people pleaser, how to stop being a doormat to others?
TRANSCRIPT
1 S E T Y O U R L I M I T S
Think about your priorities. It could be your values, goals or beliefs.Set your limits based on your priorities.
2 S T A L L F O R T I M E
As you have defined your limits, you have more clarity on whether to accept the request or not. If you cannot figure out whether the favor is within your limits, ask for time to think.
3 L I M I T Y O U R O F F E RSuppose you agree to do a favor. You can limit your offer. Limiting your offer does not only make you more assertive but restricts the amount of work you must do.
4 L E A R N T O S A Y N O
When someone asks you a favor, check whether the favor is within your boundaries. If you are in doubt, ask for more time. If you find the help is against your values, say ‘no’ to the requester. Provide a valid and relevant reason for your ‘no’ it will be easy for you to convey it to the requester.
5 P R O M P T Y O U R P R E F E R E N C E SExpress your preference or opinion with honesty. Sharing your choice doesn't mean ignoring other people's preferences and imposing your own. Just state your position, and let a friendly discussion or a majority vote determine the result.
A People Pleaser always feels the need to be a nice person almost all the time, even when he or she has every reason to be angry or upset. People pleaser tries to override his or her natural reactions.
A S K F O R F A V O R SIf you are a people pleaser, you enjoy helping others. But start to ask favors for you.Start by asking for small things like a few seconds of someone's time.
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HOW TO STOP BEING A PEOPLE
PLEASER
7 A V O I D S E L F I S H E X P L O I T E R S
When you start asserting yourself, you will see your real friends respecting your boundaries. You will also realize the people who take advantage of your inner people pleaser. Avoid such selfish exploiters wherever possible.