched my dad would give his own ‘expert’ analysis of the game. “Pass the ball,” he’d cry. “Johns, you’re a glory hound.” “That referee is blind.” “I wouldn’t have kicked it there, that was ridiculous.” My dad’s insightful comments were always fun.

The reality was, however, apart from playing a handful of games at primary school, my dad was not an actual player. He could talk like an expert, offer suggestions as an expert, and even appear to the unfamiliar as quite knowledgeable. The reality, however, was that he was an armchair professional. He was not on the field getting dirty and tired, he was comfortably sitting in a chair with his feet up enjoying a warm cup of coffee!

In a similar vein, many of us are like this with prayer. We love to talk about prayer. We will have prayer requests, attend prayer meetings, assure people we’re “praying” for them, and yet often we’re not on the field of prayer toughing it out. We have the aspiration, but in practice we are neither fit nor able. We talk about prayer, but just don’t do it. But why not? Why is prayer such hard work?

4

Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.

Matthew 26:41

The Problem of Prayer


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interruption. Prayer is alien to our proud human nature.”

We often don’t pray because we are so busy trying to do things, sometimes even for God, that we fail to engage with God himself. We ignore praying to God because we are just too busy.

3. We are too lazy to pray.

If you’re anything like me you’ve tried different times and different ways of praying but inevitably they end in the mind wandering to other things or even worse, the mind switching off as you fall asleep.

Many times I’ve resolved to begin a new season of life committed to waking up early to spend time in prayer, only for my aching body to overrule my spiritual desire. As a result I feel it is just too much work to pray and as a result my efforts and enthusiasm melt away and I cease to talk with God.

We often don’t pray because we are spiritually apathetic and lazy.

4. We question the power of prayer.

How many of us have had times where we’ve gone to God in prayer only to feel like we are mouthing words that we are not sure God even hears, let alone takes an interest in? We pray and yet things seem to remain the same. Situations seem hopeless and while we know we should commit ourselves to God in prayer, we often lack confidence that our prayers will make any sort of difference to the larger outcomes of life. The result of our doubtful attitudes towards prayer’s power ultimately prevails when we cease to talk with God at all.

We often don’t pray because we question its power.

Chapter One: The Problem of Prayer

There are several reasons why we might find prayer difficult.

1. We don’t know how to pray.

Many of us, even from a young age, have heard from both the pulpit and fellow Christians the exhortation, “you need to pray to grow in Christ”. While that refrain has often been well intentioned, it has seldom been followed up with suggestions on how to go about the task. As a result many of us have been burdened by guilt knowing we should pray, but in a real sense left feeling like we are in the dark because we are not sure how to do what is being asked. In my own experience, I have more than once attempted to develop my prayer life only to wonder what I’m actually meant to be doing.

We often don’t pray because we are not sure what we are doing or we have a lack of clarity as to its purpose.

2. We are too busy to pray.

In a world of hustle and bustle we have the ingrained belief that success in life depends upon our own ability to problem solve and provide answers. This self-dependence leads to a busyness in life that cuts God out of our moment-to-moment activities.

In his book, Too Busy Not to Pray, author Bill Hybels picks up on this problem of self-dependence when he comments:

“Prayer is an unnatural activity. From birth we have been learning the rules of self-reliance and struggle to achieve self-sufficiency. Prayer flies in the face of those deep-seated values. It is an assault on human autonomy, and an indictment of independent living. To people in the fast lane, determined to make it on their own, prayer is an embarrassing


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2. Why do you think prayer feels “unnatural”?

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3. Finish this prayer, “Heavenly Father, help me with my prayer life because…”

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Chapter One: The Problem of Prayer

Prayer is often difficult. You and I might refrain from prayer for any or all of the above reasons. We might not pray because we don’t feel like we know what we are trying to achieve. We might neglect prayer on the basis of busyness or even worse laziness. We might ignore prayer because we doubt its effectiveness.

In spite of the challenges and difficulties prayer presents to us, I believe it is not enough just to make excuses. While you and I can, and often do, fall back on excuses such as those just given, the Bible calls us to be a praying people. So how do we grow to be individuals who pray? Well the first and most important place to start is with the model of our faith, our praying Master, the Lord Jesus Christ.

Points to ponder and practice:

1. Reflect on what you find most difficult about the practice of prayer.

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Then little children were brought to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them.

Matthew 19:13a

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CHAPTER TWO

A thorough look through the gospel accounts of the life of the Lord Jesus reveals how important prayer was in the day-to-day routines of our Master. Prayer was not a token practice given at a meal or a synagogue meeting. Prayer was the very life-blood of Jesus’ activity.

Consider the following accounts recorded in the gospels.

“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.” (Mark 1:35)

“After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray.” (Mark 6:46)

“Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” (Luke 5:16)

These accounts give us insight into the regularity of Jesus’ prayer life. He prayed often, and almost always alone. While others were sleeping Jesus was praying. While his followers were busy interacting with each other, Jesus was alone interacting with God in prayer. It was Jesus’ custom to get away and spend time communing with his Father.

The gospel writers also reveal that the major events in Jesus’ life were accompanied by prayer.

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The Priority of Prayer in the Life of Jesus


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him. On reaching the place, he said to them, ‘Pray that you will not fall into temptation’. He withdrew about a stone’s throw beyond them, knelt down and prayed, ‘Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done’. An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him. And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.” (Luke 22:39–44)

In the stresses of public ministry as well as significant private moments, Jesus’ custom was to spend time in prayer. This habitual practice of Jesus’ prayer did not go unnoticed, particularly by those living closest to him.

There are many areas of Jesus’ life and ministry that the gospel writers record. They give detailed accounts of his journeys, his many miracles, his powerful and penetrating teaching. These activities marked his ministry and as a result many followed him. His closest followers, the disciples, spent their lives accompanying their Rabbi and learning from him. Of all the things in Jesus’ ministry, prayer was certainly up at the top of the list of behaviours that the disciples desired to emulate.

Luke 11:1 records:

“One day Jesus was praying in a certain place. When he finished, one of his disciples said to him, ‘Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples’.” (Luke 11:1)

Of all the things, Jesus’ disciples did not ask him…

Teach us to preach…

Teach us to read the Scriptures…

Chapter Two: The Priority of Prayer in the Life of Jesus

Jesus prayed at his baptism.

“When all the people were being baptized, Jesus was baptized too. And as he was praying, heaven was opened.” (Luke 3:21)

Jesus prayed before he called his Apostles.

“One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God. When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated apostles.” (Luke 6:12–13)

In Matthew’s gospel we read of one particularly trying day in Jesus’ ministry. On this occasion Jesus not only fed the masses, but he did so on the back of hearing his cousin John the Baptist had been brutally beheaded. For you and I such an emotionally taxing day would have ended in an early evening nap, but not so for Jesus. After a tumultuous twenty-four hours we read,

“After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray.” (Matt. 14:23)

Further, we find Jesus was praying at the moment of his transfiguration.

“About eight days after Jesus said this, he took Peter, John and James with him and went up onto a mountain to pray. As he was praying, the appearance of his face changed, and his clothes became as bright as a flash of lightning.” (Luke 9:28–29)

During his darkest hour in the garden of Gethsemane we read,

“Jesus went out as usual to the Mount of Olives, and his disciples followed


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3. Jesus was known for his prayer life. Skim through the Gospel of Luke and take notice of the theme of prayer. Write down your observations, of the when, where, why and how of prayer in the gospel.

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4. Finish this prayer, “Kind Father, forgive me for not prioritising prayer in my own life. Help me to follow the example of your Son by…”

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Chapter Two: The Priority of Prayer in the Life of Jesus

Teach us to evangelise…

Teach us to worship…

but…

“Teach us to pray…”

There was something uniquely powerfully and attractive in the prayer life of the Lord Jesus that his closest followers observed and desired to copy. Jesus was known for many things, but for his closest followers one thing that stood out most was the priority of prayer in the Master’s life.


1. What strikes you most about prayer in the life of Jesus?

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2. Reflect on prayer in your own life. In the different parts of your day (breakfast, work, family etc) where does prayer appear in your routine?

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17

CHAPTER THREE

The Purpose of Prayer

In looking at the life of the Lord Jesus it becomes obvious that prayer was a central component of his day-to-day existence. For anyone who follows the Master Jesus, the role of prayer should likewise be a core factor in his or her journey of discipleship.

Knowing we should pray like our Master, we now address the purpose of prayer. Why should we pray? There are two main purposes of prayer.

1. Prayer glorifies God.

The act of prayer is a tool through which God demonstrates his power and rule over humanity. In praying to God, we acknowledge in our hearts that he is the sovereign one who has control over all things. Prayer is an act of humility and dependence that glorifies God by acknowledging he is ruler and all powerful, and we are not. Jesus demonstrates the God glorifying nature of prayer when he teaches his disciples to pray in Matthew 6:9.

“Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” (Matthew 6:9)

This model of prayer shows an attitude of submission and humility as well as a purposeful desire to see God’s renown be made known.

In prayer we demonstrate our trust in God’s ability to sovereignly and graciously act in human history. As a result when God does act out his

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...if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

2 Chronicles 7:14


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After he left the room I commented to my wife how nice the anaesthetist had been. He had a warm, genuine and caring demeanour. I joked with my wife, “That guy is too nice, he must be a Christian”. About 45 minutes later the anaesthetist returned. He mentioned to me that he read in my files that I was a Christian pastor. He then said some words that I will never forget. Looking at Tamara and I he said, “I just want to let you know that I’m a born again Christian. I also want to let you know, you are in much better hands than just the hospital’s. You are in God’s hands”.

God’s timing was perfect. During our lowest time, our darkest hour, our biggest need, God answered our prayers very clearly by providing the right man at the right time to bring the right words of comfort. Thanking our brother in Christ, my wife went home and got a good night’s rest. Soon after my health also began to improve.

Why do I share that story? To me that experience reminds me of why I pray. During our difficult time had I not prayed God may well have done the same thing but I may never have noticed God’s obvious involvement. Having prayed, however, and seeing God so clearly answer my prayer provides me with a platform from which I can talk about God’s faithfulness, care and love. Prayers offered, even in weakness and doubt, can lead to great opportunities to bring attention to God and give him glory while at the same time providing encouragement to us as we see God at work in our lives.

Dependent prayer glorifies God as well as blessing us. The relationship between our prayer and God’s glory are well illustrated by Charles Spurgeon. While preaching on Psalm 50:15, (“call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor me.”), Spurgeon explains the “shares” between our prayers and God’s glory.

Chapter Three: The Purpose of Prayer

purposes in and through us, the end result should be praise to his glory. Jesus explained this truth to his disciples when he promised:

“I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father.” (John 14:13)

Several years ago I was diagnosed with a terrible cancer that resulted in several extended visits to hospital. During one of those times I experienced a particularly challenging period where my health appeared to be on the decline. One day while I was in a weakened state I mentioned to my wife that I felt a little faint. She helped me into my seat and then I promptly passed out. Before I knew it I woke up surrounded by multiple doctors and nurses asking me questions about my name, the date and where I was. After settling me down with some medication I spent the rest of the day in bed. My circumstances were not good. I could barely speak because of my weakened condition, I had no immune system due to the chemotherapy and I was being tube-fed. I felt confused, disheartened and the only thing that brought me cheer was the presence of my heavily pregnant wife. In tears we sat, not knowing what the future held. Tamara and I were both praying that this valley would soon pass. We prayed that God would intervene and act in our circumstance.

During this time an anaesthetist dropped by my room to see me. The doctors had decided that I should move from the ward to the Intensive Care Unit. As a patient, however, this was like moving from business class down to economy. The fact that they wanted me in intensive care brought only more consternation for my wife who by this stage was not willing to leave my side. I mentioned my desire to remain in the ward and not to go to intensive care. Surprisingly, the anaesthetist said that would be fine and agreed to come and visit me every two hours instead.


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“Prayer is the nerve centre of our fellowship with Jesus. He is not here physically to see. But in prayer we speak to him just as though he were. And in the stillness of those sacred times we listen to his Word and we pour out to him our longings… When the biblical words of Jesus abide in our mind, we hear the very thoughts of the living Christ, for his is the same yesterday, today, and forever. And out of that deep listening of the heart comes the language of prayer which is sweet incense before God’s throne. The life of prayer leads to fullness of joy because prayer is the nerve center of our vital fellowship with Jesus.”

D. A. Carson picks up on this relational component of prayer when he places it in the realm of a father and son relationship. He comments:

“The wise Father is more interested in a relationship with his son than in merely giving him things. Giving him things constitutes part of that relationship but certainly not all of it. The father and son may enjoy simply going out for walks together. Often the son will talk with his father not to obtain something, or even to find out something, but simply because he likes to be with him.”

As the father of three small children it brings me great joy, and often amusement, to chat with my kids. I love sitting with my son for him to tell me of the lizards he had captured at school, or his adventure in climbing a tree at lunchtime. Listening to him and sharing in his stories strengthens and builds our relationship. Were my son only to speak with me in the form of requests, “Dad, can you get me a drink? Dad, can you fix my bike? Dad, can you take me to soccer?” then there would be a relationship but not much intimacy.

Unfortunately for many of us, prayer has come to be synonymous with asking God for things. Often our prayers involve not so much dialogue


“Here are the shares. First, here is your share: ‘Call upon me in the day of trouble’. Secondly, here is God’s share: ‘I will deliver thee’. Again you take a share – ‘for you shall be delivered’. And then again it is the Lord’s turn – ‘Thou shalt glorify me’. Here is a compact, a covenant that God enters into with you who pray to Him, and whom He helps. He says, ‘You shall have the deliverance, but I must have the glory. You shall pray; I will bless; and then you shall honour My Holy name. Here is a delightful partnership; we obtain that which we so greatly need, and all that God getteth is the glory which is due unto his name… He must have all the honour from first to last’.”

When we pray we are more aware of God’s activity in our lives. His involvement in our lives brings encouragement, and ultimately should lead us to magnify him.

2. Prayer brings us closer to God as it helps cultivate intimacy with him.

Prayer cultivates intimacy with God as it involves us communicating with him over our needs and our inadequacies. When we speak to God, we are inviting him to move in our life. As we speak to him, we engage with him in a relationship.

“If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.” (John 15:7–8)

When we pray to God it gives us a chance not only to share the thoughts and issues of our heart, but also to reflect and think about his words and thoughts. As we lift our hearts to him we are reminded of his words to us. Pastor John Piper explains this relationship when he comments:


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3. Take some time to evaluate whether your prayers are relational (like a child and his/her father). If not, attempt to spend an entire day having periodic conversations with God about anything and everything just as a child might talk to his/her father.

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4. Finish this prayer, “Father, thank you so much for…”

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as one-dimensional prayers of request. Rather than being a dialogue between a father and his child, our prayers are merely a spiritual shopping list of needs and desires that we simply pass on to heaven. In doing so we neglect one of the chief purposes of prayer, namely, prayer cultivates intimacy with God.


1. Can you think of a time in your life when God distinctly answered your prayer? If so, did you share that prayer with anyone?

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2. Prayer is not simply asking for things, it is about relationship. What strikes you most about this relational understanding of prayer?

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One day Jesus was praying in a certain place. When he finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples.”

Luke 11:1

CHAPTER FOUR

When I was a younger Christian being asked to pray publicly was something that was quite terrifying. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to pray, it was just that I was unsure about how to pray. So when asked to pray I would do what so many do, I simply mimicked the prayers of others. I observed that others frequently used certain prayer clichés and figured if they repeated phrases like “heavenly Father” and “in Jesus’ name” then I should as well. I was not sure where such phrases originated from, but I heard many people using such language so I figured it was the right thing to do.

Over the past few years I’ve discovered that mimicking the clichés and the prayer language of others while not sinful, is not always helpful.

Even with my own children I’ve noticed that certain phrases and statements they use in their prayers often indicate they are simply mimicking my language and not using their own. In order to remove the static nature of such prayers my wife and I have begun to use different styles of prayers with our kids. Our prayers often involve just saying thank you to God. Other times we confess and say sorry to God. Still other times we offer requests for our friends or pray for the sick. In fact, if you were to come to our house for dinner you would quickly observe not only the variety of ways we pray but also the different postures of prayer. While we normally hold hands and pray, some nights the kids will bow their heads, other nights they will fold their hands, still other times they will raise their hands in prayer, and every so often our three children will all be doing something different!

The Pattern of Prayer


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Why do we do this? It’s because we want to encourage our children to view prayer not so much as formula to be recited, but as a dynamic conversation to be had.

What is good for my children to learn is also good for me to remember. Prayer is not about the repetition of words, the articulation of deep theological profundities, or the chance to wax eloquent. It is not about whether I stand or kneel or lift my hands. Prayer in its simplest form is the relational engagement between a child and a father.

The style in which we pray should be different from person to person. Why? Our prayers are diverse because each of us is a unique creation.

My children have different personalities and engage me on that basis. That’s what I love about my individual relationship with them. God has made each of us quite different and so the way we talk to God should reflect that. When I discovered this truth as a young Christian it brought with it much liberty. I didn’t pray before people; rather, I conversed with my Father.

Well, if prayer is about engaging with God, is there anything we can learn from the various patterns of prayer in Scripture? Most certainly! The Bible is full of diverse people praying diverse prayers to the same heavenly Father. In particular, the prayers of God’s people in the Psalms offer wonderful examples of how the godly engage with their Father.

1. The Psalms as a pattern of prayer.

Looking at the Psalms we discover that just as there are different seasons of life so also there are different prayers that are made. There are times

Chapter Four: The Pattern of Prayer

we talk to God in pain and anguish (Psalm 13), times of joy (Psalm 100), times of repentance (Psalm 51), times of praise (Psalm 149) and times where we cry out for deliverance (Psalm 20). In the Psalms we see that prayer, in this case in the form of songs, are uttered in very real human language, the language of relationship. That is why we love them so much.

The prayers of the Psalms represent how the godly can engage with God. Whatever your circumstances are there is a good chance that there is a prayer reflected in the Psalms that mirrors your feelings.

2. Paul’s pattern of prayer.

In the New Testament we also have a diversity of prayers. The Apostle Paul, for example, offers a variety of prayers for the different churches he writes to (Rom. 15:14–33; Eph. 1:15–23, 3:14–21; Phil. 1:9–11; Col. 1:9–14). Paul’s prayers are not one-dimensional, one size-fits-all prayers, but multifaceted prayers that differ from context to context. Paul’s prayers, like the Psalms, are diverse. There is not one unified style of prayer in the Bible because we have diverse children interacting with their heavenly Father over varying issues in life. There is not one prayer that is exactly the same as the other because prayer is about relationship, not rigid recitation.

3. Jesus’ pattern of prayer.

As we mentioned earlier, Jesus was known for his prayer life. In particular, our Lord Jesus gives us perhaps the clearest directives on the “how to” of praying.


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There are many recorded prayers of Jesus in the New Testament. As prayer was the regular habit of Jesus it should not surprise us that some of the contents of his prayers are recorded in the gospels. Indeed some of Jesus’ prayers were spoken out loud purely for the benefit of his listeners..

“Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. ‘Take away the stone,’ he said. ‘But, Lord,’ said Martha, the sister of the dead man, ‘by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days’. Then Jesus said, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?’. So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, ‘Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me’.” (John 11:38–42)

While there are many great prayers of Jesus, such as John 17 for example, perhaps the most well known is Jesus’ prayer in Matthew 6:9–13. It reads:

“This, then, is how you should pray:‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.Give us today our daily bread.Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one’.”

This prayer, sometimes known as ‘The Lord’s Prayer’, provides us with a wonderful model as to both the practice and content of prayer. Let’s take a closer look at the prayer and see what we can learn from Jesus’

example.

a. Prayer is couched in the context of a relationship.

“Our Father”

Christian prayer, unlike the mantras of eastern religions, is not based on impersonal chants and vain repetition; rather it is the language of personal relationship. Jesus demonstrates in this his relationship with God. He doesn’t offer his prayers to a statue, a saint, or a priest, in the hope that they will take his prayer to God. No, Jesus approaches the Father himself. By using the term “our” he indicates that we have the same access for we have the same Father. The praying believer has access to God himself, not at a distance, but as a child approaching a father.

A few years ago one of my daughters spent the night having a sleepover with a friend from pre-school. Her friend was Israeli and spoke Hebrew in the home. As a theologically trained dad, I was most pleased when she greeted me the next morning with a Hebrew greeting, “Abba, boker tov!” Her reference to me as “Abba” reminded me of the personal nature of our relationship with God. Unlike so many religions, the God of Jesus is not an unknown personality somewhere out in the cosmos. No, the God we pray to is the one whom we can intimately refer to as Father.

Paul picks up on this father/son relationship when he writes,


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“For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, ‘Abba, Father’. The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.” (Rom. 8:15-16)

Not only is God our Father, but we also learn that he is…

“in heaven”

While there is intimacy reflected in the relational address of “Father”, the qualifying phrase “in heaven” reminds us of the greatness of God. It is possible to know him in a familial sense, and at the same time he is characterised by his position as the one ruling from on high. This reminds us of who God is when we approach him, as well as who we are before him. This theme of God’s majesty and power will be further articulated in the next line of the Lord’s Prayer.

b. Prayer should reveal our desire for God’s glory and renown.

The first petition after addressing God as Father, is one that seeks the glory of God.

“hallowed be your name,”

God’s “name” or reputation is to be “hallowed,” that is set apart. The God to whom we pray is distinctly “set apart”, “other” or “holy”. The idea that our God is distinct in his glory and power is a theme found in many parts of the Scriptures. In the Old Testament we read of God,

“Among those who approach me I will show myself holy; in the sight of all the people I will be honored.” (Lev. 10:3)

“Be holy because I, the LORD your God, am holy.” (Lev. 19:2)

“Remember the former things, those of long ago; I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me.” (Isa. 46:9-10)

Jesus’ prayer that the Father’s name would be “hallowed” is consistent with the Old Testament. His prayer reminds us that each of our prayers must surely begin with an acknowledgment and commitment to the idea that God is the true Sovereign and authority over all of humanity. Our prayer and hearts’ desire should be that God’s renown and rulership becomes known throughout the whole earth.

This desire is made more apparent in the next part of the prayer. In the next stanza Jesus prays…

“your kingdom come,your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”

Here Jesus teaches us to pray that the execution of God’s “kingdom” would come to pass and his “will” in our current experience would be executed now just as it is already “in heaven”. This is similar to the exhortation in Matthew 6:33 where God’s children are strongly advised to “seek first his kingdom and his righteousness”.

The desire stated in the prayer for the coming of the kingdom makes known our desire for God to come and rule in righteousness. At this time all the nations will be placed under his feet and all rebellion will be quashed. It is the desire to see God’s eternal plan of redemption come to pass. It is praying for the consummation of history when God will judge the world in righteousness (see Matt. 25:31–34). Until that time, the believer prays that he or she might live righteously in the already


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kingdom while waiting for the not-yet kingdom.

The yearning and prayer for the coming of God’s kingdom should be a regular part of our regular prayer life.

Every time we hear of a natural disaster causing mass destruction and loss of life we should pray for the coming of God’s kingdom. When we watch the news and see war, violence, injustice and crimes perpetrated against children or the elderly our hearts should cry for Jesus to come and rule in righteousness. When a loved one is taken from us in cancer we should yearn and long for the day when Christ rules over all, including death. It was this longing the Apostle Paul talked about in Romans 8 where he states,

“we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies.” (Rom. 8:23)

As we live between the first and the second comings of Jesus we live in tension. While we willingly participate in God’s kingdom now, there are still millions who don’t recognise God’s sovereignty and authority over the world. We live in a broken world where pain, injustice and death often rob us of our joy. Though Jesus is king, not all bow the knee at this time. So, like the prayer of Jesus, the prayers we offer should be driven by the desire to see God’s kingdom rule and reign to come in fullness and power.

Having demonstrated the primary importance of acknowledging the worth and pre-eminence of our Father and king, Jesus now moves on to reveal another truth about prayer.

c. Prayer shows our dependence upon God for sustenance.

“Give us today our daily bread.”

The request for “daily bread” reminds us that we are people in need. As we pray asking God for things, we are in effect acknowledging our deficiency along with his sufficiency. In humility we seek our needs to be met. Fortunately the Bible presents that we have a Father who welcomes us to ask of him.

“If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” (Matt. 7:11)

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Matt. 7:7)

Often we live lives that are full of presumption. Every day we enjoy the blessings of God. We in the Western world enjoy the bounties of food, clean water and wealth unknown to billions around the world. Rather than acknowledging that these blessings come from God, we enjoy them believing them to be the fruit of our labour. In the Old Testament this was a potential problem. As Israel was on the verge of entering the promised land, God warned them not to presume upon his blessing. Entering a land filled with milk and honey he said to them:

“Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart


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will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.” (Deut. 8:11–14)

One of the temptations we often face is to forget that the source of all our blessings is our heavenly Father. The prayer that Jesus models for us is a prayer of dependence and sustenance. The prayer of dependence recognises that every good and perfect blessing comes not from the labour of our own hands, but from our generous God. One of the challenges to our dependence is the fact that we live in such bounty. Like the Israelites, we often receive the good gifts of God without saying so much as “thank you”. In recent years I’ve tried more intentionally to thank God for his daily provisions. It is right to give thanks to God when you arrive at work every day. It is appropriate to offer thanks as you fill your car with petrol, or your shopping trolley with groceries. Why? Because our Master delights when we live grateful lives that are openly dependent upon him.

d. Prayer highlights our need to forgive and be forgiven.

“Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”

Though this prayer of Jesus is often known as the Lord’s Prayer this particular portion of the prayer is something that Jesus had no need to pray. As Jesus was fully perfect and without sin, here our Master models for us what we, his frail disciples, ought to pray. Here we are reminded that we should regularly spend time asking God to forgive our sins, just as we must seek to forgive those who have offended us.

In several parts of the Scriptures we are exhorted to ask forgiveness for our sins.

“If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:8–9)

Confessing our sins has the idea of agreeing with God that we have missed the mark of his glorious standard (Rom. 3:23). As we confess, we find a merciful Father who pardons us from our wrongs by forgiving us. Indeed our God is sympathetic to our struggles in that he himself has experienced the challenges of sin. The author of Hebrews writes:

“Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Heb. 4:14–16)

As we confess our sins we find a God who is ready to forgive and offer grace to us. In the Lord’s Prayer we are told not only to ask God for forgiveness but we are in a like manner to offer forgiveness to those who wrong us.

e. Prayer shows our need for constant deliverance from the evil one’s power.

“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.”

Jesus reminds us of our dire need for help when it comes to resisting Satan’s ploys. Our Lord Jesus was attacked and tested by Satan (Matt. 4), so it should not surprise us that we too would come under fire. Just as


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Cain was tempted in the earliest parts of the Bible (Gen. 4:7), so also we live in the context where “sin is crouching at the door”. If we are living effective lives for Christ we should be well aware of the evil one’s desire to allure us away from Christ. Peter warns us:

“Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” (1 Peter 5:8)

Temptation is never far from the believer in Christ. We live in a time where we are bombarded by the “schemes of the devil” (Eph. 6:11). The click of a mouse button or a TV remote control can lead the believer down to the miry pit of sin. Movies, magazines and popular television shows dull our minds to the things of Christ and often feed us with the lies of the world. Our children are being raised in a world where things once frowned upon as immoral are presented as normal and acceptable. It is in this context that we would plead with God for strength.

The prayer for deliverance from “the evil one” is the prayer for strength and faithfulness. Jesus reminds us in his prayer that we need God’s sustenance not only for our daily bread, but also for our daily spiritual power as we battle the evil one. It is comforting that we are not a lone in our struggle over the “schemes of the devil” as our Lord Jesus prayed for us in this regard as well. In his famous priestly prayer in

John 17 Jesus says:

“My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one.” (John 17:15)

What a comfort it is to know that the Lord Jesus intercedes for us even in our temptation.

Points to ponder and practise:

Which part of Jesus’ model of prayer stands out to you most?

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Are there any components of the Lord’s Prayer that you have overlooked in your prayer life?

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Over a week take time every day to pray through one facet of the Lord’s Prayer. For example, when you are buying petrol, paying your bills or enjoying a meal, tell the Lord how thankful you are for his provision of your “daily bread”.

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Memorise the Lord’s Prayer and use it as a guide for your own prayer life.

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“Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.”

Matthew 6:9-13


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The Practice of PrayerCHAPTER FIVE

Prayer, like other areas of Christian life, requires discipline and practice. Though Jesus, Paul and others give examples of prayer, the logistics of how often, style and place of prayer are not rigidly put forth in the Bible. The Christian life, though filled with healthy habits, is not a regimented one-size-fits-all lifestyle. Prayer will look different in each of our lives.

While there is no specific formula for every Christian’s prayer life, there are clear parameters in Scripture that helpfully guide our day-to-day practice. Here are a few.

1. Prayer should be practiced in humility.

In his discussion of prayer in Matthew 6 Jesus explains what prayer is not.

Prayer is not a performance to be given to impress other people. Prayer is not about self-aggrandisement, rather, it is about humble dependence.

“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” (Matt. 6:5–8)

But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Matthew 6:6


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Part of our human sinfulness is the desire to be seen, known and respected. In Jesus’ day many would pray to be “seen by men”. These public prayers were merely acts of self-righteousness designed to curry favour with men. Jesus, however, reminds us that there is only an audience of one when we pray, and that is our heavenly Father.

2. Prayer should be practised with persistence.

When we pray, whatever our method, we must do so with regularity. Prayer is hard work. Prayer, unlike preaching, is not a singular event. In the New Testament we find several examples of people who persistently prayed.

The early Christian community prayed with persistence.

“They all joined together constantly in prayer, along with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brothers.” (Acts 1:14)

“They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.” (Acts 2:42)

The apostolic leadership prayed with persistence.

“God, whom I serve with my whole heart in preaching the gospel of his Son, is my witness how constantly I remember you in my prayers at all times;” (Rom. 1:9–10a)

“For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you…” (Col. 1:9)

Chapter Five: The Practice of Prayer

Not only do we have examples of persistent prayer, but we are also exhorted to join in this persistent prayer.

“Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.” (Luke 18:1)

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” (Rom. 12:12)

“And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” (Eph. 6:18)

“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” (Col. 4:2)

“Pray continually” (1 Thess. 5:17)

Though persistent prayer seems laborious at times, the good news is that our heavenly Father delights in answering our prayers. Jesus explains this when he says,

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” (Matt. 7:7–11)


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An old yet helpful model has been the ACTS prayer method. While it is simply a method and not something that must be followed, it has proven popular and helpful to many.

The movements in this form of prayer are fairly straightforward.

Adoration: The praying person focuses on the character of God and finds inner delight in him.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.” (Eph. 1:3)

Confession: The praying person focuses on his/her need for forgiveness.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

Thanksgiving: During this movement of prayer the praying person responds to God’s goodness through offering thanks.

“Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” (Eph. 5:19–20)

3. Prayer should be practiced in Christian community.

Prayer, though important individually, is a key component in the building up of the body of Christ as God’s people come together in dependence upon their common Father. Prayer should be practiced regularly among God’s people.

“They all joined together constantly in prayer, along with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brothers.” (Acts 1:14)

“They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.” (Acts 2:42)

“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” (James 5:16)

When we pray together there is mutual benefit. As prayer is relational it is appropriate for God’s children to talk with their heavenly Father in family contexts.

4. Prayer should include asking things from/of God, but should not be limited to only that.

When we think of prayer often the first thing we think of is asking God for something. Prayer, however, is much more. The praying person does, can and should go to God with supplication, however, at other times should go to God for issues of praise, repentance and even lament.

A doration

C onfession

T hanksgiving

S upplication



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Supplication: This is the part we most commonly associate with prayer. During this time we commit to the Lord our pressing desires and needs.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (Phil. 4:6)

5. Prayer should have a healthy other-person focus.

Take a moment to reflect on the subject of your prayers. Would you say they generally have an inward or an outward focus? While it can be appropriate to go through self-examination, seeking God for personal growth, we should also be praying for things and people outside of ourselves. Consider the following examples.

“I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours.” (John 17:9)

“Paul and Barnabas appointed elders for them in each church and, with prayer and fasting, committed them to the Lord, in whom they had put their trust.” (Acts 14:23)

“God, whom I serve with my whole heart in preaching the gospel of his Son, is my witness how constantly I remember you in my prayers at all times; and I pray that now at last by God’s will the way may be opened for me to come to you.” (Rom. 1:9)

“I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers.” (Eph. 1:16)

Many times when we pray we tend to focus on our own needs. While there is nothing inherently sinful about talking with God about our own lives, the Bible clearly teaches we should be talking with God about the needs of others as well.

6. Prayer should have a focus on spiritual growth and development.

Often our prayer meetings involve the collection of a hodgepodge of miscellaneous requests that we bring before God. It is not uncommon for us to attend a prayer meeting and hear of physical illness, financial struggles and relational issues. In fact I’ve been to prayer meetings that sound more a discussion of physical ailments than a night of prayer! While it is good and appropriate to talk with God about all things in our lives, including illness, the focus of prayer in the New Testament is not primarily about our outward circumstances. The key focus of the New Testament prayer is for spiritual growth and development.

Jesus, for example, prays for Peter’s deliverance from temptation.

“But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” (Luke 22:32)

Paul prayed for the Ephesians that they might have spiritual insight.

“I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints,” (Eph. 1:18)



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Paul prayed for the salvation of his fellow Jews.

“Brothers, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for the Israelites is that they may be saved.” (Rom. 10:1)

Paul prayed that love and knowledge would grow among believers.

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight” (Phil. 1:9)

Instead of praying simply for the outward issues of our lives, we should spend considerable time praying for spiritual growth and maturity. Rather than praying for our own physical ailments and job opportunities, we should pray for spiritual healing and gospel opportunities.

So, in review, there are several things to keep in mind when we consider practicing prayer.

• Prayer should be practiced in humility.

• Prayer should be practiced with persistence.

• Prayer should be practiced in Christian community.

• Prayer should include asking things from/of God, but should not be limited to only that.

• Prayer should have a healthy other-person focus.

• Prayer should have a focus on spiritual growth and development.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

Ephesians 6:18


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CHAPTER SIX

It would be very easy to read a little book about prayer and remain in your guilt over your struggle with prayer. The goal of this book, however, is not to discourage you with the difficulties of prayer, but to take some of the mystery out of it. Prayer, it has been suggested, is not about mastering difficult formulas and techniques as much as it is primarily about our relationship with God. Prayer is an opportunity for you and I to talk to and commune with our generous and kind heavenly Father.

Prayer is not so much about the words we say as much as it is about the attitude of our hearts. Prayer is not a one-dimensional activity of simply asking things from God. It is about living with a daily awareness of God’s presence. Prayer is about engaging with God and talking with him about anything and everything in life. Prayer is about a son or daughter talking with a loving Father.

In my experience there are a few things that I found helpful in improving my time with God in prayer. Here are some ideas that you might like to try in your own prayer life.

1. Meditate on the Lord’s prayer.

I have found it very helpful to meditate and ponder on single parts of the Lord’s Prayer. For example, I might spend my day just focusing on the phrase “hallowed be your name”. With that as my prayer for the day I might spend time praying and speaking with God about my desire to see his name “hallowed”. I might begin my day by telling him how I would

Chapter Six: Where to from Here?

like to honour his name at my workplace. During the day I might think about how God is distinct from the rest of the world’s so-called ‘gods’. I might talk to him about my desire that my kids might know that there is only one true God and he is different than others. At dinnertime, as I give thanks for the food, I may recognise that our God is distinct and there is no other.

I find that using Jesus’ prayer is a good model for me to keep my mind on that which is most important. While it is good and appropriate to pray the Lord’s Prayer, I have found that meditating on the various components of the prayer can also be very helpful. You might want to take a week and try praying a different portion of the Lord’s Prayer every day.

2. Write your prayers.

One of the challenges to my prayer life is that often my mind wanders. I know as you read this that you’ve probably experienced this as well. Many times I have found myself talking with God only to find myself either asleep or distracted. My prayers often go like this:

“Father, thank you for all the things you have given to me. I thank you for my wife and children, for the provision of work and for a place to live. A place to live… yeah, I like our place. I do need to mow the lawns though. I wonder if I have petrol for the lawnmower…”

If you’ve ever prayed I’m sure you’ve experienced and prayed something like the prayer above. One of the methods I’ve found helpful in the past is to write prayers. Several years ago while I was at Bible College I began to write (or type!) my prayers. The primary reason for this is that it kept my mind on track while I was praying.

Where to from Here?


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Chapter Six: Where to from Here?

If you consistently find your prayers getting derailed, it might be helpful to write them down or type them onto your computer. But be careful as prayer is a relational language and your conversations with God need to remain natural. Recording your prayers may provide greater clarity with the added benefit of serving as signposts of your spiritual journey.

3. Make a time to pray.

In looking at the life of the Lord Jesus we noticed that it was custom or habit to get away from the distractions of life to commune with the Father. For him, that was sometimes early in the morning, at other times it was late in the evening. The time of prayer will be different for all of us. We all have different schedules and different seasons of life. Some of us are morning people, others night people. Some have small children and have no time in the morning. Still others are employed in shift work. The bottom line is we are all on different schedules and we are all very busy.

If we don’t make time to pray we most likely won’t pray. I have several times a day where I have good opportunities to dialogue with God uninterrupted. I rider a scooter to work and as I go I’ve used this as a little ‘time window’ to communicate intentionally with God. For my wife, her time of prayer is often during the middle of the day when the kids are at school. I’ve known people to pray on the train to work, during their morning tea break or in the shower.

God is not concerned about the location or the time of prayer, he just wants us to do it. Work out your schedule and factor in ‘time windows’ when you will not be distracted and can spend time with God. If you don’t plan it, it is unlikely to happen.

4. Pray with others.

One of the things I struggled with as a Bible College student was praying regularly. I discovered I was not alone in this and that among others my neighbour struggled with this as well. In our common struggle we decided it might help if we prayed together. So for the next year my friend Kurt and I prayed almost daily with each other. They weren’t necessarily long prayer sessions but it was regular and habit forming.

I’ve found that having someone else to pray with me helps immensely. In my current life circumstance I pray with several others. I pray with my wife before we go to bed. I pray with each of my children individually. At church or home group I will pray with other believers. I find that meeting intentionally with others to pray, even for a short time, helps.

Someone once told me, “there are many things in life you can do by yourself, but being a Christian is not one of them”. I think that statement is right. We need to encourage each other and push each other on to spiritual growth (Heb. 10:24–25). I think praying helps this growth take place. If you want to grow in your prayer life then I suggest finding someone to pray with.

5. Speak to your Father often and about everything.

As we discussed earlier, prayer is about relationship. When I relate to my wife I don’t just ask things of her, instead I talk with her about her day and my day. I tell her about a project I’m working on. I tell her how I feel or who I ran into at work. I tell her about my son’s soccer match or the book I’m reading. There is nothing too big or too small that I don’t talk with my wife about. Why? Because for our relationship to grow I need to share my life with her.


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If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

Matthew 7:11

God has communicated to us through his word. As he speaks to us through the Bible and through the Holy Spirit, he wants us to talk with him through prayer. Often, however, we only come to God when we are in need of something. Too often our prayers are merely shopping lists of request. Get in the habit of viewing prayer as a chance simply to talk with God. If you’ve had a great day, tell him. If you’ve got concern over a work issue, tell him. If you’re unsure of a decision to make, tell him. When you are in the supermarket buying food, thank him for his generous provision. When you are at the beach or enjoying a good meal, let him know. When you are feeling sad or heartbroken over an issue, tell him. The location means little, the dialogue, however, is of great value. Make prayer a natural language not an arduous task. Remember, prayer is about relationship not ritual. Speak to God as a son or daughter would speak to a loving Father.

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