Pitstop – stress and relaxation

Sheila Stephen

Stress is a reaction to change or challenge, good or bad

Other definitions

An imbalance between demand and resources

When perceived pressure exceeds your ability to cope

Flight/fight

Stress tables (Holmes & Rahe 1967)

Death of spouse – 100

Separation – 65

Death of close member of family – 63

Major change in health of family member – 44

Pregnancy – 40

Major illness - 53

Cont.

Major revision of personal habits – 24

Moving house – 20

Major change in social activities – 18

Christmas – 12

Retirement – 45

Changing new line of work – 36

Meeting a Lion!

Eyes – blurred vision

Glands – sweating, dry mouth

Breathing – faster

Stomach – nausea

Skin – tingling, numbness

Head – faint, loss of balance

Heart – beats faster

Hands – tremor

Legs - shaking

Symptoms of Prolonged Stress

Physical

Palpitations

Tight chest/breathlessness

Indigestion/nausea

TirednessMuscle twitches/vague aches & painsSkin irritations & rashes

Clenched fist or jawFrequent infections (colds, flu)Constipation or diarrhoea

Rapid weight gain or lossChange in menstrual patternTension

Symptoms of Prolonged Stress

EmotionalMood swings

Worrying more

Anger/irritability

Guilt feelings

Drained, no enthusiasm

Anxiety/nervousLoss of confidence & self-esteemLoss of concentration

Behavioural

Increase in drinking, smoking

Loss or gain in appetite

Change in sleep pattern

Loss of interest in sex

Withdrawal from people

Too busy to relax

Lack of self-care

Pressures

Hospital? RelativesSiblings

The system

Finances Marriage/Relationship

The future

isolation Always “there”

Different parenting

Other People’s Reactions

StaringCuriosityAnguishRecoilEmbarrassmentDread

Parents’ Reactions

Blame

Disbelief

Anger

Fear

Despair

Guilt

“Loss” of child

Help – other people

Quote from a Mum

The people I came into contact with in the

early months were only interested in my child, they never asked how I

felt...everyone just expected me to ‘carry

on and cope’..and I don’t feel I am always…

There are times when it is a nightmare and you feel like throwing yourself down the stairs so that YOU can go to hospital for a rest!

Quote from a Mum

Quote from a Sibling

I felt that since I was ‘normal’ I didn’t

deserve attention. If I ever asked for anything my grandmother would

remind me that my sister’s needs were greater than mine, since she was in a

wheelchair.

Stress Management

Demands

Control

Support

Clarity of role

Management of continual change

Mental

Learn to recognise the NATS:

Catastrophising

Negative focus

Personalising

Magnifying or minimising

Jumping to conclusions

Physical

Diet

Exercise

Breathing

Relaxation

Stress Management

Dealing with Thoughts

Unhelpful thoughts

Helpful thoughts

It’s no good contacting that organisation, no one understands.

I might as well try, what have I got to lose.

EmotionalAcknowledge & name

Explore

Understand

Act

SocialSupport network

Boundaries

Flexibility

Creativity

Don’t compare!

Stress Management

Spiritual

Parents – Your Relationship

Talk and listen – keep the door open between you

Stay “in touch”

A date night!

Counselling

Resources for Stress Management

Relaxation Exercises (www.glasgowsteps.com)

Living Life to the Full (www.livinglifetothefull.com)

Northumberland Tyne & Wear NHS (www.ntw.nhs.uk/pic/selfhelp/)

MoodGYM (www.moodgym.anu.edu.au)

Bibliotherapy schemesPrescribed Exercise schemes

A word about support

Parent support groups

Befrienders (Care For The Family)

Sibling support groups

Facebook groups

Carers UK

Care for the Family

• Care for the Family is a national charity which aims to promote strong family life and to help those who face family difficulties.

• Care for the Family, Garth House, Leon Avenue, Cardiff, CF15 7RG

• Tel: 029 2081 0800• www.careforthefamily.org.uk• Care for the Family is a registered charity in England and Wales (number

1066905) and in Scotland (number SCO38497). A private company limited by guarantee (number 3482910) registered in England and Wales.